All language subtitles for Mrs Browns Boys s05ex4 B and B Mammy.eng

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranรฎ)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,360 This programme contains some strong language 2 00:00:10,400 --> 00:00:11,600 MRS BROWN LAUGHS 3 00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:15,640 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Mrs Brown's Boys! 4 00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:17,440 APPLAUSE 5 00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:17,440 She's Mrs Brown 6 00:00:17,440 --> 00:00:18,480 Agnes 7 00:00:18,480 --> 00:00:20,360 That's Mrs Brown 8 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:21,680 Agnes 9 00:00:21,680 --> 00:00:24,040 Our Mrs Brown. 10 00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:28,120 Hello! 11 00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:31,920 Oh, sad news - Rory is not coming back from Wuhan. 12 00:00:31,920 --> 00:00:33,520 AUDIENCE:Aww. 13 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:35,760 I know. 14 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:35,760 SHE SNIFFS 15 00:00:35,760 --> 00:00:38,880 Every time I pass his bedroom, I cry. 16 00:00:38,880 --> 00:00:41,600 It breaks my heart to look in there and see that... 17 00:00:41,600 --> 00:00:43,840 ..mirror on the ceiling covered in dust. 18 00:00:45,680 --> 00:00:49,080 So I've decided to rent out his room, you know, bed and breakfast. 19 00:00:49,080 --> 00:00:53,040 I have somebody up there at the moment, Mr Yoshimoto. 20 00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:54,520 He's Japanese. 21 00:00:54,520 --> 00:00:56,040 SHE CHUCKLES 22 00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:58,320 I'm just going through the paper here and going through the ads. 23 00:00:58,320 --> 00:00:59,720 Is it me or... 24 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:01,280 ..or are ads getting more stupid? 25 00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:02,880 Listen to this one. 26 00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:05,120 "Person wanted for home care. 27 00:01:05,120 --> 00:01:08,200 "Must have own hula hoop and be good with falcons." 28 00:01:11,880 --> 00:01:13,000 Oh here's my one. 29 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:14,920 SHE CHUCKLES 30 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:19,040 "Double room available with views of the ancient west." 31 00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:21,680 Finglas West. 32 00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:27,080 "Contact Agnes Brown, 92 James Larkin Court, Finglas." 33 00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:31,320 Why aren't you dressed? 34 00:01:31,320 --> 00:01:33,720 Your lodger used all the hot water. 35 00:01:33,720 --> 00:01:36,920 Mr Yoshimoto is not a lodger, Cathy, he's our guest. 36 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:39,920 Guests don't pay money to stay in your house, Mammy. 37 00:01:39,920 --> 00:01:41,120 Neither do you. 38 00:01:43,240 --> 00:01:46,720 You want tea?No, I'm going over to Sharon's for a shower, 39 00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:48,800 seeing as I can't have one here. 40 00:01:48,800 --> 00:01:50,920 Well, be quick about it. I need help turning that 41 00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:52,360 room around for the next guest. 42 00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:54,760 Ah, you haven't got another booking, have you? 43 00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:57,080 Not yet, but that should change things. 44 00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:00,720 Oh, and by the way, if I get a double booking, 45 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:03,600 you're going to have to vacate your room. 46 00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:04,800 You'll have to sleep in with me. 47 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:07,960 SHE SNORES AND GROANS 48 00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:11,040 "Oh, Cathy, Cathy! Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho!" 49 00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:13,720 I'd rather sleep in the garden shed. 50 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:16,480 If you like.Whatever. 51 00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:17,960 Hmm. 52 00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:20,680 Mr Yoshimoto's been here for two nights. 53 00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:25,920 He's as quiet as a mouse. You wouldn't even know he was here. 54 00:02:25,920 --> 00:02:27,160 DOOR CLOSES 55 00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:28,400 That's him up now. 56 00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:34,160 Mr Yoshimoto?! It's eight o'clock! 57 00:02:43,640 --> 00:02:45,840 Is he gone yet? No. 58 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:47,080 HE WHIMPERS 59 00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:51,760 As you can see, my entry into the hospitality sector... 60 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:55,560 ..well, has not been welcomed by all the residents. 61 00:02:55,560 --> 00:02:57,520 I don't know why. 62 00:02:57,520 --> 00:03:00,400 Mr Yoshimoto's a lovely man. 63 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:02,160 Doesn't speak a word of English. 64 00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:03,880 Good morning, Mrs Brown! 65 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:07,560 Jesus! You frightened the shyness out of me. 66 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:11,080 Er, good morning, Mr Yoshimoto. 67 00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:14,280 Good morning, Ma! Good morning, son. 68 00:03:15,920 --> 00:03:17,840 Er, who's this? 69 00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:20,600 Oh, er, boys, this is Mr Yoshimoto. 70 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:23,120 Yoshimoto! Tokyo! 71 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:25,120 Hai! 72 00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:27,200 Buster Brady! Finglas! 73 00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:28,240 Hi! 74 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:32,920 Mr Yoshimoto is from the land of the rising sun. 75 00:03:32,920 --> 00:03:34,080 Ah, Tipperary. 76 00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:37,000 Japan, Buster. 77 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,040 Oh! 78 00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:39,080 Bonjour! 79 00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:41,480 Konnichiwa. 80 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:42,520 Bless you. 81 00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:47,240 He could do that all day, you know. 82 00:03:47,240 --> 00:03:49,600 Is the guest house thing going well for you, Ma? 83 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:51,480 Well, I've only had one booking so far, 84 00:03:51,480 --> 00:03:54,880 but I think that might change things. 85 00:03:54,880 --> 00:03:56,640 I wouldn't be putting your address on it, Ma. 86 00:03:56,640 --> 00:03:59,800 Dermot, if I don't put me address, how will people know where I live? 87 00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:01,520 You just put your phone number down. 88 00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:04,600 That way when they ring to book, you get an idea who you're dealing with. 89 00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:05,920 Lot of weirdos out there, Ma. 90 00:04:05,920 --> 00:04:08,360 Mm. Lot of weirdos in here, son. 91 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:15,000 How do you turn this fella off? 92 00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:17,880 Mr Yoshimoto? Hai. 93 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:19,680 Is that you away home now? 94 00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:21,080 Yes. 95 00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:23,120 I...pay. 96 00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:24,720 Oh, thank you very much. 97 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:27,040 Sayonara. Sa... Sayonara. 98 00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:28,800 No, one is plenty, one is plenty. 99 00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,400 What a lovely man. 100 00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:33,320 Heh. What's he even doing in Finglas? 101 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:35,320 Setting up the plot for this episode, really. 102 00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:39,680 That was quick. 103 00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:42,200 Winnie doesn't have any hot water, either. 104 00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:43,840 Hello, Cathy. 105 00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:47,400 Goodbye, Cathy. 106 00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:50,760 She's not happy about me renting out Rory's room. 107 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:53,160 I think it's brilliant. Easy money, Ma. 108 00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:54,680 That's what I say, son. 109 00:04:54,680 --> 00:04:57,200 Mwah. Sayonara. Heh-heh! 110 00:04:57,200 --> 00:04:58,480 Fuckin' yen? 111 00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:06,600 How's Betty's mother getting on? 112 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:11,040 SHE MUMBLES 113 00:05:13,040 --> 00:05:14,360 Is that serious? 114 00:05:14,360 --> 00:05:16,280 SHE MUMBLES 115 00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:20,320 I'm going home if you two are going to talk in code. 116 00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:24,480 Dermo, I'm really enjoying this week off work. 117 00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:26,480 Yeah? Well, make the most of it. 118 00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:29,680 As soon as the New Year sales start, we'll be busy. 119 00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:32,800 People will be buying everything - new clothes, smartphones, 120 00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:35,440 computer games, booking summer holidays in Spain 121 00:05:35,440 --> 00:05:36,640 or weekends in Paris. 122 00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:37,760 Oh, nice one. 123 00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:40,360 Oh, yeah. Busy, busy, busy. 124 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:41,480 What will we be promoting? 125 00:05:41,480 --> 00:05:43,240 Flaherty's Mouth Organ Repairs. 126 00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:47,760 Oh, right. Busy, busy, busy. 127 00:05:47,760 --> 00:05:51,600 Don't knock it, Buster. Where would you go with a broken mouth organ? 128 00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:52,640 The dump. 129 00:05:54,560 --> 00:05:55,960 Sharon? 130 00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:57,760 Will Maria let you have another one? 131 00:05:57,760 --> 00:06:00,720 "Let me"? What are you talking about, "let me"? 132 00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:01,760 Right, Dermot! 133 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:02,800 Got to go. 134 00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:06,280 Oh, good evening, ladies. 135 00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:07,520 Oh, party's over. 136 00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:11,720 Hello, Agnes! Ready to go?Yes. 137 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:13,200 Would you like a drink, Hidly? 138 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:15,120 Er, no, thank you, Agnes. 139 00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:17,920 I'll have a little sherry when we get to the theatre. 140 00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:19,320 That's a lovely dress. 141 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,000 What brand is it? Clearance? 142 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:24,080 Oh! Agnes, you're so funny. 143 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:25,800 Aren't I. 144 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:30,160 You can't imagine how I pondered over which shoes to wear with it. 145 00:06:30,160 --> 00:06:33,160 And you can't imagine how little I buckin' care. 146 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:36,480 So funny. Right, let's go. 147 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:38,360 Dermot, you are going to love this play. 148 00:06:38,360 --> 00:06:39,720 Yeah, I can't wait. 149 00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:42,160 And it's all in Latin. 150 00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:43,480 See ya, Ma. 151 00:06:43,480 --> 00:06:46,040 Hail Caesar. 152 00:06:46,040 --> 00:06:47,480 I'm giving up the bed and breakfast. 153 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:50,480 Ah, no. Yeah, I think I'd like something more permanent. 154 00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:53,400 I'm going to change me advert to "lodger wanted". 155 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:55,680 What if some weirdo answers it? 156 00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:57,960 Pfft. He'll fit in nicely with Grandad. 157 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,480 Have you seen this man? 158 00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:03,120 Is that a dating app? 159 00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:04,520 Send me that photo. 160 00:07:04,520 --> 00:07:07,400 This is an escaped criminal. Very dangerous. 161 00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:08,960 Really? Show me again. 162 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:11,360 Yeah, send me that. 163 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:14,880 Look at this. 164 00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:16,320 Is that your sister? 165 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:17,840 Do you know this man? 166 00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:20,280 Yeah, that's Slasher Sam. He's in prison. 167 00:07:20,280 --> 00:07:22,560 Not tonight he's not. If you see him, call the Guards. 168 00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:24,200 HE CHUCKLES 169 00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:24,200 Yeah, right! 170 00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:25,920 Hey! 171 00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:28,240 Yeah, right. 172 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:29,760 Tell your sister I said hello. 173 00:07:33,680 --> 00:07:36,480 I've cleaned that room after your guest. 174 00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:38,760 I washed the sheets and the pillowcases, 175 00:07:38,760 --> 00:07:40,680 and you didn't lift a finger to help. 176 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:43,320 I'm sorry, Cathy. A finger you wanted? Sorry. 177 00:07:46,080 --> 00:07:48,040 You never fail to disappoint me, Mammy. 178 00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:51,120 Calm down, Cathy. Nobody could live up to your standards. 179 00:07:51,120 --> 00:07:52,520 You could try. 180 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:56,480 Hey, Cathy. 181 00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:58,760 Don't you start. 182 00:07:58,760 --> 00:08:00,040 Hello, all. 183 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:02,240 Hello, son. What's going on there? 184 00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:04,600 Ah, who buckin' knows? It's Cathy. 185 00:08:05,680 --> 00:08:07,440 May I ask a favour, Ma? 186 00:08:07,440 --> 00:08:09,080 You can ask. 187 00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:10,920 I have to go back up to Betty in Donegal. 188 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:12,800 She's not talking to me. We had a fight this morning. 189 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:13,960 On the phone? 190 00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:17,080 Yeah. I didn't say "sweetheart" before I hung up. 191 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:20,320 Oh, my God! 192 00:08:20,320 --> 00:08:22,840 Anyway, Ma, would you mind looking after Bono again? 193 00:08:22,840 --> 00:08:24,040 Just for one night. 194 00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:26,160 Of course. Ah, that's great. 195 00:08:26,160 --> 00:08:28,240 I've a spare room at the moment. 196 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:29,800 For now. 197 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:31,720 Thanks, Ma. See yous later. See you, love. 198 00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:34,040 See you, Cathy! See you later, Mark! 199 00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:38,320 Cathy! Change the sheet and pillowcases on the spare bed! 200 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:39,840 Bono's staying tonight! 201 00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:43,240 Already done. What am I, the new skivvy? 202 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:45,640 "Skivvy"? That's a bit strong. 203 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:47,720 Yeah, a bit strong. Yeah. 204 00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:50,040 Housemaid, that's nicer. 205 00:08:50,040 --> 00:08:51,560 You're the new housemaid. 206 00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:57,080 I'm going over to Sharon for a bit of peace. 207 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,840 Right, you two, come on. See you down at Foley's. 208 00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:03,440 Oh, OK. See you later, pet. 209 00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:04,760 See you later, love. 210 00:09:06,640 --> 00:09:09,720 You know, it'll be nice to have Bono with me just for the night. 211 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:12,240 How are you, Grandad? 212 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:13,840 Me neck is a bit sore. 213 00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:15,040 Me knees are killing me. 214 00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:17,200 Too long an answer. Eh-eh. Thank you for playing. 215 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:18,280 Ugh. 216 00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:20,880 Are you here, Granny? 217 00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:23,600 In here, Bono! How's me favourite granny? 218 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,400 Ha-ha. That's going to cost me. 219 00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:26,800 THEY CHUCKLE 220 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:29,560 No. God, Bono, look at the state of you. 221 00:09:29,560 --> 00:09:31,840 Yeah, well, the good news is we won. 222 00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:33,960 Well, the losers must look shite. 223 00:09:35,440 --> 00:09:37,960 So, how's your Donegal granny? 224 00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:39,160 Ah, still fighting. 225 00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:41,040 Oh, she always was a scrapper. 226 00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:42,520 I remember Mark and Betty's wedding. 227 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:45,000 She went full Bruce Lee. 228 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,880 She made shit of the ice sculpture. 229 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:50,840 Granny, can I ask you a wee favour? 230 00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,040 How much? 231 00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:53,480 Not money. 232 00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:55,320 I want you to meet me girlfriend. 233 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:56,920 If we want to have a future together, 234 00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:58,440 I'd like you two to get along. 235 00:09:58,440 --> 00:10:01,280 You're a young man. You should be out there playing the field, 236 00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:03,360 meeting other young girls. 237 00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:05,120 But I only want to be with Tallulah. 238 00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:10,680 Seriously? 239 00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:12,240 Ta-fuckin'-llulah? 240 00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:16,360 How long have yous been courtin'? 241 00:10:17,840 --> 00:10:19,040 What's that? 242 00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:21,840 Neckin', you know, neckin'. 243 00:10:21,840 --> 00:10:22,880 Smoochin'. 244 00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:25,200 Lickin' lips, suckin' face. 245 00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:28,080 Which inevitably leads to rubbin' the relic. 246 00:10:31,560 --> 00:10:33,720 Two months, but I've known her a lot longer. 247 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:35,440 Oh, God, yous are nearly married. 248 00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:37,640 I've told her I love her. 249 00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:39,000 Ya gobshite. 250 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:42,520 Bono, I'll give you the same advice that 251 00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:44,640 I gave to my own sons about love. 252 00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:46,360 Don't be silly. 253 00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:48,560 Put a condom on your willy! 254 00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:52,800 Shut up! 255 00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:57,600 Bono is not at that stage. 256 00:10:57,600 --> 00:10:59,800 He's far too young, far too young. 257 00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:01,160 He's not doing that. 258 00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:04,040 Bono, jump in here any time you like. 259 00:11:05,880 --> 00:11:07,360 I'm not, Granny. Ah. 260 00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:09,320 But...she is a bit older than me. 261 00:11:10,560 --> 00:11:12,000 AUDIENCE GASP 262 00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:13,960 Define "older". 263 00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:15,080 23. 264 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:16,720 AUDIENCE GASP 265 00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:19,080 That's not a young girl - that's a grown-arse woman. 266 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:22,920 Yeah, I know. And she's really smart, Granny. 267 00:11:22,920 --> 00:11:25,400 Yeah, I'm not surprised, she's had plenty of life experience. 268 00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:28,600 She actually reminds me of you. 269 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:34,600 Good-lookin', is she? 270 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:39,240 Shut up! 271 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:40,280 Ahem. 272 00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:44,720 Well, she's really important to me. Will you just meet her? 273 00:11:44,720 --> 00:11:46,520 All right, bring her round tonight. 274 00:11:46,520 --> 00:11:48,440 Thanks, Granny. 275 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:49,960 But, Bono... 276 00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:52,000 ..YOU'RE really important to ME. 277 00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:54,840 I won't pull me punches. If I don't like her, I'll tell you. 278 00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:58,520 I wish my son had've listened to me. 279 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:06,080 Just remember, if he did, you'd be fuckin' homeless. 280 00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:14,560 You're sure this is the cheapest wine? 281 00:12:14,560 --> 00:12:16,400 One step up from turpentine. 282 00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:21,920 There we go. 283 00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:25,120 The attack happened in the village, Doctor, not 30 minutes ago. 284 00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:26,600 He didn't actually hurt you, did he? 285 00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:28,760 I'm emotionally scarred, Doctor. 286 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,480 Oh, are you sure this is a merlot? 287 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:32,200 Th-that's what I asked for. 288 00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:34,880 Er... You must've gotten a terrible fright. 289 00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:37,960 Whole life flashed before my eyes. I might never recover. 290 00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:39,680 Because it smells like a Bordeaux. 291 00:12:39,680 --> 00:12:41,840 Oh, you're in shock. 292 00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:44,320 True, Doctor, I am, I am. 293 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:45,640 Mm. 294 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:49,040 We need to warn everybody. We should alert the media. 295 00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:51,080 No, it's a Shiraz. 296 00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:54,080 Maybe we should leave this to the police to handle. 297 00:12:54,080 --> 00:12:55,680 You don't want to cause a panic. 298 00:12:55,680 --> 00:12:56,720 Don't I? 299 00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:00,600 What's up with Hilliary? 300 00:13:00,600 --> 00:13:02,640 Some fella gave her a fright down the village. 301 00:13:02,640 --> 00:13:04,840 Maria said it was the mad bastard. 302 00:13:04,840 --> 00:13:05,920 Who? 303 00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:07,400 Maria. Dermot's wife. 304 00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:12,200 I know who Maria is! Who's the mad bastard, you dope? 305 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:15,000 The fella who escaped from the prison van, you dope. 306 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,280 What's he on about? 307 00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:17,760 It's all over the news, Mark. 308 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:20,400 The Guards, the Army, everybody's searching for him. 309 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,200 Guards, Army... 310 00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:23,240 ..searching. 311 00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:25,440 Dope. 312 00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:38,040 HE GROANS DOORBELL RINGS 313 00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:41,720 SHE SINGS 314 00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:46,720 Oh, for feck's sake. 315 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:51,120 Hi, Damien. Hey, Trev. Ready to hit a few balls? 316 00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:52,400 I could do that from here. 317 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:54,800 Mammy, stop. 318 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:56,800 I'm ready, Damien. Let's go.Right. 319 00:13:56,800 --> 00:14:00,360 Oh, Mrs Brown, the local brass band will be collecting today. 320 00:14:00,360 --> 00:14:02,440 Be as generous as you can. They do amazing... 321 00:14:04,480 --> 00:14:06,440 Who was that? Penis Williams. 322 00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:09,080 Who?! 323 00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:10,240 Oh, it doesn't matter. 324 00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:13,200 DOORBELL RINGS Now what did he feckin' forget? 325 00:14:15,520 --> 00:14:17,000 Now what do you want? 326 00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:18,600 Oh, I'm terribly sorry. 327 00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:20,320 AUDIENCE GASP 328 00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:23,120 Er, you must be here about the room? 329 00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:24,320 What? 330 00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:25,480 Yeah. 331 00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:28,080 Yeah, that's right. We're here about the room, yeah. 332 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:31,320 Well, there's...there's only one room. How many of you are there? 333 00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:32,840 Just us. 334 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:38,240 Who's this? 335 00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:40,560 Oh, he's nobody. Huh? 336 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:43,000 I must warn you that the room is not available tonight. 337 00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:44,320 It won't be available till tomorrow. 338 00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:47,680 Eh? What? Yeah, to... Tomorrow's fine, that's good, yeah. 339 00:14:47,680 --> 00:14:49,600 Yeah. Would you like to see the room? 340 00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:51,360 No, no, we don't want to disturb anybody. 341 00:14:51,360 --> 00:14:53,560 Oh, you're not disturbing anyone. I'm here on my own, 342 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:55,240 except for that pile of shite there. 343 00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:56,640 HE GRUNTS 344 00:14:56,640 --> 00:14:57,800 Where's the man of the house? 345 00:14:57,800 --> 00:14:59,320 Oh... Glasnevin Cemetery. 346 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:01,080 Gravedigger? Corpse. 347 00:15:02,160 --> 00:15:04,840 Good. I mean...sorry for your loss. 348 00:15:04,840 --> 00:15:06,600 Right, show us our room. 349 00:15:10,840 --> 00:15:13,920 You all right, Mammy?Ah, I'm worried about Agnes, you know? 350 00:15:13,920 --> 00:15:16,000 It's not like her to miss all of this. 351 00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,000 Yeah, and Cathy said she'd be here too. 352 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,400 Yeah, you know, I'm going to pop back to her house and see 353 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:21,880 if they're all right. 354 00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:27,200 Hello! 355 00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:27,200 HE SHRIEKS 356 00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:31,040 May I have your attention, please? 357 00:15:31,040 --> 00:15:32,520 What's going on here? 358 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:34,920 Hilliary must be drunk again. 359 00:15:34,920 --> 00:15:37,320 Please, everyone, listen to Mother. 360 00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:39,520 Oh, Dermo, it looks like your missus and her mother 361 00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:41,520 are on the chateau collapso. 362 00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:47,560 Now, ladies and gentlemen, there is a weirdo in our community. 363 00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:49,520 Yeah, and she's wearing a lilac shirt. 364 00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:52,240 And drinking cheap wine! 365 00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:54,400 Sh! 366 00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:58,880 Well, that's about all I can show you. 367 00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:03,480 We do have a downstairs toilet, but that's for family only. 368 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:04,960 So, what do you think? 369 00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:09,000 We like it. We like it a lot. 370 00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:13,040 Oh... If you're looking for the tennis court that's in the advert, 371 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:14,520 that was a misprint. 372 00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:19,600 So we've got the place to ourselves, then, yeah? 373 00:16:19,600 --> 00:16:21,320 I'm not that kind of girl. 374 00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:26,160 The room's available by the night, not by the hour. 375 00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:30,800 Spacious, practical, somewhat roomy, tidy. 376 00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,840 Are you OK? 377 00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:36,560 Thanks for asking. I certainly am not. 378 00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:39,560 Now, where do you keep your weapons? 379 00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:41,000 I don't have any weapons. 380 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,840 Oh, do you hear that? She says she doesn't have any weapons. 381 00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:45,960 I know, I heard her, do it! 382 00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:48,520 Really? Yes. Uh-oh! Ooh! 383 00:16:50,320 --> 00:16:52,080 Who are you fuckin' talking to? 384 00:16:58,200 --> 00:17:00,760 AUDIENCE GASP 385 00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:02,040 Oh... 386 00:17:05,560 --> 00:17:08,520 Right, that's about it now. You have to go now. 387 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:10,360 Oh, OK. 388 00:17:10,360 --> 00:17:11,920 OK. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. 389 00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:13,360 I'm going nowhere! 390 00:17:13,360 --> 00:17:15,280 AUDIENCE GASP 391 00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:16,640 Who's shouting, Mammy? 392 00:17:16,640 --> 00:17:17,760 Cathy, call the police. 393 00:17:17,760 --> 00:17:19,920 I wouldn't do that if I were you. 394 00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:21,360 Is that a gun, Mammy? 395 00:17:21,360 --> 00:17:23,560 No, Cathy, it's a fuckin' cheese grater. 396 00:17:26,240 --> 00:17:28,280 And I'm doing jazz hands. 397 00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:35,120 We must do something as a community. 398 00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:36,640 Well, where's Mrs Brown? 399 00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:37,920 She's not here. 400 00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:40,000 Agnes must be included. I'll fetch her. 401 00:17:41,320 --> 00:17:44,760 Volunteers for the posse meet back here in one hour. 402 00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:46,640 Bring a torch and light refreshment. 403 00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:49,920 OK, everyone, please finish your drinks 404 00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:51,680 and return to your homes immediately. 405 00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:52,720 MURMURING 406 00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:54,760 Hey, hey! Stop scaring my customers. 407 00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:56,320 What's all that about? 408 00:17:56,320 --> 00:17:58,600 Sharon was saying some fella was being transported to 409 00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:00,040 ultra-high security. 410 00:18:00,040 --> 00:18:01,640 It has to be Slasher Sam. 411 00:18:01,640 --> 00:18:03,920 The cops were in here showing pictures of him yesterday. 412 00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:05,520 Right, listen, I'm heading to Donegal to try 413 00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:07,080 and smooth over this domestic. 414 00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:09,560 See you later.Good luck with that. 415 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:11,520 I hate having rows with girlfriends. 416 00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:14,960 Really, Buster? What's the longest you've ever had a lover's tiff? 417 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:17,440 11 days. 418 00:18:17,440 --> 00:18:19,000 And then she deflated. 419 00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:25,480 Seriously, though, yeah, she did. 420 00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:29,600 This is not a laughing matter. 421 00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:31,880 Ah, relax, Maria. Take a chill pill. 422 00:18:32,840 --> 00:18:35,840 If this animal is not brought to justice, we're all in peril! 423 00:18:35,840 --> 00:18:37,760 Maria, Dublin's a big place. 424 00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:39,480 What makes you think he'd come to Finglas? 425 00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:40,920 Because Mother saw him! 426 00:18:40,920 --> 00:18:42,240 Really? Where? 427 00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:44,680 She was walking down the alley near the bank and... 428 00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:47,800 ..this man appeared out of the darkness right in front of her! 429 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,600 Oh, my God! He must've been terrified! 430 00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:02,480 It's only me, Agnes, love! 431 00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:05,080 Shhhh! Don't point the gun, it's not nice! 432 00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:06,480 Shut up! I know what I'm doing! 433 00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:07,960 You! Call her! 434 00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:11,880 Winnie! Run! Run! 435 00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:22,240 We were worried about you, Agnes, not turning up in Foley's. 436 00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:23,360 Ah... 437 00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:26,360 Hello, who are you now? 438 00:19:26,360 --> 00:19:30,480 I'm the man who's going to kill you if you don't do exactly what I say. 439 00:19:30,480 --> 00:19:32,320 Jesus, that's a long name! 440 00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,120 I'm with him, sorry. Shut up! Sit down! 441 00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:40,000 Jesus, Mary and holy Saint Joseph, 442 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,840 and the donkey that carried them all to Bethlehem! 443 00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:49,320 Well, I'm not joining any posse. 444 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:51,680 Damien, do you want to go to the movies? 445 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:54,560 Yeah, let's do that, but let's pick the right one. 446 00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:56,600 That one you picked the last time was so sad, 447 00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:58,800 I cried all the way home. 448 00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:00,200 It was Barbie. 449 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,480 I know. 450 00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:04,080 I'm heading up to Mammy's if you want a lift. 451 00:20:04,080 --> 00:20:05,760 Oh, great. I want to drop my bag off. 452 00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,760 And, Damien, you can get changed if you want to. 453 00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:09,760 No, I'm grand as I am. 454 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:23,360 DOORBELL RINGS 455 00:20:23,360 --> 00:20:25,960 Ohhh... Uh-oh. Oh, there's somebody at the door. 456 00:20:25,960 --> 00:20:28,760 Oh, dear. Oh, dear. I know, I heard it! Shut up! 457 00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:33,000 Oh, I know - why don't you get the ugly one to answer the door? 458 00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:39,200 Winnie, you're up! 459 00:20:41,080 --> 00:20:43,880 You, answer the door! 460 00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:45,360 Feckin'... 461 00:20:46,360 --> 00:20:48,440 Nothing wrong with his eyesight anyway. 462 00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:56,560 Bono, you said you were bringing Tallulah. 463 00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:57,920 Ah, she couldn't make it. 464 00:20:57,920 --> 00:20:59,400 Bono, this is not a good time. 465 00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:01,040 Why don't you come back a bit later? 466 00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:02,960 You, hands up. 467 00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,800 What the hell? 468 00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:07,480 Excuse me, this is my lad. 469 00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:09,680 If you want him, you'll have to go through me. 470 00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:10,880 AUDIENCE: Aww. 471 00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:13,320 I'll shoot. 472 00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:15,000 You're on your own, son. 473 00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:24,200 Is this really happening? 474 00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,080 Un-buckin'-believable. 475 00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:28,720 Hostages. 476 00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:31,600 In my own house. 477 00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:38,960 She's sittin' in my buckin' chair. 478 00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:44,080 Mammy, will you shut up about the chair? 479 00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:45,680 I never sit here. 480 00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:48,880 We have more important things to be worrying about! 481 00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:53,960 Have you ever been held hostage before, Hilliary? 482 00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:55,440 Don't be ridiculous. 483 00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:57,440 I didn't grow up in Finglas. 484 00:21:57,440 --> 00:21:59,520 AUDIENCE GASP 485 00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:01,320 I hope he shoots her first. 486 00:22:03,880 --> 00:22:06,680 If I get the gun, I'll buckin' shoot her meself. 487 00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:08,640 DOORBELL RINGS 488 00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:08,640 Shhh! Someone's coming. 489 00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:11,680 You, ugly, door! 490 00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:14,800 For fuck's sake. 491 00:22:19,640 --> 00:22:21,320 Quick question, Mr Slasher. 492 00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:27,120 When I return, can we review the seating arrangements? 493 00:22:27,120 --> 00:22:29,640 Move it! Move it! 494 00:22:27,120 --> 00:22:29,640 DOORBELL RINGS 495 00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:32,360 What is this place? The community centre?! 496 00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:37,200 Hello. I'm collecting for the local brass band. 497 00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:38,520 Two, three, four! 498 00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:39,680 MUSIC: William Tell Overture 499 00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:41,080 Oh, Jesus... 500 00:22:41,080 --> 00:22:43,120 AUDIENCE CLAP ALONG 501 00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:53,680 Winnie. Psst. 502 00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:58,520 No, thanks, Agnes. I went before I left Foley's. 503 00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:04,760 Offer the man a cup of tea. 504 00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:06,040 Why? 505 00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:08,960 Because when he thinks you're still in the kitchen...Yeah. 506 00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:11,000 ..I'll distract him. 507 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:12,680 Good idea, Agnes. 508 00:23:15,240 --> 00:23:17,600 What are you two talking about? 509 00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:20,640 Would... Would you... Would you like a cup of tea? 510 00:23:20,640 --> 00:23:21,760 No. 511 00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:24,120 Please? I said no! 512 00:23:25,360 --> 00:23:28,760 Well, I guess that's that, then, Agnes. 513 00:23:28,760 --> 00:23:30,320 I could kill a coffee, though. 514 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:32,160 It's tea or take a hike... Winnie! 515 00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:38,600 Get the man a cup of coffee. 516 00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:39,800 Do you want one, Agnes? 517 00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:41,440 No! 518 00:23:41,440 --> 00:23:42,760 Anyone else for tea or...? 519 00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:46,000 Winnie, get the man a coffee, he's parched! 520 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:49,680 Come on. Move it. 521 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:56,200 Slasher, with all this running around, you must be exhausted. 522 00:23:56,200 --> 00:23:58,640 Yeah, I am a bit tired, yeah. 523 00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:00,520 Come over here and take the weight off. 524 00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:03,040 Come on. Have a seat there. 525 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:04,480 Are you sure you're not going to try anything? 526 00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:05,960 Oh, not at all. 527 00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:07,960 Get up. 528 00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:11,560 So, tell us a little bit about yourself. 529 00:24:11,560 --> 00:24:13,120 Well... 530 00:24:13,120 --> 00:24:15,440 Nothing to tell, really. 531 00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:16,920 Do you take sugar? 532 00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:20,080 Winnie! Just go! 533 00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,560 Go? Go where? Where's she going? 534 00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:26,640 She's going to the kettle, you know, to get your coffee. Remember? 535 00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:28,240 Any chance of a quick cuppa, Ma? 536 00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:30,520 No, you stay where you are. 537 00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:31,880 What's going on, Ma? 538 00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:34,880 Do you mean the man with the gun or the brass band? 539 00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:40,000 He's holding us hostage! 540 00:24:41,080 --> 00:24:42,920 Stop the lights. 541 00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:44,840 Is that Slasher Byrne? 542 00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:46,840 Birdie Flanagan? 543 00:24:46,840 --> 00:24:48,760 I haven't seen ya in years. 544 00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:50,000 AUDIENCE:Oooh! 545 00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:51,480 You're looking well. 546 00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:53,480 Thanks. 547 00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:54,520 Pilates. 548 00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,360 I do the Zumba meself. Ah. 549 00:24:59,360 --> 00:25:02,360 I'm sorry to interrupt your romantic reunion, 550 00:25:02,360 --> 00:25:04,560 but how do you two know each other? 551 00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:06,280 We dated back in the day, Agnes. 552 00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:09,520 Yeah, a long time ago. 553 00:25:09,520 --> 00:25:12,760 Good times, though. I can't seem to remember why we broke up. 554 00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:14,840 You cheated on me! 555 00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:17,160 AUDIENCE GASP 556 00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:18,720 Yeah, that sounds like me. 557 00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:21,480 With my brother. 558 00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:23,880 AUDIENCE GASP 559 00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:25,440 Yep. 560 00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:27,560 It's all coming back now. 561 00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:28,920 Where would you like me? 562 00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:30,200 Get on the couch. 563 00:25:31,360 --> 00:25:32,960 AUDIENCE:Oooh! 564 00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:34,080 How is everyone? 565 00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:35,440 Terrified. 566 00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:38,320 Well, there's no need to be, Cathy, because it'll be over soon. 567 00:25:38,320 --> 00:25:39,880 Oh, yeah? How do you know? 568 00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:44,320 Because, oddball, as we speak, my friend Winnie is informing 569 00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:46,480 the authorities of your whereabouts. 570 00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:48,000 You said she was making coffee. 571 00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:51,520 That was just a clever rouse, just to distract you. 572 00:25:51,520 --> 00:25:53,200 One cup of coffee. 573 00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:03,800 Shoot her! Shoot her! 574 00:26:05,080 --> 00:26:06,720 Anyone here? 575 00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:08,200 Are you fuckin' kidding me? 576 00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:09,680 No! 577 00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:11,920 Hello, all. 578 00:26:11,920 --> 00:26:13,120 How are you, Slasher Sam? 579 00:26:13,120 --> 00:26:15,120 Oh, hi, Buster. How are you? 580 00:26:15,120 --> 00:26:17,400 Don't talk to him. Sorry. OK. Uh-oh. 581 00:26:19,160 --> 00:26:20,480 What's going on? 582 00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:21,760 We're being held hostage. 583 00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:23,840 Yeah, I've got a gun. 584 00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:26,400 That's not a real gun. That's a water pistol. 585 00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:28,160 It's a gun, you little shit. 586 00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:29,680 Water pistol. Gun! 587 00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:31,600 Water pistol. Gun! 588 00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:33,320 Prove it. 589 00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:37,240 AUDIENCE GASP 590 00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:37,240 Go on. Prove it. 591 00:26:37,240 --> 00:26:38,920 Yeah, go on. 592 00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,320 OK. 593 00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:43,480 Yeah, that's a gun. 594 00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:46,720 Hey, that's my da! 595 00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:47,760 Ugh! 596 00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:50,440 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 597 00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:52,160 Party's over, buddy! 598 00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:54,240 You're going upriver. 599 00:26:54,240 --> 00:26:55,760 I always wanted to say that. 600 00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:01,240 Good man, Buster. 601 00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:02,760 Argh! 602 00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:07,920 You're lucky the police came. 603 00:27:07,920 --> 00:27:09,400 I was going to give it to ya. 604 00:27:15,360 --> 00:27:16,680 Do you want a cup of tea, love? 605 00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:17,960 No, thanks. 606 00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:19,440 That was a hell of a day. 607 00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:20,640 I'm going to bed. 608 00:27:21,680 --> 00:27:25,560 Just promise me - no more room for rent? 609 00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:27,760 This is not a B&B, Mammy. 610 00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:29,760 It's our home. 611 00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:31,200 I promise. 612 00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:32,600 Goodnight, love. 613 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:37,480 You know, Cathy's right. That was a hell of a day. 614 00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:43,520 Maybe just a few minutes more. 615 00:27:43,520 --> 00:27:46,040 HE MOANS 616 00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:53,000 You know, as I looked around that room, I realised something. 617 00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:57,040 I was surrounded, you know, by family and friends and Hidily. 618 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:01,920 And I realised that's really what's important. 619 00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:06,320 So it's a new year - plenty to look forward to, family visits, 620 00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:08,680 a few drinks with friends, 621 00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:11,720 and maybe even a feckin' funeral! 622 00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:13,360 SHE LAUGHS 623 00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:15,880 Goodnight. 624 00:28:15,880 --> 00:28:17,480 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 625 00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:19,520 MUSIC: Auld Lang Syne 626 00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:48,040 Goodnight! Happy New Year! 627 00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:54,360 SHE LAUGHS 628 00:28:54,410 --> 00:28:58,960 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 43467

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.