Original subtitles

- Ah, the stage,

where all my dreams come true.

- And all of my fears.

- Well, time to warm up my instrument.

[exhales]

[sings scales]

- Oh, fun!

[sings scales]

- [sings scales]

- You're down here, it's up here

[sings scales a bit higher]

- [sings scales]

- [sings scales a bit higher]

Oh, we're done now? OK. That was great.

- Really? It sounded like a dying hyena.

- Mike, at least I don't look like a Slytherin reject.

- Oh, har-har, Goldbladder.

- Your voice is really coming along.

Maybe you'll get a solo this year.

- [chuckles] Not if you get it first.

[quietly] She's the worst!

- So she beat you out for Elsa in the school play.

It's not that big of a deal.

- Julie, all theater rejections burn till the end of time.

That's why I need to make a good first impression

on this new drama teacher

and prove that I'm solely focused on the stage.

- I'm Ms. Fielding. [students groan]

- Jeez. Dramatic.

Can't take it, huh?

You may recognize me from gym class

or as a Manatee Field Hockey alum.

Unfortunately, your drama teacher, Ms. Stone,

left to write a book on teaching called "Quit It,"

so I'm filling in.

Your first drill is to present a scene

from this incredible movie

from the magic of cinema.

Dig in. - "The Boxer"?

- A 1983 classic about a down-on-their-luck boxer

who, spoiler alert, wins the big fight, all right?

The student with the best performance

gets to do a monologue at the next assembly.

- Performing a monologue at the next assembly?

This is our one-way ticket to popularity.

There's only one thing in my way,

the greatest ruiner who could ever ruin,

Sage.

- You know, getting fixated on your rival

and not rehearsing could also ruin your shot?

- [firmly] Sage.

- OK, shush. She might hear you.

- [whispers] Sage.

[energetic music]

- Oh, yeah

- Uh, what are you looking for?

- I'm looking for my comedy-tragedy necklace.

It's my lucky charm.

I lost it right before I bombed the audition for Hermione.

And I've been losing ever since.

I'll need it for our experiment.

Will being an actor make you--

well, me--

popular?

Julie, get ready for my close-up.

- Uh, you have spinach in your teeth.

- Case study, Sage Kennedy.

Sage landed all of the lead roles in elementary school

and that catapulted her to the top of

the popularity food chain.

[groans] Sage is not that big of a deal.

- Lyd?

Lyd. Lyd!

- Oh. Oops.

- Sage is definitely popular.

Look at how many followers she has.

- Hey, guys. It's Sage.

Today we're gonna be talking about eyebrow acting.

There's so much you can do with your eyebrows.

Say you're surprised, or happy,

or sad, or mad.

- Who would watch this garbage?

- Uh, 2,030 people.

- What does she have that I don't?

- Clean teeth, for one.

- It's still there? Ugh.

- Also, a four-octave range, a decade of ballet,

and a Young Artist Award-- - Or...

my lucky charm.

Sage stole my necklace,

and by association, my leading parts.

- Lydia. - Nice necklace.

Where'd you get it? It's so unique.

- New York. It's my absolute fave.

- Mine too.

Did you hear her web of lies?

- Maybe she's telling the truth.

- Oh, yeah,

and I'm Academy Award-winning actress Laura Dern.

Here's the plan.

Step one, get my necklace back from that hack.

Step two, win the monologue contest

and perform at the next assembly.

Step three, become mega Hollywood stars.

- Seems reasonable.

One problem, though.

How are you gonna get the necklace back from Sage?

[whistle blasts] - All right, team.

I want you to, uh, pair up and rehearse your scenes, OK?

- Same old? You play both leads and read the stage directions?

Lydia? Lydia.

No, you're not thinking of Sage.

We've been partners since kindergarten.

It's the third vow of best friendship.

You can't leave me here-- [sighs]

That kid picks his nose.

Pyro kid is not an option.

And worst of all? Mike.

- Do you see it? Should we do "Rear Window"?

- Fourth vow of best friendship,

forgiveness is key. Sorry! - No, no, no!

- Sage, do you want to be my partner?

- Sure.

- [exhales] New partner.

Hey.

[chuckles]

Hey, you.

Uh, what's your position on fire and masks?

- For outside, and for faces.

- This is promising.

Want to be partners? - Sure.

- Lydia, I presume?

Sage will be right down.

It's a pleasure to meet a fellow thespian.

Please, come in, come in.

- Whoa. - Yeah, that's me there.

- What is all this? - That's Sagey.

Oh. [chuckles]

My latest inhabitation. - Wow, "Hamlet."

- Yeah, I play his cousin.

I play his second cousin, who is also important.

Oh, I have tickets.

- I'll ask my mom.

- Sounds great. I've got lots of them.

- Oh, you're here.

I was just uploading my new video.

- If you're not posting--

both: You're ghosting. [laughter]

- The kids say it. - Let's go rehearse in my room.

Oh, I'm so glad we're partners.

An actor is only as good as her supporting actor.

[squeals]

- "Supporting."

- I made you a copy of the scene

and highlighted your part.

- Oh, thanks.

You always hear those stories about group projects

where one person does nothing

and then takes all the credit,

or they wand your personal possessions?

[wand screeching] - Shh!

- Whoa.

Those are my house keys!

- You can never be too careful...

[quietly] Because they're listening.

- Who's "they"?

- The teachers. They're surveilling us.

They record our every movement, track our every performance.

- You mean, attendance and report cards?

- Wake up, Julie.

That's what they want you to think.

- You know, as I read these scenes,

I can almost hear the young boxer

as if she's played by-- both: Zendaya.

- And the older boxer seems like a role for--

both: Katharine Hepburn. [both gasp]

- Did we just mind meld?

- This is why I like hanging out with you, Lydia.

You get all of the references that none of the cool kids get.

- Thanks.

Sage is not your friend, she's competition.

With her impeccable teeth, perfect hair,

and her pitch-perfect voice.

Take those away and what's she got left?

Huh. She looks familiar.

The only thing she's got going for her is my lucky necklace.

Wait a sec. She's not wearing it.

Four Dark Thirty is upon us. It's go time.

Hey, Sage.

Would you mind getting me a glass of water,

or, like, a cup of tea? Whichever takes longer?

- Of course. Can't be using your voice

if you're not juicing your voice.

Ugh. Does your acting coach tell you that all the time too?

[tense music]

- I mean, who knows how long they could be tracking us for?

It could go all the way back to elementary school.

- There's no conspiracy, Ursula.

- Then why is there a secret lab

where they perform experiments on kids?

- Secret lab? Our school can barely afford a regular lab.

- Tomorrow, we'll find the lab, and you'll see the truth.

- If I agree, will you be less scary and work on the scene?

- If you're not scared, you're not paying attention.

But yes.

- [sighs]

[sneaky music]

[cheers and applause]

- I'd like to thank the Academy.

This truly is so unexpected,

to be called the most talented actor of all time.

- What are you doing?

- I was just, uh, checking out your camera.

Anyway, is this where you film your videos?

I'm...such a fan.

- I had no idea, Lydia.

We should totally film our scenes

and post it on my profile.

- [giggles uncomfortably] Yay.

- You go in there, it'll be your last fight.

- Listen, kid, I've been boxing longer

than you've been alive.

You might knock me out,

but you will never keep me down.

- Cut.

OK.

Um, let's do it again. All right?

Just like that, but not terrible.

- My dad helps with all my acting stuff.

- Yeah, 90% dad, 10% manager.

15% on bigger deals. [chuckles]

I'm her dad-ager. - That's totally normal.

- OK, girls, let's take it from ones.

And, Lydia, this time, try it with more--

just be like Sage. - OK.

[soft tense music]

- You might knock me out, but you'll never--

- I don't believe you!

- You might knock me out--

- Again.

Action.

- You might knock me out--

- Take it from the top.

And cut.

No. No.

Your left nostril is flaring.

You know what? Let's, uh, cut. Let's call it a day.

I think we got-- we got enough there, OK?

Uh, should we take a look at the dailies?

Huh?

See if there's anything we can do

about that nostril in editing?

I don't think so, but--

- He's tough, but so inspirational, right?

- [sighs] Target acquired.

- Nice gym bag.

Ursula confiscated my backpack.

Lydia, she thinks teachers are doing experiments

on kids in a secret lab.

I hope this was worth it.

- Like taking candy from a well-guarded baby.

- Why are you refreshing Sage's page?

- We shot a video of our scene. - You're having fun

while I was making tin foil hats with Ursula?

- The fun was all part of the ruse.

Oh, she posted our video.

- You go in there, and it'll be your last fight.

Listen, kid, I've been boxing

longer than you've been alive.

You may knock me out,

but you will never keep me down.

Scene.

- Sage recast me?

How could she do this?

I'd never do that to her.

- Yeah, you'd just infiltrate her home and steal from her.

- It's not stealing.

It's taking back what was mine.

Just like I'm gonna take this monologue.

[whistle blasts]

- Hustle up, everyone.

It's the championships. I want you to find your team.

Best performance wins.

- Ready for the big showdown? - Break a leg.

That's what they say-- - I know what that means.

- We have 10 minutes until we have to present.

- It's go time.

- I am not wearing this.

[funky sneaky music]

Why am I doing this?

[groans]

This is even more boring than I imagined.

- [sighs] - Can we go now?

- Aha! What do we have here?

- It's probably for the lost and found.

- It may look like a bunny,

but it could have an alarm system,

or a magnetic pulse device, or...

a surveillance camera.

Still think there's nothing going on?

- I thought you were just being paranoid.

- Paranoid is a word invented

to gaslight the fully conscious!

Anyway, the bunny is security for the secret lab,

which means...

it's over here.

[suspenseful music]

- Ursula Gil and Julie Graham-Chang,

report to the principal's office.

Now.

[applause]

- Creative choice just miming that full scene.

Almost like you didn't learn the lines.

OK, take a seat.

Lydia, Sage? You're up.

[blows whistle] Go on. Let's move.

Move it, move it, move it!

And hut!

I mean, um, "action."

- I gotta fight.

Not for the money or the glory,

but for the fight.

- Wow.

- [in british accent] You go in that ring,

and it'll be your last fight.

[students gasp] - A British accent?

You can judge a good actor

just by the way they do accents.

- [in australian accent] Listen, kid--no, that's Aussie.

Listen--no, never mind.

[normally] Listen, kid, I've been boxing longer

than you've been alive.

You might knock me out, but you'll never keep me down!

- This is better than the movie.

- [chuckles softly]

[somber music]

- [in british accent] I guess...this is goodbye.

You weren't my hero to start,

but you sure are my hero now.

- Oh!

[cheers and applause]

Real tears!

Those are real tears!

Take note. I know I am.

Wow.

That was something else.

This is a cool class.

- Do you two want to tell me why you're out of class?

And dressed like that?

- We are not the villains here, Principal Larocque.

If that's even your real name.

- Well, my first name isn't Principle, so--

- We know about the secret lab.

What do you have to say for yourself?

- This is ridiculous. There's no lab.

- I will prove it!

And once I do, you're going to jail.

[door opens]

May we be dismissed to prove it?

Also, can you come unlock the staff room door?

There it is.

- My bunny!

What did you monsters do? - Forget the bunny.

- What's the camera for, Larocque?

What's the camera for? - OK, OK.

There's a camera in the bunny. It's for the fridge!

I'm trying to catch a thief.

One of the staff has been eating my hard-boiled eggs!

- Who does that? - I know, right?

- No, I mean, who eats a plain, hard-boiled egg?

- Lots of people. - Wait.

If you weren't spying on us,

how did you know where we were?

- Ms. Fielding said you didn't return to class.

- Oh.

- Girls, I appreciate your imaginations,

but skipping class and slandering Mapleview,

that's not OK.

both: Sorry, Principal Larocque.

- Now get back to class.

You can think about your accusations in detention.

[both sigh]

One more thing.

If you see Ms. Fielding,

mention eggs and watch her reaction.

[soft music]

- [groans]

- [muffled crying]

[knocking]

- Lydia. Hi.

Uh, I just get so into the role,

it's hard to turn off.

- Oh, me too.

Are you sure you're OK?

- [sighs] I lost my necklace.

I know it's silly to be freaking out over a necklace.

- It's childish, but I won't judge.

- It's just that...

my parents bought it for me.

We went to New York to see "Les Mis," and...

it was our last family trip.

They got divorced over the summer.

- Oh. I didn't know that.

My parents are divorced too.

- My dad didn't take it well.

The only time I really see him happy is when he's dad-aging.

It's just so exhausting always making videos

and auditioning and-- [sighs]

I'm so jealous of what you did today.

You just go for it.

You don't even care if you're good.

Being partners with you has been some of the most fun

I've had in a long time.

You make it fun. - I do?

Thanks, Sage.

- [sniffles]

Who needs a lucky necklace when I've got friends like you?

- Right. That.

[sneaky music]

[takes deep breath] Sage needs you more than I do.

She's a little desperate.

[door creaks] Oh, no!

[dramatic music swelling] - Oh, thank you.

Please. Please sit down, please.

Thank you. Thank you so much.

Thank you to the Academy, uh, to my daughter,

who thinks her daddy's a superstar,

and to my wife, to my ex-wife--

I'm still getting used to that--

to my ex-wife, I told you I'd make it.

- [sneezes] - [screams]

[sobbing] Please take everything but the trophy.

- [chuckles]

Congrats. That was a beautiful speech.

[applauds softly]

- What are you doing here?

How'd you get in here?

Is Sagey-Pie in here with you?

I mean, she should be in her Meisner technique class.

- Why is Sage in class so much anyway?

- Oh, 'cause my Sage loves to perform.

- Sage needs a break.

She's not having fun anymore.

She shouldn't have to worry about her dad's feedback.

- I rarely have notes for Sage.

You, on the other hand-- - She's having a tough time!

Actually, she thinks you both are.

She's just too scared to tell you.

- I thought I was helping Sage.

I thought that if I couldn't give her the perfect family,

that at least I'd be able to help her fulfill her dreams.

I had no idea how hard this was all on her.

Thank you, Lydia.

You should use this in your acting.

Might spark something, no?

- What's that? - Oh, this?

It contains enough nutrients to make it through an apocalypse.

- [sniffs]

The living would envy the dead. [chuckles]

- Look, I'm really sorry, Julie.

I may have gotten a little carried away.

OK, I got very carried away.

I never should have believed that weird blog.

- I get it.

Conspiracy theories are fun until you wind up in detention.

- Yeah.

And even though we got in trouble,

I had a really good time solving the mystery with you.

I don't have many friends,

or any,

unless you count that Sasquatch who runs the blog.

- How about this?

Next time you find yourself falling into this rabbit hole,

give me a call.

Until then, don't eat that.

Here. [chain clinks softly]

A toast to new friends,

however odd they may be.

- Thanks, Julie.

You are pretty odd, but that's cool.

Also, you dropped something. - Oh, thanks.

- [exhales]

Uh-oh.

- We are here today--

- Would I be the worst friend in the world

to admit Sage got some chops?

- What, the whole crying bit? Overrated.

It's all in the subtlety of the performance.

I guess I'll just have to beat her

without my lucky necklace.

- Heh.

Since we're talking necklaces...

it was in my gym bag all along.

- Julie, it's been missing for months!

How did you not notice?

- Does it look like I regularly use my gym bag?

Anyway, what did we learn from this experiment?

- [in british accent] That British accents

make you popular...

[normally] And sometimes you can find a friend

where you least expect it, like in a washroom.

- Or while dissecting a stuffed animal.

- Huh? - Never mind.

What would you rate it?

- I give it four tragedy faces

and three comedy faces out of 10.

[energetic music]

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