Original subtitles

- How did you get in here? - She told me to wait for you.

With a damn knife?!

Previously on Bruh...

I have to tell you how to be a good wife?

No wonder that man wants out.

- What if I can't do it? - What do you mean?

If we get into it and I can't get my mind

off the fact that she's trans.

- I think-- - I'mma get it annulled.

I know that Bill is up to something.

This should be good.

- You look beautiful. - Thank you.

What do you mean? What the fuck?!

- Call the police. - Nah.

- Call 'em! - Okay.

I know she did this.

You think Littia did this?

Who else would have did it, Ma?

I don't think she did it.

Well, who did it? I know she did this.

-She's a nice girl. - A nice girl?

Are you kidding me?

Well, you think it was one of my men?

They get so jealous, you know, when I be on to the next.

- Ma, you're delusional, okay? - You think it was the Blinker?

She did this.

No, she didn't. I'm telling you she didn't do it.

Look at my room.

That room always been messed up. How can you tell?

Ma, look.

Shit, oh yes, she did it.

- I'm gonna kill that bitch. - I told you.

- I'm calling the police. - Hey, hey,

- don't call the police yet. - Why not?

I need to see if they stole my supply.

Ma, you a drug dealer?

-Oh shit! - What?

-All my shit gone. - All what stuff gone?

My sex toys.

- Are you serious? - My Big Larry vibrator.

Ma, ain't nobody care about your vibrator.

- Look at our house! - I'm gonna kill that bitch.

- I'm calling the police. - My shit.

You're gonna kill her now 'cause she--okay.

You wait till the damn police get here.

Yes, yes.

Somebody broke into our house, okay?

- We need police down here. - And send a fine man.

- Yeah, don't worry about her. - 'Cause I don't...

Hey, I don't let no women come in here.

Ma, shhh. She on medication. Yes, yes, that's the address.

Hurry, y'all! Get my shit, before somebody use them.

Shut up. Thank you so much.

No, she's not the one that broke in, no. Thank you, bye.

- They on their way? - Yes, okay?

I can't believe this!

So are you gonna take me over to her job?

- No. - You're gonna take me there,

and I'm gonna tear everything up in there too.

Yeah, okay, Ma, whatever.

You wait until the damn police get here. Shit.

What you doing?

I'm looking for my tracker app.

- What tracker app? - My vibrator's on an app.

What?! Ma, why, why... Okay, a what?

Hey, you better be glad I got it. That way I know where it is.

So you telling me they got apps, tracker apps,

for vibrators?

Yeah, tell you how long you use them and everything.

- How long the battery last. - Why--

Shut up, boy. Track Big Dick Larry.

Tracking Big Dick Larry.

- Please hold. - See that?

- Work like a damn charm. - Ma, can you just go? Okay?

You talking about a tracker app. Can you just go in your room?

I gotta fix this or something. This is my apartment!

Damn, she painted "bitch" on the wall.

Ma, I see it. It's very clear that she painted that.

- I can see it in red. - Yeah boy, I know it hurt.

- Ma-- - 'Cause she was talking

- about you. - Go and do your tracker app.

- About your bitch ass. - Ma, go find Big Larry or

whoever that is. Go focus on that in there, please.

Okay, okay, but this some sad shit. Some sad shit.

Ma, look at my place! I don't got-- Do you wanna see--

- Ma, just go. - Your place?

- This ain't your God damn-- - This is my place.

You got your hands on me?

Ma, can you go in the room please? Shoot!

I'll beat your ass.

You need to help me find that shit.

'Cause it help me relax, motherfucker.

♪ Navigating through this dating life ♪

♪ Tryin' to find me a shawty and make her mine ♪

♪ Now I'll find one in no time ♪

♪ With the help of my homies ♪

♪ I'm going up with my bruhs ♪

♪ Cause we're going up, we're going up ♪

♪ Me and my bruhs

♪ Going up, going up ♪

♪ Going up, we're going up with the bruhs ♪

♪ Ooh, whoa

♪ Going up and going up with the bruhs ♪

Oh no, I got that.

- Sorry. - No, no, do you.

You know, that is beautiful.

- What is? - The building.

- You saw that that quick? - I don't miss anything, honey.

So you, you read blueprints?

Yeah, my dad is a builder.

- Okay, so, so you get it then? - I do.

And if I may make a slight suggestion?

Sit down, sit down.

I think that if you make the living room

a little smaller and the kitchen larger, it'll be a lot nicer.

- You think so? - Yeah. This is for a family?

It's a spec house for a builder.

Oh, yeah. Well for sure, the buyers, especially the wives,

love big kitchens.

I mean, that's kind of select.

Not really. I mean, the kitchen is the congregation area

everything happens in there.

You gotta think of it as, like, an entertainment space.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah, I see what you're saying.

You should think about it.

You know what? I will before I present it to him.

Great.

Thank you for you help.

My help? You're the architect.

And you're the housekeeper.

Uh, business owner, correction.

- That too. - Yeah.

Well, I'll let you get back to work.

Oh, no, no, I'm-- I'm done now.

Okay, well, I guess I can head out.

You gotta leave so soon?

Yeah, I have a few more appointments.

I mean, don't you have a lunch break?

It's not quite that time yet.

Well, I'd love to take you to lunch.

And why would you want to do that?

I mean, this, this was a great idea.

I'd love to see how many more of these you have.

Lame, that was lame.

- What? - That was lame.

What?

Look, I know what you're trying to do, not gonna work.

- You think that low of me? - I don't think anything of you.

Oh.

- Oh, yeah? - Yeah. Look, I gotta go.

Okay. Well, you know, I'mma-- I'mma go ahead and call you

so you can come clean my place.

Yeah, just, uh, shoot me a text with your inch--

square footage, and I'll send you a quote.

- You got it. - All right.

Okay. I know...

I know this is gonna sound a little weird,

but I really do feel like I know you.

Like I've had to run into you somewhere.

Second lame attempt.

- No. - That's number two.

- No, no, I'm being serious. - You don't get--

I'm serious right now.

Look, you're a handsome man and all, but I'm here for work.

Okay. Well, I get that. I'm married, so...it's cool.

- Oh, you're married? - Yeah.

- Me too. - Yeah?

- Yeah. - Okay, well, so then...good.

So then what?

You know married men cheat, right?

- So do married women. - Have you ever?

Damn, you just gonna throw that curveball just like that?

Yup.

Honestly I can say that I've never cheated on my wife.

Wow, she's a lucky woman.

Thank you. Have you?

- I'm asking the questions here. - I'mma take that as a soft yes.

No, it's not a yes.

I think it's just a conversation for another day

as we're getting to know each other.

Oh, you, you don't think nothing of me and now

all of a sudden you wanna get to know me? That's funny. Okay.

'Cause you're going to call me to clean your place.

Oh yeah, I'm definitely gonna call you.

Yeah.

You ain't gotta worry about that.

Okay.

I'm taking this.

- Take care. -You too.

Sheesh.

Tom, you been holding out, bruh.

God damn, where's that card?

Yeah, so it's just been a lot of stuff going on over at

your place, man. It's been--

it's been pretty hectic over there, you know?

Yeah, I feel it a little bit.

Yeah, it's just a lot. I don't know if I wanna deal

- with all that. - Yeah, I mean, it's cool

but I get it.

I understand where you're coming from.

You might wanna step out on your own too, right?

Might be a good idea. I'm thinking the same thing.

But I mean, just so you know, though,

you don't have to move out if you don't want to.

I mean, you don't mind me staying there?

No, no. I mean, the extra rent's helping me, right?

Sending a little extra money to my mom. It's all good.

I mean, if you don't mind, then I can just, I can just say.

If you don't mind. If it's cool with you.

You seem like you're cool with it.

Yeah, yeah, if you want, that's cool.

- Cool, I'll stay, cool. - Hi!

- Hey. - You're back.

How's your mother?

She's actually doing a lot better, thanks.

-Good. - Thanks for asking.

Hey, have you, have you-- you met my college buddy?

- No, I haven't. Hi. I'm Dina. - Greg.

You work here?

Yeah.

Greg's actually an attending physician.

- Nice. - Yeah.

Well, uh, I'm gonna go see a patient.

But, uh, you guys can chat a little bit.

- Oh really? - Sure. Alright, See you later.

Okay, talk to you later.

- Bye, Greg. - I'll see you, man.

- What? - Nothing, man.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm cool, yeah.

Alright, see ya.

- What are you eating? - A salad.

It looks good.

- Yeah, you want some? - No, no, I have my own.

Okay.

So, tell me about yourself.

- Why? - What do you mean?

- What did he do? - What? Who?

Tom.

I have no idea what you're talking about.

Right, okay. Ha, ha, I get it, like, he put you up to this.

Like, what is it?

Okay, I'm--I'm sorry.

He sent you over here to meet me, right?

No, no. It wasn't anything like that.

- So what is this? - Okay.

What are we doing?

Okay, if you want to know the truth,

- I asked him if I could meet you. - Really?

And he said come to lunch, but you ate in here,

so I kind of had to improvise.

You know that's not smooth, right?

- No, no, it's not. - Like, at all.

- Okay, I'm sorry. - It's fine. It's cool,

- I get it. - Can we start again?

Yeah, okay. I'm Greg. Nice to meet you!

- And I'm Dina. - Yes.

- Is this too forward? - Nope, nope, this is just fine.

- Perfectly fine. - Good, good.

I mean, in this town you have to put yourself out there.

Is that so?

Yeah, I mean between the men who are gay,

married, no ambition, or in jail, you don't really have

- many choices. - Oh.

I'm sorry, I'm not trying to get married,

I'm just saying hello. I wanted to get to know you.

I get it, I get it. It's cool.

But if you're not attracted to me it's okay. I can just...

- I don't mind. - Like damn,

that was a little fast, don't you think?

What do you mean?

I mean, like, I've known you for 13 seconds

and you're already talking about attraction, right?

Let's relax a little bit.

Greg, Greg, you and I both know

when we meet someone if they are attractive or not.

- When I met you, I knew you were. - Thank you.

Oh, so I'm not out of line?

No, and you're very attractive yourself.

Thank you.

But I just got out of a divorce.

Oh, I know, he told me.

What else did he tell you?

That you are a great guy, and that I should say hi.

- That's it. - Uh-huh, okay, sure.

- So, look, this is just lunch. - Just lunch for me.

Having lunch and I guess you already ate or whatever.

Yeah. And if we like each other,

- I may let you take me out. - Wow!

Well, I'm glad that you may be feeling so generous.

Yes, I may.

Thank you. Cool.

So you, uh... you want some of my dessert?

You have dessert?

- Yeah. Come on. - What you, what you got?

- You don't wanna... - I'll come see, I guess.

Man, what taking the police so long?

You better not tell them that she did it.

- Why not? - Hell, we don't know that.

Ma, I'm telling you the girl did it, okay?

No, she didn't.

Ma, I'm telling them the truth, okay?

If you tell them that and I kill the bitch,

then it's all gonna come back on me.

- Are you serious? - Yeah, and don't be

cleaning that shit up. Let the police see it.

It's called evidence, bitch.

Listen to me, the only way you get rid of crazy

- is with crazier. - Ma, you are crazy.

What kind of motherfucker steals

- a woman's sex toys? - Ma, enough!

And plus, we don't know whether or not it was Littia

- or not. Shit. - Ma, did you see my room?

I know.

And would one of your men write this on the wall?

- May have. Shit. - Okay, you just,

you just delusional.

They probably heard me talking about you.

Talking about... What are you talking about?

I call you a bitch ass all the time.

Why would you call-- Alright, Ma.

Well, you know, you know when I be fucking my men,

and you be, you be shouting and shit?

Yeah, that's when they hear.

And you be next door saying, "Stop, stop."

And you don't see why, you don't get why

I would be next door shouting to my mom

to "stop, stop" while she's making noise with men?

That doesn't register to you? You don't get it, huh?

I'm the bitch 'cause I don't know.

Yeah, you the bitch 'cause you don't get it.

You got a problem.

If you were getting some, your ass wouldn't be doing that.

I wouldn't be doing it next door to my mom.

- Nigga, you live in my house. - This is my house, Ma.

You don't pay no damn bills.

I do pay bills! Why you keep saying that?

- You don't pay no bills. -I do.

- No you don't. - I do!

-I ain't seen shit. - You... 'Cause you ain't see...

See, you a bitch. See that, look at that.

Bitch ass.

Don't, I just told your ass don't pick the shit up.

Well Ma, it's in my house, it looks terrible!

- Where's the police, man? - You know what?

- It might have been Lil Black. - Who the...

Why would you be dating a man named Lil Black?

He little and he black, but his dick ain't little.

Everything's about that.

Who is it?

-Police. - Shit, it's a woman.

- Hey. - Hey. I know her, Ma.

- Ms. Alice - Hi.

Hi.

I thought they were gonna send a man.

Oh, no, you get me and my partner.

- Is he a man? - Yeah, he's a man.

- Where he at? - He's downstairs in the car.

Okay, well, I'll go talk to him, then.

- Oh, okay. - Look at your apartment.

Do you want to tell me what happened first?

- No, no, let him tell you. - Oh, okay.

- I'll be right back. - Alright.

- He is a white man, now. - They got big dicks too.

- Okay. What? - Um... Do you want to tell me

what happened? I heard there's a vibrator missing?

I'm not sure, so...

Okay. Uh, well, was anything stolen?

No, just my place tore the hell up.

That's what's been happening here.

Okay, alright, well, I'll make the report.

- Thank you, I appreciate it. - Yeah, no problem.

Hey look, real quick before you go,

I just wanted to apologize about the other day.

- What do you mean? - The other day I was being mean

and, uh, you know... And I apologize for school too.

But, um, I just, you know-- I don't get it.

I'm confused, I don't understand. So, I'm sorry.

You don't get what?

Um, you know, the flip.

I don't get the whole trans thing.

You don't have to get it, but you better get used to it.

Respect. I just wanted to apologize.

- I'm sorry. - Yeah, it's fine.

And you know, opening up your mind

- wouldn't be such a bad idea. - I'm sorry?

I said opening up your mind wouldn't be such a bad idea.

Um.

That's a lot of damn opening up.

I don't know if I'm ready for that open. That's open.

Oh, okay, well fuck you if you don't.

Chill out, I didn't mean it like that.

I didn't mean it like that. Like, I'm just saying, like...

Okay look, I'm just here to do my job. I can leave.

Okay, respect. I wasn't trying to offend you.

- Well, you are. - I was trying to apologize.

And you John, out of all people,

should know what it's like to be targeted for who you are.

- Me of all people? - Can you imagine, for a moment,

if you walked into a white person's home

to do your job and they made you feel unwelcome?

Your mind would explode. But you know what?

You don't get it when it comes to me

'cause your empathy doesn't extend that far.

So I'm gonna send my white partner up here

to deal with you. Bye bye.

The fuck?

- What the hell was that? - What was what?

Don't, man.

Oh, she just wanted to meet you.

Don't tell me you're on this Darla thing too, bro.

Darla? What--what are you talking about?

You're better than John, like, don't act like John. Come on.

Wait, wait, wait. Slow down.

What are you talking about right now?

You don't want me dating trans women.

Are you serious? I never said that.

Then why are you trying to set me up with Dina?

I wasn't trying to set you up, bro.

She asked if she could meet you,

and she didn't want to be too forward

so I told her to come over and say hi. What are...

- Was that a problem? - Way too forward, man.

Way too forward.

Like, I don't like aggressive women.

Okay, I'm sorry.

How was I supposed to know that, though?

How do you not know that of all people, bro?

Greg, because your wife was super aggressive,

- so I'm thinking... - My ex-wife, ex-wife.

That's exactly what I'm talking about,

I'm done with women like that. Alright?

Okay, I'm sorry.

Okay, so I won't be going out with Dina,

as lovely as she is.

Fine, no, that, that's cool.

But just so you know,

I wasn't trying to get you off Darla.

That's exactly what it looks, man.

Well, that's not what's happening. I'm being serious.

- Okay? - Okay,

well how about you and John just let me do me

and y'all do whatever you got going on in your life.

- But I'm good. - Bruh--

- I'm straight. - That wasn't what I was doing.

If you're getting all bent out of shape about this

and it's really that serious, then maybe you should

have that conversation with Darla

that we talked about and tell her how you really feel.

- I plan to. - Go ahead.

- Actually, I have. - Oh, really?

So, if you would just let me do me and worry about yourself,

I'm good. You don't need to set me up anymore.

- I'm straight, I'm fine. Alright? - Well, you know what?

After this little display, introducing you

to a good-looking woman, I'll never do again.

- I don't need you to do that. - That's what I'm saying!

- I won't do that again! - Thank you, I appreciate it.

But just for the record,

that's not what I was trying to do.

I ain't trying to get you off Darla,

I'm trying to introduce you to someone 'cause why not?

You just said you weren't...

You said that she wanted to meet me.

But now you're saying you introduced...

- Oh, okay. - We're talking in circles, bro.

Yeah, but can you just not do that?

Like, I'm asking, please, can you not?

I just said I won't do that.

I would appreciate it if you didn't. Thank you.

I'm good, okay? So we're good.

Appreciate it. Alright.

What the hell is wrong with this guy?

- Hi, sorry. - What are you sorry about?

I forgot my key fob to get in.

Oh, okay.

Can I go look for it?

Yeah, I got you, I'll help you.

Thanks, I think it's in the bedroom.

- Okay, well, let's go. -Wait...

What's up?

I don't think we should go in there.

Well, I mean, if the key is in there,

that's where we gotta go.

Yeah, I don't think I should go in there with you.

What?

Oh, okay. Oh, you don't trust me.

You think I'm gonna try something?

Okay, how about this? You stay here, I'll go do that.

You can be safe right here.

It's--it's actually not that at all.

It's not you I don't trust, it's me.

Oh, okay.

I've never done this before.

Done what?

I'm really unhappy in my marriage.

I'm sorry to hear that.

And you? You are the finest man I've ever seen.

Thank you. Thank you for that.

And you're married.

- Yeah, I am, I am. - And I'm married too, so...

Yes, you are.

Yeah, um, it could be safe.

What could be safe?

We don't have to talk about it.

- Okay, I don't really follow. - I...

I wanna fuck you.