All language subtitles for gi6-idreamofjeannie-s04e22-1080p_track3_[eng]

[Pal]

Thanks, Jeannie,
I'll be home early.

Oh, master, be careful.

Okay, I’m only gonna go down
to the office.

Oh, yes, master, but next week,
you will be going to the moon,

and | wish to instill in you
a careful attitude.

[CHUCKLES]

Okay, | promise I'll stop
at all the red lights.

Oh, I’m sorry--

[CHUCKLES]

Hey, what’s the big idea?

You just kissed me goodbye
inside.

Did I? | forgot.

Did you?

Well, that’s one thing
about my kisses,

they always leave
a lasting impression.

Get inside. Go on, go on.

[SCOFFS]

Ooh!

Sister, you kissed my master
and made him think it was me.

For the last time, sister,
you leave my master alone.

He belongs to me.

[GASPS]

Do you think | don’t know that?

[SNIFFLING]
Here | am,

madly in love
with my own sister’s master,

knowing | could never have him.

And you begrudge me
one measly little kiss.

[SOBBING]

Oh, there’s no charity
in you, sister.

Oh, | am sorry.
| did not think of it that way.

Oh, that’s all right. Forget it.

Did | hear you say he’s thinking
of going to the moon?

Oh, yes, sister,
and | am so happy for him.

It is the one thing he wants
in this whole world.

Hm. Then he’d be furious

with anyone
who tried to stop him.

Hm?

I’m sorry, sister,
| did not hear you.

| said, | think you should try
to stop him.

Oh, no, sister, | would never
think of doing that.

| want him to do
whatever will make him happy.

[SIGHS]

Well, that’s the difference
between us.

You would let him go
into unchartered space,

facing all sorts
of unknown dangers.

While I,
| would keep him at home.

Safe, protected.

Hm. But, then,
he’s your master.

Do you really think
it is that dangerous?

The first man on the moon?
Are you kidding?

Why, his chances
are only vech in vechnachi

of coming back alive.

[GASPS]

Vech in vechnachi?
Oh, dear.

Well, | wouldn’t want
to try to--

To influence you, sister,

but if | were you,
I'd convince him to stay home.

You are right. | will try.

Oh, and, sis, | wouldn’t mention
that you talked to me.

Well, you know
how he feels about me.

He's liable
to misunderstand my motives.

Oh, | understand.
| will not say anything.

And | forgive you
for kissing him.

| had better go. Goodbye.

Hmm.

Oh, dear.

Once a sucker, always a sucker.

[Pal]

[Pal]

[Pal]

TONY:
Now, gentlemen,
if you'll notice on the left

is the crater Langrenus.

The landing site section
has discarded that

because of its depth.

And the same goes
for the, uh, crater Copernicus.

Uh, that leaves us
with the choice of three:

the Sea of Storms,
the Sea of Showers

or the Sea of Tranquility.

Excuse me, just a moment.

[QUIETLY]
Go home. Go home.

Major Nelson, whatever it is,
can't it wait?

lll have to consider this
later, miss. Uh, please, later.

Please, master, it is urgent.
Later.

SCHAEFFER:
Major Nelson.

[GRUMBLES]

Ahem. This one’s mine.
Uh, I’m Major Healey.

Would you like to tell me your
troubles and telephone number?

Hm?
Oh, J--

Would you get out of here?

But-- But--

| have to talk to him.
Out. Out.

What was that last name?

Uh, Miss-- Miss--
Miss Waff.

Proceed, major.

TONY:
Yes, sir, of course.

As | was saying,
we have a choice

between Storms, Showers
and Tranquility.

[CHUCKLES]

Yes.
Since our lowest orbital point

will be over the crater Tycho,

uh, the best landing site
would seem to be, um,

"Do not go to the moon.
It is too dangerous."

What was that, major?

He said, "Do not go to the moon.
It’s too dangerous."

Could you speak up a little,
Tony? Can't hear you.

That’s what | heard, major.

No, sir, | believe you
understood me

to say Tycho is too dangerous.

Oh.

Could’ve fooled me.

It did not work, sister.

He was showing movies
of the moon,

and | could not even talk
to him.

Oh. That poor,
brave fool.

He doesn't realize
what dangers there are.

Listen to this,
listen to this:

"The moon-bound astronauts
can expect searing heat,

sub-zero cold,
dust craters miles deep."

Oh, that is terrible.

Well, | will talk to him again
when he gets home.

Hm.

I’m beginning to wonder
how much you love him, sis.

If it were me,
| wouldn’t waste a minute.

But | cannot see him now,

he is with Dr. Bellows
and a general.

Sis, what’s more important?

Embarrassing him a little
or saving his life’?

What do you think | should do?

Just leave it up to me, darling.

You're long on devotion,
but short on ingenuity.

No.

[CHUCKLES]

| am sorry, sister,

but | still do not trust you
alone with my master.

[SCOFFS]

What "alone"?

You just said he’s with
Dr. Bellows and a general.

Well, that is true.

What are you going to do?

Mm. | just want to show him

how dangerous the moon
really is.

May | borrow
your little soldier suit?

What?
Hm-hm.

Oh. Oh, certainly.

[LAUGHS]

So the consensus
from all sections

seems to point
at the Sea of Tranquility.

Specifically this little
declivity here,

which you'll be able
to see more clearly

on the blown-up stills.
[MAGIC BOINGS]

[ROARS]

[YELLS]

Major Nelson,
what’s the matter with you?

"What's the matter with--?"
Couldn't you see?

[TONY WHIMPERS]

It was nothing, sir, | thought
| saw something peculiar

in the Sea of Tranquility.

And it made you yell?

Doctor, is he in shape
to make this flight?

I’m beginning to wonder
about that myself.

Can we continue this
this afternoon?

| have a little business
I’d like to attend to.

You certainly do, major,
in my Office.

I’m booked up solid
this afternoon.

We'll have to finish now.
That is, if you can continue

without going into a fit.

TONY:
Well, as | was saying, um,

this little-- | think you'll
notice this little declivity

on the edge of the Sea
of Tranquility.

[MAGIC BOINGS]

[WHISTLE TOOTING]

[YELLS]

What is it this time, major?
Something else peculiar?

SCHAEFFER:
He’s going to pieces.

Well, proceed, major.

I’m-- I’m all right, sir.

The Sea of Tranquility is
definitely the landing site!

Wait a minute, you don’t have
to yell, we can hear you. Boy...

Was | shouting?! Sorry!

You're still shouting.

Sorry!

[TRAIN RUMBLING]

Precisely 0600 on the third day,

the landing module will descend

into a 50-yard target perimeter!

Doctor,
will you look at that?

| can't.

The sight of a fine specimen
like Major Nelson

cracking up before my very eyes
is more than | can bear.

On the northeast edge
of The Sea of Tranquility--

This is the good part.

| don’t know what Jeannie’s
trying to do

but | gotta stop her before
Dr. Bellows is convinced

I’m completely off my rocker.

ROGER:
Yeah, you're supposed to be
in his office right now.

TONY:
Yeah.

Oh, no you don’t, major, baby.

I’m not through helping you yet.

TONY:
Hello?

[NEW YORK ACCENT]
| am sorry, we are unable
to complete your call.

Please deposit 15 cents
for the first three minutes.

Oh, yes, just a moment.

Roger, give me 15 cents.

What do you 15 cents for?
Just give me 15 cents.

Miss, this is not a payphone.

Then kindly move to a payphone
and deposit 15 cents

for the first three minutes.

No, you don’t understand.

You must've made a mistake.
This is not a payphone.

Now, would you put
my call through, please?

| am sorry, we are not
allowed to engage

in personal arguments
with the customers.

This is a recording.

Yeah, but wait a minute,
wait a minute.

| just had a fight
with a recording.

Fifteen cents, huh.

Major Nelson.

TONY:
Yes?

BELLOWS:
| asked you to go to my office

from the screening room.

Take it easy, Sir,
he’s feeling a little shaky.

| am not feeling--
I’m not feeling shaky.

| just dropped by my office
to pick up papers before--

Well, of course
you’re not feeling shaky.

Of course not.
Now, come along,

we're gonna have
a little examination

and it'll be over
just like that.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

What’s the matter, major?

Huh? Oh, the--

The thunder startled me, sir.
You hear the thunder, Roge?

No, I’m still working out
the 15 cents for the phone call.

Thunder?

[MAGIC BOINGS]

[GUNSHOTS]

Well, there’s not a cloud
in the sky.

[GUNSHOTS]

[GASPING]

What’s the matter?
Did you hear it again?

Uh, no, no, I’m fine.
I’m fine, sir.

TONY:
Just fine. Everything’s fine.

BELLOWS:
Oh. Well, just relax.

He’s feeling better already.
Better, major? He’s a wreck.

| never saw a man
go to pieces so quickly,

and it happened like--
Don't, don’t, don't.

What’s wrong? He was just gonna
snap his fingers like this.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

Oh! Here, here.

Well, the diagnosis
is just a clear case

of nervous disintegration.

What’s the matter?
Excuse me, but I’m sorry,

ll have to inform
General Schaeffer.

Well, they won't put you through
unless you have 15 cents.

What?
Fifteen cents.

Oh, don't be ridiculous.

ROGER:
What’s the matter with me
anyhow?

General? Oh, it--

It pains me to say this
but, uh, I’m afraid

we'll have to replace
Major Nelson on the moon shot.

Sir, if you just give me
a couple hours sleep,

| could go home, I'd feel fine
in the morning, really, | would.

Yes, general.

[GONG RESONATING]

[Pal]

ROGER:
Oh. Wait. Wait.

Tell me what to do.
Easy.

No, no, no, easy. Easy.

My master is really
not going to the moon?

[CHUCKLES]
The way he’s been acting,
darling,

not a chance.

| hope we are doing
the right thing.

Oh, don’t bother to thank me,
darling,

it was a labor of love.

Oh, but | do appreciate
your help.

My goodness, | never would've
had the courage to do it myself.

Just remember, darling,
no matter what he says,

it’s for his own good.

[DOOR OPENING]
Oh. There he is.

Oh, dear,
| hope he is not too angry.

Well, uh, don’t tell him
| had anything to do with it.

| don’t want any credit.

But he should know
what a favor you have done him.

No! No, no,
you see, darling, I’m--

I’m not even supposed
to be here.

My goodness,
if my real master found out,

he’d kill me.

Oh. And you came here
just to help me.

You know, sister,
| never realized

what a really good friend
you are.

Yes,

well, goodbye, sucker.

| mean-- Sister. Sister.

[Pal]

It is for your own good.
It is for your own good.

Oh, thanks, thanks a lot.

But It is for your own good.
I’m not going to the moon.

They've replaced me.

Yes, master, for your own good.

TONY:
The General thinks
I’m a ding-a-ling.

They might put me
in the statistics section.

Yes, master, for your own good.
Don’t say that again!

Sorry, this time
you’ve gone too far.

It’s over, finished.

Ha-ha.
That's it, baby,

victory.

How could you do this to me?

Ever since | got
in the Air Force,

I've been dreaming
of making a moon shot and why--

But, master,
it was for your own--

Don't you ever say that again.
Not ever. Ever.

Well, it is too dangerous.

You're protecting me now.
Okay.

Do not thank me, master,
it was a labor of love.

Huh? Well, | appreciate
your concern, but understand

that | can’t go on
with this anymore.

Oh, no, master,
you must understand.

If you land on the moon,
you must expect searing heat,

freezing cold, dust craters--

Jeannie, please.

Your chances of coming back
alive

are only vech in vechnachi.

Vech and vechnachi?

That is Persian
for one in a 1000.

Jeannie, don’t you understand?

Everything you’re thinking of,
all the dangers and everything,

that NASA has taken these
into account.

Oh, yes, master, but they’re
only mortals, | am--

It's called "technology."
Technology.

Technology?
Mm-hm.

Is that a new kind of magic?

[CHUCKLES]

Jeannie, will you help me?

Please?
Well, | do not know.

Please? Please, help me.

May | blink you an extra pair
of long underwear?

[CHUCKLES]
Yeah, two if you want.

And will you promise not to step
in any dust craters?

| promise, cross my heart.

All right, | will help you.

Good. Let’s go.

Can you get everything straight?

Oh, yes, master.
Everything's under control.

lll be with you later,
sergeant,

| have this experiment
to do.

Now, were you ready, major?

Yes, Sir, quite ready.
Good.

All right.

Here we go.

[EXPLOSIONS, GUNSHOTS
ON RECORD PLAYER]

[TRAIN WHEELS CLANKING
ON RECORD PLAYER]

Extraordinary.

Absolutely extraordinary.

Why, it’s the most remarkable
recovery I've ever seen.

You've been sitting there
for two hours.

Well, you must have nerves
of steel, major.

Hello, Dr. Bellows,
are you listening to records?

Records? Don't be ridiculous.
Here, you've got to hear this.

You've got to hear
this experiment. Wait a minute.

Alrighty.
Now, listen intently.

[EXPLOSIONS, LOUD CLANKING
ON RECORD PLAYER]

[SCREAMS]

Major.

Major. Major, | want you to go
and get General Schaeffer.

| want him to hear this.

Major Healey.
[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

Oh, never mind.

[LAUGHING]

Oh!

You were wonderful, master.

[LAUGHING]
| was, wasn’t |?

[SIGHS]
Well.

It’s a little dumpy.

Like my sister.

Well, now that I’m finally
rid of her,

| can fix this place up.

Ah!

Whoa. Ha-ha!

Oh, hello, sister.

Uh,

what is this doing here?

[LAUGHS]

A little present.
What are you doing here?

Why should | not be here?
This is my home.

Oh, yes, yes, but--
But didn’t he throw you out

when you had him replaced
on the moon flight?

Oh, that.

[CHUCKLES]
Well, he was not replaced
after all.

You see, my master
explained to me

that NASA has a new kind
of magic

that takes care of all
the dangers in outer space

Ha.

A new kind of magic.

Hm.

It is called technology.

Oh, brother.

And so you fixed everything up?

Yes, and my master
is leaving in two days.

Is that not wonderful?

Oh, scrumptious.

Well, | better be going.
| have my work cut out for me.

Oh, sister, why do you not stay
for a few days?

Oh, no, sis, thank you,
| don’t want to put you out.

You would not
be putting me out.

Oh, yes, | will.

Ta-ta.

What'd she mean by that?

Yes, I'll have that information
for you immediately.

Well, gentlemen,
there’s one new detail.

That was the propulsion section.

There’s been a change

in the weight displacement ratio
in the capsule.

Instead of the usual 50 pounds
leeway, we now have 20.

Well, there goes
my lucky paperweight.

They want our last-minute
weight figures.

TONY:
Well, that shouldn't be
any problem.

| don’t think we could've
gained weight this last week.

Well, speak for yourself,
| had a pretty big breakfast.

Well, gentlemen, shall we go?

Yes, Sir.

[Pal]

A hundred and--
Wait. Hold it, sir.

Here, take this.

A hundred and seventy-five.

Right on the nose.
Yes, right on the nose,

a hundred and seventy-five,
no change there.

Uh, Major Nelson?
Yes.

Last chance, baby,
better make it good.

Ooh.

It'll be a hundred and
eighty-one and a quarter, sir.

Oops. Excuse me.

Yeah. Uh--

Major Nelson.
Yes, I’m sorry.

If you fidget, the scale
won't register properly.

Yes.

A hundred and ninety.

BELLOWS:
Oh, Major, you gained 10 pounds
since the last weigh-in.

| couldn’t weigh 190, sir.
The scale must be broken.

No, it’s not,
it worked perfect for me.

Roger.

Well, even if it’s correct,
the situation isn’t critical.

You still have 10 pounds leeway.

Oh, good.

Let me see if it’s broken.

Roge, it’s all right.

On second though,
major, let’s try it again.

Yes, let’s try it.

[MAGIC BOINGS]

Two hundred and five?

Why, Major,
you re over the limit.

Well, if | gained 20 pounds,
obviously, it would show,

wouldn't it, sir?

Well, that’s true.

Could | get weighed
on another scale?

Yes, in my office.

Come along as Soon as you Can.

Yes, sir.
Better lay off the sweets.

Two hundred and five pounds.
Shame, shame, shame.

How much do you weigh,
Dr. Bellows?

Uh, what?

No matter which scale you use,
it will register the same.

What do you think you’re doing?
| thought | explained it to you.

Well, | have changed my mind.

It is much too dangerous
for you.

| will not let you go.

Look, | don’t have time
to go into this.

I’m your master and | order you
to undo whatever you've done.

Oh, please do not order me.

Well, I’m your master
and | order you now. Now.

Oh, | wish | were not
such an obedient genie.

Oh, brother.

Here, take this, and it will put
your weight back to normal.

Are you sure?

Mm-hm.

[Pal]

[GAGGING]

What’ve you done to me?
I’m enormous.

| am sorry, master,
but it is for your own good.

Now, wait a minute.
You will thank me

when it is all over.
ll thank you?

Yeah, I'll thank you.

Jeannie, please be nice.

[GIGGLING]

| can’t understand
what’s taking him so long.

He’s the one who insisted
the scale was wrong.

Well, he always was
a slow dresser.

Major Nelson!
[PANTING]

What happened?

You really put on a few.

Yeah. Well, sir,

something weird happened
with my m-- Metabolic rate.

Just give me a little time
in the lab. A couple of hours.

Couple of hours?

Why, it'll take you at least
a year to get back to normal.

May | sit down, please, sir?
If you can.

Come over here. Here.

Thank you.
Sit. Yeah.

Well, I--

Oh, no! Ohl!

Easy, now.
Easy.

Get him up. Major Healey,
can’t you try?

Oh, he’s heavy,
heavy, heavy.

Hey, haven't you ever heard
about the Air Force Diet?

There’s no question of you
going on the moon shot.

The capsule would never
get off the ground.

Sir, this is just temporary.
If you give me a little time--

Back into the examination room
and stay there, major.

General Schaeffer
will want to see this.

Oh.
Jeannie’s done it this time.

She’s done it this time.
I’m finished, I’m washed up.

Whoa!
[WOMAN SCREAMING]

Oh.

[Pal]

Examination room’s over here,
Tony.

Whoa, it’s-- It’s.

Whoa.

Well, it’s shocking,
Major Nelson,

absolutely shocking.

| mean,
| Knew my sister was dumb,

but | had no idea
she was that dumb.

| put up with this
for a long time,

but this time, we’ve had it.

I’m through.

Through, absolutely through.

Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.
Poor sis.

But | can’t say | blame you.

Say, if you’re in the market
for a master,

maybe we could work
a little something out, huh?

Mm. | thought you'd never ask.
Kiss me.

Uh, w-- No, not now.

Would you blink me skinny?

| can’t go around kissing you
like this.

You've got a point.

Oh, that’s better.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Mm.

[SNAPPING FINGERS]

Got ya!
Oh!

What is--?

[MAGIC BOINGS]

No, her eyes, you idiot!

Get her in the closet.

| don’t want to go in with her.
[SCREAMING]

You won't believe it, sir,

but he must weight
at least 300 pounds.

What happened to the door?

That's what I’ve been trying
to tell you, general.

He couldn't get through it.

Oh, hello, sir.

Who weighs 300 pounds?

Major Nelson, you're--
You're skinny.

Oh, well,
thank you very much, sir.

Perhaps | should go
on a weight-gaining diet?

Don't be ridiculous,
not 10 minutes ago,

you were gargantuan.

Dr. Bellows.
Well, he was, sir.

The first time
he stepped on the scale,

he was 10 pounds overweight.

And the next time
he stepped on the scale,

he was 20 pounds overweight.

What scale is that, sir?

Why, the scale right...

Dr. Bellows, | think you and |
had better have a little talk.

Oh, not with me,
with him, sir.

He’s the one who's gaining
and losing hundreds of pounds.

First you tell me
that Major Nelson

has had a complete
nervous collapse.

Then you tell me he’s made
a remarkable recovery.

Then you tell me
that he weighs 300 pounds!

And now | find him looking
exactly like he always does.

What exactly have you
against Major Nelson, doctor?

BELLOWS:
Nothing, General Schaeffer.

It’s only that I’m trying...

Come on out, Roge. Come on.

[YELLS]

[CRASHING]

Roger.

Shh.

[Pal]