Original subtitles

Call midwife, call Santi, text Mum,

time contractions, birthing plan, go bag.

Snacks, books, headphones.

Snacks, books, headphones,

paperwork, keys, wallet, phone.

Snacks, book, headphones, paperwork, keys, wallet, phone.

Are those... chops?

OLY: Mm-hm.

Call midwife, call... Santi,

text Mum,

time contractions, birthing plan, go bag.

Oh, fuck.

Call midwife, call Santi,

text Mum,

time contractions, birthing plan, hospital go bag.

Snacks, books, headphones, paperwork, keys, wallet, phone.

REEMA: But that means something.

If he comes to me in a dream, that means something.

Haven't they all come to you in dreams?

No.

Who, Vince?

Not like this.

Dream Rakim is different.

We have this...

Don't say it. I know.

"Don't get obsessed, Reema. Don't get married, Reema."

- Rah, rah, rah. - (OLY CHUCKLES)

Don't worry, OK? I'm not gonna lose my mind over this one.

No.

But also, you already have.

- Oh, no. - SANTI: Hey, sorry to interrupt.

Just gonna grab my gym stuff and then we are off.

Who's we?

- Oh. - Me. Hi!

Hello. Hello!

Hey.

- It's good to see you. - (GROANS AWKWARDLY)

VINCE: So, you're back.

How are you?

- REEMA: Good. You? - Good.

Wow, I'm good too.

This is crazy.

We spoke the other day

and you're on the other side of the world?

Yeah, crazy.

Yeah. You didn't mention you were coming home.

Kind of a last-minute decision, actually.

After we spoke.

Oh.

Hey, Vince.

- Hey, Oly. - OLY: Hi.

- You good? - Good.

- Good. You good? - I'm good.

- Good. - Everybody is... good.

So you're boxing again?

Yeah. Yeah, we're gonna...

Reems, are you staying another night or...

Nope. I have plans.

So you can have your wife back.

Ah. Lucky me.

OK. Well, I'll come over and say 'bye.

Love you.

SANTI: Mwah.

Are you... Have you been eating meat?

Vince, could you make sure that Santi

doesn't get punched in the head?

What I can do

is make sure he does get punched in the head...

...by me.

See youse!

SANTI: Hey, you can't touch what you can't see, brother.

(CHUCKLES) You've gotta get better coordination. (PANTS)

See you, guys.

- Did you see that? - Mmm.

A few months ago, that, seeing Vince,

would have derailed my whole week.

- Mmm. - Not even a raised heart rate.

Wait. So you didn't tell him that you were back?

No. Why would I?

I've been ranting.

You're going through some major life events

and I want to hear about them.

- It's OK. - Work must be intense.

It's just a lot happening.

And how can you get excited about the baby

when your mum's going through chemo?

So you're stressed, and then you feel guilty about being stressed

because stress is bad for the baby,

and that would make you stress more.

(PHONE CHIMES)

Oh, my God, he wants to get brunch.

Hey!

And once again, my dream is a prophecy.

What are you doing today? Anything exciting?

Um, well, I've got the day off.

So I'm going to be using a medical balloon

to stretch my vagina

so that I don't tear my perineum while giving birth.

Oh, nice.

(AIR HISSES)

(AIR HISSES)

(SIGHS)

(BALLOON SQUEAKS)

Hey.

Fuck, sorry. Just... don't mind me.

- What happened? - Oh, I forgot my wraps.

The ones at the gym are manky.

- No, to your lip. - I split it.

Does it look cool?

Does it need stitches?

No, no, no, it's OK. I, um...

I got my first sparring session this afternoon at 2:30.

Do you wanna come?

Let me at least get you... a band-aid.

And ice.

(SANTI SNORTS)

Were you masturbating?

I wish.

- Vince did that? - Yeah.

It's good for him to get some of his break-up rage out.

Him and Van broke up?

- Yeah. - Is he alright?

Yeah, he's fine.

She was no good for him anyway.

OLY: She was alright.

So who broke up with who?

Uh, I don't know. I didn't ask.

Yeah, 'cause why would you?

Hey.

Are you sure that now is a good time to be getting your face...

(PLAYFUL SOUND EFFECTS ON TV)

Is someone watching TV?

I forgot to tell you - the school called.

Jay's got nits.

(LOUDLY) What?!

I've got nits again.

Yeah, surely this information

was more important than the glove stuff.

It's alright, Jay, we're gonna do a rinse.

You're gonna be fine.

- (PHONE RINGS) - Oh, God.

SANTI: OK, I really gotta go. Kill those nits, guys.

OLY: Hey.

Are you gonna come watch me at 2:30?

What? Uh, well, maybe.

Um, no, no, no. Hi, Shauna.

Now... is a great time. What's up?

Why can I not just keep them?

They obviously love me.

Nothing lives on your head without your consent.

Your body, your rules, remember?

- I give you my consent. - No, you don't.

Hey, ladies.

Ooh, beauty spa day? We love self-care.

- Come here, JJ. - Jay's got nits.

Oh!

- Nits? - OLY: Mm-hm.

OK, well, I was just getting my things.

I won't be long.

Where's the famous Rakim?

- RAKIM: Hey! - Oh! Hi.

Sorry, I was gonna wait outside,

but she wanted me to prove I'm real.

That's OK. Um, would you like a cup of tea?

- I was gonna make one. - Sure. Yeah.

Also, we don't usually...

It's... been a morning.

Hey.

What are you drawing?

Are you Reema's new boyfriend?

Um, I'm Rakim.

What's your name?

So you and Reema have been, like, friends for ages.

- Yeah, since Year 7. - Oh.

Do you have any tips or...

Do you mean, like, how to handle her?

More like how to keep her.

Hmm.

- (PHONE RINGS) - Sorry.

Hey, Shauna, I just sent you the breakdown.

- (SHAUNA SHOUTS OVER PHONE) - Well, wait a second.

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Slow down.

And maybe move the phone

a little bit further away from your mouth.

OK. OK.

- Wait, why? - By tomorrow!

- Tomorrow? Well... - Yes, exactly!

OK, well, then we have no choice. We're gonna...

Yes, we can. We...

We are microforest experts, Shauna. We can do this.

I'm not doing it!

- OK. Yes. - (PHONE BEEPS)

Hang on. Shauna, I'm getting a call from my mum.

Can I call you back?

(SHAUNA CONTINUES RANTING INDISTINCTLY)

- Hi, Mum. - ANGIE: Hey, darling.

(WHISPERS) Thank you.

Um, is everything... Uh, could you wait? Hold on.

REEMA: Ready?

- 'Bye. - OLY: 'Bye.

RAKIM: See ya.

ANGIE: I've got an eye problem that feels very, very...

Yeah?

- (ALARM CHIMES) - Oh, what?

Jay, I'm gonna need you to go to the shower and wash that off.

- One more minute. - Jay?

You have to wash it out too!

Fuck.

Um, hey, Mum. Is everything OK? You sound...

ANGIE: Are you listening to me now?

Because I really need your help. I think I'm going blind.

- What? - I'm going blind!

OK.

She says that they're full,

but if it's urgent, we can go to Emergency.

It's not an emergency.

Edith thinks I'm overreacting.

Well, that's gaslighting.

Um, blurred vision.

Uh, painful flashes.

ANGIE: No, no, not about the eye. About Barbara.

Who's Barbara?

The woman that she cheated on me with!

You mean after you left her and she went to Canada?

Um, do you have any other symptoms?

Yeah, but different... different vision in each eye.

She's got different vision in each eye.

She misses Barbara, but she won't admit it.

Of course she misses her.

Barbara isn't radioactive and dying, is she?

It's not just men who leave

their cancer-stricken partners, you know?

Why can't she just support me?

She's just finished treatment for breast cancer.

Could that have anything to do with the impaired vision?

(FLAPS LIPS)

OK. Yep.

Yep.

OK, I'll give them a call. Thank you. Thanks.

OK, she says it could be a number of things.

Here, Mum, do you want this tea?

Did she say brain tumour? 'Cause that's what Google said.

Cancer, breast cancer, can metastasise to the brain.

You've just finished chemo.

And Google says that everything is a brain tumour.

BOWIE: Who's got a brain tumour?

No-one!

Bowie, put pants on

and go help Jay remove her shampoo in the sink.

That's gonna have to come out.

Uh, can I just say hello to my mother, please?

No, can you please comb through all of her nits?

Make sections and be very thorough.

Yeah, righto.

But I will need you to help me with something later

that could well change the trajectory of my life.

Deal? Olympia, deal, deal?

Deal!

Thank you.

Hi, um, I would like to make an appointment.

Uh, it's not an emergency.

Um, but it is quite urgent.

Uh, well, we need... we need to play to his ego.

ANGIE: Worse.

Well, he could sell the block to developers

or he could gift the community a living legacy.

Worse.

Worse.

Worse.

OLY: Mmm, but if we just make it all about him.

ANGIE: Thank you.

Can you read that?

Uh... A, I, Q, Z, E.

Good.

Hey, can I call you back, Shauna?

Oh, sorry, darling. It's hard not to spiral.

OLY: It's OK.

I can tell you there's nothing wrong with your vision.

So the problem is neurological.

DOCTOR: It means you've crossed off one potential cause.

OLY: Well, we'll just keep crossing things off.

I'll call your oncologist.

ANGIE: No, no, you don't do that, darling.

I'll do that. You've got your forest to do.

How did you know I was here?

I'm sorry. About before.

Oly, did you...

Look, can I just do this?

You know, I'm... We're not good at apologising.

Lesbians?

Lawyers.

(SIGHS)

I lashed out before

because the idea that I would leave you for anyone

is so utterly, utterly ridiculous.

It makes me furious that you would entertain the thought.

I'm lucky that I get to support you.

And that's why I'm here.

Wow.

That was a perfect apology.

Suspiciously perfect.

Sure you don't need me?

No, you go, darling. Thank you.

(OLY CLICKS TONGUE)

BOWIE: Ooh, ooh! Hey.

So I did the nit treatment.

Mum needs a brain scan.

Cool. Can we do my thing now, though?

Did you hear what I just said?

Yeah, yeah, but, like, it's just a precaution, right?

Yes, and precautions exist because bad things might happen.

Yeah. (SIGHS)

OK, what do you want?

Why are you wearing... that hat?

Yeah, I need you to help me film an audition and read some lines.

I can't act.

Pff! Come off it.

You'll be great! It'll be five minutes. You'll be off camera.

It's fine. Come on.

- Are you rolling? - What's rolling?

Have you hit 'record'? Hit 'record'.

(BEEP!)

OLY: Rolling.

- Hmm? - Oh.

Um...

"You're under contract, Mulligan."

(BOWIE SCOFFS) Mate, your contract means nothin'.

This whole building's a lawsuit waitin' to happen,

and all it'd take would be one person goin' to the press.

"You wouldn't dare."

That depends.

I'm sure we could come to some sort of

mutually beneficial arrangement, don't you think?

"Chuckling humour... humourlessly."

Oh, wait, that's...

Ha-ha-ha-ha.

"Look who's decided to join the ranks of the big dogs.

"You've got some nerve, Mulligan.

"Have you forgotten who runs this town?

"Are you sure you're ready to play hardball?"

Yep. Great! That was great. Thanks, Ol. Um...

Should I be angrier?

(CHUCKLES)

(SHOUTS) "Look who's decided to join the ranks of the big dogs!"

I mean, it's... Look, it's good.

It's just, you know, you are... like, you are...

I feel bad. You're busy, you know?

- Oh, it's OK. - Don't worry about it.

No, don't worry about it. I'll get JJ, if she wants to help.

Jay can't play a corrupt alcoholic mayor.

Yes, I can.

JJ, right here with me, alright?

OK.

(AMERICAN ACCENT) "You're under contract, Mulligan."

(LAUGHS) Mate,

this whole building is a lawsuit waitin' to happen.

Sorry, you threw me. That was good.

Can we just, like... straight from the top again?

I like that energy.

Alright, well, I might...

- Ol! Ol! - ...head out.

We're roll... Yeah.

Go. Shh, shh.

Alright, JJ, this is good. This is really good.

Alright, that? Strong choice. Let's go.

"You're under contract, Mulligan!"

(PUNCHES THUD, SHOES SQUEAK)

(SPARSE MUSIC)

VINCE: Welcome, welcome, welcome.

- Hello! - Yeah.

Wow.

It's, um, very... medieval.

VINCE: Yeah. (CHUCKLES)

I mean, it could be worse.

He could be getting high and playing Xbox.

(SHOUTS) Use your jabs, Santi!

- He's just lacking his jabs. - Mmm.

- Oh, hey. - Hey.

Santi told me about you and Van.

Who's that?

Never met her.

Are you OK?

Just wasn't meant to be.

You shouldn't be with someone you argue with nonstop.

I guess, like, Santi didn't like her.

We did have a good couple of weeks.

Yeah. He shouldn't have said that.

VINCE: Yeah.

Could have done without the high five

after I told him it was over.

- He high-fived you? - Yeah.

Oh, my God.

Hey, um...

Why is...

Why is Reema back?

She's back because she's seeing Rakim.

Cool.

Happy for her.

Happy for her.

Mmm. Yep.

(GRUNTS)

Hey, Ol.

Ooh.

Hey.

Do you guys do tea?

See, once you get your defence down pat...

- Bro, I've got my defence. - Yeah.

VINCE: Duck and weave, right here.

- There's a prize, mate. - Yeah, I can tell that, eh?

OK, so tell me. What is it?

Explain this to me.

Is it the adrenaline? Is it the danger?

The pain? Violence?

BOTH: Yeah.

It's just so hyper-masculine.

OK.

Why is something that's hyper-masculine

automatically bad?

Well, you're just covering for a fear of losing your virility.

- What is... - (MUTTERS) Virility?

Are you afraid to get a dad bod?

Oh, yeah. Sure.

Seriously?

SANTI: Why...

Did you just come here to make fun of us?

No, I'm curious. I'm curious.

You don't have to be defensive.

You know, the thing is you don't have to understand it.

Like, we don't have to get

everything the other person does.

There can be a little bit of independence.

There can be a little bit of, like, "This is just for me."

It's cardio. It's fitness.

It's being healthy so I can

be around for a long time for my kids.

I don't see the problem with me wanting to box.

- Every day? - Not every day.

It's every single day.

OK, ding-ding-ding!

You guys are both champions.

Cheers.

Sorry to interrupt.

Um, I was just wondering

if you knew the medical research

in regards to drinking while pregnant?

Yep.

And you're comfortable with it?

Not as comfortable as you are policing women's bodies.

I'm just making sure you're aware of the risks.

Oh, no, I'm aware of the risks, thank you.

This is why this is a non-alcoholic beer.

Unlike the heroin I'll be shooting up later,

which will be 100% real.

Cheers.

VINCE: Oh! (LAUGHS)

SANTI: 10-8 round to Ollie.

- We need milk. - SANTI: It's off.

- (JAY SHRIEKS) - What's wrong?

What happened to your face?

Oh, I was just play-fighting with Tio Vince.

It's OK, it doesn't hurt. It's fine.

Why did he do it?

Yeah, why did Vince give you a black eye and a split lip?

We... we were playing.

You said I wasn't allowed to hit people.

You said we solve our problems with words.

We do.

That is what we do.

Next time I see Vince,

I'm gonna punch him in the face so hard.

SHAUNA: Alright. Alright, Olympic Games.

It's time to do this.

Let's convince this old fella to give us that valuable property

so we can build a little rat motel.

- OK, what's going on? - Ooh.

What's happening right now?

Are you having a baby? Are you gonna have it right now?

- Uh-uh. - 'Cause can you please not?

I think it's just false labour pains.

Ah!

- Ooh! - OK. Alright.

Um, how could you know that it was false?

I think we should probably get you to the hospital.

No, it's going. It's going.

No, I'm... I'm...

I'm fine.

- OK, tell your face that. - No, I'm good. I'm fine.

No, I think we need to get you to the hospital.

- Don't be stupid. - Ooh, OK.

The, um, the micro...

SHAUNA: Yes, OK.

I understand, and I love your tenacity,

but you know what isn't going to let us get this over the line?

- Mmm? - Baby!

Right in the middle of the meeting room on his shoes, OK?

So you are going to go to the hospital.

OK, but you don't have to drive me.

I'm obviously not driving you.

Yuck.

Alright, Uber's here in three minutes.

- OK, thank you. - It's OK.

Do you want me to wait with you or...

- (EXHALES) - Probably not, I assume.

OK.

OK, I will wait.

Who knew that a microforest would be

such a macro pain in the arse?

Or... cervix, womb... general area.

(GRUNTS SOFTLY)

SANTI: Hey, you've reached Santi. You know what to do.

(BEEP!)

(PHONE LINE RINGS)

ANGIE: Hello, you've reached Angie. Please leave a message.

(PHONE LINE RINGS)

REEMA: Hi, this is Reema. Leave a message after the tone.

Oly?

- Oh! Van. - Come on through.

It was like a pretty standard Braxton Hicks.

Irregular contractions, discomfort,

tightness in the upper abdomen.

Probably just overreacting

because I'm hyper aware of this pregnancy.

Oh, right, you had the cryptic pregnancy the first time.

Right, Vince told me.

I was sorry to hear about you and Vince.

Eh, we weren't really a thing. (CHUCKLES)

Yeah, but still, break-ups suck.

Mmm.

Sounds like Braxton Hicks to me too.

I'll get your file sent over to your GP.

Let me get this off you.

You are free to leave.

You know, we were...

...almost a thing.

Which is what sucks.

If there was something there, I guess we'll kind of never know.

You never know what the future holds.

VAN: I do.

I'm dating some really great people at the moment

and I am happy!

I will be. (CHUCKLES)

(SOBS)

Do you want a...

VAN: Yeah.

(VAN SOBS)

Santi?

Bowie?

ROSA: Hello, Oly?

Rosa? I thought I called Santi.

Santi's in the hospital.

Wait, what?

Yeah, no, don't worry.

What happened? Are you OK?

ROSA: He got knocked out.

- Oh, my God. - No, only for a minute.

And they've run the tests.

He has a mild concussion.

Oly, you have to monitor him

because if anything changes, he has to come straight back here.

OK, it's fine. I'm not that bad.

At once.

You know, Muhammad Ali,

he never got knocked out once in his entire career.

GABE: Yeah, neither did Mayweather.

I don't wanna listen anymore about boxing or fighting.

Now, you have to promise me to take it easy.

OLY: Take it easy?

All he does is box and draw.

Well, no more of that.

- Just rest and relaxation! - SANTI: It's nothing.

Seriously, guys, I'm fine.

ROSA: Oly, you will take care of him, won't you?

Oh, yeah, I'll take care of him.

- (CAR HORN TOOTS ON TV) - (CHUCKLES)

(LAUGHS)

Such an idiot.

I'd like a cup of tea.

Tea, please.

But my concussion.

I thought you said it was nothing.

I did go to the hospital.

And do you know who else went to hospital today?

Me.

What?

I thought I was going into labour,

so I went to the hospital - by myself.

And then I went back to work

to convince a bazillionaire to give us a vacant lot,

which I did while pretending I wasn't having contractions.

And you know who was the only person

who was concerned about me at all?

Van.

That's not even true. I comforted her.

Why wouldn't you tell me this, Oly?

I'm trying to tie up everything before I go on leave

and I'm worried about my husband,

who continues to deliberately get himself smashed in the face.

And I'm worried about my mum, who's recovering from cancer

and is now totally freaked out that she has even more cancer.

And I just feel totally alone.

Which is crazy, considering I have a whole person inside me

all the time.

So that is why I want a fucking cup of tea!

Oly, I promise you I will never box again.

No, that's not... Arrgh!

- SANTI: What? - (SIGHS)

I want you to do your stupid boxing. You love it.

SANTI: Hey.

You know what I love more?

I just wanna be able to punch someone.

SANTI: I know.

And I want to be able to drink

and... eat cheese and...

(SIGHS)

What else can't I do?

Go on roller-coasters.

(TENDER MUSIC)

I don't want to be the fun police. I just want...

I just want you to be...

Here.

Aha!

Ah!

- So when's the scan? - ANGIE: Monday.

SANTI: That feels pretty good.

Home gym complete.

Are you scared?

Edith said we can only react to facts, not possibilities.

Or did you tell her to say that?

No, that one's all hers.

Pretty good at that, Angie.

Wait till you see me.

SANTI: Ooh, OK.

Show me what you got.

Ooh!

Come on, get me.

Actually try and get me.

Oh!

(LAUGHS)

That was an accident!

Was it?

(MOCKINGLY) Oh, you need to go to the hospital?

No.

Does Santi need a little kiss

from all of his family and his 'fwiends'?

No. Stop, Oly.

(LAUGHS) Put 'em up.

SANTI: Come and get me.

('PULSE' BY THE MESS HALL)

? I want the sun in the sky now

? My brain was all I ever felt in my head

? And what gathered in the distance

? Gathered north, east, south, and west like a shadow

? Staggers in the headlight

? It could be easy just to crawl into the next life

? Bold as a boy can be

? The military standing on the sidewalk, looking at me

? Just raising my arms

? To a chromatic sky

? While the devil rides high

? Or away, away to move into the next life

? A shot crashed, then a valley of fire

? And my head is a picture built to decay

? And everything I ever had falling away

? I'm burning so fast... ?

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