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1
00:04:07,106 --> 00:04:09,698
Dark Lord, hear our plea.
2
00:04:09,898 --> 00:04:12,302
Deliver us thy beast.
3
00:04:12,502 --> 00:04:15,262
Deliver us thy Avenger.
4
00:04:15,462 --> 00:04:18,022
We offer our blood.
5
00:04:18,222 --> 00:04:25,008
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
6
00:04:25,208 --> 00:04:37,184
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
Holy Satana, Holy Satana.
7
00:05:10,666 --> 00:05:11,456
Hey, sugar tits.
8
00:05:11,656 --> 00:05:13,966
We thought we'd
keep you company.
9
00:05:14,166 --> 00:05:15,181
The fuck, you will.
10
00:05:55,821 --> 00:05:57,196
Think we ought
to go after her?
11
00:05:57,396 --> 00:05:58,162
Hell, yeah.
12
00:06:06,373 --> 00:06:13,742
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
13
00:06:13,942 --> 00:06:15,236
Holy Satana.
14
00:10:18,124 --> 00:10:20,296
Hey, look at that sign.
15
00:10:20,496 --> 00:10:21,346
Bigfoot?
16
00:10:21,546 --> 00:10:22,196
Seriously?
17
00:10:22,396 --> 00:10:24,241
You don't believe in Bigfoot?
18
00:10:24,441 --> 00:10:25,323
Are you kidding me?
19
00:10:25,523 --> 00:10:26,206
It's just a scam.
20
00:10:26,406 --> 00:10:27,766
It's always these
blurry pictures
21
00:10:27,966 --> 00:10:32,096
on the internet of, like,
some guy in a monkey suit.
22
00:10:32,296 --> 00:10:36,426
I know, but wouldn't it
be wild if Bigfoot was real?
23
00:10:36,626 --> 00:10:38,706
I'd rather find out
the Tooth Fairy's real.
24
00:10:38,906 --> 00:10:41,506
At least she gives you cash.
25
00:10:41,706 --> 00:10:48,136
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
26
00:10:48,336 --> 00:10:56,856
Holy Satana, Holy
Satana, Holy Satana.
27
00:10:59,856 --> 00:11:01,746
How can you eat these things?
28
00:11:01,946 --> 00:11:03,136
It's a marshmallow.
29
00:11:03,336 --> 00:11:06,786
It's only the number one
campfire food on the planet.
30
00:11:06,986 --> 00:11:08,556
Yeah, says who?
31
00:11:08,756 --> 00:11:09,921
Everybody.
32
00:11:10,121 --> 00:11:11,156
Well, I don't want it.
33
00:11:11,356 --> 00:11:13,626
They're all sticky and icky.
34
00:11:13,826 --> 00:11:16,096
I'd rather eat a vegan hot dog.
35
00:11:16,296 --> 00:11:17,006
A tofu eater?
36
00:11:17,206 --> 00:11:18,266
Are you kidding me?
37
00:11:18,466 --> 00:11:21,436
You're going to make me barf
all over my nice and toasty
38
00:11:21,636 --> 00:11:22,396
marshmallow.
39
00:11:22,596 --> 00:11:23,876
Don't forget sticky.
40
00:11:24,076 --> 00:11:26,246
I can never forget sticky.
41
00:11:26,446 --> 00:11:28,986
Don't you like to get a
little sticky sometimes?
42
00:11:29,186 --> 00:11:30,266
Brandi.
43
00:11:30,466 --> 00:11:33,526
I think we should
get sticky right now.
44
00:11:33,726 --> 00:11:34,981
No.
45
00:11:35,181 --> 00:11:36,436
Brandi.
46
00:11:39,396 --> 00:11:40,476
Just a little bite.
47
00:11:47,546 --> 00:11:53,076
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
48
00:11:53,276 --> 00:11:58,806
Holy Satana, Holy Satana.
49
00:12:06,086 --> 00:12:10,676
Did I ever tell you about
the time my cat got kidnapped?
50
00:12:10,876 --> 00:12:11,796
No.
51
00:12:11,996 --> 00:12:12,716
Oh?
52
00:12:12,916 --> 00:12:17,746
One day, I came home from work,
and my cat was just missing.
53
00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:19,266
And there was a
note on the table,
54
00:12:19,466 --> 00:12:23,396
and it said, if you want to
see your cat again, bring
55
00:12:23,596 --> 00:12:27,526
$1,000 in small bills to the
backyard of the Taco Bell
56
00:12:27,726 --> 00:12:28,976
and leave it in the dumpster.
57
00:12:29,176 --> 00:12:29,276
What?
58
00:12:29,476 --> 00:12:33,136
So yeah, so we got the
$1,000, and we took it there,
59
00:12:33,336 --> 00:12:35,446
and we waited to see
who would show up.
60
00:12:35,646 --> 00:12:37,126
It's my fucking mom.
61
00:12:37,326 --> 00:12:38,351
Your mom?
62
00:12:38,551 --> 00:12:42,166
She stole my cat and
then robbed me of $1,000.
63
00:12:42,366 --> 00:12:44,216
What the hell?
64
00:12:44,416 --> 00:12:46,456
That's why I don't
live at home anymore.
65
00:12:46,656 --> 00:12:47,266
Your own mom.
66
00:12:53,096 --> 00:12:55,736
What the fuck was that?
67
00:12:55,936 --> 00:12:57,126
Probably an owl?
68
00:12:57,326 --> 00:12:59,911
Not like any owl
I've ever heard.
69
00:13:00,111 --> 00:13:02,696
Where have you
heard an owl before?
70
00:13:02,896 --> 00:13:04,866
Some nature show or something?
71
00:13:05,066 --> 00:13:05,776
I don't know.
72
00:13:05,976 --> 00:13:07,641
And owls are screamers?
73
00:13:07,841 --> 00:13:09,506
No, they're hooters.
74
00:13:09,706 --> 00:13:11,286
Speaking of.
75
00:13:11,486 --> 00:13:14,236
Seriously, there's
something out there.
76
00:13:14,436 --> 00:13:20,376
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
77
00:13:20,576 --> 00:13:47,400
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
78
00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:57,576
Holy Satana, Holy
Satana, Holy Satana.
79
00:13:57,776 --> 00:14:40,136
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
Holy Satana, Holy Satana,
80
00:14:40,336 --> 00:14:45,506
Holy Satana, Holy Satana.
81
00:14:48,656 --> 00:14:50,846
Blasphemy, seize them!
82
00:16:37,786 --> 00:16:39,356
Hello, Dr. Warbeck.
83
00:16:39,556 --> 00:16:43,186
Well, I keep forgetting
that you nuns have
84
00:16:43,386 --> 00:16:45,506
eyes in the back of your head.
85
00:16:45,706 --> 00:16:47,546
Is there something
you need to tell me?
86
00:16:47,746 --> 00:16:48,796
Straight to business, right?
87
00:16:48,996 --> 00:16:50,396
OK, well, here it is.
88
00:16:50,596 --> 00:16:52,916
We have a girl at the hospital.
89
00:16:53,116 --> 00:16:56,866
Looks like she's been
clawed by a wild animal,
90
00:16:57,066 --> 00:17:00,816
but she keeps talking
about witches, demons.
91
00:17:01,016 --> 00:17:02,976
Sounds right down your alley.
92
00:17:03,176 --> 00:17:04,296
And why do you say that?
93
00:17:04,496 --> 00:17:05,616
Why?
94
00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:09,046
Everybody knows about you,
Sister, about that time
95
00:17:09,246 --> 00:17:12,476
you performed that exorcism
on that little girl!
96
00:17:12,676 --> 00:17:15,455
Well, that's what people
are saying it was.
97
00:17:15,655 --> 00:17:19,106
Her mother is running around
telling everyone that you
98
00:17:19,306 --> 00:17:21,341
saved her daughter from demons!
99
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:23,376
I never speak of
my work, Doctor.
100
00:17:23,576 --> 00:17:26,456
The only counsel I require
is that of our Lord.
101
00:17:26,656 --> 00:17:28,446
Sure, whatever
you say, Sister.
102
00:17:28,646 --> 00:17:31,466
Will you please just
come to the hospital?
103
00:17:31,666 --> 00:17:33,461
We need you to
talk to this girl.
104
00:17:38,746 --> 00:17:39,566
I'm ready.
105
00:17:39,766 --> 00:17:42,361
Well, Christ on a
crutch, it's about time.
106
00:17:46,856 --> 00:17:50,119
I think we're going
to need some wine.
107
00:17:50,319 --> 00:17:51,536
We've got a
couple of six packs.
108
00:17:51,736 --> 00:17:52,686
I... I think we're good.
109
00:17:52,886 --> 00:17:54,906
When have you ever
seen me drink beer?
110
00:17:55,106 --> 00:18:00,746
I drink wine, rose wine because
it's pretty and pink, like me.
111
00:18:00,946 --> 00:18:03,746
Anyways, that's why I drink it.
112
00:18:03,946 --> 00:18:04,656
Sure, you do.
113
00:18:04,856 --> 00:18:07,026
Look, we're all packed.
114
00:18:07,226 --> 00:18:10,196
Did you save room
for my backpack?
115
00:18:10,396 --> 00:18:11,346
I... I'll make room.
116
00:18:11,546 --> 00:18:12,966
I don't want it squished.
117
00:18:13,166 --> 00:18:15,921
It's not going
to get squished.
118
00:18:16,121 --> 00:18:18,876
Careful, you're squishing it!
119
00:18:19,076 --> 00:18:20,106
I'm not squishing it!
120
00:18:20,306 --> 00:18:23,366
I just need to give
it a little push.
121
00:18:23,566 --> 00:18:24,731
A little push?
122
00:18:24,931 --> 00:18:26,096
Like this.
123
00:18:29,036 --> 00:18:30,224
You just did that on purpose.
124
00:18:30,424 --> 00:18:32,966
Baby, if we're going to camp
on Monteagle Mountain tonight,
125
00:18:33,166 --> 00:18:34,286
we need to get up there
before it gets dark
126
00:18:34,486 --> 00:18:34,836
and get settled in.
127
00:18:35,036 --> 00:18:37,078
I... I definitely want to
get sitting in our cabin
128
00:18:37,278 --> 00:18:39,056
before the bears come out.
129
00:18:39,256 --> 00:18:39,576
Bears?
130
00:18:39,776 --> 00:18:41,161
You didn't tell me
there were going
131
00:18:41,361 --> 00:18:42,746
to be any bears
on that mountain.
132
00:18:42,946 --> 00:18:44,057
Hey, it's a mountain.
133
00:18:44,257 --> 00:18:45,169
Bears love mountains.
134
00:18:45,369 --> 00:18:47,286
You leave them alone,
they'll leave you alone.
135
00:18:47,486 --> 00:18:48,786
Besides, you're
going to be so busy,
136
00:18:48,986 --> 00:18:50,356
you won't even notice them.
137
00:18:50,556 --> 00:18:53,728
And just what will
I be so busy doing?
138
00:18:53,928 --> 00:18:56,901
I think you'll
think of something.
139
00:18:57,101 --> 00:18:59,476
Are you sure you're not
doing the thinking for the both
140
00:18:59,676 --> 00:19:00,536
of us?
141
00:19:00,736 --> 00:19:03,796
What if I am?
142
00:19:03,996 --> 00:19:06,126
I want you to hear
something loud and clear.
143
00:19:06,326 --> 00:19:08,511
If we see one
fucking bear, I don't
144
00:19:08,711 --> 00:19:10,978
care if it's yogi
with a picnic basket,
145
00:19:11,178 --> 00:19:13,246
we're getting in the
car, no arguments,
146
00:19:13,446 --> 00:19:15,516
and we're getting the
fuck off of that mountain.
147
00:19:15,716 --> 00:19:17,276
Understood?
148
00:19:17,476 --> 00:19:19,036
Crystal clear.
149
00:19:19,236 --> 00:19:19,336
Good.
150
00:19:19,536 --> 00:19:23,106
Now, lose the beer, get me a
case of rose, and let's go.
151
00:20:00,386 --> 00:20:03,496
Look at me, I'm Raquel
Welch, and this pterodactyl
152
00:20:03,696 --> 00:20:06,806
is going to take me away
and feed me to its babies.
153
00:20:07,006 --> 00:20:09,286
Rescue me, Claude.
154
00:20:09,486 --> 00:20:12,686
Claude, look how horny
this dinosaur is.
155
00:20:12,886 --> 00:20:16,746
How come you're
never this horny?
156
00:20:16,946 --> 00:20:20,606
Claude, look, Yogi
is my boyfriend.
157
00:20:20,806 --> 00:20:25,066
Babe, babe, there's a 10-foot
grizzly right behind you, and...
158
00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:26,686
oh, shit, what's
that in his mouth?
159
00:20:26,886 --> 00:20:28,541
It's a head.
160
00:20:28,741 --> 00:20:30,176
No, it's two heads!
161
00:20:30,376 --> 00:20:33,516
Oh my god, that's one
fucking hungry grizzly.
162
00:20:33,716 --> 00:20:35,306
You think you're so funny.
163
00:20:35,506 --> 00:20:36,885
Let's see how funny
you are whenever
164
00:20:37,085 --> 00:20:38,264
you're sleeping in
the car tonight,
165
00:20:38,464 --> 00:20:41,836
because I'm not sharing
my nice, warm, cozy cabin
166
00:20:42,036 --> 00:20:42,956
with a smartass.
167
00:20:43,156 --> 00:20:45,416
Now, where's my wine?
168
00:20:45,616 --> 00:20:48,901
Well, actually, I was
thinking about something else.
169
00:20:49,101 --> 00:20:51,496
Uh, I think you really
need something else.
170
00:20:51,696 --> 00:20:53,781
Do I have to spell
it out for you?
171
00:20:53,981 --> 00:20:56,066
I'm sure you're
going to tell me.
172
00:20:56,266 --> 00:20:56,366
Yeah?
173
00:20:56,566 --> 00:20:59,146
Well, what I think you need
is some of that good old,
174
00:20:59,346 --> 00:21:03,256
patented Claude Miles
lovin' all night long.
175
00:21:03,456 --> 00:21:05,386
What do you say about that?
176
00:21:05,586 --> 00:21:06,176
All night long?
177
00:21:06,376 --> 00:21:08,496
I think six minutes
is more likely.
178
00:21:08,696 --> 00:21:10,616
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, you must
179
00:21:10,816 --> 00:21:13,024
be thinking of some other
guy, because no one accuses
180
00:21:13,224 --> 00:21:14,956
this fellow of
running out of steam.
181
00:21:15,156 --> 00:21:16,892
I think I just did.
182
00:21:17,092 --> 00:21:18,629
Well, we'll see.
183
00:21:18,829 --> 00:21:20,046
I have a feeling
that you're going
184
00:21:20,246 --> 00:21:21,926
to be waking up with
an ear-to-ear grin
185
00:21:22,126 --> 00:21:23,651
on that pouty face of yours.
186
00:21:23,851 --> 00:21:25,376
What do you say about that?
187
00:21:25,576 --> 00:21:26,156
Lucky me.
188
00:21:43,436 --> 00:21:45,776
Well, what do you think?
189
00:21:49,216 --> 00:21:54,686
Oh my god, babe,
this is so awesome!
190
00:21:54,886 --> 00:21:57,486
Oh, it's a rocking chair.
191
00:21:57,686 --> 00:22:00,336
It's so cute, oh my gosh.
192
00:22:00,536 --> 00:22:02,986
Oh, we can have a picnic.
193
00:22:03,186 --> 00:22:07,096
Oh my gosh, you picked
such a great spot!
194
00:22:07,296 --> 00:22:10,396
Oh my goodness,
oh, I'm so excited.
195
00:22:14,506 --> 00:22:16,516
I love it!
196
00:22:19,528 --> 00:22:21,986
So I was thinking maybe we
should move this party inside.
197
00:22:22,186 --> 00:22:24,416
You know, let
bygones be bygones.
198
00:22:24,616 --> 00:22:27,531
What do you say about that?
199
00:22:27,731 --> 00:22:28,031
Hey.
200
00:22:35,346 --> 00:22:37,031
What's this?
201
00:22:37,231 --> 00:22:38,916
Hm, let me see.
202
00:22:41,436 --> 00:22:43,096
Oh, it's a pentagram.
203
00:22:43,296 --> 00:22:46,596
I saw one of those on
an old Lon Chaney movie.
204
00:22:46,796 --> 00:22:48,246
Well, I like it.
205
00:22:54,066 --> 00:22:56,236
What do you think?
206
00:22:56,436 --> 00:23:00,486
I'm always down
with free jewelry.
207
00:23:00,686 --> 00:23:01,536
You wouldn't say that.
208
00:23:04,806 --> 00:23:06,676
Well, I'm going to go to bed.
209
00:23:06,876 --> 00:23:09,016
If you find any
diamonds laying around,
210
00:23:09,216 --> 00:23:12,947
don't wake me up for
anything less than 10 carats,
211
00:23:13,147 --> 00:23:16,121
and uh, you can unroll your
sleeping bag right here.
212
00:23:16,321 --> 00:23:19,296
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, if
you're sleeping in the cabin,
213
00:23:19,496 --> 00:23:21,192
then I'm sleeping in the cabin.
214
00:23:21,392 --> 00:23:25,956
Nuh-uh, newsflash, Mr. Miles,
we're not sleeping together
215
00:23:26,156 --> 00:23:26,416
tonight.
216
00:23:26,616 --> 00:23:29,036
We're not sleeping together
tomorrow night, probably
217
00:23:29,236 --> 00:23:31,656
not for weeks, not until
you learn to be a little bit
218
00:23:31,856 --> 00:23:33,156
more respectful and...
219
00:23:35,126 --> 00:23:36,846
Oh my god, what was that?
220
00:23:37,046 --> 00:23:38,566
Didn't I mention that?
221
00:23:38,766 --> 00:23:40,986
This is the woods,
darling, and the woods
222
00:23:41,186 --> 00:23:44,946
are filled with wild animals...
223
00:23:45,146 --> 00:23:48,186
vicious, hungry wild animals.
224
00:23:48,386 --> 00:23:51,426
Let's get in
the fucking cabin.
225
00:23:51,626 --> 00:23:52,506
Right behind you, babe.
226
00:24:14,536 --> 00:24:16,376
Dear Lord, protect your child.
227
00:24:16,576 --> 00:24:18,506
Please keep her
safe from the Beast.
228
00:24:18,706 --> 00:24:21,706
Keep her in safety,
and grant me the will
229
00:24:21,906 --> 00:24:23,251
to do your work here on Earth.
230
00:24:30,056 --> 00:24:32,546
I thought you'd
be looking for me.
231
00:24:32,746 --> 00:24:35,681
Child, what happened to you?
232
00:24:35,881 --> 00:24:38,816
It was a beast, a giant beast.
233
00:24:39,016 --> 00:24:40,306
He killed my friend.
234
00:24:40,506 --> 00:24:42,746
What was your friend's name?
235
00:24:42,946 --> 00:24:45,506
Her name was Ash.
236
00:24:45,706 --> 00:24:48,066
I will pray for her.
237
00:24:48,266 --> 00:24:54,016
There were others,
men in long robes,
238
00:24:54,216 --> 00:24:56,296
but they must have been demons.
239
00:24:56,496 --> 00:24:56,846
Demons?
240
00:24:57,046 --> 00:24:58,166
Are you sure?
241
00:24:58,366 --> 00:24:59,816
They must have been.
242
00:25:00,016 --> 00:25:02,576
They wanted the beast
to kill us both.
243
00:25:02,776 --> 00:25:06,586
The devil's servants
summoning a beast from hell.
244
00:25:06,786 --> 00:25:08,246
Take this.
245
00:25:08,446 --> 00:25:09,706
What's this?
246
00:25:09,906 --> 00:25:12,276
The devil won't be
cheated so easily.
247
00:25:12,476 --> 00:25:14,161
Wear it around your neck.
248
00:25:14,361 --> 00:25:17,136
Never take it off,
not even for a second.
249
00:25:17,336 --> 00:25:18,816
Wear it for protection.
250
00:25:19,016 --> 00:25:19,756
Protection?
251
00:25:19,956 --> 00:25:21,436
Against the legions of hell.
252
00:25:21,636 --> 00:25:23,686
I've seen their kind
before, and this
253
00:25:23,886 --> 00:25:26,076
isn't the first time
Satan's disciples have
254
00:25:26,276 --> 00:25:27,661
summoned a monster.
255
00:25:27,861 --> 00:25:31,176
Three years ago, I
found an innocent man
256
00:25:31,376 --> 00:25:33,981
possessed by Satan's evil.
257
00:25:34,181 --> 00:25:36,186
Half-man, half-beast.
258
00:25:39,156 --> 00:25:40,731
It still haunts me today.
259
00:26:09,146 --> 00:26:12,426
Sir, sir, sir!
260
00:26:12,626 --> 00:26:14,586
You need to come with me.
261
00:26:14,786 --> 00:26:15,576
Come on, it's OK.
262
00:26:15,776 --> 00:26:17,096
You need to come with me.
263
00:26:20,746 --> 00:26:21,246
It's OK.
264
00:26:46,846 --> 00:26:48,721
We brought you this.
265
00:26:48,921 --> 00:26:50,596
What is this place?
266
00:26:50,796 --> 00:26:52,096
Where have you brought me?
267
00:26:52,296 --> 00:26:54,576
This is our communion
of the spirits passed
268
00:26:54,776 --> 00:26:56,811
for our sisters of mercy.
269
00:26:57,011 --> 00:26:58,846
Now, what's happened to me?
270
00:26:59,046 --> 00:27:02,088
There's something
evil inside you.
271
00:27:02,288 --> 00:27:05,331
I sense it, the
Mark of the Devil.
272
00:27:05,531 --> 00:27:07,086
Something happened last night.
273
00:27:07,286 --> 00:27:08,336
It started to change.
274
00:27:08,536 --> 00:27:11,736
I felt like I was turning
into some kind of beast
275
00:27:11,936 --> 00:27:13,679
or something.
276
00:27:13,879 --> 00:27:16,296
That's all I can remember,
with the next thing I remember,
277
00:27:16,496 --> 00:27:18,046
I was looking at you.
278
00:27:18,246 --> 00:27:21,281
These marks on your
arm... were you attacked?
279
00:27:21,481 --> 00:27:24,516
Yeah, by... by a
monster, some kind of...
280
00:27:24,716 --> 00:27:25,396
some kind of Bigfoot.
281
00:27:25,596 --> 00:27:29,146
It tried to kill my wife, and
then I... then I killed it.
282
00:27:29,346 --> 00:27:31,806
And then, it... it
did this to me.
283
00:27:32,006 --> 00:27:32,716
It did more than that.
284
00:27:32,916 --> 00:27:35,736
It cursed you, with the
Mark of Satan's Beast.
285
00:27:35,936 --> 00:27:37,426
The Beast now lives in you.
286
00:27:37,626 --> 00:27:41,136
It came out last night,
and it will again unless...
287
00:27:41,336 --> 00:27:43,216
Unless what?
288
00:27:43,416 --> 00:27:45,811
There's only one hope...
289
00:27:46,011 --> 00:27:46,311
exorcism.
290
00:28:06,336 --> 00:28:09,666
In the name of the Holy Spirit,
in the name of the Sacred
291
00:28:09,866 --> 00:28:12,366
Christ, in the name of
the Father of Creation,
292
00:28:12,566 --> 00:28:15,906
I command you, leave
this mortal shell!
293
00:28:16,106 --> 00:28:18,106
Unclean spirit,
release this man.
294
00:28:18,306 --> 00:28:20,986
In the name of the Holy
Trinity, in the name
295
00:28:21,186 --> 00:28:25,761
of the Mother of Christ, I
pray, cast this demon's spirit.
296
00:28:25,961 --> 00:28:26,566
Release this form!
297
00:28:26,766 --> 00:28:29,496
Release this one from
your evil dominion!
298
00:28:29,696 --> 00:28:31,870
The power of Christ
commands you.
299
00:28:32,070 --> 00:28:34,244
The power of Christ compels you!
300
00:28:34,444 --> 00:28:35,236
Release him.
301
00:28:35,436 --> 00:28:36,228
Be gone!
302
00:28:40,196 --> 00:28:42,396
Leave this mortal shall.
303
00:28:42,596 --> 00:28:44,836
Unclean spirits,
release this man
304
00:28:45,036 --> 00:28:47,076
in the name of the Holy Trinity.
305
00:28:47,276 --> 00:28:50,206
In the name of the
Mother of Christ,
306
00:28:50,406 --> 00:28:53,136
I pray, cast out
this demon spirit.
307
00:28:53,336 --> 00:28:56,366
Release this one from
your evil dominion.
308
00:28:56,566 --> 00:28:58,886
The power of Christ
commands you!
309
00:28:59,086 --> 00:29:01,046
The power of Christ compels you!
310
00:29:01,246 --> 00:29:03,146
The power of Christ
commands you.
311
00:29:03,346 --> 00:29:05,246
The power of Christ compels you.
312
00:29:05,446 --> 00:29:06,409
Release him!
313
00:29:06,609 --> 00:29:07,572
Be gone!
314
00:29:17,366 --> 00:29:19,166
Obey the power of God.
315
00:29:19,366 --> 00:29:22,091
You will obey!
316
00:29:25,446 --> 00:29:26,856
Oh, god, help us all!
317
00:29:35,293 --> 00:29:36,876
You're going to
need a bigger cross!
318
00:29:45,640 --> 00:29:46,140
No!
319
00:31:56,706 --> 00:31:58,516
You asked to see
me, Mother Superior?
320
00:31:58,716 --> 00:32:01,176
Yes, Sister, I was just
speaking to the police.
321
00:32:01,376 --> 00:32:01,756
The police?
322
00:32:01,956 --> 00:32:04,356
Yes, about the death of
your assistant, Sister Jean.
323
00:32:04,556 --> 00:32:07,216
Ah, yes, Sister
Jean, such a tragedy.
324
00:32:07,416 --> 00:32:10,356
I gave them my statement, but
of course, I wasn't a witness.
325
00:32:10,556 --> 00:32:12,946
I didn't see Sister
Jean die, but you did.
326
00:32:13,146 --> 00:32:16,356
Yes, it was a nightmare,
something I'll never forget.
327
00:32:16,556 --> 00:32:18,186
I should think
not, since it was you
328
00:32:18,386 --> 00:32:20,196
who caused Sister Jean's death.
329
00:32:20,396 --> 00:32:20,596
Me?
330
00:32:20,796 --> 00:32:22,656
But Sister Jean was
killed by a man that
331
00:32:22,856 --> 00:32:23,706
was possessed by demonic evil.
332
00:32:23,906 --> 00:32:25,206
Which you attempted
333
00:32:25,406 --> 00:32:27,906
to exorcise in clear defiance
of the Holy Mother Church.
334
00:32:28,106 --> 00:32:29,481
That's not true.
335
00:32:29,681 --> 00:32:29,836
Isn't it?
336
00:32:30,036 --> 00:32:32,556
You know perfectly well
the holy rite of exorcism
337
00:32:32,756 --> 00:32:34,641
must be sanctioned
by the Vatican,
338
00:32:34,841 --> 00:32:36,726
something you
conveniently overlooked.
339
00:32:36,926 --> 00:32:37,606
There wasn't time.
340
00:32:37,806 --> 00:32:39,493
That man was a
tormented soul that
341
00:32:39,693 --> 00:32:42,276
had a demon inside of him that
unleashed a beast, a beast that
342
00:32:42,476 --> 00:32:43,306
needs to kill.
343
00:32:43,506 --> 00:32:46,306
And thanks to you, that
so-called beast did kill.
344
00:32:46,506 --> 00:32:49,926
It killed our own Sister Jean,
who faithfully served our order
345
00:32:50,126 --> 00:32:51,441
with humility and wisdom.
346
00:32:51,641 --> 00:32:52,756
But you corrupted her.
347
00:32:52,956 --> 00:32:56,016
You forced her to participate
in a reckless exorcism
348
00:32:56,216 --> 00:32:58,126
with no real proof
of possession.
349
00:32:58,326 --> 00:32:58,976
But I saw it!
350
00:32:59,176 --> 00:33:01,846
I saw that man turn into
this inhuman creature right
351
00:33:02,046 --> 00:33:02,319
before my eyes.
352
00:33:02,519 --> 00:33:03,986
How
convenient for you,
353
00:33:04,186 --> 00:33:07,126
Sister, all the better to lay
the blame for your recklessness
354
00:33:07,326 --> 00:33:09,406
on some imaginary creature.
355
00:33:09,606 --> 00:33:10,646
Let me be very clear.
356
00:33:10,846 --> 00:33:13,311
Sister Jean is dead
because of your actions,
357
00:33:13,511 --> 00:33:15,976
and I intend to recommend
excommunication.
358
00:33:16,176 --> 00:33:17,116
No, you can't.
359
00:33:17,316 --> 00:33:18,056
I can, and I will.
360
00:33:18,256 --> 00:33:20,806
For now, you are to be
confined to your quarters.
361
00:33:21,006 --> 00:33:21,986
That beast is still loose.
362
00:33:22,186 --> 00:33:24,103
There's no telling how
many more it will kill.
363
00:33:24,303 --> 00:33:24,746
I have to stop it.
364
00:33:24,946 --> 00:33:27,886
This is no longer a matter
of your concern, Sister.
365
00:33:28,086 --> 00:33:29,881
I can feel God's
power in my hands.
366
00:33:30,081 --> 00:33:31,676
I have God's power
to cast out demons,
367
00:33:31,876 --> 00:33:34,816
and I intend to use that
power to stop that beast,
368
00:33:35,016 --> 00:33:36,541
no matter what you say.
369
00:33:36,741 --> 00:33:38,491
Sister,
you will obey me!
370
00:33:51,026 --> 00:33:54,206
Hey, babe, I'm
going to go jogging.
371
00:33:54,406 --> 00:33:55,146
OK, great.
372
00:33:55,346 --> 00:33:57,476
Uh, how long do you
think you'll be gone for?
373
00:33:57,676 --> 00:34:00,086
I don't know, like,
three or four hours.
374
00:34:00,286 --> 00:34:01,536
Three or four hours?
375
00:34:01,736 --> 00:34:03,896
Yeah, I ate two
lobsters last night,
376
00:34:04,096 --> 00:34:06,326
so I have to go jog them off.
377
00:34:06,526 --> 00:34:07,856
OK, well, fine.
378
00:34:08,056 --> 00:34:08,591
Be safe.
379
00:34:08,791 --> 00:34:09,326
I love you.
380
00:34:32,285 --> 00:34:33,366
Hello, neighbor.
381
00:34:33,566 --> 00:34:34,576
Neighbor?
382
00:34:34,776 --> 00:34:37,806
I'm in one of the cabins
down the way, the brown one.
383
00:34:38,006 --> 00:34:40,926
I think they're all brown.
384
00:34:41,126 --> 00:34:42,786
You noticed that too?
385
00:34:42,986 --> 00:34:46,296
We have so much in common.
386
00:34:46,496 --> 00:34:47,156
Can I come in?
387
00:34:47,356 --> 00:34:51,035
Uh, sure, uh, I guess.
388
00:34:54,946 --> 00:34:58,186
Cute, you got the small one.
389
00:34:58,386 --> 00:34:59,386
We like it.
390
00:34:59,586 --> 00:35:00,386
We?
391
00:35:00,586 --> 00:35:03,136
Does that mean you
have a girlfriend?
392
00:35:03,336 --> 00:35:07,506
It's... yeah, she's
gone jogging right now.
393
00:35:07,706 --> 00:35:09,891
She would rather
be out jogging
394
00:35:10,091 --> 00:35:12,103
than in here cuddling with you?
395
00:35:12,303 --> 00:35:14,316
Oh, it's... it's not like that.
396
00:35:14,516 --> 00:35:17,311
Mm-hmm, OK, I understand.
397
00:35:17,511 --> 00:35:20,106
I... I don't think you do.
398
00:35:20,306 --> 00:35:22,566
You want to hear
something funny?
399
00:35:22,766 --> 00:35:24,676
Sure?
400
00:35:24,876 --> 00:35:26,626
So yesterday, I was
in the grocery store,
401
00:35:26,826 --> 00:35:31,086
and this man walks up to me,
and he asks me for my autograph.
402
00:35:31,286 --> 00:35:32,266
Can you believe that?
403
00:35:32,466 --> 00:35:35,351
Why did he want
your autograph?
404
00:35:35,551 --> 00:35:38,436
He thought that
I was a porn star.
405
00:35:38,636 --> 00:35:39,826
Isn't that crazy?
406
00:35:40,026 --> 00:35:42,456
He thought you
were a porn star?
407
00:35:42,656 --> 00:35:43,576
It's not that crazy.
408
00:35:43,776 --> 00:35:46,541
Lots of men like porn stars.
409
00:35:46,741 --> 00:35:49,703
OK, well, that's good to know.
410
00:35:49,903 --> 00:35:52,866
Who's your favorite porn star?
411
00:35:53,066 --> 00:35:53,986
I mean, I don't...
412
00:35:54,186 --> 00:35:55,126
I don't... I don't know.
413
00:35:55,326 --> 00:35:57,636
I... I don't really watch porn.
414
00:35:57,836 --> 00:35:59,266
Don't lie.
415
00:35:59,466 --> 00:36:02,601
Well, I mean, actually,
what I mean is, I...
416
00:36:02,801 --> 00:36:05,936
it's just not what I'm
thinking about right now.
417
00:36:06,136 --> 00:36:08,531
What were you thinking about?
418
00:36:08,731 --> 00:36:10,926
Well, since you
asked, there's...
419
00:36:11,126 --> 00:36:14,506
there's a giant Bigfoot
statue down the road,
420
00:36:14,706 --> 00:36:18,086
and I guess it's got me
thinking about Bigfoot.
421
00:36:18,286 --> 00:36:22,476
Oh, that would be
hot, Bigfoot porn.
422
00:36:22,676 --> 00:36:26,666
Bigfoot would need
at least two women.
423
00:36:26,866 --> 00:36:30,931
No, he would need at least
six women and two men.
424
00:36:33,806 --> 00:36:38,131
OK, well, what I mean is that
they call this place Bigfoot
425
00:36:38,331 --> 00:36:42,656
Mountain, and it kind of has me
wondering if he could be real.
426
00:36:42,856 --> 00:36:44,966
Well, what do you think?
427
00:36:45,166 --> 00:36:46,206
I... I don't know.
428
00:36:46,406 --> 00:36:49,761
It's... you know, it's a
crazy legend, but you know,
429
00:36:49,961 --> 00:36:50,436
you see people on TV.
430
00:36:50,636 --> 00:36:52,366
I saw a guy on TV who
was describing it.
431
00:36:52,566 --> 00:36:55,326
You know, he's claimed
to have seen Bigfoot,
432
00:36:55,526 --> 00:36:58,286
and he says he has these
big, black eyes, and...
433
00:36:58,486 --> 00:36:58,746
Yeah?
434
00:36:58,946 --> 00:37:00,681
What else?
435
00:37:00,881 --> 00:37:05,036
Well, said he
smelled like shit.
436
00:37:05,236 --> 00:37:09,816
Well, speaking of which,
I'm kind of grimy myself.
437
00:37:10,016 --> 00:37:11,486
You mind if I use your shower?
438
00:37:11,686 --> 00:37:16,680
I... I don't know.
439
00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:19,673
It's... uh, I...
440
00:37:19,873 --> 00:37:22,666
I don't... I don't...
441
00:37:22,866 --> 00:37:23,681
Thanks.
442
00:37:23,881 --> 00:37:24,696
OK.
443
00:37:39,996 --> 00:37:43,191
Hey, um, can I
have one of those?
444
00:37:43,391 --> 00:37:44,046
Um, sure.
445
00:37:47,926 --> 00:37:48,416
Thanks.
446
00:37:48,616 --> 00:37:50,476
Yeah, you need a light?
447
00:37:50,676 --> 00:37:50,976
Yeah.
448
00:37:55,206 --> 00:37:55,986
You all right?
449
00:38:00,086 --> 00:38:02,276
Have you seen anything
weird around here?
450
00:38:05,516 --> 00:38:08,971
What do you mean by, weird?
451
00:38:09,171 --> 00:38:11,683
OK, like guys in cloaks.
452
00:38:11,883 --> 00:38:14,396
Have you heard any chanting?
453
00:38:14,596 --> 00:38:14,886
Uh, I haven't.
454
00:38:15,086 --> 00:38:18,708
Is that something that
happens around here?
455
00:38:18,908 --> 00:38:25,556
Um, have you... have you
seen anything that looks like
456
00:38:25,756 --> 00:38:27,126
Bigfoot?
457
00:38:27,326 --> 00:38:29,906
I mean, there's a
statue down the road,
458
00:38:30,106 --> 00:38:31,296
but it's Bigfoot Mountain.
459
00:38:31,496 --> 00:38:33,788
I mean, I think Bigfoot is
one of those things you have
460
00:38:33,988 --> 00:38:34,986
to see to believe, you know?
461
00:38:35,186 --> 00:38:39,506
Well, believe it
or not, last week,
462
00:38:39,706 --> 00:38:42,416
Bigfoot killed my best friend.
463
00:38:42,616 --> 00:38:42,756
Whoa.
464
00:38:42,956 --> 00:38:45,236
And he almost killed me, too.
465
00:38:45,436 --> 00:38:45,866
Here?
466
00:38:46,066 --> 00:38:46,496
Yes.
467
00:38:50,046 --> 00:38:51,916
Oh.
468
00:38:52,116 --> 00:38:55,296
I'm sorry, but I really
need someone's help.
469
00:38:55,496 --> 00:38:57,106
I really... I have to find him.
470
00:38:57,306 --> 00:39:00,536
I have to do something
before he kills someone else.
471
00:39:00,736 --> 00:39:03,106
So you want to find Bigfoot?
472
00:39:03,306 --> 00:39:06,936
I, uh... I think I might be up
for a Bigfoot hunt, you know?
473
00:39:07,136 --> 00:39:08,001
Really?
474
00:39:08,201 --> 00:39:09,298
Yeah.
475
00:39:09,498 --> 00:39:10,396
OK, good.
476
00:39:10,596 --> 00:39:12,766
I just can't do it alone.
477
00:39:12,966 --> 00:39:15,606
Well, uh, just let
me know what you need.
478
00:39:15,806 --> 00:39:17,256
Are you staying here tonight?
479
00:39:17,456 --> 00:39:19,326
Yeah, it's me
and my girlfriend.
480
00:39:19,526 --> 00:39:21,396
OK, well, I'll be back later.
481
00:39:24,336 --> 00:39:26,176
OK, well, I'll be ready.
482
00:39:26,376 --> 00:39:26,476
OK.
483
00:39:26,676 --> 00:39:28,326
Let's find Bigfoot.
484
00:39:28,526 --> 00:39:29,146
I'm serious.
485
00:39:29,346 --> 00:39:30,141
I'm serious, too.
486
00:39:35,346 --> 00:39:39,996
So uh, how... how
was your shower?
487
00:39:40,196 --> 00:39:41,916
It could have been better.
488
00:39:42,116 --> 00:39:42,886
Really?
489
00:39:43,086 --> 00:39:45,941
You could have joined
me and soaped up my back.
490
00:39:46,141 --> 00:39:48,996
Uh, you could go to
jail for shit like that.
491
00:39:49,196 --> 00:39:50,096
I wouldn't tell.
492
00:39:50,296 --> 00:39:54,426
Well, my... my girlfriend, she
could be back at any minute.
493
00:39:54,626 --> 00:39:56,916
Maybe she really
likes running.
494
00:39:57,116 --> 00:39:59,046
Well, see...
495
00:40:00,306 --> 00:40:01,376
Are you OK?
496
00:40:01,576 --> 00:40:03,616
Ow.
497
00:40:03,816 --> 00:40:05,903
I have this kink.
498
00:40:06,103 --> 00:40:08,034
Do you think you can
give me a back massage?
499
00:40:08,234 --> 00:40:10,166
You look like you have
really strong hands.
500
00:40:10,366 --> 00:40:12,171
Uh, they're not that strong.
501
00:40:12,371 --> 00:40:12,858
They're fine.
502
00:40:13,058 --> 00:40:13,346
Let's go.
503
00:40:13,546 --> 00:40:14,461
That's... it's...
504
00:40:23,146 --> 00:40:24,246
Show me what you got.
505
00:40:24,446 --> 00:40:25,446
OK, come here.
506
00:40:43,076 --> 00:40:44,146
Oh, yeah.
507
00:40:47,786 --> 00:40:49,926
Mm-hmm.
508
00:40:50,126 --> 00:40:52,456
Yeah, that's it right there.
509
00:40:52,656 --> 00:40:54,986
You do have strong hands.
510
00:41:01,796 --> 00:41:02,886
Oh, yeah.
511
00:41:20,906 --> 00:41:22,761
So how... how's that?
512
00:41:22,961 --> 00:41:25,316
Uh, I think my carpal
tunnel might be kicking in.
513
00:41:25,516 --> 00:41:28,926
Don't fucking stop.
514
00:41:29,126 --> 00:41:31,526
Yeah, mommy loves
this, oh, yeah.
515
00:41:40,656 --> 00:41:41,336
Oh, yeah.
516
00:41:56,476 --> 00:41:57,736
Oh, yeah.
517
00:42:01,401 --> 00:42:03,198
Oh, yeah.
518
00:42:03,398 --> 00:42:05,196
Oh, yeah!
519
00:42:38,556 --> 00:42:39,666
OK, OK, OK, I hear you.
520
00:42:39,866 --> 00:42:41,861
I hear you.
521
00:42:42,061 --> 00:42:42,936
Bigfoot hunting time?
522
00:42:57,766 --> 00:42:58,676
What is it?
523
00:42:58,876 --> 00:42:59,666
Don't you hear it?
524
00:42:59,866 --> 00:43:02,144
The monks, they're chanting.
525
00:43:02,344 --> 00:43:04,186
I...
526
00:43:04,386 --> 00:43:06,846
Bigfoot must be close.
527
00:43:07,046 --> 00:43:07,656
Bigfoot?
528
00:43:07,856 --> 00:43:08,421
Monks?
529
00:43:08,621 --> 00:43:08,986
OK.
530
00:43:09,186 --> 00:43:10,096
Just listen.
531
00:43:10,296 --> 00:43:14,336
Holy Satana, Holy Satana.
532
00:43:14,536 --> 00:43:17,356
Oh, shit, I do hear it.
533
00:43:17,556 --> 00:43:19,906
Uh, OK, that's fucked up.
534
00:43:20,106 --> 00:43:22,456
Well, we have to find them.
535
00:43:22,656 --> 00:43:23,866
OK, how do we do that?
536
00:43:24,066 --> 00:43:25,076
Just follow the chanting.
537
00:43:25,276 --> 00:43:26,984
All right, let's go
get these bastards.
538
00:44:03,906 --> 00:44:04,866
Thank god, he's dead.
539
00:44:11,346 --> 00:44:12,151
Holy shit.
540
00:44:12,351 --> 00:44:12,651
Run!
541
00:44:42,126 --> 00:44:44,260
Fuck you, fucking
son of a bitch!
542
00:44:52,636 --> 00:44:55,566
Fuck, fucking Bigfoot!
543
00:44:55,766 --> 00:44:56,871
God!
544
00:44:57,071 --> 00:44:58,176
Fuck.
545
00:45:04,729 --> 00:45:05,896
How is that fucking Bigfoot?
546
00:46:36,186 --> 00:46:38,868
Claude, what's wrong with you?
547
00:46:39,068 --> 00:46:41,751
What happened to your hand?
548
00:46:41,951 --> 00:46:43,250
Stay back.
549
00:46:43,450 --> 00:46:49,701
Claude, what... what happened?
550
00:46:54,151 --> 00:46:54,651
Claude!
551
00:48:44,396 --> 00:48:48,356
No, no, listen, he was so hot.
552
00:48:48,556 --> 00:48:50,111
It was so worth it.
553
00:48:50,311 --> 00:48:51,843
And his girlfriend?
554
00:48:52,043 --> 00:48:53,399
She wasn't even here.
555
00:48:53,599 --> 00:48:54,756
She was out jogging.
556
00:48:54,956 --> 00:48:57,546
She doesn't care
about him at all.
557
00:48:57,746 --> 00:49:00,436
So he's lucky that I
got there when I did,
558
00:49:00,636 --> 00:49:03,126
because I'm so much
better than she is.
559
00:49:03,326 --> 00:49:06,206
I mean, I don't even
know her, but I was here,
560
00:49:06,406 --> 00:49:07,541
and she wasn't, so.
561
00:49:13,406 --> 00:49:15,834
What the fuck was that?
562
00:49:16,034 --> 00:49:16,176
I don't know.
563
00:49:16,376 --> 00:49:19,376
There's something weird
happening outside my house.
564
00:49:19,576 --> 00:49:22,916
Some kind of animal, I guess.
565
00:49:23,116 --> 00:49:24,396
No, I do not feel bad.
566
00:49:24,596 --> 00:49:27,281
I would do it again,
so let's talk about...
567
00:49:28,706 --> 00:49:32,066
OK, there's seriously
something outside.
568
00:49:32,266 --> 00:49:33,326
I need to go see what that is.
569
00:49:33,526 --> 00:49:34,346
Um, I'll call you back.
570
00:49:39,906 --> 00:49:41,926
Claude, is that you?
571
00:49:42,126 --> 00:49:44,916
Back for more, obviously?
572
00:49:58,626 --> 00:50:01,076
Jesus Christ, what?
573
00:50:01,276 --> 00:50:01,576
Hello?
574
00:50:07,901 --> 00:50:08,401
OK.
575
00:50:40,211 --> 00:50:42,596
Oh my god, fuck you, Bigfoot!
576
00:54:34,356 --> 00:54:37,442
Go away!
577
00:55:10,376 --> 00:55:11,876
Oh no!
578
00:55:54,996 --> 00:55:57,586
Dear Lord, our
savior, please guide me
579
00:55:57,786 --> 00:56:00,316
on this path to rid this
beast from this Earth,
580
00:56:00,516 --> 00:56:04,116
this demon from this man, and
release his tortured soul.
581
00:56:04,316 --> 00:56:08,316
As our savior, please help
me rid him of this demon
582
00:56:08,516 --> 00:56:10,881
and cast it out where
it belongs back to hell.
583
00:58:09,176 --> 00:58:13,121
Satan's beast, in the name
of God, leave this man!
584
00:58:13,321 --> 00:58:14,556
Cast you out, demon.
585
00:58:14,756 --> 00:58:18,752
You will obey the power of God!
586
00:58:24,791 --> 00:58:28,106
Satan's beast, in the name
of God, leave this man.
587
00:58:28,306 --> 00:58:30,161
I cast you out, demon.
588
00:58:30,361 --> 00:58:31,188
Leave this Earth.
589
00:58:31,388 --> 00:58:32,216
Go back to hell!
590
00:58:35,036 --> 00:58:37,378
Satan's beast, get back!
591
00:58:37,578 --> 00:58:39,721
Obey the power of God.
592
00:58:39,921 --> 00:58:44,286
Satan's beast, you foul
creature, I casted you out,
593
00:58:44,486 --> 00:58:45,436
you demon!
594
00:58:45,636 --> 00:58:48,626
Satan's beast, obey.
595
00:58:48,826 --> 00:58:51,616
Obey the power of God.
596
00:58:51,816 --> 00:58:54,676
You foul beast,
stand in the cowl.
597
00:58:54,876 --> 00:58:56,626
Obey the power of God!
598
00:58:56,826 --> 00:59:00,116
Obey the power of God,
you Satan's beast,
599
00:59:00,316 --> 00:59:02,706
you inhuman creature!
600
00:59:02,906 --> 00:59:05,021
God have mercy on your soul.
601
00:59:09,606 --> 00:59:13,156
Foul creature, I
cast you out, demon.
602
00:59:13,356 --> 00:59:15,686
Obey the power of God!
603
00:59:15,886 --> 00:59:18,216
Obey the power of God.
604
00:59:21,376 --> 00:59:23,596
Obey the power of
God, you creature.
605
00:59:26,956 --> 00:59:28,846
I cast you out, demon.
606
01:00:31,326 --> 01:00:32,266
Thank you, Lord.
607
01:00:32,466 --> 01:00:34,836
Thank you for delivering
us from this beast
608
01:00:35,036 --> 01:00:38,196
and casting its
soul down into hell.
609
01:00:38,396 --> 01:00:40,326
Thank you, Lord.
610
01:00:40,526 --> 01:00:41,454
Thank you...
611
01:05:45,576 --> 01:05:47,116
Good evening, friends.
612
01:05:47,316 --> 01:05:51,216
This is Zoe Lenore, and I come
to you with breaking news.
613
01:05:51,416 --> 01:05:53,836
There is a series of
brutal murders happening.
614
01:05:54,036 --> 01:05:57,486
Most recently, the body of
a severely mutilated nun
615
01:05:57,686 --> 01:05:59,596
was found on Monteagle Mountain.
616
01:05:59,796 --> 01:06:01,426
Police have since
quarantined off the area,
617
01:06:01,626 --> 01:06:04,986
and some speculate there's
some type of bigfooted monster
618
01:06:05,186 --> 01:06:05,836
in the woods.
619
01:06:06,036 --> 01:06:07,956
We hit the streets
to ask the burning
620
01:06:08,156 --> 01:06:10,036
question... is Bigfoot real?
621
01:06:10,236 --> 01:06:11,836
Do you have the
answers that could
622
01:06:12,036 --> 01:06:17,031
lead to this creature's capture
and solve these brutal crimes?
623
01:06:17,231 --> 01:06:18,996
I don't think
there's a Bigfoot.
624
01:06:19,196 --> 01:06:20,866
I know there's a Bigfoot.
625
01:06:21,066 --> 01:06:24,426
Last summer, my fiance, Melvin,
rented us a cabin up there
626
01:06:24,626 --> 01:06:26,843
on Bigfoot Mountain,
and we got there,
627
01:06:27,043 --> 01:06:29,261
and he's a perfect
gentleman, so he said,
628
01:06:29,461 --> 01:06:30,636
you sleep in the
bedroom, and I'm
629
01:06:30,836 --> 01:06:32,256
going to sleep on the couch.
630
01:06:32,456 --> 01:06:34,146
We went to sleep.
631
01:06:34,346 --> 01:06:36,506
Middle of the night,
it was pitch black,
632
01:06:36,706 --> 01:06:37,416
and I hear this thumping.
633
01:06:37,616 --> 01:06:40,796
My door flings open, and there's
this beast standing there.
634
01:06:40,996 --> 01:06:46,566
And he came over, and
ripped off my clothes,
635
01:06:46,766 --> 01:06:52,136
and ravaged me over,
and over, and over.
636
01:06:52,336 --> 01:06:55,031
Next morning, Melvin was
still asleep on the couch
637
01:06:55,231 --> 01:06:57,966
and said, honey, did you
hear anything last night?
638
01:06:58,166 --> 01:07:00,901
And he said, no, darling,
just shook his head.
639
01:07:03,596 --> 01:07:07,556
Some people are trying to say
it was Melvin who assaulted me,
640
01:07:07,756 --> 01:07:11,051
but I know it was Bigfoot.
641
01:07:11,251 --> 01:07:13,376
Melvin was a perfect
gentleman, like I said before,
642
01:07:13,576 --> 01:07:16,951
and he's going to be
the perfect husband.
643
01:07:17,151 --> 01:07:19,526
I just wish he'd do something
about that damn hairy beard
644
01:07:19,726 --> 01:07:20,026
of his.
645
01:07:22,866 --> 01:07:24,756
You want to know what
I think of Bigfoot?
646
01:07:24,956 --> 01:07:25,786
I think it's fake.
647
01:07:25,986 --> 01:07:26,906
I think it's fake news.
648
01:07:27,106 --> 01:07:29,221
It always has been,
always will be.
649
01:07:29,421 --> 01:07:31,608
And you can quote
me on that forever,
650
01:07:31,808 --> 01:07:33,796
because it is just
nothing but bullshit.
651
01:07:33,996 --> 01:07:39,146
So sir, I just want to know,
do you think Bigfoot is real?
652
01:07:39,346 --> 01:07:40,966
Right, there's no
such thing as Bigfoot.
653
01:07:41,166 --> 01:07:41,876
We have hunters.
654
01:07:42,076 --> 01:07:44,476
We have thousands of
hunters in the southeast.
655
01:07:44,676 --> 01:07:46,151
They scour the woods.
656
01:07:46,351 --> 01:07:49,906
They've seen every single little
crevice that you can imagine.
657
01:07:50,106 --> 01:07:50,996
They've seen every creek.
658
01:07:51,196 --> 01:07:54,316
They've... they've... they've gone
over every hill, every dale.
659
01:07:54,516 --> 01:07:55,106
They've done it.
660
01:07:55,306 --> 01:07:58,279
If there was a Bigfoot, they
would have found it by now.
661
01:07:58,479 --> 01:08:00,422
It's been nothing but
a lie this whole time.
662
01:08:00,622 --> 01:08:02,469
It's always been fake,
and all these people
663
01:08:02,669 --> 01:08:04,516
who go around saying
that Bigfoot is real
664
01:08:04,716 --> 01:08:06,026
are full of nothing but shit.
665
01:08:06,226 --> 01:08:08,606
Uh, if you go to,
uh... to the Himalayas,
666
01:08:08,806 --> 01:08:13,083
you've got idiots lining up to
die climbing up that mountain.
667
01:08:13,283 --> 01:08:13,466
They're there.
668
01:08:13,666 --> 01:08:15,226
They're there with
their cameras.
669
01:08:15,426 --> 01:08:16,856
They're looking everywhere.
670
01:08:17,056 --> 01:08:19,136
And that's where
supposedly the...
671
01:08:19,336 --> 01:08:21,916
I think they call it Yeti
there as opposed to...
672
01:08:22,116 --> 01:08:23,785
to Sasquatch or Bigfoot.
673
01:08:23,985 --> 01:08:26,386
But you've got all
these areas that
674
01:08:26,586 --> 01:08:28,395
say they've got a claim to it.
675
01:08:28,595 --> 01:08:30,205
None of them have any evidence.
676
01:08:30,405 --> 01:08:33,136
There's that really, really
grainy film that's probably
677
01:08:33,336 --> 01:08:35,445
a guy wearing a stupid suit.
678
01:08:35,645 --> 01:08:36,975
We don't need that.
679
01:08:37,175 --> 01:08:38,306
Doesn't prove anything.
680
01:08:38,506 --> 01:08:40,701
They can't demonstrate that.
681
01:08:40,901 --> 01:08:42,896
It's just, there's no evidence.
682
01:08:43,096 --> 01:08:46,130
I'm telling you, it's
fake, it's always been fake,
683
01:08:46,330 --> 01:08:49,365
and I swear to you, you can
quote me on that forever!
684
01:08:49,565 --> 01:08:52,260
At this point, there
have been so many eyes
685
01:08:52,460 --> 01:08:55,155
put on this project, so
many people that have...
686
01:08:55,355 --> 01:08:57,466
have had an opportunity
to look, and they
687
01:08:57,666 --> 01:08:58,756
haven't found anything.
688
01:08:58,956 --> 01:09:00,706
Eventually, you got
to throw up your hands
689
01:09:00,906 --> 01:09:02,626
and say, no, we've had hunters.
690
01:09:02,826 --> 01:09:04,256
We've had hikers.
691
01:09:04,456 --> 01:09:07,916
We've had, well,
idiots that get lost.
692
01:09:08,116 --> 01:09:10,711
Nobody's found a damn thing.
693
01:09:10,911 --> 01:09:11,276
It's done.
694
01:09:11,476 --> 01:09:13,136
There is no Bigfoot.
695
01:09:13,336 --> 01:09:14,841
Bigfoot is nothing
but bullshit.
696
01:09:15,041 --> 01:09:16,346
It has been a lie
the whole time,
697
01:09:16,546 --> 01:09:18,976
and all these people going
around saying, Bigfoot is real.
698
01:09:19,176 --> 01:09:20,426
Oh, it's some scary
hairy monster,
699
01:09:20,626 --> 01:09:22,796
and it's been going
on for so many years.
700
01:09:22,996 --> 01:09:25,786
All I've heard about is this
Bigfoot creature my whole life.
701
01:09:25,986 --> 01:09:28,606
It's been a lie this whole
time, and all these people
702
01:09:28,806 --> 01:09:30,535
are full of shit and
nothing but shit.
703
01:09:30,735 --> 01:09:32,639
They just... I don't know
what kind of alcohol
704
01:09:32,839 --> 01:09:33,356
they've been drinking.
705
01:09:33,556 --> 01:09:36,476
They're nothing but drunk
rednecks who don't know nothing
706
01:09:36,676 --> 01:09:37,056
about nothing.
707
01:09:37,256 --> 01:09:39,655
And I swear to God, I'm
sick of hearing these lies,
708
01:09:39,855 --> 01:09:41,966
and you can quote
me on this forever.
709
01:09:42,166 --> 01:09:43,731
You heard what
my daughter said.
710
01:09:43,931 --> 01:09:47,275
Anybody that thinks Bigfoot is
real is full of donkey doodoo.
711
01:09:47,475 --> 01:09:49,025
There is no Bigfoot.
49810
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