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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,707 --> 00:00:04,331 All right, I'm getting my list together 2 00:00:04,356 --> 00:00:06,300 for my annual Costco trip: 3 00:00:07,832 --> 00:00:11,277 cheese doodles, cheese balls, cheese puffs, cheese curls... 4 00:00:11,694 --> 00:00:12,810 What am I missing? 5 00:00:12,850 --> 00:00:14,220 Cheese. 6 00:00:14,703 --> 00:00:16,303 What would I do without you? 7 00:00:16,760 --> 00:00:18,081 Not have cheese. 8 00:00:19,656 --> 00:00:21,896 Fleetwood Mac! 9 00:00:21,921 --> 00:00:23,113 Oh, this is fun. 10 00:00:23,138 --> 00:00:25,042 Are we just hollering out band names? 11 00:00:25,067 --> 00:00:26,832 Sugar Ray! 12 00:00:26,857 --> 00:00:29,417 No, no, no. Remember, I got you, me, and Charlie tickets 13 00:00:29,442 --> 00:00:31,650 to the Fleetwood Mac farewell tour for tonight. 14 00:00:31,675 --> 00:00:35,064 Oh, yay, so much fun. 15 00:00:35,089 --> 00:00:36,285 I can't go. 16 00:00:37,277 --> 00:00:40,809 My ex-wife Bonnie is coming in from Texas to meet John. 17 00:00:40,834 --> 00:00:42,942 But I did pay you for the tickets, didn't I? 18 00:00:42,967 --> 00:00:45,061 - No, you didn't. - Oh, thank God. 19 00:00:46,163 --> 00:00:47,963 But we're still going, right, Margaret? 20 00:00:47,988 --> 00:00:51,206 I mean, I lent Christine McVie a sweater back in 1972. 21 00:00:51,231 --> 00:00:53,676 - I'd like to get it back. - Well, yes, we're going. 22 00:00:53,701 --> 00:00:56,146 I cleaned out my daughter's college fund to pay for these tickets. 23 00:00:56,170 --> 00:00:57,498 I mean, she's 35 years old. 24 00:00:57,538 --> 00:00:59,097 I think that ship has sailed. 25 00:01:00,198 --> 00:01:02,478 Anyway, I'm gonna go check out the Shady Meadows van, 26 00:01:02,508 --> 00:01:05,004 - and we should be good to go. - Uh, sorry, Margaret, 27 00:01:05,029 --> 00:01:07,648 the big van has been checked out by the big man. 28 00:01:07,678 --> 00:01:09,318 I'm going to Costco. 29 00:01:09,343 --> 00:01:10,934 Ooh, that reminds me. 30 00:01:10,959 --> 00:01:12,434 Here's five dollars. 31 00:01:12,459 --> 00:01:14,981 Would you get me a hundred pairs of socks? Tube. 32 00:01:16,088 --> 00:01:18,112 But, Hank, this is great. Sid just bailed. 33 00:01:18,137 --> 00:01:20,458 You can take his ticket and drive us to Fleetwood Mac. 34 00:01:20,488 --> 00:01:22,558 Fleetwood Mac? I hate that guy. 35 00:01:22,598 --> 00:01:24,198 It's not a guy, it's a group. 36 00:01:24,228 --> 00:01:26,198 All right. I hate those guys. 37 00:01:26,228 --> 00:01:27,797 Oh, come on, Hank. Please? 38 00:01:27,822 --> 00:01:30,298 My daughter was conceived at a Fleetwood Mac concert. 39 00:01:30,338 --> 00:01:32,708 That's why her middle name is Tusk. 40 00:01:33,164 --> 00:01:34,844 Anyway, it's their farewell tour, 41 00:01:34,869 --> 00:01:36,903 and they're my favorite band of all time. 42 00:01:36,928 --> 00:01:38,942 All right, but we going shopping first. 43 00:01:38,967 --> 00:01:41,437 And I get 80% of all your free samples. 44 00:01:41,548 --> 00:01:44,178 Okay, 70%. I'm not a monster. 45 00:01:44,218 --> 00:01:46,218 Oh! 46 00:01:46,248 --> 00:01:48,048 Bonnie is already here. 47 00:01:48,088 --> 00:01:50,688 Oh, I hope she and John get along. 48 00:01:50,718 --> 00:01:54,290 It may be a rom-com cliché, but I want my ex-wife 49 00:01:54,315 --> 00:01:56,658 and my boyfriend to like each other. 50 00:01:56,698 --> 00:01:58,805 There's my little man. 51 00:02:04,268 --> 00:02:06,438 You come here, you munchkin. 52 00:02:07,003 --> 00:02:08,973 Get yourself a face full of Bonbon. 53 00:02:12,376 --> 00:02:15,683 I forgot how much air I need just to hug you. 54 00:02:17,118 --> 00:02:19,330 Are those hugs going around the table? 55 00:02:19,355 --> 00:02:22,488 'Cause I can hold my breath an awfully long time. 56 00:02:44,995 --> 00:02:47,498 - Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com - 57 00:02:47,523 --> 00:02:49,623 Check me out. 58 00:02:49,648 --> 00:02:52,623 - My Stevie Nicks outfit still fits. - Whoa. 59 00:02:52,648 --> 00:02:55,588 Course, then again, I guess blousy witch clothing 60 00:02:55,618 --> 00:02:57,486 always does. 61 00:02:57,511 --> 00:02:59,218 So, are you ready to party? 62 00:02:59,258 --> 00:03:00,888 Oh, yeah, I am. I got us covered. 63 00:03:00,928 --> 00:03:04,291 I got some weed gummies and some joints. 64 00:03:04,316 --> 00:03:06,916 - Mm-hmm. - And some weed gummies 65 00:03:07,451 --> 00:03:09,154 and some joints. 66 00:03:10,168 --> 00:03:13,638 I started already. 67 00:03:13,668 --> 00:03:15,938 I'm packing a bunch of airplane tequila bottles. 68 00:03:15,968 --> 00:03:17,938 It's my last chance to see Fleetwood Mac 69 00:03:17,978 --> 00:03:20,168 and I am gonna be lit. 70 00:03:20,722 --> 00:03:24,148 All right, before we head out, I've laid down some ground rules 71 00:03:24,178 --> 00:03:25,678 for the Shady Meadow van. 72 00:03:25,718 --> 00:03:28,648 Since when does the Shady Meadows van have rules? 73 00:03:28,688 --> 00:03:31,408 Patty Soupkins checks it out every single week so she 74 00:03:31,433 --> 00:03:33,888 and her boyfriend can have sex out there in the parking lot. 75 00:03:35,747 --> 00:03:38,487 Well, that may be, but I just got my van privileges back 76 00:03:38,512 --> 00:03:40,603 after that unfortunate incident 77 00:03:40,628 --> 00:03:42,786 where, through no fault of my own, 78 00:03:42,811 --> 00:03:45,287 I drove a golf cart through the wall in the dining hall. 79 00:03:46,738 --> 00:03:49,368 No food in the van. 80 00:03:49,408 --> 00:03:52,138 No drink in the van. 81 00:03:52,178 --> 00:03:55,478 No loud talking in the van. 82 00:03:55,508 --> 00:04:00,188 Come on, Hank. We're going to a concert, not a church retreat. 83 00:04:00,218 --> 00:04:02,018 Don't ruin this for me. 84 00:04:02,048 --> 00:04:04,139 We should be cutting loose. Who knows? 85 00:04:04,164 --> 00:04:06,834 I might take my top off and let the girls breathe. 86 00:04:07,188 --> 00:04:09,228 Yeah, come on, Hank, chill out. 87 00:04:09,258 --> 00:04:10,831 You're harshing our buzz. 88 00:04:11,268 --> 00:04:13,998 Nobody should be buzzing in this van. 89 00:04:17,026 --> 00:04:18,902 Unless y'all plan on bringing bees. 90 00:04:21,068 --> 00:04:22,578 No bees. 91 00:04:23,408 --> 00:04:24,808 And, uh, definitely no drugs. 92 00:04:24,838 --> 00:04:26,508 My van, my rules. 93 00:04:26,548 --> 00:04:28,508 - Okay, you got it. - Yeah, we don't... 94 00:04:28,548 --> 00:04:32,378 we don't have anything. M-Music is our drug. 95 00:04:32,418 --> 00:04:34,110 Don't make me frisk you two. 96 00:04:34,135 --> 00:04:37,688 I will be thorough, but I will not be gentle. 97 00:04:38,329 --> 00:04:39,688 Okay. Here. 98 00:04:40,928 --> 00:04:42,720 That's all of it. 99 00:04:47,628 --> 00:04:50,598 You are going to love John. 100 00:04:50,638 --> 00:04:53,408 He is so handsome and smart. 101 00:04:53,438 --> 00:04:55,147 He was on Jeopardy! once. 102 00:04:55,172 --> 00:04:58,538 That's right, front row of the audience. 103 00:04:58,578 --> 00:05:01,678 Well, you keep going on and on and on about him. 104 00:05:01,708 --> 00:05:04,201 I'm almost just a little bit extremely jealous. 105 00:05:05,318 --> 00:05:07,913 There he is. 106 00:05:07,938 --> 00:05:09,407 Ooh! 107 00:05:09,432 --> 00:05:11,999 My boyfriend is meeting my wife. 108 00:05:12,024 --> 00:05:13,963 I feel so French. 109 00:05:13,988 --> 00:05:16,088 Bonnie, meet Johnny. 110 00:05:16,128 --> 00:05:18,128 It's so nice to finally meet you. 111 00:05:18,158 --> 00:05:19,900 Wow! You're a knockout. 112 00:05:19,925 --> 00:05:22,098 I know. Yeah. 113 00:05:22,128 --> 00:05:24,068 - And you're not so bad yourself. - Thanks. 114 00:05:24,098 --> 00:05:26,098 Isn't he cute? 115 00:05:26,138 --> 00:05:30,324 John just moved back from a very prestigious job 116 00:05:30,349 --> 00:05:31,378 in Atlanta. 117 00:05:31,408 --> 00:05:33,169 - Ah... - Tell her 118 00:05:33,194 --> 00:05:36,473 about your prestigious job, John. 119 00:05:36,498 --> 00:05:39,308 I worked at the CDC as a caterer. 120 00:05:41,018 --> 00:05:44,955 Oh, I love Atlanta. 121 00:05:44,980 --> 00:05:47,420 Yeah, we, uh, went there for our anniversary last year. 122 00:05:47,658 --> 00:05:51,828 Wait, you guys still celebrate your anniversary? 123 00:05:51,858 --> 00:05:53,828 - Every year. - What? 124 00:05:53,868 --> 00:05:55,482 Yeah, we make a great team. 125 00:05:55,747 --> 00:05:59,068 - Hmm... Ah. - Yeah, we were cheerleaders together in high school. 126 00:05:59,098 --> 00:06:01,569 I was the base of the pyramid and he was the top. 127 00:06:02,099 --> 00:06:05,359 I've had a lot of great times on top of this lady. 128 00:06:05,978 --> 00:06:08,308 If only! 129 00:06:08,348 --> 00:06:10,948 Ah! Oh, oh... 130 00:06:10,978 --> 00:06:13,618 Oh, isn't he hilarious? Oh, wait, watch this. 131 00:06:13,648 --> 00:06:15,381 Hey, Sid, make a funny face. 132 00:06:15,406 --> 00:06:17,088 Okay. Uh... 133 00:06:19,518 --> 00:06:21,917 Oh, my God, 134 00:06:21,942 --> 00:06:24,925 gold! 24-karat gold! 135 00:06:27,168 --> 00:06:30,218 You guys get along so well together, it's almost a shame 136 00:06:30,243 --> 00:06:31,790 that you ever got divorced. 137 00:06:32,407 --> 00:06:35,368 Oh, yeah... well, we're not. No, we're still married. 138 00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,240 I'm sorry, what? 139 00:06:42,678 --> 00:06:45,448 So, I guess... 140 00:06:45,478 --> 00:06:47,288 I'm a little confused. 141 00:06:47,318 --> 00:06:49,388 You two are still married? 142 00:06:49,418 --> 00:06:52,688 Well, define "married." 143 00:06:52,728 --> 00:06:54,534 Being married. 144 00:06:55,798 --> 00:06:57,729 Oh, well, then, yes. 145 00:07:00,481 --> 00:07:03,803 Ooh, you're jealous. 146 00:07:03,828 --> 00:07:05,888 You feel like my mistress. 147 00:07:05,913 --> 00:07:08,513 My dirty little side piece. 148 00:07:08,668 --> 00:07:12,139 Uh, the Marilyn to my JFK. 149 00:07:12,164 --> 00:07:15,030 I am not jealous. 150 00:07:15,678 --> 00:07:18,962 And between the two of us, you are definitely the Marilyn. 151 00:07:19,424 --> 00:07:22,494 And that is why we work. 152 00:07:23,118 --> 00:07:26,858 Look, I know my relationship with Bonnie is unconventional, 153 00:07:26,888 --> 00:07:29,028 but it works for us. 154 00:07:29,058 --> 00:07:31,028 Changing that would hurt her. 155 00:07:31,058 --> 00:07:33,513 I feel I've already hurt her enough. 156 00:07:33,538 --> 00:07:35,768 - What are you talking about? - I feel guilty 157 00:07:35,798 --> 00:07:38,998 that I pretended to be straight for decades. 158 00:07:39,023 --> 00:07:42,640 She thought she was getting G.I. Joe, but she got Malibu Ken. 159 00:07:44,187 --> 00:07:45,578 Well, don't you think 160 00:07:46,203 --> 00:07:48,304 you're hurting her by keeping her stuck in the past? 161 00:07:48,329 --> 00:07:50,822 I mean, has she even had a relationship since you? 162 00:07:50,847 --> 00:07:52,096 Not really. 163 00:07:52,121 --> 00:07:53,891 Well, there was this one really great guy, 164 00:07:53,916 --> 00:07:56,858 but he dumped her when he found out we were still married. 165 00:07:57,963 --> 00:07:59,002 Oh... 166 00:08:01,846 --> 00:08:03,728 - Oh... - Sid. 167 00:08:03,758 --> 00:08:06,928 I don't want to force you to do anything 168 00:08:06,968 --> 00:08:08,428 that you don't want to do. 169 00:08:08,468 --> 00:08:10,198 - But don't you think... - No, no, no. 170 00:08:10,238 --> 00:08:11,274 You're right. 171 00:08:11,838 --> 00:08:14,478 We should have done this a long time ago. 172 00:08:15,806 --> 00:08:18,078 I'm gonna ask her for a divorce. 173 00:08:18,108 --> 00:08:19,138 Okay. 174 00:08:20,508 --> 00:08:22,478 You don't happen to have a helmet, do you? 175 00:08:22,508 --> 00:08:25,748 She's got a Southern temper, I got a soft head. 176 00:08:30,188 --> 00:08:31,988 What the hell, Hank? 177 00:08:32,018 --> 00:08:34,312 I thought you said it was gonna be a quick trip to Costco. 178 00:08:34,337 --> 00:08:35,728 That took forever. 179 00:08:35,758 --> 00:08:38,619 We watched you get an eye exam. 180 00:08:39,528 --> 00:08:41,212 Can we at least turn on some music 181 00:08:41,237 --> 00:08:43,498 - and get this party started? - You got it. 182 00:08:46,901 --> 00:08:49,276 Maybe at a volume that humans can hear? 183 00:08:49,894 --> 00:08:52,064 Oh, sure. I turn the music up, then I start doing 184 00:08:52,089 --> 00:08:53,448 a little dance in the front seat. 185 00:08:53,478 --> 00:08:55,054 Next thing you know, we're plummeting 186 00:08:55,079 --> 00:08:56,648 off a bridge to our death. 187 00:08:56,678 --> 00:08:58,148 And on top of all of that, 188 00:08:58,178 --> 00:09:00,318 I lose my Shady Meadow van privileges. 189 00:09:03,658 --> 00:09:05,088 This sucks, right? 190 00:09:05,118 --> 00:09:07,759 Big time. We have no tequila, we have no weed, 191 00:09:07,784 --> 00:09:09,528 we're gonna miss the opening act 192 00:09:09,558 --> 00:09:12,459 'cause Grandpa Moses up there won't go over 35. 193 00:09:12,484 --> 00:09:13,971 All right, brace yourselves, everybody. 194 00:09:13,995 --> 00:09:16,381 We may be coming to a speed bump. 195 00:09:18,738 --> 00:09:21,668 You know, I think I can solve one of those problems. 196 00:09:21,708 --> 00:09:25,278 I have a... a secret stash of gummies. 197 00:09:25,308 --> 00:09:28,378 Oh, my God, Charlie, this is amazing. 198 00:09:28,408 --> 00:09:30,524 A little less amazing that you pulled it out of your crotch, 199 00:09:30,548 --> 00:09:31,878 but I'm desperate. 200 00:09:31,918 --> 00:09:33,845 Yeah, they should be nice and warm. 201 00:09:33,870 --> 00:09:36,670 Yeah, they're a little too warm. Are you okay? 202 00:09:36,918 --> 00:09:38,494 What's going on back there? Y'all eating? 203 00:09:38,518 --> 00:09:41,658 You know the rules. No eating in the van. 204 00:09:41,688 --> 00:09:44,128 I am not gonna let him ruin this night. 205 00:09:44,158 --> 00:09:46,211 Here, Hank, want some candy? 206 00:09:46,236 --> 00:09:49,698 Uh, yeah. Amendment to that previous rule: 207 00:09:49,728 --> 00:09:51,968 the driver's allowed to eat. 208 00:09:51,998 --> 00:09:53,068 Especially candy. 209 00:09:54,115 --> 00:09:55,646 Ooh. It's nice and warm. 210 00:09:57,278 --> 00:09:58,646 But he's driving. 211 00:09:58,671 --> 00:10:00,490 It's one little gummy... it won't even kick in 212 00:10:00,515 --> 00:10:01,948 till we get there. 213 00:10:03,518 --> 00:10:06,106 Oh, crap. 214 00:10:11,758 --> 00:10:14,388 What is going on with your feet, Bonnie? 215 00:10:14,428 --> 00:10:18,611 I've never seen a pedicurist tap out before. 216 00:10:18,636 --> 00:10:21,336 Oh, come on, honey. You know me. 217 00:10:21,768 --> 00:10:24,068 My toes are like a carton of eggs. 218 00:10:24,098 --> 00:10:26,968 All 12 went bad at the same time. 219 00:10:29,068 --> 00:10:32,108 Now, Sid, you said you wanted to talk to me about something. 220 00:10:32,138 --> 00:10:33,548 What is it? 221 00:10:33,573 --> 00:10:36,423 Why don't we whip up some juleps 222 00:10:36,448 --> 00:10:39,027 and I'll rub your shoulders first? 223 00:10:39,052 --> 00:10:40,218 Aw... 224 00:10:40,248 --> 00:10:43,367 Are you trying to knock me up again? 225 00:10:43,392 --> 00:10:46,890 Ha! You, madam, are a card. 226 00:10:47,242 --> 00:10:50,528 And that card, madam, is the Joker, 227 00:10:50,558 --> 00:10:53,728 which is the funniest of the cards. 228 00:10:53,768 --> 00:10:56,398 However, you're also my queen. 229 00:10:57,503 --> 00:10:59,690 Pick a card, any card. 230 00:10:59,715 --> 00:11:02,042 Oh, regardless, you are aces. 231 00:11:03,778 --> 00:11:07,648 Come on, Sid. Spit it out. I know when you're stalling. 232 00:11:09,178 --> 00:11:11,478 I think we should get a divorce. 233 00:11:14,518 --> 00:11:16,818 Hmm... 234 00:11:16,848 --> 00:11:20,158 Is that a good "hmm" or a bad "hmm"? 235 00:11:20,188 --> 00:11:23,358 Oh, I think it's a bad "hmm." 236 00:11:25,328 --> 00:11:27,168 You don't want to be married to me? 237 00:11:27,198 --> 00:11:28,912 Oh, my God, I'm gonna faint. 238 00:11:28,937 --> 00:11:31,268 The walls are closing in. 239 00:11:31,298 --> 00:11:32,896 Bonnie, calm down, please. 240 00:11:32,921 --> 00:11:35,681 - Or at least break some of my cheaper items. - Oh, my God. 241 00:11:36,008 --> 00:11:37,738 Oh! 242 00:11:37,778 --> 00:11:39,669 How can I calm down when you're trying 243 00:11:39,694 --> 00:11:41,248 to cut me out of your life? 244 00:11:41,278 --> 00:11:43,261 I don't want you out of my life. 245 00:11:43,286 --> 00:11:46,050 Then why are you saying all of this? 246 00:11:46,075 --> 00:11:48,261 Because... because I'm... 247 00:11:49,148 --> 00:11:51,558 John is making me. 248 00:11:54,820 --> 00:11:56,180 John? 249 00:11:57,128 --> 00:11:59,028 Oh, my God. 250 00:11:59,956 --> 00:12:02,769 I shouldn't have spent all this money on this pedicure... 251 00:12:04,066 --> 00:12:06,768 when I'm gonna break my foot off in his ass. 252 00:12:06,793 --> 00:12:08,513 No, Bonnie, no. 253 00:12:08,538 --> 00:12:12,028 He doesn't even live here, thank God. 254 00:12:12,053 --> 00:12:13,729 Hey, it's me, John. 255 00:12:23,714 --> 00:12:25,644 John told you to divorce me? 256 00:12:25,988 --> 00:12:29,128 - Oh, I'm gonna rip him limb from limb. - No, no, wait, wait! 257 00:12:29,158 --> 00:12:30,603 I'm on your side! 258 00:12:30,628 --> 00:12:33,058 He does deserve a good limb-ripping. 259 00:12:33,368 --> 00:12:36,028 But you just got your nails done. 260 00:12:36,068 --> 00:12:38,073 So why don't you let me handle it. 261 00:12:38,098 --> 00:12:39,738 You stay put. Stay. 262 00:12:40,568 --> 00:12:42,338 Hey, sweetie. 263 00:12:42,368 --> 00:12:44,508 Oh, so you're coming out here. 264 00:12:44,538 --> 00:12:48,611 Well, I wanted to tell you the good news... 265 00:12:48,636 --> 00:12:50,306 - What? - ...before we went inside. 266 00:12:50,548 --> 00:12:52,978 I told Bonnie about the divorce. 267 00:12:53,018 --> 00:12:54,548 And she loved it. 268 00:12:56,218 --> 00:13:00,588 She is a big fan of yours, by the way. 269 00:13:00,628 --> 00:13:03,743 Oh, I think you two are gonna be so much happier this way. 270 00:13:03,768 --> 00:13:06,368 So much happier. 271 00:13:06,528 --> 00:13:08,198 Oh, she is so... 272 00:13:08,228 --> 00:13:10,868 friggin' happy in there. 273 00:13:10,898 --> 00:13:12,668 Okay. 274 00:13:13,463 --> 00:13:14,627 Having said that... 275 00:13:17,708 --> 00:13:21,378 ...um, let's not mention the divorce. 276 00:13:21,408 --> 00:13:24,248 - No? - I'm worried about her getting too happy. 277 00:13:24,278 --> 00:13:26,548 Okay, um... 278 00:13:26,578 --> 00:13:28,118 yeah, could we, um... 279 00:13:28,148 --> 00:13:31,089 go inside, or, or are we just hallway people now? 280 00:13:31,114 --> 00:13:32,144 Oh, oh, dude, 281 00:13:32,169 --> 00:13:35,114 we are going in there so, so soon. 282 00:13:35,139 --> 00:13:37,249 Just give me one sec. 283 00:13:37,428 --> 00:13:39,098 I love you. Lost a little weight? 284 00:13:39,128 --> 00:13:41,098 Have you? 285 00:13:42,128 --> 00:13:44,821 Welp, I bitched him out. 286 00:13:44,846 --> 00:13:48,386 I told him to mind his own beeswax. 287 00:13:48,668 --> 00:13:52,078 Long story short, he loved it. 288 00:13:53,248 --> 00:13:55,248 Big fan of yours, by the way. 289 00:13:55,278 --> 00:13:58,078 - Oh... - Anyhoo. 290 00:13:58,118 --> 00:14:01,148 Guess there's no reason to talk about the divorce 291 00:14:01,188 --> 00:14:04,218 now that it's been handled, but just give me one sec. 292 00:14:04,243 --> 00:14:06,992 Oh, and here he comes. 293 00:14:07,017 --> 00:14:09,506 Just walked right in. Uh, that's fine. 294 00:14:09,531 --> 00:14:10,728 Little rude. 295 00:14:10,758 --> 00:14:12,804 Sid, your place looks wrecked. 296 00:14:13,523 --> 00:14:16,428 - Oh. His house is wrecked? - Mm-hmm. 297 00:14:16,468 --> 00:14:19,068 Oh, ironic, coming from someone like you. 298 00:14:19,098 --> 00:14:20,380 - Whore. - Oh! 299 00:14:20,405 --> 00:14:22,705 Okay, hold on, did I do something wrong? 300 00:14:22,968 --> 00:14:25,457 Yeah. You forced him to ask for 301 00:14:25,482 --> 00:14:26,952 a divorce that he doesn't even want. 302 00:14:26,977 --> 00:14:28,447 - What? - What are you talking about? 303 00:14:28,472 --> 00:14:30,004 I didn't force him to do anything. 304 00:14:30,029 --> 00:14:31,493 And this is what he wants. 305 00:14:31,518 --> 00:14:33,648 What?! 306 00:14:35,549 --> 00:14:37,447 Well, this is great. 307 00:14:37,472 --> 00:14:39,206 My gummy hasn't kicked in, 308 00:14:39,231 --> 00:14:41,266 the concert is starting, and we're stuck here 309 00:14:41,291 --> 00:14:43,201 on the side of the road with this space cadet 310 00:14:43,226 --> 00:14:44,874 who is too high to drive. 311 00:14:45,828 --> 00:14:47,628 Hank, where are the keys? 312 00:14:47,668 --> 00:14:50,098 Have my hands always been this huge? 313 00:14:50,128 --> 00:14:52,468 I got Hulk-like hands up in here. 314 00:14:52,493 --> 00:14:54,417 I think I can lift this submarine. 315 00:14:55,466 --> 00:14:57,006 I'm doing it! 316 00:14:57,031 --> 00:14:58,655 It's not even that heavy. 317 00:14:59,378 --> 00:15:01,827 Did he just say submarine? 318 00:15:02,848 --> 00:15:03,848 Hi, fishy. 319 00:15:06,526 --> 00:15:09,291 Okay, I got this. I'm gonna talk him down. 320 00:15:09,316 --> 00:15:10,556 Get those keys back. 321 00:15:10,688 --> 00:15:13,743 Back in the day, I guided John Belushi, 322 00:15:13,768 --> 00:15:15,838 Jimi Hendrix, and Jim Morrison through 323 00:15:15,863 --> 00:15:17,933 some pretty gnarly waters. 324 00:15:18,258 --> 00:15:20,228 Those people are all dead, Charlie. 325 00:15:20,268 --> 00:15:21,768 From drug overdoses. 326 00:15:26,668 --> 00:15:27,763 Hey, buddy. 327 00:15:28,168 --> 00:15:29,497 I'm the captain of this vessel. 328 00:15:29,522 --> 00:15:30,752 You will refer to me as "sir." 329 00:15:32,793 --> 00:15:34,178 Well, um... 330 00:15:34,208 --> 00:15:35,504 Here's the deal, sir. 331 00:15:36,248 --> 00:15:39,648 Um, you may have, through no fault of your own, 332 00:15:39,678 --> 00:15:41,348 ingested some marijuana. 333 00:15:42,388 --> 00:15:44,518 But, luckily, I am here to help. 334 00:15:44,558 --> 00:15:47,719 And the submarine that you're captaining is full of snacks. 335 00:15:47,945 --> 00:15:49,275 So if you want to feel better, 336 00:15:49,602 --> 00:15:51,470 - eat something. - You sure? 337 00:15:51,810 --> 00:15:53,211 Can I get a depth reading, please? 338 00:15:53,918 --> 00:15:56,018 Hank, we promise, he's right. 339 00:15:56,043 --> 00:15:57,699 Eating is the ticket. 340 00:15:57,724 --> 00:15:59,051 - Okay, I'll eat the tickets. - N-No! 341 00:15:59,075 --> 00:16:00,144 No, no, no, no. 342 00:16:00,169 --> 00:16:01,538 - No, no, no, no. - No, no, no. 343 00:16:01,568 --> 00:16:04,908 You're right, I'm feeling better already. 344 00:16:04,938 --> 00:16:07,748 Oh, no. 345 00:16:15,918 --> 00:16:17,518 There you are. 346 00:16:17,558 --> 00:16:20,021 I've been looking everywhere for you. 347 00:16:20,628 --> 00:16:23,075 Yeah, I came out here to calm down and 348 00:16:23,332 --> 00:16:25,032 dip my feet in the pool. 349 00:16:25,645 --> 00:16:27,427 But they asked me to take 'em out. 350 00:16:28,997 --> 00:16:30,247 Can we talk? 351 00:16:31,504 --> 00:16:32,786 This is all my fault. 352 00:16:33,188 --> 00:16:34,988 I should have been honest with you. 353 00:16:35,013 --> 00:16:36,483 And not hid behind John. 354 00:16:36,738 --> 00:16:39,425 But I don't want to hurt you anymore. 355 00:16:39,450 --> 00:16:42,698 I feel like I've already ruined your life. 356 00:16:43,926 --> 00:16:45,668 Is that what you think? 357 00:16:46,887 --> 00:16:48,715 You didn't ruin my life. 358 00:16:49,379 --> 00:16:50,754 You made it great. 359 00:16:51,472 --> 00:16:53,222 You made me laugh every day 360 00:16:53,247 --> 00:16:55,117 and you gave me a perfect son. 361 00:16:56,714 --> 00:16:58,158 He is great. 362 00:16:58,198 --> 00:17:00,603 Thank you for getting me blackout drunk 363 00:17:00,628 --> 00:17:02,543 - all those years ago. - Oh. 364 00:17:02,798 --> 00:17:05,080 Well, that's what wives are for. 365 00:17:06,668 --> 00:17:09,313 It makes me so sad that now 366 00:17:09,338 --> 00:17:10,808 you want me out of your life. 367 00:17:10,978 --> 00:17:13,308 No, I don't want that at all. 368 00:17:13,348 --> 00:17:16,248 I want you to be able to move on. 369 00:17:16,278 --> 00:17:19,578 You are a mega babe. 370 00:17:19,618 --> 00:17:22,547 You could still find that big love. 371 00:17:22,572 --> 00:17:24,542 I just don't want to stand in your way. 372 00:17:24,688 --> 00:17:27,458 And I don't want to stand in your way, either. 373 00:17:27,866 --> 00:17:30,188 I mean, John is great. And, 374 00:17:30,228 --> 00:17:31,251 you know, I-I think... 375 00:17:31,828 --> 00:17:33,328 we really have been just, you know, 376 00:17:33,353 --> 00:17:35,329 a teensy bit codependent. 377 00:17:36,298 --> 00:17:38,247 Just because we're getting a divorce doesn't mean 378 00:17:38,272 --> 00:17:40,712 that we won't always be family. 379 00:17:40,868 --> 00:17:43,268 I love you, Bonbon. 380 00:17:43,308 --> 00:17:44,708 Aw. 381 00:17:45,224 --> 00:17:46,380 Will you make me 382 00:17:46,612 --> 00:17:48,752 the happiest man in the world 383 00:17:48,777 --> 00:17:51,472 and become my ex-wife? 384 00:17:52,548 --> 00:17:54,118 I will. 385 00:17:54,148 --> 00:17:55,518 I will. 386 00:17:58,988 --> 00:18:00,558 Damn, girl! 387 00:18:00,588 --> 00:18:02,288 Whoo, those are lethal. 388 00:18:02,328 --> 00:18:04,698 You fogged me up. 389 00:18:07,217 --> 00:18:08,764 Well, I guess I'm not gonna get 390 00:18:08,789 --> 00:18:10,975 my sweater back from Christine McVie. 391 00:18:11,668 --> 00:18:13,758 I'm not gonna get to see Fleetwood Mac 392 00:18:13,783 --> 00:18:15,583 for the last time. 393 00:18:15,738 --> 00:18:19,138 Well, technically, you did see them for the last time. 394 00:18:19,178 --> 00:18:20,708 The last time you saw them. 395 00:18:20,748 --> 00:18:24,418 You just didn't know that was the last time, so... 396 00:18:24,448 --> 00:18:26,018 - This isn't helping, is it? - No. 397 00:18:26,048 --> 00:18:28,058 It's not just the concert. 398 00:18:28,083 --> 00:18:30,236 Just, we're getting to the point in our lives 399 00:18:30,261 --> 00:18:32,736 where there are gonna be a lot of last times. 400 00:18:33,428 --> 00:18:35,189 I guess that's one way to look at it. 401 00:18:36,358 --> 00:18:38,358 Or you could look at it 402 00:18:38,398 --> 00:18:41,503 as tonight was a night of first times. 403 00:18:42,417 --> 00:18:44,065 First time we got Hank high. 404 00:18:45,096 --> 00:18:46,440 First time we bought 405 00:18:46,465 --> 00:18:48,393 a bunch of toilet paper together. 406 00:18:49,438 --> 00:18:51,463 Um, first time we missed a concert 407 00:18:51,488 --> 00:18:53,281 because Hank ate the tickets. 408 00:18:54,413 --> 00:18:57,038 You know, we're gonna have a lot of first times together. 409 00:18:57,063 --> 00:18:58,070 Focus on that. 410 00:18:58,813 --> 00:19:01,023 I can't focus on anything right now. 411 00:19:01,048 --> 00:19:02,514 Oh, my speech blew your mind? 412 00:19:02,539 --> 00:19:05,217 No, my gummy just kicked in. 413 00:19:06,131 --> 00:19:07,499 Wowza. 414 00:19:07,524 --> 00:19:09,662 Charlie, Margaret. 415 00:19:09,686 --> 00:19:12,315 I found some of that Fleetwood Mac on the radio. 416 00:19:12,340 --> 00:19:14,184 I finally get why you like that guy. 417 00:19:14,209 --> 00:19:17,079 Wait a minute. This isn't Fleetwood Mac. 418 00:19:17,104 --> 00:19:18,743 Oh, let him have it. 419 00:19:18,768 --> 00:19:20,579 ♪ We built this city ♪ 420 00:19:22,259 --> 00:19:23,978 ♪ We built this city on ♪ 421 00:19:24,008 --> 00:19:26,638 ♪ Fleetwood Mac! ♪ 422 00:19:26,678 --> 00:19:28,948 ♪ We built this city ♪ 423 00:19:28,978 --> 00:19:32,248 ♪ We built this city on rock and roll ♪ 424 00:19:32,278 --> 00:19:33,848 ♪ Built this city ♪ 425 00:19:35,418 --> 00:19:37,218 ♪ We built this city ♪ 426 00:19:37,248 --> 00:19:40,318 ♪ On rock and roll ♪ 427 00:19:40,358 --> 00:19:42,158 ♪ We built this city ♪ 428 00:19:43,957 --> 00:19:45,397 ♪ We built this city ♪ 429 00:19:45,422 --> 00:19:47,322 ♪ On rock and roll ♪ 430 00:19:47,347 --> 00:19:49,307 ♪ Built this city ♪ 431 00:19:49,965 --> 00:19:51,865 ♪ We built this city ♪ 432 00:19:51,890 --> 00:19:54,408 ♪ On rock and roll ♪ 433 00:19:54,438 --> 00:19:56,508 ♪ Built this city ♪ 434 00:19:56,538 --> 00:19:58,338 ♪ We built this city ♪ 435 00:19:58,378 --> 00:20:01,078 ♪ On rock and roll ♪ 436 00:20:01,108 --> 00:20:03,248 ♪ Built this city. ♪ 437 00:20:04,046 --> 00:20:05,624 You take good care of my Sid. 438 00:20:05,649 --> 00:20:07,260 Oh, I will, I promise. 439 00:20:07,285 --> 00:20:08,755 And thank you for, you know, 440 00:20:09,260 --> 00:20:10,783 divorcing my boyfriend. 441 00:20:12,118 --> 00:20:16,158 Well, look at these dopeheads. 442 00:20:16,871 --> 00:20:19,373 Did y'all go a little cuckoo bananas? 443 00:20:19,398 --> 00:20:22,268 Well, I'm wearing a trash bag, so I think you can guess. 444 00:20:22,298 --> 00:20:24,482 Oh, Margaret, I didn't notice. 445 00:20:24,507 --> 00:20:27,107 I thought for sure you had worn that before. 446 00:20:29,408 --> 00:20:30,878 All right, everybody. 447 00:20:30,908 --> 00:20:32,501 I'm off to the airport. 448 00:20:32,939 --> 00:20:34,628 Oh, Sid, can you believe it? 449 00:20:35,394 --> 00:20:36,863 I'm a single lady now. 450 00:20:37,408 --> 00:20:39,518 Is that right? 451 00:20:39,548 --> 00:20:40,988 Well, if you need a ride, 452 00:20:41,018 --> 00:20:43,988 uh, I got a retirement community rental van 453 00:20:44,018 --> 00:20:45,432 for another hour. 454 00:20:47,794 --> 00:20:49,590 No, I'm good. 455 00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:52,779 What if I told you there's a 40-pound block 456 00:20:52,804 --> 00:20:54,051 of cheddar cheese in the back? 457 00:20:56,428 --> 00:20:58,086 I'll see you in the van. 458 00:21:03,508 --> 00:21:06,308 Sid, I love you. Mwah. 459 00:21:06,338 --> 00:21:07,908 - Goodbye, everybody. - Bye. 460 00:21:09,350 --> 00:21:11,078 Is he okay to drive? 461 00:21:11,118 --> 00:21:13,048 Oh, yeah. Yeah, he's sober now. 462 00:21:13,078 --> 00:21:15,148 Which will only make the rejection harder. 463 00:21:16,508 --> 00:21:17,593 Poor Hank. 464 00:21:18,146 --> 00:21:21,546 Trying to please a woman who's already had the best. 465 00:21:27,698 --> 00:21:29,211 Where is he going? 466 00:21:31,460 --> 00:21:32,460 That's pretty good. 467 00:21:33,351 --> 00:21:38,351 - Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com - 33194

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