Original subtitles

and I am about to cowgirl you.

Previously on Bruh...

Nigga, you ain't about to get no pass.

Oh, you must have a plan,

'cause this place is worth a good four hundred.

And I can use all of that.

Regina threatened to divorce me last night

and take me for all of my shit.

If you don't want her to take half of your shit,

you need to get the marriage annulled.

Are you sure John's alright?

That bitch, you know what, is a serial killer.

Our baby is gonna be so stinking cute.

Our who?

- Hey. -Hey, who's this?

It's John!

Yeah, I'm just kidding. I know it's you, John.

Where you at?

Uh, I was actually gonna tell you,

I just got back last night, man.

Thank god.

Yeah, my mom is doing okay, thank you for asking.

Oh, I'm so sorry, that's my fault.

That's my bad.

So, what the hell's going on?

Hey bro, hey listen, I need a morning after pill.

You do know that's not for you, right?

Come on man, don't play with me right now, okay?

Okay. Do you want to tell me what's going on?

I just need you to get me a morning after pill.

Okay, yeah.

Can I come by the hospital and pick it up?

Yeah, yeah, I'm heading in there right now.

-Okay, cool. - Okay, do you...

you gonna tell me what happened?

Okay, I'll let you know when I get there.

- Alright, cool. -If I get there.

What are you talking about?

Listen, just know I love the bruhs man,

you know what I'm saying? All we've been through,

just know, just know I love y'all, okay?

Okay, John, I don't have time for this, alright?

Alright.

Alright, I gotta get to the hospital.

- I'll see you later. - Okay, bye.

Shit. I gotta get out of here.

Did you say something?

No, I didn't say nothing.

Okay, I know I've been in there for a long time.

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, y'all got that good ass hot project water.

Yeah. You like 'em.

Yeah, I'm like it in really, really clean.

That's really good, you gotta get clean.

Yeah, so do you want to come join me?

No, I got, I actually gotta get to the store.

Oh, well I can get dressed and take you.

Oh, no, no, no. Go ahead,

take your long shower, enjoy.

Just lock up when you leave.

Are you sure?

- Yes, I'm sure. - You trust me like that?

-I do. - Oh my god.

I knew I made the right choice.

You gonna make a good ass baby daddy.

Oh, well that's great to know.

What are we gonna name the baby?

I don't know.

I like Chuckie.

Or, or, no, no, that's a lot. Freddy.

Or you know what? No.

We should go a little bit more regular, like Jason.

You like that?

No, fuck it, let's go all out, baby, Candyman.

- Yeah! - What?

-Right? - Right.

- Really? -That sound good to me.

- You really like it? - I do, it's just,

it's you know, it's real, uh, uh, different.

And just, you know, he'll be different, for sure.

- Yeah, he will. - Or she.

♪ Navigating through this dating life ♪

♪ Tryin' to find me a shorty and make her mine ♪

♪ Now I'll find one in no time ♪

♪ With the help of my homies ♪

♪ I'm goin' up with my bruhs ♪

♪ Cause we're goin' up, we're goin' up ♪

♪ Me and my bruhs

♪ Goin' up, goin up

♪ We're goin' up, we're goin' up with the bruhs ♪

♪ Ooh, whoa

♪ Goin' up and goin' up with the bruhs ♪

Well, go ahead, get to your shower and everything,

- I'm gonna go. - Okay.

Alright.

Are you sure you don't want to join me?

I am sure. Ooh girl, you look good, though.

It look fine, that little shimmy.

- See you later. - Have a good shower.

- Hey. - Hey. Shh.

What?

You scared me, first of all.

- I gotta get out of here. - Why?

Why did you let her in here last night?

I don't know what you talking about.

- Ma, you let her in my room. - Who?

What you mean some, "Who"? Littia!

No, I didn't.

- Why you lying? - I didn't, I went to work.

Damn. So she really did break in here?

That bitch better not have stole my sex toys.

Ma, ain't nobody talking about no damn sex toys,

she breaking in, we got a murderer in our house,

and you talking about some sex toys.

Who is that?

That's her. In there taking a shower,

'cause you let her in.

How the hell she running up my damn water bill?

- Ma, you let her-- - She don't live here!

You the one let her in.

No, I didn't. I did not, but I'm about to go in there

and grab her ass out of there, though.

Okay, well you need to hold on. Wwait 'til I leave,

and you can go do whatever you want to do. Okay?

Why you looking like that?

Your ass supposed to be at the sandwich shop.

That's where I'm on my way to.

What you were doing?

What you mean what I was, I'm about to go.

- Y'all was fucking? - What? No. No we wasn't.

Yeah, you were. I smell young ass.

- Yeah, young ass. - Alright Ma, whatever.

It smell different than old ass.

You would know.

I can't do this, I'm about to go.

Hey, don't leave me in here with that crazy bitch.

You're the one let her in here.

- No, I didn't. - Yes, you did.

- I did not. - Yeah, okay Ma,

- I'm going to the shop. - Okay, fine.

Hey, you in there running up my damn water bill!

- Hey, what's up, boy? - What's going on? Hey.

- How you been, man? - Chilling man,

- how are you? - Good, good to see you.

Good to see you, man. How's your momma?

Don't start that now, bro.

No seriously, I should've asked earlier,

- that was my fault. - It's cool, we're good.

-She good? - Yeah, but she's...

She's actually doing a lot better man,

- I appreciate it. - No problem, that's good.

- It's good to see you, man! - You too, man,

missed you, man, it's been a minute.

- Yeah. - But uh, yeah, her,

while I've been gone,

young Greg's been holding my place down.

Yeah, he been holding it down and your neighbors.

Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

What you mean?

No, I mean I get back and he's like,

"Yo, what do you know about Darla?"

He's asking me about her, so I know he's been, you know.

- Yeah. -Yeah.

Yeah. That's interesting.

I was trying to call him about that.

What, that specifically?

Yeah, that specifically. Darla, yeah.

Yeah, I went to school with Darla.

- You did? - Yeah.

Darla used to be Darren when I was in school.

- Right. - Wait, wait, wait, wait, what?

Yes. So Darla used to be Darren.

Wow. Um... Well. Okay.

I'm sorry. Just "okay"?

Yeah. Yeah man. Leave it alone.

- Hmm? - Yeah.

Okay, wait, did you hear what I said?

Maybe you don't... you know Darren's a guy name, right?

Okay, but she is a woman now,

and he's super into her. He's excited about her,

so what do you want to do?

Is this all... maybe I'm...

Maybe y'all not telling me something that I should know.

What do you mean?

You're cool with him dating a trans...woman?

If that's what he wants to do, John, yeah.

- Is he, is he... what? - Is he what? Exactly.

What you mean exactly? What are you talking like--

If he's cool with it, then exactly what you're saying.

If the man is cool with it, he's cool with it.

So he, so is he cool with it?

Clearly he's cool with it, he's the one doing it, right?

Look, I mean hey, Greg has always been kind of like, free.

What kind of free? Like "Let freedom ring," free?

"Give us free?" Like what kind of freedom

are you speaking to- Like god, just free

- John, you know? - I don't know!

I'm asking, that's why I'm asking.

- Free, how? - I mean just free, damn!

You know, he's just kind of not traditional.

So wait, wait, wait, wait,

so he been with his wife since college, right?

So they got married, they had a family,

da da da da da.

Oh!

He's on the down low, that's what you saying.

No, he's not down low, he's not down low.

- He not down low? - No.

- He ain't up high? - I'm confused.

So wait, wait, wait, wait,

okay, take it back,

um, he's not on the down low, but he free?

He's free, you know?

Free like the slaves were after Civil War?

John, he's just free, okay?

Can you stop asking the same question about the guy?

Look, if he wants to tell you, then he will. Simple.

- But you not gonna tell me? - I'll let him tell you.

Wait, but why would he tell you and not me?

John, I don't know, I'm not in that man's head.

So does Mike and Bill know?

- I think they do, yeah. - Hm, what do they know?

You see, John, I'm not falling for that.

You was kinda slick, though, you kinda good. Yeah.

You smart, you smart, okay cool.

Okay cool, so Mike and Bill knows what about him?

That's, hey, we're done with that.

I didn't get in that way? Okay.

Do you want to talk about the reason you want

- a morning after pill, though? - Yeah, can you,

- can you actually do that? - Yeah I can go get one for you.

Okay.

Okay, do you want to tell me what happened?

Yeah, I can tell you what happened. Not right now.

Oh okay, you want to talk about.

I really don't want to talk about it.

Well listen, just so you know,

condoms are usually the preferred method,

because it doesn't create the hormonal changes--

Tom, I don't need a sex education lesson.

- Are you sure? - I am sure.

Because you probably need to get tested, actually.

- Tom, just give me the pill. - I'm just saying.

- I don't... - Okay, I'll get you the pill.

I didn't come for a...

I'll get you the pill, but listen.

- Thank you. - Be safe in these streets,

it's treacherous out there.

- Okay, thank you. - I see it all.

Okay, I appreciate it. You be safe in these streets, too.

- I'll be right back. - You need to tell Greg

- to be safe in these streets. - Okay, I'll be right back.

This bitch still in here.

Hey! Who turned off the water?

I turned that shit off!

Why?

Girl, you know how high my damn water bill gonna be?

I'm sorry, Ms. Alice.

What the hell you think this is?

Well, I thought it was like the projects,

where you don't have to pay for water.

This is my home, this is not the projects.

- I'm sorry. - Get your ass out of here.

Okay.

I won't leave you in my house.

Ms. Alice, you know I don't steal.

No, but you'll cut a bitch.

- You right about that. - Yeah, you too, that's right.

Thank you so much for letting me stay the night.

Well, don't let him know I let you.

- He mad as hell. - Why he mad?

Little dick men always mad about something.

Um, Ms. Alice,

I don't really know how to say this,

and I feel really weird talking to you about it,

but that ain't true.

- What? - He ain't got no little dick.

What, it grew?

Child, the way he put it on me last night!

- My son know how to fuck? - Yeah, it was good.

Oh shit, that's really good. I'm so proud of him.

Yeah, it was so good.

You know, he must have learned in prison,

that's where he learned it.

Ms. Alice, wasn't he locked up with guys?

Well what better way to learn than a guy teaching you?

No, I don't think that's it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, well whatever it is,

- I'm really proud of him. - Yeah, yeah you should be.

Yeah. So you really like him, huh?

Yeah, I do.

Okay, alright, well I'm happy.

Yeah, but I don't really think he's feeling me like that.

- Yes, he does. - Nah. I'm telling you, he not.

Yeah, yeah, see, see you know John,

he don't know what he want. He like most men.

You have to make him want you.

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, so just take your time with him.

- Okay. I will. -Okay.

What you doing?

Oh, uh, nothing.

Bitch, I got to go back to work,

you got to get out of here!

Oh, okay, my bad.

Yeah, I can't be here watching you

and at work trying to catch a man.

- Okay. - Yeah.

And is that my damn perfume you're wearing?

Yes, it smells so good.

Bitch, don't be putting on my shit.

- I'm sorry. - That's called Dick Grabber.

-What? - Yeah, that keep 'em coming.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, so don't be putting on my shit, it's expensive.

Yes, ma'am.

I had to buy that at the Five and Hoe store.

- I cannot, okay, my bad. - Yeah, it gonna be your ass

if you go in there and touch it again.

- Yes ma'am. -Hurry up.

Oh, okay.

Hey, what you doing?

Hey, you ain't got no time to be on no damn phone!

I'm hurrying, Ms. Alice.

Well hurry up, Jesus.

Okay, yes ma'am. Hey.

- Hey. -What you doing?

Uh yeah, I'm on my way to work,

you think you can come by to meet me there?

Yeah, you want me to stop by your job?

- Yeah, please. -You miss me.

- I sure do. - Mm-hmm.

- I knew I put it on your ass. -You did do that.

Our baby's gonna be so damn cute.

Yup, can't wait. So you coming?

Yeah, I'll stop by.

- Okay. - Okay.

You know I gotta hurry up, 'cause your momma is rushing me.

Yup, that sounds like her.

Okay, I'll see you soon.

Hey, did she let you in?

Yeah, I told you that. I stayed all night.

- Yeah. -You a damn snitch!

I'm hurrying Ms. Alice, I'm sorry.

These walls are too damn thin.

Thin enough for me to push your ass

through one of them.

Oh, okay. Look, I gotta go.

- Okay. -Yeah, I'll see you.

- Alright, bye. - Bye.

Hey.

Hey, Mr. Dr. Greg Hunter, how are you?

I'm good, man. You been blowing my phone up,

what's going on?

You know what? I was, and I had needed something,

but I don't need it anymore. So nothing.

Okay, you sure?

It seemed like it was important.

Yeah, no. I'm good. You good?

- I'm good. - I'm good.

- I'm good if you good. - What?

- So you straight? - Yeah, I'm straight.

Like you good and you straight?

What does that mean?

Like do you bend or are you straight?

John, what are you saying?

Okay, if you straight, you straight.

- I'm straight. - Cool!

That's all I need to know. How was your day?

It was good.

- It was good? - Yeah.

- Had a good time? - Yeah, we had a real good time.

Okay. Did y'all go all the way?

That's not your business, but no.

You would tell me, you didn't go all the way?

No man, we just decided to be friends.

Okay, wasn't like no thumb wrestling match

- or nothing like that? - No.

Okay, cool, cool. Y'all, so y'all friends?

- Yeah. Just friends. - Cool.

Cool, so take your time, huh? You're gonna take your time.

- Yeah, I got it man. - Yeah.

I just want you to take your time, man.

Good that you all be friends, so, you know,

'cause you just got out of a relationship, you know.

You want to take your time, man,

you in Atlanta, bro. You know, some baddies in here,

you want to play the field, you know what I'm saying?

Enjoy your life.

- I got it, man. - Yeah, don't do...

- don't be doing that. - What are you talking about?

Don't worry about it.

Is there something you want to ask me?

Is there something you're trying to say?

- What are you saying? - What?

'Cause you're going back and forth about me and--and Darla.

I ain't back and forth, are you back and forth?

I don't know what you're asking.

Are you back or forth?

What are-- is there something you want to ask me bro?

What are you talking about? What are you saying?

I don't... I don't know what you're saying.

I am saying see other women, that's all I'm saying.

You said y'all friends, see other women.

It's very important that you see other women.

- Yeah, I plan to. - Cool.

Alright, cool.

So what you doing tonight? You want to hang out?

Oh, no me and Darla are actually having dinner tonight.

- Huh? -Yeah.

You just said y'all was friends?

Is there something you want to say?

That ain't playing the field, you just said we friends.

John, if you have something to say, just say it.

Alright...

Darla used to be called...

Darren.

- I know. - Huh?

-Yeah. - Did you hear what I said?

- I heard you. - Darla--

I know, I heard you.

- The flip... - I know. Yes.

- You know that? -I know that.

- And you cool with it? -Yes.

And you don't, you said, and you don't care?

No, I don't care.

Oh. My bad. Cool.

Yeah, is there anything else you want to ask me?

No. I just... yeah. No.

- Alright, man. - News to me.

Yeah, well people are people, man.

You need to grow up,

I don't know why you're acting like that,

like it's not a big deal.

My bad. I... people are people,

I just wanted you to know what, what people did,

and where they came from, and where, you know,

- the origin of them. - And I'm cool with it, are you?

Yeah, I'm good with it.

I just didn't want her fooling you.

- I didn't want you to, you know-- - Fooling me?

Yeah I didn't want her to trick you and you didn't know.

She's not that kind of person, man,

she's not fooling anybody.

Oh, so she told you when y'all first met?

No, but it's not, it's not like that.

So she didn't tell you when y'all first met?

No, but look, it's like when you first meet someone,

you don't know if you like them yet,

so you don't share all the information with them,

but you wait until you're more comfortable with them

and you open up a little bit more, then you start

to share a little bit more information, right?

I guess you're right. I... I...

What? Why, why are you here?

Tom told me you had somewhere to be, what are you doing?

I'm waiting for Tom. Why you getting agitated?

I was just trying to check on you, make sure you was good.

- But you said you know. - I'm good. Why are you here?

What are you, what do you need?

I'm wait, he coming to look, he giving me something.

- You're good? - I'm good.

- So we're good? We're straight? - We're good.

I just wanted to make sure you was okay.

I'm perfect, man. I'll talk to you later, alright?

- Okay. - You good?

- Watch them bumps in the road. - Alright, have a good one, bro.

Alright, you too.

Look Regina, we need to get this marriage annulled.

Nah, that ain't gonna work.

Damn, I've done that before. Shit.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Uh, hello. - How are you?

- Um, I'm good. - You are handsome.

Thank you.

Um, you know, I'm sorry, who are you?

Oh, I'm sorry, I'm Hilda.

-Hilda? - Yeah.

Uh, I don't, I don't know a Hilda,

and how did you get in here?

Oh, I got a key,

and that's what happens when you marry my daughter

and I don't get to meet you.

- Oh. You're Regina's mom? - Yes.

Well, it's nice to meet you.

Well, I saw you at her first wedding,

but we didn't get to meet.

Uh, um, uh, I'm sorry about that.

- That's okay. - No, it's not.

Yeah, you right, it's not, but oh well.

You're not gonna stand up and greet a woman?

Yeah, sorry about that. Where are my manners?

Get my bags.

- I'm sorry, bags? - Yeah. They right out there.

Right there. Thank you.

- They heavy, huh? - Yup.

You don't uh, you don't travel light, do you?

Not when I'm moving.

- Moving? -Yeah.

- Moving where? - In with you.

- Oh, okay. - Where's the spare bedroom?

It's over there, but it's, it's real small.

Oh, that's okay.

Okay. Um, how long are you gonna...

how long you plan on being here?

No, baby, I'm moving in.

Regina said when she got married,

I could move in and live with her husband.

So you are her husband, and I'm moving in.

- Hey! - Hey...