Original subtitles

In the beginning,

before the Six Singularities and the dawn of creation,

came the Celestials.

Now, with the power of the Eternal Guardians flowing through me,

let the power of creation bring forth my rebirth!

My rebirth! My rebirth!

Okay, well, that's not working. Howard?

And cut!

Okay, let's reset. We'll do it one more time.

In this universe, Agatha Harkness' quest for power led her

to discover the Celestial growing deep within the Earth.

Looking to take its cosmic energy for herself,

she set out to design a spell to siphon its power.

But pulling off a ritual of that scale would require an equally big production.

So, she turned to a blossoming industry that had built its reputation

financing the big dreams of even bigger egos.

Hollywood.

Where upstart mogul, Howard Stark, was happy to foot the bill.

Agatha, darling, those in-camera effects, I still don't know how you do it!

Just a little bit of "movie magic."

But it's not working. This spell is just not working!

In the scene, that is. We may need to, uh, re-stage.

Fantastic! That's lunch, everyone.

Now, where's my AD? Jarvis? Jarvis!

Don't tell me. Not more new pages.

We have already re-shot the Third Act set piece five times.

And we'll shoot it a hundred more, if that's what it takes!

To add what? Another mind-numbing action spectacle?

Big fights? Bigger explosions? I think we've seen it.

- You know, you're right. - I am?

- He is? - We need to expand this picture

to give it that oomph I'm missing.

We need more star power.

- A co-star! - How can I steal the show

when there's no one to steal it from.

Of course! The Capulets had the Montagues. The Hatfields, the McCoys.

My auntie had the recluse in the apartment upstairs.

You need a foil! A perfectly placed grain of salt

to complement the seasonings simmering in the pan!

Anything but more actors.

I can see it now. Our Cosmic Queen is sitting on a hand no one else can beat.

That is, until a mysterious new player blows into town,

hot on her lofty ambitions.

Yes, yes. Do they fight? Do they fall in love?

No, they'll dance. With dozens of backup dancers on each side.

And we'll lift the lighting rig so the sets can be three times as tall.

- Yes! - Wait. No. No, no.

Jarvis! It's about time you caught the creative bug.

- I wasn't... - That is just genius.

- It's a disaster. - Who we thinking?

Bogie? Gable? Cary Grant does owe me a favor.

No, no, there's only one actor on Earth who can complete our picture.

I thought I could do it without him, but now I see.

I need him.

Kingo.

Time.

Space.

Reality.

It's more than a linear path.

It's a prism of endless possibility.

Where a single choice can branch out into infinite realities,

creating alternate worlds from the ones you know.

I am the Watcher.

I am your guide through these vast new realities.

Follow me and ponder the question...

"What if?"

Mr. Kingo.

I'm Edwin Jarvis, Mr. Stark's personal butler and second AD.

Welcome to Stark Pictures.

Wow!

And I thought we did things over-the-top in Bollywood.

I've always been partial to the axiom that "less is more."

But for Mr. Stark...

More is just the opening offer.

Kingo, it's an honor to have you onboard.

Now, this number we've put together is off the charts. Literally.

I've got enough dancers in there to light up a Richter scale.

You ready to cross steps with our leading lady?

Howard, something tells me this is a part I was born to play.

The lights are hot, cameras loaded,

and safeties removed from all our pyrotechnics!

What? I'm sorry, what?

Is there anything else you need?

- I'm more than ready. - What about the choreography?

- Was it up to snuff? - Yes. The moves are great,

but I assume there's room for a little improvisation?

Absolutely! Absolutely! Kingo, I'll be honest with you.

This one's gonna be a doozy. A real barn burner.

The biggest scene ever captured on celluloid.

Don't worry, Howard.

I've been preparing for our showdown for quite some time.

Okay, people! This is it. Our big musical number.

I want glitz. I want glamour.

I want emotion! I want commotion!

I want you to wow me with your razzle-dazzle.

I want Busby Berkeley to see this and contemplate becoming a realtor!

Quiet on set!

Lights!

Camera!

TR 62, take one.

And...

action!

The challenge has been made. Will our Cosmic Queen heed the call?

Move in, Camera A.

She answers!

There she is.

There he is.

It's all led up to this.

The final Eternal champion arrives at the zero hour,

in a last, desperate bid to stay the queen's cosmic hand!

Will she defeat him? Will he defeat her?

Will they dance?

They will!

You're the missing piece I've been waiting lifetimes for.

Oh, I know. But I'm here to put your vanity project

into turnaround.

So, you "know" know.

And you still had the stones to show up.

Someone needs to stop you.

Oh, honey, I'm just out here making blockbusters.

You and the Eternals are the ones who wanna destroy the world.

You have no idea what forces you're meddling with.

Right back at ya.

A little advice, one hoofer to another.

In this town?

Never mess with Number One on the Call Sheet.

Okay, Kingo. Make this look good!

Hot dog! That was out of this world!

Okay. Show's over.

Time to break out the big guns.

Oh, that's not in the script.

Is that in the script? Are these blue pages?

Shush, Jarvis! It's great! Keep shooting!

Uh, I'm sorry. Your powers are "finger pistols"?

Okay. No.

I fire energy. Projections.

Ah, right. From your fingers. Pew! Pew!

Okay. No... Stop with your hands. Stop!

Listen, these powers are cool.

A lot of people think these powers are very cool.

What? Those powers are Thena's!

And Makkari's and Gilgamesh's and everyone else's.

- Oh! - Yes!

Ah!

Yes!

Ow!

Whoa!

Oh!

And... cut!

Wowza! That chemistry was hotter than the Hindenburg!

I really believed you two wanted to kill each other.

Oh! No, no, no. We're just acting.

Totally just acting.

Both of us just acting so hard right now.

Oh, really? I'd say one of us is acting really bad right now.

This calls for a celebration! After-party! My place!

- Jarvis, give 'em the deets. - Fine.

Top of the hill, everybody. Just above the Hollywoodland sign.

It's the house that will make you question the decency of capitalism.

If you mean to kill me, be forewarned.

I know several heart-wrenching, dying monologues,

and I will regale you with them.

Oh, Kingo. You've pegged me as the villain of this picture,

but you've got it all wrong.

I'm the hero.

You killed my friends, stole their powers.

Relax. I didn't kill anyone. I "borrowed" their powers.

I assure you, your friends are all safe and sound in storage.

The backlot has a creature shop. They blend right in.

Agatha, release them.

Swear on the Oscar I plan to win, I will.

Once I have saved my world

from that Third Act surprise you've got brewing in the center of the Earth.

But...

And this is the hard part.

I can't do it without you, Kingo.

I need your energy to complete my spell, to save everything I know and love.

Arishem made me the new Prime Eternal.

I need to protect Tiamut

and the billions of lives his Emergence will create.

Sorry, scout, but I can see you reaching.

There's no way Arishem won you over

with some golden ball and top billing on a doomed planet.

You aren't like the other Eternals.

And what makes you say that?

Because you haven't just lived among humanity,

you have lived as them.

Oh!

Seeing the beauty, telling their stories

showing them who they really are as only an actor can.

Oh, that is true.

Acting is the most noble profession on Earth.

But do you really expect me to betray Arishem?

Forsake a mission I've dedicated eons to?

Never going to happen.

- Never. - I can get Howard to offer you

- a three-picture deal. - Okay, I'll do it.

Oh. I guess I should've led with that.

But I'm gonna need full green light approval,

and my own shingle on the lot.

Ooh. Plus, I've been looking to transition into indulgent, art house fair.

You know, no plot.

Abrupt, arbitrary cuts. Cut!

Me staring into camera with no expression on my face.

That last one sounds like a nightmare.

But for the literal sake of the world, I guess I'll allow it.

And you have to bring back my friends.

Very well. Let's get this show on the road.

Did you think I would not see your failure?

You have chosen your side.

And now, you will die on it.

Arishem is coming.

It would take the power of another Celestial to stop him.

Another Celestial.

Fasten your seat belt, honey.

It's time for my makeover.

Jarvis, this night's shaping up to be an instant classic.

Yes. I suppose if the relevant metric is "property damage."

Howard! Hi. You're still conscious. Can we chat?

Aggie! Kingo! About time!

Jarvis, bust out the grappa!

Sorry, Howard. No time for digestifs.

Still, maybe pour it anyway, though.

We had a bout of creative inspiration.

Is that some kinda euphemism? Are you two a thing now?

- Sorry. Not my type. - Sorry. Not my type.

But we do have chemistry.

And with Kingo's help, we've finally cracked the Third Act set piece.

Amazing! I'll check out the pages first thing...

No, no, no. We can't risk sitting on these creative juices.

We gotta shoot this finale...

- Now! - Right now!

Impossible. When Ms. Harkness opted to rewrite the Third Act,

for the sixth time, I might add, we broke down the sets.

"Broke down the..." What are you talking about?

Ugh, damn it!

You've no idea how many runes I had to paint by hand on those sets.

Come on. Think, think, think.

There's gotta be a cursed swamp, a haunted house, something we can use.

Bingo, baby! Griffith Observatory.

It should be big enough for all the runes.

We can shoot the finale there!

And with what dark magic do you expect me to pull permits at this hour?

For that kind of production value, I'll buy the joint.

Load up the limo, Jarvis! We're doin' a company move!

Actually, let's take our ride.

Oh, my...

An alien spaceship.

I gotta hand it to you, Aggie. You had me fooled.

- I thought you were a witch. - Yes.

- But he's the space alien. - Wait. What?

Technically, I'm more of a space robot.

You are?

Howard, you knew?

You knew?

I'm Howard Stark!

I'm the smartest person on Earth. Of course, I knew.

I also knew I'd save a hell of a lot of money

on special effects using actual magic.

Look, everyone in this town has a secret. It's what makes it interesting.

So, whatever's about to go down, I'm here for you. Just let me film it.

But once we save the day, I want a look under your hood.

I am sensing major patent potential.

Okay, y'all. Let's do it.

Okay. We've got five cameras set up for maximum coverage.

"A" Camera's gonna be trained on Agatha.

Um, I think you're gonna wanna swap out the lens for something... wider.

Jarvis!

Jarvis. Jarvis, please.

The line needs to be more confident.

This also needs a little touch-up, okay? Lean into the room's energy.

If you'll forgive me, Ms. Harkness.

We didn't do a lot of occult rituals when I trained at Balmoral.

Hey, sassy, I suggested we bring in the set dec team,

but you said we couldn't afford the overages.

So, now we're here with your lame energy.

Aggie?

Is that part of the opening act?

Arishem.

Okay. Then, places, people! It's showtime.

Not gonna lie, getting some ritual sacrifice vibes here.

You look great. Chin up! Chin up! That's it.

And start making space for that Oscar.

From the stars in the sky to the depths of the Earth.

Let the power of creation bring forth my rebirth!

Finally, your power will be mine!

Should we be concerned?

We'll be legends!

Oh, she is beautiful.

Are you getting this?

This is the greatest footage ever shot!

This is gold!

This power, it's... everything.

It's him. He's here.

It must feel strange

for such a primitive being

to suddenly possess a power so cosmic.

Oh, honey, cosmic is just my size. Haven't you seen the marquee?

I'm a star.

You are a heretic, Agatha Harkness.

And you will be judged as such.

Oh, yeah? Judge this. Boom!

Oh, boy! Cecil B. DeMille's gonna be pissed when he sees this footage.

Film it! Film it!

I'm filming it! I'm filming it! I'm filming it!

Howard, something tells me she's got the whole world watching.

Hah!

Yes!

Your vanity blinds you.

- Oh! - No!

A Celestial creates life.

It does not glorify its own existence.

When will you see?

You will always be too human to wield such power.

Oh, that's cute. You think I missed?

Truth is, I was just getting you to hit your mark.

What? How did you?

It's called acting, love.

And I'm afraid you are the next character I'm gonna become.

Humdinger. That's a showstopper.

Eddie, tell me you were in focus.

Yes, I think we've got it.

The angles!

Performance of a lifetime, Agatha.

I think that's a wrap.

Oh, Kingo. The show's not over yet.

Agatha, what are you doing?

With this power? Anything I damn well please.

But I thought...

That I wanted to save the world from the Emergence? Please.

I played the reluctant hero for a hot minute to get what I needed.

You.

Now,

kneel before me.

- Yes, my queen. - Oh, yes!

Savin' the big twist for the Third Act reel!

Howard, take it seriously.

With her magic and now the power of two Celestials,

she can destroy the whole world and remake it however she wants.

Surely, you've worked with difficult actors before.

Must be a way to get through to her.

I mean, all actors are difficult.

We're all sensitive 'cause we're opening up our souls, so the...

Jarvis, you're a genius.

Agatha, stop.

I would have thought you'd have realized by now

I'm not an actress who likes to take direction!

Now, kneel before me.

This isn't you.

You don't know me.

Of course, I do.

Because you're just like me,

and everyone else who came to this stupid town.

At some point, somewhere in our lives, the world made us feel small,

so we set out to show them.

But, Agatha, you never needed all this power.

Because you've always had the only magic you'd ever really needed

to leave your mark on the world.

Uh-huh, uh-huh.

And what magic is that?

The movies.

The movies are magic, Agatha.

Hell, they're better than magic.

Because they change the world by changing people.

By making them feel something real.

And with that kind of power, you don't have to be feared.

Because you can be adored.

You can't possibly understand how long I've worked for this.

Well, I've been on Earth for thousands of years, so I kinda do.

And if you're anything like me, maybe all this time,

you've just been looking for the right collaborator.

So, what do you say?

Wanna change the world? For real?

Reporting live from Hollywood,

where there's more stars on the red carpet than there are in the sky.

Over here. One more!

Mr. Stark! Mr. Stark! The trades are predicting a blockbuster.

What will it mean for your weapons biz?

Wars, my friend, are a thing of the past. Cinema is the future.

Kingo and I, we wanted to make a movie

that would, well... change the world.

And I think we did.

Some sparks flew, that's for sure.

Now, just wait for the sequel.

- Hey, Kingo! - Agatha!

That sequel could come sooner than you think.

Since you revived them,

Ajak and the other Eternals are pretty concerned

that killing Arishem has probably drawn the Celestials' attention.

Hah! Too bad for them. We thrive on attention.

Yeah, but this is the bad kind of attention.

Oh, darling, we can save that for the sequel.

Oh, my God! It looks so gorgeous!

This is so beautiful!

Everyone has a story worth telling.

Even two lost souls on the wrong path.

But sometimes, all it takes is a trip to the movies

to remind you that anything is possible.

Even a happy ending.

Then again, who doesn't love a cliffhanger?

And cut!