Original subtitles

- And moving on to our novel study of "Call of the Wild,"

can anyone tell me what kind of dog is Buck?

Dawn, what kind of dog is Buck?

- Actually, I'm more of a cat person.

[laughter]

- Well, seeing you're such a smart aleck,

why don't you tell us what "Call of the Wild" is about?

- Well, nobody calls anymore, just texts.

[school bell rings] - All righty then.

Don't forget to read chapter two,

whether you like cats, dogs, or hamsters.

And, oh, here are last week's quizzes.

Excellent as always.

Got to call your mom.

Evan--yeah.

And Dawn.

You might have done better if you left it blank.

Nicely done.

And, oh, hmm.

Well done, Julie.

Looks like even Grade 8 English might not be

enough of a challenge for you.

- Thanks, Mr. Liu.

- You got an A?

- A plus, but it's in the A family.

I love reading, historical fiction in particular.

- That's really cool.

We should hang some time.

- We should?

[apprehensive music]

- Are you serious?

The Dawn asked you to hang out?

What did you say?

- We should.

- Confident.

- It was more like a question, like, we should?

- Julie, this is huge.

They're in Grade 8.

They're practically celebrities.

And they're not just any Grade 8s,

they're Dawn and the Glossip Girls.

[rock music]

They are the Beyonc�s of middle school,

every single one of them--

Evan, Portia, and Dawn.

[smooch]

- Where's that wind coming from?

I mean, I get that they're a big deal, but--

- They're just so fierce and fabulous.

Take Dawn, pack leader.

Rumor has it she was born at the Met Gala.

[camera shutters snapping]

Evan--Evan is Dawn's Julie.

- Or Dawn's Lydia?

- Either way, he's a huge sneaker head.

Those in the know say he's never worn

the same pair twice.

And Portia, the glam silent Glossip.

- I don't think I've ever heard her voice.

- I heard she imports her gum from Dubai.

- Why? - Because it's cool.

Julie, honestly.

And they all wear lip gloss, hence the Glossip Girls.

Oh, wow, Dawn's waving.

Do you know what this means?

- She's saying hi?

- First she asks you to hang out,

now she's acknowledging we're alive?

This is our chance to become Glossip Girls.

- I think you're getting way ahead of yours--

- Just be cool.

Just be cool.

[whispering] Hi.

[chuckles]

[upbeat music]

- Oh, yeah

All right

Oh, yeah

- Will being part of the Glossip Girls

make us the most popular girls in school?

I mean, look at them.

They're always color coordinated,

and they're the only kids in school

allowed to wear lip gloss.

- Okay, but they're only three people.

- Yeah, and there's only two of us.

Three is greater than two.

It's just math.

Power in numbers, Jules.

I mean, do they send one person to space,

or do they send a crew?

- There was that one movie with Sandra Bullock alone in space.

It seemed nice.

- Not the takeaway.

I mean, look at the Blue Man Group.

With just one person, you're just one weirdo in blue.

But add more people,

and you're an award-winning theater troupe.

See? Groups are always better.

- Performance art is highly subjective.

So is popularity.

And popularity is really just a social construct

that we need to be actively destroy--

- Here's the plan.

- Science is trial and error.

So I guess we give it a shot? - Yeah.

Don't worry.

When has science ever gone wrong?

[school bell rings]

- Hey Julie, sit with us.

Move.

You're in Julie's seat.

- Oh, hey.

Thanks, and sorry.

- Glossip Girls don't apologize, Julie.

- Oh, I'm sorry. Oh.

- She's not.

Julie, you look parched.

She's parched.

- A window seat--

very nice.

- Cucumber water?

- Okay, class, continuing our novel discussion,

can anyone tell me what begins to happen to Buck

as he becomes a sled dog?

Julie?

- He begins to tap into his natural instinct,

shedding his former domesticity.

- Because in the harsh realities of the wild,

survival is paramount.

It's either kill or be killed.

Excellent, Julie.

Well done.

- You're, like, so smart.

- Facts.

- As Julie so eloquently stated,

the major theme of this novel is civilization

versus the wilderness.

Tonight, you'll write a paragraph

exploring this idea,

preferably without emojis this time.

Now, let's talk about Buck.

- Hey, so you know that coffee shop down the street?

- Yeah.

- We hang there.

Come chill with us after school.

- Uh, okay.

- Something he couldn't imagine doing in his former life.

- Okay, don't freak out, but the Glossip Girls

want me to chill at the coffee shop after school.

I mean, it's just a coffee shop.

People have been drinking coffee since 800 A.D.

It's not that big of a deal, right?

- Totally.

This is the biggest deal of all deals that ever dealt.

This is our chance to show them that we're cool enough

to be Glossip Girl material.

- Right.

One problem-- we're not cool enough.

- Not with that attitude.

We just need to impress them with our deep knowledge

of things that grade 8s care about.

Like, um--

- Podcasts?

- Yes, good one.

Then I'll impress them with my knack

for extremely effective mnemonic devices.

And you can show them how you can hiccup on command.

- [hiccups] - See?

Now we just need to pick out cute outfits

that say "Beyonc�s of middle school."

- [hiccups]

- Hey, Julie.

Have a seat.

- Is there an extra chair?

That's cool.

I'll just--

yeah.

- Hey.

- Hey. [chuckles awkwardly]

- So, what's up?

- Chillin'.

- How's your chill going?

Is it chillified?

Chillarific? Chillnoble?

No? Okay.

Mmm, coffee, am I right?

Like I always say, I like my coffee like I like my friends,

strong and valued in the workplace.

- What?

- I'm going to go get us some snacks.

- [sighs] Hey, Julie, have you finished

that English homework for tomorrow?

- Oh, the one about civilization versus--

- Yeah, that one.

Listen, I'm having a little trouble with my paragraph.

Could we take a look at yours?

- Sure.

Do you want to compare answers, or--

- Uh, no. I'm good, thanks.

Well, we've got to bounce.

- Later, Julie. - Yeah, us too.

We're bouncing.

- I think that went well.

[school bell rings]

- I see a lot of improvement in this assignment.

I can't believe it, but good work, Dawn.

And Evan and Portia, also well done.

- Thanks.

- Thanks, Mr. Liu.

We worked really hard.

- As we move on to our next novel study,

we'll be comparing and contrasting--

- Hey, Julie, what are you doing back there?

Come sit with us.

- So be sure to hang on to these paragraphs

for reference.

- Does anyone ever call you Julia?

- No, because it's Julie.

- Sounds better as Julia.

- It does.

Here's the deal, Julia, we'd love for you

to hang out with us again. It was fun.

Right, Portia?

- Great. I'll tell Lydia.

- Oh, actually, this time, don't bring your friend.

Okay? - Eh, huh.

- How was it? How are they?

Did they say anything about me?

- There's good news, and there's bad news.

The good news is, they mentioned you.

- Oh, my goodness, they talked about me?

We are so in, Jules! What's the bad news?

- They specifically said they didn't want

to hang out with you.

- Oh.

- They want to hang out with just me.

- That's okay. Even better, actually.

Every experiment needs a control, right?

I'll just be the control.

- I don't think I'd fit in.

They make some poor kid slice fresh cucumbers

for their water every morning.

- Well, you need to drink at least eight glasses a day.

Julie, this is a real chance at becoming popular.

- But I don't want to be popular without you.

- You must, for the greater good.

Think of the influence you'll have.

The experiment needs you to suck it up

and accept the perks that come with being popular, Julie.

- You're right.

If I become a Glossip Girl, I could set the tone

for how popularity should be.

- Whatever it takes, Julie.

Go on and become a Glossip Girl.

For me.

For science.

Whatever it takes.

- Hey, thanks for helping us out with that homework.

It was really cool of you.

- I didn't know I was doing it, but you're welcome?

- I really love your overalls.

The '90s is totally back.

- Thanks.

- I've been working on some '90s dance moves.

Check out the running man.

- Running person.

- If only the '90s were as inclusive.

[laughing]

- Enough.

Julia, we brought you here today

because we see something in you.

We think you could be a Glossip Girl.

But first, you have to pass the background test.

[pops gum]

- Uh, I'm very good at being in the background.

[tense music]

- Do you have a crush on anyone?

- No.

- What about that Greek guy you hang around with?

What's his name, Zeus?

- Dimitri?

- That's what I said.

Do you like him?

Have you ever kissed him?

- No, we're just friends.

Boys and girls can be platonic friends.

- No, they can't.

- I'm right here, Dawn. - [sighs]

What about that band kid, Spit Valve?

Ever kiss him?

- Also just friends.

- What about that friend you brought in yesterday?

Ever kiss her?

- Lydia? - Is that her name?

Chuck's little brother always calls her Goldbladder.

What's that about?

- There was an incident when we were kids.

He's never let her forget about it.

Honestly, if he knew the real situation behind it,

he'd feel awful.

- What's the real situation?

What's the real deal behind Goldbladder?

- Goldbladder!

- Ugh, what do you want, Mike?

Don't you have some math test to flunk?

- [giggling]

- What are you laughing at, Dweeby Phoebe?

- Why don't you make like my uncle

during his midlife crisis and hit the road?

- Whatever.

- Wow, Lydia, you scared Mike off.

That was incredible.

Do you think you could walk me home, you know,

just in case he comes back?

- For sure.

- Guys, she said she would walk us home.

- Us?

[bright music]

Power in numbers--good.

Let's walk home.

- I don't know if I should tell you.

- Fine.

- Okay, the truth is,

Lydia's parents potty trained her

to "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star."

- Really?

- Now Lydia can't hear that song without having to pee.

- Tinkle, tinkle-- that poor little star.

- Yeah.

- That is so juicy.

- Please don't spread it around.

- Oh, Julia, I would never weaponize

any information like that, no matter how delicious it is.

- Huh?

- I have good news for you.

You passed. - OMG.

Congrats.

- There's just one thing left to do

before you're officially a part of the squad.

We could really use your help with the English test tomorrow.

- Sure.

What chapter do you want to review?

- Well, actually, we were thinking less study

and more working together.

- Like quizzing each other?

- No Julie, come on.

I don't want to say the C-word out loud.

- Cooperation?

- Cheat.

- I've never cheated before.

- Well, you won't be cheating.

We will.

And it's barely cheating.

All you have to do is let me sit next to you

and copy off your test.

Easy.

[tense music]

- So how did it go without me?

- It was awful.

- You don't have to lie just to make me feel better.

- They want to cheat on our English test.

- I've actually been thinking about starting my own squad.

- Lydia, did you hear what I said?

They want to cheat off my test.

- That's not cool.

- I've never done anything wrong in my life.

I've never even brought a library book back late.

- But if you don't, then they won't make you a Glossip Girl.

Sometimes the ends justify the means, Jules.

- From what I've seen, there's nothing fun

about being part of the Glossip Girls.

I don't know why anyone would want to be popular

if they knew what it was really like.

- Well, the scientific method can be uncomfortable.

Take Daniel Alcides Carri�n, for example.

- Who's that?

- He was a medical student in the 1800s

who injected himself with infectious diseases

to help find a cure.

- And what happened to him?

- He saved a bunch of people,

and there's a disease named after him.

- Oh.

- But of course, he died.

A pretty gruesome death, actually.

See, popularity is saving lives.

- Yeah.

[upbeat music]

[school bell rings]

- Well done, Julia.

Meet us after class at the main entrance.

That was super cool of you to help us out with the test.

You've proved yourself worthy.

Julia Graham-Chang, with this lip gloss,

we grant you official membership

in the Glossip Girls.

[cheers and applause]

- I just need to check the ingredients first,

uh, make sure I'm not allergic.

- What are you allergic to?

- Moral compromise?

- Yeah, that's not in there.

[cheers and applause]

- It's all happening, Julie. You got a gloss!

- Who cares about the lip gloss

or the glossified clothes, Lydia?

I'm an accessory to a crime.

What if I go to jail?

My dads will be so mad at me if I go to jail.

- Just hang in there.

We're halfway through the experiment.

Just think about how much you've learned already.

- That the Glossip Girls are morally bankrupt

and cheat on tests?

- See, that's great data.

We can compile the rest of your findings over lunch.

- That's the problem.

I can't sit with you at lunch.

Glossip Girls only sit with Glossip Girls.

It's in their handbook.

- We can't sit together?

But we always eat lunch together.

You know what, I respect that.

Maybe I should have my own exclusive

seating arrangement for my squad too.

Did I tell you I have my own squad?

- No. - Fibs.

- Oh, hi. Nice to meet you.

Any friend of Lydia's is a friend of mine--

I hope--if you'll have me.

- Isn't that your bag, Lydia?

- I'm happy to carry it.

It's the least I could do for Lydia.

She offers us protection.

- Like a mob boss?

- Okay, Pheebs, write this down.

So we're going to need a handbook,

and then rules to put in said handbook.

- You got it, boss.

- Please don't call her that.

- Don? Capo? Godfath--

- What are you doing?

It's lunchtime.

- Oh, right behind you.

- Can we eat lunch too?

- [sighs]

- I'm the one that makes you crazy

What awaits you, what awaits you

- Who was that you were talking to?

- Oh, my friend Lydia and her squad.

- Who?

- You literally met her two days ago at the coffee shop.

- Not ringing any bells.

- Hey, look out.

[music winds down]

- We might not be the most coordinated,

but we are a squad.

And we're weird and interesting.

And we're claiming our power.

We are the Lip Balms.

- Yeah!

[cheers and applause]

[soft music]

- Sometimes you have to give something up

to be part of the popular group.

It's worth it, right?

What would you rate this experiment?

8 lip balms out of 10?

That's what I was going to say.

Because being part of a group makes you feel less alone.

Right, Julie?

[upbeat music]

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