All language subtitles for I.Married.Who.2012.HDTV.x264-W4F

No. No, I'm at my
fiancee's house right now.

Have him call me at
my apartment tonight.

Okay, well, then we'll have to postpone

until halpern has documentation

to justify these corporate deductions.

Exactly.

And, Carla, make sure you
bill them for this phone call.

I am all packed.

We'll go as soon as
Peter's off his call.

Yeah, okay, look, I'm
gonna be in the office

in about an hour. We'll
deal with this then.

- Okay.
- Awesome!

I'm gonna go get my
suitcase. Vegas, baby!

Vegas, baby.

See, I just... i don't understand

why you go to Vegas, of all places.

Jordan, you could have

a perfectly awesome bachelorette
party right here in town.

I'm the first one to get married,

and the girls want to send me off right.

Yeah, I'll bet they do.

Listen...

You're not going to drink, are you?

Do I ever?

Peter, this is me we're
talking about here...

boring, predictable me.

I have the weekend
planned out to the minute.

There's no room for shenanigans.

I promise. What a pair we make.

Yes, we do.

Hey, Jordan?

Wow.

Listen, why don't you
leave the ring with me?

- Why?
- It was my grandmother's.

- It has very sentimental value.
- You don't trust me?

No, it's not you,
it's all those vagrants

and addict gamblers in Vegas.

- Take care of it for me.
- I will.

This beautiful ring will be in my safe,

awaiting the return of
my beautiful fiancee.

- Let's go to Vegas.
- Let's go to Vegas.

♪

That looks disgusting.

Jordy, this is your big night,

your last hurrah, so to speak.

I like being in control.

It suits me. Plus I promised Peter.

Jordy... You know we love you.

So we say this with nothing

but your best interests at heart.

As your friends, we're concerned

Peter just isn't the one for you.

- Subtle, Jess.
- Sorry, I couldn't help myself.

I know you guys aren't
big fans of Peter's,

but he's just been really stressed out

and I'm trying to make
things easier on him.

He'll go back to normal
once he gets this promotion.

Okay, if you say so.

- Drinks, ladies?
- Yes!

Can I have a pina colada?

Ooh, I'll have the same.
Virgin, please, no rum.

Wh... what?

You guys remember the winter formal.

The last time Jordan was truly fun.

I ended up on the
back of a motorcycle

30 miles away with a
guy named "snake breath".

And you lost my favorite shoes.

Which is why I am not drinking.

Virgin, definitely.

I will have another
one of these, please.

The best thing about being single,

nobody cares what I do.

And I will take her rum in my pina,

and then a little extra
on top of that, please.

Okay.

And did you want the pint or the yard?

We want the biggest you got.

- Whoo!
- We are celebrating.

Well, some of us are.

I promise to let loose
as much as humanly possible.

You never know.

My gosh. My gosh, my gosh.

- What?
- Matt Swift.

The Matt Swift?

The movie star.

Wow, it's Matt Swift.

- I love him.
- I love him.

- I don't like his movies.
- Who cares about his movies?

He's gorgeous, he's famous,
and he's five feet away,

and I am freaking out.

I can't turn around.

He's kind of short.

All right, two straws, virgin,

and one straw, extra super lots of rum.

- Is he looking over here?
- My...

we need to make him look this way.

- He is gorgeous.
- My... he's so hot.

- Hi.
- Whoo!

- Hello.
- Yes!

Wow, girl.

- And, um... Virgin.
- Thank you.

- And extra super lots of rum.
- Whoo, yeah!

No, we should cheers Matt.

- Matt!
- Matt!

He cheers-ed back. Cheers.

This is delicious. Cheers, ladies.

You think that's delicious?

You should try the
one with the rum in it.

- Whoo!
- Wow.

So anyway...

so, all of a sudden,
there's a knock at the door,

and I open the door,
and I said "hello..."

♪

My head's gonna explode.

I have some aspirin if you need it.

Um, hello?

Hi.

Headache?

I'm Matt. We met last night.

I know who you are.

Last night a little hazy?

I'm... i mean...

You're Matt Swift.

I am.

And I'm here with
you in your hotel room.

- Yes.
- Right.

Well, you and your wonderful mask

couldn't remember your room number,

let alone walk back to it.

So I slept here...

On this couch.

Yeah.

And I slept in the next room, in my bed.

Where are my friends?

Your friends.

They went with my manager
Eric, to go celebrate.

- Celebrate what?
- Let me help you.

- Celebrate the wedding.
- Without me?

And they just... they...
they... they just...

Left me here with a stranger?

Wh... stranger? I'm
a pretty respectable guy.

Don't panic.

Everything has an explanation.

Please tell me this is a dream.

It's a dream, right?

'Cause if it's not a dream,
then I have just stolen

somebody's really
humongous, gorgeous diamond.

Room service.

Nice.

All right. You like pancakes?

Can we talk about last night?

Amazing, right?

Thank you, my friend.

Amazing?

Yeah, and, you know, I'm shooting

this super stressful movie right now,

so I really needed to
blow off some steam.

Thank you for that.

We were on stage with
a journey cover band.

Journey is my absolute favorite.

I know, I know. That's
how you got me on stage.

You were really going
for the high notes.

- And then what happened?
- Well, you don't remember.

You won me $6,000 at the craps table.

It was so great.

Every time you'd go to roll the dice...

okay, you're welcome.
Then what happened?

We went to that new club,

the one where all the waiters,

they wear the outfits
made out of tinfoil.

That sounds really weird. What else?

And then we got married.

All right, let's eat.

No.

I mean, I kind of thought that...

no, this is really, really, really bad.

...is it legal?

It sure was, wife.

Why do I feel so
horrible? I didn't drink.

I don't...

She must have switched our drinks.

One straw was rum. I got the rum!

Look, I really think
you're just overreacting.

Do you now? Really?

Do you know why I was in town?

It's my bachelorette party.

The bachelorette...

wait, you... Are the bride?

I didn't tell you that last night?

No, you just kept
saying that weddings

were stressful and overrated,

and that you just wished
you could get it over with,

which, technically, we did.

- This is so bad.
- Come on.

Let's eat. Come on.

I'm gonna call the lawyers.

Tomorrow, we're gonna get an annulment.

Boom, two days from now,

we are both gonna be single again.

- Really?
- Yes. Sit.

It's that easy?

I pay a lot of money
for these lawyers.

Eat. You will feel better.

Eat.

Good morning, Julie.

Do you remember me?
Eric, Matt's manager?

Sure. Sort of, a little bit,

- but not really at all.
- Can I help you?

You look a little lost.

I lost my key and
forgot my room number.

We having some regrets, Julie?

Yes, thousands. You
promise I'll hear from him?

I promise.

- And what if I don't?
- You will.

- But what if I don't?
- But you will.

But I don't know either of you.

I don't know if you're
telling me the truth.

All right, look, here is my card.

If you need anything,
just give me a call.

You got nothing to worry about.

We're gonna take care of this.

We got it covered, trust me.

And, by the way, for the
annulment and everything,

my name is Jordan. Jordan Grady.

Jordan. Got it.

The chief ordered

the toughest cops in the city

- to clean up the mean streets.
- Freeze.

- This guy wasn't one of them.
- Freeze!

From the comedy team that makes

the movies that make you laugh

comes the story of one man's fight

- for truth, justice...
- Freeze!

- And pastrami.
- Freeze!

Matt Swift is Mike storm: Rookie cop.

What have I done?

Of course I have
photographic evidence.

I'm not an idiot.

That's what you're offering?

Daily gossipoffered three times that.

Well, I'm sorry we couldn't
do business together.

Wait, wait, hang on, hang on.

- What's that?
- $25,000.

That is a number I can work with.

Wait, wait, turn it off, turn it off.

No, you two have
some explaining to do.

Okay, okay, can you guys
please tell me... what is this?

That's your list of
things to do while in Vegas.

And do you see anywhere
on this list where it says

"marry someone who is not your fiance"?

Yeah, I don't see that on there.

Jordan, you are Mrs. Matt Swift.

That is huge. That is super huge.

He wouldn't even marry
that chick from that sitcom

that he dated for,
like, five years, so...

It's Peter.

- What are you gonna tell him?
- Nothing! Nothing.

Matt said that we could
get a quickie annulment,

and it could be over in,
like, one to two days.

So... Peter will not understand.

We take this to the grave.

- To the grave.
- Okay.

I promise.

Hi, sweetie, how are you?

Good, you're awake.

Didn't want you to miss your flight.

That is so sweet. You
always think of me, honey.

I'm heading into
the office for a little

before picking you girls up.

You know, you work too hard.

You should give yourself a break.

Idle hands don't
make partner by summer.

Billable hours do.

You're right. I understand, honey.

So is last night's wedding
the biggest mistake of her life,

or is this one?

There he is. All right.

Hey.

There's my bride. How you doing, honey?

Great.

And... I kept it safe for you.

Thank you. Felt so weird without it,

like something was missing.

Oof, Betty, Wilma, you
two look worse for the wear.

Now, if you didn't drink, like jordy,

you'd be feeling much better today.

Yeah, jordy's way
better off than us today.

So how was the bachelor bash?

Terrible.

I drank two beers and
triple-bogeyed every hole.

Just can't think straight
under the influence, you know?

- Really ruined my day.
- I know how you feel.

So we can put the Martins
at table 11 with the busbys,

or the buzzkills, as
I like to call them.

What do you think, sweetie?

- What, mom?
- Aren't you paying attention?

This is your wedding.

I'm not doing this because I enjoy it.

I just can't seat
people I don't know.

It doesn't feel right.

Don't mind her.

She's still tired and cranky

from her little bachelorette bash.

I keep saying that Vegas
is one disgusting town.

You know, I've never
understood the draw of gambling.

It seems ridiculous to throw your money

at something with such
a low rate of return.

It's the thrill,

the challenge of trying
to beat the house.

Are you feeling okay?

I certainly hope that you are
not coming down with something.

I'm fine. Just a little tired.

Get over it, darling.

Weddings don't plan themselves.

Why hasn't he called?
It's been two days.

It's been one day.

- It feels like ten.
- He'll call.

- How do you know?
- I'm very psychic.

No, you're not.

Look, he's married
too. It's not just you.

Though I find it highly unfair

that Jess and I can't find one husband,

and at the present time, you have two.

Don't envy me. I
am a very bad person,

who can't own up to my own mistakes.

I'm having a very hard
time living with myself.

- You can always come clean.
- Not that hard a time.

- These aren't the right size.
- They were cute.

These are the big size.

We have to have the small
size with these tins.

They bubble.

Good morning. Hi, Benny.

- Hello?
- Hey, jordy.

- Alan's on his way in.
- Thank you.

The welby house has closed.

That was so quick.

You're doing a good job, Jordan.

It's not going unnoticed.

Thank you, Alan.

- Is that your fiance?
- Where?

He's still your fiance?

Yes, of course.

Hi, sweetie. What a nice surprise.

- Hey, Peter.
- Hi.

I can explain.

So Vegas was so uneventful

that you simply forgot to mention this?

I'm so sorry.

It was really just a
big misunderstanding

that spiraled out of
control, and I am fixing it.

The foundation of a
solid relationship is trust,

and you go and pull a stunt like this?

Peter, I am so sorry.
You have to know that.

And you said you
wouldn't drink, Jordan.

And I didn't. I mean, I tried not to.

But what?

You were force-fed by Jose cuervo?

Peter, there was a mix-up.

I accidentally got Claire's drink,

and then, the next thing
I knew, we were married.

I knew you would react like this,

which is why I wanted
to handle it first.

Of course I react like this.

Wh... what, were you
looking for my blessing?

Peter, nothing happened.

No, a marriage happened, Jordan.

That's not nothing.

It was an innocent, yet
severe lapse of judgment,

and I promise it will
not ever happen again.

And how does all this

not interfere with
our impending nuptials?

Matt's taking care of it.

Matt's taking care of it.

So he's "Matt" to you now.

Listen, we are going
to get an annulment,

and then we can just pretend
like none of this ever happened.

When?

As soon as his lawyers call me.

And then I am going to marry you,

and we are going to have
a great life together.

Stuff to bring on honeymoon...

Okay.

I am not giving any interviews.

No comment.

That's good, that's good.

They're gonna keep calling
you. Just keep saying that.

- You have no comment.
- Who is this?

It's Matt.

Please tell me you're calling
to say we have our annulment.

No, not yet, but we
should know something

in the next few days.

Time is of the essence here, Matt.

I know, I know, and Eric's
informed the attorneys of that.

Look, Jordan, I'm sorry you
got dragged into my madness.

I can't blow my nose these days

without it making it into the tabloids.

Who did this? Who
gave them that picture?

Could have been anyone.

Room service guy, the chapel
people, a cab driver... anyone.

People are always looking
to make a quick buck.

At our expense.

Look, we're gonna
get this taken care of.

We'll get it done.

As soon as possible, please.

My fiance is not happy.

Who wants some moo shu?

I'll trade you for
sweet and sour chicken.

- Do you have any chopsticks?
- In the utensil drawer.

I should've brought
them from my apartment.

- He's so moody.
- You would be too

if your fiancee married
someone who wasn't you.

I blame you.

Well, I blame you
too, for my predicament.

Boo-hoo, poor you.

I married a movie star.

My husband's the hottest
guy in the universe.

Turn the oven on, I am so going in.

I didn't want this, all right?

I don't even think he's a good actor.

Then can I have him?

You don't have chopsticks.

I'm sorry, I thought I did.

It's no problem. Let's
just put in the movie.

I hear it's funny.

And we all could use a little
bit of a laugh right now.

...mystery wife of
movie star Matt Swift.

Hollywood has learned exclusively

that the bride, Jordan Grady,
works as a real estate agent...

- My.
- For Pratt brothers realty.

Not only was this marriage
kept well under wraps,

but evidently Ms. Grady
was scheduled to marry

this man, attorney Peter Drake,

in just a few weeks.

While this top secret wedding seemed

to catch all of Hollywood off guard,

no one seems to be more
surprised than Lauren deblanc.

I've always said that
Matthew is a narcissist

that suffers from a severe
case of arrested development,

and unless one can marry oneself,

he would never tie the knot.

But color me in the wrong.

Go ahead and do it, because how silly!

He just up and married some
random gold digger he just met.

Jordan.

Undoubtedly, we have not
heard the last of Jordan Grady.

You just went from anonymous
to notorious in, like, 15 flat.

Yeah, that was a great laugh.

I... i need to... i
need to get some air.

- Hello.
- Come, come on.

So here's the latest
report from studio marketing

- Rookie cop.
- Ooh, thanks.

Okay. Well, it's tracking better.

Wow... Much better.

Your plan is working.

Scandal broke two days ago,

and interest in the
movie's up 240% already.

- Wow, that's a lot of percent.
- It is.

Um, Matt is going to be

on the cover ofpeoplemagazine next week.

Yay! Quest p. R. Called this morning.

His wife too.

This whole thing has made
Matt Swift quite intriguing.

Yay, I love that.

Burt feedler called this morning,

and he is ready to go
through with the annulment.

He just needs a little
bit more information, so...

You know what? Let's hold off.

Let it ride for a little while,

at least until the movie opens.

Should I let Matt know?

I'll let him know when
I see him on the set later.

Okay, I will not say a word.

Why are you whispering?

Halfway there.

Thank you so much for
helping with the place cards.

I just hope it isn't all for nothing.

Passive-aggressive doesn't suit you, mom.

I prefer you aggressive-aggressive.

Fine, then I will be aggressive-aggressive.

Jordan Elizabeth Grady,
you have no one to blame

for this predicament but yourself.

I don't mean to pry,

but why would you have gone
and done something like this?

I don't know. I guess
I just freaked out.

I mean, things have been so
crazy with the wedding planning,

and Peter was stressed.

I guess I just got
carried away by a moment.

Moments are just
that, sweetie... moments.

Marriage is forever.

So you better make
sure itwasjust a moment,

and not some sort of... Cry for help.

It was just a moment.
I am positive of that,

and I am doing everything
I can to fix it.

Well, good, or your
dad's going to lose it,

because he's already put down $4,300

in non-refundable deposits.

Okay, please tell daddy not to worry.

This wedding is happening.

I am sure the annulment is
going through as we speak.

All right, come
on, give me your best.

Show me what you got. I'm ready.

- No problem.
- You are out of shape.

Come on, don't blame me
for my avatar's shortcomings?

I'm a phone jockey.
What do you want from me?

Hey, which, by the way,

is ringing off the
hook for you, my friend.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

- New business or old business?
- New.

Quite new.

- Yeah?
- Come on.

Quest p. R. Tells me that suddenly

Rookie cop is 72% interest.

Forget this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, man,
you're up from 12%.

This is good for you.

Is this 'cause of the marriage?

It most definitely is
because of the marriage.

Go figure, Hollywood.

The only place where bad publicity

suddenly is good for your career.

What are you talking
about, bad publicity?

It's just publicity.

And if we hold off on the annulment

until after the movie opens,

we are looking at a very
big weekend, my friend.

She's supposed to
get married really soon.

I'm just talking
about a little while,

a matter of days.

She'll have plenty of
time to get married.

Everybody wins here, Matt.

Come on, we need this.

Youneed this. Your career needs this.

Okay, but the second the movie opens,

- you make this thing happen.
- Done, you got it.

There she is, there she is.

- Got it?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No!

- My goodness.
- I was violated.

There's a peeping tom outside,
and he just saw me naked.

- What are you talking about?
- Go look, go look.

They found out where I live.

My gosh, they're probably
going through our trash.

This is insane. It's been two days.

I want my life back.

You call them today
and rail into them...

okay, don't worry. I will
put a stop to this today.

No, no, no.

You're... shh.

Over here, over here. Hey, jordy.

I will have you know
that this is illegal.

You are trespassing on private property.

Hey, the grass may
be private property,

but the sidewalk lives in
the public domain, toots.

Okay, well, my fiance's a lawyer.

All right.

Jordy, jordy, one more shot.

Come on. Hey, roll down
your window, at least!

Whoo! Eric Spencer's office.

Hi, my name is Jordan Grady...

um, hold please.

This is going to
need signatures asap.

Eric Spencer's office.

- My name is jor...
- one moment please.

I'm so sorry. We are just...

the phones are on fire today.

Eric Spencer's office.

Listen, it is imperative
that I speak with Matt Swift.

My name is Jordan Grady,

and I desperately need to talk with him.

Okay, desperate, sounds important.

Hold, please. I have that number.

Ooh, hate when that happens.

It's my first day. I
have that number here.

Somewhere... If you could...

my goodness, outsmarted myself.

All righty.
818-555-0124.

Thank you so much. I
really appreciate your help.

Thank you.

Hey, it's belinda here,

and you've reached the official
Matt Swift fan club line!

If you'd like to join,
leave your name and address

after the tone, and I'll
send you a membership kit.

We can be united forever as soul sisters

in our love for Matt Swift!

I don't know how people do it.

I feel like I'm living in a fish bowl.

I feel like a public spectacle.

Peter is so humiliated.

I can't even look at him.
I'm just racked with guilt.

- Try calling that manager guy.
- I did.

And my autographed picture will
arrive in four to six weeks.

He said he'd take my calls.

Guess what. He's not taking my calls.

- So now what?
- I don't know.

You need to go to the premiere.

Rookie cop is opening tomorrow night.

Vanessa's firm is covering publicity.

- Could she get me in?
- Please, I'm her roommate.

She can't even get me in.

Great plan. Well thought-out.

Just show up.

Talk to him. How hard can it be?

Silly of me to think
this would be difficult.

There he is, there he is. Matt!

- Hey, Matt!
- Matt, Matt, Matt!

- Come here, come here.
- Matt!

- Matt, come here.
- This is a great plan.

Come here. Matt, Matt, come here.

Listen, Matt, Matt... go, just go.

- No.
- Go, go, just go.

There is a barricade
here for a reason, Claire.

As if you can't jump
over a three-foot rope.

I'm gonna distract
the security guard.

You just go. Hey, hey, hey!

Excuse me! Excuse me.
Yeah, you, come on.

Come on. Come here.

Do you work out?

I just love a guy in uniform.

Is that a bulletproof vest under there?

- It is, isn't it?
- No.

Sorry, sorry, excuse me.
I need to talk to Matt.

I know you! You're...

my name is Jordan Grady.

I am Matt's wife.

And I have been trying
to get a hold of you.

Right, right, of course.
I... that's where I've seen you.

Look, I am so sorry I haven't
gotten back in touch with you.

I mean, it has been crazy
with this movie premiere.

Well, it's been a
little crazy for me too,

seeing as how I can't
get my marriage license

for my upcoming wedding
until I'm single...

which will be when exactly?

Yeah, one sec, okay?

Hey, Matt, excuse me. I am so sorry.

Please, come here, just for a second.

Look who's here. Your wifey showed up.

I'd prefer if you
didn't call me that.

- Hey, whoa, guys, guys.
- Excuse me, whoa.

Guys, it's okay. She's with me.

- Okay, okay.
- Sorry about that.

Thank you, I wasn't really
in the mood to go to jail.

Can we please talk?

Yes, I... Need to
take care of this first.

Do you... Do you want to see the movie?

- Then can we talk?
- Definitely, definitely.

Here.

There she goes.

Jordan, I'm sorry I took so long

to get in touch with you.

What's your name?

- Shelly.
- With an "e-y"?

No, just "y".

You didn't get in touch with me.

I stalked you and risked arrest.

Right, and I'm sorry about that.

I've just been so busy
promoting the film.

Shelly, you are as pretty as your name.

Um, we need to talk about
our little problem here.

Wait, can you sign
one for my sister Beth?

How about "to my good friend, Beth"?

She'd like that a really lot.

Um, Peter and I have
done some research,

and apparently getting an
annulment is not as easy

as what you might think.

Eric's got it covered.

You have documents and pie charts.

This is not the same
girl I met in Vegas.

My guard was down.

There you go. Well, maybe you should

let your guard down a little more often.

- It is!
- Look, Matt...

- can we have one?
- Sure, of course.

Thank you so much. My name is Suzie.

There you go, Suzie.

So you gonna see my movie?

Yeah, of course I am.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

And I wanted to
give this back to you.

Keep it. I bought it for you.

Or you could sell it.

Thank you, but I can't.

It's blood money.

My happy future may have died for it.

What's your favorite charity?

- Cancer society.
- We'll donate it to them.

Really? You'd do that?

If you'll sit back down.

Listen, I feel horrible about this...

Although, it does take two to marry.

I still can't believe we did that.

I can't believeldid that.

Why did you do it?
Why'd you marry me?

Well, you know, I've
thought about it a lot,

and I really think it was your smile.

- It hooked me.
- There she is.

There's the girl I know and married,

the no-nonsense smart aleck.

She comes out every once in a while.

Well, keep her
coming. I like that girl.

Although you still haven't
answered my question.

- Why'd you do it?
- Um...

Honestly, I think...

All the time, about everything.

My brain never shuts up.

And that night, I just turned it off

and lived in the moment.

Turn it off. Words to live by.

- If only I could.
- You can.

You just choose not to.

Why did you marry me?

Because we had a blast.

My philosophy's always
been look before you leap...

Then look again, ten more times.

My way's more fun than yours.

Well, my way's less
complicated than your way.

You might have a point.

As evidenced by the
endless stream of flashbulbs

- currently bombarding us.
- You know what,

let's get you out of
here before you go blind.

I've got my car at the theater.

I'll give you a ride home.

Eric's taking care of things.
Soon this will be done.

Then you can rush off
and marry hubby number two

and live happily ever after.

Where are you guys staying tonight?

- No comment!
- Atta girl.

Come on, Matt, smile.

Yes!

Initial box office numbers are in.

$8 million on the day,

projecting to a $32 million weekend

and the number one spot.
The studio is pleased.

They are quite pleased.
They're talking sequel already.

This is a fluke. Don't they get it?

A sequel would be ridiculous.

All they care about is
the bottom line, my friend.

And right now, the bottom line
is looking quite appealing.

Great, then let's revisit
that indie movie that I like.

Matt, you can't go
and do $2 million indies

when you're this hot.

They want franchises with you.

I know what I'm talking
about on this, Matt.

- You've got to trust me.
- I know.

I know, I trust you.

This is a big weekend for you.

You won it. Enjoy it.

- You won it!
- At someone else's expense.

Hey, now that the movie's open,

let's make this annulment
thing happen, okay?

You got it, buddy.

I will get Burt on it right away.

- Cool.
- All right.

- You have a good shoot today.
- Great.

- Later.
- Thanks.

Come on, Gibbs.

This isn't a settlement,
this is an insult.

No, i...

when they showed up last night

to the premiere of his new movie...

I'll call you back.

And heartthrob Matt
Swift wasted no time

squiring his new bride around town.

No, listen, our
position remains the same.

We have no comment.

Yeah, and in terms of
those pregnancy rumors...

...really?

I thought everyone had heard those.

Yeah, people are calling
me left and right asking me,

but... no, again no comment!

She's pregnant?

I didn't say she was pregnant.

I didn't say she wasn't pregnant.

She very well may
be... Or she may not be.

- Who knows?
- Keeping it fresh in the press.

I don't want a $32
million weekend, Vivienne.

- No.
- I want a $42 million weekend.

- Yes!
- Come on.

- Up top! High five!
- Yes!

- Taste it! Taste it!
- Yes.

- Yes!
- Yes!

All right, all right, come
on. What's next? What've we got?

Let's ratchet it down. All right.

Moving onward and upward...
let me get my pen, sorry.

No, no, no, no, put
that down, put that down.

Let me help you.

You are not supposed to
be lifting heavy things.

What are you talking about?

Now they're just making stuff up.

You need to sit down
and not over-exert yourself.

I can't believe I had
to find out this way.

I am your best friend.

I don't need to,
'cause I'm not pregnant.

Are you sure? Have you taken a test?

I don't need to take
a test. I'm not pregnant.

How do you feel about
your fiancee Jordan

marrying Matt Swift?

I'm going to go out on a
limb and guess that's Peter.

I am a lawyer.

This is private property.
You all are trespassing.

Open the door, honey!

Give us something.

Let's go talk in my room.

And then bishop,

he came into my office, and he said,

"is this really the
image you want to portray

to the senior partners?"

None of it's true.

One part is true. You
went to his premiere.

I had no choice.

I had to find out what was going on.

And what is going on?

His lawyers are working on it.

It does not take this
long to file a petition.

I've done it a thousand times.

He assured me that
everything is on track

for the annulment to
go through this week.

It had better be,

or I'm taking matters into my own hands.

- I am tired of waiting.
- So am I.

- Are you?
- Yes.

I hope that's true, Jordan.

Now, I have to get back to the office.

You just... you...

you sit here and you
think about what you did.

It's a sham.

Don't insult the nice lady, Jordan.

It's a beautiful dress.

That's not what I
mean. I'm an imposter.

You're only supposed to wear
white to your first wedding.

Elizabeth Taylor wore white
at five out of eight weddings.

It really is an archaic concept,

so could we do away with
that large Scarlet a, please?

This is supposed to be
the happiest day of my life,

and he's ruining it.

Yeah, if only he hadn't
clubbed you over the head

and dragged you to the altar,

you wouldn't be in this predicament.

By the way, we could always
let it out in the stomach area

to accommodate any unexpected
growth, couldn't we?

Mom, how many times
do I have to tell you?

I'm not pregnant.

These days, jordy,

I just don't know what to believe.

I'm not pregnant.

He called? The security guard?

Yes, his name is Chris,

and he's an aspiring screenwriter.

We're going out on Saturday night.

He was cute.

I'm glad some good came
out of this debacle.

You have to come with me.

Claire, I can't go with
you on your first date.

You have to!

I do everything wrong,

and I don't want to screw it up.

I need you to run interference
between me and my mouth.

Okay, I will see
if Peter wants to go.

We can double date if
you need a chaperone.

I've got to go. Okay, goodbye.

'Kay, bye.

Hey, you got a minute?

I was just going
over my new listings.

So this circus is getting
a little out of hand,

don't you think?

I am so, so sorry, Alan.

I'm really, really trying
to handle the situation.

Maybe you should take some time off,

get the whole thing squared away.

Are you firing me?

No, nothing like that.

It's just, it's a bit disruptive to me

and co-workers and...

You were going to take
time off for the honeymoon.

You'll just... Start a little sooner.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- Eric Spencer's office.
- Do not put me on hold.

This is Jordan Grady,

I am the current wife of Matt Swift,

and I need to speak with Eric urgently.

Okay, just one moment, please.

Hey, Jordan, how are you?

I'm not happy. Thank you for asking.

Is there anything
I can do about that?

I am sick of waiting for
you people to contact me.

I know, I know, I'm so sorry.

These things take time.

You know, I keep hearing
that and still no progress.

So I need you to put me in
touch with Matt Swift today.

That is easier said
than done. He's a busy guy.

He's shooting a movie.

All I have to do is
walk outside my front door,

and I have the attention
of the entire press corps,

so you have him call
me or I go out there

and I make up some very dirty... Dirt.

Okay, um, I'll tell you what,

why don't you come by the
studio Monday, say 1:00-ish?

That's what I thought you'd say.

I'm actually pretty pleased
with the latest draft, so...

I'll hear if the agent's
interested next week.

That's great, Chris.
Good luck with that.

Thanks.

You know who would
actually be great for this

is Matt Swift.

I know it's a lot to
ask, but do you think that

there's any way you
could slip him a script?

I don't really know him.

Wh... i thought that you were...

You know, I read something today,

that the term "getting fired,"

it actually stems from olden days

where they would just
burn people's houses down

- and get rid of them.
- Really?

Wow, where did you read

that random yet fascinating tidbit?

Cosmo.

It's really great that
we have evolved as a people.

Have we evolved?

'Cause I don't think so.

- Hi, my name is Jordan...
- yes, miss Grady.

Your husband's expecting you.

So you just want to
go straight down here,

make a left, and then you'll see

a parking space clearly
marked with your name.

- Have a nice day.
- Thanks.

Can we get this lovely
lady leaning on the car?

Thank you.

And the older gentleman,
we need him on his mark.

Hi, miss Grady.

We have a chair for you over here.

Thank you. And it's Jordan.

- Rolling!
- Marks.

We're about to break for lunch.

You can watch the
action in that monitor.

Marks.

And... Action.

You think you've got problems?

We all got problems, Mickey.

Some of us just deal with
them better than others.

Some of us don't rat out our friends

when the going gets tough.

Some of us live by a code of loyalty...

And others don't.

So... Where do you live, Mickey?

Where do you live?

And cut. Beautiful, gentlemen.

All right, that's the one.

- And, that's lunch.
- Background, back to places.

Hey, little lady.
First time on a movie set?

You are quite the show off.

Well, thank you very
much. What'd you think?

I'm no expert, but I thought

you were a little stiff.

Stiff?

Really? How?

I don't know, it just
didn't seem very natural.

Hold that thought.

Cal...

I want to go again.
I just... another one.

Buddy, it was perfect.
You don't need another take.

No, no, no, I was stiff.

I was stiff.

Guys, I'm sorry about this.
We're gonna go one more time.

Let's take it back to one.

- All right, everybody back.
- Good.

Back to one.

One more time.

- Thank you.
- There you go.

- How nice.
- Enjoy.

Thank you.

My last three films have bombed,

Rookie cop, it's a fluke.

I've been getting bad
advice for too long now,

and I trust your judgment.

Why? You don't even know me.

'Cause you call it as it is, Jordan.

You never ask for anything.
You don't have an angle.

That's not true. I want an annulment.

See?

You're blowing holes
in my theory already.

That's what I'm talking about.

Hollywood is this opportunistic world.

You never know who to trust.

And then along comes
this big blue-eyed girl

who... not to brag... is in a position

that a lot of girls would want to be in,

and all you want is out.

So I should consider myself lucky?

Absolutely. Sweepstakes lucky.

You did say that night it was fate.

Are you sure I said
"fate" and not "fake"?

I don't think you said
"fake brought us together".

Maybe you should
have your ears checked.

I think you need
to realize you said it

- and you should own it.
- Okay, fine, I said it.

But just because I said
it doesn't mean I meant it.

Of course, whatever you say.

Look, Matt...

You are not the vapid,
egotistical, Hollywood actor

that I thought you were.

Well, give me some time.

I'll actually get to that point.

But I would like my
life to go back to normal.

No more cameras in my bathroom window,

no more timeline: Hollywoodreports.

Peter can't even look at me.

He's like a stranger,
and I don't blame him.

Does he know how hard you're
working to fix this mess?

I don't think he cares.
He wants results now.

Well, he's gonna get results.

We're going to be single by Friday.

Just try to keep your week open.

I hope so.

If you'll notice, in this article,

not all annulments are granted.

It really depends on the judge.

Organized there.

Look, Eric's told us... he's assured me,

they're going to tell us
whatever we need to know

so that the annulment will be granted.

I guess I have no
choice but to trust you.

And, just so you know,

I wouldn't have gone
to the press about you.

Well, by the way, just so you know,

I never really thought you would.

You're a good person, Jordan Grady.

You're not the best
judge of acting talent,

but you're a good person.

Come on, Mickey.

What's it gonna be?

I told you, carmine,
I'm in it with you 100%.

I ain't no rat.

Really? That's the best you can do?

It's no worse than what you just did.

Thank you, thank you.

All right, this is serious, Jordan.

- Okay?
- Okay.

You're playing an
80-year-old lifetime gangster.

Channel the mobster.

Just feel the mobster.

- Just be the mobster.
- Okay, okay.

I'm sorry to ruin your scene.

Let's try this again.

I told you, carmine.

I'm in it wit' you 100%.

I ain't no rat.

Yeah, you know what,

I'm thinking you're more
of the gangster's moll.

Let's... let's try that, the Lana scene.

- Okay.
- Yeah.

Yeah, let's try that.

- Hey, how you doing, sir?
- Good.

I'm Matt Swift's attorney.

I have these documents for him to sign.

Okay. What's your name?

Look, guy, I'm here
every other day to see him.

You do this to me every time.

Thank you very much.

I've had enough of you, all right?

You think you work for rocko?
No, you work for me now.

You watch him, all right?

Hey, hey, hey, you are on my set.

- Whoa!
- What's going on?

Who is this guy?

What is going on here?

No problem, I'm all set here.

Please escort that
gentleman off the lot.

- Don't worry about it.
- Are you all right?

Who is this man?

We can work around this, Matt.

Yeah, we can't cover it
until the swelling goes down.

- It won't match.
- Okay.

Great, once again,
I don't make my day.

You, you go down to security,

and you tell them no
one gets on this set

without a pass, a picture
I.D., and a note from god!

- Do you understand me?
- Yes, sir.

Then go! Move! Move faster.

Nice shiner. You're supposed to duck.

Well, he's fast for an attorney.

Sugar ray lawyer.

Sugar ray lawyer.

That's good... Any messages?

Your mom wanted to make
sure you're eating meat

for dinner next weekend.

When did I stop?

She read it inmovieline's
famous vegetarians issue,

and wanted to double check.

And Burt feedler called,

wanted to know if he should file
the petition for annulment yet.

Wait a minute.

It was filed right
after the movie opened.

Not according to Burt.

He said he was supposed to
hold off, per your orders,

until Eric gave him the go-ahead.

You mean this process
hasn't even started yet?

Evidently not.

- Wait, wait, wait.
- Ew. I'll get the other one.

That... Is gross.

Hi.

Hey.

What's all this junk?

Nice to see you too, honey.

I thought I'd start slowly
bringing my things over,

so I don't bombard you all at once.

- Sheets and towels.
- I have sheets and towels.

For one person,

but there are going to
be two people living here,

which is why I brought
closet organizers.

Great.

So now I'll have a bunch of
mismatched sheets and towels

littering my linen closet.

I have it all charted out.

It will hardly be littering.

Hey, do whatever you want, Jordan.

Did I do something to you?

I mean, aside from the obvious.

What were you doing at
the movie studio today?

- What?
- I followed you.

I went to talk to
him about the annulment.

And is it done?

This week, by Friday.

- I see.
- Peter...

I'll tell you when this
is gonna be done, Jordan...

never, because you like this life.

You love being in the limelight.

Hollywood premieres, movie studios...

I've never seen you this happy.

Yeah, that's right,
I'm just ecstatic.

I have no job, no privacy,

and a fiance who will hardly look at me.

Well, gosh, whose
fault is this, Jordan?

How many times do
I have to apologize?

I made a mistake that
I am trying to remedy.

When will you stop punishing me?

I don't think I can trust you again.

Thank you, Peter.

Thank you for being so forthcoming.

I am glad to know who you really are

before we pledge our
lives to each other.

Hey, I hope Matt enjoys
the sheets and towels

and closet organizers.

Very big money.

Hey, look, you know I have a deal...

can I call you back? Great.

- Nice shiner.
- Whoa, nice shiner.

Thanks... To you.

The annulment was supposed
to be taken care of by now.

That... yeah, you've
got to trust that

I know what I'm doing here, Matt.

No, I told you to end this.

Yeah, and I needed
to keep you in the news,

whether you wanted it or not.

Rookie cop has exceeded
all expectations,

and... Boom! I got your quote up.

And what about her?

Who "her"? You mean the wifey?

Yes, my wife, and her name is Jordan.

You're messing with someone's life here.

So what? She's freeloading.

She's latched herself
onto your celebrity.

They're a dime a dozen in this town.

She doesn't deserve this.

Okay, fine. Okay.

No, she's a wonderful, terrific girl,

and we will fix this now, okay?

But you, my friend,
should be thanking me.

You hired me to manage you
because you trust my judgment.

Everything I've ever
done has been for you.

No, everything you've ever done is

because you got 10% riding on it.

My...

come on, man, don't
go... overreact here.

I'm not doing overreact,

just questioning whether or not

I need you as my manager any more.

I'll sue you.

- We have a contract.
- Well, thanks, Eric.

You just made that
decision a lot easier.

Look, okay, just take some
time to cool off, all right?

We'll talk about it tomorrow.

Come on, Matt.

Great. This is great.

- Vivienne.
- Yes, I am right here.

I didn't hear anything
that was happening.

- Unbelievable.
- Sorry.

Peter hasn't called.

- The wedding's off.
- He'll call, jordy.

Once he cools off.

He's not gonna throw away
your entire relationship.

Maybe that's prince charming right now.

- I'm... I'm sorry?
- Come in.

Ooh, come in, please, good sir.

Why is she talking like that?

Jordan, hi.

Matt Swift is here in my house.

- Nice shiner.
- Yeah.

Stunt gone awry. Occupational hazard.

That's why you get the big bucks.

Um... Could we have a minute?

Yeah, yeah, we'll just...
we'll leave you two alone.

Don't forget to tell
him about Chris' script.

Yeah, okay.

- Bye.
- Yes.

So I hope it's okay that I just came by.

Yeah, we were just eating pizza.

Okay.

And... I'm sorry.

I mean, the whole thing's my fault.

My first mistake was thinking
Eric and I were friends.

Yeah, aside from my family
and childhood friends,

most of the people in my
world are paid to be there.

That's sad.

Yeah. I trust too easily, I guess.

When you're in my position,

people just tell you
what you want to hear...

Except for you.

You never seem to do that, Jordan.

You never seem to.

Well, I'm glad I'm able to
please somebody these days.

Peter's still mad.

He's not speaking to me.

I don't know if we're on or we're off.

I know I'm at fault, but
he's got to give a little.

Otherwise, I don't know what we have.

Yeah, and at least now we
know what the hold up was.

The annulment's moving forward.

I don't think that matters anymore.

I mean, the urgency.

- What's he saying?
- Shh.

- I can't hear what he's saying.
- Shh.

- Does he love her?
- Hold on.

- Well...
- Go, go, go, go.

I want to tell you that
Eric wasn't the only one.

Excuse us!

We thought you guys might
want a little mood food.

Thank you. I'm good.

- Yes.
- Yeah, you are.

Wow.

Yeah.

Do you want to go out?

I mean, out.

Out?

Of here.

Yeah, we both could
use a little fun, right?

What else?

Milkshakes. Black and white.

Ooh, ooh, and mini corndogs!

Excuse me?

Two black and white milkshakes
and an order of mini corndogs.

Good call.

You want a drink drink?

Right. Sorry.

That's what got us into this mess.

Thank you.

I really think that a
table full of junk food

is exactly what we needed right now.

Agreed.

Just don't tell my personal trainer.

I already put it on my blog, sorry.

- You play?
- What?

Competitive air hockey.

- Never.
- Not even once?

- I don't know how.
- It's a piece of cake.

- Come on.
- We should get some cake.

Well, yeah, right
after the air hockey.

But my corndogs.

They have to cool. Come on.

- All right.
- Come on.

I just don't want to embarrass you

by beating you mercilessly.

You think you're gonna beat me.

I could.

You're cute and all, but
you don't seem very athletic.

Are you... look, look
at these guns right here.

I once learned how to joust
for a movie in four days.

I think I can take you
in a little air hockey.

Care to put your money
where your mouth is?

My money is always where my mouth is.

What does that even mean?

It means you're about
to get slaughtered.

Bring it on.

She shoots, she scores.

It's a hat trick for
gretzky. The crowd goes wild.

- Whoooooo.
- I can't believe it.

You... you're a ringer.

You practically forced me to play.

What was I supposed to do, let you win?

I don't cave to celebrity.

This, this is the
Jordan I know and love.

You ought to blow off
steam a little more often.

Do you think I'm uptight?

Perhaps a wee bit rigid.

I'm gonna pretend
you didn't say that,

and I'm gonna go bask in my
glory with a mini corndog.

How do they find you?

Someone tweets, and
it's a matter of minutes.

- Information super highway.
- Informationautobahn.

Come on, guys, give us a chance?

- Where'd they go?
- I don't know.

- You okay?
- Yeah.

Maybe out front.

Corndog.

Corndogs.

Missy, missy.

Looks like someone's been
out past their curfew.

And it also looks like

someone hasn't been
answering their cell...

Because Peter called me on
my cell, looking for you.

Listen, I've got to go.
I'll see you at the office.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Listen, I hope you don't
mind I already ordered,

but I have to get back to the office.

It's okay, I don't
have much of an appetite.

So I've been doing a
lot of thinking about us.

So have I.

And I know I've disappointed you,

but is it really worth throwing
away eight years together?

Yes.

Yes, it is.

What?

Jordan, maybe you
can get past all this,

but I can't.

The woman I fell in love
with, she was responsible

and considerate.

She would never do
the things you've done.

I'm still the same person.

Well, then you're not
who I thought you were.

So what are you saying?

I'm saying I don't
want to marry you anymore.

I'm saying I'd like my
grandmother's ring back.

Mom, I am not in the mood

to hear about how I've ruined my life.

Well, good, because I
didn't come to tell you that.

I came, actually, because
I thought you might need me.

I don't know what I'm gonna do.

You're gonna do exactly
what you have been doing.

It'll just be without Peter.

Claire, have you found
a new roommate yet?

The press scared everyone off,
so it's fate that you're back.

What are we going to tell everyone?

That the wedding has
been indefinitely postponed.

You don't owe anyone an explanation.

I think they'll be
able to do the math.

Yes, but you can't
keep the crystal bowls.

I love the crystal bowls.

Everything has to go back.

I had my whole life planned out.

I knew exactly what it was going to be.

I think that, deep down,

you weren't ready to marry Peter.

You said it yourself. You
got caught up in a moment.

Whenever I'm with Matt,
there's just no stress.

I can just be me and not
worry about what people think.

Sounds to me like maybe Vegas
was more than just a moment.

I don't know what I'm going to do.

I'm so confused.
Everything's just a mess.

Jordy, everything
is going to be okay.

And when the time is right,
and when the guy is right,

your life is going to
fall into place perfectly.

I hope so.

Hello?

Jordy, it's for you.

- Hello.
- We have our hearing date.

Thanks.

Since it's evident

that you were both
clearly of unsound mind

at the time of this marriage,

I'm gonna Grant you this annulment.

Marriage is an institution

that too many people
take too lightly the days.

I expect that you both
will think long and hard

before jumping into these waters again.

Your honor.

Jordan, talk to us.
Sad day. Matt dumped you.

- What are you feeling right now?
- Guys, guys.

Come on, Matt. Talk to us.

It's been a really tough day.

- What was it like in court?
- Jordan, do you have a comment?

- Why now?
- Please, no comments.

- Why such a short one?
- No comment, guys.

No comment.

Jordan, just talk to us
for a couple of seconds here.

Give us some time.
Please, guys, come on.

- Excuse me, thank you.
- What was it like?

- Matt, who dumped who?
- Matt!

No comment.

You okay?

None of this matters anymore.

Peter called off the wedding.

I'm sorry to hear that.

It's okay.

It's better to know who Peter is

before things get complicated.

Yeah, I guess.

Times have been pretty trying
for us lately, haven't they?

Do you always speak
in movie dialogue?

Sorry. Occupational hazard.

Listen, I'm going down
to San Diego this weekend,

see my parents for some
rest, home-cooked meals,

and some serious board
games with Ethel and Mike.

Would you want to join us?

Why?

Because it's fun.

It's well off the beaten
path from these guys.

Give you a chance to
decompress undisturbed.

Besides, me and my ego need a chance

to redeem ourselves from
that air hockey debacle.

As if that's possible.

I happen to know that fun
is the best medicine for you.

- What do you say?
- Okay, I'll go.

Here he is at the senior prom.

- Isn't he precious?
- Mom!

There it is, proof.

A mother loves her child no
matter how big of a dork he is.

Yeah, or how big his head gets.

You see? That's why I come home.

These two remind me of
all my awkward years,

and the insecurities come flooding back.

You were pretty cute.

And there he is,

the only year he played baseball.

Only the most
humiliating year of my life.

Yeah, well, all my
life, all I ever wanted...

- Here we go.
- Was a son who was in

the major leagues.

But my son, what does he decide to do?

Wear tights.

Yes, Michael, if only our son
had made something of himself.

Bam! He's out of there!

So, um, you know everything?

Matt and I are very close.

Then you must not
think very highly of me.

On the contrary.

I think you're the one person

that hasn't wanted
something from my son.

I have never done
anything that crazy.

I take marriage very seriously.

I believe you, Jordan.

So, what do you think of Matthew?

- I like him.
- Good.

He's funny and sarcastic...

And annoyingly famous,

but... He makes me laugh.

I think you're good for him.

We're just friends.

Just thrown together through
outrageous circumstances.

Maybe so.

But I haven't seen Matthew
look this happy with a girl

for a very long time.

It's really good.

It needs some work,

but it's just the kind of thing

that Eric would have passed
on without telling me.

I think it gives you a
chance to show what you've got.

Yeah. I'll call the studio tomorrow.

We'll see how much
Eric told me was true.

I wonder if they'd
back me on this, though.

I bet they would.

You're a ridiculously huge star.

I mean, I don't marry just anyone.

I have pretty high standards.

Is that so?

It's pretty out here, isn't it?

You want to... you wanna go in?

Um, I don't want to get my hair wet.

You don't want to get... come on.

You don't have to go underwater.

You could just, you know...

Well, I, um, don't
really know how to swim.

I never really learned.

Okay.

Would you want me to get
you some of the arm floaties?

I know that my nephew
has some around here.

That's okay. I don't need floaties.

Is this... is this like
the air hockey moment?

You're gonna tell me you
don't know how to swim,

and then you pull an olympic
medal out of your pocket?

No, really, truly, I
don't know how to swim.

Not that hard. I could show you.

In your clothes?

What, you don't think
I'll go in in my clothes?

No.

I'll... that sounds
like a dare to me.

I will show you.

I'm serious, I will do this.

Yeah!

You see? You see, I did it!

And I survived.

So you are, but you can swim.

Well, trust me.

I am feeling very, very
optimistic about your abilities.

Come on!

You're thinking too much again.

You've got to turn it off, Jordan Grady.

Turn it off and let go.

Do the thing that scares you to death.

- Drowning?
- Yeah, I should rephrase that.

I promise you, I won't let you drown.

You can do it.

- Are you okay?
- Yeah.

- You did it.
- You told me to let go.

You took a chance and you survived.

Good night.

So I love your parents.

- They're a bit much at times.
- They're very sweet.

Well, I hope my mom with her photos

didn't go overboard.

I loved the photos.

- And my dad.
- He's kooky.

He's more than kooky.

Trust me, he was on his
best behavior that weekend.

I wish he would heat the pool.

Yeah, he gets a little cheap.

So... Do you want to come in?

Yeah, I'd love to, but
I've got a ton of meetings.

Call you soon?

Thank you for this weekend...

For everything.

It was nice.

- Yeah?
- Matthew.

Eric, why are you calling me?

We had a disagreement.

It's not the first time

I had a knockdown drag-out
with one of my clients.

Happens in all relationships,

so now we dust ourselves
off and we move forward.

Yeah, well, I've got
different ideas for my career,

and I'm sorry, you don't
fit in the picture anymore.

Buddy, come on, we had
six great years together.

Eric, it's done.

I'm going with Cathy Riley at cbk.

You still have one year
left on your contract with me.

Let's do this civilized.

When you mess with my livelihood,

we are way beyond civilized.

I'm so happy I have you back.

It's kind of like I was never gone.

Yeah, well, some of your stuff was,

and I really missed it.

Help me put it away,

and maybe it will never leave you again.

You know how I am.

I can't rest until it's all done.

Okay, well, I'm only helping you

because you're going
back to work tomorrow,

not because you're an ocd freak.

It's Eric Spencer, Matt's agent.

Hello, Mr. Spencer?

Jordan, I have some information

about your precious Matt that
you might find interesting.

He just might not be the
catch you think he is.

Does that pique your interest, sweetie?

Hey.

- What's the matter?
- Eric called me.

I see.

You told him to wait
until the vie opened

- to start the annulment?
- Look, Jordan...

Why would you use me like that?

Look, I never should
have gone along with it.

It was stupid and
insensitive, and I'm sorry.

So I'm just supposed to
make all of this okay for you.

No, no, that's not what I'm asking.

Jordan, just let me say this.

Ever since the weekend at my parents',

I can't stop thinking about you.

You're amazing, beautiful,

and just knowing you has made me realize

how cheap my little Matt
Swift world has become.

I will do anything and everything I can

to make this up to you.

That's a great performance, Matt.

- Jordan, please...
- please leave.

- No.
- Just go.

- Go.
- Come on.

Leave.

Thank you, Sarah.

The nisslers are getting restless.

They want to know why
escrow's taking so long.

The mortgage company has
to do their due diligence,

and they don't have the
greatest credit in the world,

so they're gonna need to be patient.

Are you gonna answer that?

No. I know who it is.

It's not important.

- Are you okay?
- Yes, I really am.

And I know the nisslers
are good friends of yours,

so please tell them

that I am going to get
them their dream house.

- I promise.
- I will.

I know you've been through a lot,

but I just need you to
keep your head in the game.

- Okay?
- I will.

- I promise to focus.
- All right.

Hello, it's Jordan Grady.
Please leave a message.

Jordan, it's me, Matt.

I'm trying to reach you. I'm sorry.

Please talk to me?

- Great yard.
- Yeah.

The thing I like about this house

is the breakfast nook.
Come on and check it out.

Jordan, please, come on.
I'm trying to talk to you.

Would you...

all right, I'll call
you at home tonight.

Mom.

How you holding up?

- Today was my wedding day.
- I know.

That's why I'm here. Are you okay?

I guess so.

Aren't you going to answer that?

No, it's him again.

Wow, a celebrity stalking a civilian.

Now that's a first.

So maybe you should
hear what he has to say.

Why? What's the point?

Because, you said
yourself, he's a good person.

What he did was wrong, but
he's trying to apologize.

You know firsthand how that feels.

He used me for his career.

Did he?

People do things that
they regret all the time,

don't they, Jordan?

You think about that.

You want some tea?
I'll make you some tea.

Hey, Jordan.

It's me, Matt, calling again.

I know you're home
and you can hear this,

because... Well, I'm standing
outside of your place right now.

Look, I let myself be manipulated,

and I let other people call the shots,

and I am the biggest jerk ever.

I did that thing. I
listened to my manager

and my press, and I believed it.

And, I don't know, I thought
I had it all figured out.

But then I met... You.

And you were so real and honest,

not to mention funny,

and you never asked for anything.

And for once...

I felt like I could let someone in.

So I want to thank you

for letting me be me.

Look, I... I know you're furious,

and I'm gonna stop bothering you,

so I will... Count to five,

and if you don't answer it by then,

I... I guess I'll just
never call you again.

Okay?

So... So here goes.

One,

two,

three,

four...

Come on, Jordan.

Five.

Looks like he's not done trying.

I have more for you.
I'll be right back.

Thanks.

He's always gotten
everything he ever wanted.

People trip over themselves
to give him what he wants.

He's just feeling sorry for himself.

It's from Chris.

Matt got Chris' movie sold.

He's doing the movie. Good for him.

Great, I finally
meet this amazing man,

and he sendsyouflowers.

Here you go, ladies.

Have a good day.

Thanks.

Must've been some script.

They're for me.

"Every single part of
my life is because of you.

Love, Chris".

I stand corrected.

Matt, how does it feel

to be back in the $100 million club

Rookie cop?

It feels... Cheap.

The movie is so embarrassingly bad,

it should be a crime to
charge the public to see it.

That's how it feels.

Wow, well, it...

It's still in the theater.

You're messing with my box office,

you stupid, ungrateful actor.

You have so many fans.

Do you really think
it's a crime for them

to support one of your films?

No, let me be clear,
I support my fans,

and I appreciate them
coming out to see my work,

but this particular
project... Be forewarned.

Okay, well... Let's get personal

and talk about your secret wedding.

What possessed you to run
off and go get hitched?

You've been linked
to so many a-list leading ladies.

What was special and
different about this girl

that made you want to settle down?

We're calling in sick.

Well, I know everyone's
looking for some dramatic story,

but it wasn't that. It was... A moment.

And I don't regret it for a second,

because I met the most
amazing woman I've ever known.

She's really the only
person outside of my family

that knows me,

not the Matt Swift
that publicists created.

She's funny and adoringly charming,

and... Just sweet.

How difficult is it

to be in a relationship
in the public eye?

That's a good question.

Um... Look, I know my life
has been incredibly charmed,

but being a celebrity isn't always easy.

Being the wife of one is even harder,

and just knowing me

has caused her a great deal of harm.

I'll always be indebted to
her for being real with me

and inspiring me...

And just listening to
me 'cause she wanted to.

Look, Holly, I live my
life with no regrets,

but I have caused her
a great deal of pain,

and, for that, I... Do have regrets,

and let's just say
I'm truly, truly sorry.

Very insightful.

More with my revealing
interview with Matt Swift

coming up after the break.

He's so in love with you.

- Do you think so?
- Did you not just see that?

Okay, I've got to think.

Call him.

I'm gonna call him. Yeah.

Okay, yeah, I'm gonna call
him. I'm gonna call him.

Right, okay, I don't know his number.

You don't have his number?

No, no, he always called me.

I've never called him.

What about all the
messages he's left you?

I erased them.

- Call his manager!
- He fired him.

Um, um, he'll call again.

No, no, no, because
he counted to five

and I didn't pick up.

He's never gonna call again,

because I didn't pick up
when he counted to five.

I completely ruined it. I've blown it.

No, you know where he
works! Go to the studio.

I'm gonna go to the studio!

I've been there! They like me.

I'm gonna go to the studio,
I'm gonna take a risk,

I'm just gonna dive in
face first, so to speak.

I'm gonna do that. Okay, okay.

- Jordy!
- What? I'm going to the studio.

- Put some clothes on first.
- Yeah. Right.

Yes, okay. Jacket.

I found one. Okay, I'm gonna go,

I'm gonna go to the studio.

- All right, bye.
- Bye!

She's in her pajamas. Boy.

Hey, I'm here to see Matt.

- Name, please.
- Jordan Grady.

I'm Matt Swift's wife.

Yeah, Matt doesn't have a wife.

Okay? And no one gets on
the lot without a drive-on.

You don't remember me?
You've let me on the lot before.

- Was your name on the list?
- Yes.

Well, is it on the list now?

- No, but he's...
- okay.

No one gets on the
lot without a drive-on.

Please, sir, have a heart.

My future happiness depends
on me getting on this lot.

My future employment
depends on this list,

so turn it around.

Jordan Grady, you
could spend the entire day

sitting outside the studio,

just hoping he comes out the gate,

or you could go get him.

I am always sneaking into places

and breaking rules for this guy.

He is worth it.

He's a movie star, and he's amazing,

and he loves you.

Okay, I'm going in.

- I'm in.
- Okay.

Well, just... just keep
talking to me, okay?

But... but talk like you belong there,

like you're doing a big
movie deal or something.

And of course, um,

casting is a major stipulation
in the green light process.

"green light process,"

really good movie term usage.

I think I've been spotted.

Hey!

Hey, you! Come back here!

We have a 415 in front of stage two.

A young woman in weird
pants and a weirder top.

I'm en route!

Okay, I am being chased

by a studio rent-a-cop
in a golf cart.

I don't believe this.

You... you are... you
are likethe fugitive.

You are Harrison Ford!

Hey, watch out.

Move it back. Let's go.

I'm almost to Matt's trailer.

Um...

Hello? Matt?

Matt!

Hold it.

Don't move.

I think I better go. I'll
call you from jail, okay?

Jail? Hel... you're kidding, right?

Hello? Hello?

Kerry, kerry, please help
me. Um, can you get Matt?

I'm sorry, Jordan. He left more than

half an hour ago.

No, no. He... he can't be gone.

Let me call him.

Okay, let's not go crazy here, guys.

Hello?

Studio security is not a joke.

It is here for the visitors

and the employees and their safety.

Point taken.

There's no need to bring
the real police into this.

Not that you're not
real law enforcement,

because you so are.

Just hold on... Matt will
clear this whole thing up.

Wait... just wait. Just wait, okay?

That hurts a little bit.

Six days on one, and then I did...

Matt!

Jor... Jordan?

Henry, what's going on?

Well, Mr. Swift, she was trespassing

on private property.

I'm sorry.

Henry, she's on the list.
She's on the permanent list.

You're just doing your
job. I appreciate it.

Maybe next time, you just
call me and double check.

- Yes, sir. Will do, sir.
- All right.

Sorry. Henry!

The cuffs?

- Right, sir.
- Wow.

What are you... are you in your pajamas?

It's a blazer and my
pajamas and other stuff.

It's a... I've never done
anything that crazy before.

I happen to know that's not the case.

Jordan, why are you here?

- I saw the interview.
- Yeah?

- And...
- and...

I want to be with you too.

Look, this world gets really crazy.

Are you sure?

You have to earn my trust back.

I'm gonna make it up to you.

Even if it takes forever.

It's kind of funny how
we did things backwards.

First, marriage, then dating.

Yeah, it's like our souls
connected before we did.

There's that movie dialogue again.

I know. The writers are

so much more eloquent than me.

I actually think
they're pretty cheesy.

If you don't kiss me by
the time I count to five...

One...

- I wrote that.
- Two...

4 3/4...

4 11/27...

Come on.

Congratulations!