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Your housekeeper. Man, she came on to me!

You're married, Bill.

Shit, I don't want to be married.

Previously on "Bruh"...

Did you file for the restraining order?

- Yes, I did. - We goin' over there.

Your boy is not into me.

He's just going through a lot right now.

- He's straight, right? - Yes.

I don't know if I can do it.

Either you get with it or you don't,

but don't waste my fucking time.

What kind of man don't like dogs?

This man don't like dogs.

Does all of this really make you that crazy?

Yes!

What we gotta do to meet up?

- That's a lot of food. - Mmmm!

That's what I do.

Why are you coming out of the bathroom like that?

Damn.

- He don't like you? - No.

You don't like her?

Look, I'm goin'-- I'mma go for a run, all right?

Really? Right before dinner?

Uh, I--I can eat it later.

I cooked a whole meal.

I mean, you know, pork?

I don't really do that, so...

Well, that's just rude.

No, it's not rude, remember? I'm a vegan?

Bill.

Look, you need to let me go run.

- Okay. - I don't like this.

No, he needs to leave. Let him.

You look like you just showered. And now you're going for a run?

Pamela...

What? I'm just stating the facts.

- Look, I cooked a whole meal. - Exactly.

- This is rude. - Mm-hmm.

Your run can't wait?

- He needs to go. - Yes, I do.

Bye, ladies. Enjoy your food, all right?

- Bye. - Mm-hmm.

Shit!

Mm, mm, mm, mm.

Ma...

I'm with your mother.

Why would he come out after taking a shower

and leave right after?

Mm-hmm, tell her.

You need to watch him.

I'm not doing that.

Not doing what?

Following him.

Who said anything about following him?

That's exactly what she was suggesting.

No, I was not.

I think you were, Mama.

No, I was wondering where he was going

and why he needed to shower before he took a run.

Does he do that often, though?

Not since I've been here.

Mama, you just got here.

Well, I hadn't seen it happen.

What? What am I missing?

You know what you're missing?

This meal, so can we eat? I think we should!

You know what?

I know you're my daughter, but you are slippin'.

- No. - What?

She isn't slippin'. She's up to something.

- She is? - Mm-hmm.

Tell us.

I'm not up to anything, okay?

Oh, yeah, you right.

She got that same look on her face

like when I would catch her doing something wrong.

- What is it? - Okay, so tell us!

Nothing! Can we eat?

There's biscuits and stuff.

Okay. She not gonna tell us.

I'll get it out of her.

- Oh, and then you tell me. - Oh, I will.

Whatever.

Like I'm not here.

- This is so good. - Thank you.

If I keep eating like this, I'm gonna be huge.

Well, that's the plan.

I don't--I don't wanna be huge.

Y'all need some meat on your bones.

I hear you.

You do?

Yeah. Things have changed now.

Men still like women with meat on their bones.

Yeah...a little.

Oh, I'm old school?

Okay, well, I think men like your daughter and I just fine.

Yeah, I don't know about that.

Ain't that right, Regina?

- Regina!? - Hm?

Baby, what is it?

It's nothing, okay?

You sure?

Yes, Mama, I'm fine.

Okay.

Y'all keep eating. I'mma take a little siesta.

I love you, Mama!

-I love you too! - Love you too!

I think she's gonna have me fat as hell.

Well, you see me nibbling on this.

I can't eat all that food.

Mm.

What are you looking at?

Hm?

What are you looking at?

Well...

Okay, look at this and tell me what you think.

Are you tracking him?

- Shh! - Oh, I'm sorry.

I don't want my mama to hear that.

- Where is he going? - I don't know.

Who--who do you know in the area?

I don't know anybody over there.

Okay, well, it looks like we need to take a drive.

I'm not doing that.

So you got the damn app to do nothing with it?

I don't want him to find out

that I put the thing on his phone.

- So? - No.

Okay, wait, wait, wait.

So you put it on his phone to track him every day?

Yeah, you know I can't trust that nigga.

- Damn. - Yeah, I know.

This is...

I know, okay?

I hate myself for doing it.

No!

Shit, I was gonna say this is great!

- What? - Yes!

We should go over there.

Girl...

I would blow my whole cover.

Well, what if he's getting blown?

Okay, stop.

No, we don't know that address.

And has he ever been there before?

No.

Okay, so let's go.

- Okay, let's go. - Thank you.

Mama, we'll be back!

Where y'all going?

Well, you know, all this food you got us eating,

we just gonna, you know, walk it off a little bit.

- Whew! - You ain't eat none of it!

I'mma save it for when I get back from the walk.

Okay! Well, thanks for lying and telling me that bullshit.

I hope he ain't with anyone.

- You know what? - Come on, let's go.

Get my jacket.

- We'll be back. -Mm-hmm.

Jesus.

Got me cooking all this shit like I'm a slave.

♪ Navigating through this dating life ♪

♪ Trying to find me a shawty and make her mine ♪

♪ Now, I'll find one in no time ♪

♪ With the help of my homies

♪ I'm going up with my bruhs

♪ The bruhs

♪ I'm goin' up, I'm goin' up ♪

♪ Me and my bruhs

♪ Goin' up, goin' up with the bruhs ♪

♪ Going up

♪ Goin' up, we're goin' up with the bruhs ♪

♪ Ooh, whoa

♪ Goin' up and goin' up with the bruhs ♪

- Hey. - Hey.

You feelin' better?

What's that supposed to mean?

Well, it means you were in such a pissy-ass mood earlier.

I wasn't pissy, man.

Don't say "pissy" to me, all right?

Hm. Okay.

Okay.

Oh, uh, Dina asked me out.

Wait, what?

Yeah, yeah.

So I'm gonna go with her.

Okay.

Have fun.

Just making sure you're cool with it.

I don't want her, man.

Okay, good.

Wait, hold on, wait a minute.

So she just, like, randomly asked you out?

- Yeah, she did. -Just out the blue?

Yeah.

Okay.

So yeah, she's gonna come over.

And then we're gonna walk up the street, get a little drink.

All right.

- Have fun. - All right.

Sure you good with it?

I'm good, all right? I'm cool.

Okay, okay.

All right, tell you what. I'm gonna hop in the shower.

Will you let her in when she gets here?

Yeah, I gotcha.

Oh, um, and I got some wine over here.

Man, are you trying to set me up?

- Like, is she--is she-- - No!

Is she coming over here for me, man?

Not at all, absolutely not!

I told you I'm not trying to talk to her, okay?

- I'm good! - Dude, listen to me.

After the pissy-ass way that you acted--

Stop saying "pissy."

-I would never do that again!

Bro, but just why are you trying to set me up with her?

Like, I told you before, I'm good, all right?

What are you doing? I'm cool, okay?

So please, can you just go take a shower and get out of my face?

Whoa, hey, hey, hey, hey! Do you remember?

This is my place. Don't talk to me like that.

You're right.

Yo, man, what is up with you, bro?

It's just I'm tired of people acting like

I don't know what's best for me, okay?

Like, I'm a grown man, and I feel like

y'all keep trying to butt in on my life.

Like, I got it. I'm good.

I don't need all this extra commentary with it, all right?

- I get it, I get it. - You get what?

-I see what this is. - What?

- What are you talking-- - Your wife did that.

Yes, my ex-wife was just like that, and it pissed me off.

It just really gets under my skin.

Like, just let me live, all right?

All right.

That's over with, okay?

You gotta let that go.

I know.

Okay.

And what you need to understand is that when people like me,

who care about you and have your best interests in mind,

say something, it doesn't mean

we're trying to tell you what to do, okay?

Yeah, you're right.

Okay.

So can I go in the shower,

or are you gonna be pissy about something else?

- Yeah, take a shower, man. -Thank you.

- My bad, my bad, okay? -Thank you.

- My bad. - All right.

- Cool? - Yeah.

Just let her in when she gets here, please?

- Okay, I got you. - Thank you.

-Hi. -Hey.

Thank you for coming.

Uh, yeah, no worries.

I know.

Come on in.

Can I get you a drink?

No, I'm all right.

Come on.

- I guess I'll have one. - Okay.

Here you go.

- Thank you. - You're welcome.

Is this, um...is this your place?

No, it's actually just a place that I clean.

Oh, so this is somebody's house.

No, it's just a space that I keep up.

Okay. Okay. Cool.

But it's not yours.

No, it's not.

Oh, okay.

You're not comfortable.

No, no, it's fine. It is.

- Sit down, relax. - Okay.

Here, let me take your jacket.

You like what you see?

Yeah.

Show me how much, then.

I, um...

What's wrong?

You don't strike me as the shy type.

Well, normally I'm not.

No, no, you're not.

Okay, this, um--this is moving real fast for me.

Do you want me to stop?

I--I don't know.

Okay, well, how about I start?

And you can let me know...

if you want me to stop.

What? Why did you stop?

Oh, you want me to keep going?

I mean, shit, we in it now.

No, baby, you ain't in it yet.

♪ What I got to lose right now ♪

♪ Nothing to prove right now, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ I ain't in the mood right now ♪

♪ Speaking to her right now

♪ Oh, yeah, what I got to lose right now ♪

♪ Nothing to prove right now, oh, yeah ♪

♪ I ain't in the mood right now ♪

♪ Speaking to her right now

♪ Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow ♪

♪ Wow, wow, wow-wow-wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow ♪

Don't say nothin' to me. Let's go.

Ma, I'm not going to that girl job, okay?

Nigga, I'm goin' and you takin' me there.

Ma, I just want to let her go, poof!

Yeah, I want to fuck her up, poof!

Ma, please, can you respect what I'm saying, okay?

Nigga, I need my vibrator.

Ma, you still on the vibrator?

- Come on! - Come on!

Stop lookin' at me like that.

Yeah!

We--we really doin' this?

Yes! Here.

What am I supposed to do with this?

If that bitch comes at me, you hit her with that.

Ma, you want me to hit the girl with a pot?

Nigga, you got my back or don't you?

I always got your back, Mom, but...come on!

Like, this is driving me insane, living here with you.

- Come on, you got me-- - Yeah, okay.

-hitting people with pots and pans?

Get your insane ass in the car.

- Come on, let's go! - Okay.

- Now, John. - I'm goin'!

That way, fool.

I thought the door was that way.

Hurry the fuck up!

Come in, shit.

Hey.

Hi.

Uh, Tom's in the shower.

Oh, I can wait outside.

No, no, um--oh, he has some wine over there

for you to drink or whatever.

Oh, sure!

Oh, okay, I guess I should pour it, then?

That's the only way you're gonna drink it.

Uh, the wine opener?

In the drawer over by the coffee pot.

You know, it's good we didn't actually go out.

Is that right?

Yeah, I wouldn't have liked you.

You're an asshole.

- Really? - It's the truth.

Well, you didn't waste any time goin' after Tom.

Okay, you want to know the truth?

I always liked Tom. I just wasn't sure he liked me.

Oh, okay! So you asked him about me.

Yeah.

Right, 'cause that makes sense, got it.

Oh, cool.

But what? You didn't like me?

No. I mean, you're cute, but...

But?

In a boyish kind of way.

- Is that right? - Yes, darling.

I'm more into men.

Okay, dear.

Who the hell could that possibly be?

Um, I'm...

I'm so sorry.

I came over just to say I'm sorry.

Now is not the best time, actually.

Oh, uh... Do you have company?

Hi.

Oh, I'm not his company.

I'm waiting for Tom.

Oh, okay, well, um, I wasn't staying.

Oh no, you should stay.

Oh, no, no, no, it's-- it's fine.

Wait, are you drinking my wine?

What? Oh, this is yours?

Yeah, I bought it for Greg.

Well, I mean, he--

Listen, Tom had it out, okay?

I--it wasn't--it wasn't up to me.

Oh, okay. Is he--is he here?

Yeah, he's back in the shower, taking forever.

- Oh. - So are you...you good?

You done?

Don't be an asshole.

I'm not being an asshole, I'm just--

-Girl, he's an asshole. - Hey, nobody's--

Yeah, I'm starting to see that more and more these days.

All right.

She came to apologize to you, Greg.

- Thank you! - Wait, what you do?

Oh, I was a little bit of an asshole to him earlier today.

Oh, is that right why you were so pissy with me?

- Don't say "pissy". - Oh, wait.

Was he that way with you too?

- Yeah. - Oh, okay!

Well, then, maybe it's not just me!

It ain't you, girl.

Are y'all--are y'all finished? Like, you sittin' down, this--

No. We're just getting started.

- Mm-hmm. - Actually.

Okay.

-Hi. - Hi.

Oh, hey, Darla.

Hi, James Bond!

How are you doing?

Wow. You ready?

- Yes. - All right.

- Okay, see you guys. - See you, now.

- All right. - Bye!

Have fun.

It was nice meeting you, Darla.

Oh, it was great meeting you too, beautiful.

Of course. Great taste in wine, by the way.

- Thank you. -Thank you!

Oh, it was my wine.

- Oh, I'm sorry. - No worries, it's totally fine.

- No, I'll buy you a new one. - You don't have to, but thanks.

I got you. All right, you guys have fun.

Bye.

They look so cute.

You can go too.

Damn.

Okay.

Oh. Hi, Miss Alice.

Don't you play crazy with me.

What do you mean? Hey, John.

Don't talk to him.

What's the matter?

I'mma tell you one time, and then I'mma fuck you up.

Miss Alice!

Why in the hell did you tear up my place like that?

What?

Don't act like you didn't hear me.

I didn't do anything to your place.

I knew she was gonna play dumb, Ma.

No, what makes y'all say that?

- Show her the damn picture. - What?

Oh my god. Who did that?

Don't act...

Are you serious? Don't play dumb, Littia.

I don't know what you're talking about.

- I really don't. - I knew you was gonna say that.

I knew you wasn't gonna be honest.

Look, where's my damn vibrator!?

Ma, we're not come in here to talk about a vibrator!

We come in to talk about why our house is messed up.

I want Larry.

You can buy another one of those, okay?

Ugh! You shouldn't even be using them.

- Where is it? -Ma--

I don't know what you're talking about!

- You sure about that? - Yes, I promise!

Yeah, okay.

Don't let me find out that you stole my shit.

I swear I didn't.

Yeah, okay.

Okay.

I'm telling you the truth.

Yeah, well, I know how to find out.

- Well, what you gonna do? - I'mma torch your ass.

Wait, what?

Yeah, you better look behind you every damn chance you get.

Miss--

'Cause I'm gonna be on that ass!

Wait, Miss Alice, listen to me.

I did not do it.

Well, you're gonna pay for some other shit that you didn't do.

I already paid my time.

Not for this crime!

John, will you please tell your mother

that I did not do it?

I ain't got nothin' to say.

You know I wouldn't do that!

No, I don't know you wouldn't do that.

- I don't know you! - Really, John?

What you mean, really? I don't know you like that!

Okay, so y'all just think

I'm just this crazy-ass lunatic, huh?

- Well, yes. - That's exactly what I thought.

Okay, okay, you know what? Y'all need to leave.

- Come on, Ma, let's go. - Yeah.

- I ain't goin' anywhere! - Ma, let's go, okay?

Y'all really need to leave before I get upset.

You don't scare me.

I am really getting upset!

Ma, let's go, come on, let's go!

- No, I'll cut a bitch. - I know you will, Ma--

Mm-hmm, and slice her into my motherfucking blender.

I understand that, Ma, let's just go.

- Y'all need to leave! - Ma, let's go, okay?

- Come on, you heard me. - Who the hell you talkin' to?

- Hey, hey! - I'm talkin' to you.

You better get out of my face.

- Aw, no, you don't-- - Ma, you done go there!

Do your thing.

- I'll tell you what. - What?

I will get on that ass.

Get yo ass out my fucking job,

please, now, bitch.

You don't know what you fucking just did.

- Oh, shit. - Oh, shit.

Oh, oh...shit!