Original subtitles

NARRATOR: The Adventures of Superman.

Faster than a speeding bullet.

More powerful than a locomotive.

Able to leap tall buildings at a single bound.

MAN 1: Look! Up in the sky! MAN 2: It's a bird!

WOMAN: It's a plane! MAN 3: It's Superman!

NARRATOR: Yes, it's Superman,

strange visitor from another planet,

who came to Earth with powers and abilities

far beyond those of mortal men.

Superman, who can change the course of mighty rivers,

bend steel in his bare hands,

and who, disguised as Clark Kent,

mild-mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper,

fights a never-ending battle

for truth, justice and the American way.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

Yes, yes, I understand.

Of course, you realize I can't make any promises,

but I'll do the best I can.

Yes, I'll call you. Goodbye.

Chief, you're using your serious voice.

What was that all about?

That was General Thompson of the Department of Defense.

What did he want?

They spotted an unidentifiable aircraft over the desert.

Oh, no, not those tired flying saucers again.

No, this was more like a rocket ship.

What do they expect you to do about it?

Find it.

Find it? A rocket ship?

They're kind of hard to lose, aren't they?

They're not exactly small.

Now, this is serious, Kent.

All of their efforts to locate it have failed.

The general has one last hope. Superman.

And they're hoping you can contact him,

and tell him to get busy.

Now, just a minute, chief.

You know I'm working on a story already.

Besides, what makes you think

I can turn Superman on and off like a water faucet?

Well, try it. And that's an order.

Isn't that kind of a silly way

for a grown man to spend his time?

Well, chief, if you think it's so silly,

why don't you try to make one yourself?

[CHUCKLES]

Paper helicopters.

[SIGHS]

[♪♪♪]

Man, I've been working too hard.

Please take me to your leader.

What did you say?

Take me to your leader.

That's what I thought you said.

I want to see someone in command.

Well, Mr. White's the boss.

Is that the same as a leader?

Well, it's almost the same. A little more so.

Will you take me to him?

Well, he only sees people by appointment,

and anyway, he's out to lunch.

[♪♪♪]

All right, you stop pulling my leg.

But I wasn't pulling your leg.

Honest, I wasn't.

What good would that do either of us?

Hi, Jimmy.

Who's your friend?

Then you see him too? Of course I see him.

That's a relief.

Are you the boss?

No, I just work around here.

Perhaps I can help you?

Green hair.

Back home, we all have green hair.

Uh-huh. And, uh, where is back home?

Mars. It's just about the finest place anywhere,

and I'll never get to see it again.

Not ever.

Oh, come now, things can't be as bad as all that.

They're even worse.

Well, why don't you begin at the beginning

and tell me all about it.

Then Mr. Kent will write all about you in the newspaper.

That'd make you feel better, wouldn't it?

No, no, because then everyone would know.

You mean there's something to be ashamed of?

Yes, I'm ashamed of being...

Ashamed of being measly.

[SOBBING] They said I'd never die,

I'd just measly away.

That's why they banished me.

They banished you from Mars.

They said...

They said I was a disgrace to all of them

because I can't do anything.

They said it's because I'm so measly.

Sometimes I think I'm just stupid.

No, that's ridiculous,

I don't believe anybody thinks you're stupid.

Besides all this, I'm too little.

Everyone on Mars is 4-feet-2 inches tall,

and I'm only 4-feet-1 and three-quarter inches tall.

And they only make one size.

Did you ever see a looser uniform?

And my whole life, all I ever wanted

was a pair of shoes that fit.

Well, now, let's not worry about that. That's no problem.

I'm sure we can get clothes to fit you, Mr... uh, uh...

By the way, what is your name, sir?

We don't have names, we have numbers.

I'm Zero-Zero-Zero-Minus-One.

A real nothing.

Well, I don't think you're a nothing.

How do you do, Mr. Zero-Zero-Zero-Minus-One.

I'm Clark Kent. That's Jimmy Olsen.

Oh, uh, is it all right with you if we call you Mr. Zero?

Sure.

Hi, Jimmy.

Wow, what's that?

That is what is commonly referred to as a girl.

Around here, we refer to her as Miss Lane.

I'm very happy to make your acquaintance, Miss Lane.

I've never seen anyone like you before.

Well, haven't you got some word for your young admirer?

Women. You never know how they're gonna act.

One time they yak, yak, yak and the next time

they won't even say hello.

Just standing there like that,

she's about the prettiest thing I ever saw.

Even if she doesn't have green hair.

Yes.

Uh, Jimmy,

would you take Mr. Zero downtown

and buy him some clothes, please?

Well, sure, Mr. Kent.

Would you like that, Mr. Zero?

Golly, it certainly would be a relief

not to be tripping over my trousers.

[HUSHED] Try the boys' department.

Come on, Mr. Zero.

Goodbye, Mr. Kent.

Goodbye, Mr. Zero.

So long, stone face.

Now, Lois, you all right?

[SIGHS]

I'm all right now, I think.

What was that all about?

Gosh, I don't know, Clark.

I came in here and that funny little man pointed at me.

It was the strangest sensation.

I couldn't move or talk. Who was he?

Well, you better sit down for this one.

He says his name is Zero-Zero-Zero-Minus-One,

and he just dropped down from Mars.

Oh, Clark, how gullible can you get?

That's what the little man said.

Don't tell me you believe him.

I don't know, Lois.

I can't think of any better explanation.

And also, the Department of Defense

sighted an unidentifiable aircraft

that even Superman couldn't find.

I don't get the connection.

I think I'm beginning to.

If what the little man told us was true,

if he was banished from Mars, just for being measly...

How mean. Yes.

Then they might have brought him down in a rocket ship,

dumped him and turned right around and gone off again.

Well, I'd hate to try to sell that idea

to the Defense Department.

Yes, so would I.

But right now the thing that concerns me is

what happened to you when he pointed his finger at you?

You suppose he has some weird kind of power?

Well, I'll tell you one thing, I felt pretty weird.

Hm.

I wonder if... If he does have it.

And what's more important, I wonder if he knows he has it.

If you're not careful, you're gonna get yourself elected

one of the 10 best-dressed Martians in the country.

I just can't believe it. I can't believe it.

Well, seeing is believing, take a look.

Another Martian?

No, that's not another Martian, Mr. Zero, it's you.

It is?

Sure.

Then what am I doing out here?

Well, it's not really you, it's your reflection.

It's what we call a...

A mirror.

You mean, that's how I look?

That's right.

MR. ZERO: Not bad, not bad at all.

Would you like to have me wrap these up for you, sir?

Those old things?

As far as I'm concerned, you can throw them out.

CLERK: Yes, sir.

And I do thank you for all your trouble.

And I thank you.

It's been a pleasure to serve you.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

May I help you, sir?

Are you feeling all right?

[SIGHS]

Hey.

That was real crazy.

I beg your pardon.

Well, I... come in here for a pair of socks,

th-the character with the hair points at me,

all of a sudden, I freeze. Who is he?

Mr. Zero, he's a friend of Jimmy Olsen's and Clark Kent's.

Clark Kent, the crusading reporter?

Mm-hm. He must be up to something.

Mr. Zero told me he just dropped in from Mars.

Oh, Mars. Oh, well, that...

'Course, I don't believe him.

Well, Mars-schmars,

that power of his could come in mighty handy.

I don't quite get you.

Never mind, I just had an idea.

How about your socks?

Some other time. This is bigger than socks.

Well, you're working too hard.

I seem to thrive on it.

How about you? How do you feel? Fine.

Well, good. No ill effects

from the pointing finger of our Mr. Zero?

No, nothing so far.

Well, guess I'd better get back to work.

Okay.

Well, hi, sport.

Do you like it?

Sure do.

Well...

Jimmy, you did a great job.

Thanks, Mr. Kent.

Mr. Zero,

I have a question to ask you, sir.

How did you get to Earth?

They flew me down by rocket ship.

And they let you out in the desert? Yes.

And they turned right around and flew back to Mars?

That's right.

Uh-huh. That's what I thought.

Gonna have to tell the chief this.

I know he's not going to believe it,

but I have to give him the old-school try.

Chief.

Mr. White.

What?

[LAUGHS] [CLEARS THROAT]

I, uh, have a report for you on that missing rocket ship.

Of course, I don't expect you to believe it.

Mr. Zero, do you know what happens

when you point your finger at someone?

Well, sometimes you get your hand slapped

because it's not polite.

My mother always used to tell me so.

No, I mean when you point at someone.

No.

Point at Jimmy.

LOIS: See? That's what happened when you pointed at me before.

I just froze.

Oh, Miss Lane, I didn't hurt you, did I?

I wouldn't hurt you for anything in the universe.

Of course not. It went away in a few minutes,

just like it will with Jimmy. Watch.

[SIGHS]

I think I just broke the record for long yawning.

I didn't know I could do that.

I think it must have something to do

with you coming from a different planet.

The difference in the atmosphere or something.

Thank you, Professor Einstein.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Come in.

I'm looking for Clark Kent.

Uh, that is, I'm looking for you.

Who are you? Georgie Gleep.

What do you want with Mr. Zero?

Just wanna show him a little hospitality.

Introduce him to a few of the boys, maybe.

That's awfully nice, Mr. Gleep.

Oh, you just call me Georgie.

All right, Georgie.

You can call me Zero.

You know, Zero,

word's gotten around about you.

It isn't every day we get a visitor from Mars.

Now, being new here,

you're gonna need a lot of friends.

How about coming out to the house?

Why, I'd like that very much, Georgie. Good.

Don't you think you'd better wait, Mr. Zero?

What's to wait for?

Just being neighborly.

And after all, Miss Lane,

I can't hang around you,

Jimmy and Mr. Kent all the time.

That would be an imposition.

Well, you're a big boy.

Do whatever you think is right.

There's nothing wrong in making friends, is there?

'Course, there ain't.

Come on, chum.

So long, Jimmy, Miss Lane.

Bye, Mr. Zero.

So long, Mr. Zero.

Somehow or other,

I don't trust that Georgie Gleep.

Me neither.

Where's Mr. Zero?

I told the chief about him, he wants to see him right away.

Doesn't believe in him.

[LAUGHING] He thinks I've been overworking or something.

Well, he just left with a new friend.

Uh, Georgie Gleep.

Georgie Gleep. Gleep, Georgie Gleep.

Yeah, the name sounds familiar.

I can't remember from where.

You don't seem very happy about it.

Well, I'm not. I'm not, Lois.

The vibrations I get aren't good,

not a bit good.

Well, here we are, Zero. Home, sweet home.

You just make yourself comfortable,

Slouchy will be along any minute.

Who's Slouchy? Slouchy McGoon,

one of the best friends a guy ever had.

Real prince of a man.

Oh, hiya, Slouchy.

Hiya.

Slouchy,

I want you to meet a real smooth operator,

Mr. Zero.

Slouchy McGoon.

How do you do, Mr. McGoon?

Hiya, Zero.

Green hair? Sure.

Zero's gonna be a real big help to us.

I am? You sure are.

How?

Well, I was just getting to that.

Uh, Slouchy, you're in on this too.

You see, Zero,

in this world of ours, there are the good people

and then again, there are the bad people.

I guess I've been lucky.

So far, I've just met the good ones.

Yeah, that's right, like, uh, Clark Kent and Jimmy Olsen

and Miss Lane, yeah, they're all real fine.

[COUGHS]

And you and Mr. McGoon,

taking me in as a friend right off the bat,

that's pretty nice too.

Eh, yeah, yeah, well...

But, uh, there are a lot of rough characters

in this town that you don't know about yet.

Where are they?

Well, every day

from 10:00 in the morning till 3 in the afternoon

they hang out in that big, stone building

just around the corner from the Daily Planet.

And do you know what they're doing?

No.

Counting money.

Money? What's that?

[GASPS, SLAPS FACE]

Take it easy, will you, Slouchy.

Why did you hit yourself? Were you bad?

[CHUCKLING] No, no, h-he was, uh, killing a mosquito.

Seem to be a lot of 'em around here today.

Uh, but to get back to the money.

Money is something that's real handy

to have around if you want to keep on living.

You see, it pays the rent so you have a place to flop.

And you can exchange it for food.

Oh, I see.

And do you know whose money those bad guys have got

in that big, stone building?

No.

Miss Lane's.

How did they get it?

Well, being a lady

and not knowing any better, she gave it to 'em.

Then she must have wanted them to have it.

She's very kind, you know.

Eh, no, no, no, no. You don't understand, Zero.

You see, she trusted 'em with it, for safekeeping.

They're supposed to give it back to her whenever she needs it.

But they don't wanna give it back to her

because they wanna keep it for themselves.

Yeah, the dirty rats.

I see you're beginning to get the message.

Yeah, I'm reading you real good, Georgie. Good.

That's awful.

Then Miss Lane won't be able to get any food,

and she'll be hungry.

Yeah.

She won't be able to pay the rent, and she'll be cold.

And won't have anyplace to sleep.

Well, we just can't let that happen

to Miss Lane, can we, Zero?

We certainly can't.

But what are we gonna do?

I'm glad you asked me that

because that's where you come in.

Now, here's the idea.

Just before 3:00,

we go down to that stone building

I was telling you about, see,

we park the car out in front...

[♪♪♪]

He's been gone over three hours, Lois.

He should never have been allowed

to go off with that cheap, petty crook, Gleep.

I'm sorry, Clark.

Golly, if anything happens to him,

I'll never forgive myself.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Mr. Zero.

Golly, is it good to see you.

Why, what's happened?

That's what I was about to ask you. Where have you been?

I can't tell you. I gave my word.

Mr. Zero, Georgie Gleep is not a nice man.

Oh, you must have another Georgie Gleep in mind, Mr. Kent.

Because this one's so kind and good as can be.

So is his friend, Slouchy.

Slouchy McGoon?

That's right.

Oh, no.

What's the matter?

Well, McGoon and Gleep have been known to pull off

quite a few robberies in their day.

Robberies? What's that?

Well, that's when you take something

that doesn't belong to you.

But it was the others who did that.

They took...

Ah? And what did they take?

I'm very sorry. I can't tell you.

Hi, Mr. Zero.

Hello, Jimmy.

Mr. Kent, I, uh...

I forgot to cash a check today.

Could you possibly loan me five bucks till tomorrow?

Well, I'm afraid not, Jimmy.

You see, I'm running a little short myself.

I can, Jimmy. I got some money from the bank today.

Come on, it's in my office. Good, Miss Lane.

Wait a minute, Miss Lane.

What did you say?

I'm gonna lend Jimmy five dollars.

No, I mean about getting the money from the bank.

Oh, well, that's very simple.

I wrote out a check, and they gave me what I wanted.

They did?

Well, of course.

But Georgie said...

Uh, what did Georgie say?

I think you better tell us the whole story.

He said there were bad people in that building,

and they weren't gonna give Miss Lane any of her money,

so she'd be cold, hungry, and...

Oh, what have I done?

Now, look, nobody ever gained anything from crying.

What happened?

While I...

While I pointed my finger at the men

Georgie and Slouchy took all of Miss Lane's money.

A lot of other people's too, I'll bet.

Do you know what they did with it?

They said they were gonna mail it to Miss Lane

because she wouldn't ever know who did the good deed.

Oh, Miss Lane, I'm sorry.

I don't know what to do.

Oh, that's all right, we'll think of something.

They were right to banish me from Mars.

I'm no good, just no good.

Now, now, don't say that, you're very nice.

You just made a mistake but it's not your fault.

[SOBBING] But it is!

It is, if it hadn't... Hadn't been for me...

Have you any idea where they took the money?

No, but I know where Georgie lives.

Oh, you do, where?

It's a little place out on the road,

all by itself.

Just past the place where they stopped

to put something in their car

so they could go some more.

He must mean a filling station.

Yes, I think I know the place.

A sort of an old rundown house, is that right?

Yes, and Mr. Kent, you've got to let me

help you get Miss Lane's money back again.

I'll do anything.

Well, I'm afraid this sounds more like a job for Superman.

Superman?

We've heard about him even on Mars

from the time he took care of those meteors.

He's a good friend of Mr. Kent's.

Um, if I can arrange it, would you like

to help Superman get Miss Lane's money back for her?

Oh, yes. Can you arrange it?

Well, I'll try.

Jimmy, here's the key to my car.

Can you drive Mr. Zero over to Georgie's hideout?

And get there as fast as you can,

but, uh, don't break any speed laws.

Sure, Mr. Kent. Come on, Mr. Zero.

And what are you going to do, Clark?

I'm gonna try and contact Superman.

What do you mean try and find him? You always do. Why is that?

Lois, this is no time for idle feminine curiosity.

Your fortune's at stake, remember?

Perhaps you'd like me to sit down and gossip...

Never mind, never mind. I'm sorry I brought up the subject.

I'm very glad to hear it. Please call Inspector Henderson,

tell him to get over there

with a couple of his best men. Right.

Get me Inspector Henderson, please.

[♪♪♪]

Man, what a patsy that Mr. Zero is.

You don't find them like that every day in the week.

You can say that again.

Boy, I can hardly wait to start counting this loot.

[♪♪♪]

And to think, we didn't even have to point a gun.

Unarmed robbery.

[BOTH LAUGH]

A million dollar" worth.

Ooh, you gorgeous money...

[IN UNISON] Superman!

We didn't mean nothing, honest.

I know, just a couple of nice boys out for a lark.

What are you gonna do to us, Superman?

I'm not going to do a thing.

However, I'd like you to meet an associate of mine.

Come in, Zero-Zero-Zero-Minus-One.

This job is much too big for Superman. Take over.

Gladly, Superman.

SUPERMAN: That should hold them

until Inspector Henderson gets here.

Mr. Zero, you really saved the day.

I did, didn't I? Sure you did.

Look what Zero-Zero-Zero-Minus-One

is doing down there on Earth.

He's helping Superman, and he's only

4-feet-1 and three-quarter inches tall, imagine.

And then Superman asked me to meet Mr. Kent,

Miss Lane and Jimmy back here.

He said that you'd want to meet me.

Yes, of course, I wouldn't have believed it otherwise.

Have a cigar.

Thank you.

Aren't you afraid it'll stunt his growth?

This is very superior.

Good. I'm glad you like it.

I'll give you a box of them later.

Back home we smoke corn silk.

PERRY: Corn silk?

[ELECTRONIC BEEPING]

What is it, Mr. Zero?

This is the antenna from my helmet.

They're sending me a message.

What kind of a message?

From Mars. From the Supreme Council.

They say if I'm good enough for Superman,

I'm good enough for them.

They're sending a rocket ship for me.

You're going home?

Golly, that's great. What a story!

We can drive you to where they're gonna pick ya up,

and I'll get some pictures and Miss Lane, you can...

Uh, Jimmy, obviously Mr. Zero doesn't want to say this,

but he's afraid if there are people around

when the rocket ship approaches

his friends may be frightened away.

That's right, Mr. Kent.

Oh, of course.

We'll take you to the meeting place and leave you there.

Sure. Thank you.

Goodbye, Mr. Kent, Mr. White.

Goodbye.

You realize, of course,

that the people in Washington are never going to believe this.

I suppose not, chief. You obviously didn't.

Kent, I want to ask you a question.

Yes, sir.

I have here, scissors, paper and paper clips.

Yes?

Just how do you go about making those paper helicopters?

[LAUGHS]

Chief, I thought you'd never ask me. It's very simple.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

NARRATOR: Don't miss the next thrill-packed episode

in the amazing Adventures of Superman.

Superman is based on the original character

appearing in Superman magazine.

[♪♪♪]