Original subtitles

People I'd love to kill...

Manspreaders.

I mean, yeah, that's what he said to me.

- Donna in the minimarket. - ...he was saying.

Who is never happy to help.

...all up in my face...

You've got an alligator in your garden, and what?

- Ahh. - How big is it?

Norman from work.

No, I can't put that on the front page.

For failing to acknowledge my potential.

Jeff from work.

For having zero spatial awareness.

Ah!

Night!

Actually, everybody at work.

People who have sex with you

and then only reply to your texts with emojis.

My sister, Seren, for leaving me on read,

on my phone, and in my life in general.

Our mum, for leaving

and forgetting to tell us where she went.

And forever at the top of my list,

Julia Blenkingsopp.

Did you hear Rhiannon died?

Oh, no. I, I didn't-

Who subjected me

to a relentless campaign of psychological abuse.

Eroding my self-worth and general context in the world.

Oh my god, do you smell that? It smells like decay!

She's so weird.

Julia Blenkingsopp,

for making me pull so much of my hair out,

that I had to wear a wig.

Julia Blenkingsopp, for turning me into a ghost.

Making me forever invisible, and afraid.

And I'd kill my dad...

for dying.

And leaving me to deal with everything alone.

Dad? Dad?!

Nur-?! Nurse?!

Nurse! Oh, excuse me!

I pulled out the wire.

- You prick! - No, you're too easy.

Oh.

- You alright? - Yeah.

All right. Got you some bits.

Yes! Give me my, knife, would you.

Yeah.

Here you go.

Thanks. What happened there?

Ah, just tea.

Jeff, uh, bumped into me.

It was an accident.

You let people take the piss.

You need to learn to stand up for yourself.

I know.

Ah, don't just say you know. Do it.

I'm serious, Rhiannon.

Don't let people walk all over you.

Make 'em see you, how you are.

How special you are.

Just be more...

RAHR!

You trying to kill me?

You sound worse.

Has anyone been in to see you today?

I told you,

someone will be with you as soon as they're available.

- Excuse me? - Come on!

- It will take you two minutes! - Sorry, can I?

- This isn't good enough. Um-

I pay for your fucking wages!

Oh! Can I have a raise then?

My mate wants a mini trifle,

so he should get a mini fucking trifle!

Don't speak to me like that, sir.

- Sorry, I, I just need, um- - Hey, I'm talking to you!

Hi, excuse me?

Fine, I'll do it myself then...

And myself...

- You can't go-- My dad, um-...

for being so helpless without him.

He's crashing...

For letting him down, again.

People I'd love to kill...

Everyone.

♪ Swallow my tongue back of my throat,

♪ Like it's finite ♪

♪ Only so long I can chew till I choke ♪

♪ Hide in plain sight ♪

♪ What have you done my rabbit run ♪

♪ Caught in the headlights ♪

♪ And I'm bigger now ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ So say my name like I'm 10 feet tall ♪

♪ Bow your head like I'm royal ♪

♪ And every day that I get older ♪

♪ Bow your head like I'm royal ♪

♪ I guess my blood's running colder ♪

You look nice.

Tommy will be so missed,

and not just by the people whose extensions he didn't finish

- before he fell ill.

Oh, what time d'you call this?

As I was saying, Tommy will be missed.

Hi.

But he'll be missed most by his family.

I thought you weren't coming.

The flight was delayed.

Daughter Seren, mother to his only grandchild, Noel.

Son in law, Xavier.

Daughter and carer, Rhian.

- That's not my name. - Shhh.

And not to mention his dedicated employees,

Andrew, Craig and Shaun, whom he saw as family.

And all the other friends, colleagues and clients,

who have come to say goodbye one final time.

And now,

to play Tommy out of this life and onto whatever awaits,

is a cover of a song by his favorite artist,

Bruce Springsteen.

Because Tommy was, 'A Boss' too.

Literally.

He ran a limited company and employed three other people.

I told him to say that.

Tommy, this one's for you.

Carefully chosen by...

Rhian.

♪ Hey little girl, is your daddy home? ♪

♪ Did he go away and leave you all alone? ♪

♪ I got a bad desire ♪

That's actually quite nice.

♪ Oh, oh, oh I'm on fire ♪

He- he said he'd haunt me if I didn't.

♪ Tell me now baby, is he good to you? ♪

♪ And does he do to you the things that I do? ♪

♪ Oh, oh ♪

♪ I can take you higher ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh I'm on fire ♪

- Thank you. - Oh, uh, thank you.

- Very sorry. - Thank you.

- So sorry, Rhian. - Uh, it's actually...

Rhiannon.

So sorry.

What is she doing here?

She moved back. She wanted to pay her respects.

♪ I step on you ♪

♪ To sip on fire ♪

♪ I got this feeling ♪

♪ That I can't go back ♪

♪ I got this feeling ♪

♪ That I can't go back ♪

♪ I burn my eyes ♪

Oh, Julia!

Um, excuse me?

There are a lot of dirty glasses on our table.

Oh, okay, um...

Hi, Aunty Brenda it's...

Rhiannon. Tommy's daughter.

Oh.

Are you the one that lives in France?

No, that's Seren.

I'm just...

here.

So, you don't work here?

No.

- She doesn't work here. - Oh no, really?

- Oh, sorry. - Oh, steady on.

- Oh hi! Hi. - Oh, hi-

Uhh...

It was really nice of you to come.

No, yeah, like, obviously. You know, Tommy was like, yeah.

- Anyway- - So, how have you been?

- Sorry, what's that? - Sorry.

I was just asking how you've been.

Ah, um...

I'm pretty sad actually.

Yeah...

Yeah, me too.

Anyway um, it was good to see you.

- Yeah. - I should deliver these.

Oh maybe we could get coffee or something, sometime?

Yeah...

yeah, okay.

I mean you've got my number, so.

Yeah but um, I don't know if it's working.

Does it end in two, seven, four?

Yeah, that's the one.

- Okay. - Cool.

- D'you want anything? - No thanks, babes.

I'll get, uh, red wine...

At school she made me think

I'd died and was just a ghost in a uniform.

Ah? What's that?

Nothing.

I should...

It was good seeing ya.

Bye.

You alright? Here we go.

- Julia. - Cheers.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

Cheers mate.

Sorry.

I got' em to do mini scotch eggs especially.

I only eat meat when I'm menstruating.

Oh, come on it's a special occasion.

Rhiannon, can you stop waving meat in my face!

Oh, sorry. Didn't see you.

There are like, zero vegetarian options.

Who the fuck eats iceberg lettuce?

You should have a word with whoever did the food,

looks like an impoverished child's birthday party.

Yeah Rhiannon, did you even send them my dietary requirements?

Oh my God, hi! It's been so long, hasn't it?

I mean, I haven't seen you since school!

So long ago.

We're all so different now, aren't we?

So how are you? What have you been up to?

Rhiannon!?

My dad died.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Julia!

What? Pidge wants some chipolatas.

Excuse me.

Stop being weird.

Were you just gonna go?

I did look for you.

It was nice to catch up.

Yeah, I haven't seen the girls for ages!

They're all going for a reunion drink at SQR tomorrow.

You should go.

Are you joking?

What?

She pretended not to recognize me.

Julia?

Maybe she didn't.

Yeah, right.

Rhiannon,

we need to sell the house.

And the business probably.

What?

But I, but I live in the house!

There are other houses.

But this is dad's house!

Seren...

our home.

- You could always buy me out. - What with?

I'm an admin assistant. A bag of stationary?!

Well, Xav and I wanna buy a place, so...

Well, why don't you move back?

You could move back in,

and then we could all be like a little family.

It won't just be Tink and me-

Are you serious?

But where would I go?

All- all of dad's stuff-

Sorry. It's happening.

I've got an estate agent. Julia's doing it.

No. Seren.

Yes. Rhiannon, she's doing us a favor.

Her new place doesn't normally take anything

under a half a mill.

Seren, you can't let her-

Let's talk about it later, yeah.

- Seren, please! - I'll ring you.

I'll sort it.

Bye.

Okay.

This could be a good thing for you.

New start.

What?! Dad's dead!

I know. He was my dad, too.

You need to get over this Julia thing.

Go to SQR. You might have fun.

People I'd love to kill.

Julia Blenkingsopp.

For getting to live the perfect life,

when she ruined mine.

And now coming back to do it all over again.

♪ Destroy everything you touch today ♪

♪ Destroy me this way ♪

♪ Anything that may desert you ♪

♪ So it cannot hurt you ♪

♪ You only have to look behind you ♪

♪ At who's underlined you ♪

♪ Destroy everything you touch today ♪

♪ Destroy me this way ♪

Tink, come here.

♪ Crying ♪

♪ Crying never did nobody no good no how ♪

♪ That's why I ♪

- ♪ I don't cry ♪ - What?

♪ That's why I ♪

♪ I don't cry ♪

Rahr!

Morning!

I'm back.

People I'd love to kill...

My colleagues for failing to notice

there's been a woman sized hole on reception

for the last ten days.

My dad, for saying I should stand up for myself

and then dying. So now I have to.

Do I need pet insurance? No.

My boss, Norman.

Because I don't have any pets.

For only seeing me as a coat rack.

When I could be so much more.

- Oo! - Can I get a word, Norman?

Oh, oh, that's not for me! I was- Er, yeah, yeah...

Um...

What can I do for you?

I'd like to be considered for the Junior Reporter position.

Please.

O- kay...

Um, wasn't expecting that.

Um, what's brought this on?

I've been here a while now, and...

I thought it was time for a change.

So, here is my CV for your perusal.

Oh...

Well you said when I started

there would be scope for progression

and um, I haven't actually uh, progressed.

But, I'd like to.

You don't have to read it now-

Yeah well, I've read it. It's quite short.

Well, I've been working on some story ideas

that could be good for us.

Um, for example, someone found a perfectly preserved cat

in the Carndale flats redevelopment.

I thought it could be a good uh, human interest story?

Or, um...

There's a residents meeting happening next week

about the surgery closures.

I could cover that.

Okay, there's, there's more, if you-

The thing is, Sweetpea.

I don't really see you in editorial.

Well cause, I'm not there yet, you know.

I'm over there, but I'd like to be, there.

The last pair I had,

the lens shattered 'cause I was cycling too fast.

And Jeff is...

- Great. - Yeah.

But, as Junior Reporter

I could focus on engaging my demographic.

Mmmm, it's just you don't have the umm...

to be uh...

Y'know? You're a bit...

la, la, la, la, la...

You need to be, rahr!

So the question I would ask is,

do you have that killer instinct to uh,

do that, y'know, the job?

Well, maybe not now, but I can learn.

Well, you, you do that. And then we'll talk.

Good?

Was there something else?

Uh, no. Thank you.

Oh, would you put these in the uh,

recycling, on your way out?

Hi! Sorry.

Is this-

Are, are you reception?

Um, administrative assistant.

Sorry. I'm AJ.

Pierce. Here- here to see Norman.

That's a serious bit of kit you got there.

Perfect for all those...

administrative emergencies.

There's nothing in here.

Um...

Hi!

I can just go through.

No!

S-sorry, he- he likes me to call f-

Anthony, son! Get over here.

Thank you.

Fuck am I for then?!

Sorry, I didn't catch your name?

Oh uh, R-Rhiannon.

Thank you, Rhiannon.

Oh uh, that's fine.

You couldn't do us some teas could you, Sweetpea?

Ehhh...

How's your mum?

Saw her in the garden the other day.

Lovely top she had on.

She's always so well turned out, isn't she?

Fuck.

Thanks for coming in. What, no, thank you!

A minute of your time, folks!

I'd like to introduce you to AJ.

Hello.

AJ will be our new junior reporter from tomorrow.

- What? Be nice to him.

Not too nice. Lana, I know what you're like.

- Lock up your daughters! - Uh no, lock up your...

- notepads. And your mum!

His mum's lovely.

Yeah.

Anyway, welcome.

And, uh, I'll show you out. That, that's out.

Yeah.

That was mine.

What's the fucking point?

People I'd love to kill...

This fucking nepo-baby,

who thinks he's entitled to everything, including my job.

- Ahh! - Jesus, fuck!

Uh, sorry!

- What are you? - I was just-

- Shat myself- - There's um...

A...

A form.

A form?

Yeah like a, new employee form to fill out.

Oh-

And I don't have your email, so.

- Okay. - That's why I'm here.

- Can I have it? - Yeah, uh...

I think uh,

think Norman already has it but...

- There you go. - Thanks.

You- you must really like your job.

Or I must really hate it

and need an excuse to get out of the office.

Um...

This is gonna sound weird, but, did I take your job?

Well, it's not my job is it? It's your job, so.

Okay.

So, congrats!

Bye.

Bye.

You, are you okay, there?

Yeah.

Alright.

- Ah, missed you.

Fucks sake!

Ow!

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No, no, no, no.

Tink.

Tink...

Hey Seren, hope France is good. Tink's dead now, too.

He's dead. And I um...

Please don't sell the house, Seren.

Please. It's my home.

She can't take this, too.

And you can tell Julia to just leave me alone.

I don't want her in the house.

I don't, I don't want her here.

And Dad wouldn't want it.

And he said,

I need to stop letting people take the piss.

So you can just tell her just- just fuck off!

She is not gonna ruin my life again!

Actually, I'll tell her.

Julia?! Julia!

Oh, Rhiannon! I didn't see you!

What are you doing here?

Stop it. Okay?

Stop what?

Are you okay?

Do you need a drink of water?

No, I don't need a drink of water.

I need you to stay out of my house.

Okay, I don't want you in it!

Oh, babe.

You need to sort this out with your sister.

I'm just doing this for Seren.

Why me, Julia?

Sorry?!

Stop pretending that you don't know what you did.

I've no idea what you're talking-

You ruined my life!

I don't know who I am.

You, you made me nothing.

And you're back and you're doing it again now!

You're selling my house. You killed my dog.

My life is shit because of you! So just stop, okay.

Stop!

Babe, I'm not in your life. So all the shit, that's on you.

You didn't exist to me then, and you don't now.

Delusional.

It's like you're obsessed with me.

It's fucking creepy.

You're not still doing that, are you?

Bedtime I think, Rhiannon.

- What's going on, babe? - Oh, nothing.

You made me this way.

She was like that at school. Always making stuff up.

I think she's just lonely.

Shit without you.

Oh! What the fuck?!

Whoa, didn't see ya'.

- Ah, what the fuck?! - D'you see me now?!

I'll fucking end you, you stupid bitch!

You fucking cut me!

My fucking shirt! I love this shirt!

Oh, you're fucked. You are so fucked.

You are so fucking-

Do you see me now?

Do you see me now?

Do you see me now?

Ah-

RAHHHHHHRRRRRRRR!

♪ It was a Wednesday ♪

♪ I got the Kool-Aid ♪

♪ I hear the kick drum ♪

♪ Talking to my baby ♪

♪ I wanna feel the ocean ♪

♪ Put on my suntan lotion ♪

♪ I see the sun glow ♪

♪ Water moving slow motion ♪

♪ I got a beach chair ♪

♪ I see the blonde hair ♪

♪ Kick up my feet there ♪

♪ I feel the cool air ♪

♪ The breeze is nice now ♪

♪ I'll tell you right now ♪

♪ I sip my Kool-Aid ♪

♪ I'm feeling better now ♪

♪ Do I need a vacation? ♪

♪ Just need to get away for a while ♪

♪ Wait, did I forget my sunglasses? ♪

♪ Nope Got 'em ♪

♪ I paint my nails pink ♪

♪ They're in the sand though ♪

♪ I hear the old soul ♪

♪ Coming out my radio ♪

♪ I see a young boy ♪

♪ Hanging on a rope swing ♪

♪ He gets a nosebleed ♪

♪ And I hear the gull sing ♪