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Talk to me, Theresa in Tottenham. Mitch,
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I had a dream last night that my boss was
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ravishing me dressed as Beatrix Potter.
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What do you think it means? Well, Freud
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said all dreams are desires, so I'd say
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you've got some fairly serious therapy
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issues. Line 12, Tim in Earl's Court.
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Talk. I was wondering where you stand on
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necrophilia. If you're so bad at getting
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laid that you have to resort to dead
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people, that speaks volumes about your
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interpersonal skills. Line 12, Carl in
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Stoke Newington. Talk to me, Mitch. I
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think I'm in love with my best friend's
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wife and I don't know what to do about it.
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I'm in the right mess, man. I'm all over
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the place. Well, there's an ointment you
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can get for that, my friend. It's called
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denial. Bury it and forget about her. I
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can't, Mitch. I really can't. Has anything
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happened between you? Sex twice?
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Let me ask you this. If you sleep with
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your best friend's partner and he never
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finds out, did it ever happen?
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I've enjoyed this week. Long time since I
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wore my producer's cap. Been nice having
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you. Well, he's great, but you've got
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better legs. He's back for the awards.
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Due tomorrow night. But hasn't we might
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actually win something? Yeah. Flew back
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tonight. He's a lucky lad, catching one
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like Claire. She's very beautiful. Celtic
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blood, though. Fiery. You won't want to
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pick a fight with her. I don't suppose
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there's any point in inviting you out for
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a drink, is there? Some horrendous media
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joint, Naturally. Perhaps we
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could try somewhere a little quieter.
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You Joking decree absolute. Came through
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last Tuesday.
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A few of my girlfriends threw a divorce
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party. The most fun I've had in seven
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years. Except the affairs. So you're
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back out there, looking around, seeing
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what's on offer? Any man in my life right
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now has four legs and licks his own penis.
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That's quite a talent. My ex had learned
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to do that, it'd have saved a lot of
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problems. What is it women like
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about you, Mitch, in your opinion?
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Confidence? Charisma? Darn. An enormous
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knob, of course. See, you're thinking
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that's a joke, but there's a tiny little
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part of you curious to find out.
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And that's how you get women into bed
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lines like that. I've got better ones.
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I'd hope so.
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More wine?
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Bring love into my life Bring love into my
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life Bring me the man of my dreams. Shut
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up, you Annoying little shit.
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It's.
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Was it as fabulous as it looks? In the
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four Goes to Bed Grande are overlooking
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the sea. We even had our own plunge book.
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I thought you were at it like rabbits with
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the name on. Period.
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Does it feel any different being a
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respectable married woman? We're the same
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people, aren't we, Charlotte? Don't go
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far. Okay.
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Listen, Claire. If I say something, you
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promise it won't go any further? Of
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course, yeah. What is it?
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I'm having an affair.
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No. Who is?
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Easy, easy, Mary. No, it's someone
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from work is a bit younger. It's really
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sexy. I know it's wrong and I'll probably
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end up regretting it. I just can't stop
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myself. It's so long since I felt desired.
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Yeah. He calls me
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beautiful. Oh, God, Kelly.
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I can't believe it. You're of all people.
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No, no. Yeah, boring old Kelly. We can do
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it. I mean, is it serious? I thought you
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were trying for a baby. That's the thing.
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That's what I want. But I want. I want
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love and affection. I want a family. I
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want everything you've got. This cop won't
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give me those things. You don't leave him.
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You have to tell him what you what you
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want. He needs to know how serious this
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is.
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Need any help? No, thanks. I'm looking for
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something quite specific.
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Escort agency.
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Lots of work to do and I've kind of told
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my colleagues I'll be bringing a date
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tonight. So how much are you willing to
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pay? 300. 300? God. I know someone.
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I'll do it for half that. Who?
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Got everything you need? Depends if you've
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left the reoper. I'll raise a glass for
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you, Twilight. You look great.
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Does my bum look big? Claire, you look
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fantastic. Right, you got five minutes and
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Mitch is picking us up on route. Oh,
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can't we just see him there? No, he wants
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to make an entrance. Besides, he's got
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something Birdie wants to show off.
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Ah. Evening, all. How was the honeymoon?
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Fantastic. Hi, Cassie. Woody. Claire. I
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thought you were bringing a date.
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Not for public consumption.
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Park Lane Hotel, please, Captain.
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I better get back. You getting on the
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Piccadilly line? No, I'm getting a taxi.
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All right,
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Face. You look amazing.
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You scrub up all right yourself?
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Why haven't you replied to me? Tim, I've
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been busy. I need to talk to you.
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There's really nothing to say.
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Mitchell.
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Rupert. You still critical? You got a
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proper job.
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Thank you,
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Claire. Mitch,
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come on. I'll see you there. Good night.
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What I never realised is how many crazy
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people there are out there in London? I
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know it's a big city, but it's worse than
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nyc. Why do they all call our show?
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I've got a theory on that. It's community.
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Sure, we get our fair share of our boys
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calling in, but the rest of them, they
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want that most human thing. Contact.
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Seriously, who talks anymore about the
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most important things? Life, love?
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Nobody. So they call me because they know
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I'm there and they know that I genuinely
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care about what they want to say. When do
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you collect your over year? I'll just
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settle for the Best presenter award
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tonight. Thanks, Faith.
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Hi. Do you want a beer? Yeah, lovely.
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That's a new one.
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Scott.
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I want a baby. Oh, Kels.
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It's something I really, really want.
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And if you're not prepared to
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do that with me, then I. I don't think we
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should be together anymore.
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Oh. How do I look? Honest opinion not
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required. You'll do for me. Come on.
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After that,
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I just wanted to say,
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if you want to try for a kid, I'm up for
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it. Yeah?
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You mean it?
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And now, the one you've all been waiting
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for. The nominations for Best Talk radio
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presenter 2007. Robbie Kane,
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Kiss. Mitch Moore,
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Life FM.
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And Liam Connor, LBC.
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The moment of truth. And the winner is.
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Mitch Moore. Anything Goes.
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Well done, mate.
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Well done. Tis of all, both of you.
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Bad leading time. Listen, we don't do this
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for the awards. Everyone knows that
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they're worthless. And to be honest with
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you, I'd much prefer to be in me local
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with a couple of pints and standing up
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here in a penguin win soon.
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Get me out of here, Claire. Away from all
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this nonsense. Let's go
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and do something. Something together.
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Something nice. This means absolutely
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nothing compared to you.
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But you've given it me and so I'm going to
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take it. Thanks very much. I appreciate
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it. And I'll see you same time next year.
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Mitchmore Life F.
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Yeah. Barry, please let
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me be a wonderful.
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Don't stop me.
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What you doing?
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What now?
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Bring. Bring my wife. Your wife?
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If you're not family, Miss, you can't go
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beyond this point. Tommy was single. Is
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that Mrs. Kenton's wife? Yeah.
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You don't know me, but I was having sex
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with your shit of a husband earlier this
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evening when his heart gave way mid flow.
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Probably induced by his excessive cocaine
200
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use. He's been admitted to St. James's
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A&E. I'm so sorry.
202
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What happened to you? What went wrong?
203
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How did you end up like this?
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Come on.
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Congratulations.
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You stood in a room for the people that
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declared. You were saying the same way.
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I'm thinking about you. My walk.
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But you back for the sake of everyone else
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before you warn me. I know all about its
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reputation. There was ladies
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man love him and leave them. I'm sure you
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know what you're doing. To be honest,
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he's not really my type. All that swagger.
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You're fond of him though, I can tell.
216
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How do you mean? Close. He's will. His
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best friend. Yes, he is.
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Excuse me, I got to get back.
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What is? Can we get out here? Go where?
220
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The pub. Some are fun away from all the
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non.
222
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You're not doing that in here. Now piss
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off out. We're married, you know. And you
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should know better.
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Wait.
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Somebody see.
227
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Let's do it later. Well, at home in bed
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like good little people.
15598
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