Original subtitles

We got three musical hobos riding free of charge. What do we do?

We'll throw 'em off! Come on!

♪ Come on, you hurdy gurdies And you birdies above ♪

♪ Tune in to my heart Full of m-u-s-i-c ♪

♪ Tune in - da da da da da da da Be be be be be de de ♪

♪ Tune in to the music of love Waaaaa! ♪

Hey hey! Fellas! Look out! Get out of here!

Get out of here! Hey wait. Don't do that! Don't do that!

Throw it out!

Hey! Hey! Hey! This don't belong to us!

Darn it, Ma. I've been walkin' around with this contraption between my legs now for 20 minutes.

Now it ain't my fault if I spent 20 years of my life in the saddle, and ain't bowlegged.

Can't help it, Pop. It's got to be done.

Jane says you gotta walk that way to convince these Easterners.

Oh, sometimes I wish the darn Easterners would stay to home!

If they did. I reckon we wouldn't be eatin'.

Here they come! Yep, here they come.

Yipee...

Everybody happy? Yeah!

Well, I reckon you folks better rest up a little ‘fore gittin' washed up fer supper?

Any suggestions from today's patrol leader?

At this time, I think that... Reckon...

I mean, I reckon...

we'd all like to have Jeff tell us that adorable little Indian story.

All right, it's your funeral. If you can stand it. I reckon I can.

I'll go git Jeff. Yahoo! Come on, boys and girls!

And a little Injun...

And another little Injun...

Only the little Injun was the big Injun's stepson.

Ma. What's the matter?

I forgit the sign for stepson. Look...

He ain't finished yet. Oh yes you are!

Come on, folks, now. All git ready for supper.

Okay, Louie, you first. One who gets the shortest match is to go up to the house and ask.

Don't grab. I'm second. You get the one that's left.

Guess I get the short one.

Yeah, I got it. Look Elly.

If they seem like nice people, well ask 'em and maybe we can stay all night in the barn.

Hey wait a minute, you guys! You're forgetting about me and animals!

And besides, don't you think it's imposing a little, asking for all that on top of grub?

Well then don't ask them. Just ask for something to eat.

Okay, but keep your fingers crossed- they haven't got any dogs up there.

Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!

What's the matter? Oh look! Look look!

Oh, that won't hurt you!

Come on.

Let me go! Let me go! All right.

Hey, mister.

Oh, I beg your pardon.

Howdy stranger. What can I do for you?

Well, I was just wondering if you could tell me where the next cafeteria is.

I mean, tell me where a fellow can get something to eat. Or maybe stay.

Well, I reckon your at that place right now. Where's your car?

Oh, thank you for the compliment. You see I'm walking to California.

You mean you're one of them hitchhikers? Well, I guess so. Yes, but...

Well, I'm willing to work for something to eat if you got a job around the place here.

Sorry, mister. I reckon you got the wrong place after all.

Haven't you got anything I can do? I can do most any kind of work.

We got all the help we need. 'Sides, we ain't runnin' no free chuck wagon.

We gave away vittles here last year and found out it didn't pay.

Yes, I guess you're right. Thank you.

Sorry I took up so much of your time.

Hey, stranger, come here.

You ain't no regular tramp, are you?

Oh, no, no, not exactly. Well, I've only been doing it since I left Council Bluffs.

On second glance, you don't look like most of these here hitchhikers.

Thank you. I don't really have to travel this way.

I was just thrown off... I - I - I just missed my train this morning and...

Must be fun, wearin' the same shirt every day.

Oh, I don't mind. It kind of goes on you.

Haven't you got any kind of job I could do around here? It's... it...

Is that yours?

I reckon he ought to be. I raised him.

Well does it belong here. Been here for 12 years.

We sort of figure he's a permanent boarder.

Here Peaches! Come here, Peaches.

Don't call him over here! Hey Peaches!

Don't run and he won't chase ya!

Hey! What are you running for? He won't hurt ya.

Are you hurt?

Oh my!

Oughta be... stay away from those horses.

Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!

I reckon I'm all right now. If you like, you can put me down.

Are you sure now? Yeah, I'm all right. Put me down.

What is it? What is it? Oh, it's my ankle.

Your ankle? Which one? This one.

Well, you better get that boot off and get some cold water on it before it swells up.

Here's a water trough right here. Careful now.

Here. Sit down there. Now, I'll get the boot.

It's my ankle that's hurt! Oh, I'm sorry.

Sorry. Put it in here.

Feel good? Yeah, feels a lot better.

Hey, what'd you run fer?

Oh, well, I was afraid of two things.

First it was the mule and then it was the horse.

As a matter of fact, it's a phobia. A what?

A phobia. You know how some people are afraid

to go on top of tall buildings and some are afraid to go on elevators.

Well, my - uh, my bugaboo is animals.

Well, I'll be dad-burned. What kind?

Well, all kinds. I'm just afraid of all kinds of animals.

A great big fella like you? Size hasn't got anything to do with it.

I was afraid of 'em when I was... when I was a little fella.

Well, how come? Oh, I don't know.

I guess it's hereditary.

The Jordans have always been afraid of animals.

Oh, my father's worse than I am. He was a wreck before automobiles came in.

Well, ain't there nothing you can do about it?

Oh, I don't suppose there is.

My grandfather was afraid of 'em. His grandfather was afraid.

In fact, the Jordan family all the way back to Bible days have been afraid.

It's lucky they didn't git on the ark. Hmm? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, the ankle feel better?

Oh it feels all right now. It's fine.

It's all right? Uh huh.

Well, I guess you can make it to the house. It's right over there.

I better be going.

Oh, don't let that mule bother you, stranger.

He's only a pet and wanted to play with you.

I'll keep him locked up while you're here.

'Sides, you was sayin' something about work.

What kind can you do?

Oh, I don't think I'd be much good around here on a ranch.

There's too many animals and too many birds, and chickens,

and dogs. Aw, that's all right.

I'll keep 'em all locked up while you're here.

Hey, you will, huh? Sure. What are you good at?

Well, we play and sing.

I got the rest of my orchestra right down by the gate.

Hey, did you ever hear of us? The Three Sharps?

No. Oh, you haven't?

Well, right now we're on our way to Hollywood to get in pictures.

Things got kind of slow in Brooklyn. You say you can sing and play?

Yeah, we're pretty hot.

Look, I've got an idea. Did you ever...?

Oh, by the way, what's your name? Mine's Jane. Jane Hardy.

Oh, Elly. Elly Jordan. Howdy, stranger.

Hi. I was saying...

Did you ever wear cowboy clothes? Well, no, not since I was a kid in school.

Well you're gonna start wearin' 'em right now!

I'm gonna give you and your orchestra a job.

You can sing cowboy songs and play cowboy music for the dudes.

Oh, we're from Brooklyn. Oh, that's all right.

I'll learn how to talk, same way as I taught Pop and Jeff.

Why in an hour, these dudes will think you was born in a corral.

You better make up your mind if you want the job right now.

It's gittin' pretty near suppertime.

Hey, you mean if I take the job, I can get the rest of the band

and we can come up here to get something to eat?

If you like. Oh, boy, that's wonder... Oh! Oh!

Well, I'll go get 'em right away. I'll be right back. I'll be right back.

Hey Ma. Where's my boots and chaps?

Jane give 'em to Elly.

Between you and I, Ma, this goin' too far.

Jane hadn't oughta give him my clothes to wear!

I'm liable to catch that epidemic of his. What epidemic?

Shyin' at animals! I'd be in a heck of a fit if I was to git it.

Yes, well, I wouldn't be too optimistic about it if I was you.

Well, look who's comin'!

Oh, roll your own! Hi ya, Sam!

Hello, folks. Hi ya, Pop.

You ain't funny, Sam.

Oh, I didn't hurt you none, did I, Pop?

No, Sam, I'm used to that one now. What's that stickin' outta your pocket there?

Oh, that? That's a new brand of smokes I just picked up down at Cody.

Have one. Don't mind if I do.

Hey! Take that blame thing offa there!

Guess I'm goin' in the house. Reckon I can't appreciate this type of humor.

Well, I got you all that time, Pop!

Why you're liable to snap a man's arm off with a thing like that.

Oh, come on. You're just gittin' soft, that's all!

Figure I am. But so are you. What do you mean?

Well, when I was your age, I didn't let any city slicker steal my gal right from under my nose.

What you talkin' about? Oh, nothing.

Hey, where's Jane?

Well, this mornin' she was down in the pasture behind the old oak givin' a lesson to one of them guests.

Guests, huh? What's he look like? I don't know, only from what the gals told me.

He must be a pretty smart fella though. He's got every gal on this ranch tuggin' at her halter.

I reckon I'll be seein' ya. And what I mean tuggin'!

Hi. Howdy is the word.

Oh, howdy I forgot. Forgit.

Forgit, forgit. Yeah, mustn't forget that. Forgit it. Forgit it.

Say you're late for your lesson.

Yeah, well a couple of chickens had me cornered by the barn down there.

Cornered?

Yeah, I was on the way up and comin' around the barn.

There were those doggone chickens and they wouldn't let me by.

Too bad you don't carry a gun. You could have shot your way out!

Now heck, Jane, that's nothin' to kid a fella about. You should have seen the dirty looks they were givin' me.

All right, forgit it. Let's git on with your lesson.

Let me hear you pluck that guitar. Okay, what do we play?

Well first let's take Ride Tenderfoot Ride. Here we go.

♪ La le da en da da De de de de de de ♪

♪ Ride, tenderfoot, ride tonight ♪

♪ Let the old range riders be at your side tonight ♪

♪ They're fast company So if you wanna be a cowboy ♪

♪ Then you gotta ride, tenderfoot, ride You know I gotta be a cowboy ♪

♪ You gotta hit the trail In Oklahoma when the moon is pale ♪

♪ And git to Texas with the mornin' mail 'Fore you can be a cowboy ♪

♪ Oh you know that I gotta be a cowboy ♪

♪ You gotta rope and throw You gotta git your share of buffalo ♪

♪ And win the money at the rodeo 'Fore you can be a cowboy ♪

♪ You gotta tend your cattle jist the best as you can Hold your likker like a man ♪

♪ And ride, tenderfoot, ride tonight Let the old range riders be at your side tonight ♪

♪ They're fast company So if you wanna be a cowboy ♪

♪ Then you gotta ride, tenderfoot, ride Ride, ride, ride ♪

♪ Oh Mr. Tenderfoot, you gotta ride ♪ Whoa!

Hi Jane. Howdy Sam. What do you want?

I brung some good news. Such as?

I got some big things stirrin' fer myself. That ain't news.

Look me over. Yes sir. You're lookin' at the star performer at Coogan's dance next Saturday.

Well do tell! Oh I ain't jokin'.

Well neither am I.

Yes sir. I'm a big man in Wyoming now. People is talkin' about me.

Yeah, what are they sayin'? Well they're sayin' that I'm good.

Ever since I sung at that amateur hour in Cheyenne, things has been happening.

Ol' man Coogan hired me on account of it. Yeah? Did he hear it?

Sure he heard it, and a whole lot of other people too.

I reckon it won't be long 'fore Col. Rose is sendin' for me.

Now look, Sam, take your arm away. Go away. I'm busy.

Oh uh, excuse me. Who are you?

Jordan. Elly Jordan. The Three Sharps from Brooklyn.

Ever hear of us? Oh Elly, this here's Sam Thorne.

Hi. Uh, howdy. Howdy. Another guitar player, huh?

Yeah, yeah, you play?

There's a funny one, him askin' if I play. Tell him who I am, Jane.

He's a guitar player.

I'm a music master around these parts, son.

Yes sir. I played on more amateur contests than you can shake a stick at.

That's funny. I never heard of you. You're kiddin' when you're sayin' that, ain't you?

Now look, Sam, we're practicing for the campfire tonight.

Elly's gonna sing. Now will you please go away?

Well all right, have it your own way.

But I reckon I'll stick around and hear your friend Elly sing. I bet that'll be funny!

Huh! Sounds like a wisecrack to me.

Oh, don't mind him. Come on, Elly. Let's try it again.

Well, what's the matter?

Didn't you forgit something? That's mighty pretty underwear you got there!

Huh? Underwear?

Holy mackerel! I did forget something! I'll be back later.

♪ As I was a-walkin' one mornin' for pleasure ♪

♪ I saw a cowpuncher come ridin' along ♪

♪ His hat was throwed back and his spurs was a-jinglin' ♪

♪ As he approached he was singin' this song ♪

♪ Whoopie-ti-yi-yo, git along little dogies ♪

♪ It's your misfortune and none of my own ♪

♪ Whoopie-ti-yi-yo, git along little dogies ♪

♪ For old Wyoming will be your new home ♪

Well, I reckon tonight's patrol leader has somethin' else in her craw for you.

And now, boys and girls, the next on our program will be Prof. Landis!

Known on the vaudeville stage as Henry the Great.

I reckon Prof. Landis will show us our heap entertainment.

Oh uh, was heap correct? Pile.

Oh pile is more Comanche Indian, Mrs. Krinkenheim. Heap is correct.

Pardon me. Prof. Landis!

Well folks, tonight with your permission and the assistance of my daughter Panthea...

Just a minute, young lady. Better take your hat off.

There you are.

Thank you, friends. And now enough of the joking.

Tonight I propose, if I may have your strict attention,

to give you a demonstration of occult hypnotics, a study in the psychology of the human brain.

Now Panthea, if you will just stand in this position, you will gaze into my eyes.

Whatcha doin' here, Elly? You ain't a-feared of Prof. Landis, are ya?

Well, it's not the professor. It's the things he does that scares me.

Oh, everybody knows that's a fake.

I know, Jane, but I can't help it. Last night he hypnotized me.

And tonight he pulls out pigeons and rabbits.

First thing you know, he'll be pullin' that mule outta someplace.

Look Elly, ain't there nothin' you can do to ever git over this fear?

Oh, I guess there isn't, Jane. I gave up tryin' a long time ago.

Well, maybe if you had an object, like somethin' to fight for, or someone that...

Well, I've always had my mother.

Well, a feller's mother ain't quite like if he had a girl, maybe.

Well, I never thought of it that way. I... Especially a girl he kinda likes,

'cause if he thought lots of her, he could do lots of things,

'specially things like this, because he wouldn't want to be a coward in front of her.

Say, maybe that'll help. Well, at least I can try.

You will? Sure. Tell ya what I'll do.

Soon as I get enough money to go back to Brooklyn. I'll... I'll look up a girl.

You don't mean you're gonna leave the ranch, do you?

Oh, gosh, Jane. I got to some day. I can't stay here forever.

Ever since I've been here... I don't see... I don't mean to be ungrateful but...

All loafin' and singin' like I've been doin' around here.

I always felt like I was imposing on you people.

Folks. Folks, yeah folks.

I was thinkin' of it the other day

and I thought maybe I'd speak to Jeff and see... Well what about me?

I mean, Pop and Ma. Gee, Elly, they'd miss you somethin' dreadful.

'Sides, if you'd stick around here, maybe you'd kinda git used to animals.

Oh, I don't know. You gotta...

Crowd's clappin'. The professor's through. We better be gittin' back.

Now uh, you better... you better see if he's caught those pigeons and those other animals, will ya?

Yup, they're all gone.

I don't trust him though. I better hang around here. I'll be long later.

Oh Elly, for Pete's sake! Uh Jane, wait up.

I guess I'll go. Reckon.

Reckon, yeah, reckon. That's more like it!

I don't want to, but I'll go.

You know something, Speed, this is the greatest thrill I ever had in my life.

Out here on the prairie, away from New York City,

out where you meet honest, sincere people, the pioneers of the west...

where men are men, the men that really made the west.

Well, I like it. It's a great spot. Well, I hope you keep that idea.

It's a long way to come just to relax. Yeah, and I want to tell you something else.

For the next four weeks, Speed, I'm going to lose my identity, see?

I'm not Roy Chadwick, the big theatrical agent of New York City.

I'm just... just plain Roy. Right.

Right. Now I'll tell you something else.

I want to forget New York and all those phonies! And you get this.

If you make one crack about your business, you're fired! Get it?

I'll get a new publicity man. Right.

Right. We're on a vacation. But I mean a vacation.

And now, folks, we'll practice the Comanche Indian war yell.

Howdy, folks. Hi ya, Pop.

We wired ahead for reservations. I'm Roy Chadwick, New York theatrical agent.

Handle everything. Radio, television, carnivals, circus...

Oh yeah. Meet Speed Dunn. Hi ya, my boy.

I reckon you come to the right spot, partner. I'll get the boy.

Hey, Jeff.

Hey, what was that?

Sound like somebody going through a meat chopper or something.

No no, them's the dudes down by the campfire. They're practicin' Indian yells.

Oh yeah, I thought maybe you were barbecuing a relative.

That go on every night?

No, no, just Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays.

Rest the time, they practice yuppees and hog callin'.

What do you do on Sundays?

Well, Sundays 'bout seven o'clock we... Don't tell me. I know. It's bank night.

Get the bags out of the car. Mr. Chadwick wants to go to his room.

Hey, Jeff. Bank night...

And now, the next... And now, folks, we'll have some real entertainment.

I'm gonna sing...

♪ Oh give me a home... ♪

This ain't no impromptu program. You can sing later.

But right now, Elly's gonna sing the closin' number on tonight's campfire.

All right, Jane, have it your own way.

But I'm warnin' you. You're gonna regret this.

I'll take the risk.

Come on, Elly. Git goin'.

Is it all right. Sure. Go on.

♪ I'll dream tonight ♪

♪ I'll toss the whole night through ♪

♪ I'll dream tonight ♪

♪ And all because of you ♪

♪ The trees will dance The mountaintops will ring ♪

♪ A million stars will sing upon the sea ♪

♪ My eyes will see a rainbow-colored sky ♪

♪ The moon will be a place for us to fly ♪

♪ I'll have the sweetest nightmare that I ever knew ♪

♪ I'll dream because I fell in love with you ♪

♪ I'll dream tonight ♪

♪ I'll toss the whole night through ♪

♪ I'll dream tonight ♪

You've got enough leather here to open a boot factory. Another load a-comin'!

Thanks, Pop.

Well, Speed, we certainly picked out the right place to rest.

Yes sir. Plenty of peace and quiet, lot of fresh air.

Fresh air? You better open that window.

Yes sir, I'm sure gonna relax out here.

No Broadway. No New York. No musical di...

♪ A rainbow-colored sky... ♪

Where's that voice coming from? Out back of that barn, I guess.

♪ A place for us to fly I'll have the sweetest nightmare... ♪

Speed, if we can locate the possessor of that voice, we're made.

I guess our vacation's over.

Listen fella, we find that singer and we'll have a vacation the rest of our lives. Come on.

♪ I'll dream because I fell in love with you ♪

Hi Pop. Remember me. Same fella. Roy Chadwick. New York City. Theatrical agent... I know...

Speed Dunn, my publicity man. I met him.

Well look, it's been a tough season. We're looking for an attraction.

Who was that guy singing? Don't stand there wasting dough. We're losing time. Come on.

You heard what he said. Don't waste his time.

He's a big theatrical man in New York and he's got an idea.

Locate that singer. There he is!

That's my man!

A mental case. Yep.

At last! At last! At last the fellow I've been looking for all my life.

A singing troubadour. A real cowboy with a hillbilly voice.

What a set of pipes! What a voice! Are you talkin' to me?

Now don't be afraid. He's your friend. Well, I don't seem to remember him.

You'll remember me the rest of your life when you find out what I'm gonna do for you.

What's your name? Who wants to know?

Now wait a minute. Don't get excited. I'm all right.

I'm Roy Chadwick. New York City. Theatrical agent. Handle all the big people.

You're gonna have a colossal career. Well you've got a sensational voice.

You're a natural! Oh, you like my voice, huh?

What we want to know is are you signed up with anybody?

Where are you signed up? I'll break the contract.

Well, I'm signin' up to play at Coogan's dance...

Coogan's dance? I'll break that engagement.

I might even get you on the radio, you know, singing on the air.

I might even get you in pictures. Hey, could you git me on Col. Rose's Hour?

Liable to get you on for an hour and a half! You can't tell.

How would you like to get $100 a week... $75 a week for the rest of your life?

He's cracked as sure as you're a foot high...

Now you stay out of this, Pop. I seen him first.

Wastin' a lot of time. Losin' a lot of dough. We sign the contract right away.

You got a fountain pen. Hey, give me a piece of paper.

Hey Jeff, give it to him 'fore he changes his mind.

Here's your pen and paper. This your pen? This is not a pen.

It's a fish hook. Give me yours. What's your name?

Sam Thorne. Sam. No, no, that's no good.

Have you got some other kind of a name? Well, I got a cousin... a cousin named Steve Thorne.

Steve. Steve Gibson. That's it. Something that breathes with the old time west.

Wyoming Steve Gibson! Wyoming Steve Gibson!

I can picture you on a pinto pony coming out of Holland Tunnel

taking charge of Time Square like the pioneers took charge of the old wild west.

Yahoo! Whatcha signin', Jeff? A check?

No, I'm signing the contract giving us personal handling.

It means I take 25%. Usually take 50. But this is legal representation publicity.

Here, sign, and we'll get the first train out for New York.

You got to hit the trail in Oklahoma... What are you, a ventriloquist or something?

Hey! ♪ ...when the moon is pale ♪

♪ And git to Texas with the... ♪ Hey mister, he ain't got no good voice.

Quiet, wope. Say listen, this is on the level.

I'm a theatrical agent from New York. Go over that again for me, will ya?

Same song? Yeah yeah, a few bars.

Sure. ♪ You got to rope and throw ♪

♪ You got to git your share of buffalo And when the... ♪

Yeah, that's it! That's the voice. That's the genuine hillbilly voice I wanted.

This is on the level. I'm from New York. I got a career all set for you.

But mister, you said you like my voice. You said I was a natural.

Now, wait a minute. We'll take care of that. You sing a few bars.

Oh shucks, it's just like an amateur contest, me singin' against him.

♪ Oh give me a home Where the buffalo... ♪

That's it! That's the voice I don't want. Here sign right here.

Sign what? What is it? What is it?

If there's any signin' goin' on around here, I reckon I oughta know what it is.

This feller's an agent, Jane. He handles big people.

He wants to sign Elly on a contract and take him to New York.

Sounds pretty good, doesn't it, Jane? I reckon so.

What's your name? Oh, Jordan, Elly. Elly Jordan.

No, Elly. Sam. I gotta have a real cow-billy name.

Uh, Steve. Steve Gibson! Wyoming Steve Gibson!

I can picture you mounted on a pinto pony coming out... No, no, I said that.

Just sign this... Hey, you said that was my name.

Ah, we were just practicing. Go away.

But ain't you gonna take me to New York and give me $75 a week?

For Pete's sake, Elly, hurry up and sign that thing, or I will.

Sign right here. When does that train leave for Chicago?

11:50, out of Cody. Speed, get the baggage.

Get my car, will ya? But do you have to leave tonight, Elly?

Yeah, we gotta leave tonight. Can't waste any time. Losin' dough! Here we go!

Oh Jane...

Oh, oh Jane, I uh... Well, I reckon you're goin'.

Yeah, yeah, I guess I am. Reckon.

I reckon. Reckon. I reckon I am, yeah.

You'll be all right if you'll just say git instead of get.

And for Pete's sake, stop sayin' doggy instead of dogie.

Dogie, dogie, yeah, I'll... I'll watch that. Uh, dogie.

Say, uh, now that I'm going, you ain't gonna fire Spec and Louie, are ya?

Oh I reckon not. The way Jeff's comin' along, they can still stay The Three Sharps.

Hey, that's swell of ya. Tell ya what I'll do. I'll send for 'em as soon as I get to be famous.

Well, I reckon it's nice to know at least you're gonna send for something. I mean, someone.

Yeah... Well, I just feel kinda funny gettin' back... Gittin'.

Uh, gittin' back to the big city.

Yeah, I reckon there'll be lots of excitement, meetin' folks... and girls.

But then again, you've met girls around here.

Yeah, but what kind of girls? All of 'em wearin' boots and chaps and hats.

Why, I don't even look on 'em as girls! I reckon I never thought of that.

Wyoming, what are you waitin' for? Ready to go. Hurry up.

Well, I... I... I guess I better go.

I certainly want to thank you for everything you've done for me.

Oh, I reckon it ain't been much, Elly. Oh, but it has.

Elly, I... Oh, I...

Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!

Come on. Hurry up. We haven't got any time to lose.

What's all the excitement about? I ain't got time to tell ya now.

Elly's gotta catch the steam cars. He's goin' to New York.

Come on, Steve. Come on!

Come on. Here we go. What? Wait. Wait a minute.

Moms and Pops, I want to thank you for bein' so nice to me. Now listen, Steve. There's no time for sentiment.

You can write to your mother and father on the train.

Send 'em a Valentine, if you want to. They're gonna be proud of you, Steve.

I'm proud of you. The world is proud of you!

Speed, wire ahead to the press. Meet us at the Grand Central.

Wire the chief of police and the mayor of New York. We'll have the greatest parade in the history of Manhattan.

Think of it! Wyoming Steve Gibson parading up Broadway... In a car?

No, on a wild bucking bronco! Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!

Here he comes, boys!

Here he is, New York!

Roy Chadwick gives you Wyoming Steve Gibson!

Hey, what is this, Chadwick? Another phony? What is this? Another fake-a-roo?

Give us the lowdown, Roy.

All right, gentlemen, this time Chadwick gives you the real thing.

A singing cowboy from the plains, Wyoming Steve Gibson!

My press agent here, Speed Dunn, will give you a statement he prepared on the train.

Wyoming, give us that golden voice of the prairie. Swing it!

♪ Way out where I come from The dogs are 10 feet high ♪

♪ And a man can light his cigar from The moon up in the sky ♪

♪ Way out where I come from The corn grows up so tall ♪

♪ That there ain't no one to pick it We just wait for it to fall ♪

♪ Howdy stranger! Howdy do to you Step right up and call me pard ♪

♪ I am the roughest toughest maverick That you ever knew... ♪

Wyoming! Give it up!

♪ Way out where I come from The cows are like a dream ♪

♪ But they ain't much good for milkin' 'cause They only give us cream ♪

♪ Way out where I come from The chickens are our pride ♪

♪ They lay eggs the way we want 'em Some are scrambled, some are fried ♪

♪ Howdy neighbor, do the hidy-hi Step right up and call me pard ♪

♪ If you ever come out my way Say you're a friend of mine ♪

♪ And the whole darn world is your backyard ♪

All right, Wyoming, now we've got something that'll take you back to the plains.

It'll remind you of those old days when your forefathers crossed the Rocky Mountains in a covered wagon.

You got that thing? And how! Right over at the newsstand!

Police motorcycle escort will pick you up at 43rd Street and I've got the permit.

Wyoming, this is gonna cure all of your homesickness.

And carry back to the glorious golden west. Take it away!

Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!

Look this way, Wyoming. Okay.

Would you like to be back on the plains, Wyoming? Oh, yes sir... Uh, yesiree!

Say, I reckon there's a heap of you city fellows that'd like to git out in them plains and git some fresh air in your lungs, huh?

And what's more, take a ride on the range, for instance.

At the end of the day when you brings your pinto into the chuck wagon,

why that's when you'll really know you've been doin' some real herdin'.

I bet you've been punching cows all your life, haven't you, Wyoming?

Huh? Oh, more'n that. I can hardly remember. I... I...

Wyoming! Excuse me, fellas.

Take off your hat, fellas. Here's a little lady who's been dying to meet you. My kid sister Maxine.

Maxine, meet the one and only Wyoming Steve Gibson.

Oh, Mr. Wyoming, I can't tell you how thrilled I am. See that! She can't tell you how thrilled she is.

Well, I'm thrilled myself.

I guess the pleasure is all yours - I mean, mine.

Yours, hers, mine, both of us. So you've just got a few minutes to talk.

You're practically on the air right now. ♪ Ride, tenderfoot, ride... ♪

Honestly, I've heard so much about you and read so much about you

and listened to so many of your songs on the radio, I feel as if I've absolutely known you all my life.

Do you mind if I call you Wyoming? Well, you see I... I... I...

What's the matter?

Oh, I guess I just git a little nervous when I ain't got my spurs on.

All right, Mr. Gibson. Time's up. Let's go. All right. Goodbye.

All right, Wyoming, come on. You're on the air. Hurry up.

Again, it's Cornies privilege and pleasure to bring you that singing cowboy of the plains- Wyoming Steve Gibson!

♪ Ride, tenderfoot, ride tonight ♪

♪ See the old range riders there at your side tonight ♪

♪ They're fast company So if you wanna be a cowboy ♪

♪ Then you gotta ride, tenderfoot, ride ♪

♪ You gotta hit the trail In Oklahoma when the moon is pale ♪

♪ And git to Texas with the mornin' mail 'Fore you can be a cowboy ♪

♪ You gotta rope and throw You gotta git your share of buffalo ♪

♪ And win the money at the rodeo 'Fore you can be a cowboy ♪

♪ You gotta tend your cattle the best you can Hold your likker like a man ♪

♪ Oh ride, tenderfoot, ride tonight See the old range riders there at your side tonight ♪

♪ They're fast company So if you want to be a cowboy ♪

♪ Then you gotta ride, tenderfoot, ride Ride, ride, tenderfoot, ride ♪

Jane. Say Jane. Whatcha want, Pops?

There's an article here I reckon you might be interested in.

What's it about?

They're gonna have a big rodeo at Madison Square Garden next week.

Now there'd be a good excuse for you to git to New York, like you've been lookin' fer.

Why don't you leave me alone? That's what I say. Git yourself out of here.

Sittin' around gabbin' like... while we're tryin' to listen.

Go on and git yourself out to the corral. Oh shucks, Ma, I ain't got my boots on.

Then be careful how you step!

You're likely to tread on one of them bad big stones and bat your brains out.

I wha...? Oh thunderation!

Ma...

Go on. Turn on that video again. Let's hear the rest of Elly's program.

I declare, lately your father's been actin' like he's a little feeble above the collar-button.

♪ I'll dream because I fell in love with you ♪

Well, that's it.

Say kid, you've met Wyoming, so I think I'll duck.

If you don't, I'll break your neck!

She's readin' something! Golly, I hope it's a letter.

From Elly, huh?

What's he say? Who?

Elly got everything under tether? Yeah, same old thing.

Misses the ranch. Wishes he was back here.

Pop, sometimes I think your tongue hung on a hinge.

Huh? Here's some advertisin' for you.

Orlan Hardy's Dude Ranch, Cody, Wyoming. Dear sir.

June 28th ushers in the 4th annual rodeo in Madison Square Garden.

We feel... Humm... Shucks, I'd kinda like to go to New York.

So would I! But I reckon it costs too much money.

I don't know! Think of the advertisin' the ranch would git!

Why, everybody in the east would hear about us!

Heck, I never thought of that.

Why, we could enter that rodeo with the name Hardy's Dude Ranch slapped on everything!

Yeah, and mortgages slapped on top of that.

Huh? Yeah. No Pop, I reckon we'll just sit where we are.

You're right, Jane.

Anyhow, we're all so softened up I reckon we'd fall off a Shetland pony if we was to git on him.

Is that so?

Say, I bet Jeff and me and some of the other hands could win enough prize money to pay for the trip.

Uh, I reckon you're wrong, Jane.

T'other mornin' when you rode by, I see'd enough daylight twixt you and the saddle to run a tractor through, eh?

No, you ride a mighty cool saddle. No...

How long you think it'd take us to git packed?

Pop, I reckon you better put on socks! We're goin' to New York! Yipee!

Jeff! We're goin' to New York! Yahoo!

You're speakin' to him. Oh yeah. Well send 'em right up he-ar.

Mr. Gibson. I don't mean to interrupt, but you got 500 fan letters to answer.

Oh shucks, I'm awful sorry. I was keepin' you waiting while I was goin' over that song there.

Haven't looked at this today.

Oh, by the way, Miss... uh... Semple.

Did you send that letter to Jane Hardy care of Hardy's Dude Ranch at Cody, Wyoming?

Yes I did. Every morning, that's the first one I mail.

Oh, thank you. This one's from near your home.

Did you ever hear of the Bar Two Ranch? The Bar Two?

Uh, yeah yeah! That's right... right next to the Bar One!

Dear Mr. Gibson, We listen to your Cornies program every Tuesday night and we want your advice.

We're having trouble with branding.

Seeing as you're an old hand cattle raising, maybe you can tell us why our doggies get an awful rash from the hot irons.

Heh, a rash from the hot irons, huh? That's what it says.

Well shucks, that's easy. Just tell 'em to use a cold one!

Yeah uh, incidentally Miss... Semple.

The word is dogie, not doggy.

Uh, that'll be all, Miss... Semple.

And don't forget, you have an appointment with the artist at 2:00

and there's a rehearsal at the studio at 4:00

and at 6:00 the Gibson girls tryout for winning a trophy.

Ma! How are you, darling? How are you? Glad to see you.

Pops, how's it going? Very poor, Elly.

I still ain't working. Well, come on and see the place, huh?

How do you like it? Better than Flatbush, isn't it?

Oh Elly, you shouldn't have let us come here.

Mom, I wanted you to see where I live. But darling, suppose Mr. Chadwick finds out.

Well that's just what I want him to do. What?

I've given him a pretty raw deal.

He signed me up and brought me here at a good salary.

Then just as soon as I got to goin' over, well he gave me this beautiful hotel suite to live in,

then he changed the contract, and now I share in all the money we make.

He's a nice fella. And I'm gonna tell him the truth too.

Well now, ain't that just fine!

Here you are, young man. Go buy yourself a box of Cornies.

Thanks, Mr. Gibson. Thank you.

Come on, let's open this!

What do you suppose it is? Oh, stirrups or saddles.

They always send me somethin' I can't use. Dear Mr. Gibson,

Please forgive us for sending you a present, but we think you're wonderful.

We've just started the Steve Gibson Club for Girls.

If the boys can have clubs, why can't we?

We hope you like the present. Signed: Sincerely, The Gibson Girls.

The Gibson Girls? Uh huh!

Oh, isn't that cute!

Oh gosh! A canary! Get it away from me!

Oh, you Jordans make me sick! Afraid of a little bird!

Hey, Wyoming! Oh, Roy!

What are you doin'? Playing games or something?

Oh, we were just... uh... Hey! Hey! Who are you?

Why I... I'm just sort of a known to Elly. Uh, I mean Mr. Gibson.

Yeah, he's known me all my life. Now listen, Elly.

I've got some great news for you, see? Come here...

I've got some great news for you. Yeah?

Yeah, right... right from the coast. Oh, about my screen test?

They think you'll be sensational in pictures. Oh, they do, huh?

Yeah. You getting everything all right? Why don't you sit down?

Thank you. They wired me a contract!

Oh, they did? Yeah, but I turned it down?

Well why? Elly, you photograph like a million dollars.

Oh, I do, huh? They only offered you 1250.

Excuse me, but I think 1250 is very good.

Of course, when I was Elly's age, I started in at 15 a week.

You were probably overpaid. He means 12 hundred and 50 dollars a week.

Listen, don't get excited. I got everything fixed.

W.P. Alvey, the executive head of production, left by plane. He'll be here in the morning.

Now he's all excited, see?

We won't sign a thing, not till he comes to our terms.

Roy, look, I want you to meet... uh... How are you?

Oh, did Speed tell you about the advertising stunt we got figured?

Yeah, he told me. But Roy... Rodeo in the Garden next week.

What? The roundup. Now don't get excited.

I know how you feel when you see horses.

You get hay fever or something. Well I get asthma. All you gotta do is get in the box. Judge the contest.

Sing one of those prairie songs. You know, like one of those... one of those extra lonesome kind.

Get 'em all crying. Then I'll get W.P. in the box.

I'll tell him 1750. Then he'll cry. Then we'll all cry.

With 10,000 people crying, how's he gonna refuse to sign?

Will I have to do anything else? Well sure, give a cowboy a silver saddle.

What for? I don't know.

Bullfroggin' or something. What's the difference? As long as he knows who wins.

Well, how am I gonna know that? What kind of a cowboy are you?

Always tryin' to make a mountain out of a moleskin. Roy, look I've been wanting to do something.

I want you to meet my mother and father. How are you? Huh? What'd you say?

My mother and father! What kind of nonsense is this?

Mr. Chadwick, we think you've done wonderful things for our boy.

Now look, look, lady! Take it easy, will ya?

You're not his mother, see? His mother's in Wyoming. So is his old man....

Oh, no. No, no, no, you're thinkin' about Pa and Ma. That's right. So I am.

Yeah, well, they're not my parents. He's always clowning.

You see, pretty soon you're gonna tell me you're not a real cowboy.

I'm not a cowboy, Roy, and I never was!

Give me an aspirin! Will a peppermint do?

Now look. Look, Elly.

Tell me this is on the level. This is very important to me.

Where were you born? Flatbush, Brooklyn, New York.

Over a grocery store. Have another peppermint.

Oh Roy, I'm awfully sorry. I should have told you a long time ago.

I wouldn't have done it to you for the world. Yeah, but you did!

You let me spend every nickel of my hard-earned dough to promote you in advertising.

Sold you to the nation as a singing cowboy! First genuine attraction I've had in two years!

Tried to stage a come-back through you.

Roy, I... I... I'm sorry. I guess we just better call the whole thing off.

Better call the whole thing... Whoa! What whole thing?

Well the fact that I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson. Just tell everybody I'm a fake!

We can't do that! We have a contract signed and everything.

I've sold you as a genuine singing cowboy.

If they find out you're a fake, we'll all get thrown in the Bastille.

Elly, this is terrible. Wait a minute. Hold everything, everybody.

Nobody knows but the four of us here who Elly really is.

Now we keep our mouth shut till W.P. signs the contract, it doesn't make any difference what's your past.

Well do you think that'll be all right? It's gotta be all right, Elly.

You've still got a good voice. You can still sing cowboy songs.

I've sold you as a bona fide attraction.

Now look, Elly. It's perfectly legitimate for us to build any kind of a background in the world for you.

We've sold one thing for you to the public... One thing... Glamour!

He's my son! Glamour!

Well, as long as you haven't another one of them daydreamin' spells, I reckon I better go look for Pop.

And if I find him in another one of them there pinochle games, I'm gonna hogtie him till the end of the journey!

Hello Ma, can I come in?

I reckon you can, but it'll seem like you're alone. Jane's havin' one of them there spells.

Lookie here, Jane, I want to speak to you a might about this here fella Elly...

What about it?

And another thing... What?

Lately it's been comin' back to my ears that the boys over in Cody is sayin' that you ain't my gal no more.

Well, what give you the idea I ever was? Well if that don't take the bacon right off'n the hog!

Did I ever say I was? Well no, but...

Who's been walkin' ya home from meetin' for nigh on to six years?

And who's pinto was it the first I shoed when we got our new anvil?

Them things got some significance. Look Sam, why we've been playmates.

We was brung up together on the ranch and we look on you as one of the family, but...

Yeah? Well, a gal don't marry into her own family!

Now I'm beginnin' to understand. You got a hankerin' for this here Elly.

Well, I reckon it don't take nobody to hit you over the head with a wagon spoke to make it any clearer!

Well all right, I can take my lickin' like a man.

But just let me tell you one thing! Just you wait till I git to New York!

All right. All right.

We will now listen to a voice from the golden west... Mr. Sam Thorne.

Wyoming Sam Thorne! Wyoming, the mic is all yours.

♪ Oh give me a home Where the buffalo roam ♪

♪ Where the deer and the antelope play ♪

♪ Where seldom is heard... ♪ I ain't finished yet!

All right. All right. You've just heard the voice of Mr. Sam Thorne.

Wyoming Sam Thorne... at least that's what he calls himself.

Hold on! I ain't through yet! Listen folks, I am the real Wyoming!

You've all been fooling, listenin' to this fella that calls himself Wyoming Steve Gibson.

That ain't his name and he ain't a real cowboy and I can prove it to ya!

And what's more, he steals hearts... All right. All right.

Hold the front page spread! Some hick just cracked over the radio that Wyoming Steve Gibson's a phony!

How's he comin', Elly? I think he's breathing!

Think! Come, Elly. This is no time for guesswork.

Roy? Did you hear that? I don't have to ask. He did.

Hey, look, look! His eyes are opening! Roy! Roy!

Give me some aspirin! Give me a lot of aspirin!

Now listen, Roy, are we gonna die laying down?

Somebody figure out a new way to do it?

Roy, listen! This is no time to go to pieces! We gotta do something!

Boys, we're all through! I'm licked, I tell you! I'm through!

No, you're not! Listen, we gotta do something! Snap out of it!

We have to do it in a hurry too! Reporters will be here in five minutes!

What can we do? We gotta prove that Wyoming's on the level!

Not a chance, boys! Not a chance! Take a look at the parents!

Take a look at him! What's he look like?

Guest star at a wake! I'm a piano tuner.

I'll get it. Come back here!

The reporters! Hello. Hel... Oh...

Speed, you better get yourself an ice bag! Who is it?

Dalloway, the producer! He's down in the lobby.

Mr. Chadwick will be... Mr. Chadwick will be right down. Yeah, uh.

Look! Get this! I'm gonna go down to the lobby and get rid of Alvey before those reporters get here.

Now where are you gonna take him? I don't know! Around the Kansas City.

Around the block. Get him a drink. Some place to get rid of him. Then I'll come back to the hotel.

See, I'll fix everything! Where's my hat?

Oh, I'll get it. You don't need your hat.

Gotta have a hat! My head's shakin'! Here...

Get an aspirin!

Now look, as soon as he gets rid of Alvey, we'll make a run for it.

Oh no no no! I ain't gonna chance it! I'm gonna take the fire escape.

I'll see you tonight in Brooklyn, eh? Oh no you don't! You're sticking right here!

If the reporters get here before I get back, don't say anything! Tell 'em you got laryngitis.

Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!

Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!

Jane! Hello, Elly. What's the matter?

Well, I was just running. There's an animal over there.

Shucks, ain't you over that yet? No, no.

Hey, what are you doin' here? I'm in the rodeo tomorrow.

In the rodeo? Uh huh.

Well good night! Look at you!

Say, you,,, well, you're beautiful! You look different. You look like a girl!

Well, what do you think I look like? A moose? No...

Gee Elly, I've missed ya. Seems like a year since I seen ya last.

Oh, it seems like ten to me.

I'd hoped you'd say that. I mean it.

I'd sort of figured that maybe you'd forgotten us, the ranch I mean.

The ranch? Oh gosh no! Say, every night since I've been in this town,

I guess I've thought about... Reckon! Yeah, I reckon I've thought about the campfires

and the fun we used to have. Yeah, anybody... I mean anything else?

Sure, the old feather bed I used to sleep in and Ma's cookin' and...

Hey, how's Peaches. Oh, he's fine.

Oh, you like her? Well, she's awful pretty.

Who is she? That's Roy's sister, Maxine Chadwick.

I took your advice. How come?

You know... you know you said for me to get a girl,

somebody I liked, somebody to fight for. From the looks of that dress she's wearing,

I reckon she ought to be able to cure ya of bein' shy of animals.

Oh, heck no. I even get jumpy now when I got flies in the room.

Shucks, look at me sittin' here gabbin'.

I almost forgot about Ma and Pop! They was comin' up after me.

Ma and Pop? Uh huh!

Well, they oughta be here by now! Let's go get 'em, huh?

Ma and Pop!... Well, there they are now.

Ma! How are ya? Glad to see ya.

Hello Pops. Glad to see you. Glad to see you too, Elly!

Howdy, Mr. Gibson! Mr. Gibson?

Well, now Ma, you don't have to give me that. You know my name is Elly.

Where's Jeff?

Oh, he's over visitin' Prof. Landis, the magician. Remember?

Oh...

He's doin' some sort of a hypnotizin' act in the theater.

You look right good, Elly! Thank you, Pops.

You sure come up in the world! I'll say! This is the top floor.

Take it easy, Ma. Uh, just a minute.

What ya lockin' up fer?

Well, ah, did you folks hear what happened tonight?

No, what? Well, Sam Thorne exposed me on the radio.

You mean when he was on Col. Rose's Amateur Hour?

Yeah, yeah! He let the cat out of the bag!

He's got every reporter in town on the way up here.

The skunk! He swore he'd do it!

I didn't think he'd have the nerve!

It's high time we let Jeff give him a good lickin'!

Oh, that's them now! Who's thar? Who's thar?

Come on, Wyoming, open up! Oh, it's Roy... Roy.

Well, I'm glad somebody had sense enough to lock the door.

The reporters are on the way up here now! Oh they are? Yeah.

What's that? Cowboys and Indians? The 101 Ranch or something?

Well no! That's Ma and Pa and Jane from the dude ranch.

You remember them?

Hey, the way I feel, I don't even remember coming in the door!

Hey Roy, you remember Ma and Pa. I used to work for 'em.

That's where you signed me up!

That fella's as loco as the first time we see'd him! Come on, Ma, let's git out!

Wait a minute!

Hold everything! Everybody! I'm thinking. Quiet now, Roy's thinking...

Parents! That's what you need, parents! Why shouldn't they be your parents?

It's too late now!

Pop, it's only for tonight. Just for the reporters that get here.

With both of you cow-people. He's a cowboy. Why shouldn't be your son?

It's all come over me like a miracle! You're his father. You're his mother. You're his sister. Do you follow me?

Yeah, but I don't like it! Pop, I tell you, it's only for tonight.

And it'll be a great add for the dude ranch. I'll introduce you as Wyoming's family.

With a father 'n' mother cowboy and a sister twirlin' rope, why shouldn't he be a cowboy?

It's all very simple! What could be better?

Now Roy, I think it would be better if... Why do I do all the thinking?

Come on now. Let's get a grip on ourselves. There they are now!

Pop, you sit over there. Mom, you sit next to him. Wyoming, sit right between 'em.

And honey, you sit right behind the desk. Here we go.

Now listen, when I open the door...

All right! Just a minute! All right, boys.

Now wait a minute! Wait a minute! What's all the fuss about?

Okay, Chadwick, what's the lowdown? Yeah, we'd like to know.

Yeah, what are you gonna do about this bird and the statement he made over the radio about Gibson?

Gentlemen, gentlemen, if there's any doubt in anybody's mind,

that Wyoming isn't a dyed-in-the-wool cowboy from the plains of Wyoming,

I can disprove in an instant.

Gentlemen, I give you Wyoming's mom and pop!

What?... ...What?

Hey, fellas, we're in luck!

These here people are the folks I was tellin' y'all about!

Pipe down, will ya? Listen, Mr. Gibson, we'd like a statement.

All right, we'll give you a statement. From him!

Oh, all right, fellers. What can I do for you?

This guy claims you aren't really a cowboy and you never were in Wyoming till three months ago.

Why...! Now wait a minute, Wyoming. Take it easy. No fighting!

This is all ridiculous! Oh, come on! We're wastin' our time!

Ask the Hardys. They know. Oh, take it easy, will ya?

Jane, tell 'em who this fella Gibson really is. Do you know Mr. Gibson?

I reckon I ought to! He's my brother! Jane!

Quiet! She ain't his sister!

She ain't, I tell you! How do you know?

Cuz I'm his ma. And I'm his pa.

All right! Three at a time! Why all this confusion?

That's his father and that's his mother and that's his sister!

That's a lie! This man's daffy, I tell you.

He's crazy! All right, quiet down, everybody!

Now look, do you folks know this fella Thorne?

Yes! No!

Well, get organized, will ya? Do you know him or don't ya?

No! Will ya stop getting 'em rattled!

That's the first time they've ever been to a big city.

This man's a liar! He tried to make me Wyoming Steve Gibson, only I wouldn't let him!

I never saw this Airedale before in all my life!

Oh, now we're getting nowheres fast!

All right, if you're so smart, how come Gibson's name is Gibson if his folk's name is Hardy?

How come? Yeah! How about it?

Gentlemen, that's very easy to explain! That's his stage name!

What's your real name, Mr. Gibson? Jordan!

Ahh! Ya see! I told you he wudn't their son! My man needs a rest.

Wait a minute, Roy! The public may be childish, but it's not crazy!

Yeah, what'd you do? Get some house movers to lift the drugstore off this guy?

Who is he? Your last year's torch singer in longer pants?

Now now, wait a minute! Ten seconds! Straighten the whole thing out!

He's a stepson. Pa!

I hated to tell ya, son, but... Don't tell him, Pop! I'll tell him.

Hey! What is this?

Elly, Elly, I reckon you're old enough to stand the truth now.

I ain't really your ma, and he ain't really your pa.

Oh Ma! Ma! Don't say that! I can't stand it, Ma! It'll kill me!

I just don't believe it! Neither do I!

But yeah, it's the truth. They found him on a doorstep with a note.

Yeah, yeah, there was a note. And the wind was howlin' and...

He was cute little critter. You...

When you see'd me, you just looked up and breathed as natural...

We took ya in and raised you like you were our'n.

Course, we could have took you to an orphans home, but... the wind was howlin'...

You mean to say that Wyoming Steve Gibson is your step-son?

Yeah, step-son! We mean to say that!

And we need to have you get out and take this publicity hound with you!

Thought you could prove everything you said, wise guy? I can! They're lyin'!

Tell it to Sweeney! You came in with us. You can go out with us.

After that, we're not responsible for you. Come on.

Hey, Elly! Elly! Gee, I'm glad to see you again!

You better take your friend to the next room.

Jeff! Jeff! You just got here in time. I know you won't go back on me.

Tell these people your folks is lyin'!

Now gentlemen, my artist can't stand the strain any longer.

Wait a minute! Who are you? I object!

Jeff Hardy. Hardy? Are these folks your parents?

I reckon they be!

Jeff! Quiet!

What relation is Wyoming Steve Gibson to you? I object!

Oh, go on, Jeff! Tell 'em the truth.

What relation is Steve Gibson to you? Step-brother!

It's a lie! The whole thing is a lie!

Gentlemen of the press, I give you Mr. And Mrs. Wyoming Steve Gibson!

Give me an aspirin!

Come out of it, Roy! Roy, don't take it that hard! Come on, Roy...

Read all about it! Wyoming Steve Gibson alleged fake!

Here, read all about it! Wyoming Steve Gibson an alleged fake!

Mr. Alvey, you're a businessman. You've produced some of the finest pictures in the business.

You're a man of insight, intellect, and perspective.

Hasn't it ever happened to you before where some crazy hick has made some derogatory remark about one of your artists over the radio just to gain notoriety and publicity for himself?

Chadwick, there's no use arguing. This man's become a laughingstock to the public.

And I can't afford to invest 4 or 5 hundred thousand dollars in a series of pictures starring him and have him laughed off the screen.

But WP, you've drawn up a contract for $1750 a week for him.

You can't very well tear it up! I can't? I have!

Eh, that's right, you have. Oh but Mr. Alvey, think what it'll mean to his public.

Think what it'll mean to his Cornies Hour! And I'll tell you something else.

It's gonna look like you don't think he's a real bona fide cowboy.

Well, frankly, I don't! WP, how can you say that?

Do you want that boy to grow up to hate you?

Now you just concentrate, just for a minute. Just for a minute!

Can't you hear the prairie in his voice when he sings?

Well, maybe I can hear the prairie, but I can't see him on it!

And as a matter of fact, come to think of it,

I can't remember ever hearing of his being on a horse or throwing a rope!

Where is he going to ride a horse in New York City? Central Park?

The bridle paths are full of baby carriages!

One year ago, he wanted to join the mounted police force in New York City, and I said no.

Pictures is the place for you! Look, WP, you've heard him sing, you've seen his test.

Why don't you sign up to a contract? Take him out to the coast.

Once you see him in a saddle, you'll think he's Pa Neville!

Well, I'll tell you what I'll do.

I'll give him a chance to prove whether or not he's got anything right here in New York.

And he has, I'll pull a fresh contract out of my pocket and we'll sign it on the spot.

I don't know what you mean. What are you talking about?

The rodeo. It opens tonight at Madison Square Garden.

Now you bring Gibson there. Let him show me some fast riding.

And if he can throw a steer, we'll do business!

Now you can take it or leave it.

Well, how about it?

I'll be at the Garden tonight. Will you be there with Gibson or not?

WP, we'll be there if we have to break my... his... ...if we have to break our necks!

Just came from Alvey's office. He tore up the contract, but he's gonna give us another one.

Gonna give us another chance, and we're going to take it!

Well then, what do we gotta do, eh? You're ridin' in the rodeo at the Garden tonight!

What? What? He's never seen you ride.

He wants see you bulldoze a steer. Now now Roy, now wait a minute.

How do you bulldoze a steer? Well, they run a wild steer out of a chute.

You're on a bucking bronco. You gallop to the steer,

dive out of the saddle, grab him by the horns,

wrestle with him, throw him down, and tie up his legs, that's all.

Oh, I ride a bronco? And a steer? Oh no, Roy! No!

Come on. Let me up!

What is this? Come in!

What's goin' on here?

Hey Jane! Make 'em let me up. It's two against one.

Well I reckon if them's the odds, I better go git Jeff!

Oh, wait a minute! We're not mad at him, honest!

But it's a case of life and death! Yeah, his life and my death!

They want me to ride in a rodeo!

He's got to, to keep... I'm tired of bein' a cowboy!

I got a phobia! Yeah, he's got a phobia!

Couple of aspirin and he'll be all right!

Public doesn't think he can ride. We know he can't ride.

If we get him on a horse in the Garden, he'll make all the difference. We're all set!

Wait, I reckon I got the solution.

Well look, if you're thinking of using a double, it's no go,

because they want pictures and everything! That's right! They wanna see, too.

Now tether your horses, just a minute! Let me git on the telephone.

Don't get the telephone! Get the police!

Hello, git me Prof. Landis at the 43rd Street Theater, please.

Now Elly, sit down and make yourself comfortable.

Bring a chair. Now fellas, I don't like this...

Sit down, Elly. Now relax. Forget everything that's on your mind.

Yeah, well how can I do that? I don't like this idea, Jane!

It's essential that you have absolute faith in me...

...in my ability to open your mind to suggestion.

I'm going to help, Elly. Remember that! I'm going to help you.

Yeah, well I think I'm gonna get some bail money ready!

Quiet! Wanna make a fool out of the professor?

Now Elly, If you'll just rest your chin on the desk so that your nose touches the end of that white line.

Now follow my finger...

No, I've changed my mind!

Now Elly, don't be scared. It ain't gonna hurt.

I reckon the professor's done this lots of times to other people.

Mostly to chickens.

However, in Elly's case, I'm using this method to place the experiment on a lower plain.

Shucks, Elly! I know'd you had some kind of sickness, but I never figured you was a coward.

I ain't no coward! I got a phobia!

Now Elly, rest your chin on the desk, follow my finger.

Well, I still wish I was back with The Three Sharps!

That's right. Now focus all your attention on the chalk line. Concentrate.

Pretty soon you won't be able to concentrate anymore and you'll want to fall asleep.

What time is it? 25 minutes to nine.

No, we're never gonna make it.

Now, I want you to get very tired. I want you to get very very sleepy.

Now, you're absolutely relaxed... you're beginning to get tired.

You're in another world. You're now passing into a beautiful sleep.

You can't hear anyone else's voice but mine.

You won't be able to do anything unless I tell you to do it...

Sleep... sleep...

You're not afraid of animals anymore.

If you wanted to, you could throw a roaring bull with your bare hands.

You're free of fear, Elly. You're free because I command you to be free!

You're going right over that rodeo and you're gonna ride a horse!

You can ride now! Horses, broncos, steers, anything!

You're not afraid of animals, do you hear?

You're a cowboy, and I command you to ride at that rodeo!

It's workin'!

I command you to ride at that rodeo!

Yipee! Yipee! Yipee! Gimme my boots! Gimme my hat, kid!

Gimme my hat! Wyoming Steve Gibson rides again!

Yipee! Yipee! I'm a ridin' man!

Yipee! Yipee!

Oh gee! I hope he don't git killed!

How long you reckon he'll stay hypnotized, Professor?

It's hard to say. Maybe hours, maybe days, maybe weeks.

Ain't there nothin' that'll bring him out of it before that?

Oh yes, a sharp physical blow, a sudden physical reaction, a fit of coughing, a sneeze.

I hope I haven't done anything wrong. Wrong! Professor, you're wonderful!

Roy, listen! We gotta get over to the Garden before that wears off!

What's wrong with him, Professor? Look at his eyes!

Yipee. Yipee! Yahoooo!

Ride 'em, cowboy! Ride 'em into the ground!

Holy smokes, Professor! You hypnotized Wyoming, and this guy's caught it!

Gimme my hat! Yipee! Gimme my gun! Gimme my saddle!

Out of the way, half-breed! Now wait a minute, Roy. Take it easy!

WB Alvey's over there at the Garden in a box waiting for us.

Give me a bronco... Yahoo!

I'm gonna bring you out of this. Stand back now. I'm gonna git you shootin'!

Come on, Jane! Let's take care of Wyoming.

Look, Mr. Chadwick, we're your friends.

Sure pardner, you're my friend. You're a fine hombre!

But me a Bess here are headed for the mountains!

Who do you think you are?

I know who I am! I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson!

Get me out of this here corral!

That'll teach you critters to stand back thar! I'm headed for the last wind-up.

Oh Mr. Chadwick... Oh, sneakin' up on me, eh?

All right, you thought you had me surrounded, didn't ya?

Hey! We gotta git to the Garden!

Come Will. We must go to Elly.

Yipee! Watch them thar redskins! I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson!

Don't you think this is a little too much for your nerves, WP?

Nonsense! The greatest audience stuff I ever saw! Look at this mob eat it up!

I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson, straight from the prairie!

Want to enter this contest? I want to enter it and I'm gonna win it!

All right, we're bull-doggin'. That's fine by me.

Wait a minute, wait a minute!

Wyoming Steve Gibson has just ridden into the arena in true western style!

Well, here's a surprise! Wyoming is going to enter the bulldogging contest!

Hang on, Elly! Come on, Elly!

I'm the roughest maverick... Yahoo!

Come on, Elly!

Ladies and gentlemen, a new world's record!

Wyoming Steve Gibson, bulldogging champion of the world!

I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson! It's a lie! I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson!

I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson! Mr. Chadwick, you just missed it!

Elly just broke the world's record for bulldoggin'! He's the new world's champion!

Chadwick, he's sensational! I've got a new contract right here in my pocket. Here, have it signed.

Sign what? Who? Wyoming Steve Gibson, Roy.

I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson! The man is an impostor!

Roy, what's the matter with you? Why, you act like you're hypnotized!

Actin'! He is! Roy, snap out of it...

Wait a minute! Hold everything!

If Roy's hypnotized, I know how to bring him out of it.

I just went through that myself.

I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson! Roy!...

Hi, Wyoming. Hi, Roy.

Glad to see ya! Glad to see you, Roy.

I just came from Alvey's office. Oh, you did? Well, glad you came down here.

Glad I came down... I, uh.. Hey, hey, what's going on here?

For Mr. Gibson. Have this signed and stop you nodding.

Well, what is it?

It's the biggest contract you've ever dreamed about, for Wyoming Steve Gibson!

Why didn't you say so, boys! Why crowd me? Why crowd me?

Wyoming, will you pose for some pictures for me?

That okay, Roy? Pose for everything!

Any kind of a picture! Every paper!

Here you are. Here, I want Wyoming to sign it!

Wyoming, get up on the fence. The two of us?

Now get closer together.

Now put your arm around her. Put your head on his shoulder.

Here you are, Wyoming. Sign right here.

What is it, Roy? Contract with WP Alvey.

Okay boys, let 'er go! Shoot!

Thanks. Okay boys. Hey Roy, where ya goin'?

I'm gonna put that hypnotist under contract! Oh!...

What's the matter, Elly? Oh shucks, I thought I'd broke his neck.

I guess they're just... I reckon!

I reckon they're just takin' him out for water.

I'm Wyoming Steve Gibson!