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1
00:00:18,410 --> 00:00:19,551
America...
2
00:00:19,628 --> 00:00:21,002
you've seen me every week.
3
00:00:21,080 --> 00:00:23,096
You know how much
I do for those kids.
4
00:00:23,173 --> 00:00:24,581
Bernie Mac is a giver,
5
00:00:24,658 --> 00:00:27,350
and those kids ain't
nothing but takers.
6
00:00:27,427 --> 00:00:30,937
Over these last few months,
these kids have committed acts
7
00:00:31,014 --> 00:00:32,648
that was unspeakable.
8
00:00:32,724 --> 00:00:36,401
Stopped up my toilets, scratched
my album and dented my car,
9
00:00:36,478 --> 00:00:39,112
but now they've gone
one step beyond.
10
00:00:39,189 --> 00:00:42,574
They've done the unthinkable.
11
00:00:42,651 --> 00:00:45,085
They ate my chicken.
12
00:00:46,121 --> 00:00:48,672
Who ate my chicken?!
13
00:00:48,749 --> 00:00:49,840
I got one rule
14
00:00:49,917 --> 00:00:51,917
when I come from a gig,
and what is it?
15
00:00:51,993 --> 00:00:53,377
How'd your gig go?
16
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:54,669
Don't ask me
nothin' stupid, Jordan.
17
00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:55,854
Sorry.
18
00:00:55,931 --> 00:00:57,413
Yeah, you are sorry.
19
00:00:57,491 --> 00:00:59,299
-(phone rings)
-You're probably sorry
'cause you ate my chicken.
20
00:00:59,310 --> 00:01:00,759
Matter of fact,
you open your mouth.
21
00:01:00,836 --> 00:01:02,385
Let me smell
your breath.
22
00:01:02,462 --> 00:01:03,386
-Bernie!
-Come here.
23
00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:05,138
Hey, take a message, baby!
24
00:01:05,215 --> 00:01:06,890
I'm getting ready
to expose a criminal.
Open your mouth.
25
00:01:06,967 --> 00:01:07,891
-You crazy.
-Yeah, I'm crazy
26
00:01:07,968 --> 00:01:08,975
when somebody
eats my chicken.
27
00:01:09,052 --> 00:01:10,218
Baby, please listen.
28
00:01:10,295 --> 00:01:11,144
I'm conducting
an investigation.
29
00:01:11,221 --> 00:01:12,813
It was D from Chicago.
30
00:01:12,889 --> 00:01:14,406
Your Uncle Elister
passed away.
31
00:01:22,816 --> 00:01:23,990
How?
32
00:01:24,067 --> 00:01:26,868
In his sleep last night.
33
00:01:26,945 --> 00:01:29,421
Honey, I'm so sorry.
34
00:01:33,118 --> 00:01:35,210
My Uncle Elister
was very special.
35
00:01:35,287 --> 00:01:37,587
Well, he wasn't actually
my blood uncle,
36
00:01:37,664 --> 00:01:40,132
but he lived across
the street from us
37
00:01:40,208 --> 00:01:41,766
when I was growing up.
38
00:01:41,477 --> 00:01:43,718
He practically
raised me, you know.
39
00:01:43,795 --> 00:01:46,304
I remember my Uncle Elister
bought my first bike.
40
00:01:46,381 --> 00:01:47,597
He taught me how to ride.
41
00:01:47,674 --> 00:01:49,432
He picked me up
when I fell off of it,
42
00:01:49,509 --> 00:01:51,568
and he comforted me
when someone stole it.
43
00:01:52,813 --> 00:01:55,188
Baby, I'm going to
44
00:01:55,265 --> 00:01:59,317
have to go to Chicago
and pay my respects.
45
00:01:59,328 --> 00:02:00,902
Baby, we'll all go.
46
00:02:00,979 --> 00:02:02,070
I know.
47
00:02:02,147 --> 00:02:04,030
We're going
to Chicago?
48
00:02:04,107 --> 00:02:05,907
Can we see our mom?
49
00:02:05,984 --> 00:02:07,226
Oh, Nessa, please.
50
00:02:07,302 --> 00:02:09,661
Of course
you can see your mom.
51
00:02:09,738 --> 00:02:11,788
Without a doubt.
52
00:02:11,865 --> 00:02:14,383
It's time for family.
53
00:02:22,417 --> 00:02:23,592
You know what, Wanda?
54
00:02:23,668 --> 00:02:26,136
I never got a chance
to really thank him
55
00:02:26,213 --> 00:02:28,346
for supporting me
and believing in me.
56
00:02:28,423 --> 00:02:31,183
I never, ever, ever got
a chance to thank him.
57
00:02:31,259 --> 00:02:34,644
Baby, I think he knows
how much you care.
58
00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:35,812
Aunt Wanda.
59
00:02:35,889 --> 00:02:37,898
Have you seen my pirate cape?
60
00:02:37,974 --> 00:02:40,659
Honey, I'll help
you pack.
61
00:02:44,731 --> 00:02:46,531
Know what, Jordan?
62
00:02:46,608 --> 00:02:48,792
Don't be like
your Uncle Bernie
63
00:02:48,869 --> 00:02:50,376
and wait till somebody dies
64
00:02:50,454 --> 00:02:52,996
before you get a chance
to tell them you love them.
65
00:02:53,073 --> 00:02:55,165
Mm-mm. No way.
66
00:02:55,242 --> 00:02:56,675
Don't be like me.
67
00:02:58,245 --> 00:02:59,878
Uncle Bernie, I...
68
00:02:59,955 --> 00:03:01,838
I...
69
00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:03,807
I ate your chicken.
70
00:03:07,921 --> 00:03:09,346
Jordan...
71
00:03:09,422 --> 00:03:10,814
don't worry about it.
72
00:03:13,819 --> 00:03:17,354
(jet engine roars)
73
00:03:17,430 --> 00:03:20,982
BERNIE MAC:
Look at that champagne.
74
00:03:21,059 --> 00:03:23,068
Bernie Mac in coach.
75
00:03:23,144 --> 00:03:25,454
You doggone
kids.
76
00:03:26,564 --> 00:03:27,697
Yeah, right
back at you.
77
00:03:27,774 --> 00:03:30,200
Hey! Turn around!
78
00:03:30,277 --> 00:03:31,910
Leave my Uncle Bernie
alone!
79
00:03:31,987 --> 00:03:33,119
He's 'motional.
80
00:03:33,196 --> 00:03:34,204
Yeah, 'motional.
81
00:03:34,281 --> 00:03:36,456
This is our first
trip as a family.
82
00:03:36,467 --> 00:03:38,467
Can I go sit
by the window?
83
00:03:39,869 --> 00:03:41,845
Go ahead.
84
00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:45,674
(grunting)
85
00:03:45,750 --> 00:03:48,685
♪♪
86
00:03:56,303 --> 00:03:59,404
♪♪
87
00:04:03,143 --> 00:04:04,743
Ow!
88
00:04:15,256 --> 00:04:18,081
Oh, ma'am, ma'am,
ma'am, miss.
89
00:04:18,158 --> 00:04:21,677
I'm ready for my meal right now.
90
00:04:24,715 --> 00:04:27,766
(retching)
91
00:04:32,339 --> 00:04:36,275
(retching)
92
00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:44,950
(grunting)
93
00:04:59,157 --> 00:05:01,791
(both grunting)
94
00:05:01,802 --> 00:05:04,919
PILOT: On behalf of thecrew, I would like towelcome everyone
95
00:05:04,930 --> 00:05:06,796
to Chicago O'Hare airport.
96
00:05:06,873 --> 00:05:09,182
Oh, yeah. Chicago.
97
00:05:09,259 --> 00:05:11,426
I'm home, baby.
98
00:05:11,503 --> 00:05:14,137
PILOT: There appears to betraffic at the gate,
99
00:05:14,214 --> 00:05:16,473
so unfortunately, we're gonnahave to sit still here
100
00:05:16,549 --> 00:05:18,650
for about 45 minutesto an hour and a half.
101
00:05:20,404 --> 00:05:22,896
Please have some peanuts,complimentary on us.
102
00:05:22,972 --> 00:05:24,823
Oh.
103
00:05:41,449 --> 00:05:43,958
Oh, goodness.
104
00:05:44,035 --> 00:05:46,178
Hi, baby.
105
00:05:46,254 --> 00:05:48,421
Beanie.
106
00:05:48,498 --> 00:05:51,049
Hey, Mama Liva.
107
00:05:51,060 --> 00:05:54,969
Oh, come on
in here, boy.
108
00:05:55,046 --> 00:05:56,730
You look good.
109
00:06:00,135 --> 00:06:01,851
Oh, Beanie,
110
00:06:01,928 --> 00:06:05,772
your uncle would have
been so glad you came.
111
00:06:05,849 --> 00:06:08,400
Oh, Mama Liva,
you kidding, man?
112
00:06:08,476 --> 00:06:09,734
Y'all my family.
113
00:06:09,811 --> 00:06:11,861
Shoot, I'd have walked here.
114
00:06:11,938 --> 00:06:13,071
(chuckles)
115
00:06:13,148 --> 00:06:15,073
Bernie Bern Bern.
116
00:06:15,150 --> 00:06:16,699
Hey, what's up, D?
117
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:18,067
-What's up, big brother?
-What's up, man?
118
00:06:18,145 --> 00:06:19,577
Man, sorry I couldn't
get here earlier.
119
00:06:19,654 --> 00:06:20,695
Oh, that ain't nothing.
120
00:06:20,772 --> 00:06:22,046
You know how it is
working for the man.
121
00:06:22,124 --> 00:06:23,415
I mean, the supervisor
want a brother
122
00:06:23,491 --> 00:06:25,116
to work the whole
9:00 to 5:00, man.
123
00:06:24,760 --> 00:06:29,304
Hey, D, I'm truly sorry
about your dad, man, really.
124
00:06:29,381 --> 00:06:30,655
It's heavy.
125
00:06:30,732 --> 00:06:33,433
I can still smell him
on his coat.
126
00:06:38,047 --> 00:06:40,014
Hey, how'd they let you on
the plane with that weapon?
127
00:06:40,091 --> 00:06:41,808
I ain't got no weapon.
What you talking about, D?
128
00:06:41,885 --> 00:06:44,936
Wanda, man.
She's like a fine
bomb, boom!
129
00:06:45,013 --> 00:06:46,354
Hi, D.
130
00:06:46,431 --> 00:06:47,606
Hey, Wanda.
131
00:06:47,682 --> 00:06:49,515
Hey, kids.
Look at these kids.
132
00:06:49,592 --> 00:06:52,402
Last time I saw y'all,
I was bringing that
couch over to y'all's house.
133
00:06:52,479 --> 00:06:53,603
Remember when
I was bringing that couch
134
00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:55,330
over to y'all's
house?
135
00:06:55,407 --> 00:06:57,407
Man, them kids
love me, Bernie.
136
00:06:57,484 --> 00:06:58,616
Yeah, I see.
137
00:06:58,693 --> 00:07:00,961
Everybody loves you, D.
138
00:07:02,238 --> 00:07:03,997
BOTH:
Named it Earl.
139
00:07:04,073 --> 00:07:07,000
(laughing)
140
00:07:07,076 --> 00:07:09,177
Oh, he was
a good man.
141
00:07:10,872 --> 00:07:13,465
He really loved
you boys.
142
00:07:13,541 --> 00:07:15,091
I know, Mama.
143
00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:16,642
Hey, listen,
you kids,
144
00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:19,220
why don't you all
go in the front
and watch television
145
00:07:19,297 --> 00:07:21,431
while us grown folks
sit here and talk
a little while, okay?
146
00:07:21,508 --> 00:07:22,807
Go ahead,
go ahead.
147
00:07:22,884 --> 00:07:24,458
Okay.
148
00:07:24,536 --> 00:07:28,229
And if you lose the picture,
just jiggle the hanger.
149
00:07:28,306 --> 00:07:31,274
And we only get
channel two.
150
00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:33,234
Mama Liva,
151
00:07:33,311 --> 00:07:36,112
why don't you let us take care
of the funeral arrangement?
152
00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:38,990
I mean, it would
do my heart
real good, please.
153
00:07:39,067 --> 00:07:40,783
Oh, no, no.
154
00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:44,412
You're such an angel,
but D's taking care
of everything.
155
00:07:44,489 --> 00:07:47,207
That's right; it's going
to be beautiful, Mama.
156
00:07:47,283 --> 00:07:48,291
I know it is.
157
00:07:48,368 --> 00:07:49,834
Let me help you.
158
00:07:49,911 --> 00:07:53,847
Bernie, let me put this
bug in your ear over here.
159
00:07:59,170 --> 00:08:00,270
Hey, um,
160
00:08:00,347 --> 00:08:02,204
now I'm going to handle
everything, right,
161
00:08:02,282 --> 00:08:03,515
but I'm still waiting
for Daddy's check from
the government, man.
162
00:08:03,591 --> 00:08:05,400
You know how slow
they can be.
163
00:08:05,477 --> 00:08:06,851
Hey, maybe you don't
remember, you know.
164
00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:08,520
You're big time and
everything now, but,
165
00:08:08,596 --> 00:08:10,230
could you float me
for a minute, man?
166
00:08:10,306 --> 00:08:11,448
He did not just say that.
167
00:08:11,525 --> 00:08:14,526
He did not
just ask me for money.
168
00:08:14,602 --> 00:08:16,694
Oh... D!
169
00:08:16,771 --> 00:08:19,197
Had to ruin everything.
170
00:08:19,274 --> 00:08:20,698
America, I know we all got
171
00:08:20,775 --> 00:08:23,576
somebody in our family
just like this, too.
172
00:08:23,587 --> 00:08:26,829
And if you don't think so,
then it's you.
173
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:30,166
D, why don't we go down in
the morning and take care of it.
174
00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:31,876
You my dog, man.
175
00:08:31,953 --> 00:08:33,044
Yeah.
176
00:08:33,121 --> 00:08:34,971
And, hey, you already
offered anyway, right?
177
00:08:35,957 --> 00:08:37,933
Mama, I get that,
I get that.
178
00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:42,387
Now this is one
of our best sellers.
179
00:08:42,463 --> 00:08:43,888
White oak.
180
00:08:43,965 --> 00:08:45,765
Very nice,
very understated.
181
00:08:45,776 --> 00:08:47,350
No, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
182
00:08:47,427 --> 00:08:48,560
Mm-mm, no.
183
00:08:48,636 --> 00:08:49,677
What's wrong, D?
184
00:08:49,755 --> 00:08:51,028
Come on, Bernie,
this looks like
185
00:08:51,106 --> 00:08:52,438
somebody's shop
class project.
186
00:08:52,515 --> 00:08:54,357
Thing can't cost more
than $200, man.
187
00:08:54,434 --> 00:08:56,901
Well, well, what
do you suggest, D?
188
00:08:56,978 --> 00:08:58,861
Bernie, when Biggie died...
189
00:08:58,938 --> 00:08:59,862
R.I.P.
190
00:08:59,939 --> 00:09:01,698
they put the brother
in a gold coffin
191
00:09:01,774 --> 00:09:03,741
lined with
velvet.
192
00:09:03,818 --> 00:09:05,535
It had his initials
in diamonds on
the top of it.
193
00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:06,828
I know this man ain't
trying to tell me
194
00:09:06,904 --> 00:09:08,171
my daddy ain't
as good as Biggie.
195
00:09:08,248 --> 00:09:09,205
We do special
requests,
196
00:09:09,282 --> 00:09:10,590
but it can get
a bit expensive.
197
00:09:10,667 --> 00:09:12,384
Hey, man, hey.
198
00:09:12,460 --> 00:09:14,127
My father died.
199
00:09:14,203 --> 00:09:17,180
Now I know we ain't up in here
trying to pinch pennies.
200
00:09:17,257 --> 00:09:18,906
Ain't that right, Bern?
201
00:09:18,984 --> 00:09:23,219
Um... I mean, let's just hear
what the man got to say, D.
202
00:09:23,296 --> 00:09:24,654
Let's just walk around
203
00:09:24,398 --> 00:09:26,398
see if we can pick out
something more proper.
204
00:09:26,474 --> 00:09:27,599
Okay, you're right.
You're right.
205
00:09:27,675 --> 00:09:29,809
Maybe something
like solid teak?
206
00:09:29,886 --> 00:09:31,069
Ebony wood,
something like that?
207
00:09:31,146 --> 00:09:33,029
I think my daddy's
worth it, right?
208
00:09:34,390 --> 00:09:36,774
This is expensive.
209
00:09:36,851 --> 00:09:39,869
And it don't even move.
210
00:09:39,946 --> 00:09:43,039
What is that?
Rustproof.
211
00:09:45,693 --> 00:09:46,960
Air con...
212
00:09:49,197 --> 00:09:50,422
This is some...
213
00:09:50,498 --> 00:09:51,664
Let's move on.
214
00:09:51,675 --> 00:09:53,015
Thanks, cuz.
215
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,584
I think we really did
right by Daddy back there.
216
00:09:54,661 --> 00:09:56,303
Yeah, Mama Liva
will be proud.
217
00:09:59,457 --> 00:10:01,850
Come on, I want
to show you something.
218
00:10:17,183 --> 00:10:21,319
Wow, look at this D.
219
00:10:21,396 --> 00:10:23,988
-16 years, man, up here.
-Mm-hmm.
220
00:10:24,065 --> 00:10:27,208
I've got some fond memories.
221
00:10:27,285 --> 00:10:29,210
We didn't have much.
222
00:10:29,287 --> 00:10:32,672
Big Mama said living
over the church may have
brought us closer to God.
223
00:10:35,702 --> 00:10:37,719
Wow, man, look at this.
224
00:10:39,839 --> 00:10:41,673
This is what Big Mama
used to measure us, man.
225
00:10:41,749 --> 00:10:45,677
Look, there was me, Stacy,
Darrell...
226
00:10:45,753 --> 00:10:48,096
Aw, look at this spurt.
227
00:10:48,172 --> 00:10:49,639
We couldn't even
afford any slacks.
228
00:10:49,716 --> 00:10:51,365
(laughing)
229
00:10:51,442 --> 00:10:53,476
I know you walked
around for about a year
wearing those floods.
230
00:10:53,553 --> 00:10:55,311
Yeah, man, ya'll was cold.
231
00:10:55,388 --> 00:10:57,021
You all used to call me uh...
(snaps fingers)
232
00:10:57,098 --> 00:11:00,149
-Oh, Nor. Yep.
-Nor, yep.
233
00:11:00,226 --> 00:11:02,860
Ain't nobody calling
you Nor now.
234
00:11:02,937 --> 00:11:05,321
Look at you man,
custom made suits.
235
00:11:05,398 --> 00:11:08,783
Hmm. You ain't doin'
too bad yourself, bro.
236
00:11:08,860 --> 00:11:12,504
Man, I'd be doing a lot better
if I could get one of these
ideas off the ground, man.
237
00:11:12,580 --> 00:11:14,038
-Oh, yeah?
-Yeah.
238
00:11:14,115 --> 00:11:16,791
I got big ideas jumpin' off
all the time. (laughs)
239
00:11:16,868 --> 00:11:21,304
In fact, you standin' in one
of my big ideas right now.
240
00:11:28,713 --> 00:11:29,813
What you lookin' at?
241
00:11:32,175 --> 00:11:35,727
Now, see, what may look like
an ordinary old church to you,
242
00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:38,980
to me... it's a club.
243
00:11:39,056 --> 00:11:40,523
A club?
244
00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:42,024
A comedy club.
245
00:11:42,101 --> 00:11:44,110
Now hold on, stand
right over here.
246
00:11:44,187 --> 00:11:45,987
Now over here,
this is the stage, okay?
247
00:11:46,063 --> 00:11:47,739
Now right, we're
going to put a bar.
248
00:11:47,815 --> 00:11:49,490
And this wall,
just get rid of it.
249
00:11:49,567 --> 00:11:50,742
Knock this
whole thing out.
250
00:11:50,818 --> 00:11:52,276
Extend the seating
out that way.
251
00:11:52,353 --> 00:11:53,411
And right here
where you're standing,
252
00:11:53,488 --> 00:11:54,454
that's the
dance floor.
253
00:11:54,530 --> 00:11:55,880
Check it out,
I got a name, okay.
254
00:11:55,957 --> 00:11:58,207
You ain't going
to believe this.
255
00:11:58,284 --> 00:11:59,751
"Buster Guts."
256
00:11:59,827 --> 00:12:00,910
You get it?
257
00:12:00,987 --> 00:12:02,253
It's like "bust a gut"
258
00:12:02,330 --> 00:12:03,755
but it's "bust-er gut."
259
00:12:03,831 --> 00:12:05,214
Now that's comedy, man.
260
00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:06,758
What do you think?
261
00:12:06,834 --> 00:12:08,968
D, listen, you know,
262
00:12:09,045 --> 00:12:10,928
you have to really
know what you're doing
263
00:12:11,005 --> 00:12:13,139
to put up a club and
it cost a lot of money.
264
00:12:13,216 --> 00:12:15,183
Money ain't a thing, man.
That's where you come in.
265
00:12:15,259 --> 00:12:16,359
You're gonna give me
the seed money
266
00:12:16,436 --> 00:12:18,352
to get it started,
because the way I figure it,
267
00:12:18,429 --> 00:12:20,480
if you got ten grand
to dump into the ground,
268
00:12:20,556 --> 00:12:21,773
you definitely
got ten grand
269
00:12:21,783 --> 00:12:24,242
to launch a dream.
270
00:12:25,603 --> 00:12:27,028
Woo.
271
00:12:27,104 --> 00:12:29,330
Why does he do this? Why?
272
00:12:29,407 --> 00:12:31,374
Why does D do this?
273
00:12:34,821 --> 00:12:36,746
You know, maybe D has changed.
274
00:12:36,823 --> 00:12:38,206
I shouldn't
judge him, America.
275
00:12:38,282 --> 00:12:39,624
I shouldn't judge him
by his past.
276
00:12:39,700 --> 00:12:41,501
Maybe it's probably
just a loan.
277
00:12:41,577 --> 00:12:45,180
And I'm sure he's got every
intention on paying me back.
278
00:12:46,165 --> 00:12:47,765
The nerve of that damn fool,
279
00:12:47,842 --> 00:12:49,342
askin' me for ten
damn thousand dollars.
280
00:12:49,352 --> 00:12:50,602
I should have given him
281
00:12:50,678 --> 00:12:52,470
10,000 kicks right in the crack
of his damn ass.
282
00:12:52,547 --> 00:12:54,080
That's what I should have did.
283
00:12:56,092 --> 00:12:59,018
Okay, I'm going
to give him the money.
284
00:12:59,095 --> 00:13:01,654
But this time,
we puttin' it on paper,
285
00:13:01,731 --> 00:13:04,774
and he got to have a solid
business plan,
286
00:13:04,851 --> 00:13:06,951
and it better be notarized.
287
00:13:09,605 --> 00:13:11,781
(crying)
288
00:13:11,858 --> 00:13:14,492
Bernie Mac is depressed.
289
00:13:14,569 --> 00:13:19,172
Damn, damn, damn!
290
00:13:24,412 --> 00:13:27,338
Well, mm...
291
00:13:27,415 --> 00:13:29,349
D is D.
292
00:13:35,890 --> 00:13:38,307
(ringing)
293
00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:40,485
(groans)
294
00:13:44,449 --> 00:13:46,107
Hello.
295
00:13:46,183 --> 00:13:48,276
Good morning, this isthe front desk. It's 7:20.
296
00:13:48,352 --> 00:13:50,903
No, I didn't have
no wake-up call, sweetheart.
297
00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:53,239
You got the wrong number.
298
00:13:53,316 --> 00:13:54,958
I ordered it.
299
00:13:55,034 --> 00:13:57,118
Mom can have visitors at 8:00,
300
00:13:57,194 --> 00:13:59,161
so we have to be
on the road by 7:30.
301
00:13:59,238 --> 00:14:01,840
You have about five minutes.
302
00:14:11,125 --> 00:14:12,934
All of our patients
are in their rooms
303
00:14:13,011 --> 00:14:15,219
right now for private
reflection time.
304
00:14:15,296 --> 00:14:18,014
We set visiting hours
to coincide with this time,
305
00:14:18,090 --> 00:14:20,349
because it's nice
and peaceful and quiet.
306
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:21,860
Okay.
307
00:14:21,936 --> 00:14:24,186
I made that.
308
00:14:24,263 --> 00:14:26,364
Stacy, you have visitors.
309
00:14:29,569 --> 00:14:31,160
Stacy?
310
00:14:35,900 --> 00:14:37,283
Where's Mommy?
311
00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:38,659
That's a very
good question.
312
00:14:38,736 --> 00:14:39,902
Excuse me.
313
00:14:39,980 --> 00:14:42,330
Bob, it's Donna.
We have a situation.
314
00:14:42,406 --> 00:14:45,216
Maybe it'd be better
if you came back later.
315
00:14:47,036 --> 00:14:48,544
Hey, listen, we're going to go.
316
00:14:48,621 --> 00:14:51,130
We'll see your mother
at the funeral, okay?
317
00:14:51,141 --> 00:14:53,474
Come on, baby girl.
Come on, Jordan.
318
00:15:12,728 --> 00:15:14,412
Let's move on.
319
00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:18,616
Hey, y'all.
Y'all ready?
320
00:15:18,693 --> 00:15:20,076
Uncle Bernie...
321
00:15:20,152 --> 00:15:21,344
Huh?
322
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:23,204
I don't want to see dead people.
323
00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:25,206
You're not going to see
any dead people, baby.
324
00:15:25,282 --> 00:15:27,416
We're just going to go
say a few nice words,
325
00:15:27,493 --> 00:15:28,768
and pay our respects.
326
00:15:28,678 --> 00:15:31,295
When you die,
I'm going to say my respects.
327
00:15:31,372 --> 00:15:33,673
Uncle Bernie, when you die
can I have your house?
328
00:15:33,749 --> 00:15:35,850
I'm going to outlive y'all.
329
00:15:35,927 --> 00:15:37,644
(telephone rings)
330
00:15:39,839 --> 00:15:41,514
Hello?
331
00:15:41,590 --> 00:15:42,848
Stacy.
332
00:15:42,925 --> 00:15:44,767
Hey, girl,
what happened to you?
333
00:15:44,778 --> 00:15:46,686
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, hold...
334
00:15:46,762 --> 00:15:48,270
Hold on now.
Watch your tone.
335
00:15:48,347 --> 00:15:49,747
Watch how you're
talking to me.
336
00:15:49,824 --> 00:15:51,607
You sitting up there
gonna try to trip on me.
337
00:15:51,684 --> 00:15:52,867
I'm trying to do you a favor.
338
00:15:52,944 --> 00:15:54,869
I bring your kids to see you,
you ain't there.
339
00:15:54,946 --> 00:15:56,204
You trying to get better?
340
00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:58,197
H-Hello?
341
00:15:58,208 --> 00:15:59,457
Hello?
342
00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:08,749
She got a lot
of nerve, America.
343
00:16:08,826 --> 00:16:12,169
How do I get to be the bad guy
after all I've done?
344
00:16:12,246 --> 00:16:13,821
Taking those kids in?
345
00:16:13,898 --> 00:16:17,091
She's lucky I've actually grown
fond of the ungrateful urchins.
346
00:16:17,168 --> 00:16:19,677
I mean, America,
no good deed...
347
00:16:19,754 --> 00:16:21,679
no good deed.
348
00:16:21,756 --> 00:16:23,723
She gonna trip out on me.
349
00:16:23,799 --> 00:16:25,808
Junkie.
350
00:16:25,885 --> 00:16:29,020
That's right.
Okay, what you call it?
351
00:16:29,096 --> 00:16:30,947
Okay? I thought so.
352
00:16:31,024 --> 00:16:35,576
( Amazing Grace plays)
353
00:16:39,398 --> 00:16:41,490
Psst. Psst.
354
00:16:41,567 --> 00:16:44,910
-Psst.
-What?
355
00:16:44,987 --> 00:16:46,495
I was thinking
about our club.
356
00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:49,498
You know who we should get
for our opening night act?
357
00:16:49,575 --> 00:16:50,791
Chris Tucker, boy.
358
00:16:50,868 --> 00:16:52,418
He really made me
laugh, you know.
359
00:16:52,495 --> 00:16:53,636
D. D...
360
00:16:53,713 --> 00:16:56,130
This ain't the time
or the place, man.
My God.
361
00:16:56,207 --> 00:17:00,009
You right, you right.
362
00:17:00,086 --> 00:17:04,722
I'll holler at you
over by the crypt.
363
00:17:04,799 --> 00:17:07,266
ALL: ♪ Amazing grace ♪
364
00:17:07,343 --> 00:17:12,354
♪ How sweet the sound ♪
365
00:17:12,431 --> 00:17:19,579
♪ That saveda wretch like me ♪
366
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:27,203
♪ I once was lost ♪
367
00:17:27,279 --> 00:17:31,957
♪ But now I'm found ♪
368
00:17:32,034 --> 00:17:33,676
♪ Was blind... ♪
369
00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:35,503
What do you think about
topless waitresses?
370
00:17:35,579 --> 00:17:38,130
D, I'm here to pay my last
respects to your father.
371
00:17:38,207 --> 00:17:39,256
No, no, your father.
372
00:17:39,333 --> 00:17:40,308
I know,
I'm just saying.
373
00:17:40,384 --> 00:17:42,343
I know what you're
saying, D. Shut up.
374
00:17:42,419 --> 00:17:44,512
♪ Was blind... ♪
375
00:17:44,588 --> 00:17:45,971
(humming)
376
00:17:46,048 --> 00:17:47,315
PASTOR:
Let us pray.
377
00:17:53,180 --> 00:17:55,698
Nighttime daycare.
Mull that one over.
378
00:18:02,207 --> 00:18:04,006
White liquor nights.
379
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,991
See, what's the first thing
pop into your head?
White people, right?
380
00:18:06,068 --> 00:18:07,535
But it ain't white people.
It's white liquor.
381
00:18:07,611 --> 00:18:09,995
You get it? It's like
a double, um, entourage...
382
00:18:10,072 --> 00:18:11,731
entree... what's the word?
383
00:18:15,202 --> 00:18:16,761
(voice cracking)
Bye, Daddy.
384
00:18:18,014 --> 00:18:20,589
I will give thanks to the Lord.
385
00:18:20,666 --> 00:18:21,723
Hey, Bern, I got this cat
386
00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:23,300
who got a line on
a liquor license.
387
00:18:23,377 --> 00:18:25,127
You want to holler
at him real quick?
388
00:18:25,204 --> 00:18:27,304
Some other time, D.
But he's on the phone
right now, man.
389
00:18:27,381 --> 00:18:29,598
He's a busy man.
It's not like he's going
to hang around forever.
390
00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:31,267
You want me to tell him
to call back later?
391
00:18:31,343 --> 00:18:32,434
I'll tell him
to call back later.
392
00:18:32,511 --> 00:18:34,353
Thou has set on the throne,
393
00:18:34,430 --> 00:18:37,398
given righteous judgment.
394
00:18:37,474 --> 00:18:39,024
Give me this doggone phone.
395
00:18:39,101 --> 00:18:41,110
Give it here, D!
396
00:18:41,187 --> 00:18:44,321
Before we commit
Elister's body
to the ground,
397
00:18:44,332 --> 00:18:46,949
would someone like to say
a few kind words
398
00:18:47,026 --> 00:18:49,085
about this gentle soul?
399
00:18:49,162 --> 00:18:50,452
I was just saying...
400
00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:51,871
This brother getting on my...
401
00:18:51,947 --> 00:18:53,330
All you ever wanted
was a handout.
402
00:18:53,341 --> 00:18:56,250
You dirty, greedy bastard!
403
00:18:56,327 --> 00:18:59,461
All you ever did in your life
is take, take, take.
404
00:18:59,538 --> 00:19:01,556
Why? All you did was sit
in the house and watch TV.
405
00:19:01,632 --> 00:19:04,016
Now you getting just
what the heck you deserve,
406
00:19:04,093 --> 00:19:06,635
and that's nothing.
Nothing!
407
00:19:06,712 --> 00:19:09,272
It ain't a person up in here
don't feel the same.
408
00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:11,724
Lord, I feel so much better
getting this off my chest,
409
00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:13,860
I swear to God.
Go to hell!
410
00:19:24,155 --> 00:19:26,572
I mean, it's
okay, Bernie.
411
00:19:26,649 --> 00:19:30,367
I know how much
you love your uncle.
412
00:19:30,444 --> 00:19:32,369
I ruined the burial,
didn't I?
413
00:19:32,446 --> 00:19:34,839
Oh, you didn't ruin anything.
414
00:19:34,916 --> 00:19:38,876
I know how D can
drive a man crazy.
415
00:19:38,953 --> 00:19:41,754
Mama Liva, I was thinking
about lending D the money
416
00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:43,672
to open up a comedy club.
417
00:19:43,749 --> 00:19:45,257
(laughs)
418
00:19:45,334 --> 00:19:48,177
Well, Beanie, you might as well
just give me the money,
419
00:19:48,254 --> 00:19:50,221
let me flush it
down the toilet,
420
00:19:50,297 --> 00:19:53,057
'cause that's exactly
what he's going to do.
421
00:19:53,067 --> 00:19:54,350
Oh, Mama Liva.
422
00:19:54,427 --> 00:19:56,852
Now, he's my son,
and I love him.
423
00:19:56,929 --> 00:19:58,687
But the boy is trifling.
424
00:19:58,764 --> 00:20:00,698
Now you keep your money.
425
00:20:02,810 --> 00:20:05,069
I'm just so sorry
I didn't get a chance
426
00:20:05,145 --> 00:20:06,820
to pay my respect to Uncle E.
427
00:20:06,897 --> 00:20:08,422
Oh, baby.
428
00:20:08,499 --> 00:20:13,035
You showed your respect
while he was alive,
429
00:20:13,046 --> 00:20:15,213
and that's what counts.
430
00:20:18,343 --> 00:20:21,335
Oh, Mama Liva, thanks.
431
00:20:21,412 --> 00:20:23,304
I love old people.
432
00:20:23,381 --> 00:20:26,257
You know, just when you think
you know everything,
433
00:20:26,333 --> 00:20:28,259
they drop
some knowledge on you,
434
00:20:28,335 --> 00:20:31,220
and open your eyes.
435
00:20:31,297 --> 00:20:33,856
Sometime when you think
you're protecting them,
436
00:20:33,933 --> 00:20:36,183
it's them protecting you.
437
00:20:36,260 --> 00:20:39,812
Respect your elders, America.
438
00:20:39,888 --> 00:20:41,605
And pay those respect
439
00:20:41,682 --> 00:20:43,816
like you're supposed
to pay your bills--
440
00:20:43,892 --> 00:20:45,401
I mean, on time.
441
00:20:45,477 --> 00:20:48,445
Don't wait till
the fifth and final notice.
442
00:20:48,522 --> 00:20:51,782
Y'all know who you are.
443
00:20:51,859 --> 00:20:53,659
Oh, you know.
444
00:20:53,736 --> 00:20:57,621
♪ Suddenlythe things you see ♪
445
00:20:57,632 --> 00:21:02,710
♪ Got you hurtin' so bad,so bad ♪
446
00:21:02,786 --> 00:21:09,767
♪ How come the things thatmake us happy make us sad? ♪
447
00:21:12,171 --> 00:21:16,348
♪ Joy... and pain ♪
448
00:21:16,425 --> 00:21:21,145
♪ Are likesunshine and rain ♪
449
00:21:21,221 --> 00:21:25,232
♪ Joy... and pain ♪
450
00:21:25,309 --> 00:21:31,447
♪ Are like sunshineand rain ♪
451
00:21:31,457 --> 00:21:34,959
♪ Love can be bitter ♪
452
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:41,498
I almost forgot how good
453
00:21:41,575 --> 00:21:43,709
your home-cooked food
taste like, girl.
454
00:21:43,786 --> 00:21:46,345
Well, let's see if
you remember this.
455
00:21:47,539 --> 00:21:49,548
Mm... Look at that.
456
00:21:49,625 --> 00:21:51,017
BRYANA:
Let me see.
457
00:21:52,586 --> 00:21:55,095
That's your Uncle Elister
right there, and that's me.
458
00:21:55,172 --> 00:21:58,140
Every Sunday he used to take me
fishing right over there,
459
00:21:58,217 --> 00:21:59,475
that little lake over there?
460
00:21:59,551 --> 00:22:00,893
And that's my first fish.
461
00:22:00,969 --> 00:22:02,353
He even named it.
462
00:22:02,429 --> 00:22:03,745
Oh, now, I don't know
about all of that.
463
00:22:03,822 --> 00:22:05,906
-Yes, you did.
-BOTH: Named it Earl. (laughs)
464
00:22:06,951 --> 00:22:08,951
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