All language subtitles for Six Feet Under - 4x01 - Falling Into Place.en

See, we think we know what we're capable of...

but maybe there's even more to being human

than even the scientists know, right?

I dig science. I dig oceanography the best.

I mean, this acid that we're on right now...

is made by science.

That's what so fuckin' mind-blowing about it.

It's scientific.

- I love you.
- I love you too.

Bruno, your...

your face is all, like, glowing from underneath.

It's like you're one of those lava lamps.
It's like you're made of human taffy.

I am.

- Let me try.
- No, come on. I wanna show you something.

I made it! I didn't buy it!

Hey, Bruno, man, nice party.

- Crambone, it's all happening, man!
- The moments?

The motherfuckin' moments,
they keep on coming!

Right, right.

Where are we going?

Higher.

Come on.

- We shouldn't be up here.
- No, we should always be up here.

See...

That's the tragedy of life.

- The fucking tragedy, Sandy, is we're all...
- My name is Cindy.

See?

That is a beautiful name too.

There are so many beautiful names!

I just want to tear every fucking name out
and love every name.

- And the hearts and blood...
- Let's go back.

No, l gotta go.

Bruno?

- I'm sorry.
- Don't be.

I had nowhere else to go.

It's not a problem.

Where did you get yourself so messed up?

It doesn't matter.

Some bar.

When do l get to self-destruct?

And when do you? I mean it.

I'm sick of Nate's bullshit.

I hate that he didn't come
to our mother's wedding. I'm sick of...

I'm just sick of everything
being so fuckin' awful all the time.

I'm sorry, but l am.

I'll take Maya tonight if you want.

No, it's OK, I'll do it.

It's obviously my thing.

- Good night.
- Good night.

- Sweet dreams.
- Thanks.

- I feel like I've been eating this cake for a year.
- I wasn't gonna say anything.

Well, l guess l better get going.

- You could stay over tonight. If you want.
- Here?

Yeah, if you're too drunk to drive or whatever.

- I could do that.
- What's wrong with here anyway?

- Nothing.
- I grew up here.

I've just never stayed over your house before.
That's all l meant.

You can if you want. That's all l meant.

Look, I'm tired, OK? My mother just married
some guy. Let me be edgy.

Be whatever you want, l don't care.

- So stay over.
- OK!

- Jesus.
- God.

I have to drive to Santa Barbara
to pick up her body.

- To pick up my wife's body.
- Go to sleep.

I can't.

It's all so impossible.
It's all so fuckin' impossible.

Just sleep, Nate, it helps.

- It's weird.
- What?

It's quieter here than over at...

Your place?

Yeah.

Yeah, it's quieter.

And stranger.

What's so strange?

The thought that l just got blown

in the same bed where my mom
used to read me The Runaway Bunny.

And The Five Chinese Brothers.

- Oh, God.
- What is that?

Ls that Claire?

No!

Georgel

Georgel

That was nice.

It certainly was.

I'm married again.

- And?
- Nothing.

I just never thought I'd be married again.

- Are you happy?
- Very.

Me too.

I'm sorry your children
couldn't come to the wedding.

Well, they were...

very busy.

I get it.

I'd like to meet them, though, sometime.

Brian and Maggie? Sure.

You know so much about my family,

and l know so little about yours.

I'm sure you'll meet them someday.

- At my funeral, if not before.
- George!

- If they even bother to come to that.
- George, I'm serious.

Look.

You've lived your life one way,

I've lived mine another.

The costs are different.

But l can tell you this.

Every day when l wake up,

I'm glad that I'm alive,

and if people don't like
the way I've done things,

that's their business.

But right now,

I'm so very happy I've found you.

And I'm looking forward, not back.

OK?

Do you think we were too loud?

It's...

possible that we were too loud, yes.

You don't have to say it.

I know.

- Bye.
- Goodbye.

Call me if you need anything.

Yeah, l will.

I waited up until, like, four.
He never showed up.

God, I'm sorry.

- No, l couldn't sleep anyway.
- Could you believe it?

I was completely scandalised.

I never knew the word George
could sound so obscene.

Good for them.

- Want some more coffee?
- Yes, please.

We have to get out of this house
if they keep doing that.

Out of the state.

Out of the universe.

- What happened to you?
- Lisa's dead.

Shit.

Her body washed up near Carpinteria
a few days ago.

- Some kids found it.
- Fuck.

It took the lab till yesterday
to figure out it was her.

- Do they know what happened?
- She drowned.

- She just...drowned?
- That's what they said.

- No evidence of anything else.
- But she could swim, right?

Yeah, it just looks like she drowned.

God.

So l have to...

go to the coroner up there and get her.

I'll come with you.

Thanks.

Nate, what happened to your face?

I got in a fight.

Good morning, morning glories.

I hope we didn't keep
any of you folks up last night.

They found Lisa's body.

- She's dead.
- Oh, Lord.

I'm sorry.

So am I. So am I.

Angelica!

Sweetie, l gotta be at work in like ten minutes,
David's going up there with Nate, so...

Wait a minute, honey, OK? Angelica, come on!

Gimme a second.

- Why were you so late last night?
- I was at work.

We had this body come in, this young girl.

You don't even want to know.

Thank you for taking such good care of us.

Angelica, I'm serious!

So... Keith.

- So what about him?
- Are you guys back together?

No.

He was there this morning.

He was a little drunk last night,
l let him stay over. I was being polite.

Polite and horny.

And horny. Thank you for bringing that up.

I never really thought Lisa
and I'd be together for ever.

I always knew
something would come along and end it.

I just didn't want it to be me.

You wouldn't believe the time l wasted
thinking, "Don't let it be me that fucks it up."

- And it wasn't.
- No?

Good for me.

You smell terrible.

Cavity fluid. Sorry.

- The smell of it just permeates everything.
- It always smells so cold and lonely.

But then also weirdly sweet,
like an old lady's hair.

That's Velvetone.

Moisturiser.

It's to mask the other smell.

I'll take a shower before bed.

When l die, l don't want any of that stuff in me.

- Yeah, l don't blame you.
- No, I'm serious.

I don't want to be chemicalised and boxed up.

I just want to be taken out to some open space

in the forest somewhere,
buried right in the ground.

Nothing between me
and the earth that made me.

You don't want to end up in a graveyard.

Nate, the whole world's a graveyard.

Anybody home?

- Hello?
- It's Joe.

From across the way? The guy
that you didn't... go on a date with last night.

Oh, hi.

Yeah. Come on in.

- Hey.
- Hey, what's in the bag?

- Are you OK?
- Yeah, I'm all right, l guess.

Well, what's the matter?

Oh, a friend of mine died.

- Oh, God, I'm sorry.
- Yeah.

- I can go if you wanna...
- No, stay. Stay.

I've just been sitting here
staring into space all morning.

I've got to get my shit together at some point.

- Chinese food?
- Yeah, yeah.

Do you want some? I got a little extra
just in case you were around.

It's not a date thing. It's just a neighbour thing.

All right.

You eat shrimp?

There is some salt and pepper shrimp
in here somewhere.

- I eat everything but mushrooms.
- I don't like mushrooms either.

They're too much like parts of people.

They just taste dirty to me.

- Here.
- Thanks.

- What's funny?
- I don't think I've ever had a neighbour

who just stops by before.

So, how is it?

It's interesting.

I don't want to go in there.

OK. I'll handle it.

Thanks.

This is the worst one I've had in a long time.

It's like those whales when they die.

- You know what happens?
- No.

Their guts turn to cream and explode.

All that's left when they wash up on shore
is a bag of blubber.

- This is my sister-in-law.
- Oh, shit, shit.

Shit. I'm sorry. I thought
you were here on business.

I am and this is my sister-in-law.
You shouldn't talk like that about anybody.

- Just wait, hold on a sec.
- What?

It's her jawbone.
They used the dental work to ID her.

And here's your death certificate.

- I can help, if you want.
- I've got it.

- I'm really sorry, man.
- You didn't know.

- I just need to drive for a while.
- That's fine.

Oh, God, Jesus. Fuck.

Oh, God, let's get the fuck outta here.

- Hey, Barb.
- Hi.

I miss her so much. It's so screwed up.

I know.

- You guys made it.
- Where's Maya?

Napping.

You have to come up
to Santa Cruz to the farm.

She'll have a blast and Hoyt
is so great with the little ones. She'll love him.

Yeah, we will. That'll be fun.

And you remember Simon and Shawn.

So, which one of you is which?

- Him.
- Him.

Do people ask you that
every time they see you?

Sorry.

How was the flight?

Very, very long.

Flying over those mountains
is a little scary to us.

I... l took a couple of Ativan.

But you found us OK? Once you got here?

Nope, good directions, no problem.

- And the hotel?
- Everything.

Those were good... good directions.

Love that MapQuest.

Oh, that's a good site. Hell of a site.

Extremely helpful.

I'm still a little...shaken up.

Of course you are.

My little girl is...dead.

You want to take a peek at Maya, maybe?

Yeah, that would be great.

- You're Michaela.
- I am.

- I'm David.
- I remember. I met you at the wedding.

I'm sorry about your Aunt Lisa.

We're not gonna have to see her, are we?

- No.
- That's a relief.

Are you...

- Do you think you want something to eat?
- Not me.

But l bet the rest of 'em do.

They all love to eat.

I have had this goofy feeling in my ear
for a week now.

I think it started the other day, you know,
when l took the boys to the beach.

- Angelica?
- What?

I was... l was wondering, maybe,

if it wasn't time for you
to start looking for a new place.

Is he making you do this?

- He is, isn't he?
- No.

- You know that's bullshit.
- It's time you got on your own two feet.

I have always been there for you,
whenever you needed me.

- And I've been there for you.
- When it's easy for you.

When it fits for you, you're there for me. Shit.

Watch your mouth in front of my kids.

I'm sorry, but this ear thing is driving me crazy.

- Angelica...
- No.

Don't even talk to me, Vanessa.
Don't even talk.

Congratulations.

I'm gonna go pack my things.

Come in.

- Can l escape in here for a second?
- Sure.

This house is crawling with people.
There's nowhere to hide.

What are you doing?

I'm trying to break my eye open.

Ouch.

That's what Olivier called it.
It's learning to see things differently,

without all the same tired associations

we've made all our sad lives, blah, blah, blah.

That one's pretty cool.

Yeah, that one is cool. They're all really cool.
It's fucking Nan Goldin, hello.

So you're back together with Keith, huh?

I don't know, maybe.

Do you wanna be?

What l want is...

l think l could be happy going back if l could...

Break your eye open a little?

Yeah. If we both could.

- Why? Ls it that hard?
- You tell me.

Yeah, it's the hardest fuckin' thing in the world.

Yeah, it is.

Are you seeing anybody?
Got a thing for anybody?

Are you kidding? Everyone is an asshole
who ultimately fucks you over.

I am totally done with that.

I'm thinking about becoming
a crazy hermit recluse.

- You won't always feel that way.
- Yes, l will.

What?

- Everybody's waiting in the dining room.
- ..kitchen.

Gotta go. Thanks for the hide-out.

Thanks for listening to me
complain about my cushy, alienated life.

Any time.

OK, here we go, gentlemen.

That's not what Lisa wanted.

With all due respect, Nate,

you only knew my daughter for a few years.

I think l have a little better idea than you
of what she would have really wanted,

if she hadn't been so busy throwing everything
in my face with her strange ideas.

- Mom...
- No, Barb.

She is getting cremated

and she is going in the family mausoleum
in Coeur d'Alene.

That is final.

- Peg, at times like these...
- The Kimmels have always done it this way.

Tell him, Ed.

We've got a real nice space set aside for her.

It's almost like a little chapel unto itself
up on the hill there.

That's not what she wanted.
Does that matter to you people at all?

Did she have a plan,
or a will or something that we could consult?

- Of course she didn't.
- Honey.

- She wanted... She didn't want...
- What?

She didn't want to be embalmed or cremated.
She just wanted to be put...

back into the earth somewhere.

No casket, nothing.

Well, that is just the sickest thing
I've ever heard.

Mom.

- To be eaten by bugs and worms?
- Yeah, well, you should know

that a lot of her already has been eaten
by sharks and fish and shrimp!

- Nate!
- Stop yelling at me... Tell him to stop.

She just wanted to return to the earth,
is how she put it.

Well, ashes to ashes, dust to dust, right?

Seems pretty clear to me.

I can't believe you don't want to honour
your daughter's wishes.

- It seems to me...
- What?

I think we all need to be a little more aware
of each other's grief right now,

and a little less aggressive.

It would be nice to do something that bears
some relation to what Lisa would have wanted.

Thank you.

But if that's not possible...

I'm sorry, l can't deal with this.

David, you're gonna have to deal with this.

Why not...

Why not what, David?

Let's all start to try
thinking in terms of a middle ground.

- Yeah.
- Hey, it's me.

Hey.

What's going on?

Not much.

Or a fuckin' lot, l guess.

- Where are you, can you talk a second?
- Sure.

Yeah. I was just on my way
to grab coffee with these...

two idiots who think they're revolutionaries

because they just went
to their first flash mob.

So the later l am, the better.

Say something, speak.

Well...

you know my sister-in-law Lisa?

She was missing for, like, a really long time.

They just found her body.

She's dead.

Holy fuckin' shit, Claire.

Yeah. It's really fucked up, isn't it?

Claire, I'm so sorry.

Yeah.

She's their girl. If something happened
to Maya, you'd be a nightmare to deal with.

- That's not the point.
- It's their last chance to be her parents.

- I'm her husband, so the fuck what?
- Should I, perhaps, leave?

- No! Look, you know I'm with you on this.
- I'm sorry, that's not fuckin' obvious!

That's because
I'm trying to keep everybody happy!

- It's working.
- I know it's not working!

I could go re-alphabetise
those unclaimed cremains while you guys...

- Arthur.
- Or l can do that later, also is good for me too.

You just tell me,
do you think it's OK for that fuckin' hydra,

which was what Lisa called her, OK?

Do you think it's OK for her to burn my wife up
in an oven and stick her in a drawer?

When all that Lisa wanted was to be outside
somewhere under the stars?

No, but what you're suggesting
is against the law. We could lose our licence.

Look, l know you want
to do a good thing for Lisa.

They do too, so do I.
We all want to do a good thing.

I'm over here.

What can l do for you?

I'm looking for someone to...

l wanted to make a confession.

- Do l know you?
- No, no. I didn't want to go to my own church.

Oh, OK. Well, have a seat.

We're not going in there?

We can if you like. But nowadays,
a lot of people prefer to do it face to face.

Well...

OK.

I say everything else the same, right?

Like the official way?

You can say it however you like.

Well...

I'm married and l have two kids,

but the other night,
l went to a strip club called The Seventh Veil.

I'm not really familiar with it.

Neither was I,

but this guy made me go,

and l met this girl, and l let her give me a...

You know? She...

She orally...

Do you know what the scriptures
say about marriage?

Yeah, yeah, kinda. You know?

I know the basic position of the scriptures,
and... whatever, yeah.

- Good. Do you know the act of contrition?
- Yes, sir. Yes.

Oh, my God,
l am heartily sorry for having offended Thee.

I detest all my sins, but most of all
because they offend Thee, my God,

who art all good and deserving of all my love.

I firmly intend to confess my sins,
do penance, and amend my life. Amen.

That was fast.

Hello?

Hi, it's me.

What's up?

I just wanted to know
when Lisa's funeral is gonna be.

Yeah, I'm here.

It's tomorrow, ten o'clock.

Do you want me to come?

- Honestly? No.
- OK.

It's just there's a load of people here, Brenda,
Lisa's family from ldaho.

- It's a mess.
- You don't have to explain.

- Is that all right?
- Sure.

You do what you got to do to get through this.

Yeah, I'm trying.

Thanks.

OK. Bye.

Bye.

My sister Lisa didn't believe in borders.

She didn't see the edges
and the lines in between things

that most of us think keep life manageable.

And this meant
if you were her sister growing up,

she would always come
into your room without knocking.

Or she would come into the bathroom
and open the shower curtain

just to tell you about some article she'd read,

or some boy she'd met.

And it meant later on that she would...

call me on the phone,
sometimes very, very late at night,

just to tell me about
a new recipe l needed to try,

or, more recently,

some new, completely amazing thing
that Maya had done.

Or about how well things were going with Nate.

It also meant that she looked for ways,

every day, to reach out
to the people around her,

to extend kindness to strangers
when it wasn't expected.

And to push everyone around her
to see the things that unify us with nature,

with each other...

With life itself.

Lisa didn't believe in borders and that's why
l know that wherever Lisa is right now...

she's...

everywhere.

She's everywhere and that means she's home.

- So you ready, guys?
- Yeah.

I guess.

This was one of Aunt Lisa's favourite songs.

One, two, three, four.

That was an amazing service, Nate.

Lisa would have loved it.

So where is she gonna be buried or scattered?

We're gonna put her ashes
in the family mausoleum in Coeur d'Alene.

Oh, good. Idaho, good.

See, l didn't even know she was from ldaho.

We've lost three friends in the last month or so,

it's kinda taking a toll.

Oh, you poor thing.

And we're not even 40 yet, you know?

What's it gonna be like when we're 50 or 60?

There's so much death.

And Maya, what is she gonna do?
She's never gonna know her mother.

I don't know how you deal with it.

- Thanks for coming.
- Yeah.

I'm just sorry
it's under such totally crappy circumstances.

But it's so good to see you.

- What have you been up to?
- Not much.

Making bad art.

Saying stupid things.

Continuing implementation of my master plan

to be completely forgotten when I'm gone,
and totally forgettable while I'm here.

- You?
- Not much.

I got an abortion.

When?

Like, right after we broke up.

So, OK. Give me a minute.

Did you...just tell me that

we got pregnant,

that you had an abortion and it was mine?

Ours, yeah.

And you didn't call me?

You didn't think you should at least tell me?

I'm telling you now.

Why are you telling me now
when there's nothing l can do about it?

Because I'm lonely.

Because l need somebody to talk to about this.

Claire, l could've been there.
I could've done something.

Russell, believe me, there's nothing to do.

- There would have been if I'd been there.
- Like what? I wasn't gonna have it.

I know that.

- I could have comforted you.
- With what, flowers?

Balloons?

- Believe me, you'd already done enough.
- Jesus.

- Look, I'm sorry that...
- Just give me a second.

OK, just...

Just give me a second to get used to the idea
of living with this for the rest of my life.

- Are you fuckin' kidding me?
- No, I'm not!

I'm not kidding you, Claire! It's fucking sad!

It's fucking sad and it's fucked up!

I mean, did you cry?

Did you?

I cried more than you have ever cried
in your whole life.

Then give me one fuckin' second
to feel bad about this, OK?

Just a motherfuckin' second.

- Is everything all right in here?
- Yes, George, we're fine. Thank you.

OK. Sorry.

Do you need me to come with you
to the crematorium?

No, thanks.

It will be good to have some time alone.

I could run by in the morning
and get the ashes.

It's on my way, Nate. It's cool.

No, thanks, Rico,

l told them Lisa's folks
have to leave first thing tomorrow.

They'll do it when l get there
and I'll bring her right back.

All right.

I'm really, really sorry, Nate.

Thanks.

- Well, I'm gonna go straight home.
- OK.

Say hi to Vanessa and the kids for me.

I will.

So I'll see you in about an hour?

Yeah.

You could take a handkerchief and drape it
over the top and you'd be in business.

Hey.

Hi.

- Nate's gone?
- Yeah.

I hope this whole thing helps him...

move on.

It probably will.

If l lost you, Keith, l don't know what I'd do.

You'd find somebody else.

I don't want anybody else.

I really don't.

And neither do I.

Then why do we...

- Keep fuckin' it up?
- Yeah.

Because we're human?

If there was a way to start over,

if there was actually a way to start over,
I'd do it, l really would.

But is there even really a way to start over?
Really?

- Just even in general?
- I don't know.

I mean, l was talking to Claire and she's trying
to see in this new way, you know, for her art.

I don't know how it happens.
I don't know where the new comes from.

The genuinely new.

God, l don't.

So stay with me. Maybe we'll find out together.

Things would really have
to be different though, Keith.

- I think so too.
- I mean it, l can't...

l mean,
l don't want to sit through any more therapy.

I don't either.

But...we have to look for ways to bring
the good things we feel about each other

more into the way
that we get through each day.

See, that sounds a little like therapy to me.

- Well, it's cheaper.
- Yeah.

And it's true, l know.

- Quit my job, that's the one thing l gotta do.
- You should.

I mean it this time.
Everybody in security is an asshole.

- Then quit.
- I'm gonna!

Jeez.

So did we just... What did we just do?

- Did we just get married?
- No!

- It seems kinda like we did.
- Yeah, well, don't over-think it.

Come here.

What were you just watching when l came in?

I have no fuckin' idea.

Well, put it back on, whatever it was.
Just something.

Very, very cool. Isn't this great-looking?

- Hey.
- Hey.

You must go through a lot of money
feeding all these cats.

Actually, l think it saves me money
in the long run.

This way l get to walk by all the homeless
people and think,

"You know, I'd love to help you out,
but l take care of cats."

You don't do that.

Yeah, l do.

That was nice, the way you dropped by.

No, that was selfish. I just wanted to see you.

Well, l appreciated it.

- Any time.
- Like tonight?

- I could be free.
- So could I.

Come here.

So what do you wanna do?

- I'm so sorry.
- Here you go.

Thanks for everything you've done for us.

Thank you, Nate.

I'm sorry things got so complicated.

I am too.

Well, things have a way of doing that, though,
don't they?

They do.

Well, bye.

Take care.

I'm glad you're in my family.

I'm glad you're in mine.

Come on, guys.

- Watch your step there.
- Everybody in.

So are you gonna go?

Yeah.

There's still some stuff to clean up
down in the basement.

I'll take care of it.

Thanks.

Oh, God.

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