Original subtitles

- What is this? - My share of the money.

- Mike, that boat-- - Please take it.

Narrator: Previously on "Bruh"...

I done gave all my shit up for this dude.

I wish I wouldn't have taken the fall,

but I thought I was doing the right thing.

Tom: We got drunk, we made out,

and honestly, she's been at me ever since.

- You and I are done. - What?

You, you, or you would have never did that shit for me, man.

You screw any woman you want, and you think that women

don't have that option?

I have done nothing to that woman.

I made the call. I did what I had to do, bro.

Get the fuck out and leave right now, man!

Fuck!

Singer: ♪ I've gone to the edge ♪

♪ And back again 100 times ♪

♪ Still can't describe ♪

♪ Can't say no, no ♪

Mike: Hey.

Tom: Hey.

- I said later. - Yeah, I know.

Then what you doing here?

I got suspended.

The fucking girl?

Yes.

I told you to go first.

I know, man. I was gonna go Monday--

Mike: And she beat you to it?

Yeah.

W-what did I do, bro?

What is she saying?

That I sexually harassed her,

the hostile work environment, a bunch of nonsense.

Damn.

Well, can you help me?

Just give me the name and number of your chief,

and I'll call her.

- Thanks, man. I will. - Sure.

- Damn. - What?

This place. Heh.

Shit looks fire, right?

Tom: Yo. Mike: Heh.

When did you have the time to, um--

Mike: Pam. Pam.

What, you let her decorate?

Yep.

It was before I called her a thot.

You called her a what?

Yo, bro. I saw her hugged up and booed up

with some ballplayer at the bar.

Oh. OK.

That's all you got to say is "Oh. OK"?

Bro, you're not together.

Why does everybody keep saying that, man?

Because you the one that said that.

Well, she was just--

she was my...my--

Your what?

Never mind.

Tell me. Tell me.

No. Nothing. Where's Bill?

Tell me what you were gonna say.

She was just a snack whenever I needed it.

Man, you guys got some women drama.

You with Pamela, Bill chasing after Regina.

You with the batshit crazy nurse.

Yeah, yeah. I know, I know, but guess what.

I'm not having anymore sex. I'm done.

That's a little bit extreme, don't you think?

Well, hey. If it keeps the crazies away--

Bruh, you'll last about 6 days.

Uh-uh. No. I'm gonna go to church.

I'm gonna give my body and my soul to the Lord.

Mike: All right, Kanye. That's not helping me.

How you feeling?

I'm just mad, man.

It'll be all right.

Yeah. Well, it better be.

Singer: ♪ Navigating through this dating life ♪

♪ Trying to find me a shawty and make her mine ♪

♪ Now I'll find one in no time with the help of my homies ♪

♪ I'm going up with my bruhs ♪

♪ Yeah, going up and going up with my bruhs ♪

♪ Going up and going up with my bruhs ♪

♪ Going up, going up with my bruhs ♪

♪ Ooh, going up and ♪

♪ Going up with the bruhs ♪

Singer: ♪ I'mma tell you something I know ♪

♪ Out here killin' for survival ♪

♪ I treat my people like they're vital ♪

♪ I got these on the tightrope ♪

♪ So I got to do it my way ♪

I'll call your chief,

let her know that I'm representing you.

Mike got you, baby.

Just, um, be prepared. She knows.

About?

All of us in college.

What about all of us in college?

Bro, she's talking to me about John

like she knows him personally.

You told her that?

Of course I didn't tell her.

- It was Valerie. - This fucking bitch.

I told you she's a stalker, dude.

How the hell'd she find out?

I have no idea, but somehow, she knows.

- See what I'm dealing with? - Yeah.

All right. I'll be ready.

You know something else she said that I didn't like?

Nope, but I'm sure you're about to tell me.

She said that I was handsome and I think

all these women are falling at my feet.

- Really? - What?

You sure she didn't get us confused?

- Mike. - Seriously,

sounds like she was flirting.

- No. Heh. - You sure?

Y--no. She was not flirting.

Why was she commenting about your looks?

I have no idea.

Bruh...

- Hmm? - Imagine if a man was

saying this to a woman.

What would we think?

- Ooh. - Mm-hmm.

- Damn. - Right?

You think?

If she wasn't, I'm definitely gonna insinuate.

No, no, don't do that, please.

Mike: Bruh, she's playing dirty.

Got to get your hands dirty.

But you know I hate that kind of stuff, bro.

I know you do, but it's gonna work out.

OK. Well, it better because this is my career.

Hey. It will, OK?

All the damn sacrifices I already made.

Yeah, man.

Speaking of sacrifices,

can't believe John did that for me.

Yeah, man. Believe it.

All I did was judge him.

I know, man. You told us.

Why didn't you say something?

Look, man. I was just as surprised

that he stepped up and took that responsibility, too.

I owe that dude a lot.

Heh. Wait. Who are you?

- What you mean? - I mean, what's

with all this compassion?

What you talking about?

You're Mike. You don't have

a compassionate bone in your entire body.

Thanks.

Oh, now you're getting sensitive?

Man, go on with that bullshit.

Don't tell me this is about Pamela.

Bill: Uh, yeah, it is.

Everybody's just busting in my house,

and, no, it's not.

You real comfortable, huh?

Bill: Yo. So peep this.

We was at the bar, right,

and he saw some dude with Pamela,

and he got mad, threw his drink on him and everything.

- Really, dude? - That ain't that crazy.

- Yeah, man. Wild. - So wait.

I'm confused here, Mike.

So you mean the side piece is making you

catch feelings now?

Mike: Yo. Can we let this go? Bill: Heh.

Thank you. Thank you.

We're here to talk about John.

Bill: Yes, we are. Yes, we are.

And about Pamela. Ha ha ha!

Can you let this go? Can you relax?

Bill: Hey. Tom: So, bro, what's the plan?

- All right. So. - Wait, wait.

What's the plan for Pamela?

- Can you give it a rest? - No, man. Nope. Uh-uh.

You been talking all that shit about me and Regina.

This is different.

Mmm. Now he admits it.

Will you stop with the bullshit?

I'm talking about John, bro.

Yeah, man. You so full of shit, bro.

You gonna listen or not?

Yeah, yeah. Hey. Give it to us, all right?

- Thank you. - Wait. Wait. Hold up.

What, what?

Yo. This place-- did Pam do this?

Hey. Come on, Bill. Let's be serious.

Bill: No. No, no, no. Shush.

She laid this place out right. Oh. Yes.

This isn't helping John.

OK, OK. All right, all right.

You done?

No. Heh. Yo. Look at this table.

Yo. Is this mahogany? No. It could be cedar wood.

- Get out. - OK, OK, OK.

Turnabout is fair play, all right?

Mike: Yo, Bill. Bill: Heh. OK.

I'm not playing with you today.

This is not the day.

Of all days, this is not the day.

- OK, OK. - Guys, guys.

What's the plan?

I think we should go to Leon,

tell him that John is out, and give him the money back.

And you think he's gonna go for that?

I'm gonna make him go for that.

You are? I mean, he is pretty tough.

- And what am I? - Mama's boy.

You know what? Fuck you. Fuck you.

Did you hear me? Look at me. Fuck you.

And you get your nails done, dude.

Oh, yeah, and your feet.

Fuck you and fuck you. Fuck the both of you.

Bill: Yo. So hold up, hold up.

So you just gonna step up to him just like that?

Just like I did to you right now.

No. Look, look.

John wants to do this on his own for real.

I don't want to tell John.

Oh, OK. I like this.

John's done so much for me.

He didn't say a word.

I think I should do the same.

Tom: Huh. Damn. Mike: What's up?

I like this softer you.

Give it a rest. Just relax, OK?

You know it's Pamela, right?

- Yo. Hey. Get the fuck out. - Hey, hey, hey, hey.

- Leave my shit. - Hey, hey. Yo. Hey, hey, hey.

- OK. - Get out. No.

I'm not playing, I'm not playing.

Tom: Mike, Mike. He's done.

Mike: He better be done.

He is, trust me.

Yo. Come on. Let's go.

Hmm. Where are we going?

Were you not just listening? We're gonna go talk to Leon.

We're gonna show a united front.

Bill: Say what? Uh-uh. Uh-uh.

Yo. You know, to be the biggest nigga here,

you a bitch.

OK. Wait, wait, wait.

So you think we should go over there?

Uh, yeah, you should definitely go over there

because buddy here is gonna need a doctor.

Oh. Well, if I'm going, you going, too.

Look. I got a yoga, like, thing before my next meeting.

Tom: No, come on, man. Uh-uh.

Mike: He's talking real shit.

Bill: I hope I'm not. You know, this ain't

gonna end well at all.

Mike: To be the biggest nigga, you a real bitch.

Bill: Yo. Come on. Yo, where we gonna find him?

How we gonna find him?

What, you just gonna stand on the corner?

"Hey. Yo. I'm Mike. Anybody know where the drug"--

No. "Hey. I'm Mike.

Anybody know where the drug dealer lives?"

- You done? - Fine. I'm done.

Tom: No. We with you, bro. Mike: Thank you.

I can find him, all right? We'll find him.

Let me get my jacket.

Bill: See, he needs his jacket. He want to look cute

for a drug dealer.

Mike: You're wearing a hat.

Bill: OK. Yeah. And? I look good.

Tom: You got to leave him alone, man.

Bill: Naw. He always running his damn mouth.

I ain't let him get away with that no more.

Mike: Yo, Bill. You got something to say,

come say it, come say it.

Yo. Heh. I did, all right?

- Say it closer. - Say?

Mike: Say what? Tom: Guys.

Mike: What's up, what's up? Bill: Come on.

Put them up, put them up, put them up.

Come on. You gonna beat my ass? No, no.

No, no. You too pretty to beat somebody ass.

Tom: Mike, Mike, Mike.

Bill: You think Pam can decorate my place?

This is really nice. Yo. Look at this color.

What is this, oceanic blue?

Yo. Hey, hey, yo. Hey, Mike!

Tom: You got to leave him alone. You got to leave him alone.

OK. Hey. This is serious, though.

This is serious.

We're trying to help John. Let's go.

Bill: All right. We're good. Mike: You better be

like this at fucking dude's house.

Bill: OK, OK. This is so pretty--

you sure that's not oceanic blue?

Singer: ♪ Ooh, yeah, oh, ooh, yeah, oh ♪

♪ Ooh, yeah, oh ♪

Ma'am, we're trying to pay for our food.

Man: What's your deal? Come on.

Laura: Here. Y'all take this shit and go. Bye!

Man: Oh, for real. Laura: So annoying.

John: Laura. Laura: Hey.

John: Don't hey me. Did you just give them

their food for free?

Yeah, I did. So I don't care. Shit.

Well, you can't just be giving food for free.

This ain't no free charity. You don't give food for free.

- Uh-huh. - That's coming out your check.

- It's coming out whose check? - Yours.

Uh...uh...

Uh...uh...uh. Yeah.

- My--my check? - Yes, your check.

Shit. My check ain't but 50 cents.

Sound like you gonna owe me money.

OK. Hold on, hold on.

Hey! I'm coming to get that money from y'all.

Y'all owe me! I will follow you.

Man: Crazy. Laura: I am.

Y'all owe me. Yes, you nigga. Who else?

You're not gonna be yelling in the restaurant.

You should have got the money earlier.

- Uh, these-- - Laura, chill out.

- I'm chill. - OK. Thank you.

You knew what it was when you hired me.

OK. You about to lose the job, OK?

We trying to help you out, OK?

- I need this job. - You told us that sad--OK.

I know you do, so chill out.

All right. OK. Where you been?

Opening up my other place.

Heh. Yeah. I heard about that.

I'm sure you did.

- Your mama not here. - I know.

How you know?

Because she's at bingo at this time.

Yes, I know. It's the only time I get to rest.

Lord, thank you, Jesus.

You got customers, Laura, and you got tables to clean.

Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

What the hell are you laughing at?

What the hell are you laughing at?

You don't do shit. Ha ha ha!

Yo. What? What'd you say?

It's the first time I seent you in weeks.

Nigga, get out of here with that bullshit.

You funny. You funny. You should be a comedian, nigga.

- Get out. - Nigga, look at my face.

Oh. Oh, oh, oh. You serious.

I'm as serious as your paycheck and as this job

that you not gonna have you keep on doing that.

- My bad. - OK. Get to those tables.

Oh. Ahem. You know, I was just playing.

- Mm-hmm. - OK. I just wanted--you know.

Yeah. Don't play with me. Go do those tables, Laura.

I'm not playing with you.

Yeah, but we good, though, right?

- Mm-hmm. - We cool?

Y'all talking about me behind my back?

Uh, yes, but--but no, but--'cause--look.

I just worked here. I--

Heh. You'd wait till I was gone

before you came in here?

Get your ass away from that register.

You know better than that.

Handle my shit.

Ma, ain't nobody scared of you.

You ought to be.

Laura: Yeah, Miss Alice. Mm-hmm.

He knew you were gone. Yeah. That's what he said.

John: Shut up.

You about to lose your job, keep playing.

What you doing in here?

What do you mean what I'm doing here, Ma?

- This is my business. - Is it?

Yes, Ma. I came to see what was going on.

Then what you gonna do when they raid the place?

What are you talking about, Ma?

Oh, they're coming.

Ain't nobody gonna come in here and raid the place.

- Yes, they are. - Yeah. OK.

Uh-huh. When they find out you using drug money.

OK, Ma. The question is what you gonna do...

- What you talking about? - Mm-hmm.

You the one that got warrants.

I got me. You just worry about you.

- OK, Ma. - Don't walk away from me.

Ma, I'm not about to argue with you, OK?

I didn't come here for that.

Good. Then shut up while I chew that ass out.

- OK. - It's the truth.

OK.

You didn't even talk to your boys.

OK.

Them boys are good.

Ma, you don't know what you're talking about.

You can't handle the truth.

You can't handle the truth.

Heh. Oh, baby. I'm all about the truth.

Well, if you was about the truth,

you would let that go and not keep saying

how great they are because they not that great.

- Well, they are... - OK.

and you are an embarrassment to your little bruhs club.

OK. You have more you want to say?

- Yeah, you are. - OK, Ma.

- Don't keep saying OK to me. - So what you want me to say?

I'm not about to argue with you.

That's what you want. I'm not about to give

you that, Ma.

Uh-huh. You running behind Leon's ass,

getting drug money.

I never thought in a million years

my only son would be selling drugs.

What? Ma, I don't even sell drugs.

- What are you talking about? - Well, you use them.

Ma, this is getting old, OK? This is really getting old.

As old as that cell they're gonna put your black ass in.

- OK. Whatever, Ma. - Mm-hmm.

And I'm not coming, not one day.

- OK. - I'm not putting one damn dime

on your books.

Are you done, Ma?

Neither is Bill, Tom, or Mike.

OK. That's fine. Anything else?

They're just as disappointed as I am.

[Door slams]

- Damn. How do you do that? - Do what?

Listen to that all day.

I don't know. It ain't easy.

Well, you make it look easy.

Hmm. Thank you. Appreciate it.

- Do you need a hug? - What?

I mean, I just feel bad as hell for you,

so do you need a hug?

Laura, no, I don't need a hug.

I mean, look. She gone. I'm a woman, you're a man.

- Laura, Laura. - It's only natural.

Look. I'm just saying. Let me comfort you.

Laura, get your ass over there and go clean up

or something, girl!

Laura, I will fire your ass.

Get your ass over there and do something.

Laura: OK, OK, OK.

Just choke me. Just choke me.

- Laura, I will beat your ass. - Oh, yes. Just climb up in it.

Laura, Laura. This is inappropriate.

You don't do that in the workspace, OK?

I don't know where you worked before,

but that's not what we do here.

Get your ass over there and clean up or something now.

- I worked at Magic City. - Your ass ain't work

at no Magic City.

Take your ass over there. Laura.

Laura: Just watch. Just watch.

John: What kind of Magic City you worked at?

- OK, OK. This is-- - Watch. Just watch.

Laura, this is--stop doing that shit in my business.

- OK. - Come on, come on.

Uh-uh. Come on.

John: Thank y'all for eating at A&J's.

We appreciate you. All right. God bless you.

Hey, hey. Hey. Y'all don't eat for free.

Y'all don't get a show for free.

Singer: ♪ Money, money, money on the floor ♪

♪ On the floor, baby ♪

♪ Can I tell you something? ♪

♪ You should throw it ♪

♪ I'mma, I'mma throw it up and let it flow ♪

♪ Let it flow ♪

♪ I'mma, I'mma throw it up and let it flow ♪

What's up? What's happening?

We came to talk to you.

Who's we?

Me and my boys.

You got ghosts behind you, homie?

Give me a second.

Yo! Let's go! It's a united front,

united front.

Bill: We're your backup.

What the fuck is this?

We heard you gave John 500,000.

Yeah. So?

We came to give it back to you.

- What? - Yeah. Yeah.

And you not gonna tell John about it.

What the fuck are you talking about?

You're gonna take the 500,000,

and you're gonna walk away from Level Twenty-eight Bar.

Heh. Man, get the fuck out of my spot.

I'm serious.

You know what? I never liked your ass.

I never liked your ass.

Naw. Let my cousin take the fall for your shit.

Didn't think I knew about that, huh?

I should pop a cap in your ass right now,

all "tree" of y'all.

First of all, nigga, the number is 3.

Ain't no trees around here.

- Shh. - Shut up.

You do what you got to do.

He didn't really mean that.

Mike: Oh!