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1
00:00:06,130 --> 00:00:07,170
- I picked up your order
from the printers.
2
00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:09,700
- Oh, the anniversary flyer.
3
00:00:09,700 --> 00:00:11,340
Let me see.
4
00:00:12,870 --> 00:00:15,140
Oh, it looks great!
5
00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:16,480
- What the heck?
6
00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:18,310
He only gave us one.
7
00:00:18,310 --> 00:00:20,450
- I only ordered one.
8
00:00:20,450 --> 00:00:23,620
This is for the regulars,
and they know where to look.
9
00:00:23,620 --> 00:00:25,320
- The anniversary party is on?
10
00:00:25,320 --> 00:00:27,620
I just heard Tall Kathy talking
to Short Kathy about it.
11
00:00:27,620 --> 00:00:28,690
- It's on.
12
00:00:28,690 --> 00:00:29,820
- Yes!
13
00:00:29,820 --> 00:00:32,190
Oh, Izzy, you are
going to love this.
14
00:00:32,190 --> 00:00:35,660
We have a raffle and karaoke,
and there's a roast.
15
00:00:35,660 --> 00:00:36,830
- Who gets roasted?
16
00:00:36,830 --> 00:00:38,000
- The regulars.
17
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:40,570
Every year, Daddy would emcee,
and he loved them so much
18
00:00:40,570 --> 00:00:44,170
that he'd just rip them
to shreds.
19
00:00:44,170 --> 00:00:46,740
- He's like Joan Rivers and Don
Rickles just rolled into one.
20
00:00:46,740 --> 00:00:50,310
You know, he'd be all like,
zing, zing, zingity-zing!
21
00:00:50,310 --> 00:00:53,680
- OK, the bar is
absolutely buzzing
22
00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:55,650
about the anniversary party.
23
00:00:55,650 --> 00:00:57,220
- But who's going to emcee?
24
00:00:57,220 --> 00:00:58,790
Happy left some really
big shoes to fill.
25
00:00:58,790 --> 00:01:00,590
- I've got somebody in mind.
26
00:01:00,590 --> 00:01:03,590
They know the tavern,
naturally funny,
27
00:01:03,590 --> 00:01:07,860
and they have a gorgeous mane
of red hair.
28
00:01:07,860 --> 00:01:09,560
- Oh, Bobbie,
I'm flattered,
29
00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:12,470
but I don't think
I need to dye my hair.
30
00:01:12,470 --> 00:01:14,870
- I'm talking about me,
ya hockey puck.
31
00:01:14,870 --> 00:01:16,200
Zing, zing!
32
00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:17,600
- Oh, I'm sorry.
33
00:01:17,610 --> 00:01:21,210
I just was confused because
I'm the obvious choice.
34
00:01:21,210 --> 00:01:23,310
- You really think
you're the obvious choice
35
00:01:23,310 --> 00:01:25,180
to replace my dad?
36
00:01:25,180 --> 00:01:26,410
My mistake.
37
00:01:26,410 --> 00:01:29,580
I thought we were going off
comedic talent, not nepotism.
38
00:01:29,580 --> 00:01:30,720
Zing, zing.
39
00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:32,550
- Oh, OK.
40
00:01:32,550 --> 00:01:35,490
Maybe we just take it
down a notch.
41
00:01:35,490 --> 00:01:37,290
- Happy you always said
that if anyone thought
42
00:01:37,290 --> 00:01:38,490
they were funnier than him,
43
00:01:38,490 --> 00:01:41,730
they could challenge him
for the job.
44
00:01:41,730 --> 00:01:44,200
- That would be up a notch.
45
00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:46,500
- I live for drama.
46
00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:47,840
- You know what?
47
00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:48,870
Game on.
48
00:01:48,870 --> 00:01:50,370
- Oh, all right.
49
00:01:50,370 --> 00:01:53,240
Challenge accepted.
50
00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:56,710
- I have a bad feeling
about this.
51
00:01:56,710 --> 00:01:57,910
- Oh, don't worry.
52
00:01:57,910 --> 00:01:59,480
We'll still be friends, right?
53
00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:00,950
- Yeah,
this is just two friends
54
00:02:00,950 --> 00:02:02,620
having a friendly competition.
55
00:02:02,620 --> 00:02:04,690
- Two funny ladies being funny.
56
00:02:04,690 --> 00:02:05,950
It'll be great.
57
00:02:05,950 --> 00:02:07,720
And Emmett and Takoda
can judge.
58
00:02:07,720 --> 00:02:08,920
- I'm already bored.
59
00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,660
Wake me up when there's drama.
60
00:02:12,490 --> 00:02:16,830
{\an8} ♪ Sometimes it feels
like a big ol' fight ♪
61
00:02:16,830 --> 00:02:18,630
{\an8}♪ To get through the day ♪
62
00:02:18,630 --> 00:02:20,670
{\an8}♪ And sleep on
through the night ♪
63
00:02:20,670 --> 00:02:22,740
♪ But here
you'll find a place ♪
64
00:02:22,740 --> 00:02:26,340
♪ That'll surely
lift your spirits ♪
65
00:02:26,340 --> 00:02:31,580
♪ You belong
at Happy's Place ♪
66
00:02:31,980 --> 00:02:33,510
{\an8}- Boy, it smells good in here.
67
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:36,420
{\an8}- Must be the grease cleaner.
68
00:02:36,420 --> 00:02:39,490
{\an8}Highly toxic with just a touch
of lemon scent.
69
00:02:39,490 --> 00:02:42,690
{\an8}- Have I ever told you
how valuable you are?
70
00:02:42,690 --> 00:02:43,960
{\an8}- Once. Just now.
71
00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:46,290
{\an8}What do you want?
72
00:02:46,290 --> 00:02:47,930
{\an8}- Want? Me?
73
00:02:47,930 --> 00:02:49,730
{\an8}I want for nothing.
74
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,570
{\an8}OK, I want you to promise me
that you'll vote for me
75
00:02:53,570 --> 00:02:54,800
{\an8}'cause I want to be the emcee
76
00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:55,940
{\an8}at the anniversary party.
77
00:02:55,940 --> 00:02:57,640
{\an8}- Mm-hmm. No.
78
00:02:57,640 --> 00:03:00,710
{\an8}- Come on, Emmett,
what's the big deal?
79
00:03:00,710 --> 00:03:02,840
{\an8}- I realize you don't know
anything about judging
80
00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:04,880
{\an8}a talent contest.
81
00:03:05,880 --> 00:03:08,950
{\an8}The decision should be made
on talent and talent alone.
82
00:03:08,950 --> 00:03:10,880
{\an8}And that's what
America expects,
83
00:03:10,890 --> 00:03:13,720
{\an8}and that's what
America deserves.
84
00:03:15,620 --> 00:03:19,830
{\an8}- 2:03 and Emmett
has lost his mind.
85
00:03:19,830 --> 00:03:21,930
{\an8}- I thought you were looking
forward to this competition.
86
00:03:21,930 --> 00:03:23,630
{\an8}- Only if I win.
87
00:03:23,630 --> 00:03:25,700
{\an8}Do you have any idea why
nobody ever challenged Daddy?
88
00:03:25,700 --> 00:03:27,840
{\an8}- 'Cause they didn't
want to get fired?
89
00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:31,570
{\an8}- No, 'cause he was the heart
and soul of this place.
90
00:03:31,570 --> 00:03:33,540
{\an8}That's when he let it shine.
91
00:03:33,540 --> 00:03:35,810
{\an8}I want people to think of me
the same way.
92
00:03:35,810 --> 00:03:37,750
- Then win the damn thing.
93
00:03:37,750 --> 00:03:40,350
Winning doesn't mean anything
if it's not fair and square.
94
00:03:40,350 --> 00:03:42,580
I'm not going to take
that away from you.
95
00:03:42,580 --> 00:03:43,680
- Fine.
96
00:03:43,690 --> 00:03:47,690
2:04, Emmett turned
into a traitor.
97
00:03:47,690 --> 00:03:49,660
2:04?
98
00:03:49,660 --> 00:03:51,390
Time for my break.
99
00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:58,370
- So how's prepping for the
big showdown with Gabby going?
100
00:03:58,370 --> 00:03:59,770
- It's hard to tell.
101
00:03:59,770 --> 00:04:02,400
These walls may talk,
but they sure don't laugh.
102
00:04:03,100 --> 00:04:05,510
- Hey.
103
00:04:05,510 --> 00:04:07,910
I just told two people
at the bar a funny story,
104
00:04:07,910 --> 00:04:10,340
and they said, and I quote--
105
00:04:20,790 --> 00:04:23,390
- Well, I'm so glad you're
into the competition, Gabby.
106
00:04:23,390 --> 00:04:25,060
Me, too.
- Hm, really?
107
00:04:25,060 --> 00:04:26,690
- Oh, yeah.
108
00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:29,400
I said something to Isabella,
and she laughed so hard
109
00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:32,330
that she smashed her head
on the desk.
110
00:04:33,970 --> 00:04:35,570
- Ow?
111
00:04:37,540 --> 00:04:39,510
- Yeah, well, I better get back
out there, you know?
112
00:04:39,510 --> 00:04:41,340
Oh, what's that now?
113
00:04:41,340 --> 00:04:44,480
They're calling me
the new Happy.
114
00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:46,710
Oh, I'm coming, Tall Kathy.
115
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:48,450
Hold your horses.
116
00:04:50,650 --> 00:04:52,750
- I'm kind of jealous
of this competition you're in.
117
00:04:52,750 --> 00:04:55,760
It reminds me of when I was
on the debate team in college.
118
00:04:55,760 --> 00:05:00,030
Not to brag,
but we were undefeated.
119
00:05:00,030 --> 00:05:03,060
- That is bragging.
120
00:05:03,060 --> 00:05:05,700
And very interesting.
121
00:05:05,700 --> 00:05:07,970
I actually know of a way
that you can be
122
00:05:07,970 --> 00:05:09,040
part of the competition.
123
00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:10,640
- How fun.
124
00:05:10,640 --> 00:05:11,910
What do you need me to do?
125
00:05:11,910 --> 00:05:14,480
- Help me destroy Gabby.
126
00:05:16,910 --> 00:05:18,650
- OK.
127
00:05:18,650 --> 00:05:21,450
Want to help, but not sure I'm
comfortable destroying someone.
128
00:05:21,450 --> 00:05:23,380
- No, I just want you
to help me with my act.
129
00:05:23,390 --> 00:05:24,420
- Oh.
130
00:05:24,420 --> 00:05:25,890
Oh, my gosh, of course.
131
00:05:25,890 --> 00:05:28,420
This is exactly like
speech and debate.
132
00:05:28,420 --> 00:05:29,590
Oh, man, I'm so excited.
133
00:05:29,590 --> 00:05:31,890
Let's make those
Barnard girls cry!
134
00:05:34,830 --> 00:05:36,060
- Oh, OK.
135
00:05:36,060 --> 00:05:37,830
Well, I have some
material ready.
136
00:05:37,830 --> 00:05:39,000
It just needs
a little polishing.
137
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:40,870
- Great.
Persuade me.
138
00:05:40,870 --> 00:05:41,900
I mean, make me laugh.
139
00:05:41,900 --> 00:05:43,600
- Yeah.
140
00:05:43,610 --> 00:05:45,010
All right,
so I'm gonna start off
141
00:05:45,010 --> 00:05:46,610
by introducing myself,
142
00:05:46,610 --> 00:05:47,810
and then I'm gonna do
the crowd work.
143
00:05:47,810 --> 00:05:49,710
- Oh, love that.
144
00:05:49,710 --> 00:05:50,510
- Yeah.
145
00:05:50,510 --> 00:05:53,620
And then I'm gonna say,
nice hat.
146
00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:59,550
And then I'm gonna
go into my hat jokes.
147
00:05:59,550 --> 00:06:01,120
- Who are you saying
"nice hat" to?
148
00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:02,460
- Emmett.
149
00:06:02,460 --> 00:06:04,890
I'm gonna give
Emmett this hat.
150
00:06:04,890 --> 00:06:08,700
- You think Emmett is going
to put on a funny hat?
151
00:06:09,930 --> 00:06:12,930
- OK, maybe I get rid
of all the hat jokes.
152
00:06:13,940 --> 00:06:15,800
I'm just gonna go
into my routine, OK?
153
00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:17,140
- So excited.
154
00:06:17,140 --> 00:06:19,110
OK.
155
00:06:19,110 --> 00:06:22,480
Two bartenders are fighting
over what the best drink is,
156
00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:23,510
and one says it's--
157
00:06:23,510 --> 00:06:24,850
- Bobbie, look up.
- What?
158
00:06:24,850 --> 00:06:26,750
- Well, you want to look
at the audience.
159
00:06:26,750 --> 00:06:28,020
- Oh, right.
160
00:06:28,020 --> 00:06:29,850
OK.
161
00:06:29,850 --> 00:06:32,820
Tell your monkey that's
how we make it in New York!
162
00:06:37,990 --> 00:06:39,060
Come on.
163
00:06:39,060 --> 00:06:40,800
That's hilarious.
164
00:06:41,930 --> 00:06:45,030
- I feel like you
left out the middle.
165
00:06:45,030 --> 00:06:46,900
- You made me look up.
166
00:06:48,540 --> 00:06:49,940
What's the matter with me?
167
00:06:49,940 --> 00:06:51,270
I'm funny.
168
00:06:51,270 --> 00:06:55,010
I know a lot of people say they
are, and they're not, but I am.
169
00:06:55,010 --> 00:06:56,680
- I know what's going on.
170
00:06:56,680 --> 00:06:59,550
This means a lot to you,
and you're trying too hard.
171
00:06:59,550 --> 00:07:00,950
- Yeah, you're right.
172
00:07:00,950 --> 00:07:02,820
I gotta loosen up.
173
00:07:02,820 --> 00:07:04,990
- Same thing would happen to my
friend Kristi on debate team.
174
00:07:04,990 --> 00:07:07,590
- Yeah?
- She was naturally persuasive.
175
00:07:07,590 --> 00:07:10,760
She convinced me
to get a mullet once.
176
00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:13,130
But put her behind a podium,
and she'd freeze.
177
00:07:13,130 --> 00:07:14,960
- I don't want to freeze.
178
00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:16,230
- You won't.
179
00:07:16,230 --> 00:07:18,570
Not with a three-time
collegiate champ
180
00:07:18,570 --> 00:07:19,570
in your corner.
181
00:07:19,570 --> 00:07:22,070
Now give me those cards.
182
00:07:22,070 --> 00:07:25,840
You don't need these
or this silly hat.
183
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:39,090
- Hey, Takoda.
184
00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:41,990
Need any help?
185
00:07:41,990 --> 00:07:43,290
- Sure, Gabby.
Can you help me chop?
186
00:07:43,290 --> 00:07:44,590
- Yeah.
187
00:07:44,590 --> 00:07:45,830
I love chopping.
188
00:07:45,830 --> 00:07:46,890
Chop, chop.
189
00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:48,530
Chop o'clock.
190
00:07:48,530 --> 00:07:50,530
On it.
191
00:07:51,830 --> 00:07:55,000
You know, carrots can
improve your eyesight.
192
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,270
- And your soup.
193
00:07:57,270 --> 00:08:00,010
- So true.
194
00:08:00,010 --> 00:08:02,740
Question for you.
195
00:08:02,740 --> 00:08:04,980
Are you as worried about
our friendship as I am?
196
00:08:07,080 --> 00:08:08,080
- Why would you ask that?
197
00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:09,680
- Well, I'm sorry, I just--
198
00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:11,120
I have to be honest.
199
00:08:11,120 --> 00:08:12,850
We used to be solid.
200
00:08:12,850 --> 00:08:14,090
Like a rock.
201
00:08:14,090 --> 00:08:16,890
Or Emmett's forearms.
202
00:08:16,890 --> 00:08:20,660
But lately, I'm just not sure
where your loyalty lies.
203
00:08:23,700 --> 00:08:25,600
- I apologize.
204
00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:26,970
Maybe I've been distant.
205
00:08:26,970 --> 00:08:30,300
My wife says
I do that sometimes.
206
00:08:30,310 --> 00:08:31,770
- Well, don't sweat it.
207
00:08:31,770 --> 00:08:33,170
I know you've got a lot
on your plate.
208
00:08:33,170 --> 00:08:35,340
Even more now that I've done
all this chopping.
209
00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:38,810
Everything will be fine
once you just
210
00:08:38,810 --> 00:08:41,150
vote to make me the new emcee.
211
00:08:41,150 --> 00:08:44,020
- No, that wouldn't be fair
to you or Bobbie.
212
00:08:44,020 --> 00:08:47,190
- Well, it would be
if Bobbie didn't know.
213
00:08:47,190 --> 00:08:48,990
- Aha!
214
00:08:48,990 --> 00:08:50,790
Busted!
215
00:08:50,790 --> 00:08:52,260
I can't believe
you're trying to get
216
00:08:52,260 --> 00:08:55,800
Takoda to compromise his
sacred duty as comedy judge.
217
00:08:55,800 --> 00:08:58,330
Where's your integrity?
218
00:08:58,330 --> 00:09:00,370
- It ran away with yours.
219
00:09:00,370 --> 00:09:02,940
To Hypocrite Island.
220
00:09:02,940 --> 00:09:06,710
This is just like when you
asked Emmett for his vote.
221
00:09:06,710 --> 00:09:07,810
- How did you know that?
222
00:09:07,810 --> 00:09:11,880
- I didn't, until just now!
223
00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:14,080
- Does she know that you've
got Isabella to help coach you?
224
00:09:15,220 --> 00:09:17,920
- Do you know you're not part
of this conversation?
225
00:09:17,920 --> 00:09:21,260
- Oh, so you couldn't
go at it alone, huh?
226
00:09:21,260 --> 00:09:24,060
I must really have you rattled.
227
00:09:24,060 --> 00:09:25,230
- I don't rattle.
228
00:09:25,230 --> 00:09:26,860
I roll.
229
00:09:32,830 --> 00:09:35,070
- Can you believe she
went to Isabella for help?
230
00:09:35,070 --> 00:09:36,640
How pathetic.
231
00:09:36,640 --> 00:09:39,040
- We can't let this
party divide us.
232
00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:41,710
It's the opposite of what
Happy would have wanted.
233
00:09:41,710 --> 00:09:43,710
- Yes, of course.
Exactly. Well said.
234
00:09:47,150 --> 00:09:48,180
Come on.
235
00:09:48,180 --> 00:09:50,120
A French fry joke?
236
00:09:51,820 --> 00:09:54,060
Oh, shoot, it's good.
237
00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:57,420
Did you hear any of that?
238
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,790
- No, unlike you,
I don't press my ears
239
00:09:59,790 --> 00:10:02,000
to unsanitary surfaces.
240
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:04,730
- Isabella is in there
helping Bobbie.
241
00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:06,000
OK, that is not playing fair.
242
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,800
- And you're telling me
this because?
243
00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:09,270
- Because I know
that you used to help
244
00:10:09,270 --> 00:10:10,340
Happy with his material.
245
00:10:10,340 --> 00:10:12,210
In secret.
246
00:10:12,210 --> 00:10:15,110
- He told me he would
take that to the grave.
247
00:10:15,110 --> 00:10:16,740
How do you know that?
248
00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:19,010
Are you doing seances again?
249
00:10:19,010 --> 00:10:21,980
- Yeah, but that's not
how I know.
250
00:10:21,980 --> 00:10:25,750
There was a certain Steve-ness
to Happy's roasts, you know.
251
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:28,890
Good-natured with
just a dash of harm.
252
00:10:28,890 --> 00:10:32,760
- I'm flattered you
noticed my duality.
253
00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:34,230
- So will you help me?
254
00:10:34,230 --> 00:10:35,330
- It depends.
255
00:10:35,330 --> 00:10:37,130
Why is this important to you?
256
00:10:38,730 --> 00:10:42,170
- Because I have never won
a competition in my whole life.
257
00:10:42,170 --> 00:10:44,100
I used to think it was
because I'm not competitive,
258
00:10:44,110 --> 00:10:46,680
but my mom told me
it's because I suck.
259
00:10:49,740 --> 00:10:53,080
You know, I have
never made her laugh.
260
00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:54,180
Not once.
261
00:10:55,450 --> 00:10:58,020
- I'm in.
262
00:10:58,020 --> 00:10:59,150
- Yes!
263
00:10:59,150 --> 00:11:01,060
OK, so I thought I would start
with just a little bit--
264
00:11:01,060 --> 00:11:03,820
- Uh, uh, uh.
265
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,230
If we're working together,
266
00:11:06,230 --> 00:11:07,930
there is one rule.
267
00:11:07,930 --> 00:11:11,930
You have to do
exactly what I say.
268
00:11:11,930 --> 00:11:13,500
- I mean, is that necessary?
269
00:11:13,500 --> 00:11:15,240
- You want to be a winner?
- Yes.
270
00:11:15,240 --> 00:11:16,200
- Then hear and obey.
271
00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:17,910
- Oh.
272
00:11:17,910 --> 00:11:19,340
- Give me your first joke.
- Oh.
273
00:11:19,340 --> 00:11:20,770
Yes, sir.
274
00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:22,280
I started bartending--
275
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:24,110
- Too slow.
276
00:11:24,110 --> 00:11:25,210
Pace.
277
00:11:25,210 --> 00:11:26,280
Again.
278
00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:27,210
- I started bartending here--
279
00:11:27,220 --> 00:11:28,250
- Too fast.
280
00:11:28,250 --> 00:11:30,750
Where is the rhythm?
281
00:11:30,750 --> 00:11:32,350
Again.
- I started bartending--
282
00:11:32,350 --> 00:11:33,520
- Again.
- I started bartending--
283
00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:34,520
- Again!
- I started bartending here--
284
00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:36,490
- Again!
Higher.
285
00:11:36,490 --> 00:11:39,230
- I started bartending--
- Lower.
286
00:11:39,230 --> 00:11:40,260
- I started bartending here--
- Physically lower.
287
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:47,170
- Bah bah bah bah bah
bah bah bah bah?
288
00:11:48,900 --> 00:11:50,240
Bah bah bah.
289
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:51,270
Bah bah.
290
00:11:54,780 --> 00:11:56,040
Hilarious.
291
00:11:57,810 --> 00:11:59,110
- What's with the code?
292
00:11:59,110 --> 00:12:00,850
You worried about somebody
stealing your material?
293
00:12:00,850 --> 00:12:02,020
- Oh, of course not.
294
00:12:02,020 --> 00:12:03,450
We're all family here.
295
00:12:03,450 --> 00:12:05,120
- Hi, guys.
296
00:12:08,290 --> 00:12:10,390
I don't need to
see your "jokes."
297
00:12:10,390 --> 00:12:12,560
I've been working with Bobbie
on her delivery,
298
00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:14,290
and she's got this in the bag.
299
00:12:14,300 --> 00:12:16,260
- Oh, no,
I forgot all the times
300
00:12:16,260 --> 00:12:18,430
Bobbie told stories
so uproarious,
301
00:12:18,430 --> 00:12:19,930
we laughed till we cried.
302
00:12:19,930 --> 00:12:23,370
Oh, wait, that never happened.
303
00:12:23,370 --> 00:12:24,940
- Have you forgotten
that you're dealing
304
00:12:24,940 --> 00:12:26,440
with a psychology major?
305
00:12:26,440 --> 00:12:29,080
I know that confident facade
is covering the fact
306
00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:31,850
that you're actually
shaking in your boots.
307
00:12:31,850 --> 00:12:33,810
- I don't wear boots.
308
00:12:33,820 --> 00:12:35,280
They're germ buckets.
309
00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:41,360
Let's put a little wager
on who's going to win this.
310
00:12:41,360 --> 00:12:43,360
- Brilliant idea.
311
00:12:43,360 --> 00:12:45,490
You should have to put your
money where your mouth is.
312
00:12:45,490 --> 00:12:47,230
- Great.
What's the bet?
313
00:12:47,230 --> 00:12:49,030
- That's it.
314
00:12:49,030 --> 00:12:52,100
If Bobbie wins,
you have to put your money
315
00:12:52,100 --> 00:12:54,540
where your mouth is
316
00:12:54,540 --> 00:12:56,840
and kiss a dollar bill.
317
00:12:59,170 --> 00:13:00,940
Mwah.
318
00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:04,510
- I'll take that bet.
319
00:13:04,510 --> 00:13:06,950
'Cause the only thing
my confidence is covering
320
00:13:06,950 --> 00:13:08,620
is more confidence.
321
00:13:08,620 --> 00:13:10,120
- Mm-hmm.
322
00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:13,450
Professor Reese would
call that deflecting.
323
00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:16,060
- I'm afraid to ask,
but what if Gabby wins?
324
00:13:16,060 --> 00:13:19,430
- When Gabby wins,
Isabella cannot mention
325
00:13:19,430 --> 00:13:21,400
having gone to college
326
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:25,500
for a whole entire day.
327
00:13:26,630 --> 00:13:28,500
- You two are out for blood.
328
00:13:28,500 --> 00:13:31,070
- Game on!
329
00:13:31,070 --> 00:13:32,270
- Yeah, you're running.
330
00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:34,940
You're running
because you're scared.
331
00:13:34,940 --> 00:13:37,540
- I'm not the first person to
run when you were behind them.
332
00:13:37,550 --> 00:13:39,410
- Oh, hilarious.
333
00:13:39,410 --> 00:13:40,910
- Enough!
334
00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:42,920
This competition is
tearing us apart.
335
00:13:42,920 --> 00:13:44,390
- I agree.
336
00:13:44,390 --> 00:13:46,490
And it's her fault.
337
00:13:46,490 --> 00:13:48,560
You know, when you point
your finger at somebody,
338
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:52,490
you have three fingers
pointing back at you.
339
00:13:52,490 --> 00:13:53,590
- Oh, wow, she's right.
340
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:55,330
Look at that, huh.
341
00:13:55,330 --> 00:13:58,030
- In the spirit of Happy's
Place, can't one of you
342
00:13:58,030 --> 00:13:59,670
just step aside
for the other one?
343
00:13:59,670 --> 00:14:02,540
- Aw,
that's a lovely suggestion.
344
00:14:02,540 --> 00:14:03,570
How about it, Gabby?
345
00:14:03,570 --> 00:14:07,010
Are you ready to step aside?
346
00:14:07,010 --> 00:14:09,580
- Oh, Bobbie,
you know that normally
347
00:14:09,580 --> 00:14:12,150
I would do anything for you.
348
00:14:12,150 --> 00:14:16,680
But the truth is, there's
a lot of things I can't do.
349
00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:18,490
Parallel park.
350
00:14:20,490 --> 00:14:23,690
Anything tennis.
351
00:14:23,690 --> 00:14:27,360
But every night, I stay up
and I watch those late night
352
00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:30,000
TV hosts,
and I whisper to myself--
353
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:33,470
Gabby, you could do that.
354
00:14:35,570 --> 00:14:39,210
And if I could do that here,
well, I mean,
355
00:14:39,210 --> 00:14:43,510
it would just validate
my entire existence.
356
00:14:45,150 --> 00:14:47,410
- Bobbie,
I guess it's up to you.
357
00:14:47,420 --> 00:14:49,180
- Oh, Gabby.
358
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:53,550
I have to say, no.
359
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:58,530
Look, this night always
belonged to--
360
00:14:58,530 --> 00:15:01,500
our daddy.
361
00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:04,030
Isabella never
got to see him shine.
362
00:15:04,030 --> 00:15:06,370
But maybe, just maybe,
through me,
363
00:15:06,370 --> 00:15:10,570
she'll be able to get a glimpse
of his light.
364
00:15:10,570 --> 00:15:13,510
- Daddy, is that you?
365
00:15:13,510 --> 00:15:15,280
- Oh, come on.
366
00:15:17,610 --> 00:15:21,750
- This is gonna be
an impossible decision.
367
00:15:21,750 --> 00:15:23,420
- No.
368
00:15:23,420 --> 00:15:24,550
No, it's not.
369
00:15:24,550 --> 00:15:27,090
You can't win a comedy
competition with a sob story.
370
00:15:27,090 --> 00:15:29,120
- I guess it comes down to,
would you rather
371
00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:32,430
see me kiss a dollar
or have an entire day
372
00:15:32,430 --> 00:15:37,170
where Isabella doesn't remind
us she's a psychology major?
373
00:15:48,580 --> 00:15:51,350
- Don't you think we should
be clear-headed for this?
374
00:15:51,350 --> 00:15:54,080
- I asked myself
that same question.
375
00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:58,150
I answered it
about five beers ago.
376
00:15:58,150 --> 00:16:01,690
- I don't feel comfortable
judging others.
377
00:16:01,690 --> 00:16:04,060
Didn't one of your great
teachers say, "Judge not,
378
00:16:04,060 --> 00:16:05,430
lest ye be judged"?
379
00:16:05,430 --> 00:16:06,760
- Yeah.
380
00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:10,060
He's got a lot of stuff.
381
00:16:10,070 --> 00:16:12,430
We use it as we need it.
382
00:16:12,430 --> 00:16:14,070
Let's get this show
on the road.
383
00:16:14,070 --> 00:16:15,740
Gabby, you're up!
384
00:16:15,740 --> 00:16:17,270
- OK, this is it.
385
00:16:17,270 --> 00:16:18,710
I can do this.
- Mm-hmm.
386
00:16:18,710 --> 00:16:19,770
- You believe in me, right?
387
00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:21,380
- Here's what I believe.
388
00:16:21,380 --> 00:16:23,580
I believe this moment
defines who you are,
389
00:16:23,580 --> 00:16:26,750
and you must conquer it,
or it will conquer you.
390
00:16:26,750 --> 00:16:28,450
I believe you got one chance,
391
00:16:28,450 --> 00:16:32,720
one shot to prove
you are not garbage.
392
00:16:34,620 --> 00:16:36,220
- Holy crap.
393
00:16:36,220 --> 00:16:37,760
Is that from an Eminem song?
394
00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:41,760
- That's how my father dropped
me off at elementary school.
395
00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:43,700
- Oh, my God.
396
00:16:43,700 --> 00:16:46,300
Your dad is my mom.
397
00:16:46,300 --> 00:16:48,140
- That's why I decided
to help you.
398
00:16:48,140 --> 00:16:49,500
Duh.
399
00:16:50,370 --> 00:16:52,640
- This whole thing
just makes me sad.
400
00:16:52,640 --> 00:16:54,540
I'm sorry, Emmett.
401
00:16:54,540 --> 00:16:56,710
I won't choose
between my friends.
402
00:16:59,680 --> 00:17:03,150
- Speaking of choosing friends,
I pick Tall Kathy, huh?
403
00:17:03,150 --> 00:17:04,620
Ever since Short Kathy
got divorced,
404
00:17:04,620 --> 00:17:06,790
not fun, am I right?
405
00:17:06,790 --> 00:17:09,360
- Uh-oh, she's good.
406
00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:10,760
- What are you talking about?
407
00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:12,330
Emmett hasn't laughed once.
408
00:17:12,330 --> 00:17:13,690
- Didn't you hear him go "pft"?
409
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:17,170
That's Emmett's version
of rolling in the aisle.
410
00:17:18,370 --> 00:17:20,670
- We're not concerned with
what Gabby is doing, OK?
411
00:17:20,670 --> 00:17:23,270
Our only focus is
what you'll be doing.
412
00:17:23,270 --> 00:17:24,670
- Oh, dang it!
413
00:17:24,670 --> 00:17:26,140
He did another "pft."
414
00:17:26,140 --> 00:17:27,570
She's killing it up there.
415
00:17:27,580 --> 00:17:29,680
- Bobbie, Bobbie, listen to me.
416
00:17:29,680 --> 00:17:30,710
- Yeah?
417
00:17:30,710 --> 00:17:32,580
- You're ready for this, OK?
418
00:17:32,580 --> 00:17:34,720
You just have to remember
the two things we went over
419
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:37,350
again and again and again
because they make
420
00:17:37,350 --> 00:17:38,690
the whole presentation work--
421
00:17:38,690 --> 00:17:43,490
emotional journey mapping
and tempo variability.
422
00:17:43,490 --> 00:17:45,830
- This might be a little late
to tell you this,
423
00:17:45,830 --> 00:17:49,230
but I don't know
what that means.
424
00:17:49,230 --> 00:17:50,500
- Bobbie!
425
00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:51,470
You're up!
426
00:17:51,470 --> 00:17:53,470
- OK.
- Crap.
427
00:17:59,810 --> 00:18:02,310
- You know, that was
a pretty cheap laugh,
428
00:18:02,310 --> 00:18:04,310
pretending you
couldn't even remember
429
00:18:04,310 --> 00:18:06,610
the name of the tavern.
430
00:18:06,610 --> 00:18:08,580
- I wasn't going
for a cheap laugh.
431
00:18:08,580 --> 00:18:09,720
I froze.
432
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:11,190
I actually couldn't
remember the name
433
00:18:11,190 --> 00:18:12,150
of the place for a second.
434
00:18:12,150 --> 00:18:13,190
- Oh, sure.
435
00:18:13,190 --> 00:18:15,460
Seriously.
436
00:18:15,460 --> 00:18:17,290
What's really bad, it's--
437
00:18:17,290 --> 00:18:21,330
happens to be the same name
as my daddy.
438
00:18:21,330 --> 00:18:22,860
- You might have to teach me
that little trick.
439
00:18:22,860 --> 00:18:25,530
I would love to forget
the name of my mom.
440
00:18:25,530 --> 00:18:26,830
- Pft!
441
00:18:26,840 --> 00:18:29,600
- Well, if we're talking
about cheap laughs,
442
00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:34,310
your nicknames for the staff
bit was low-hanging fruit.
443
00:18:34,310 --> 00:18:35,610
- What are you mad about?
444
00:18:35,610 --> 00:18:37,910
I didn't make one up for you.
445
00:18:37,910 --> 00:18:39,610
- What about "Red Thunder"?
446
00:18:39,610 --> 00:18:40,950
That's what you call me
around here sometimes, right?
447
00:18:40,950 --> 00:18:43,220
- Pft.
448
00:18:43,220 --> 00:18:45,350
- Not to your face.
449
00:18:47,390 --> 00:18:48,960
- Actually,
I don't mind that one.
450
00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:53,790
When Daddy'd get mad at me, he
used to call me "Crimson Turd."
451
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:55,760
- Pft.
452
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:58,530
- OK, what could possibly
be taking so long?
453
00:18:58,530 --> 00:19:00,900
Gabby clearly won this,
hands down.
454
00:19:00,900 --> 00:19:02,240
- Oh, please.
455
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,240
Insult humor is so easy.
456
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:05,640
Where'd you get that sweater,
457
00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:08,640
Really Old Navy?
458
00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:12,250
- Hey, uh, could you both
do me a really big favor?
459
00:19:12,250 --> 00:19:13,650
- Sure.
- Of course.
460
00:19:13,650 --> 00:19:16,680
- Shut up.
461
00:19:16,690 --> 00:19:18,650
OK, I'm ready.
462
00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:24,390
This is what I think.
463
00:19:24,390 --> 00:19:26,930
Gabby, you are damn funny.
464
00:19:26,930 --> 00:19:28,930
- Yeah!
- Yes!
465
00:19:28,930 --> 00:19:33,600
You are now an alumni of
Who Gives a Crap University.
466
00:19:35,540 --> 00:19:36,940
- Thank you, Emmett.
467
00:19:36,940 --> 00:19:40,640
Um, but, you know,
468
00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:43,380
Bobbie was kind of funny, too.
469
00:19:43,380 --> 00:19:45,280
- Yes, she was.
470
00:19:45,280 --> 00:19:46,950
As a matter of fact,
she was great.
471
00:19:46,950 --> 00:19:48,780
- Yes! Ha-ha!
472
00:19:48,780 --> 00:19:51,850
Have fun making out
with George Washington.
473
00:19:54,390 --> 00:19:55,660
- Hang on, Emmett.
474
00:19:55,660 --> 00:19:56,620
I don't think I was
funnier than her.
475
00:19:56,620 --> 00:19:58,630
- You weren't.
- Oh.
476
00:20:00,930 --> 00:20:02,960
- Or vice versa.
477
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:04,600
- See?
478
00:20:04,600 --> 00:20:07,870
This is why you should have
stopped at three beers.
479
00:20:07,870 --> 00:20:10,870
- No matter how funny you two
are, you're funnier together.
480
00:20:10,870 --> 00:20:12,340
- Hm.
481
00:20:12,340 --> 00:20:13,610
- When I look out from
the kitchen
482
00:20:13,610 --> 00:20:15,380
and you two are behind the bar,
483
00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:19,580
all I see
are regular customers laughing.
484
00:20:19,580 --> 00:20:21,950
- I guess we do get
them going pretty good.
485
00:20:21,950 --> 00:20:24,690
- And I don't freeze when
I'm with you 'cause I know
486
00:20:24,690 --> 00:20:26,590
you can make anything funny.
487
00:20:26,590 --> 00:20:28,860
- Right back at you,
Red Thunder.
488
00:20:29,620 --> 00:20:33,590
You're the best,
Blonde Buzzard.
489
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:39,730
- So my choice
for this year's emcee
490
00:20:39,730 --> 00:20:43,040
would be...
491
00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:44,610
both of you.
492
00:20:44,610 --> 00:20:48,040
- Ugh, boo-hoo.
- Lame.
493
00:20:48,040 --> 00:20:50,840
- Aw, I like that.
494
00:20:50,850 --> 00:20:52,480
What do you think, Gabby?
495
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:54,820
- What do I think?
- Yeah.
496
00:20:54,820 --> 00:20:56,650
- I think your dad
would be thrilled
497
00:20:56,650 --> 00:21:00,420
{\an8}that it takes two funny people
to fill his shoes.
498
00:21:00,420 --> 00:21:02,390
{\an8}- Oh.
499
00:21:05,730 --> 00:21:06,830
{\an8}- OK.
500
00:21:06,830 --> 00:21:10,030
{\an8}But Steve still has to kiss
the dollar bill, right?
501
00:21:10,030 --> 00:21:13,800
{\an8}- You know what you can kiss?
502
00:21:13,800 --> 00:21:18,370
{\an8}- You are indeed
a wise judge, my friend.
503
00:21:18,370 --> 00:21:19,840
{\an8}Even with a buzz on.
504
00:21:21,940 --> 00:21:24,010
{\an8}all: Zing!
505
00:21:24,010 --> 00:21:25,780
{\an8}- Pft!
35323
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