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MARNIE: I've got a dirty mind and everybody knows it.
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Fuck!
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Mind.
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MARNIE: Just scrubbing the shame off the taps,
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hoovering some regret off the carpet,
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and cleaning up the general horror of last week.
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♪ You're gonna wake up one morning ♪
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♪ As the sun greets the dawn ♪
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♪ You're gonna look around in your mind, girl ♪
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(DOOR OPENING)
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-Hi. -Hi.
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MARNIE: I cleaned the flat.
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Er, yeah. It needed it.
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Mmm.
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And I got a job.
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Well done.
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Are you gonna go to Amber's party?
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Cos we could go together.
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Seeing as you don't really know that many people.
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Probably not. Erm...
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Right, I'll maybe see you in the kitchen later.
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Er... I feel like I've hardly seen you all week.
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I've been working.
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Had to let Karen go.
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There's been a lot of interim admin.
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I'm not always nice to people.
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I said sorry.
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Can we just go back to how things were?
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Cos I'm uncomfortable enough as it is in my cupboard.
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-Er, maybe it isn't working. -No. I like the cupboard,
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and I'm not even that uncomfortable.
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I'm used to it. I sleep in a ball
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anyway and that is comforting.
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No. Erm... Maybe you should move out.
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Why?
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You said it was just until you got yourself sorted.
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It's not because of your disorder.
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(SIGHS) Well, you mentioning it
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kinda makes it seem like it is.
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Cos why would you bring it up if it's not?
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It's just like standing over a dead body and going,
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-"It wasn't me." -It's because of you.
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It's because of you and the way you are with people.
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(DOOR CLOSES)
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How I am with people, is because of my OCD.
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It makes me a shit person
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and I'm gonna be shit until I'm better.
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So, it's just like, when is that?
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Cos I've had three sessions now,
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and I thought I was gonna feel better than this.
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What do you think, "being better" means?
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I'll be a better person
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when I don't have these thoughts and wonder what they mean
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and who I am.
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The problem isn't the thoughts, though.
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It's the way they make you feel
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and the shame you have about them.
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That's why we need to find a way for you
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to have a different relationship with them.
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I don't want a relationship with them.
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I want them to go away. That's why I'm here.
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That's what I'm paying for.
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Having absurd thoughts is part of being human.
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If you got rid of them completely,
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you'd be brain-dead.
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I just want you to tell me
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when they'll stop and when I'll be better,
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so I can stop worrying about dying
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alone cos I'm such a shit person.
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Therapy is not gonna help you get rid of your thoughts.
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And the more you try to do that, the more you'll have,
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and the more distressed you'll get.
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(TEARFULLY) So, I'm always gonna have them.
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I know you're looking for a definitive answer.
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I am going to get better though.
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I'm... I'm sorry, I can't give you that.
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(CHUCKLES)
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(THUDS)
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(COUGHS)
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(MOANS)
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(WHISPERS) Hey.
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Thought you weren't staying.
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Yeah, I know. I must've just fallen asleep.
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Whoops.
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Well, that's a natural human response.
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I won't hold it against you.
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(KISSES)
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So, what shall we do?
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(GROANS) I don't know about you,
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but I'm gonna go and do a HIIT class.
91
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-I'm not doing a HIIT class. -Why? You should.
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(WHISPERS) Fuck it!
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Do you want to come to my birthday party?
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When is it?
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Today, actually.
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Birthday and party.
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(CHUCKLES) What are you doing here, man?
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Er, it was the only time you could do...
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(NANCY SIGHS)
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So, do you wanna come, or...
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Why?
102
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Cos people in London are flakes
103
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and I don't want it to be just
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me and four others staring at some fucking Gs.
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Right. Who's gonna be there?
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Loads of people. You know,
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(SIGHS) people from work, people not from work.
108
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-People from your house. -(CHUCKLES)
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(SIGHS) Yeah.
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I don't know. It's just a bit much.
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I don't want you to come.
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It's just for numbers.
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I'm asking everyone. I'm asking my colourist.
114
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But, we should catch up next week.
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(KISSES)
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Yeah. Catch up.
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CHARLIE: I thought you didn't like coffee.
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(CHUCKLES) I slept with a barista.
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Now I'm a barista.
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It's like a hipster STD.
121
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You should've stuck with him. He could've given you some tips.
122
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Since you have absolutely no idea what you're doing.
123
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-I've had half a day's training. -As what?
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As this?
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(WHISPERS) For fuck's sake.
126
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Marnie, just let me do it. It's fine, I'll do it.
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Can you just clear, please?
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And take that lady her muffin?
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Don't. I need this.
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Otherwise, I'm just another homeless Scottish person.
131
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I'm sorry. It's such a stereotype.
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You can always crash at mine if you get stuck.
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Are you sure?
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Might be a bit awkward, because
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last time you asked me over you showed me your cock.
136
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I take it back then.
137
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Are you coming to Amber's?
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Er, meant to be seeing Sarah.
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You should bring her.
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Not sure she'll be up for it.
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Really? Thought she'd love a chance
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to hang out with the kids.
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No. She'd rather stay in and have sex with me.
144
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So, does that mean you're "better"?
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Getting there, yeah.
146
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That's why you go felting.
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Menopausal women do it for you.
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They must do.
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Hope it works this time.
150
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Yeah, it will.
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It will.
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-I'll leave you to it. -Yeah. Have a good one.
153
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-I will. -Yeah, fine.
154
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See you around, then.
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MARNIE: I might have a mental disorder,
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but it's other people who have the problem.
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I just wanna be a normal 24-year-old woman,
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currently living in London.
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I'm just gonna style it out and act like nothing happened.
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Like a clumsy fall or a fanny fart.
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MARNIE: Happy birthday!
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Hey. Wow! Wow, you are really early, aren't you?
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Er, well, you said any time after 9:00,
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and it's one minute past. So, after 9:00.
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Exactly. And most people interpret
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that as 10:00, at the earliest.
167
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Also, I just wanted to check that we were okay.
168
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After the whole pastagate thing.
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I'm not thinking about your vagina. (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
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Yeah, we're, erm... We're fine.
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Did you get anything nice for your birthday?
172
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Yep. Er, cards, money
173
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and a load of comments on Facebook.
174
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So, it has been a gas.
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Well, this is from me.
176
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Aw, thanks.
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(CHUCKLES) You really wrapped it there.
178
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Yeah. It's not exciting.
179
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Cool. Perfume.
180
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Yeah, so, you don't smell like a dead old lady.
181
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No, I won't. (LAUGHS)
182
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Give it an ol' spray.
183
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-It's quite sweet. -Mmm, it's nothing.
184
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I meant the smell.
185
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It's quite a... A summery scent than a wintry one.
186
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I like it, though.
187
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You could always use it as a room spritz.
188
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(CLEARS THROAT)
189
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Did you ever have a party and then it's time for the party,
190
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and then you can't be fucking arsed with the party.
191
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Yeah.
192
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And then you have all these people in your house,
193
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you're like,
194
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"Get out of my fuckin' house."
195
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And that's if they even turn up at all.
196
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-I... I wasn't looking. -No, I know you weren't.
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(CHUCKLES)
198
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(NERVOUSLY) It's the material. What is it?
199
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-Polyester. -Looks great.
200
00:10:34,709 --> 00:10:35,876
Joe!
201
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He'll be down in a minute to talk to you.
202
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Do you wanna grab yourself a drink?
203
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I'm just gonna get some clothes on, you know.
204
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Yeah.
205
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Yeah, okay.
206
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MARNIE: So what if I imagined honking her breast?
207
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She literally does that all the time to people.
208
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At least vodka's my friend.
209
00:11:05,542 --> 00:11:05,667
JOE: Hey.
210
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(CHUCKLES)
211
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Amber says you have to talk to me.
212
00:11:13,667 --> 00:11:15,417
-Okay. -How's your foot?
213
00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:19,375
It's good. Yeah. How's your...
214
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Disorder?
215
00:11:22,375 --> 00:11:23,292
(STUTTERS) Sorry. I don't know how to...
216
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(LAUGHS) Still disordering.
217
00:11:28,918 --> 00:11:31,292
Erm, that's why,
218
00:11:32,709 --> 00:11:32,834
I couldn't,
219
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when you tried to...
220
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And, if I'd known, I wouldn't have.
221
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Right.
222
00:11:39,500 --> 00:11:40,042
Not many people would.
223
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I wouldn't.
224
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No, not cos I don't wanna know, cos I do.
225
00:11:50,042 --> 00:11:52,209
I Googled you.
226
00:11:52,500 --> 00:11:56,584
(CHUCKLES) I'm not a sheep breeder from Wick,
227
00:11:56,667 --> 00:11:58,876
I've never worked for easyJet,
228
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and I didn't die in 1847.
229
00:12:00,375 --> 00:12:02,876
Different Marnie MacAuley.
230
00:12:04,042 --> 00:12:04,626
I Googled what you have.
231
00:12:04,709 --> 00:12:06,751
Cos you wanted to look at
232
00:12:06,834 --> 00:12:09,209
stock images of distressed-looking women?
233
00:12:09,709 --> 00:12:10,792
Yeah.
234
00:12:11,042 --> 00:12:12,584
You could've just gone to a chemist and
235
00:12:12,667 --> 00:12:15,125
hung out by the cystitis sachets.
236
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I can't. There's a poster of me behind the till.
237
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(LAUGHING)
238
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Nah, I wanted to...
239
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I don't know. Educate myself
240
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and talk to you about it. If you wanted.
241
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Cos maybe you don't wanna talk. But if you do, I'm here.
242
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(LAUGHS)
243
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Thanks.
244
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If I was gonna buy a man off Amazon,
245
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I'd buy you.
246
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Great picture, good reviews...
247
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Same day delivery.
248
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(LAUGHING) I don't know what that means.
249
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AMBER: Ugh. Come on, lads. It's the food preparation area.
250
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Er, I washed my hands.
251
00:13:15,959 --> 00:13:17,876
She had something in her eye.
252
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Your tongue?
253
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(CHUCKLES)
254
00:13:32,375 --> 00:13:34,500
(REGGAE MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)
255
00:13:36,542 --> 00:13:38,876
Shit, wait. Do you have a girlfriend?
256
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No!
257
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Okay. I never know.
258
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You're on, then you're off, then you're on again.
259
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Like somebody playing with the light.
260
00:13:46,876 --> 00:13:48,459
It's off now. It's dark.
261
00:13:48,542 --> 00:13:51,667
Not dark, as in sinister. Dark, as in "it's not happening."
262
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It's like someone took the dimmer switch
263
00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:55,459
and turned it down really slowly.
264
00:13:55,542 --> 00:13:57,959
Ooh, mood lighting.
265
00:13:58,042 --> 00:14:00,000
AMBER: All right, you, come on in and give your coat to Joe.
266
00:14:00,083 --> 00:14:02,834
Oh shit.
267
00:14:02,918 --> 00:14:05,417
JOE: Don't worry about them. You're old news.
268
00:14:05,500 --> 00:14:07,751
The new one of you has a massive necklace,
269
00:14:07,834 --> 00:14:09,834
and they're obsessed by it.
270
00:14:09,918 --> 00:14:11,042
Rattles every time she moves.
271
00:14:11,292 --> 00:14:13,584
-You can hear her coming. -AMBER: Joe!
272
00:14:14,375 --> 00:14:16,042
JOE: Better go. SEF: Is he banging Moira?
273
00:14:16,125 --> 00:14:17,584
-The one with the... -No, they're just really good
274
00:14:17,667 --> 00:14:18,876
mates. So, er,
275
00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:21,542
kitchen is the bar. So, help yourselves.
276
00:14:22,250 --> 00:14:23,709
Mate, do you want some birthday cake?
277
00:14:23,792 --> 00:14:24,250
Maybe later.
278
00:14:24,334 --> 00:14:26,375
Boring.
279
00:14:27,292 --> 00:14:29,125
Have you got any good red wine?
280
00:14:29,209 --> 00:14:31,042
AMBER: Probably, yes. LIBBY: Good, though?
281
00:14:31,125 --> 00:14:33,751
AMBER: Do you know what? Let me see what I can do.
282
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:37,834
-LIBBY: Not saying hello? -Oh, my God, hi.
283
00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:42,250
Yes. I didn't see you. Yes, I'm saying hello. Hello.
284
00:14:43,209 --> 00:14:44,375
(YELPS)
285
00:14:44,626 --> 00:14:45,959
Amber told me what was wrong with you.
286
00:14:46,042 --> 00:14:50,125
Or, the more PC version of that. Whatever that is.
287
00:14:50,209 --> 00:14:51,375
Mmm. She shouldn't have done that.
288
00:14:51,626 --> 00:14:53,459
She thought I was owed an explanation.
289
00:14:53,542 --> 00:14:55,626
I'm sorry for bringing my mental health issues...
290
00:14:55,709 --> 00:14:57,959
So are you not constantly horny?
291
00:14:58,918 --> 00:15:04,167
Er, more like constantly confused and frustrated.
292
00:15:05,250 --> 00:15:07,250
You should write about it.
293
00:15:07,334 --> 00:15:09,500
-For Ethel? -Not for Ethel.
294
00:15:10,250 --> 00:15:12,584
I'm not sure you quite fitted in.
295
00:15:13,375 --> 00:15:14,709
That wasn't really me.
296
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,250
So, the drinking at work and the general misconduct.
297
00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:18,876
Who was that then?
298
00:15:21,500 --> 00:15:24,125
-AMBER: Is Rioja all right? -Haven't you got any Malbec?
299
00:15:24,209 --> 00:15:26,209
No.
300
00:15:28,250 --> 00:15:30,042
Oh, my God.
301
00:15:30,125 --> 00:15:31,918
Am I running a wine bar?
302
00:15:33,334 --> 00:15:35,417
-What? -You told her.
303
00:15:36,250 --> 00:15:39,250
And I also told her not to tell you.
304
00:15:39,334 --> 00:15:41,459
I was trying to get you a reference.
305
00:15:42,417 --> 00:15:43,876
-NANCY: Hi. -Oh, God, you came.
306
00:15:43,959 --> 00:15:46,000
-Oh, hi! Hi! -How's it going?
307
00:15:46,083 --> 00:15:47,417
AMBER: When did you get here?
308
00:15:47,751 --> 00:15:49,918
Oh, great. I have to introduce you to my...
309
00:15:52,626 --> 00:15:54,250
...you're gonna fucking love him.
310
00:15:54,334 --> 00:15:54,918
What are you drinking?
311
00:15:56,918 --> 00:15:59,125
MARNIE: This isn't me being alone.
312
00:15:59,417 --> 00:16:02,042
It's me not socialising with twats.
313
00:16:02,125 --> 00:16:05,334
I'm glad I'm peak drunk or it'd be highly embarrassing.
314
00:16:07,918 --> 00:16:10,375
Thanks for coming in... Er, round.
315
00:16:10,459 --> 00:16:11,125
No. Thank you.
316
00:16:11,918 --> 00:16:15,000
And, erm, thank you for letting me...
317
00:16:15,667 --> 00:16:18,292
Well, you know, everything.
318
00:16:18,375 --> 00:16:20,209
Feeling better about it has helped.
319
00:16:20,292 --> 00:16:22,709
I'm glad. I'm... I'm really glad.
320
00:16:22,792 --> 00:16:25,083
It's been great.
321
00:16:25,167 --> 00:16:28,334
It's been really great for me. (CHUCKLES)
322
00:16:28,417 --> 00:16:30,250
Yeah, me too.
323
00:16:30,334 --> 00:16:32,876
Why do some blokes not like...
324
00:16:35,083 --> 00:16:37,709
-It, you know? -You are generous, diligent,
325
00:16:37,792 --> 00:16:40,709
(EXHALES) punctual, polite.
326
00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:43,459
-Thank you. -Case in point.
327
00:16:43,542 --> 00:16:46,334
Erm, a bit of constructive feedback,
328
00:16:46,417 --> 00:16:48,209
though, if you're open.
329
00:16:48,292 --> 00:16:49,334
Yeah. Always.
330
00:16:49,959 --> 00:16:51,375
(WHISPERS) It's a bit same-y.
331
00:16:51,459 --> 00:16:53,584
Erm, a bit of variety wouldn't go amiss.
332
00:16:53,667 --> 00:16:55,125
I've only been round twice.
333
00:16:55,209 --> 00:16:56,792
Yeah, mix up the speed, the pressure.
334
00:16:56,876 --> 00:16:58,250
-I mean, it's not an appraisal. -Kind of is, though.
335
00:16:58,334 --> 00:17:02,792
-Like an end-of-the-week review. -More like an exit interview.
336
00:17:05,125 --> 00:17:06,000
Sorry.
337
00:17:11,500 --> 00:17:15,209
Sarah, don't do this.
338
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:18,167
(IN A CHILDISH VOICE) Sarah.
339
00:17:18,250 --> 00:17:20,918
-Sarah, don't do... -Stop it. Stop.
340
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:22,083
Sorry. Sorry.
341
00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:24,542
Erm...
342
00:17:25,125 --> 00:17:29,375
(SIGH) Can I, er, ask why?
343
00:17:29,459 --> 00:17:33,459
I'm a doer. I like... I like doing.
344
00:17:33,542 --> 00:17:35,500
And at the moment, I'm not doing much except lying there.
345
00:17:35,584 --> 00:17:39,125
And it's lovely, but it's not enough.
346
00:17:40,042 --> 00:17:43,042
Sometimes, you just want a cock.
347
00:17:44,083 --> 00:17:46,167
Sometimes you want a cock, Charlie, okay? That's it.
348
00:17:49,125 --> 00:17:53,667
(CHUCKLES) Well, you are in luck, madame.
349
00:17:55,083 --> 00:17:58,459
Because, this little thing. (CHUCKLES)
350
00:17:58,542 --> 00:18:00,626
Er, it'll take about half an hour to kick in.
351
00:18:00,709 --> 00:18:02,083
-Charlie... -Just bear with me.
352
00:18:02,167 --> 00:18:03,417
-Charlie... -Talk amongst yourselves,
353
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:04,125
and I will be...
354
00:18:04,209 --> 00:18:05,876
(EXASPERATED SIGH) Oh, Charlie.
355
00:18:05,959 --> 00:18:10,584
-Erm... Um. -Sneaky little bastard.
356
00:18:12,125 --> 00:18:12,959
Isn't this cheating?
357
00:18:13,209 --> 00:18:14,751
No. Cos I'm not with anyone, am I?
358
00:18:14,834 --> 00:18:17,459
-You know what I mean, Charlie. -I know.
359
00:18:18,417 --> 00:18:21,417
You know, I don't wanna let you down.
360
00:18:23,918 --> 00:18:25,459
You don't wanna do this with me.
361
00:18:26,083 --> 00:18:27,542
Find yourself a nice young lady
362
00:18:27,626 --> 00:18:28,709
and get to know each other gently,
363
00:18:28,792 --> 00:18:33,375
without, you know, rushing.
364
00:18:36,209 --> 00:18:37,417
(SIGHS) Well,
365
00:18:38,083 --> 00:18:42,042
I know a nice young lady. So...
366
00:18:48,709 --> 00:18:49,876
(DOOR BELL RINGS)
367
00:18:49,959 --> 00:18:51,500
♪ Got ready for the night and ♪
368
00:18:53,125 --> 00:18:55,876
♪ She's heading for the lights ♪
369
00:18:55,959 --> 00:18:59,167
Yes! Shereen! You're here.
370
00:18:59,250 --> 00:19:00,459
Now, I don't have to try and think of
371
00:19:00,542 --> 00:19:02,292
cool things to say to people.
372
00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:04,083
I didn't come here to chum you.
373
00:19:04,167 --> 00:19:06,042
You don't know anyone. Who else are you gonna talk to?
374
00:19:06,125 --> 00:19:07,375
I don't know, other people?
375
00:19:07,792 --> 00:19:09,334
(SARCASTICALLY) Yeah, that's a great place to sit, guys.
376
00:19:09,792 --> 00:19:10,876
Oh, no, she won't.
377
00:19:11,125 --> 00:19:14,542
Hi. I'm Shereen. Nice to meet you.
378
00:19:14,626 --> 00:19:16,417
I'm Sef.
379
00:19:17,584 --> 00:19:19,709
♪ She can't tell the difference yet ♪
380
00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:20,125
Erm...
381
00:19:22,125 --> 00:19:24,417
♪ That's what you're coming for ♪
382
00:19:24,500 --> 00:19:25,876
♪ But they won't let you in ♪
383
00:19:25,959 --> 00:19:28,209
♪ And you drop your bag to the floor ♪
384
00:19:28,292 --> 00:19:30,209
Excuse me. Sorry.
385
00:19:30,292 --> 00:19:32,375
♪ Well, it's getting late now, hey now ♪
386
00:19:32,459 --> 00:19:35,083
♪ Enough of your arguments ♪
387
00:19:35,167 --> 00:19:36,500
That's actually mine.
388
00:19:36,584 --> 00:19:37,709
Sorry. Yeah, somebody drank mine,
389
00:19:37,792 --> 00:19:41,584
so, I thought it was maybe a "help yourself" kind of thing.
390
00:19:41,667 --> 00:19:42,417
It's not.
391
00:19:42,500 --> 00:19:44,500
Are you this selfish in bed, love?
392
00:19:44,584 --> 00:19:46,334
♪ You ask them what's happening ♪
393
00:19:46,417 --> 00:19:48,083
NANCY: Here, have one of mine.
394
00:19:49,417 --> 00:19:51,250
I bet she steals all the covers.
395
00:19:51,334 --> 00:19:53,000
Yeah, and makes loads of crumbs.
396
00:19:53,083 --> 00:19:54,167
(BOTH LAUGH)
397
00:19:54,250 --> 00:19:54,584
Who do you know here?
398
00:19:54,667 --> 00:19:57,250
You. Cheers.
399
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:06,500
-Are you all right? -Oh, yes.
400
00:20:07,375 --> 00:20:08,500
Er, just a bit drunk.
401
00:20:08,584 --> 00:20:09,667
You wanna sit down?
402
00:20:09,918 --> 00:20:11,459
No, no. I'll just keep my eyes shut.
403
00:20:11,542 --> 00:20:13,459
No, don't. That'll make it worse.
404
00:20:13,542 --> 00:20:16,500
Eyes on a fixed point. Come on, look at me.
405
00:20:17,167 --> 00:20:18,042
That's right.
406
00:20:18,292 --> 00:20:19,792
MARNIE: What would she taste like?
407
00:20:19,876 --> 00:20:21,751
What the fuck, Nancy?
408
00:20:23,459 --> 00:20:24,292
MARNIE: Nancy?
409
00:20:24,626 --> 00:20:26,167
AMBER: Maybe you should go find Joe.
410
00:20:29,459 --> 00:20:31,125
I thought this was a bit much?
411
00:20:31,209 --> 00:20:33,542
Yeah, it is a bit, mate. Chill out.
412
00:20:34,167 --> 00:20:36,250
Were you gonna say hi to me or were you just gonna spend
413
00:20:36,334 --> 00:20:38,918
the whole night in the kitchen getting handsy with my mates?
414
00:20:41,709 --> 00:20:42,918
MARNIE: Did you come in here to drink booze
415
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:43,709
or people's saliva?
416
00:20:43,792 --> 00:20:45,959
Fuck!
417
00:20:46,042 --> 00:20:46,959
AMBER: It's too much!
418
00:20:47,042 --> 00:20:50,500
This entire thing has been 20% sex
419
00:20:50,584 --> 00:20:53,292
and 80% me waiting for you to text,
420
00:20:53,375 --> 00:20:55,167
and I'm fed up, Nancy.
421
00:20:55,751 --> 00:20:56,375
-I'm fed up. -Babe, I'm...
422
00:20:59,167 --> 00:21:00,667
I've got you a card.
423
00:21:04,250 --> 00:21:05,792
You got me a card?
424
00:21:11,167 --> 00:21:13,876
(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)
425
00:21:17,792 --> 00:21:21,125
...it's just entirely misconceived, right?
426
00:21:21,209 --> 00:21:24,667
Because, fashion isn't about wearing a piece of cloth.
427
00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:27,167
It's like you're wearing a mask, but on your body.
428
00:21:27,250 --> 00:21:28,334
But, then, it's the opposite of wearing a mask,
429
00:21:28,417 --> 00:21:31,209
because it completely exposes who you are.
430
00:21:31,292 --> 00:21:34,500
-Have you seen Marnie at all? -Er, no. Sorry.
431
00:21:37,584 --> 00:21:41,292
MARNIE: I might be full of booze, but I'm empty inside.
432
00:21:46,125 --> 00:21:47,626
(LAUGHING IN THE DISTANCE)
433
00:21:48,417 --> 00:21:51,083
I want someone to fill me up.
434
00:21:58,918 --> 00:21:59,417
CHARLIE: Marnie.
435
00:22:03,042 --> 00:22:03,459
Excuse me.
436
00:22:05,542 --> 00:22:06,626
Mar.
437
00:22:31,167 --> 00:22:34,459
-What? -I'm doing sexy face.
438
00:22:35,167 --> 00:22:36,751
It's like the start of a murder.
439
00:22:36,834 --> 00:22:37,375
(LAUGHS)
440
00:22:37,459 --> 00:22:39,918
I'm not gonna murder you.
441
00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:42,125
It's like the opposite of a murder.
442
00:22:46,584 --> 00:22:48,042
-Ow. -(LAUGHS) What?
443
00:22:49,250 --> 00:22:50,250
Oh. Are you showing me your helmet?
444
00:22:50,334 --> 00:22:53,459
-(LAUGHS) It's not mine. -It's rubbish, then.
445
00:22:54,083 --> 00:22:55,459
Careful. Hey.
446
00:23:00,959 --> 00:23:02,209
(WHISPERS) Fuck me.
447
00:23:02,876 --> 00:23:05,209
-Not tonight. -Yes, tonight.
448
00:23:05,292 --> 00:23:06,292
Come on. I want to.
449
00:23:06,709 --> 00:23:08,042
-I don't think we should. -We should.
450
00:23:08,125 --> 00:23:10,083
You fuck me and I'll fuck you back.
451
00:23:11,751 --> 00:23:14,209
-Are you all right? -I will be.
452
00:23:15,209 --> 00:23:16,375
When you fuck me.
453
00:23:17,209 --> 00:23:19,500
JOE: Wait. Wait.
454
00:23:19,584 --> 00:23:22,167
-What if someone comes in? -I locked the door.
455
00:23:22,959 --> 00:23:26,334
-Stop fucking about. -You started it.
456
00:23:28,375 --> 00:23:29,542
I've not had as much as you.
457
00:23:29,918 --> 00:23:32,459
What, so, you're not drunk enough to have sex with me?
458
00:23:32,542 --> 00:23:35,167
No. You've had too much.
459
00:23:35,250 --> 00:23:39,626
(LAUGHING) It's fine, I consent. I consent.
460
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,876
(CHUCKLES) Marnie, stop it.
461
00:23:44,959 --> 00:23:46,876
-Look. Stop it. -Don't be so sexy, then.
462
00:23:46,959 --> 00:23:48,709
Marnie. Stop it. Mar... Look, Marnie...
463
00:23:48,792 --> 00:23:49,959
You want me to.
464
00:23:50,042 --> 00:23:51,334
-Stop. Stop it. -I want to.
465
00:23:51,417 --> 00:23:53,709
-Stop. Marnie, no. -Chill the fuck out.
466
00:23:54,834 --> 00:23:55,918
-Just let... -Marnie.
467
00:23:56,250 --> 00:23:57,834
I'm sorry.
468
00:23:58,751 --> 00:24:01,334
-(GROANS) -Marnie, you need help.
469
00:24:01,417 --> 00:24:02,751
I know I need help.
470
00:24:02,834 --> 00:24:04,918
This will help. You'd be helping me.
471
00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:08,459
Not like this. Not until you're better.
472
00:24:08,542 --> 00:24:12,250
No. If you don't wanna help me, don't touch me.
473
00:24:12,626 --> 00:24:15,584
(SIREN WAILING)
474
00:24:17,250 --> 00:24:19,751
I'm gonna get you some water.
475
00:24:25,584 --> 00:24:26,959
(MOANS)
476
00:24:50,292 --> 00:24:52,083
(MOANING)
477
00:24:54,167 --> 00:24:55,751
Excuse me. Excuse me.
478
00:24:56,125 --> 00:24:57,417
(MOANS)
479
00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:02,918
I can't breathe.
480
00:25:05,167 --> 00:25:07,042
I need to get out.
481
00:25:07,834 --> 00:25:08,667
(CRYING) I can't breathe.
482
00:25:13,500 --> 00:25:16,834
MARNIE: I could do anything and no one would even notice.
483
00:25:16,918 --> 00:25:18,334
I'm anonymous. A nobody.
484
00:25:18,417 --> 00:25:21,250
An actual fucking stranger.
485
00:25:21,334 --> 00:25:23,542
I could be anyone.
486
00:25:23,626 --> 00:25:25,292
London doesn't give a shit what that is.
487
00:25:25,375 --> 00:25:28,083
I still don't know what I am.
488
00:25:28,167 --> 00:25:30,918
I'm lost in a city of eight million people.
489
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:31,834
I can't find myself here.
490
00:25:32,250 --> 00:25:35,375
And every time I think I do, I always spin away,
491
00:25:35,459 --> 00:25:37,584
like a fucked-up whirlwind.
492
00:25:37,667 --> 00:25:39,709
I want to blow myself out.
493
00:25:41,792 --> 00:25:45,167
♪ Horns surrounding me ♪
494
00:25:45,250 --> 00:25:51,667
♪ Sing so forcefully and high ♪
495
00:25:51,751 --> 00:25:53,626
-(KNOCKING) -SEF: Hello.
496
00:25:54,792 --> 00:25:57,834
If you don't come out, I'm gonna tell everyone you're pooing.
497
00:25:57,918 --> 00:26:00,000
-Just a minute. -(KNOCKING)
498
00:26:00,083 --> 00:26:00,751
You won't get through. I've tried...
499
00:26:00,834 --> 00:26:02,626
Marnie, just answer your phone.
500
00:26:02,709 --> 00:26:03,834
Where do you think she went?
501
00:26:04,083 --> 00:26:05,292
I have no idea where she could be.
502
00:26:05,375 --> 00:26:06,250
Sorry.
503
00:26:06,334 --> 00:26:07,542
-SEF: Come on. -All right.
504
00:26:07,834 --> 00:26:09,751
SEF: There's a guy having a poo in the loo. He's...
505
00:26:11,209 --> 00:26:12,459
It's all yours.
506
00:26:12,542 --> 00:26:13,584
-Do you do coke? -No.
507
00:26:16,167 --> 00:26:20,250
JOE: She just got a bit... She's had too much.
508
00:26:20,334 --> 00:26:21,709
I went to get her some water.
509
00:26:21,792 --> 00:26:23,083
Charlie, did you find Marnie?
510
00:26:23,334 --> 00:26:26,250
AMBER: What happened? JOE: She just lost it.
511
00:26:26,334 --> 00:26:28,667
-What did you do to her, mate? -Nothing, mate.
512
00:26:28,751 --> 00:26:32,167
It's not gonna work. She's not picking up.
513
00:26:36,584 --> 00:26:38,667
You all right, kiddo? Where are you?
514
00:26:40,751 --> 00:26:41,459
What? How come she picked up for him?
515
00:26:42,334 --> 00:26:45,667
Marnie, where? (SIGHS)
516
00:26:45,751 --> 00:26:46,959
BOTH: What did she say?
517
00:26:47,042 --> 00:26:48,667
CHARLIE: It's fine. I've got it.
518
00:26:49,042 --> 00:26:49,500
Charlie!
519
00:26:49,584 --> 00:26:53,125
(RAP MUSIC PLAYING)
520
00:27:02,375 --> 00:27:02,792
Whoo!
521
00:27:10,125 --> 00:27:12,042
Be sexier.
522
00:27:13,542 --> 00:27:18,459
You're not... You're not being sexy enough.
523
00:27:25,959 --> 00:27:27,375
-Hey. -Hi.
524
00:27:27,459 --> 00:27:27,834
I'd like one.
525
00:27:30,042 --> 00:27:32,709
(SLURRING) Excuse... Your hair is long.
526
00:27:32,792 --> 00:27:35,918
-Excuse me. -WOMAN: Who wants a dance, boys?
527
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:39,375
-(ALL SHOUTING) -Sorry. Sorry.
528
00:27:39,459 --> 00:27:41,209
(SLURRING) He is drunk.
529
00:27:41,292 --> 00:27:42,125
Hey, I'd like one.
530
00:27:42,459 --> 00:27:45,459
-WOMAN: You're so drunk. -One nude private dance, please.
531
00:27:45,959 --> 00:27:46,959
WOMAN: You look lonely.
532
00:27:47,292 --> 00:27:49,626
Er, nah. He doesn't look into it.
533
00:27:49,709 --> 00:27:51,459
I look into it cos I am. (LAUGHS)
534
00:27:51,542 --> 00:27:52,584
Er, how much is it?
535
00:27:52,667 --> 00:27:55,834
-Er, thirty for... -Can you leave me alone, please?
536
00:27:55,918 --> 00:27:57,584
Fifty? I'll give you more if you...
537
00:27:57,667 --> 00:27:59,083
No. I said, no. I said, no.
538
00:27:59,417 --> 00:28:01,125
-I can go into my overdraft... -Can you not touch my hair?
539
00:28:01,209 --> 00:28:04,167
Whoa, whoa, what are you... What are you doing, mate?
540
00:28:04,751 --> 00:28:06,417
I thought you were a feminist.
541
00:28:06,500 --> 00:28:07,209
(TEARFULLY) I'm trying to buy a lap dance,
542
00:28:07,292 --> 00:28:08,709
but she won't give me one.
543
00:28:08,792 --> 00:28:12,292
Okay. Well, let me give you one at home, all right?
544
00:28:12,375 --> 00:28:13,751
And it'll be funny, instead of like this.
545
00:28:13,834 --> 00:28:16,083
-Come on, let's go. -No, I'm not finished.
546
00:28:16,167 --> 00:28:18,584
Why you doing this?
547
00:28:19,375 --> 00:28:22,083
Cos this is the stuff I think about.
548
00:28:22,167 --> 00:28:24,751
No matter who I'm with or what I'm doing,
549
00:28:24,834 --> 00:28:26,125
this is what's in my head.
550
00:28:26,209 --> 00:28:27,709
And I need to know what it means.
551
00:28:27,792 --> 00:28:29,459
No wonder I can't be around people.
552
00:28:29,542 --> 00:28:32,125
They can't be around me. I don't wanna be around me.
553
00:28:32,209 --> 00:28:34,792
-I wanna be around you. -I'm seeing if this turns me on,
554
00:28:34,876 --> 00:28:39,125
so I know what I like and what I am.
555
00:28:39,209 --> 00:28:40,751
I need to know it in here.
556
00:28:40,834 --> 00:28:43,751
If I can just get a fucking lap dance!
557
00:28:43,834 --> 00:28:45,459
Did your therapist put you up to this?
558
00:28:45,542 --> 00:28:46,834
I told me to do this.
559
00:28:46,918 --> 00:28:49,292
Cos I'm the one in my head
560
00:28:49,375 --> 00:28:51,417
and I'm the one who can't be in it a minute longer.
561
00:28:51,500 --> 00:28:54,334
-Come on. I'm taking you home. -(CRYING) No. I don't know yet.
562
00:28:54,417 --> 00:28:56,792
I can't leave until I know how I really feel.
563
00:28:56,876 --> 00:28:59,000
You're not gonna find out in here.
564
00:29:01,209 --> 00:29:03,042
It's not real.
565
00:29:03,959 --> 00:29:06,334
But, I don't feel real.
566
00:29:07,834 --> 00:29:08,876
You are real.
567
00:29:10,042 --> 00:29:11,500
Cos I'm real.
568
00:29:12,334 --> 00:29:13,876
(CHUCKLES) And we're both in here.
569
00:29:17,250 --> 00:29:19,250
Come here.
570
00:29:19,500 --> 00:29:21,125
Why are you here? I was such a dick to you.
571
00:29:21,209 --> 00:29:22,500
It's all right. It's all right.
572
00:29:22,584 --> 00:29:24,167
(MARNIE CRYING)
573
00:29:24,250 --> 00:29:27,667
CHARLIE: I'm here cos you're here. That's the deal.
574
00:30:04,042 --> 00:30:05,626
Door-to-door service.
575
00:30:06,626 --> 00:30:10,042
Just as well. I don't know how I would've got home.
576
00:30:10,125 --> 00:30:13,083
I spent all my money on strippers and booze.
577
00:30:13,167 --> 00:30:16,167
Yeah. It was, er... It was on my way, so...
578
00:30:16,667 --> 00:30:17,751
Was it?
579
00:30:18,959 --> 00:30:22,918
It really wasn't. It was a massive inconvenience. (LAUGHS)
580
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:23,876
I know it was.
581
00:30:27,792 --> 00:30:29,834
I'll, er... I'll get off, then.
582
00:30:29,918 --> 00:30:31,334
And, yeah.
583
00:30:31,417 --> 00:30:33,584
-Oh! -MARNIE: Thank you.
584
00:30:34,459 --> 00:30:36,250
Er, text me when you get home.
585
00:30:36,334 --> 00:30:37,876
Yeah. You too.
586
00:30:38,542 --> 00:30:40,584
I know you're on your doorstep,
587
00:30:40,918 --> 00:30:43,751
but, fuck knows what'll happen between now and then.
588
00:30:45,667 --> 00:30:47,751
Or I could make you a cup of tea.
589
00:30:48,959 --> 00:30:51,000
Yeah. Yeah, it's the least you could do.
590
00:31:03,876 --> 00:31:07,334
(SIGHS) You should tell Joe you're all right.
591
00:31:07,417 --> 00:31:09,167
He'll be worried.
592
00:31:09,250 --> 00:31:11,209
I think he'll be fine.
593
00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:12,751
What happened with you two?
594
00:31:12,834 --> 00:31:16,918
Not like, in detail. Just the gist.
595
00:31:17,042 --> 00:31:18,834
So I know whether to fight him.
596
00:31:22,209 --> 00:31:23,667
Something happened.
597
00:31:23,751 --> 00:31:25,500
Right, yeah, yeah. Obviously.
598
00:31:25,584 --> 00:31:28,083
But, it won't again.
599
00:31:28,167 --> 00:31:29,500
I don't wanna be around someone
600
00:31:29,792 --> 00:31:32,584
who's always secretly wishing I'm better than I am.
601
00:31:34,792 --> 00:31:37,167
What does "being better" even mean, anyway?
602
00:31:40,792 --> 00:31:43,459
You managed it. Sarah.
603
00:31:43,542 --> 00:31:45,626
Yeah, that's... That's not happening.
604
00:31:45,709 --> 00:31:48,667
It didn't happen. I'm not better.
605
00:31:48,751 --> 00:31:50,375
I'm like you. We're both...
606
00:31:51,542 --> 00:31:53,292
Fuck-ups together.
607
00:31:58,709 --> 00:32:02,042
I think I'll save it for a special occasion.
608
00:32:05,250 --> 00:32:07,918
Your birthday or something? Mother's Day?
609
00:32:10,167 --> 00:32:11,417
(DOOR OPENING)
610
00:32:14,375 --> 00:32:16,542
(DOOR CLOSING)
611
00:32:18,250 --> 00:32:20,751
(EXHALES) You shouldn't worry people like that.
612
00:32:20,834 --> 00:32:21,834
I'm sorry.
613
00:32:21,918 --> 00:32:23,292
Thank you for worrying. I don't deserve it.
614
00:32:23,375 --> 00:32:24,959
No, you don't.
615
00:32:26,584 --> 00:32:27,292
See you, Charlie.
616
00:32:27,375 --> 00:32:29,667
(SIGHS) Shereen.
617
00:32:31,667 --> 00:32:32,125
(DOOR CLOSES)
618
00:32:36,125 --> 00:32:39,334
Anyway, you two obviously have stuff to sort out.
619
00:32:40,584 --> 00:32:41,959
So...
620
00:32:42,042 --> 00:32:43,918
You sure? What about your tea?
621
00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:46,500
(CHUCKLES) I've seen how you make hot drinks, mate.
622
00:32:46,584 --> 00:32:47,918
Not happening.
623
00:32:50,042 --> 00:32:53,626
You can buy me one next week, if you want. Good night.
624
00:32:54,209 --> 00:32:56,876
-Eat a banana. -(DOOR CLOSES)
625
00:32:57,417 --> 00:32:58,876
(SIGHS)
626
00:33:00,167 --> 00:33:01,500
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
627
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:04,667
I didn't say come in.
628
00:33:04,751 --> 00:33:05,000
I just wanna say,
629
00:33:06,083 --> 00:33:08,959
I never wanted to live here in the first place.
630
00:33:09,042 --> 00:33:11,292
The only reason I did, is cos I had nowhere else to go.
631
00:33:11,375 --> 00:33:12,918
And it was rent-free.
632
00:33:13,959 --> 00:33:15,083
I was a shit person, Shereen.
633
00:33:15,500 --> 00:33:17,876
I still am.
634
00:33:18,667 --> 00:33:21,375
And it's not because of what I've got.
635
00:33:21,459 --> 00:33:23,125
You were right when you said it was me.
636
00:33:23,209 --> 00:33:24,417
It is me. It's how I am with people
637
00:33:24,500 --> 00:33:28,918
and I don't wanna be like that with people. Especially not you.
638
00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:30,459
You make me feel like a small person, and I'm not.
639
00:33:30,542 --> 00:33:31,918
I know you're not.
640
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:34,000
Cos some of the things I've done for you
641
00:33:34,083 --> 00:33:35,667
have actually been quite big.
642
00:33:35,751 --> 00:33:37,209
Like letting you live here, paying for your therapy,
643
00:33:37,292 --> 00:33:41,167
(CRYING) making that huge pavlova that hardly anybody ate.
644
00:33:41,250 --> 00:33:42,918
Sorry.
645
00:33:43,334 --> 00:33:45,250
(CRYING) It's in the fridge decaying.
646
00:33:45,334 --> 00:33:46,918
Like our friendship.
647
00:33:48,626 --> 00:33:50,584
It might still be edible.
648
00:33:50,667 --> 00:33:52,542
Meringue keeps for ages.
649
00:33:57,167 --> 00:33:59,918
-I love living with you. -I love living with you!
650
00:34:01,250 --> 00:34:02,918
Please, can I stay?
651
00:34:06,125 --> 00:34:06,250
No.
652
00:34:11,500 --> 00:34:13,834
(EXHALES) Fine. Er,
653
00:34:13,918 --> 00:34:16,584
I'll start looking for places tomorrow.
654
00:34:16,667 --> 00:34:18,584
Preferably somewhere not in Tottenham.
655
00:34:18,918 --> 00:34:20,042
Wow. Okay.
656
00:34:20,417 --> 00:34:21,709
Somewhere really far away like Lewisham or Streatham.
657
00:34:21,792 --> 00:34:23,876
Okay, Shereen. I get it.
658
00:34:23,959 --> 00:34:26,751
And make sure it's got two bedrooms.
659
00:34:31,417 --> 00:34:32,792
You're a fully grown woman.
660
00:34:32,876 --> 00:34:33,500
You can't sleep in a cupboard forever.
661
00:34:33,584 --> 00:34:36,209
(LAUGHING)
662
00:34:39,209 --> 00:34:42,000
♪ Looking from a window above ♪
663
00:34:42,083 --> 00:34:44,667
♪ It's like a story of love ♪
664
00:34:44,751 --> 00:34:46,083
(LAUGHING)
665
00:34:46,167 --> 00:34:47,334
♪ Can you hear me? ♪
666
00:34:47,417 --> 00:34:49,500
MARNIE: I've spent so long trying to find myself
667
00:34:49,584 --> 00:34:52,000
in London,
668
00:34:52,083 --> 00:34:53,626
I almost didn't see all the other people.
669
00:34:54,918 --> 00:34:59,375
♪ Want you near me ♪
670
00:34:59,459 --> 00:35:00,918
To truly find yourself,
671
00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:03,250
you have to show others who you are.
672
00:35:04,626 --> 00:35:07,459
Wow. Turns out, I am a massive wanker.
673
00:35:07,542 --> 00:35:13,667
♪ And all I ever knew, only you ♪
674
00:35:24,042 --> 00:35:29,626
♪ All I needed was the love you gave ♪
675
00:35:29,709 --> 00:35:33,000
♪ All I needed for another day ♪
676
00:35:33,083 --> 00:35:39,250
♪ And all I ever knew, only you ♪
47642
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