Original subtitles

What did you say?

Gosh, Rick, I'm so happy we hit it off tonight.

I really, really like you.

Yeah. This just feels really real,

you know?

Promise you're not gonna murder me or anything, right?

Yes. Or I mean, no,

I, I definitely haven't killed anyone.

And if I had- - Oh?

It was an accident.

You've got a dangerous sense of humor.

Oh, scary.

Oh.

Oh, sh...

I got an eyelash in my eye. Sorry.

Lemme just-

Oh, can I take a look?

Hmm.

All I see are two pretty eyes

and one beautiful soul.

- Oh. - Sorry.

Let me just check this in my mirror, in my mirror.

Just hold that thought.

Oh, great job.

Where is it?

Okay.

Easy does it.

Ow.

When the?

What the?

Oh God.

Not this again.

Okay.

Ah!

Hey, everything's fine.

Just grabbing some tape.

I'll only be a minute.

- Do you need any help? - Nah, I'm, I'm good.

Uh, just stay put.

I mean it.

Phew.

Alright, everything is going so well.

We had nice dinner.

Except flies.

Now all you have to do is just stay calm!

Ah!

Yes.

Agh.

Agh!

Just die!

Get out of my face!

Ooh, jackpot.

Agh.

Okay.

This will fix the flies.

Hmm.

Three...

Two...

One...

Oh my god!

Oh Rick, I thought I was gonna lose you.

I'm so sorry about tonight,

but you know, it's all taken care of

and now we can be together

just you and me,

every day.

Forever, baby!

Now, where were we?

Computer engineering degree?

- Yeah. - Hmm.

Experience both hardware and software.

Five years senior systems admin

then not a.

For the last year and a half gambling,

sex maniac. - No.

Six figure salary and a 401k

just wasn't exciting enough?

Thank you again for the opportunity.

Come on.

You're there. - Yeah.

Now Matty gave you a rundown of the system.

No?

The moderator queue is pre-programmed by the algorithm.

Don't skip around. - Got it.

And look, I know HR gave you the whole spiel.

They'll give you as many therapist quacks as you want.

Mental health days. Not that they helped your predecessor.

Seriously.

None of those are ever gonna take away

the utter heinous shit you are about to see.

Guys come in here, they think they're tough

'cause they've seen some gore on Reddit.

This is different.

There's your life now

and there's your life after you log into that machine.

- Understood. - Okay, I'm out.

You have my number.

Don't call.

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Hi everyone!

Welcome to another episode of the Betty Show.

I am your host, Betty!

Today's special guest comes to us all the way from,

well, you know, I can't tell you that,

it's Bert.

Say Hi, Bert!

Bert, come on, wake up.

Bert's a little grumpy today.

I can cheer him up though!

Let me show you.

Oh, Bert, come here.

Hey man, I know it's late

but I wanted to give you a call

and congratulate you on the new job!

Hey, listen man,

I know it's been a rough year, but I'm proud of you.

We pretend it's us versus them.

Pure.

Depraved.

But we all turn our heads at the sight of a car crash.

Of adrenaline,

the rush.

Someone else's misery.

You no longer have to drive down the interstate

or inject it straight into your eyeballs until the barrier,

that invisible barrier we all think exists is gone.

It's no mistake you're here.

Embrace it.

You can try and lift yourself out.

Fill that little void in your chest.

It always sucks back in.

And believe me, I was scared at first too

of people from the videos

all around me.

But look at us now,

all together

as one.

I know you're gonna try and fight it,

but the door's already open

and I can't wait for you to join us.

Help me.

Help me.

She's coming.

Bert?

Down!

Hey Rick?

Yeah. This job isn't for me.

I'm gonna put my notice in now.

You can send my check, or you know,

if you want me to pick it up, I can...

Oh, you keep it.

Yeah. You know.

I'll pick, yeah.

Wanted to thank you again for the oppor...

For the oppor...