Original subtitles

NARRATOR: For centuries, people have speculated

on the possible existence of a civilization

living in the center of the Earth.

Man has created countless myths

concerning trolls, underground cities

and mole men.

But could these legends have some basis in fact?

Could there be an underground empire?

And if there is,

are they planning to conquer our world?

Is there something sinister going on

in the center of the Earth?

No one can really say.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[BELL TOLLING]

MRS. WELLINGTON: You incompetent twit.

You're fired!

Look, if your son wasn't so evil...

He's sick.

Mr. Bumble will hear from me about the cost of the damages.

And you can be sure

I'll never recommend a nanny from his agency

to any of my friends.

Come, William.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[BELL RINGING]

Hello.

MISS FERRY: It didn't go well, Crystina.

Mrs. Wellington rang. My, was her kettle going.

Does Mr. Bumble know yet?

No. He was out all day.

Well, at least I can resign before he fires me.

Don't be too hard on yourself, Crystina.

Mrs. Wellington's gone through many governesses before you.

At least you're still alive.

It's not just that, Miss Ferry.

I'm not just cut out to be a proper nanny.

I mean, Mr. Bumble sent me out five times prior,

and each time I failed.

I'm just not nanny material, I'm afraid.

Give it one more chance, Crystina.

I'd love to, Miss Ferry.

Being a nanny was all I've ever wanted to be.

Ever since I was a young girl.

But I'll just have to face it. I'm just not any good.

What will you do then?

Teach karate, I suppose.

[PHONE RINGING]

Nannies R Us.

Nannies for all occasions, may I help you?

MAN [OVER PHONE]: Hey. My name is Mattie Asher,

and I'm personal manager to a lot of big stars.

I need a nanny to fly to Hawaii today for a client of mine.

It's little Bernard, he needs to be cared for.

MISS FERRY: Who was caring for little Bernard?

Oh, he had a nanny.

She got torn apart by five pit bulls.

Well, can you help me out and ship a nanny to Hawaii?

What will you require in her?

She's gotta be British and cheap.

I have the perfect nanny for you, Mr. Asher.

No.She'll be leaving

for Hawaii today.

Oh, no.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

MAN [OVER TV]: Now you're seeing a live shot by a helicopter high in the sky

of the recently erupted crater on Kalani

which erupted last week

with a velocity of 200 miles per hour.

Just proving once again Mother Nature--

Hey, I was watching that.

Leave it alone, Bryan.

[BRYAN GROWLS THEN SARA SCREAMS]

Enough, children!

That's it! I'm throwing you to the apes.

There are no apes in Hawaii.

Yes, there are. Are not.

You wanna be the first to find out?

[SARA SCREAMING]

Stop it. Aah!

Stop it! Stop it!

[SARA SCREAMS]

BRYAN: No, wait. SARA: Stop it. Aah!

WOMAN: Miss, can I help you?

Oh, Billy Foul, please.

Room 607. Thanks.

[MAN SNORING]

♪♪ KPOI Hawaii ♪♪

DJ [OVER RADIO]: Hey, I hate to interrupt the fun, music lovers,

but here's an emergency announcement.

Kilauea is giving off signs

that it might erupt at any moment.

Tourists are warned to stay clear

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

and inhabitants of the slopes are being evacuated.

Volcano Park is of course closed until further notice.

And speaking of closings, don't miss the exciting...

Lindy? Lindy?

...tonight at 9:00 at the Surf City Shangri-la.

All right. All right.

[DJ CONTINUES SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

[KNOCKS ON DOOR CONTINUE]

Yeah, all right.

...special guest, Billy Foul. Hurry up and buy those tickets

because it'll probably be your last chance

to see some of these great performances.

And now, for the...

[BILLY COUGHING]

Yeah.

Mr. Foul?

I'm Crystina, the nanny you requested.

Oh, come in, come in.

[BILLY RETCHING]

[MUSIC PLAYING OVER RADIO]

[BILLY GROANING]

Oh, dear.

Is Bernard here?

Are you really a nanny?

Yes, I am.

I have my papers here to present.

You don't look like a nanny.

You don't look like one of my fans.

Sorry, Mr. Foul, but I've never actually heard of you before.

You-- Well, that's the trouble. That is the trouble.

Eight months ago, I was headed for the top.

Now I'm doing a revival concert

here in tropical rock.

What happened, Mr. Foul?

[COUGHING]

Oh, call me Billy.

Uh, I don't know what happened.

People stopped buying my records.

They stopped coming to my concerts.

I suppose this concert is my last chance.

If I don't catch on and get that record deal,

I'll have to retire.

Go back to what I was doing before.

What was that?Teaching karate.

You did want a nanny, didn't you?

Now, look.

Bernard needs a bath.

So I want you to take him over to this place.

Mr. Foul, this is for a dog bath.

So? Bernard is a dog.

Aren't you? Come along.

There's a good boy.

Yes. And there we go.

Sit, sit.

There's a good boy.

Take those and cover you up.

There's a good check. Yeah.

Now, hotel security is very tight.

So always keep him well covered up.

The staff will freak if they see him.

What's in that one?

Dog biscuits. In case Bernard gets hungry.

All right, there you are.

What's the matter?

I'm a nanny to a dog?

Well, dogs need care too.

Now, there you go.

Now, remember, always keep him out of the sun.

He hates daylight.

He's just like his daddy.

Well, go on then. Off you go.

RICHARD: Bryan, leave your sister alone.

Stop it, you idiot.

You're freaking her out.Aah!

Sara, are you okay?

Sara? Is she dead?

No, of course not. Sara?

Why are you hitting her if she's not dead?

Sar-- Quiet.

What's the ma--? Sara, wh--?

Maybe she's brain dead.

You realize you ruined her chances

of being an Olympic diver. You know that, don't you?

I gotta get out of here. Me too.

Man, I should have went to Lauderdale with Lisa.

[GROANS]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

Can I help you?

Can you get me a taxi, please?

Sure.

Mom, Dad. Surprise.

Well, hello, Richard. Where are you kids going?

I'm going for a ride.

MOM: Oh, that's nice. Richard.

We're going swimming.

That's nice, Bryan.

[BERNARD GROWLS THEN CRYSTINA COUGHS]

I've got a frog my throat.

Sounds more like a dog.

BRYAN: Mom.Mm-hm.

Don't go too far.

Remember, we're having dinner together tonight!

Help. There's a big tip in it for you.

Will you get out of here?

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

RICHARD: Get me to the cave.

Sara?

Put it on my bill, will you?

Ow!Watch where you're going.

Move your bloody Jeep.English, huh? Really.

Where's my basket?

MAN: Didn't you want it in the Jeep?

Idiot.

You idiot.

Follow that Jeep.

Boo!

I was wondering when you were gonna get here.

You're going to the cave? Just like every year.

But I thought they closed the park.

Since when did that stop us? You too?

Oh, what's the matter, huh?

Don't worry, the bad volcano is on the other island.

Now, sit down and hold on, okay?

We're here.

Come on, come on, come on.

Let's go.

Oh, shit. Someone's coming. Hurry up!

What--?

You?

You took my basket, thank you.

What basket? The baby's basket.

Right here.

You feed your baby dog biscuits, do you?

They're not dog biscuits, they're mine.

And it's not my baby.

He's my brother.

[SIGHS]

Now what are you doing?

Can you take me back now, please?

You? I'm not taking you anywhere.

But I can't stay here. The taxi left.

Next time, tell him to leave the meter running.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

My name is Crystina, by the way.

I'm Bryan. That's my sister, Sara.

And yours?RICHARD: Ringo.

[BERNARD GROWLS]

RICHARD: Ta-da.

I told you we should've taken a left back there.

Here is the cave.

But it's just more rock.

Come on in.

You need help you with that?No, thank you.

Fine.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

RICHARD: Don't go down too far, sweet pea.

CRYSTINA: Here you are in one of the most beautiful places in the world,

and you bring us to a cave.

RICHARD: Oh, you'll change your mind as soon as eyes adjust.

How do you know about this place?

I found it when I was Bryan's age.

BRYAN: We come to Hawaii every Christmas.

CRYSTINA: So you're not from here?

BRYAN: Of course not. No one's from Hawaii.

Well, my eyes have adjusted.

It looks the same to me.

You can take me back now.

[BERNARD WHIMPERING]

Leave it alone, please.

BRYAN: Ha! Some baby.RICHARD: A dog.

Your brother's a dog? He's not my brother.

Your sister?

[CRYSTINA SIGHS]

I'm a nanny.

They didn't tell me until I got here.

Why you keep him in a basket?

The people I work for are very particular

that he be kept comfortable and out of the sun.

Bernard! Bernard, come back here!

SARA: Richard!

Sara?

Sara?

Don't go any further!

What's the matter?

Are you afraid to go after her yourself?

No.Then go and get my dog.

I want to go back.

Listen, lovesy, I'm not your butler.

And you're certainly not a gentlemen either.

What about your sister?

Yeah.

Wait, I'm coming too.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

CRYSTINA: God! This is just like the Alps.

BRYAN: Magic Mountain.

Thank you.

[BERNARD WHIMPERING]

Sara.

They have earthquakes in this part of the country?

I guess they have anything this far down.

Sara.

Hey, wait a minute. Look at this.

Something's written here.

It must be some of your American graffiti.

No, no, it can't be.

I've never seen anything like this before.

I think it's pointing somewhere.

Are you an expert on graffiti then?

Maybe it's a dinosaur print.

No, definitely human.

Someone's chiseled at it.

Looks like erosion to me.

Most volcanoes are igneous, you know.

They pay you to teach the dog to answer that?

Just part of a good English education.

Well, leave it in England, tea bag.

Oh, boy. Everyone under the ledge. Come on, move, move.

[EXPLOSION]

[BERNARD BARKING]

Let's go.

Jump, will you? Ugh.

Bryan, take Sara. Me next.

RICHARD: Sara, go get help!

Run, Sara, run!

I'll go get help!

[CRYSTINA SCREAMING]

RICHARD: I think Sarah will find some help.

Help!

Come on down!

I can't!

I'm stuck!

You're not stuck! Just let go!

Just fall, we'll catch you!

[SCREAMS]

God, you fall heavy.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

Hey! I think I found the way!

[CRYSTINA SCREAMING]

[BATS SQUEAKING]

I'm coming! Hang on!

Crystina, are you down here?

Crystina? Ay!

[RICHARD GRUNTING]

What are you doing down here?

Are you all right?

I think one bit me.

Probably just a scratch.

Do you see anything?

No.

Look.

What is it?

Must be another dinosaur print.

Hey, it's pointing to the waterfall.

RICHARD: Whoever left this must've come this way too.

BRYAN: You think we'll find them?

Do we want to?

Let's go.Go-- Where?

CRYSTINA & BRYAN: Down. Down? Are you nuts?

Someone else must have done it. It must lead to a way out.

Look, what if Mom and Dad come looking?

We'll leave them a note.

Well?

Let's do it.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

I'll handle this.

RICHARD: As long as we follow the stream, we'll always find our way back.

Stay close, Bernard.

BRYAN: Stay close, Bernard.

Why do you keep doing that?

When I get back, I want something to show

for all the trouble you're putting me through.

Moi?

Make me some copies for my term paper.

Not in your life. I'm sending these to the Daily Mirror.

Watch where you're pointing that thing.

Mind where you're looking.

[CRYSTINA SCREAMS]

RICHARD: Come on. Ugh.

CRYSTINA: Oh.

Hey, kid.

You okay?Yeah.

Huh?

Richard, why are the walls glowing?

Bioluminescence.

It's how fish see at the bottom of the ocean.

Biology 101.

No, I read it on a box of Cheerios.

Or Cocoa Puffs, I think.

RICHARD: Why don't we all get some sleep so we'll be well rested

when the National Guard gets here in the morning.

Go to sleep, Bryan.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[GROWLING]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

BRYAN: Oh, my God.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[GUNFIRE]

[ROARING]

RICHARD: Hold on everybody, this is it. Going for a ride.

We did it, Bryan.

[ALL CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]

CRYSTINA: You saved us.

[INDISTINCT CHATTERING CONTINUES]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

CRYSTINA: Aren't we going to try and escape?

If we're gonna spend the rest of our lives together,

we got to make the best of it.

Together? You and I down here forever?

Don't be stupid.

[SQUEAKING]

What? Oh.

It's a puddy cat.

See? Huh?

You're not too far from home.

Oh. Here.

I just wanna go home.

Don't worry, we're gonna get out of here.

Even if I have to dig a hole to China,

we're gonna get out of here.

[SIGHS]

[CLEARS THROAT]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

When I was a kid, not much older than Sarah,

my daddy built me a tree house. Except that he was really busy,

so I had to find a way to get up there myself.

Then Bryan wanted to come up in the tree house.

I wouldn't help because I was with my friends,

and I had a thing about being brothers and--

So my dad would sit me down and he'd say,

"You know, you brother's too small to get in that tree house.

You're gonna have to help him." He used to say, "See this?

That one finger right there,

you can just break it really easy.

But two of them,

two of them together, you can't break it.

You can't break it."

You understand, huh?

So I still got a hand.

But I wish I could take you to that tree house now.

Take you there, away from all this.

You just did.

You have beautiful eyes.

[SCREAMS]

Shit. Now what?

Aah! Snakes!

They're not snakes. They're just big worms.

Oh. I say we go back now!

We can't unless you have an elevator.

Then let's go down.

Get off of me.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

Bryan, give me the canteen.

It's empty.

We can stop and refill it.

Oh, no, we've lost the stream.

We couldn't have.

I saw it this morning.Has it been that long?

[GRUNTS]

So, what do you suggest we do now?

RICHARD: He's got the right idea.

Maybe we should just get some rest.

Too bad he can't find water.

Wait. Baby want a drink?

Bryan, have you still got his empty bottle?

BRYAN: Yeah.Give it to me, quick.

It's all gone. There's no more.

[WHIMPERS] No more.

Baby find his own.

Come on.

[BERNARD BARKING]

See?RICHARD: Hang on.

BRYAN: Maybe it's just a gopher.

Let's find out. Bryan, let me have the knife.

And get it dirty?

Just hand it over.

What do you wanna do, break the blade?

There's no water under there, man.

It could be underground.I thought we were underground.

We're probably right under the ocean by now.

[RUMBLING]

Something's moving in there.

Maybe it is a gopher.

A big one.

[GRUNTING]

No, it's warm. It's warm.

[GURGLING]

Aah!CRYSTINA: Aah!

[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

Quick, Crystina, get a picture!

It's just steam!

Look! It's turning into water!

We can drink it now!

BRYAN: Yeah!

[BERNARD BARKING]

Did you want to say something?

You have the most dog I've ever seen.

I mean, the nicest dog I've ever seen.

He's not mine. I mean--

Yeah.

You-- You taught him, though?

I mean, how to be nice. I met him the day I met you.

So I know you both about the same.

Can't you take a compliment?

[SIGHS]

[GURGLING]

Bryan, what is your brother doing?

He's brushing his teeth.

Next.

[MEN INDISTINCTLY SPEAKING]

What's that?

What's what?

I heard something.

I think you're just getting used to the sound of my echo.

No. It was prettier than that.

[MEN CONTINUE SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

I hear it too.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

I think we're just imagining this.

Come on.

But we just got here. I mean, it's nice.

MAN: You just gotta be careful now.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

MAN: Right there. It's right here.

Let's have a rest.

[GRUNTS]

[SIGHS]

Where's Bryan?

He's probably just reading one of his comics again.

Ow.

But he was right behind me.

Bryan.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

Bryan?

[MEN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

Bryan!

Bryan!

[BERNARD BARKING]

[CREAKING]

Richard?

RICHARD: Bryan!

[BERNARD BARKING]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

Richard!

Richard, Crystina!

[RUMBLING]

[CHUCKLING]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[RUMBLING]

[BRYAN SCREAMING]

RICHARD: Bryan![BERNARD BARKING]

Bryan!

Bryan!

MAN: There's something out there...

BRYAN: Richard, Crystina!

RICHARD: Bryan!

[BERNARD BARKING]

[RUMBLING AND BERNARD CONTINUES BARKING]

[CLANGING]

[GASPS]

Who are you?

Ha-ha-ha, who are you?

[SIGHS]

RICHARD: Bryan!

MAN: We can't be sure.

[BERNARD BARKING]

Richard.

[MEN CONTINUE SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

Red Leader, this is Red 7. I found one.

Repeat, I found one.SARA: Richard! Richard!

RICHARD: Mom, Dad, Sara.

And the National Guard.

DAD: Where's Bryan?

RICHARD: Uh, that's a good question, Dad.

CRYSTINA: Bryan!

Bryan?

[CRYSTINA SCREAMING]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[EXPLOSIONS]

MAN [OVER PA]: Visitors to Atlantis are required to report

to the nearest police checkpoint

upon their arrival.

Citizens of the great city state of Atlantis

must be prepared to show slack cards upon demand.

Lord Over has issued a statement

which reminds citizens of Atlantis

that there is no such thing as a surface world,

and rumors of the actual existence of aliens are wrong,

misleading and counterproductive

to the future of our great city state.

Anyone who thinks they may have had contact

with an alien, female or older male,

should report immediately

to General Rykov at Government House.

There is a reward.

And finally, the statement stresses once and for all,

aliens do not exist,

the surface world does not exist,

and Wanda Saknussemm is a mere figment of your imagination.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[SHANK MUMBLING]

Hey, you. Wake up.

Wake up.

What are you?

More important question, who are you?

I'm Bryan.

I'm Shank. Heh.

Do you like my home?

[BERNARD GROWLS]

[SHANK CHUCKLING]

Where am I?

SHANK: Where do you think you are?

If I knew, I wouldn't be asking.

You're in Atlantis City.

Atlantis City. Atlantis City.

New Jersey?

No.

In the center of the Earth.

Ah.

What kind of alien is this?

Um, that's a dog.

Ah.

[CHUCKLES]

Where did you say I am?

In the center of the Earth.

Center of the Earth. Right.

Um...

Look, you better explain this to me real slow.

Oh, yes. And then you can tell me something

about the surface world.

[RUMBLING]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

Bryan?

Bryan!

Bryan!

Bryan.

MAN [OVER PA]: Attention.

You are in the Atlantis wasteland restricted area.

All citizens are prohibited from entering.

I repeat, this is a restricted area.

[YAWNING]

Trespassers will be punished by death

and a large fine.

MAN 2 [OVER PA]: A reminder to all employees at Professor Galba's

transport to the surface project.

Security wishes to remind you

that any discussion of the work being done here

is strictly forbidden and punishable by death.

Thank you. Have a good day.

Let me see if I can apply a little bit

of light amplification to make this stimulate...

Oh, there you are, professor.

Ah!

You can save time

if you just do it my way, professor.

It's the modern technique for atomic recompilation.

Your style is outdated and of the Stone Age variety.

I am an old cranky professor,

and I work in an old cranky way.

Are you implying your technique and knowledge are superior

to our advanced Atlantean science, professor?

I'm saying that my method works,

but most of all this is my project!

[SNIFFING]

[FOOTSTEPS]

General Rykov.

You honor us with your presence.

Is the progress on the transport to the surface world

going well, professor?

It's progressing, general.

Are we on schedule?

We could be if Professor Galba would accept

modern scientific atomic recompilation.

It's either my way or no way.

Where's Consul Crassis?

He's in charge here. I want to speak to him.

I don't like all these changes and talks of schedules.

I never had an agreement like that with him.

He promised me freedom and funding.

Money is tight, professor.

The economy is sluggish.

And we cannot go on subsidizing your research forever.

I want to talk to Crassis.

You cannot see Crassis now.

He's having his hair done.

In Lemuria.

You'll have to deal with me now.

Well, I don't like you.

And I certainly detest him.

Why do you dislike us, professor?

What have we done to gain your animosity?

I think you're going to use my transporter to the surface

to send your army to conquer the surface of the earth.

Ridiculous. Heh-heh-heh. Ridiculous.

Then why is he trying to convince me

to make a cargo hold for all their tanks?

It will be our gift to the aliens, professor.

Now, I want this transporter completed within one month.

Or else...

General Rykov, this old man will stun us both soon.

MAN [OVER PA]: Because of the failure of his earlier news conference,

Lord Over has decided to deliver his annual

state of the city speech next week.

It's eagerly awaited as a major announcement

concerning the alien situation.

TOLA: General, Lord Over has moved up his speech.

Do you think he suspects what we're up to?

No, I think the pressure for an official response

to the rumors is forcing this speech.

We have little time left, Tola.

Do you have a good, believable alien yet?

We're close, general.

Dangerously close.

Hello.

I think I'm a bit lost.

Have I wandered into your amusement park or something?

You are an alien, aren't you, dear?

Well, yeah, I suppose I am.

But I've got a work visa

coming from the embassy next week,

so that'll be all right.

Or won't it?

Where on earth are we going?

None of this is necessary.

It's not very comfortable either.

Just relax.

TOLA: General, where do we take her?

General?

Take her to the warehouse, Tola.

I'll meet you there.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

BRYAN: Well, Atlantis does sound pretty weird.

SHANK: Oh, it's getting very weird.

I would normally sell you.

Aliens were very valuable in Atlantis

a little while ago.

But now the government arrests anyone

with any information about aliens.

It's very dangerous to have you with me.

[CHUCKLES]

So how come you're helping me and Bernard out?

I don't know. I like things from the surface world.

I collect them.

You can see my house.

I get many things from your world.

[CHUCKLES]

Fast Photo here again with yet another marvelous product

from GovCo, the corporation of your government.

We can love each other.

So hard that nothing is gonna keep us apart.

Can we make a baby?

Possible existence of aliens.

Can we go out and look at your world?

I mean, as long as I'm here, I'd like to see Atlantis.

No.

No, it's too dangerous.

SHANK: What's that?

BRYAN: Oh, it's a beach.

SHANK: It's so bright.

And all the fluid.

This is the surface world?

Yeah.

WOMAN [OVER MONITOR]: Sunrise brings a relaxing moment for the natives

before the early morning planes arrive.

[SHANK GIGGLES]

SHANK: Ah.

If I can help you find your way home

to the surface,

will you take me home with you, Bryan?

What, to my house?

Sure.

My parents are pretty cool about that stuff.

[GIGGLES]

I'll be right back.

I think I might be able to find a way to get you home.

But don't move from here, though.

It's very dangerous for you in Atlantis.

The soldiers and the fat ladies could easily find you.

Even you could have trouble with the fat ladies, Bernard.

[SHANK CHUCKLES]

[WHIRRING]

SHANK: Let's see. Is it Professor Galba

who has the machine to the surface?

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

WOMAN [OVER PA]: You are in Sector 100.

Sector 100.

A reminder that temp body converters

will be a must later today as a ripple of low pressure

will travel through the pressurized zone.

Sector 100.

Sector 100.

MAN [OVER PA]: Attention, citizens of Atlantis.

Lord Over has declared martial law

due to unrest and anarchy in the city.

All rights and liberties are suspended.

Speaking out against Lord Over or the government

is punishable by immediate death.

WOMAN [OVER PA]: Citizens, General Rykov and her police

request all citizens with slab ID clearance

to leave Sector 100.That way.

Please leave the area at once.

Failure to do so will result in your violent death.

Thank you for your cooperation.

[CROWD CHEERING]

ANNOUNCER: Tonight, we have a lineup of wretches

which is sure to satisfy your lust.

Remember,

anything goes.

But only one walks out.

Barzine. I've been looking for you.

Do you know where Professor Galba

or Colonel Atway is?

No.

CRYSTINA: Excuse me, where exactly are we?

WOMAN [OVER PA]: Executions will be the norm.

Do whatever the police request of you,

or you will be killed.

Martial law is now in effect.

Excuse me?

MAN [OVER PA]: Visitors to Atlantis are required to report

to the nearest police checkpoint upon their arrival.

Citizens of the great city state of Atlantis

must be prepared to show slack cards upon demand.

Citizens visiting from Lemuria, Middle-earth, Hades, or Asgard

must report to Government House for visas.

And please take time to learn the city's newest laws.

Your life could depend on it.

GovCo. We inform you of what we know you need to know.

[THUDDING]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]

All's well, general.

It seems that we have three subjects

who are very close in every way to the original alien,

Wanda Saknussemm.

It may not be necessary at all, supervisor.

But, general, we've worked very hard

to create a perfect duplicate.

But why duplicate when we have a real alien?

She's not an alien.

She doesn't even look like one to Saknussemm.

Nevertheless, she is still an alien.

[CHUCKLES]

You can meet me at Government House.

I'll decide on my own how I will be exposing Lord Over.

[CHUCKLES]

Go ahead, Tola.

WOMAN 1 [OVER PA]: Remember, second-class citizens,

trolls must not use respirators designated for humans.

This is punishable by death.

Thank you for your continued cooperation.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

WOMAN 2 [OVER PA]: Martial law has been declared by Lord Over.

The police have absolute authority.

Civil liberties are suspended.

Random unreasonable executions will be the norm.

Do whatever the police request of you,

or you will be killed.

Martial law is in effect.

Oh, wow. I'm bummed.

Really? I'm from L.A.

Where are we? Malibu.

Things are so weird. Bananas.

Are you bummed? I'm bummed, I'm bummed.

Wonderful.

GIRL 1: It's so weird we've met.

Are you bummed? Oh, I'm really bummed.

Ah, my dear, you have such exquisite skin

and excellent follicles.

My lunar cut will look simply smashing on you.

Now, there might be a slight minor bit of pain

when I grip it to the hairpiece to your skull.

But it will be awesome.I'm bummed.

Oh, a bit of agony and torture anyway.

It only hurts a little.

[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]

So, what are you trying to do here?

Give her the tour.

Is it wise?It's on the way to her cell.

It's your pension, Tola.

Yes.

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

The applicants are sent here by talent agents

from all over the city.

And we decide whether they are suitable.

CRYSTINA: Suitable for what?

To become exact Wanda Saknussemm replicas.

They are washed and, uh...

dressed for the transformation process.

Their skin is dyed the perfect alien shade,

and they are stretched

to Wanda Saknussemm's exact height.

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

And this is where we teach them to think and speak

like Wanda Saknussemm.

Who's Wanda Saknussemm?

And why are these girls being made to look like her?

ASSISTANT: They will be Wanda Saknussemm.

Wanda was the first alien ever to reach our world.

She became quite a tourist.

But why duplicate her?

Let's just say General Rykov is planning to save Atlantis.

General Rykov didn't exactly seem the type

to care about the welfare of the citizens.

We all have our ambitions.

Yeah, I suppose so.

I have become a bit muddled, though.

All I had to do was take Bernard for a bath.

Now I find myself in the center of the Earth,

and I haven't gotten a clue where the dog is.

What's a dog?

They're pets. They're small with big ears

and a lot of hair.

We have them here in Atlantis. We call them trolls.

She's doing that all wrong.

Am I?

Here.

GIRL 1: General Rykov is...

CRYSTINA: See.

Like that.

GIRL 2: Oh, wow, I'm bummed.

Tell me more about your world

and how you came to be here.

Well, I was searching for Bryan, this boy I met.

Well, the brother of the boy I met actually.

TOLA: He's your boyfriend?

No, just a rather strange American teenager.

I fell down a pit looking for him.

I ended up here in the center of the Earth.

Then you're not seeing anyone right now?

No.

Why are you so interested? Research.

WOMAN [OVER PA]: Citizens, General Rykov and her police

request all citizens with slab ID clearance

to leave Sector 100.

Please leave the area at once.

Failure to do so will result in your violent death.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Are you seeing anyone?

Only the general,

and she's too busy planning conquests.

General Rykov wants to conquer my world?

That's so silly.

There'll be a war.

MAN [OVER PA]: Visitors to Atlantis are required to report

to the nearest police checkpoint

upon their arrival.

Citizens of the great city state of Atlantis

must be prepared to show slack cards upon demand.

Citizens visiting from Lemuria, Middle Earth, Hades, or Asgard

must report to Government House for visas.

And please take time to learn the city's newest laws.

Your life could depend on it.

GovCo. We inform you of what we know you need to know.

WOMAN 1 [OVER PA]: Sector 100.

A reminder that temp body converters

will be a must later today,

as a ripple of low pressure will travel

through the pressurized zone.

Sector 100.

Sector 100.

WOMAN 2 [OVER PA]: Attention all boys and girls

who suffer from annoying hair lice.

Try Nice No Lice.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

I have found a friend of yours.

A girl alien named Crystina.

She's been captured by General Rykov

and the government.

Crystina.

What about my brother, Richard?

I know nothing about him.

You sure they didn't capture a quasi-hunky guy,

not terribly bright, with a real obnoxious personality?

No. No alien like that. Just the girl.

I think she's in great danger.

Let's go. Wait.

Where do you think you're going?

To save her.

Impossible. Why?

She's being kept in a secret warehouse by General Rykov

and these meanest and toughest soldiers.

And they've got many weapons.

Oh.

♪♪ You ride ♪♪

♪♪ You're rocking out You're rocking high ♪♪

[THUD]

LORD OVER: There are too many rumors about aliens existing.

Somehow I must put a stop to it.

Especially since it seems one or two

may have actually entered the city.

I believe the aliens are spies

being sent down to report on our capabilities, Lord Over.

We must mobilize for war,

and we must launch a massive retaliation.

Good.

I understand your paranoia, General Rykov.

And you could be right.

But it's important Atlantis not learn of the aliens

until the right time.

I will go on TV and insist there are no aliens.

And the smell of freshly-cut grass

and the warmth of the springtime sun.

That's what's waiting on the surface.

Beauty and peace.

Hey, lady, are all people equal? Trolls and humans?

In most of the world.

There are still places where bad people still live,

but that's all changing.

And there are no wars or fighting?

I'm afraid there's still a bit of that too.

There's a lot of hope in the future.

That's why you must come to the surface in peace.

Start the relationship off on the right foot.

There's much we can do together.

Perhaps the general is wrong.

[PHONE RINGING]

Yes?

MOLDINE: This is Moldine, down at the cloning lab.

Sir, I think we have a serious situation here.

Yes.

An alien is brainwashing Tola and the others.

Oh?

She's telling them about the surface.

No.

About how peaceful and beautiful it is.

No.

Better get down here before it's too late.

What are the chances

of going back with you, Crystina?

First, I've got to work out how to get back up.

That's no problem.

Professor Galba's transporter will get you out.

Who is going where, Tola?

What is going on here?

Crystina was just teaching us

about the surface world, general.

I have told you everything you need to know

about the surface world.

You didn't tell us about flowers

or sea breezes or butterflies.

Or like, warm summer days.

MAN: Or the temptations.

You certainly didn't tell us

about the National Basketball Association.

Enough.

RYKOV: I do not have to explain everything.

I only give orders.

Lord Over has moved his speech up again.

Chain this alien and bring her to the video chambers.

I'll use her to destroy Lord Over

to take over Atlantis.

No.

You're changing, Tola.

You're changing color.

Here, hold this.

Hey, Bryan, be careful.

This is not a problem.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

You!

Execute Tola!

Now!

But why attack us?

The people from the surface are peaceful.

[SCREAMS]

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Hyah! Hyah!

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[YELLING]

BRYAN: Hit it, Shank. Hit it.

[ROCK MUSIC BLARING]

[ALL SCREAMING]

[GUNFIRE ON TV]

[GUNFIRE CONTINUES ON TV]

MAN [OVER TV]: Please stand by for an important news bulletin.

Now, ladies and gentlemen,

live from the center of the earth,

Consul Tritan Crassis,

who, with the retirement of Lord Over, is the new--

What is he?

He's the new lord-elect of Atlantis.

[CROWD CHEERING]Consul?

We come to you in peace

and in the interest of tourism

and investment opportunities.

We feel Atlantis has much to offer you.

To open trade and communications with you,

the people of the surface,

we, the people of the center of the earth,

agree to accept as your first ambassador

Wanda Saknussemm.

Thank you.

[APPLAUSE]

We'd also like to take this opportunity to announce

that our national hero, Lieutenant Tola,

and his bride, Crystina,

will be our first ambassadors to your world.

[APPLAUSE]

To commemorate this event,

we have invited the most popular star

of our two worlds to perform a song,

especially written for the occasion.

Ladies, gentlemen,

and trolls,

Billy and the Wonders.

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪♪♪♪]