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1
00:00:38,247 --> 00:00:45,128
Hey, Sam. Hey, sweetie. Hey, boys.
2
00:00:45,170 --> 00:00:46,380
Oh, Sam, thank god you're here.
3
00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:48,048
Uh, please tell me you didn't kill a stripper.
4
00:00:48,090 --> 00:00:49,550
Worse. smell that.
5
00:00:49,591 --> 00:00:51,134
Okay, I got it, pole sweat.
6
00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:54,429
All right, well, your wives are gonna be busy
for the next hour and a half watching those
7
00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:55,848
Contortionist freaks sing beatles songs.
8
00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:58,225
So we have time to go get
you guys some new clothes.
9
00:00:57,558 --> 00:00:59,643
If we change, the wives
will sniff it out quicker
10
00:00:59,768 --> 00:01:02,396
- than the cheap perfume.
- We are so screwed.
11
00:01:02,437 --> 00:01:03,856
Hey, have I ever let
you down before?
12
00:01:04,857 --> 00:01:06,108
The answer is no.
13
00:01:06,149 --> 00:01:07,442
You guys get your perverted
asses into the limo
14
00:01:07,484 --> 00:01:08,944
Before your wives find out
that you're actually here
15
00:01:08,986 --> 00:01:12,698
To look at naked girls instead
of golf courses. Let's go.
16
00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:20,038
So as head of food and beverage,
17
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,290
I thought I'd give that to you first.
18
00:01:21,331 --> 00:01:25,169
Cocktail is one of my
all-time favorite movies.
19
00:01:25,210 --> 00:01:26,962
Tom cruise, tossing around
all those bottles, mm!
20
00:01:26,962 --> 00:01:28,797
Oh, this flair bartender is even hotter.
21
00:01:28,797 --> 00:01:30,465
Mandalay Bay, the palms, wynn,
22
00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:31,758
They're all trying to steal him.
23
00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,261
Not if we get there first with a better offer.
24
00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:35,387
Just be careful.
25
00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:36,597
The neighborhood's kind of seedy.
26
00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:37,723
You know what,
you need a wingman.
27
00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:38,849
No, no, no, I've been trying to prove
28
00:01:38,891 --> 00:01:40,184
To Cooper that I can do this
29
00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:41,310
Without him pulling any strings.
30
00:01:41,351 --> 00:01:42,853
Yeah, but you still shouldn't go alone.
31
00:01:42,895 --> 00:01:48,984
Mike, you're going with Piper
to steal a bartender. what?
32
00:01:48,984 --> 00:01:48,984
Hello, Danny.
33
00:01:49,026 --> 00:01:53,655
Cooper, come on in. Have a seat.
34
00:01:53,697 --> 00:01:56,783
Revenue reports in.
35
00:01:56,825 --> 00:01:59,745
We're well ahead of last year. yeah!
36
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:01,371
Congratulations.
37
00:02:01,413 --> 00:02:05,042
Thank you, congratulations
to you too. Really, I mean,
38
00:02:05,083 --> 00:02:07,336
You've come in here, and you've
turned the place around.
39
00:02:07,377 --> 00:02:09,546
Hey,anything can happen.
40
00:02:10,714 --> 00:02:12,257
And now that we're in the black,
41
00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:14,259
I'm thinking about an ice bar.
42
00:02:16,929 --> 00:02:18,138
Wait, what do you mean?
43
00:02:18,180 --> 00:02:22,184
The ice bar idea I had. mm.
44
00:02:22,226 --> 00:02:25,395
Uh, you mean like the one that
the mandalay bay already has?
45
00:02:25,437 --> 00:02:26,396
Ours would be better.
46
00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:28,065
So you think that we should just, uh,
47
00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:30,901
Copy things that other
hotels are already doing?
48
00:02:30,943 --> 00:02:32,152
Hey, the mandalay bay's ice bar
49
00:02:32,194 --> 00:02:36,657
Turns people away, they
might come here. yeah.
50
00:02:37,783 --> 00:02:40,827
Bad idea. A bad idea?
In my opinion.
51
00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:42,120
You got a better one?
52
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:45,082
Uh, well, you did love the, uh,
53
00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:47,167
The suitcase party idea.
54
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:49,169
Oh, you mean the one
where the grand prize was
55
00:02:49,211 --> 00:02:50,295
Leaving the Montecito.
56
00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:52,297
I had 12 hours to come up with that.
57
00:02:52,422 --> 00:02:54,716
I'll give you 24 this time. For what?
58
00:02:54,758 --> 00:02:58,887
I'll give you 24 hours to come
up with a better idea. Okay.
59
00:03:00,264 --> 00:03:02,599
I will, I will get you something
better than the ice bar.
60
00:03:02,641 --> 00:03:04,184
Okay, I will get you, uh,
61
00:03:04,226 --> 00:03:06,687
Something way cooler than
the ice bar, trust me.
62
00:03:06,687 --> 00:03:08,772
Chills run up and down my spine.
63
00:03:08,814 --> 00:03:11,108
Yeah, you'll see, you'll see.
64
00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:18,615
Sam, what are we doing in the lobby?
65
00:03:18,657 --> 00:03:19,575
The clock is ticking here.
66
00:03:19,616 --> 00:03:20,826
I mean, we're sitting ducks.
67
00:03:20,868 --> 00:03:22,369
Our wives could walk through
that door any second.
68
00:03:22,411 --> 00:03:25,122
We have a date with the cleaner.
the--the what?
69
00:03:25,122 --> 00:03:26,832
The cleaner, the legend.
70
00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:28,500
The cleaner is just a myth, Sam.
71
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:31,003
He doesn't actually exist.
72
00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:35,007
Behold the myth.
73
00:03:40,846 --> 00:03:43,765
- Skin City.
- How can you tell?
74
00:03:43,807 --> 00:03:46,685
Alcohol-based solvent on the
seats in the champagne room.
75
00:03:46,685 --> 00:03:47,728
We have less than 15 minutes.
76
00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:51,773
Then I suggest we move and
move quickly. gentlemen.
77
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:05,913
It's time to play let's make a deal.
78
00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:08,707
Whoa, whoa, we can't just
walk up to him. why not?
79
00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:10,042
Because you see that
shifty-looking guy
80
00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:11,877
At your 7:00, he's the manager.
81
00:04:11,919 --> 00:04:15,047
He's probably been bouncing
potential poachers all night.
82
00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:17,466
All right, well, we're just gonna
have to play this smooth.
83
00:04:18,008 --> 00:04:20,802
That's so funny.
84
00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:22,221
What are you doing?
85
00:04:22,137 --> 00:04:28,060
Acting follow my lead.
86
00:04:27,935 --> 00:04:28,810
What'll you have?
87
00:04:28,852 --> 00:04:30,312
New bartender at the Montecito.
88
00:04:30,312 --> 00:04:37,277
We'll match any offer
you have plus 5%.
89
00:04:38,487 --> 00:04:41,031
Two mind erasers coming up. wow.
90
00:04:54,086 --> 00:04:56,713
That is impressive. very.
91
00:05:01,218 --> 00:05:03,136
This might take a while.
92
00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:13,856
Hey, so you guys just need to
remember your stories. right?
93
00:05:13,856 --> 00:05:18,610
And you have to tell it exactly the
way I told it to you. right. exactly.
94
00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:21,530
Your wives are smarter than you.
95
00:05:23,031 --> 00:05:25,534
And they can sniff out lies
like pigs sniff out truffles.
96
00:05:25,576 --> 00:05:26,535
It's been an honor.
97
00:05:26,577 --> 00:05:32,040
And a privilege, sir. Full service
98
00:05:32,082 --> 00:05:33,208
From air freshener to alibi.
99
00:05:33,250 --> 00:05:34,751
Fingers crossed.
100
00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:37,838
That won't be necessary.
so what's next?
101
00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:39,590
You goin' to saint tropez to wash
the euro-skank off clooney?
102
00:05:39,590 --> 00:05:43,719
Actually, I'm, uh, I'm hanging
up my steam-vac.
103
00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:45,846
You can't do that.
you're too young to retire.
104
00:05:45,888 --> 00:05:48,891
These old bones don't get around
the way they used to, Sammy.
105
00:05:50,058 --> 00:05:51,143
The venetian offered me
106
00:05:51,185 --> 00:05:54,855
A parking space near the elevator. hmm.
107
00:05:57,441 --> 00:05:59,526
How does free valet sound?
108
00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:03,030
All the valets in Vegas are free.
109
00:06:06,617 --> 00:06:09,077
I like this guy.
110
00:06:09,119 --> 00:06:12,039
I think he's starting to crack. crack? yup.
111
00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:13,624
He just walked the other way.
112
00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:17,002
Okay, so this might take
a couple more rounds.
113
00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:19,046
Think you can handle it?
114
00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:20,589
Mike Cannon can hold his liquor.
115
00:06:20,631 --> 00:06:22,466
You do your best to hold yours.
116
00:06:22,508 --> 00:06:25,177
Got it covered. "how does free valet sound?"
117
00:06:25,219 --> 00:06:29,264
Hey, I'm sorry that valet is not my forte.
118
00:06:29,306 --> 00:06:59,211
Las Vegas S05E15
Guess Who's Coming to Breakfast
119
00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:55,350
The only thing I remember
is you ordering more drinks.
120
00:07:55,392 --> 00:07:57,895
Well, at least you remember something.
121
00:07:57,895 --> 00:08:01,481
I don't remember if we, um... mm. mm.
122
00:08:01,523 --> 00:08:04,234
If we did, you'd remember it.
123
00:08:04,234 --> 00:08:07,279
No, if we did, you would
remember it. whatever.
124
00:08:07,321 --> 00:08:08,405
Let's just keep this between us
until we can make it go away.
125
00:08:08,405 --> 00:08:09,823
Yeah, no problem, believe me.
126
00:08:09,865 --> 00:08:11,617
Cause I do not need
Cooper flashing back
127
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:13,452
to his special op days,
going all rambo on me.
128
00:08:13,535 --> 00:08:15,787
I'm not exactly on his
buddy list right now.
129
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:27,883
how'd you get the ring off?
here. see. there. thanks. yeah.
130
00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:44,441
Hey, whatcha doing in there?
plucking your eyebrows?
131
00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:46,151
I gotta get ready for work, too, you know.
132
00:08:46,235 --> 00:08:47,819
This is not exactly my home court.
133
00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:49,905
I'm sorry if I'm lagging a little.
134
00:08:49,988 --> 00:08:52,282
Is that my last razor?
135
00:08:52,324 --> 00:08:54,159
This thing ain't gonna shine itself.
136
00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:56,578
You can wear pants.
137
00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:01,708
Can you believe he's still
pitching that ice bar idea?
138
00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:04,503
- Like the mandalay bay?
- Yeah.
139
00:09:04,503 --> 00:09:06,380
That's a great idea.
140
00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:08,924
So you're just gonna take his side?
141
00:09:08,924 --> 00:09:10,551
You're obligated as
the mother of my child
142
00:09:10,551 --> 00:09:13,470
- To take my side,come on.
- You don�t have a side.
143
00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:14,304
Yeah, but I will, okay, and when I do,
144
00:09:14,304 --> 00:09:16,223
You're gonna wanna be on it, trust me.
145
00:09:16,265 --> 00:09:18,517
Well, come up with something
better, sweetie, and I will.
146
00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:21,812
Oh, okay, okay, yeah, well get
ready to jump that line there, preggo,
147
00:09:21,812 --> 00:09:23,564
because my idea is gonna be...
148
00:09:23,605 --> 00:09:34,616
better than the ice bar, okay,
cooler, way cooler. way cooler.
149
00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:37,035
Cynthia: Hi, Tracey. Hi, Sam.
150
00:09:37,035 --> 00:09:39,246
It's nice to see you two. You, too.
151
00:09:39,246 --> 00:09:42,791
The boys had an epiphany right
after they left you last night.
152
00:09:42,833 --> 00:09:44,835
An epiphany? interesting.
153
00:09:44,835 --> 00:09:46,211
All the excess of gas
154
00:09:46,211 --> 00:09:48,088
made them rethink a few things.
155
00:09:48,172 --> 00:09:51,300
Well, let's just say we decided
to cover our karmic footprint
156
00:09:51,300 --> 00:09:54,178
By donating half of what we win to charity.
157
00:09:54,219 --> 00:09:55,429
What's gotten into them?
158
00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:57,848
I don't know.
they're practically saints.
159
00:09:57,848 --> 00:10:00,058
We'll see you guys later.
we're off to the spa.
160
00:10:02,853 --> 00:10:07,524
Sam, they bought it hook,
line, and "cleaner."
161
00:10:07,524 --> 00:10:09,359
They even want to stay a couple extra days.
162
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,445
Oh, great. So blackjack or roulette?
163
00:10:11,445 --> 00:10:13,113
We'll definitely hit the tables.
164
00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:17,034
but first I think we would like
to hit the crazy horse too
165
00:10:17,034 --> 00:10:20,913
Absolutely,I'll set up a table
for tonight, private booth.
166
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:25,000
I think we were thinking more
along the lines of a morning kickoff.
167
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,502
Oh, morning kickoff.
168
00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:30,589
Now, you do realize that the
top girls, they work at night.
169
00:10:30,589 --> 00:10:34,510
Daytime is third-string at best.
170
00:10:36,011 --> 00:10:37,471
So I will make sure
171
00:10:37,513 --> 00:10:39,431
that first-string is available for you today.
172
00:10:39,473 --> 00:10:43,560
That is, of course, if we can
get back in to see the cleaner.
173
00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:46,772
Ah, the cleaner, yes, well, I will see
174
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:49,399
ifhe is available for a
personal retainer this weekend,
175
00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:54,613
But you may want to commit
to upping your play to $4.5 millon.
176
00:10:54,696 --> 00:10:56,865
- Consider it done.
- Consider him on retainer.
177
00:10:56,907 --> 00:11:00,994
It'll be like having yoda on call.
How sweet is that?
178
00:11:01,078 --> 00:11:10,128
I heard they have a killer lunch
buffet at the strip club.
179
00:11:10,254 --> 00:11:12,756
So how'd it go with Piper
last night?
180
00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:15,676
- You know?
- Delinda told me.
181
00:11:15,676 --> 00:11:18,303
Piper told Delinda?
It was a misstake, Danny.
182
00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:20,264
You don't have to freak out on me.
183
00:11:20,264 --> 00:11:22,099
Flair bartender, he sucked, big deal.
184
00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:25,394
You're acting like you boned
piper or something.
185
00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:28,188
Why would you say that?
186
00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:29,022
Uh,because when you say something
187
00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:31,275
that could never happen, it's called a joke.
188
00:11:31,316 --> 00:11:37,906
Who says it could never happen?
189
00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:40,158
- You boned her?
- No!
190
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,535
- You boned her.
- Absolutely not.
191
00:11:41,618 --> 00:11:42,786
never can happen.
192
00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:45,038
We went to see the bartender,
then we went our separate ways.
193
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:45,706
That's it, period. Nothing happened.
194
00:11:45,789 --> 00:11:48,208
- Then why are you so paranoid?
- I`m not, senor nosy.
195
00:11:48,292 --> 00:11:51,795
Come on, Mikey, come on, dude.
I�m practically hitched.
196
00:11:51,837 --> 00:11:56,842
I, sad as it is, i sort of live for the
details of your life. You did it?
197
00:11:56,884 --> 00:12:00,470
Hitched? Good one. You had me,
198
00:12:00,512 --> 00:12:03,974
right up until there. You! Till where?
199
00:12:04,016 --> 00:12:06,185
Why you-- this might even be better
200
00:12:06,185 --> 00:12:08,645
Than when you had thos
little midget strippers
201
00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:10,314
follow me around Colin's bachelor party.
202
00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:12,149
Wait, what's even better?
203
00:12:12,191 --> 00:12:15,319
And Piper was genuinely surprised
204
00:12:15,402 --> 00:12:16,778
to see that little wedding ring on her finger.
205
00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:18,780
totally freaking out, like she was really married.
206
00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:20,199
Piper got married?
207
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,409
You are playing it beautifully, but stop.
208
00:12:22,409 --> 00:12:24,828
Come on, man, like you didn't completely orchestrate
209
00:12:24,870 --> 00:12:27,789
a whole fake marriage.
210
00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:32,419
You got married. to Piper.
211
00:12:32,419 --> 00:12:34,922
Mike cannon,mr. responsibility,
212
00:12:34,922 --> 00:12:36,215
makes the most cliched mistake
213
00:12:36,298 --> 00:12:38,425
in all of Vegas folklore. I love it.
214
00:12:38,425 --> 00:12:39,927
Wait--put your hands down.
215
00:12:39,927 --> 00:12:41,762
Lower your voice, what
are you talking about?
216
00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:43,514
What, you just get off the b
from des moines or something?
217
00:12:43,555 --> 00:12:44,431
Yeah, yeah, yeah, just know Mike Cannon
218
00:12:44,473 --> 00:12:46,517
does not make this kind of egregious life error
219
00:12:46,558 --> 00:12:49,102
without being epically impaired by alcohol.
220
00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:51,063
No, Danny Mccoy does not
make this kind of an error,
221
00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:52,523
But apparently Mike Cannon does.
222
00:12:53,899 --> 00:12:55,275
Oh, so you're gonna use the
third-person against me now?
223
00:12:55,317 --> 00:12:57,694
In my time of need? haters.
224
00:12:57,736 --> 00:12:59,404
They love to see you fall.
225
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:01,156
Just make sure you keep
this to yourself, okay?
226
00:13:01,198 --> 00:13:02,449
Yeah, yeah, yeah, please.
227
00:13:02,491 --> 00:13:04,535
On the hush, on the hush.
228
00:13:04,576 --> 00:13:07,538
-So how was it with Piper?
- well, we didn't...
229
00:13:07,579 --> 00:13:09,540
We didn't...
230
00:13:09,540 --> 00:13:12,000
Sex is like pizza, even when
it's bad it's good. Tell me.
231
00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:14,753
Out. Make sure you keep it zipped.
Remember, loose lips.
232
00:13:14,795 --> 00:13:16,421
not a word, Danny.
233
00:13:16,463 --> 00:13:18,674
okay, you can trust me.
234
00:13:22,386 --> 00:13:24,429
- Crazy!
- And naked!
235
00:13:24,471 --> 00:13:27,349
But you have to promise, promise,
236
00:13:27,391 --> 00:13:29,434
not to say anything to anybody.
237
00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:35,357
Oh, no, totally understand. I would
never. okay. oh, my gosh! you go, girl.
238
00:13:35,399 --> 00:13:36,859
Plenty have been trying to tie that down.
239
00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:39,862
No, no, no. Nobody's trying to
tie anything down. why not?
240
00:13:39,903 --> 00:13:42,030
You're a scorpio, right? yeah, so?
241
00:13:42,030 --> 00:13:43,407
Hello, water sign.
242
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:47,035
And venus is in the seventh house
for you right now. which means?
243
00:13:47,077 --> 00:13:48,161
Basically, it means someone special
244
00:13:48,203 --> 00:13:49,329
Is coming into your life.
245
00:13:49,371 --> 00:13:50,789
Ugh! Don't roll your eyes at me.
246
00:13:50,831 --> 00:13:52,749
The planets have spoken.
247
00:13:52,791 --> 00:13:55,752
Yeah, and they told me to quit drinking.
248
00:13:55,794 --> 00:13:57,296
Everything happens for a reason.
249
00:13:59,298 --> 00:14:00,507
I know something you don't know.
250
00:14:02,968 --> 00:14:04,428
I bet it can't top what I just heard.
251
00:14:04,428 --> 00:14:06,054
Mine's super, super secret.
252
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:07,389
Mine's earth-shattering.
253
00:14:07,431 --> 00:14:08,724
I would tell you, but then I
would be betraying the trust
254
00:14:08,765 --> 00:14:10,559
Of one of my very best friends.
255
00:14:10,601 --> 00:14:11,768
And I would tell you,
256
00:14:11,810 --> 00:14:13,520
But I'd be selling out one
of my newest friends.
257
00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:19,193
Piper and Mike got married.
oh, my god, oh, my god!
258
00:14:19,234 --> 00:14:21,028
They're married.
oh, my god. shh. shh.
259
00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,697
Shh. do not tell anybody.
260
00:14:23,697 --> 00:14:25,657
You don't tell anybody about this.
261
00:14:25,699 --> 00:14:27,492
Don't tell anybody. nobody. nobody.
262
00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:51,808
You didn't tell anyone, did you?
263
00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:57,022
Of course not, you? please.
264
00:14:57,064 --> 00:14:58,357
Hey, how's the honeymoon going?
265
00:14:58,398 --> 00:14:59,525
You guys hate each other's guts yet?
266
00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:02,402
I didn't tell anyone.
267
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:03,946
Neither did I. Then how
does she know?
268
00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:06,782
I don't know,what do you think,
I'm clairvoyant or something? ugh.
269
00:15:08,242 --> 00:15:11,245
Oh, you better hope this doesn't
work its way up to cooper.
270
00:15:11,286 --> 00:15:12,329
Why,you afraid he'll
cut your allowance?
271
00:15:12,371 --> 00:15:13,330
Oh, that was cheap.
272
00:15:13,330 --> 00:15:15,999
This is your fault in the
first place. my fault?
273
00:15:16,041 --> 00:15:18,001
Yeah. how is this my fault?
274
00:15:18,043 --> 00:15:20,462
You know, I bet you've been
planning this for months,
275
00:15:20,504 --> 00:15:22,297
Mr. I'm-so-smooth-and-chocolaty.
276
00:15:22,339 --> 00:15:25,259
"this thing ain't gonna
shine itself." what? you?
277
00:15:26,385 --> 00:15:28,887
Where are you? what? you?
278
00:15:28,929 --> 00:15:30,639
Lalalala. Do not put this on me.
279
00:15:30,681 --> 00:15:31,849
I'm the victim here.
280
00:15:31,890 --> 00:15:34,101
Victim? you were in my bed.
281
00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:35,727
Wait, what, you clearly--
282
00:15:35,727 --> 00:15:36,770
Talk to the hand.
283
00:15:36,812 --> 00:15:43,026
Lured me back to your apartment
with an agenda. agenda? ha! yeah.
284
00:15:43,068 --> 00:15:44,903
Oh, god, why don't you
just go back upstairs
285
00:15:44,945 --> 00:15:46,905
To your little office?
286
00:15:46,905 --> 00:15:48,115
Maybe I don't want
to go to my office.
287
00:15:48,156 --> 00:15:49,950
Maybe I want to do
surveillance in the lobby,
288
00:15:49,992 --> 00:15:52,035
See if I can find out who
that leak is around here.
289
00:15:52,077 --> 00:15:53,954
I want a divorce. today.
290
00:15:53,996 --> 00:15:58,834
That makes two of us,
baby. good. great. great.
291
00:15:58,834 --> 00:16:00,919
Yeah,it's fan-friggin'-tastic. mm-hmm.
292
00:16:02,129 --> 00:16:03,130
What are you looking at?
293
00:16:03,130 --> 00:16:08,010
Get back to work. Hey, Mike.
294
00:16:08,051 --> 00:16:09,303
Hey, how you doing?
295
00:16:09,344 --> 00:16:10,596
I would love to stay and chat,
296
00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:11,597
But it is a busy day.
297
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:13,098
Really? Mitch says things are slow.
298
00:16:13,098 --> 00:16:15,350
Mitch said that?
yeah. oh, well.
299
00:16:15,392 --> 00:16:18,645
Slow for us is chaos
for everyone else.
300
00:16:21,398 --> 00:16:23,150
You know, don't you?
301
00:16:23,192 --> 00:16:25,569
I may have heard something.
302
00:16:25,611 --> 00:16:26,862
Before this goes any further,
303
00:16:26,904 --> 00:16:28,113
Just so you know, we
are getting it annulled.
304
00:16:28,155 --> 00:16:30,616
Hey, you're both intelligent,
consenting adults,
305
00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:31,617
Do whatever you think's best.
306
00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:33,452
Well, we think an annulment is best.
307
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:35,495
That's what you want.
I don't want to mettle.
308
00:16:35,537 --> 00:16:40,709
Apparently, it's easier to get
hitched than unhitched. mm.
309
00:16:40,751 --> 00:16:46,548
Judge ferguson is a man
you might want to talk to.
310
00:16:46,590 --> 00:16:47,966
You could give him a call.
311
00:16:47,966 --> 00:16:49,593
If that's what you think is best.
312
00:16:49,635 --> 00:16:54,932
That's, uh, great. Thank you.
313
00:16:54,932 --> 00:16:57,100
I just wanted to remind
you that their wives are
314
00:16:57,142 --> 00:16:58,936
Gonna be done with lunch in 20 minutes,
315
00:16:58,977 --> 00:17:00,062
So in about 20 minutes,
maybe we're gonna have...
316
00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:01,647
They brought extras.
317
00:17:01,688 --> 00:17:02,606
Yeah, well, you know,
318
00:17:02,648 --> 00:17:04,483
News travels fast in the hot zone,
319
00:17:04,525 --> 00:17:06,318
And since they've all decided
to gamble here at the Montecito,
320
00:17:06,360 --> 00:17:07,903
I figured it would be okay
to extend the courtesy,yes.
321
00:17:07,945 --> 00:17:10,155
I told you I was retiring.
322
00:17:10,197 --> 00:17:11,865
Oh, you're upset.
323
00:17:11,907 --> 00:17:14,535
Oh, I could help you.
don't touch. Anything.
324
00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:16,495
This is an art, Sam.
325
00:17:16,495 --> 00:17:17,704
A housewife can tell you
326
00:17:17,704 --> 00:17:19,665
That club soda will get
a red wine stain out.
327
00:17:19,706 --> 00:17:22,042
But she doesn't know if
the fabric is preshrunk,
328
00:17:22,084 --> 00:17:25,087
You can boil it in milk,
remove the heat,
329
00:17:25,128 --> 00:17:26,755
And the stain will disappear.
330
00:17:26,797 --> 00:17:28,340
So you want me to get
you help from the kitchen?
331
00:17:28,382 --> 00:17:30,342
The only one with the
wealth of knowledge
332
00:17:30,384 --> 00:17:33,011
And the ability is my grandson.
333
00:17:33,011 --> 00:17:35,472
Oh. Herbert will never do it.
334
00:17:35,514 --> 00:17:37,558
He's probably still upset his
mother named him...
335
00:17:38,809 --> 00:17:40,310
I need the kid, Sam, or I walk.
336
00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:41,478
I'm gonna get him for you.
337
00:17:43,021 --> 00:17:45,232
Kind of ironic that you're a
champion of women's rights,
338
00:17:45,274 --> 00:17:47,609
And your grandfather
cleans stripper skank
339
00:17:47,609 --> 00:17:49,736
Off of desperate husbands.
340
00:17:49,778 --> 00:17:53,115
It's not irony, miss Marquez,
if you do it on purpose.
341
00:17:53,156 --> 00:17:56,618
This is my penance for five generations.
342
00:17:56,660 --> 00:17:58,412
See,I hope to change.
343
00:17:58,453 --> 00:18:02,499
Oh, yeah, but I mean you don't
really want to change, you know?
344
00:18:02,541 --> 00:18:04,209
Breaking the chain can be so exhausting.
345
00:18:04,251 --> 00:18:05,335
Hey, you know what?
346
00:18:05,377 --> 00:18:07,087
Once, I wanted to own this casino,
347
00:18:07,129 --> 00:18:10,924
But I didn't have $241
million lying around,
348
00:18:10,966 --> 00:18:13,218
So I just decided to stick with
what I'm good at. And I'm happy.
349
00:18:13,260 --> 00:18:15,387
I'm as happy as a pig in slop.
350
00:18:15,387 --> 00:18:18,932
Well, it's not exactly the nobel peace prize.
351
00:18:21,310 --> 00:18:22,477
So you just, uh, sit around here at a desk
352
00:18:22,519 --> 00:18:23,478
For eight hours every day?
353
00:18:23,478 --> 00:18:26,982
That sounds awesome,
herb. Herbert. Herbert.
354
00:18:27,024 --> 00:18:30,277
Do you have any idea how
much pressure he put on me?
355
00:18:30,319 --> 00:18:32,112
Countless pop quizzes
356
00:18:32,154 --> 00:18:34,114
On whether listerine
spritz or white vinegar
357
00:18:34,114 --> 00:18:36,325
Helps neutralize jean
nate more effectively.
358
00:18:36,366 --> 00:18:39,453
Hours in the cosmetics
sections of macy's,
359
00:18:39,494 --> 00:18:41,705
Sniff testing "charlie"
and "white shoulders."
360
00:18:41,747 --> 00:18:43,624
That sounds excruciating.
361
00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:45,000
So excuse me if I'd
like to do something
362
00:18:45,042 --> 00:18:47,336
A little more uplifting than
cover for strip-aholics.
363
00:18:47,377 --> 00:18:48,504
No, I totally get that.
364
00:18:48,545 --> 00:18:51,507
Hey, you know what?
365
00:18:51,548 --> 00:18:53,217
We'll do it without you.
366
00:18:53,217 --> 00:18:55,052
You're going to clean?
367
00:18:56,220 --> 00:18:59,431
Yeah, it's just, uh, you pour hot milk
368
00:18:59,473 --> 00:19:01,975
Over, uh, club soda stains
369
00:19:02,017 --> 00:19:04,436
And the rest is pretty much
just nail polish remover, right?
370
00:19:04,478 --> 00:19:06,730
What? he told you that?
371
00:19:06,772 --> 00:19:10,609
Yeah,he told me that he'd
teach me everything he knows.
372
00:19:10,609 --> 00:19:12,236
He's pretty great,huh?
373
00:19:12,277 --> 00:19:14,488
Anyway, I totally understand.
374
00:19:14,530 --> 00:19:17,950
You want out. You're out.
375
00:19:19,785 --> 00:19:24,206
Would you mind putting a
little steam under this for me?
376
00:19:24,248 --> 00:19:25,874
We should really soak it first.
377
00:19:25,916 --> 00:19:29,253
That's 50% microfiber.
the steam might shrink it.
378
00:19:32,381 --> 00:19:35,592
And that's domestic beer, so...
379
00:19:35,634 --> 00:19:38,846
I know what you're trying
to do, and it's not gonna work.
380
00:19:40,097 --> 00:19:41,682
Whoa, whoa, Herbert,
how you gonna just leave
381
00:19:41,723 --> 00:19:43,517
When your grandpa has
all this work left to do?
382
00:19:43,559 --> 00:19:45,686
Easy, he's a legend.
383
00:19:48,981 --> 00:19:51,149
You should be ashamed of yourselves.
384
00:19:55,112 --> 00:19:59,408
So are we still in fight
mode, mrs. Cannon?
385
00:19:59,324 --> 00:20:02,536
I don�t have the energy to
bite your head off, mr. Cannon.
386
00:20:02,619 --> 00:20:05,747
I have been fending off jackals all day.
387
00:20:05,789 --> 00:20:08,625
Something borrowed,
something blue. it's cute.
388
00:20:08,667 --> 00:20:10,252
Yeah, from the girls in the spa.
389
00:20:10,294 --> 00:20:11,753
They wouldn't let me go until I put it on.
390
00:20:11,795 --> 00:20:15,966
Yeah, well, I do have some good news. kinda.
391
00:20:16,008 --> 00:20:20,637
Cooper hooked us up with a judge that can
give us an annulment. Cooper knows? oh, god!
392
00:20:20,679 --> 00:20:22,598
Oh, god! it was bound to happen.
393
00:20:22,639 --> 00:20:24,308
It could have been much
worse. oh, yeah, like how?
394
00:20:24,349 --> 00:20:25,934
He could have killed me.
395
00:20:25,976 --> 00:20:28,395
You know what, after this
whole thing with my dad,
396
00:20:28,437 --> 00:20:30,522
I just don't know if I want
cooper helping me out anymore.
397
00:20:30,564 --> 00:20:33,817
Well,you want to wait
and find our own judge,
398
00:20:33,817 --> 00:20:35,152
I'll totally understand.
399
00:20:35,194 --> 00:20:37,070
But it could take up to six weeks.
400
00:20:37,112 --> 00:20:40,115
No offense, but I think we have
to get this over with. None taken.
401
00:20:40,157 --> 00:20:42,075
You gonna finish that burger?
402
00:20:42,117 --> 00:20:45,078
Because since we're married,
technically, I get half.
403
00:20:45,120 --> 00:20:47,539
No, since we're married, technically,
404
00:20:47,581 --> 00:20:49,958
You should order your
own and pay for mine.
405
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:57,799
Oh, that's how it works,
huh? uh-huh. ohh. hey.
406
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:00,719
Uh, my time's not up yet.
407
00:21:00,761 --> 00:21:03,555
I still got like three hours. yeah,I know.
408
00:21:03,597 --> 00:21:05,015
It just occurred to me
that after you pitch,
409
00:21:05,057 --> 00:21:06,266
We might have two great ideas.
410
00:21:06,308 --> 00:21:09,186
And we probably can't afford 'em both.
411
00:21:09,186 --> 00:21:10,646
Yeah, yeah, you're absolutely right about that
412
00:21:10,687 --> 00:21:12,814
Because my idea is big. huge.
413
00:21:13,357 --> 00:21:16,485
I'm shivering in my boots. Listen, we have
414
00:21:16,527 --> 00:21:18,028
A lot of department heads affected by this,
415
00:21:18,070 --> 00:21:19,238
So let's take a vote.
416
00:21:19,279 --> 00:21:22,157
No, no, who do you think
they're gonna vote for?
417
00:21:22,199 --> 00:21:23,534
You own the place.
418
00:21:23,659 --> 00:21:25,369
Besides,they're already intimidated enough
419
00:21:25,410 --> 00:21:26,745
Just by you wearing that suit.
420
00:21:26,787 --> 00:21:28,413
You live with one of 'em.
421
00:21:28,455 --> 00:21:31,583
Okay, okay, we will eliminate
422
00:21:31,583 --> 00:21:51,395
All outside influences by holding
a secret ballot. done. okay.
423
00:21:51,436 --> 00:21:54,231
Barrel rides over the waterfall.
424
00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:58,068
Not that it makes or breaks you,
425
00:21:58,110 --> 00:22:00,070
But the cannons have never had one divorce.
426
00:22:00,112 --> 00:22:02,322
Well, technically, this isn't a divorce.
427
00:22:02,364 --> 00:22:04,533
So your streak is still intact.
428
00:22:04,575 --> 00:22:06,076
My parents would be so proud.
429
00:22:06,118 --> 00:22:07,703
Maybe we should have them
over for dinner sometime.
430
00:22:07,744 --> 00:22:09,705
Mm, speaking of which,
431
00:22:09,746 --> 00:22:12,875
Nice dvd collection at your pad. Who gave you
432
00:22:12,916 --> 00:22:14,835
Special edition?
433
00:22:14,877 --> 00:22:16,837
Now, why does somebody
have to give that to me?
434
00:22:16,879 --> 00:22:18,255
Girls can be into sci-fi.
435
00:22:18,255 --> 00:22:20,883
Yeah, geek girls.
436
00:22:20,883 --> 00:22:22,885
Oh, so now you're calling me a geek girl, huh?
437
00:22:22,885 --> 00:22:24,178
Marriage is supposed to be about honesty,
438
00:22:24,219 --> 00:22:27,639
So I won't say you're a sci-fi geek girl, per se.
439
00:22:27,681 --> 00:22:30,976
no more of a futuristic movie nerd.
440
00:22:31,018 --> 00:22:33,395
Unless you have some action
figures tucked away up there,
441
00:22:33,437 --> 00:22:35,480
Then that puts you in a
whole different category.
442
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:38,483
I think that's the nerd
calling the kettle square.
443
00:22:38,525 --> 00:22:39,526
Nerdiness and higher education
444
00:22:40,736 --> 00:22:42,738
Do not necessarily have to
exist on the same plane.
445
00:22:42,779 --> 00:22:45,032
Hold that thought. hello.
446
00:22:45,073 --> 00:22:46,950
Hello, mrs. Cannon?
447
00:22:46,950 --> 00:22:49,286
Uh, yes, I guess.
448
00:22:49,328 --> 00:22:53,582
Your wedding video is
ready. Wedding video?
449
00:22:55,959 --> 00:22:57,794
When I told you,
450
00:22:57,836 --> 00:23:00,672
That I wasn't into older guys,
451
00:23:00,714 --> 00:23:05,219
That was because I wanted you
to see me as a challenge. oh, god.
452
00:23:09,890 --> 00:23:13,685
Oh,I got something I want to confess.
453
00:23:13,685 --> 00:23:17,064
I watch you on the monitors.
454
00:23:18,232 --> 00:23:21,401
Like, all the time. Oh,my god.
455
00:23:21,443 --> 00:23:23,570
And I watch everyone really
because that's my job.
456
00:23:23,612 --> 00:23:25,155
That's what I do.
457
00:23:25,197 --> 00:23:26,949
And I'm good at it,baby.
I'm good at my job.
458
00:23:26,990 --> 00:23:30,953
But you, I like watching you most.
459
00:23:30,994 --> 00:23:31,995
Does that creep you out?
460
00:23:32,037 --> 00:23:33,956
Is that creepy? I love this part.
461
00:23:33,997 --> 00:23:36,250
It's creepy, but I love it.
462
00:23:37,751 --> 00:23:41,255
See, we belong together.
463
00:23:41,255 --> 00:23:43,966
Yes, we do. We deserve each other.
464
00:23:44,007 --> 00:23:45,968
Oh-ho, god, no, no.
465
00:23:46,009 --> 00:23:47,427
Tell me that's not the
most adorable couple
466
00:23:47,469 --> 00:23:51,682
You've ever seen. I said that?
467
00:23:51,682 --> 00:23:54,726
Can I get a soul clap? aah!
468
00:23:54,768 --> 00:23:57,896
Soul clap? You have to make
sure you burn all of this footage.
469
00:23:57,938 --> 00:23:59,231
Are you kidding?
470
00:23:59,273 --> 00:24:00,315
I'm putting this on the
front page of my website.
471
00:24:18,041 --> 00:24:19,376
How are the ideas flowing?
472
00:24:19,418 --> 00:24:22,421
like champagne in a
championship locker room.
473
00:24:22,462 --> 00:24:23,422
You got nothing, huh?
474
00:24:23,463 --> 00:24:25,382
Not a thing. hey,Sam.
Not a thing. hey,Sam.
475
00:24:25,382 --> 00:24:27,718
Hey, Mike and Piper, right? blah!
476
00:24:31,597 --> 00:24:32,681
How does she know?
477
00:24:32,681 --> 00:24:33,849
Did you tell her?
478
00:24:33,849 --> 00:24:34,892
I didn't tell anybody. Did you?
479
00:24:34,933 --> 00:24:36,560
No, I just told you.
480
00:24:36,602 --> 00:24:39,188
We've gotta do something about this.
481
00:24:39,188 --> 00:24:41,523
Well, you can't force people not to gosip,
482
00:24:41,565 --> 00:24:42,441
That's the thing.
483
00:24:42,482 --> 00:24:46,153
No, but we could throw a party.
484
00:24:46,153 --> 00:24:48,030
An annulment party.
485
00:24:48,071 --> 00:24:49,865
An annulment, what do you mean?
486
00:24:49,907 --> 00:24:51,158
We might as well hang a bell on it, Danny.
487 00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:53,827
487
00:24:53,869 --> 00:24:55,954
That's a good idea.
488
00:24:55,954 --> 00:25:03,253
You know I knocked you
up for a reason. bye. nice job.
489
00:25:03,253 --> 00:25:04,755
I suppose judge Ferguson's number
490
00:25:04,796 --> 00:25:06,298
Just happened to fall into Mike's pocket?
491
00:25:06,340 --> 00:25:07,883
Hey, I didn't give him a phone number.
492
00:25:07,883 --> 00:25:09,718
I don't need your help anymore, Cooper.
493
00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:10,969
I wasn't helping you.
494
00:25:11,011 --> 00:25:12,221
Mike wanted help.
495
00:25:12,262 --> 00:25:18,143
Well, well, if that's the case, then, thank you.
496
00:25:18,185 --> 00:25:20,729
From Mike, he thanks you.
497
00:25:20,771 --> 00:25:23,982
Tell him I said,"you're welcome." he's welcome.
498
00:25:25,651 --> 00:25:28,237
I never talk about my clients.
499
00:25:28,278 --> 00:25:30,489
Confidentiality is priceless.
500
00:25:30,531 --> 00:25:32,157
Sure, amen to that.
501
00:25:32,199 --> 00:25:34,660
You know, they build shrines to
men like you in our business.
502
00:25:34,701 --> 00:25:36,828
I don't want a shrine.
503
00:25:36,870 --> 00:25:40,040
I want a legacy.
504
00:25:40,082 --> 00:25:41,500
Herbert could be the greatest cleaner
505
00:25:41,542 --> 00:25:42,626
That ever lived.
506
00:25:42,668 --> 00:25:44,878
Have you ever told him that? He knows it.
507
00:25:44,878 --> 00:25:47,047
He just doesn't want to accept it.
508
00:25:52,636 --> 00:25:54,304
This isn't the matrix, Sam.
509
00:25:54,346 --> 00:25:55,889
The world's not gonna end if I don't get
510
00:25:55,889 --> 00:25:59,059
All the ranch dressing off some jerk's khakis.
511
00:25:59,059 --> 00:26:00,894
Sure, but what if you're the
last person in the world
512
00:26:00,936 --> 00:26:02,855
Who's actually qualified to do this?
513
00:26:02,896 --> 00:26:05,983
And you turn your back
on it. then it dies.
514
00:26:05,983 --> 00:26:07,401
And rightfully so.
515
00:26:07,442 --> 00:26:08,735
You don't even deserve to take
the reins from your grandfather.
516
00:26:08,777 --> 00:26:11,280
Good, I don't want 'em. listen to me.
517
00:26:11,321 --> 00:26:12,906
I am not the best casino host in Las Vegas.
518
00:26:12,948 --> 00:26:16,243
I am actually the best casino
host in the world. and humble too.
519
00:26:16,285 --> 00:26:18,620
And your grandfather is
the best cleaner in the world.
520
00:26:18,662 --> 00:26:21,290
But he actually thinks that you
could be even better than he is.
521
00:26:21,331 --> 00:26:22,791
I mean, does that not
mean anything to you?
522
00:26:22,833 --> 00:26:24,501
To have someone believe in you like that?
523
00:26:24,543 --> 00:26:26,587
I can be the best at something else.
524
00:26:26,587 --> 00:26:28,422
No, I have news for you. you can't.
525
00:26:28,463 --> 00:26:29,423
This is in your dna.
526
00:26:29,464 --> 00:26:30,632
I don't want to die
527
00:26:30,674 --> 00:26:31,967
With prince matchibelli
under my fingernails.
528
00:26:32,009 --> 00:26:32,968
Well your grandfather does.
529
00:26:33,010 --> 00:26:34,720
This is what he loves.
530
00:26:34,720 --> 00:26:37,181
And he feels like he can't do it
anymore without--you know what,
531
00:26:37,181 --> 00:26:40,434
I don't even know why I'm doing this.
532
00:26:40,475 --> 00:26:41,768
Be ordinary. Be average.
533
00:26:41,810 --> 00:26:43,645
Stuff envelopes for a living.
What do I care?
534
00:26:43,687 --> 00:27:03,999
You won't sleep at night though.
I guarantee it. Hello. mrs. Cannon?
535
00:27:04,041 --> 00:27:06,210
Hey, how's it been? what's up?
536
00:27:06,251 --> 00:27:08,212
Just checking in on my wife
537
00:27:08,253 --> 00:27:09,755
On the last day of our marriage.
538
00:27:09,796 --> 00:27:12,049
Making sure you didn't
trip over the threshold
539
00:27:12,090 --> 00:27:13,884
Since I wasn't there to carry you over.
540
00:27:15,219 --> 00:27:17,054
Ah, true gentleman.
541
00:27:17,095 --> 00:27:19,640
Well, I'm sure you did
carry me over last night.
542
00:27:19,681 --> 00:27:22,392
Um, at least, that would explain
the bump on my head.
543
00:27:22,434 --> 00:27:23,435
You calling me a klutz?
544
00:27:23,477 --> 00:27:25,646
Emotionally, yeah, probably.
545
00:27:30,025 --> 00:27:35,364
But, if I were to have a drunken
sham of a marriage,
546
00:27:35,405 --> 00:27:47,334
I couldn't think of anybody more perfect
to have one with. Me too. I mean, me either.
547
00:27:49,211 --> 00:27:50,879
What time do you want
me to pick you up
548
00:27:50,879 --> 00:27:52,297
For the annulment?
549
00:27:52,339 --> 00:27:55,300
Um, 3:30 is good.
550
00:27:55,342 --> 00:27:56,844
Sounds kinda like a date.
551
00:27:56,885 --> 00:27:58,554
Well, we should probably
552
00:27:58,554 --> 00:28:02,224
Have at least one. I guess
553
00:28:02,266 --> 00:28:04,184
It's too late to get romantic though.
554
00:28:04,184 --> 00:28:07,980
Yeah, there's...
555
00:28:08,230 --> 00:28:12,860
No turning back now.
556
00:28:12,901 --> 00:28:14,611
In that case, I'll let you enjoy
557
00:28:14,653 --> 00:28:17,739
Your last few hours of marriage in peace.
558
00:28:19,867 --> 00:28:21,577
Good night, mrs. Cannon.
559
00:28:21,869 --> 00:28:27,124
Good night, mr. Cannon.
560
00:29:01,450 --> 00:29:03,452
I've been thinking about
this whole marriage thing.
561
00:29:03,493 --> 00:29:05,370
Oh, don't think too hard.
562
00:29:05,412 --> 00:29:08,290
It turns into a pumpkin
at 4:00. I don't know.
563
00:29:08,332 --> 00:29:10,083
I think maybe you should reconsider.
564
00:29:10,125 --> 00:29:11,793
You mean stay married?
565
00:29:11,835 --> 00:29:13,754
Delinda, when your groomsmen are vodka,
566
00:29:13,795 --> 00:29:15,380
Peppermint schnapps, and kahlua,
567
00:29:15,422 --> 00:29:17,132
An annulment is the right thing to do.
568
00:29:17,174 --> 00:29:18,133
I'll have my usual.
569
00:29:18,175 --> 00:29:19,384
I'll take a decaf.
570
00:29:19,426 --> 00:29:20,385
You know, in some cultures
571
00:29:20,385 --> 00:29:22,554
Arranged marriages are still the norm.
572
00:29:22,596 --> 00:29:25,807
Yes, but in america, we are
free to erase our mistakes.
573
00:29:25,807 --> 00:29:27,935
Which you've had plenty
of in the love department.
574
00:29:28,143 --> 00:29:31,980
Some would say disastrous
on a cosmic scale.
575
00:29:32,022 --> 00:29:33,607
Thanks for the vote of confidence.
576
00:29:33,607 --> 00:29:36,693
No, no, I mean cosmic as in you have no control.
577
00:29:36,735 --> 00:29:38,904
As much as you wanted them to happen,
578
00:29:38,904 --> 00:29:40,322
They fell apart.
579
00:29:40,364 --> 00:29:43,825
But this,this happened without
you even trying, Mike.
580
00:29:43,867 --> 00:29:45,285
As if it were meant to be.
581
00:29:45,327 --> 00:29:48,664
Sometimes you just slip
and fall on a banana peel.
582
00:29:48,705 --> 00:29:50,499
It has nothing to do with a past life.
583
00:29:50,541 --> 00:29:51,708
I don't know why you're
trying to fight this.
584
00:29:51,750 --> 00:29:54,962
You're a huxtable waiting to happen. ha!
585
00:29:55,003 --> 00:29:57,756
2.5 kids in a neighborhood
with good public schools is...
586
00:29:57,798 --> 00:29:59,508
It's practically in your blood.
587
00:29:59,508 --> 00:30:05,889
I'm gonna go hide in my office.
oh, oh. What is that? What? Nothing.
588
00:30:05,931 --> 00:30:07,099
You have your wedding
ring underneath there.
589
00:30:07,140 --> 00:30:08,433
Don't you have worto do?
590
00:30:08,475 --> 00:30:16,483
I don't know. Do I need to cancel
the annulment party? Think about it.
591
00:30:17,484 --> 00:30:19,945
No, no, no, no, Sam,
592
00:30:19,987 --> 00:30:22,030
This is gum. You have
to freeze it first
593
00:30:22,072 --> 00:30:23,323
Before you chip it off.
594
00:30:23,365 --> 00:30:25,075
I thought you said it was
different with silk blends.
595
00:30:25,117 --> 00:30:28,453
No, no, I said rayon and polyester.
596
00:30:28,495 --> 00:30:36,086
Uh,you're gonna have to pass me the
coconut oil. Okay. Coconut oil. Oh, no, no.
597
00:30:36,128 --> 00:30:38,130
No, no, that's denatured alcohol.
598
00:30:38,172 --> 00:30:42,092
You can cause an explosion. Coconut oil.
599
00:30:42,134 --> 00:30:43,886
Now I'm just reminding you
that they're having lunch
600
00:30:43,927 --> 00:30:46,013
With their wives in 35 minutes,
I'm just saying.
601
00:30:46,013 --> 00:30:47,681
I'm never gonna make it. Okay.
602
00:30:47,723 --> 00:30:50,392
I'm never gonna make it. Oh crap.
603
00:30:51,810 --> 00:30:53,520
Hopefully this is the
second steam cleaner.
604
00:30:54,980 --> 00:30:56,773
Let's get to work.
605
00:31:29,598 --> 00:31:30,891
Totally clueless.
606
00:31:30,933 --> 00:31:33,685
Dude, I'm not clueless.
we're getting it annulled.
607
00:31:33,727 --> 00:31:40,734
Piper and I realize this is no way to
start a relationship. Okay?
608
00:31:40,776 --> 00:31:44,071
You weren't talking to me, were you?
609
00:31:44,112 --> 00:31:45,364
But you know what, Mikey,
610
00:31:45,405 --> 00:31:46,615
Your problems are much
bigger than mine, right now.
611
00:31:46,657 --> 00:31:48,367
Have a seat. Let's talk about this.
612
00:31:48,408 --> 00:31:49,660
There's nothing to talk about.
613
00:31:49,701 --> 00:31:51,245
We're getting it annulled. Period.
614
00:31:51,286 --> 00:31:52,996
End of story. And that is it.
615
00:31:52,996 --> 00:31:54,831
So why the, uh, why the sad face?
616
00:31:54,831 --> 00:31:56,166
Have you been crying?
617
00:31:56,208 --> 00:31:57,709
No,I haven't been crying.
618
00:31:57,751 --> 00:32:00,337
I'm fine. I don't need this.
619
00:32:00,337 --> 00:32:03,382
Crying, come on.
620
00:32:03,423 --> 00:32:06,802
It's just that...
621
00:32:06,844 --> 00:32:08,679
I'm getting older.
622
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:09,805
Piper's a great girl,
623
00:32:09,847 --> 00:32:11,598
Which is probably why I
married her to begin with.
624
00:32:11,598 --> 00:32:14,309
Alcohol was why you married her.
625
00:32:14,351 --> 00:32:16,311
All I'm saying is under
different circumstances,
626
00:32:16,353 --> 00:32:18,522
What if we are right for each other?
627
00:32:18,564 --> 00:32:20,607
What if the girl I married for a day
628
00:32:20,649 --> 00:32:23,026
Turns out to be the
best thing I ever met?
629
00:32:23,026 --> 00:32:24,236
No offense to piper,
630
00:32:24,278 --> 00:32:26,113
But you got to look around, buddy.
631
00:32:26,154 --> 00:32:28,031
You're so close that you're not seeing
632
00:32:28,073 --> 00:32:31,243
The panoramic view before you.
633
00:32:31,285 --> 00:32:32,828
I mean, look around.
634
00:32:32,870 --> 00:32:37,165
Yeah,you're right. I know you're
right. I am right. I am so right.
635
00:32:37,207 --> 00:32:38,750
Yeah,I just said you were right.
636
00:32:38,792 --> 00:32:40,711
Thank you. good luck.
637
00:32:40,752 --> 00:32:43,338
You don't have to gloat.
it's really unattractive.
638
00:32:43,380 --> 00:32:45,924
You heard about Mike still
wearing your ring, right? Yeah,yeah.
639
00:32:45,966 --> 00:32:48,969
Doesn't mean anything, does it?
640
00:32:49,011 --> 00:32:50,262
Of course it means something.
641
00:32:50,304 --> 00:32:51,597
It's the universe telling you what to do.
642
00:32:51,638 --> 00:32:53,599
You just have to listen.
643
00:32:53,599 --> 00:32:56,727
You don't watch Dr. Phil? No, no I don't.
644
00:32:56,768 --> 00:32:58,103
And don't confuse me with this stuff.
645
00:32:58,103 --> 00:32:59,730
You know, this is just-- it's just all too much.
646
00:32:59,771 --> 00:33:01,815
And I'm gonna be late.
647
00:33:01,857 --> 00:33:02,900
So I'll see you at the meeting.
648
00:33:02,941 --> 00:33:05,402
And at the party. uh!
649
00:33:09,198 --> 00:33:10,490
They totally like each other.
650
00:33:10,532 --> 00:33:12,367
Mike and Piper, come on.
651
00:33:12,409 --> 00:33:13,911
You know what, I betcha
they don't go through
652
00:33:13,952 --> 00:33:14,912
With the annulment.
653
00:33:14,953 --> 00:33:16,330
It was a drunken mistake.
654
00:33:16,371 --> 00:33:21,126
It's gonna be over quicker than
it happened. Oh, really? How much?
655
00:33:25,422 --> 00:33:27,508
Are you sure I need to see all this?
656
00:33:27,508 --> 00:33:30,135
We just wanted to demonstrate
the fact that we were both
657
00:33:30,177 --> 00:33:32,888
Highly intoxicated at the time of the nuptials.
658
00:33:32,930 --> 00:33:35,432
I figured that out about
15 seconds into this thing.
659
00:33:35,432 --> 00:33:39,353
Oh, yeah, and did I mention
660
00:33:39,394 --> 00:33:41,855
We didn't consummate?
661
00:33:41,897 --> 00:33:43,774
Normally, things don't happen this fast.
662
00:33:43,815 --> 00:33:45,567
We are well aware.
663
00:33:45,609 --> 00:33:46,777
You should get cooper one
of those expensive cigars
664
00:33:46,818 --> 00:33:48,195
He likes to smoke.
665
00:33:48,237 --> 00:33:51,198
Believe me,your honor,as soon
as you sign those orders,
666
00:33:51,198 --> 00:33:53,492
We are going to get him a whole box.
667
00:33:53,534 --> 00:33:56,703
Reach into that briefcase there.
668
00:33:56,703 --> 00:33:59,122
You know, it's funny.
669
00:33:59,164 --> 00:34:02,501
I see so many people who try
670
00:34:02,501 --> 00:34:06,004
To erase something they
see as a giant mistake.
671
00:34:07,297 --> 00:34:10,342
But it's just a bump in the road.
672
00:34:10,384 --> 00:34:12,135
We all make mistakes.
673
00:34:12,135 --> 00:34:13,846
We're just human.
674
00:34:13,887 --> 00:34:15,472
More human than human.
675
00:34:15,514 --> 00:34:17,015
That's from blade runner.
676
00:34:17,057 --> 00:34:18,976
Just sign by the little yellow thingies.
677
00:34:18,976 --> 00:34:26,942
And you'll officially be single
again. Ready for this? Yeah.
678
00:34:26,984 --> 00:34:31,864
Just feels like a bigger moment than
I thought it would be. Yeah, me too.
679
00:34:40,581 --> 00:34:43,500
These are your ticket stubs.
680
00:34:43,500 --> 00:34:45,335
You caught the blue man group matinee
681
00:34:45,377 --> 00:34:46,170
Because it was too hot to golf.
682
00:34:46,587 --> 00:34:48,630
I strategically left a little paint on all of you
683
00:34:48,672 --> 00:34:50,424
So go ahead and tell her you sat up front.
684
00:34:50,424 --> 00:34:52,509
And please don't show
your wives the ticket stubs.
685
00:34:52,509 --> 00:34:53,552
That's too obvious.
686
00:34:53,594 --> 00:34:56,221
Leave them with your wallet
and keys on the dresser.
687
00:34:56,263 --> 00:34:59,391
Thanks for everything. No problem.
688
00:35:00,559 --> 00:35:04,646
So all's well that ends
well, right? Herbert,
689
00:35:04,688 --> 00:35:07,649
Yolooked to me like you
were having a little bit of fun.
690
00:35:07,691 --> 00:35:09,234
I gotta admit it felt natural.
691
00:35:09,234 --> 00:35:12,613
Kind of satisfying. Interesting.
692
00:35:12,654 --> 00:35:17,367
I'm proud of you,and if
you need to walk away,
693
00:35:17,492 --> 00:35:21,747
- You have my blessing.
- What?
694
00:35:20,621 --> 00:35:22,998
Come on, Sam.
It�s a dying art.
695
00:35:22,998 --> 00:35:24,666
What if I were to tell you
696
00:35:24,666 --> 00:35:27,044
That I could expand your client base,
697
00:35:27,085 --> 00:35:31,340
That I could get you a
permanent suite? Not interested.
698
00:35:36,094 --> 00:35:37,596
What is the biggest moneymaker,
699
00:35:37,638 --> 00:35:45,229
Outside of gambling, at the
Montecito? The opus, opus.
700
00:35:45,646 --> 00:35:47,564
Okay,here's another question.
701
00:35:47,606 --> 00:35:50,734
How could we make opus
even better? Dee?
702
00:35:50,859 --> 00:35:55,405
by giving it an ice bar? hey, Sam,
703
00:35:55,405 --> 00:35:57,533
Welcome. It's a cute-fest.
704
00:35:57,574 --> 00:35:58,825
Uh,we're talking about opus.
705
00:35:59,368 --> 00:36:02,412
- And what does opus have?
- Everything.
706
00:36:02,454 --> 00:36:03,872
almost everything.
707
00:36:03,914 --> 00:36:06,124
It's got great food,it's got great drinks,
drinks, it�s got a great bar
708
00:36:06,166 --> 00:36:08,752
it's got everything
except... a view.
709
00:36:08,418 --> 00:36:10,170
A panoramic view.
710
00:36:10,212 --> 00:36:12,756
Ghost bar's nice. They got
a great view over there.
711
00:36:12,798 --> 00:36:15,801
I get my drinks on at the ghost bar.
712
00:36:15,843 --> 00:36:19,304
Okay, yeah, well, anyway, what if
we put a club up on the roof?
713
00:36:19,304 --> 00:36:20,597
all glass, all around,
714
00:36:20,681 --> 00:36:29,690
360-degree view of the whole
city. behold. "the rooftop."
715
00:36:29,690 --> 00:36:31,358
You know, just sippin', chillin',
716
00:36:31,358 --> 00:36:32,401
Takin' in that view.
717
00:36:32,442 --> 00:36:33,902
Extend the elevator up one floor,
718
00:36:33,944 --> 00:36:35,612
creating exclusive access.
719
00:36:35,654 --> 00:36:36,947
and the next thing you
now, you guys are all holding
720
00:36:36,947 --> 00:36:41,201
The nightlife right here at
the Montecito. With a view. huh?
721
00:36:41,243 --> 00:36:44,079
Wasn't one of your previous
owners blown off the roof?
722
00:36:45,372 --> 00:36:47,207
so instead of the roller coaster,
723
00:36:47,291 --> 00:36:49,209
we have a slide and we
call it "the death trip."
724
00:36:49,251 --> 00:36:50,419
You know, it starts at the rooftop
725
00:36:50,711 --> 00:36:52,337
and goes all the way down
to that manolo blahnik store.
726
00:36:52,379 --> 00:36:53,547
Yes. I love my manolos.
727
00:36:54,840 --> 00:36:56,091
You know,I'm telling
you it is a great idea,
728
00:36:56,133 --> 00:37:04,266
And it would work-- not the
slide part. But "rooftop." thanks.
729
00:37:04,308 --> 00:37:06,059
That's good, Danny, good job.
730
00:37:06,101 --> 00:37:07,895
Excellent presentation,danny.
731
00:37:07,936 --> 00:37:11,607
Thank you. The floor's all yours.
732
00:37:15,777 --> 00:37:16,528
I'm thinking about an ice bar.
733
00:37:24,953 --> 00:37:30,000
I guess we should put it
up to a vote. Yeah. Okay.
734
00:37:31,293 --> 00:37:33,253
I gotta go, so, sorry.
I have work and stuff.
735
00:37:33,295 --> 00:37:36,048
All right, Sam, see you later. Bye.
736
00:37:36,089 --> 00:37:47,434
Don't you dare, the baby.
I got this. Yeah. Okay.
737
00:37:47,476 --> 00:37:49,102
Danny, you do the honors.
738
00:37:49,102 --> 00:37:51,230
Okay, here we go.
739
00:37:51,271 --> 00:38:11,542
The moment of truth.
Ice bar. ice bar. ice bar.
740
00:38:12,793 --> 00:38:17,339
And... Cooper's ice bar.
741
00:38:17,965 --> 00:38:18,465
Well, I guess it's unanimous.
742
00:38:22,719 --> 00:38:26,098
Thank you for all your support.
743
00:38:26,890 --> 00:38:28,851
But we're gonna do "the rooftop."
744
00:38:28,892 --> 00:38:30,894
Although,I think we'll change the name.
745
00:38:30,894 --> 00:38:32,896
Okay. But we voted...
746
00:38:32,938 --> 00:38:34,273
Danny's idea is better.
747
00:38:35,691 --> 00:38:37,359
I told you I'd expand your client base,
748
00:38:37,401 --> 00:38:38,318
You'll just have to trust me.
749
00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:41,864
Open up. Open up.
750
00:38:43,740 --> 00:38:47,619
This is Cynthia, Tracey, and a
whole bunch of other people.
751
00:38:47,661 --> 00:38:49,955
They just got back from the
"thunder down under" show
752
00:38:49,997 --> 00:38:52,082
were they got a little...
753
00:38:52,124 --> 00:38:53,542
Naughty. naughty.
754
00:38:53,584 --> 00:38:55,377
The "thunder down under" got all over.
755
00:38:55,419 --> 00:38:58,213
We are so screwed if our
husbands find out about this.
756
00:38:58,255 --> 00:39:04,178
What do you think? Come on in.
757
00:39:05,971 --> 00:39:08,515
The spa was booked, so you caught a show.
758
00:39:08,557 --> 00:39:09,683
We've got ticket stubs to "mamma mia,"
759
00:39:09,725 --> 00:39:11,268
And you'll be putting
them in your purses.
760
00:39:11,268 --> 00:39:14,104
Do me a favor, hang back.
we're gonna start with you.
761
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:32,623
Ladies and gentlemen,let's
give it up for ne-yo. whoo!
762
00:39:38,504 --> 00:39:39,630
I'm gonna be honest.
763
00:39:39,671 --> 00:39:41,381
This is my first annulment party ever.
764
00:39:41,423 --> 00:39:46,762
It's a little weird,but this
is vegas, right? Let's go.
765
00:40:25,050 --> 00:40:26,635
you got everything you need back there?
766
00:40:26,677 --> 00:40:48,198
Yeah, you, want a drink? No. Maybe just
one. Make it happen. now, I... interesting.
767
00:40:48,240 --> 00:40:50,826
What's interesting? Them.
768
00:40:50,868 --> 00:41:01,336
you were married under strange circum-
stances once. and you. once. and? and...
769
00:41:01,378 --> 00:41:03,547
That's none of your business.
770
00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:11,054
...favorite songwriter. Oh, really?
771
00:41:12,681 --> 00:41:16,435
Hey, you, have a seat.
772
00:41:16,476 --> 00:41:23,525
They are so still married.
to--me. to us.
773
00:41:23,567 --> 00:41:25,444
What are you talking about?
774
00:41:25,485 --> 00:41:28,071
Planets don't lie, Danny.
775
00:41:28,071 --> 00:41:30,490
Those two did not go through
with the annulment.
776
00:41:30,532 --> 00:41:33,076
Are you sure?
take a look.
777
00:41:36,121 --> 00:41:39,541
Cooper's not gonna be happy.
778
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:43,504
Nope. But Mike and Piper are.
779
00:41:43,554 --> 00:41:48,104
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