Original subtitles

You do see who it is, don't you, Joe?

Look more closely.

It's him!- .

It's the old Punch and Judy man.

But you said Ramon was dead.

I said they show his tomb at Palma.

But he must be 500...

...700 years old.

With the power of the past and the power of the future

in his magic mind,

and although his mind may be fading,

untold other magic powers as well.

Now do you see,

you mutineering doddlehead,

why I do not dare risk hurting or threatening the old man?

Yes.

Well...

If we could get hold of this Elixir thing -

is it like a cough mixture? -

and put it on the market,

I reckon it would sell like hot cakes.

Cretinous Joel.

Are you still feeling mutinous?

Mutinous? Me?

All I say is, we still don't know why you're scrobbling

all these clergymen.

The Box has disappeared,

either at Seekings,

perhaps at the Bishop's Palace at Tatchester.

And until it is recovered,

not one of them will be released.

But the morning paper...

You've got the Church all over the country up in arms.

It's their service tonight in the cathedral -

been held every year for a thousand years.

Naturally, they'll do everything

to see that it goes ahead.

If the Box is not delivered to me by midnight tonight,

I will stop their precious ceremony

if it's the last thing I do.

Chief, I've got a suggestion.

It says the Archbishop is offering a reward

of ?1,000 for the return of the Bishop,

with reduced sums for all the rest.

It's 25 quid even for a choirboy,

and we scrobbled a lot of those.

Well, couldn't we, um...

...make a Christmas gesture...

...before the whole world

- turns against us? - Get out.

There's one thing I can't understand, boss.

I cannot for the life of me understand.

- That boy at Seekings... - Kay Harker.

Well, I don't see why Cole Hawlings

shouldn't have given the Box to him,

yet he's the one person you leave unscrobbled.

Joe, I have it on the authority of my Pouncer

that the boy is an idle muff.

That the ageless and shrewd, eternally wise Cole Hawlings

would entrust the greatest magic device of all time

to an insignificant brat is nonsense.

Come, Joe, it is Christmas.

Let us bury the hatchet.

We shall have breakfast,

and then I will go over to Tatchester Almshouse

and deliver my Christmas lecture to the pensioners

in my other persona...

...as the Reverend Boddledale.

But we shall meet here again

at half-past two this afternoon...

...to talk over our final plan.

Right.

I shall also be here at half-past two,

Mr Abner Brown.

Hello, Master Harker. What is it this time?

Inspector, how would you like to win the Archbishop's reward

of ?1,000?

And how do you think I might?

Go to the Tatchester Barracks, fall out the Tatshire Blues

and raid the Chester Hills Missionary College.

You'll find the missing clergyman there.

I'm sure you will.

How you run on about that college Master Harker ,.

Now, this is what is known in medical circles

as an obsession.

- But I've been there . - Have a bull's-eye.

Thank you.

It's too much studying, Master Harker.

It's turned your mind.

Stand by, driver. Keep the engine running.

Inspector come along ,. We need every man we can get.

Cripes.

We're giving police protection to Tatchester Cathedral,

and all the clergy who are trying to reach it

to save the midnight service. Who's this?

Ah, now, this, Chief Constable, is Master Harker.

He's a very good lad,

except for his obsession.

Obsession?

He cannot get it out of his mind

that the Reverend Boddledale of our glee club

is a master crook.

Nonsense, boy. Eat your bull's-eye.

Come along, Inspector.

Sir.

...utmost urgency, a combined operation.

Right-oh, driver.

Kay! . We missed you at breakfast.

If you've been having adventures

and leaving us out...

Do be quiet, Maria. Kay, any news of Peter?

Herne. Herne the Hunter, please come,

for I know now who is the key to all the trouble.

Herne.

I know what you want, young Kay.

You want to find Arnold of Todi.

Yes.

It's his Box, you see.

And if it were returned to him, all this hunting for it

and scrobbling people for it would stop.

But Arnold of Todi went back into the past

and has been lost in it somewhere ever since.

Couldn't I find him?

Kay, the past is a great book with many, many pages.

How could you find him?

With the Box.

Ah, the Box.

It gives you the power to go into the past,

but you cannot take it with you.

He who dares goes at his own risk

and must find his own way back.

I'll take that risk.

You're very brave.

There is one chance.

It won't be quite you,

but a shadow of you that goes.

If we from here can call you strongly enough

through the sleeping you that remains,

you may,

no certainty,

but you may get safely back.

I'm ready.

Be careful.

The you that goes will cast no shadow,

and those you'll meet will not like that.

Are you sure you want to go?

Yes.

So, what skulking Trojan is this, trying to escape?

I'm not a Trojan.

- I'm from Condicote, England. - Captain.

- I've come... - Captain.

There's another of them.

But he's got no shadow.

Well, neither he has. Not a sign of a shadow.

Well, that's bad luck, boy...

...for you.

We'll soon settle him, Captain.

One good whack with this will let the shadow out

he's got tucked away inside him.

No. Let's hang the sculpin up by his heels till the shadow

falls out of him, I say.

Silence.

The God of War smiles upon those

who use their cunning.

Once before, when we came upon a barbarian of this sort,

how did we deal with him?

We marooned him on the nearest island.

Oh!.

Well, you have your orders.

Obey.

No!- .

Help!.

No!.

And what is worse

I sometimes fear

It isn't Now at all that's here

No, but Next Year

Next Year or worse

Some year beyond

In future time

Unkenned, unconned

As far away from Trebizond as Todi Weir

And this I ask, and fain would know

Will Now be in a day or so?

Is this-time-next-year Now or no?

Or did Now happen long ago

Long, long ago?

Or was Tomorrow Yesterday?

Or has it been and gone Today?

Will no-one say?

I wish someone would say.

Ah.

Italiano?

Francais?

No.

English.

Not English, no. The English have tails.

It is well known. The English have tails.

The English haven't got tails.

You have not, so you are not English.

What year in anno Domini is this?

1934.

Nineteen...

Nineteen hundred and...

In the Future or the Present?

The present.

I think.

What a thing is Time.

I've got quite lost in Time.

I know, sir. You are Arnold of Todi?

I was once, but I would have none of it.

I went back into the Past.

- Why? - Why?

Because my own Time was dull, of course.

Would you tell me how you got back into the Past?

Ah.

I made a Box.

A Box of Delights.

Do you know, a man once came all the way from Spain

to offer me his Elixir of Life in return for my Box?

But I refused to give it.

And now I know not where it is, nor where I am.

Why did you refuse?

I've forgotten.

It seemed important at the time.

Sir, I have your Box of Delights,

although it really belongs to the man

who came to you with the Elixir.

He still lives on in your time?

And his Elixir works? Magnificent.

But as for my Box, it's no more than a silly little toy.

A toy?

A silly little...

That Box is very, very powerful,

and has caused no end of trouble in my own time

and in my own town.

If you would only come and take it back into ancient time,

it wouldn't exist in our time any more,

and no-one could claim it.

Come back to...?

Tatshire, England.

1934.

What a charming idea.

But I don't want it.

You mean I've come all this way into the past for nothing,

and nearly got myself killed by soldiers

and little boats on big oceans?

And now you say...

I do not want that Box.

And you, I must say,

are an impertinent, ignorant and insolent boy,

because it is a matter of absolute fact,

according to all the very best textbooks,

that the English do have tails.

You want the Past?

I'll send you back...

...back, back where you'll never be found.

Herne.

Herne the Hunter.

Kay! Kay! Come back!

I can't get back.

If only they'd all call for me.

Where's Kay?

- Kay! . - Kay!.

- Kay! - Kay!

Kay!.

- Kay! . - Kay!.

Kay!.

Kay!

Kay!

- Kay! . - Kay!.

Kay!.

Kay!

Kay!.

Kay, are you all right?

Kay, are you there?

Oh, really, Kay.

Kay, do wake up.

It's time for lunch.

Kay!.

What a lot of groaning and yelping.

Were you having a dream?

It seemed very real.

Thanks, Jemima. Thanks for calling me back.

Come along. It's after one o'clock.

And I have an important appointment at half-past two.

What did you say?

I said, while you was off

giving your sermon to the pensioners,

I've made up my mind.

I didn't know you had a mind to make up.

Boss, tomorrow's Christmas Day.

I want you to return all the captives tonight

with a ?10 note of peace from our last bank robbery.

Then the whole thing will pass off as a rag,

and would tell in our favour if we ever do come to be tried.

I see. Anything else?

Yes.

If you're so full of magic as you say you are,

why don't you use your magic to find the missing Box?

What do you want with me now?

Don't be pert with me, boy,

or I'll send you back for another eternity

under the waterfall.

Tell the gentleman what Cole Hawlings has done with the Box.

Given it to somebody to keep for him.

He put spells around it, so I don't know who.

Am I any nearer to getting the Box?

You're very near to it.

You shall have it under your hand today.

Under my hand?

Mm-hm.

Under my hand today.

And you tell me to give the whole thing up

just when I'm within an ace of winning.

Let me go, can't you?

Set me free from the waterfall?

Never.

For you see things from there that no-one else can see.

Anything you want to ask the boy, Joe?

Yeah.

What's in this blessed Box?

It can make you go small and it can make you go swift

and it is full of wonders.

Anything else?

What will win the Grand National?

Kubbadar - by seven lengths.

Get back to your waterfall.

Argh.

And I'll be very surprised if I ever let you out again.

Well, Joe.

I think you and I should take a little walk.

My dungeons.

My precious dungeons,

deep, deep in the Earth.

And how is the dear Bishop?

Will you tell me where that package is?

You ruffian.

I know nothing of any package.

These pleasantries must cease.

Stubborn.

Stubborn You're all stubborn..

But I am stubborn, too.

And the Earth is stubborn.

Whoever knows where that package is and tells me,

you will all be home by late tonight.

If not...

...I will last, and the Earth will last.

But on dry bread and water,

I don't think you will.

Joe.

Do you remember the cell we put the Earl into?

About seven years ago, wasn't it?

He didn't pay his ransom, did he?

Step inside and see if his bones are still there.

Oh, yes, I remember the Earl.

Very stubborn.

Joe...

Joe with the made-up mind...

...hot for mutiny.

Stay here and rot for ever.

Under my hand...

I shall have the Box today under my hand.

Strange...

Why do I think of that detestable child Kay Harker?

Why should he come into my mind now?

Well, he had better not come into my presence.

Fear not Abner ,.

Time to count and enjoy your jewels.

Pearls and diamonds.

Oh my rubies and sapphires ,.

Every robbery, every raid on every wealthy house.

But are you enough for what Abner plans?

Well, let's check.

300,000.

400,000.

Half a million.

Enough for you to retire on Abner Do it ,..

Do it today.

Flit off to some far country and let the others go hang.

I'd go this minute if I could only get my hands on that Box.

Drat it.

But before I go...

Sylvia.

Do I take Sylvia?

My Pouncer.

She has become a little too independent these days.

Ambitions of her own, perhaps.

Well, let us face her with it.

And if she is civil,

I may, perhaps, after all...

...take her along.

And then, when I have decided about Sylvia...

...one last great wickedness

before I go.

Last great wickedness.

I've got to follow him.

I've got to get out of here anyway.

Come on Box ,.

That's funny. Can't have.

I have.

I've lost it.

Let me out.

Let me out Let me out..

Let me out let me out ,.

Let me out, let me out, let me out.

Let me out, let me out, let me out...

Charles.

Follow me.

There's one thing on my conscience.

You see, Sylvia, my Pouncer,

I told you he was going to double-cross us.

There's the boodle, all packed up in his cashbox.

False-hearted, treacherous Abner

about to flit off and leave me in the lurch.

Well, what!.

Not to put too fine a point on it, Sylvia,

that's exactly what we're doing to him, eh?

It would serve him right

if we just carried off the whole Box.

Too heavy and too conspicuous.

My master key will soon resolve the matter.

We shall conceal the jewels upon our person.

No! Everything together . in our suitcase.

Certainly, my dear. Whatever you say.

But do hurry, Charles. He may be back at any moment.

Oh, the revenge.

For all these years of, "Do this, Charles,"

"Don't be such a fool, Charles,"

"You dolt, Charles."

Is that the last?

No, there's still something.

Oh, it's only a bit of rag.

Bit of jeweller's cleaning rag or some such. There.

Now...away.