Original subtitles

- Mom, I'm makin' burgers.

Meat.

- Well, hello there, Children.

Gather around.

Gather around.

It's time for today's lesson, Children

- Who are you? - Don't be silly.

It's your old pal, Meat Friend.

Can you say hello? - Hello, Meat Friend.

Hello, Children.

Today, we have a very important lesson,

How to Make a Prison Shiv.

- What's a prison shiv? - It's what we do

with snitches, Children. - Snitches?

Mm-hm, anybody who don't keep

their mouth shut.

Don't be a snitch, Children. - It's Billie.

Okay, settle down, Children.

First, find something shaped like a stick,

like a toothbrush or pen.

Next, make it sharp enough to send snitches to oblivion.

- What's oblivion? - Well, I'll show you,

Children. - What on earth are

you doing? - Mom, my hamburger can talk.

Oh, that's nice.

Oh my God, what did you do?

You can't microwave hamburger meat.

Let me cook it for you next time, okay?

No, you killed him.

You killed him. - What?

Who? - Meat Friend.

Oh, Billie,

stop that. - No, Meat Friend is real.

You don't throw away friends, Mom.

You're right.

Just deadbeat husbands.

Hello, Children.

I must have passed out. - Well, you did take

a little nap. - Oh, really?

Now, how did that happen? - Mom threw you in

the garbage.

Sorry.

- Anyway, did you know that

today is Meat Day?

Happy Meat Day, Children?

Happy Meat Day, Meat Friend.

- So, prove it to me. - How?

- Let's have a party. - Yeah.

Yeah.

Snack time. - Yay, snack.

USA, USA, USA.

Mom, I hate this cream cheese.

Hold on a second.

What now? - Mom, this cream cheese

sucks.

More beef, less cheese. - What has gotten into you?

What is the sudden obsession with meat?

I said more beef,

less cheese.

Beef?

Beef.

Beef.

I'm gonna call you back.

- Well, hello there, Children.

- It's just me, Billie. - Hush, now, Children.

You seen a bunny around here?

It owes me money. - Meat Friend, you're weird.

Hey, fuck you, Children.

Okay, today we're gonna learn about loan sharking.

I'm talkin' about when bitches owe you money.

Well, guess what?

Bitch is gonna pay.

Ooh, an Easter egg.

Ew, Easter Bunny's mean. - No, Children.

That is the Easter Bunny.

Lesson two, eat your enemies for breakfast.

- But it's afternoon. - Do it.

Eat the bunny.

He will taste of lies. - Okay, I've never had

lies before.

Now you are men, Children.

Oh.

- Hey, Children.

Now that you're feeling better,

it's time for today's lesson.

- Yay, what is it? - How to make it look

like an accident. - What do you mean?

Just what I said, Children.

- It's Billie. - Children, an accident

is what happens when you need someone or something

to go away sooner than later.

Tell me you understand, Children.

I understand.

Okay, then.

Once upon a time,

I had a friend.

This friend, he lost my money, a lot of money.

He had to go away to pay for that; hence, an accident.

Ah.

The thing about accidents

is that no one gets in trouble but the trouble goes away.

Wow, how do you make an accident?

Lots of different ways.

Has anyone ever asked you to be creative?

Yep, in art class, we made turkeys by tracing our hands.

This is different.

You can make an accident creative with

a shiv in the face,

a tarantula in the cereal box,

fire in bed,

drowning in a tub full

of pudding. - But Meat Friend,

those don't seem like accidents.

- Like I said, accidents. - Meat Friend, I don't think

you know what accidents mean. - 8:00 is, Children.

What happened to birdie?

- Looks like an accident. - An accident?

You killed birdie. - Sometimes these things

happen, Children, and sometimes, they're delicious.

- You're delicious - Children, no.

I'm not Children.

My name is Billie. - You were

the chosen one. - And you were an accident.

No, no.

Beef?

- Hey, yesterday,

you couldn't stop talking about cheesy beef,

and now this?

You just wait until your Uncle Steve gets here.

Do you know what we do with snitches?

♪ For no real reason, I was chopped in the head ♪

♪ A psycho with an ax left me for dead ♪

♪ Ooh doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo doo ♪

♪ And I'm being eaten by the undead ♪

♪ Are some, they's fast are they slow ♪

♪ Who the hell knows? ♪

♪ Ooh, doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo doo doo ♪

♪ A demon obsessed me, and now I'm fucked ♪

♪ I guess that old priest really sucked ♪

♪ Duh duh duh ♪

♪ Duh duh duh ♪

♪ Duh duh duh ♪

♪ Duh duh duh ♪

♪ Die, die, we're all gonna die ♪

♪ We might just well go in style ♪

♪ Oh, why, why, we all have to die ♪

♪ No one really cares ♪

♪ I get killed by ♪

♪ A creepy kid. ♪

♪ Not really sure what he did ♪

♪ To me, ah, dah, dah ♪

♪ Uh duh, duh ♪

♪ Dah dah dah ♪

♪ A creature in the forest ♪

♪ Overtook me ♪

♪ To bad, the one that filmed me ♪

♪ Was a rookie ♪

♪ Ooh, doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo doo doo ♪ - My head.

♪ My body's controlled by an alien species ♪

♪ I can't control my arm ♪

♪ It's cutting me to pieces ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Die, die, we all will die ♪

♪ We might as well ♪

♪ Go in style ♪

♪ Oh, why, why, we all have to die ♪

♪ No one really cares ♪

♪ Oh, die, die ♪

♪ We're all gonna die ♪

♪ We might as well go in style ♪

♪ Oh, why, why, we all have to die ♪

♪ And no one really cares ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo doo doo ♪

- Dr. Wallenheimer. - That thing, he had me

and his

- Okay.

Okay.

♪ When you wish ♪

♪ Upon a star ♪

♪ Doesn't matter ♪

♪ Who you are ♪

- Whoa.

- Wow.

Holy fuck.

No, no, no, no, no, no, (foreign words).

Runar?