Original subtitles

♪ Go! ♪

♪ T-E-E-N ♪

♪ T-I-T-A-N-S ♪

♪ Teen Titans, let's go! ♪

♪ Teen Titans, go! ♪

Ahh, I am beginning to lose my patience.

- What else is new? - Nothing. Nothing is new.

That's the problem.

The crime alert hasn't gone off for an entire week.

And it has been the glorious week, indeed.

Filled with the doing of the sweet, sweet nothing.

Yeah. Can't you learn to relax?

No! I have an itch for fighting crime,

that runs so deep, it can never be scratched.

Ugh. You might wanna get that checked out, dude.

Whoo-hoo!

A crime!

It's Dr. Light.

Whatever evil scheme he has in store for us,

I hope it's extra sinister.

Titans, go!

Wait a minute. That's his evil scheme?

It is not exactly the sinister, but it is definitely the irritating.

And it's light themed, so at least he's on brand.

This is unacceptable.

Suffer my glint.

Are you kidding me?

You call this an evil scheme?

Oh, hello, Titans. Hey, Arthur.

You're supposed to be an evil mastermind.

But clearly, you were just phoning it in.

Well, I'm sorry if my scheme isn't up to your standards.

And I'm sorry for wasting my time on an unworthy opponent.

You, sir, do not scratch my crime itch.

Our relationship is over.

Wait. Are you firing me?

Oh, come on. You can't do that, Robin.

We've been battling Arthur since the '80s.

Remember that outfit? Whoo, doggy!

Plus, he's a good dude.

He helps us hang our Christmas lights every year.

And he obtained for us

the very good deal on the solar panels.

Dr. Light's supposed to be our nemesis, not our friend.

I would fire him right now,

but the superhero union requires that we give him...

...three warnings first.

Starting with this one.

But this is the only job I've ever had.

I don't know what I would do if I got fired.

I guess you'd just have to find another superhero team to battle.

He'll never find another superhero team.

Yeah, not in this market.

We can't let Arthur get fired, yo.

Then we must help him to become the better supervillain.

Sorry, Dr. Light, but your future is looking dark.

I'll do better. You'll see!

- It's Dr. Light! - And he's at City Hall.

I bet he's planning something super evil.

I hope so.

Titans, go!

There he is.

Let's get him, Titans.

- Stop right there. - Greetings, Titans.

Whatever you're up to better be worth our time, Dr. Light.

Oh, I assure you that it is, Robin.

I've even prepared an evil monologue to go along with it.

Ooh! I love evil monologues.

Okay, I'm ready.

Fear has a new name, and photons have no mass.

The soil beneath your feet is moist.

Yes, it's already too late.

Huh? What are you even talking about?

This monologue is so confusing.

Um... Hold on, hold on. There's more here.

Moist photons.

He's choking. We have to help him.

Um... Oh, here we go.

Now, don't try to get on my good side.

I no longer have one, but I am not crazy.

I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years.

And my personal tragedy will not interfere

with my ability to do good...

hair.

Wait. Are you quoting lines from Steel Magnolias?

No, I'm not.

I knew it!

You can't just quote lines from a movie.

Why not? Steel Magnolias is one of the greatest movies of all time.

Well, we all know that, Cyborg, but a supervillain has to be able

to give a good monologue on their own.

I'm sorry, Dr. Light, but this is your second warning.

Well, there won't be a third.

Comeback tonight, precisely at 8:36 p.m.,

and I promise to reveal my most evil plan.

Fine. 8:36 p.m. it is.

That'll give us some time to grab some grub, yo.

Arthur is so thoughtful.

You'd better be ready when we come back.

Don't worry, Robin. You can count on me.

Where is he?

Dr. Light was supposed to meet us here at 8:36.

He's probably just running a few minutes late.

It's 9:45.

Maybe he's making us wait as part of his evil scheme.

Ooh, the yes!

He is torturing us with the ill-mannered tardiness.

Oh, no, we can't let him win!

We gots to keep waiting.

Ow, ow, ow, ow!

We've waited long enough! I'm going home.

Crack an egg on it.

Ah, huge, huge hands.

Robin. Psst, Robin.

Wake up, Robin.

- Wake up! - What? Who? Ha! Dr. Light!

How did you get in my room?

We let him in.

Are you ready to hear my evil plan now?

No. You were supposed to do that hours ago. Where have you been?

Well, I had some stuff come up.

My car needed an oil change.

Then I had to help a neighbor get a lizard out of his house.

It's always something. Am I right?

No, it's poor time management.

I'm starting to think you're not even capable of being evil.

Oh, I can be evil!

- That is so evil. - Whoa, absolutely villainous.

That's not evil. It's just annoying.

This is your third and final strike, Dr. Light.

But wait! - You can't fire Arthur

before he reveals his big scheme.

He's been working so hard.

He's been planning it for months.

It's extra evil, too!

He's got henchmen and everything.

Henchmen? All the biggest names in crime have henchmen.

All right, I'll give you one more chance.

But this big scheme of yours better be good.

Oh, it's better than good.

It's diabolical.

Fine. Now get outta here so I can get some rest.

You left the light on!

Oh, please. Anyone but Dr. Light.

Oh, you. What's so funny?

The mighty Robin has finally been outwitted

by the brilliant mind of Dr. Light.

What are you talking about?

While you were sleeping, I took your teammates captive.

And news flash.

They're not coming home.

You've gone too far, Dr. Light. I'm impressed.

Now, tell me what you're planning.

I am going to lower your teammates into this vat

of light mayonnaise!

You won't get away with this. Titan, go!

- And... The cut! - How did I do?

Was I evil enough?

Oh, yeah! You were awful, Arthur!

And I mean that in a good way.

Okay. Places, everyone. Robin will be here any minute.

You're going down, Dr. Light.

Well, well, well. If it isn't the Boy Wonder.

Just in time to bid his friends a flavorful farewell.

- Hold on! - Sorry,

but I never hold the mayo.

No!

Titans, I will avenge you!

Henchmen, attack!

Ahh!

- This one's for Beast Boy! - Ahh!

And here's one for Raven!

- For Cyborg! - Ow!

And this one is for sweet, sweet,

innocent, sweet, Starfire!

Dr. Light! A little of the help, please.

Hey, you can't just leave us.

We're your henchmen!

Well, you're my disposable henchman.

And, and, things are getting a little too intense for me.

You are a terrible supervillain.

Robin was right. You do need to be fired.

Wait a second.

Raven? Beast Boy? Cyborg, Star!

The jig is the up.

So you didn't even come up with this plan yourself.

- They did. - Yes.

But I promise, that next time,

I will do it, partly, if not mostly, on my own.

Oh, there won't be a next time. You're fired!

Huh.

The lights aren't working.

Yeah, we already called the electrician.

Arthur!

- You're an electrician now? - That's right.

After you fired me, I couldn't find another superhero team to battle.

So I left the world of super villainy altogether.

We're sorry to hear that.

We still feel real bad about what happened, yo.

Oh, don't.

Getting fired was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Honestly, I wish it would have happened sooner.

- You do? - Absolutely.

I no longer have to fight, and I still get to pursue my passion of light.

And... Oh, there.

All better.

Well, you're much better at fixing lights

than you were at coming up with evil schemes.

All right, gang. Let there be light.

Ooh!

How's that for an evil scheme?