Original subtitles

This is a handsome crew for sure.

Everybody’s cute.

I’m quite good at the bump.

I look like your ex-boyfriend?

It’s... ed up that this is the only

female attention I’m getting.

- Ballissimo! - Ciao bello!

Another one dusted.

I’m not like in love with Gary.

It’s just casual sex to me.

I’m trying to figure out if Colin and Daisy

smashed last night.

What do you think of me and Colin kissing each other?

Maybe there’s a little bit of jealousy there.

You can’t even tell me that you have feelings for me?

Maybe I’m a coward in that sense.

And I’m just too scared to tell you.

What... ing warp zone am I in right now?

You know the toilets aren’t flushing.

Water just comes spewing out.

That’s... ing disgusting.

- Oh, okay Colin! - Yeah?

I’m almost overflowing!

Oh, !

Oh my God, I can’t go down. Gary’s gagging.

Oh!

Literally my worst nightmare.

Bro, we’re gonna have to ...ing break some pipes.

Which toilet is it?

Yeah.

Because our toilets are flushing and they’re working fine.

Can we put a valve and just pressure it forward?

Yeah, that’s a good idea. Let’s try that.

I’ll crank up the suction.

Yeah?

Alex, you’re gonna stand by the vacuum.

Okay.

To get this turd, that’s the size of a football

out from blocking up these pipes,

we’re gonna have to start by pressurizing the lines.

Put the vacuum end on the end of that hose

and as soon as you hear like...

But you put too much pressure

and you’re gonna have an explosion

straight up one of the toilets.

That’s horrific.

I’m gonna pressurize it, Okay?

What the?

Oh, God.

Any suction at all?

No.

, I’m just praying my clothes aren’t covered in sh... .

Oh my God. This is all just sh... water.

Jesus Christ.

Thump! Got it!

So gross.

What was it?

I just got a... thump, thump, thump.

Come on, baby.

Definitely smells like sh... .

Yes! It’s working.

I’m gonna throw up.

The blockage is gone?

Yep.

Yeah, baby.

Yeah.

Then we wouldn’t be dealing with all that sh... .

Gross.

- Dais? - Yeah.

That’s not me.

Wash your hands, everybody.

Oh my God.

Okay. I have a finally bleached everywhere.

Colin, if you need a volunteer to test them, I’m game.

How are you, poopy boy? I’m just kidding.

Please don’t call me that.

You’re a poopy girl.

All crew, all crew.

Let’s get everybody together in the saloon for a tip meeting.

Thank you.

Let’s go.

That’s one of the grossest things I’ve ever seen.

Get the taste of ass out of my mouth.

Charter five.

Having a four-person charter gave us an opportunity

to kind of catch up, get ahead of the game.

I think we did really well.

Ileisha, I got another opportunity to taste your food.

- It was delicious. - Thank you.

I appreciate that.

And now for the tip.

Total is $13,000.

1273 euros per person.

Yay.

- Yeah, baby. - I’m stoked.

You guys will be heading out for dinner tonight.

Gary, have a really happy birthday.

I want you to have fun tonight,

but I want you guys to save some energy for tomorrow.

Because...

You guys have the whole day off tomorrow.

Yes!

I’ve got you guys a private cabana on Blu Beach,

and they will also be doing dinner for you.

Oh, thank you.

Recharge your batteries.

We still got half the season to go.

Thank you, Glenn.

I’m ready for a... ing drink.

Mazel tov!

Sorry.

This has been a very, very tough season for me,

so there’s sun, there’s beer.

There’s Colin, like, yeah. Pretty... ing stoked.

Cheers!

Cheers, everybody.

- Cheers, everybody. - Happy birthday, Gary.

- Happy birthday. - Thank you.

Okay, can we do covers, boys?

And that’s about it for the day.

Si, senor.

Glenn, we’re setting up a party for Gary up there.

Oh, nice.

- Are you joining us? - Yeah.

Okay, so we’re just going to set up something now.

Yeah, that’s not a bad idea.

So we’ll do it before we go out and we’ll have cake.

We can get his face printed out,

and then we’re like, everybody’s Gary.

It’s all for you, Gary.

It’s shower time.

Okay, sweet. I appreciate all your help.

So what do you do?

- Water. - Yep.

- Charger. - Yep.

- Magnesium. - Yep.

- M&M’s. - You’ve got it, girl.

No condoms. Because why?

- No sexo. - No sex.

I’m convinced everything stinks of sh... .

Half a cake for Gary.

- Oh, I like that. - ♪ Gary’s lucky underwear ♪

♪ Gary’s lucky underwear ♪

So ready for a day off.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

Oh, that was a good spray.

That’s a nice top. I like the color.

The situation with Daisy and I just feels natural.

You know what I mean?

Like, because we know each other so well,

it’s just comfortable.

The only thing I’m concerned about

is that it’s going to affect

our friendship, because we’re great friends.

We may not be great lovers, yet.

He’s coming. He’s coming.

- Oh, sh...! - Masks, masks, masks.

Masks, everybody.

I can’t see sh... .

Oh!

Hey!

Sure is a good looking guy.

Yeah, baby.

I want the best birthday ever!

Yes, Glenn.

You get a Gary. You get a Gary.

Okay, natural. Oh, Gary, you’re so funny.

The fact that a girl won’t said goodnight to me

after we’ve had sex, it... ing hurts.

Drop it.

Cheers, cheers, cheers.

Yeah.

Woo!

This is nice.

There’s enough Gary for every one tonight.

Really?

No.

- Worst birthday ever. - Yes, yes.

- Daisy. - Yes.

Come down here quickly, please.

Daisy, can I ask a favor?

Just because it’s my birthday, tonight

you have to be nice to me.

I’m always nice to you.

No, but you can’t shove me under the bus tonight.

Your fly’s open.

I also feel like you need to brush your hair.

I’m glad that you just had... ing dinner,

but there’s people who need to go to bed.

So I’m asking you nicely, please don’t do that tonight,

because I don’t want to get upset.

Maybe I took it a bit too far taking the piss out of Gary,

but if he was so upset,

I have no idea why he never brought it up before now.

So, I don’t really got it.

- Daisy? - Yeah, no. Noted.

...ing hell.

You guys have fun.

We’re going to have a good vibe all night.

I’m not the smartest guy in the world,

but tonight I’m trying my best not to offend anybody.

Can we drink tequila between your boobies tonight?

Shut the up.

I respect all the girls. I like them all.

So, number one goal is just drink less,

shout less, and just be less.

- Cheers for Gary. - Happy birthday.

- Daisy Poo? - Cheers.

Those ladies were into you, Chase.

A Southern charm.

All of them were definitely 10s in their heyday.

So, I just imagine they know some things.

Chase seemed real subdued tonight.

I think he’s a little gun-shy.

If she’s got three beach houses

and one foot on the banana peel,

she’s an automatic 10.

Oh, this is nice!

This place is sick as.

Ladies first, please.

Pretty place, hot chicks.

Okay, water.

- Can I get you some food? - Burrata and risotto.

Same thing for me, burrata.

Then all the same.

Thank you, guys. I’ll bring the food.

I need some sunglasses, guys.

Oh. Wow.

They look so good.

- Colin, where’s your beer? - Cheers.

Cheers. Cheers.

Thank you very much.

It’s all sh... , everything’s sharing here actually guys?

Mm.

That’s so sh... , because obviously you two are so close.

- Yeah. - I’m like, ugh.

The idea of hurting somebody’s feelings

and not even realizing it.

I feel awful.

Like, awful, awful.

I can’t look at him. I can’t be around him.

Coming up...

You look beautiful in that bikini.

That’s not even a motorboat.

Really?

Now I just feel like this really, really awful person.

I feel like everything I say is wrong.

Oh, my God, I’m so sorry.

Like, that’s just like a hectic situation.

- All right. - Should we get our drinks?

Stupid people, yeah.

Here we have red prawns from Amsterdam.

Oh, sh... .

The rosés really nice, guys.

It’s very delicious, isn’t it?

One with salt...

...ing delicious.

That’s so good.

I love this affection.

You’re welcome.

is this not enough?

It’s more than enough.

- No, I know. - You should accept.

I’m a person that needs affection.

This is how this is working.

...ing clearly.

I think we’re very opposites in that way.

I think if I was a little bit more forward,

apparently, that works for Mads.

I think she would definitely go for me.

But that’s just not really my style.

And knowing that Gary’s a little hyper-dramatic,

stealing the boss’s girl might not be the best move.

What?

Can I just say, I have never been to dinner

with better-looking ladies in my life.

Aww, Chase.

I’m not hitting on you. I’m just saying.

Cheers to your Chase.

Cheers to the mistakes I regret already.

this, I’m going home. You guys coming?

Yee-haw! Let’s go!

Hey, hey!

One, two, three. One, two, three.

Hey, you want to see something weird?

Look back.

- Jesus. - Rock step.

Oh.

Guys, I’m stuck in between a lot right now.

Yeah, give me another one.

Three things in life.

Penis, chocolate, money.

And tampons when you need them.

- And sleep. - Oh, sleep.

Yeah. Okay, four things.

Can I please get out of this... ing van?

Let’s go! Let’s get out, go!

I’m actually kind of sober.

Yeah, me too. I need a piss so bad though.

Why did you think she can carry you?

Oh, God.

Oh, my God. - ... ing hell.

Why is it like 800 degrees?

I will be in in a minute.

All right, kiss.

Kiss.

It happened. Me and Alex have kissed officially.

You did. That was a good kiss.

Huh?

Too much crap in my mouth. No one cares.

Sure, I’m going to come over and give you a kiss, too.

Gary!

I’m sorry that I made you feel so bad.

Regardless whether we’ve had conflict,

I do still believe that Daisy and I have chemistry.

It’s hard, because the feelings I have for Mads

are different than the feelings I have for Daisy.

Can we forget about it and have a good night?

Of course.

So I’m going back to the jacuzzi.

You don’t even... ing know what you want, bro.

- Bye. - Bye.

Now I’ll come and chat.

Guys, people have to actually...

Sleep, yeah.

All of a sudden.

I could get mad about all this.

Like, if this was my boyfriend,

I’d probably flip a... ing table.

Oh, Gazza.

Yes, Mads?

But I don’t even actually care.

I’m just taking care of me, and that’s it.

I’ve never had an experience like I do with Colin,

like we’re friends more than anything,

but I could easily see us falling into a relationship

because he makes me feel secure.

He’s kind, loyal, and like,

who doesn’t love kisses and cuddles?

♪ Happy birthday to me Happy birthday to me ♪

I think I picked the wrong cabin.

I should have bunked with Glenn.

Daisy snores like a bear.

me, man.

-Time to get up, dude, -Yeah, man.

Got a fun day ahead of you.

It’s trashed up here.

Oh, gosh.

Good morning, everyone.

Mmm. Mmm.

Stop.

Oh yes, let’s look at you.

You look comfy.

What’s up, y’all?

Hey, brü. Morning.

What are we cleaning?

Nothing. Day off, brü. Day off.

You and Daisy hooked up again last night, Colin.

I think so.

In the room this morning when I came in,

as Gary does, let’s it rip.

And then I just saw her storming out.

I was like, I see ya.

Cool. Done. Everything is cleaned.

Thanks, girls.

Okay, let’s have a drama-free day today.

I’m ready.

Capitano.

What’s going on?

Let’s have a good day.

- I’m ready. - Cute. I love that.

Thanks, Cap. Appreciate it.

You guys have fun.

Don’t do anything he wouldn’t do.

This is the vibe I need. Lucy.

Okay. Time for some fun.

Him and Daisy hooked up last night again.

Shut up.

How do you share a cabin with that woman?

She snores like a ...ing freight train.

Oh, that I know.

It doesn’t sound like normal snoring.

Like, it’s different. I swear.

So sweaty.

I’m also sweating my balls off.

- Ew. - Yeah, me too.

Men sweat.

I slept in Colin’s bed last night and I was like,

oh, my God, you’re literally like a... ing radiator.

Did you? When did this come out? Okay.

Are we getting hammered today or what?

Yeah?

Cheers.

I only drink on days starting with a "T".

That’s today, tomorrow, Tuesday, Thursday,

Thaturday, and Thunday.

- We’re here, bitches. - We got a drink.

My God, we’re so excited.

Oh, my God, they’ve got drinks for us.

Woo!

Oh, my God.

- Welcome, welcome. - Thank you.

Are you our waiter?

Alex. So’s he.

An amazing bottle for you guys today.

- Thank you very much. - Salute.

- Cheers, everybody. - Cheers.

- Cheers! - Oh, yeah.

Woo!

Let’s get this party started.

On charter, we’re all just like, go, go, go.

So I’m super excited just to unwind

and actually chat to everyone and be friends.

♪ Feels like heaven on Earth ♪

A day off. Like I actually can’t believe this.

I wish Glenn was here, but other than that, it’s perfect.

Yeah, baby.

I’m out this bitch.

Woo!

Should we get a round of tequilas, guys?

- What do you reckon? - , I’ll do a tequila.

Let’s get... ed up.

Thank you, Alex.

Stop being clingy, okay.

Shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, shot.

- Cheers. - I’m ready to get... ed up.

- What up, snorer? - Shut up.

I was the only one snoring.

You got... ing cream on your face.

Beer?

Yay! Good fun.

Cheers to our little ...ed up family, yeah?

- Yeah, Chase! - Woo!

Hashtag theboys.

- Yeah. Yeah. - Oh, the other chef.

No, no offense.

We can recover from this.

No. You know what it is?

He’s like 12 years older than you.

So he’s got 5 years more experience.

No, I’m going to the bathroom. Get off me.

- You upset? - No. I need a wee.

Who’s upset? Why would she be upset?

- Damn it. - How’d you piss off the chef?

Oh my God.

You just don’t say that to someone.

What a dickhead.

I’m just striving to be my best personal self.

I don’t need someone bringing me down.

Like, pick me up, you know?

Can I give you a piece of advice?

Sure, Chase.

When a woman asks you how she compares with someone else,

you say, you’re the best.

- So just lie through my teeth. - Yes.

Yes.

- This is my spot. - You are in your element now.

I’m in my straight element. My hair blows.

Everything’s good.

Thank you, Alex.

Right, right, right.

Daisy does have a model body, doesn’t she?

Shut up.

Daisy, just give me a spin.

Give me a spin. Give me a spin.

Stop. Stop.

Really?

Baby, come back to me.

Gary and Daisy have always been flirty,

but there’s a certain amount of respect and consideration

you can have for someone that you’re hooking up with.

It’s a very confusing little situation, this one.

Oh, ow, love hurts.

I just wanted to see where your head’s at after everything.

Gary.

You look beautiful in that bikini.

That’s not even a motorboat.

That’s just, like, I’m like...

Ooh, I love it.

I feel bad for Mads because I feel like

Maybe it is a bit deeper for Gary,

but Mads is never going to stop being Mads.

Like, she should still talk to the boys

and do all the things she wants to do

because Gary’s not her boyfriend.

At this moment, I’m enjoying the non-seriousness.

It is what it is.

Yeah, baby!

Whoops.

I did it.

Gary, here. I’ll pour it down the top.

Okay, Chase. Just don’t be afraid.

Open your mouth.

No, thank you.

Oh!

You okay?

You okay?

Did I upset you?

I’m sorry.

You are awesome.

Knowing that she takes a lot of pride

in being the best that she can be,

I should have definitely known better

than to bring something like this up.

Yeah, I shouldn’t have said it. I shouldn’t have said it.

You know I think you’re an amazing chef.

Come on. Let’s be friends again.

We are.

We good?

Are we friends again?

We’ve always been friends.

- Oh, God. - God, you’re so gross.

You’re actually gross.

I don’t know what Colin’s going to say about you.

Stop worrying about Colin, Colin’s fine.

- Kiss me. - No.

- Kiss me. - Uh-uh.

- Kiss me. - No.

Just a peck.

No, no, no.

I think I’ve made it clear

that Colin’s who I want to be with.

I know that Colin is a healthier choice.

And I think with Gary, it’s a game to him.

And I do think he wants me because he can’t have me.

- Gary, stop. - Stop what?

- You’re really inappropriate. - Is this all right?

No.

For me, I just feel like another number to him.

Like, I really, really do.

Should we have a belly race to the beach?

- Yes. - Let’s go.

You can’t use your arms or feet.

Yeah.

One, two, three. Go!

Mads, number one.

Uh...

Yes!

Finally. What we’ve been waiting for.

Are you having a good time then?

I’m having the best time. I wish this day would never end.

We’re basically on vacation having a holiday.

I like you.

You’re so pretty.

I know.

Guys, look.

What, Colin and Daisy, I... ing love them together.

I think her hands are on his chest.

Oh, no.

Whoa, Colin.

We have the table ready for dinner if you like.

Hooti-hoo, mother... ers, dinner time.

Let’s go, Colin. Put on your swaggy clothes.

I don’t have swaggy clothes.

- You look like a babe. - Perfect.

You’ve got cream all over your sunglasses.

Everybody, let’s vaminos.

Whoa, whoa, bye.

That is ridiculous.

This is, um...

I can’t say what I want to say,

because it is a recipe for disaster.

Maybe... , whatever. This is stupid.

Somebody take a picture. I’m living the dream.

This is saute di cazze. This is from Olbia.

Mussels.

Tuna tataki with a black garlic sponge

and mango chutney.

Oh, here we are.

I want to talk to Mads.

No, no, no, stay here. Stay here. We’re good.

Yeah, I know.

I’ll take it. Thanks, babe.

I know deep down you love me.

I don’t give a what you said, I know.

But clearly, that’s not going to happen now.

That’s... ing really good.

You have shown me your behavior.

You’ve shown me what I meant to you.

The pattern of what he says is so... ing ridiculous.

You know, I don’t want to be just another one

of his 10 million girlfriends.

Gary wouldn’t know real connection

if it slapped him in the face.

No, Colin. Colin.

Don’t be self-conscious. You’re crushing.

- Cheers. - Mate.

You see through?

Stop it. No more.

I wish I didn’t have COVID.

I think everything would be different,

because I know you like me, and you know I like you.

This is too complicated. It’s too much for me.

You’re hooking up with Colin to get back at me.

I’m not getting back at you.

Spitefully hooking up. That’s how I feel.

I don’t want to be with you,

because you want to be with everybody else.

You... ing could have had me a million times over,

and you didn’t want me.

Now that you can have me, now you... ing want me.

It was... ing the same as London.

You asked me to stay at your house, and I said no.

Exactly.

So you didn’t, I asked you to stay, and you didn’t.

You made your... ing choice.

What the are they even talking about?

What is going on here?

Having sex with you was ...ing amazing.

Shut the up.

I don’t want to be involved in this.

I’m so done with this conversation.

and I said no.

I asked you to stay, and you didn’t.

Why didn’t you kiss me in London?

Because we were having a good time with your friends,

and I want your friends to like me.

You’ll kiss anyone else in front of anyone.

No, not like that.

You made your choice, but the choices we make,

we have to live with them.

Having sex with you was ...ing amazing.

Shut the up.

What the are they even talking about?

What is going on here?

I don’t want to be involved in this.

I see your behavior.

Yeah, you take me with...

- You see my behavior? - right off, actually.

I have to look out for myself, Gary.

I’m so done with this conversation.

my... ing life.

Gary and I slept together when the season ended

last year in Menorca.

And we also slept together when we went to Disneyland.

After that, you know, he still did his usual Gary thing,

went from female to female.

He never tried to make it anything more.

I just wanted this thing to be between me and Gary, private.

Such a mess.

I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what to do.

I don’t know what you want me to say.

It’s been done. It’s happened.

So there’s no, no, no chance of this happening?

We have to move... ing on.

I can’t go back into the past.

You’re with Mads. I’m with Colin.

I really like Colin. I feel a lot for him.

Just like I feel a lot for you.

But it is what it is. I don’t know what to tell you.

Gary, what the?

Ugh!

- Whatever, then. - Dessert’s not happening, yeah?

We’re going home.

You’re all right? What happened?

- No, I can’t. - We can talk about it.

- No, it’s fine. - Gary!

I’m going to the taxi Everyone’s pissing me off.

Okay, let’s go, peeps.

- Woo-hoo! - Best day ever.

Oh, sh... . Winner, winner, chicken dinner.

I feel like I haven’t pissed somebody off remarkably.

I’m pinching myself. - ... ing finally.

I can have some fun and let loose and no one’s angry at me.

So much beer. So little time.

Chase, are you okay?

I’m... ed up.

What are you talking with Daisy about?

No, it was ridiculous.

Daisy was just like... it’s Daisy.

Oh, my God. Boring.

Can you guys just hold one beer?

- One beer? - It would help me so much.

- This one I’ll finish. - Oh, great.

Now this is exploding.

Ah.

I had the best time with both of you.

No, it sucks.

I’m not like, I hate Colin now.

I’m like, it’s one comment that sticks with me.

It was exactly like when Gary said that I was mean.

Yes, it’s exactly the same.

I’m like, I’m a mean person.

- I was like, this is awful. - Yeah.

Hello Parsifal!

Although they’ve never been observed while mating,

scientists have concluded that humpback whales

have numerous sexual partners.

Bye.

Help. Don’t leave me.

Are we going to bed together or not?

- Um... - Up to you.

- Did I say that? - No.

Get the out.

All right. I’m going to my cabin.

This is a lot.

Dude, I’m... ed up.

Okay. I love you.

Go to sleep.

Huh?

I’m not stupid. Come on, man.

Like, what’s going on?

Oh, baby. You okay?

Yeah, how about you?

Get these over your toes.

Tuck me in, Alex.

I just want to see if you’re okay.

Thank you. I appreciate that.

I love you so much.

There she is.

Are you okay?

Oh.

I don’t want anyone’s feelings hurt on the boat,

but Alex is a grown-ass man.

And with Gary, I’m getting a grown toddler boy.

I really did not play my cards right.

Move. Like, Jesus.

- Just... ing move. - Okay, fine.

So are you coming upstairs or what?

Chase, you’re going to bed.

Yeah.

No, I probably shouldn’t.

No.

Yum, coconut.

Coming up...

Hey, you two.

How’s Chase... ing sleeping?

Come with us, thruple.

- It’s big. - Come, Luce.

Oh, thanks, Colin.

I’m not here right now. Please leave a message after the beep.

Beep! Oh! Oh! What a pleasant surprise!

Good morning.

Yeah, he couldn’t hear sh... .

I just want some goddamn sleep,

and if this turns into an orgy,

I don’t really want to be a part of it.

Well, I’m going to a guest cabinet.

Everyone can suck my dick.

I’m okay.

I’m going to go find Alex.

Colin, you can’t take the whole comforter, you.

- I’m cold. - There’s three people in here.

It’s a thruple.

Alex!

Oh bless him!

Be considerate.

- Minor love triangle, is it? - Yes.

Is it, Gary?

Oh, God.

What?

No.

I’m not taking you to my bed, I’m taking you to your bed.

I don’t trust you, that’s the thing.

Come join Sleepover Club.

I’ve got a friend.

Alex!

Come cuddle.

No...

- Good night. - Bye, Alex.

No, I’m actually going to bed.

Okay.

I’ll come. Bye.

Good night, guys.

Perfect.

I don’t know what else to do.

Hi, guys.

That’s fair.

What’s down here?

What happens down here?

What the?

Like, why would you lie to me about that?

Hey. Stop.

It didn’t mean anything.

Stop. I’m trying to talk to you. Please.

...ed him twice. - Stop.

You don’t even have a... ing leg to stand on right now.

This is... ing bullsh... .

I feel... ing, like, stupid.

Next, on "Below Deck Sailing Yacht"...

I just want everybody to be okay.

I don’t know how to fix this.

If he’s not gonna forgive me for something like that,

then so be it.

This is the best birthday cake I ever had.

Yeah, maybe cut it up and I’ll put some right here.

They’re not gonna want any more, are they?

- Kevin, you want more cake? - I do.

That’s a really good.

No one better have touched that... ing cake, bro.

They want another slice.

- What’s that? - Engine room.

Smells like gas to me.