Original subtitles

(Creaks)

(Gasps)

Now, then.

Look, Teddy!

(Thunder)

I'm sure we'll find one up here.

Right, you just sit there.

Da—da!

There's yours.

And here's mine.

(Bell tolls)

(Alarm clock)

(Ringing speeds up, then stops)

(Hissing)

(Water boiling)

(Honks horn)

Morning. Do sit down. Thank you.

And how are we today?

(# Strauss: Tales from the Vienna Woods)

(Chair motor whirrs)

(Continues whirring)

(Music reaches triumphant climax)

Open.

Good.

Another one please.

Open.

(Music continues)

(Sighs)

(Sighs)

What's in there?

Oh, stupid.

Hello.

(Deep voice) # Alleluia Alleluia #

(High voice) # Alleluia Alleluia #

(Sighs)

Ah!

Oh!

(Bells pealing)

Look, Teddy.

What's Santa Claus brought you?

Yes! Three.

Christmas socks!

Merry Christmas!

Look!

(Crash)

Are you all right in there?

(Muffled) Oh, yes, fine, thank you.

— Oh sorry, just drying my hair. — Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas to you.

Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!

— Cup of tea? — Oh yes, if you're having one.

Well, I might.

Have you got the turkey on?

Mr Spider.

Look.

(Whistle)

Can you get out of there, please?

(Revs engine)

A—choo! A—choo!

(Football commentary on TV)

(Cheering)

(Crash)

(Faint organ and choir)

# La—la—la—la—la—la—la—la... #

(Crash)

(Organ and choir)

(Sermon begins)

(Organ)

# All creatures of our God and King

# Lift up your voice and with us sing

(Mr Bean, out of tune) # Alle—lu—ia

# Alle—lu—ia...

# Thou burning sun with golden beams

# Thou silver moon with softer gleam

# O, praise him 0, praise him

# Alle—lu—ia

# Alle—lu—ia

# Alle—lu—ia

(Congregation) # ..lu...

# lu—ia

(Congregation) # ia...

# Let all things their Creator bless

# And worship Him in humbleness

# O, praise Him, alleluia

# Praise, praise the Father, praise the Son

# And praise the Spirit, Three in One

# O, praise Him 0, praise Him

# Alle—lu—ia

# Alle—lu—ia

# Alle—lu...

#ia#

(Commentator) 'And you join us as the Royal car winds its way slowly

'to the entrance of the Odeon cinema for tonight's Gala performance.

'The crowd cheers,

'their spirits undampened by the light November drizzle.

'And inside, waiting to greet the Royal party

'are the stars of the film as well as those tireless backroom boys

'who really make it all happen behind the scenes.'

(Clears throat)

(Clears throat)

(Exhales)

(Inhales deeply)

(Coughs)

(Yells)

(Fanfare)

Right.

(General chatter)

Done your revision?

Oh, yes.

|'ve concentrated on trigonometry.

I've done calculus mainly.

I believe that they concentrated on calculus last year.

Oh. Oh, dear.

(Suppressed snigger)

Quiet, ladies and gentlemen, please.

The exam will commence in two minutes.

Ladies and gentlemen, you may open the envelopes containing your papers.

The exam starts...

now.

(Clears throat)

Oh, Mummy!

Two minutes, ladies and gentlemen.

At the end, will those who answered the green calculus papers

please put them in the green box,

and those who answered the white trigonometry papers,

please put them in the white box.

Stop writing, please.

I said stop writing.

(Angrily) Will you stop writing!

'Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.

'Welcome to the demonstration...'

(Brass band)

Look! At last. Look, Teddy!

Now we can go and feed the ducks.

Let's get you ready.

(Birds twittering)

(Groans)

|t's stopped!