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♪ The Simpsons ♪
2
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[belches]
3
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D'oh!
4
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[dogs barking]
5
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D'oh!
6
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{\an8}[beeping]
7
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{\an8}♪ Bowl me to the moon ♪
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{\an8}♪ And roll me to the stars ♪
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{\an8}Hey!
10
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{\an8}♪ This is more than just a game
For big fat dopes in bars ♪
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{\an8}♪ No, for lazy guys this is a sport ♪
12
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{\an8}[scatting]
13
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{\an8}It's today.
14
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{\an8}It's today!
15
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{\an8}What day is it?
16
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{\an8}Saturday.
17
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{\an8}It's today!
18
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{\an8}Oh!
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{\an8}[gulps] Whoopee.
20
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{\an8}Move over, Los Angeles and Philadelphia.
21
00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:09,902
{\an8}It's Springfield's turn
22
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:14,865
{\an8}to have its drunken sports fans
climb streetlights and burn down the town.
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{\an8}That's right. Finally, after years
of phantom fouls and butt fumbles,
24
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{\an8}one of our beloved local sports teams,
the Pin Pals,
25
00:01:23,124 --> 00:01:25,209
{\an8}have made it to the state championship.
26
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{\an8}With Springfield's years of failure
at sports, the arts,
27
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{\an8}and our disastrous
toddler boxing tournament,
28
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{\an8}it's no exaggeration to say
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{\an8}that our super bowlers
are garnering tremendous "pin-terest."
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{\an8}[chuckles]
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[♪ rock plays]
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[crowd] Yeah!
33
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{\an8}Yeah!
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{\an8}Finally, strikes I can support.
35
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Mayor, you've been accused
of being a fair-weather fan for this team.
36
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Not true.
I am a dyed-in-the-wool fan of these...
37
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Bowlers.
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[screams] Bowlers?
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Really? People still do that?
40
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So you don't mind that they say
you're jumping on the bandwagon?
41
00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:08,001
Let me just say no one jumps later
or harder than I.
42
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To the "Pin Heads"... [mumbles]
43
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Pin Pals.
44
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[♪ "He's a Jolly Good Fellow" playing]
45
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[presenter]
And now, your heroes, the Pin Pals.
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[cheering]
47
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[chuckles] How ya doin'?
48
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Marry me!
49
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Oh, yeah. Sure, sure.
50
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Anyhoo, I could never have made it
without my very good friends,
51
00:02:30,775 --> 00:02:33,026
Homer, Carl, Flanders,
52
00:02:33,027 --> 00:02:36,906
and that new guy from Portugal
whose name I forget.
53
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[in Portuguese]
I SEE THIS MATCH AS A STRUGGLE
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FOR THE GREATER GLORY OF ALL.
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[whooping]
56
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[cheering]
57
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Yeah, he don't speak
the good English or nothing,
58
00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:51,420
but he sure as hell can roll strikes.
59
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And he's got a very hot sister,
or girlfriend or mother.
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It's really hard to tell.
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[speaking Portuguese]
62
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All right, based on my experience,
that is not his mother.
63
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Ah, I just want to say
we aren't just doing this for us.
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It is going to mean the world
to this entire town!
65
00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:15,485
Excuse me, but I don't see
how the town possibly benefits from this.
66
00:03:15,486 --> 00:03:19,156
We'd be helped a lot more
by a traffic light on Elm Street.
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Boo!
68
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Smack him with his bone! Smack him good!
69
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Ah, my friends and neighbors...
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Reluctant neighbors.
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00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:32,336
Ah. The... I'd just like us
to bow our heads and thank--
72
00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:34,963
Stupid Flanders
turns everything good into church.
73
00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:37,591
Just once, can you not mention God?
74
00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:42,012
All righty then, let me just say
way to go, big guy in the sky!
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And his son Jesus Christ. Amen.
76
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Jesus is God's rod.
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[chuckles]
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Jesus is God's rod.
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[chuckles] Blasphemy.
80
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And now, "O Captain, my Captain,"
Homer Simpson.
81
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[cheering]
82
00:03:59,781 --> 00:04:05,244
There's one word that defines this team,
and that word isn't "can" or "might."
83
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,913
That word is... Um...
84
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:10,832
Wait a minute. Cards out of order.
85
00:04:10,833 --> 00:04:12,502
Can't read my own writing here.
86
00:04:13,127 --> 00:04:17,423
Oh. Okay. It's "will." Yes, we will!
87
00:04:19,384 --> 00:04:21,468
Let's go, Pin Pals!
88
00:04:21,469 --> 00:04:25,515
Win that title!
89
00:04:26,182 --> 00:04:30,353
Let's get pickles!
90
00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:32,729
All right, folks, break it up.
91
00:04:32,730 --> 00:04:34,899
Unless you're jerkin' a gherkin,
go on home.
92
00:04:37,986 --> 00:04:42,864
[grunts] Oh, Homie, today was magnificent.
93
00:04:42,865 --> 00:04:45,158
I always thought bowling
was just an excuse
94
00:04:45,159 --> 00:04:48,036
to get away from the kids
and drink a lot of beer.
95
00:04:48,037 --> 00:04:50,539
What? No, never.
96
00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:51,623
What?
97
00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:54,293
But now it's made
the whole town proud of you,
98
00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:56,253
and I'm part of the town.
99
00:04:56,254 --> 00:04:58,922
So this comes from the heart. Ugh.
100
00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:00,966
I can't say it. I don't wanna say it.
101
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:04,011
You can't make me say it.
And I won't say it or even think it!
102
00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:05,430
Oh. Thank you, Son.
103
00:05:06,347 --> 00:05:08,974
I love you all. Water my plants.
104
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You don't have any plants.
105
00:05:10,768 --> 00:05:12,020
Then we're good. Bye.
106
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,826
Ah, ain't this the life?
107
00:05:27,827 --> 00:05:31,955
{\an8}Whirlybirdin', full can of soda,
two bags of peanuts.
108
00:05:31,956 --> 00:05:33,373
{\an8}I never known such luxury.
109
00:05:33,374 --> 00:05:35,542
{\an8}I could die right now a happy man.
110
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{\an8}[pilot] This is your captain speaking.
111
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Please buckle up as we attempt
to clear the treacherous mountain peak.
112
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[screams]
113
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No worries,
every chopper in town takes this route.
114
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[alarm buzzing]
115
00:05:55,063 --> 00:05:57,606
Overweight? How is that possible?
116
00:05:57,607 --> 00:06:01,610
"Pilot, five passengers,
five 14-pound balls."
117
00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:06,448
Uh, I wanted a little extra oomph,
so I actually brought a 16-pound ball.
118
00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:10,577
Me too. By which I mean
I brought two 16-pound balls.
119
00:06:10,578 --> 00:06:12,913
Anyone else wanna brag about their balls?
120
00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:14,206
I mean, seriously.
121
00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:18,795
Fausto bring this for good luck. [whoops]
122
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[alarm buzzing]
123
00:06:21,464 --> 00:06:24,132
I'm gonna have
to put her down on the mountain.
124
00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:26,094
Of all the times to be sober.
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[whimpering]
126
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This could be it.
127
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At least I can say goodbye.
128
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- [Marge] Hello.
- Marge.
129
00:06:37,271 --> 00:06:40,482
[Marge] We're not home now,
so please don't rob us.
130
00:06:40,483 --> 00:06:41,608
Leave a message.
131
00:06:41,609 --> 00:06:43,610
[sobs] Listen, Marge.
132
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We've had our arguments,
we've had our things.
133
00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:49,366
But thank God I have the time
to tell you how I really feel.
134
00:06:49,367 --> 00:06:51,368
- [automated voice] Mailbox full.
- D'oh!
135
00:06:51,369 --> 00:06:54,704
[alarm buzzing]
136
00:06:54,705 --> 00:06:55,790
[alarm blaring]
137
00:07:02,463 --> 00:07:04,549
Whee! [groans]
138
00:07:09,512 --> 00:07:12,013
As your captain, one thing is clear:
139
00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:13,682
we must get off this mountain.
140
00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:17,937
And I'm no expert on mountains,
but I say down is this way.
141
00:07:20,314 --> 00:07:21,566
D'oh!
142
00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:26,279
D'oh.
143
00:07:30,199 --> 00:07:31,491
What the...
144
00:07:31,492 --> 00:07:33,201
[Carl] I wouldn't leave just yet, Homer.
145
00:07:33,202 --> 00:07:35,829
Our new friend there
still hasn't woken up.
146
00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:38,206
Oh, God. Spanish-what's-his-name.
147
00:07:38,207 --> 00:07:40,877
It's Portuguese-what's-his-name,
you idiot.
148
00:07:41,919 --> 00:07:43,879
Chief, is there any word?
149
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:45,172
Afraid not.
150
00:07:45,173 --> 00:07:48,884
Apparently they knocked out
a cell phone tower on the way down.
151
00:07:48,885 --> 00:07:49,843
Wait, wait.
152
00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:52,763
Ah. Now we're getting somewhere. Yeah.
153
00:07:53,264 --> 00:07:54,139
[door opens]
154
00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:57,142
Oh, thank God, man.
I was starting to lose all hope.
155
00:07:57,143 --> 00:08:00,896
[in Italian accent] Oh, you hungry cops
put my kids through college.
156
00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:01,980
Seven sisters.
157
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:05,192
Not the women's colleges.
I have seven daughters.
158
00:08:05,193 --> 00:08:09,446
Gia, Mia, Pia, Bia, Zia, Iphigenia,
159
00:08:09,447 --> 00:08:12,283
and then Emily for some reason,
I don't know.
160
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:16,203
[Ned] Mmm. Still barely breathing.
161
00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:21,416
[sighs] If the Lord could carry his cross,
I can carry this poor soul.
162
00:08:21,417 --> 00:08:23,293
[Homer gasps] Well, look at that.
163
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:26,880
Flanders risking his own life
to save another.
164
00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:27,965
Wow.
165
00:08:28,549 --> 00:08:30,300
Homer, can you get my water bottle?
166
00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:31,636
No.
167
00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:35,223
[phone ringing]
168
00:08:35,973 --> 00:08:38,308
A phone! Someone's got cell service.
169
00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:39,809
Hello, Moe speaking.
170
00:08:39,810 --> 00:08:43,230
Hi. I'm looking for a Mr. Simpson.
First name, Homer.
171
00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:44,773
Oh, I recognize that voice.
172
00:08:44,774 --> 00:08:46,775
You ever call me again, you little puke,
173
00:08:46,776 --> 00:08:50,237
I'm gonna cut you up,
use your intestines as violin strings
174
00:08:50,238 --> 00:08:51,947
and play Flight of the Bumblebee.
175
00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:54,407
I'm gonna go Rimsky-Korsakov on youse.
176
00:08:54,408 --> 00:08:56,743
I'm just trying to find my dad.
177
00:08:56,744 --> 00:08:59,454
Yeah, right.
Try looking in hell, hell boy.
178
00:08:59,455 --> 00:09:00,872
[Bart] ¡Ay, caramba!
179
00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:05,001
Moe, you idiot! You were
the only one with cellular service!
180
00:09:05,002 --> 00:09:06,836
[grunts] What have I done?
181
00:09:06,837 --> 00:09:08,421
Oh, me and my anger issues!
182
00:09:08,422 --> 00:09:12,300
Dr. Rubenstein's gonna be so disappointed!
[grunting]
183
00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:13,802
[rumbling]
184
00:09:13,803 --> 00:09:15,428
[mutters] Stupid avalanche.
185
00:09:15,429 --> 00:09:17,139
[beeps, line ringing]
186
00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:25,146
No connection. And it's almost night.
187
00:09:25,147 --> 00:09:28,275
[sobs] I feel so much regret.
188
00:09:28,276 --> 00:09:32,070
I never got the chance
to tell my son I loved him.
189
00:09:32,071 --> 00:09:34,906
Never? You're 87 years old.
190
00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:37,075
Oh, it's on my to-do list.
191
00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:39,287
Take a look. See?
192
00:09:39,954 --> 00:09:41,414
[strains]
193
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:46,710
{\an8}Still no sign of the missing bowlers.
194
00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:48,461
And one thing I must say now,
195
00:09:48,462 --> 00:09:51,673
there is nothing a newscaster loves
better than missing people,
196
00:09:51,674 --> 00:09:56,428
be they on a mountain, in a submarine,
or preferably deep under rubble.
197
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:57,762
Even if we know they're dead,
198
00:09:57,763 --> 00:10:01,808
we'll keep it quiet for a few days
just to keep the ratings up.
199
00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:05,771
{\an8}And now tonight's lotto,
which no one ever wins. [chuckles]
200
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,648
No! [echoing]
201
00:10:08,649 --> 00:10:11,443
Why am I talking like this? [echoing]
202
00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:15,531
I'm not falling,
just clinging to the edge. [echoing]
203
00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:18,241
Oh, man, that was close.
204
00:10:18,242 --> 00:10:19,618
How deep is that thing anyway?
205
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,829
Only one way to find out.
206
00:10:25,833 --> 00:10:27,042
[bowling pins clatter]
207
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:30,337
Gentleman,
I fear we're starting to hallucinate.
208
00:10:30,338 --> 00:10:32,005
That's crazy talk.
209
00:10:32,006 --> 00:10:33,299
Barney, pick up the spare.
210
00:10:36,886 --> 00:10:37,887
[bowling pin clatters]
211
00:10:39,555 --> 00:10:40,555
Listen to me.
212
00:10:40,556 --> 00:10:42,849
Time to get your cuckoos
back in your clocks.
213
00:10:42,850 --> 00:10:44,976
We're approaching the point of no return.
214
00:10:44,977 --> 00:10:47,312
Flanders, how do I put this?
215
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,189
I was thinking I might wanna...
216
00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:51,399
Oh, this is so embarrassing...
217
00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:52,317
Pray.
218
00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:55,904
There are no atheists in foxholes.
219
00:10:55,905 --> 00:10:58,198
Oh, yes. Foxes are very religious.
220
00:10:58,199 --> 00:10:59,282
I'd be praying
221
00:10:59,283 --> 00:11:02,327
if a bunch of guys in red vests on horses
were trying to kill me.
222
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,080
Now, make with the "Our Father."
223
00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:09,125
[presenter]
Still no word on the Springfield team.
224
00:11:09,126 --> 00:11:12,755
Please observe an anticipatory
60-second moment of silence.
225
00:11:16,550 --> 00:11:17,760
[bowler] Wasn't me!
226
00:11:19,470 --> 00:11:20,471
Strike.
227
00:11:22,306 --> 00:11:25,350
My friends,
if we just have faith in the good Lord
228
00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:28,813
who blew us to bits on the side
of the mountain, we'll be okay.
229
00:11:29,313 --> 00:11:31,482
Hey, Churchy Joe, tell that to my piggies.
230
00:11:31,982 --> 00:11:36,069
The word "frostbite" sounds so cutesy
when people get it at Buffalo Bills games,
231
00:11:36,070 --> 00:11:38,405
but when it happens to you... [grunts]
232
00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:41,825
Well, I think things will be just fine.
233
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:44,703
Really? And who made you "Optimist Prime"?
234
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:48,206
I broke open my first aid kit.
235
00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:49,124
[all gasp]
236
00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:51,084
Anybody else holding out on anything?
237
00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:53,002
Like me with these two bags of peanuts,
238
00:11:53,003 --> 00:11:56,716
which I'm gonna eat right now
despite my peanut allergy.
239
00:11:58,384 --> 00:11:59,885
[swallows, gulps]
240
00:12:01,512 --> 00:12:05,224
See this? This is the face of a survivor.
[chuckles]
241
00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:08,435
Uh, Christmas decorations?
242
00:12:08,436 --> 00:12:10,270
Uh, in October?
243
00:12:10,271 --> 00:12:13,022
We've done everything we can
to help your father,
244
00:12:13,023 --> 00:12:17,611
so I thought this would help us
feel better. [sobs]
245
00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:23,409
Bart, they say a kid is only as happy
as their saddest parent.
246
00:12:29,874 --> 00:12:32,959
Zoom in on the heartbroken family.
Zoom, I say.
247
00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:36,963
No, I can't. I didn't go
to journalism school to be a ghoul.
248
00:12:36,964 --> 00:12:39,007
I went because it was an easy major.
249
00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:42,803
Take your soul
and get the hell out of local news.
250
00:12:44,138 --> 00:12:46,347
Fausto not good.
251
00:12:46,348 --> 00:12:48,600
My friend, we will get you back,
252
00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:51,895
and then you and I will have
a grand old time.
253
00:12:51,896 --> 00:12:54,481
- I hear you silently agreeing.
- [mutters]
254
00:12:54,482 --> 00:12:58,318
We'll go fishing and make s'mores
and we'll be best friends.
255
00:12:58,319 --> 00:13:02,614
You're a Catholic and I'm a Christian,
but we'll work through that. Oh.
256
00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:04,073
More silent agreement.
257
00:13:04,074 --> 00:13:07,661
Here, my friend, let me set you down
so we can talk about our great future.
258
00:13:08,662 --> 00:13:11,623
Save your breath, pal. He's dead.
259
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:14,584
No. No, he's not dead. He's just resting.
260
00:13:14,585 --> 00:13:16,836
Oh, Lord, you can't be this cruel.
261
00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:17,921
Sorry, man.
262
00:13:17,922 --> 00:13:22,175
I knew he was a goner a while ago,
but I liked watching you carry him.
263
00:13:22,176 --> 00:13:23,718
We were gonna make s'mores.
264
00:13:23,719 --> 00:13:26,096
Now they'll just be "s'nothing."
265
00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:29,057
Poor Fausto. Poor Flanders.
266
00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:30,850
You really tried, man.
267
00:13:30,851 --> 00:13:32,519
Aw, I mean it.
268
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,604
I'm not just hugging you
because you're warm,
269
00:13:34,605 --> 00:13:36,189
although that's a big part of it.
270
00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:37,607
You're a good man.
271
00:13:37,608 --> 00:13:39,567
Homer, I knew you had a heart.
272
00:13:39,568 --> 00:13:41,861
Just like the Cowardly Lion.
273
00:13:41,862 --> 00:13:45,365
He always had a heart.
What he lacked was courage.
274
00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:47,909
And the Scarecrow lacked straw, right?
275
00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:49,410
He was nothing but straw.
276
00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:53,122
Wow. I'm looking at everything
with new eyes,
277
00:13:53,123 --> 00:13:54,791
just like the Tin Man.
278
00:13:54,792 --> 00:13:56,377
That's not what the Tin Ma...
279
00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:58,587
Look, just give me another hug.
280
00:14:00,506 --> 00:14:03,216
All right, gentleman.
There's a subject we need to discuss.
281
00:14:03,217 --> 00:14:06,261
Now, we've waited long enough.
I'm just gonna say it.
282
00:14:06,262 --> 00:14:09,848
It is time that we resorted
to cannibalism. Mmm.
283
00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:12,100
What? No, absolutely not.
284
00:14:12,101 --> 00:14:14,060
I'm not saying we eat him.
285
00:14:14,061 --> 00:14:16,563
I'm saying we prepare him to be eaten.
286
00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:20,692
{\an8}If he gets frozen, we'll just end up with
junk food, like his hair or his toenails.
287
00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:21,776
What?
288
00:14:21,777 --> 00:14:23,028
Stop, stop, stop.
289
00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:25,530
[clucking]
290
00:14:25,531 --> 00:14:28,283
Just give me a wing. Come on.
You got two, come on.
291
00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:30,202
No eating people.
292
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:41,254
[Ned] If I eat these and don't share them,
it breaks every value I have.
293
00:14:41,255 --> 00:14:44,632
But just thinking about it
also means I've sinned. [sighs]
294
00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:48,428
I must say, it's a lot easier to have
this debate with my mouth full of matzo.
295
00:14:48,429 --> 00:14:50,305
- Flanders?
- [gulps]
296
00:14:50,306 --> 00:14:52,682
- Yes?
- It's so clear to me now.
297
00:14:52,683 --> 00:14:54,309
You're the better man, Ned.
298
00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:57,395
Oh, that's not true. You've got
the highest average on the team.
299
00:14:57,396 --> 00:14:59,022
I'm nothing compared to you.
300
00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:02,650
Have you noticed I haven't called you
Stupid Flanders once on this mountain?
301
00:15:02,651 --> 00:15:05,069
What do you want, a Nobel Peace Prize?
302
00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:07,989
Sorry, sorry. I really do appreciate it.
303
00:15:07,990 --> 00:15:11,743
Just that I've come to realize
I'm not a natural leader like you.
304
00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:14,621
The Lord has a time and a place
for everyone, my friend.
305
00:15:14,622 --> 00:15:17,832
Homer, if the high altitude
hasn't turned your brain to mulch,
306
00:15:17,833 --> 00:15:19,667
would you like to lead us in prayer?
307
00:15:19,668 --> 00:15:25,424
Heavenly Father, who art in truck stop.
Ping-pong. Rock. Zipper. Jambalaya.
308
00:15:26,133 --> 00:15:27,091
[groans]
309
00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:28,426
[Homer coughs]
310
00:15:28,427 --> 00:15:29,510
Now, don't worry,
311
00:15:29,511 --> 00:15:32,430
just 'cause one of us has a tickle
in his whistle doesn't mean...
312
00:15:32,431 --> 00:15:36,560
[coughing]
313
00:15:37,436 --> 00:15:39,980
We're in the tenth frame, people.
314
00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:45,402
If you want me to eat youse later,
just say nothing. [sighs]
315
00:15:57,247 --> 00:15:58,873
Chief. Any news?
316
00:15:58,874 --> 00:16:01,376
About what? Oh. Right. Um...
317
00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:05,129
Marge, with conditions
as bad as they are on that mountain,
318
00:16:05,130 --> 00:16:08,925
even if they somehow
did survive the crash, uh...
319
00:16:08,926 --> 00:16:11,135
Oh, how can I put this gently?
320
00:16:11,136 --> 00:16:14,639
What do you mean, "gently"?
You basically told me they're dead.
321
00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:17,225
Will you please leave my family be!
322
00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:19,852
[sighs] Never easy being a cop.
323
00:16:19,853 --> 00:16:21,437
Then why did you become one?
324
00:16:21,438 --> 00:16:24,148
'Cause I look great in blue.
It goes with my eyes.
325
00:16:24,149 --> 00:16:25,650
Your eyes are black.
326
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:27,235
Well, I've wasted my life.
327
00:16:27,236 --> 00:16:29,320
[grunts]
328
00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:30,947
Patty and Selma?
329
00:16:30,948 --> 00:16:33,449
Oh. This day couldn't get any worse,
330
00:16:33,450 --> 00:16:35,827
is what my dad would say if he were alive.
331
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:41,040
Marge, dear. At a time like this,
all we wanna do is sit and hold your hand.
332
00:16:41,041 --> 00:16:43,502
No talk, just love.
333
00:16:44,795 --> 00:16:46,838
I did wanna say one thing.
334
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:49,132
Better get your booty shorts
to the cleaners
335
00:16:49,133 --> 00:16:53,261
because you're gonna be the most
popular widow on the pickleball circuit.
336
00:16:53,262 --> 00:16:54,804
He's not dead.
337
00:16:54,805 --> 00:16:56,848
Well, we can't be sure.
338
00:16:56,849 --> 00:17:01,602
But we did use generative AI
to make an image of Homer as a corpse.
339
00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:03,689
To get you used to the idea, dear.
340
00:17:07,317 --> 00:17:09,819
Some of these we had
even before the crash.
341
00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,988
He's not dead. He's not dead.
342
00:17:11,989 --> 00:17:14,991
In fact, I bet
he's even gonna save the day.
343
00:17:14,992 --> 00:17:16,075
[both cough]
344
00:17:16,076 --> 00:17:17,994
Can you excuse us?
345
00:17:17,995 --> 00:17:20,329
We need to go outside and laugh.
346
00:17:20,330 --> 00:17:23,166
[wind whistling]
347
00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:24,709
[Homer] Oh. Is this it?
348
00:17:24,710 --> 00:17:27,879
My story ends now, buried in the snow,
349
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:31,091
frozen alone like broccoli in my freezer?
350
00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:35,053
My dear Son.
351
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:36,929
Are you ready to join me?
352
00:17:36,930 --> 00:17:39,849
I am, Mommy. Take me to the good place.
353
00:17:39,850 --> 00:17:44,020
Mmm... [sighs]
That's not exactly where I am.
354
00:17:44,021 --> 00:17:48,441
They are very hard on former
left-wing radicals in the afterlife.
355
00:17:48,442 --> 00:17:49,609
What are you saying?
356
00:17:49,610 --> 00:17:52,862
I'm in a place
with a lot of incredible people.
357
00:17:52,863 --> 00:17:58,159
Machiavelli, Che Guevara, Casanova.
358
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:01,287
Casanova. Oh, Casanova.
359
00:18:01,288 --> 00:18:05,876
I thought dying in 1798 would keep me
from being Me Tooed.
360
00:18:06,460 --> 00:18:08,128
Um, um...
361
00:18:11,757 --> 00:18:13,841
Mom, what are you making?
362
00:18:13,842 --> 00:18:17,053
All of your father's favorites
for when he comes back.
363
00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:22,725
Pork chops, glazed ham, fried hooves,
snout surprise.
364
00:18:22,726 --> 00:18:25,394
Oh, I can't be in the same room
with that smell.
365
00:18:25,395 --> 00:18:28,148
Yeah, it's pretty disgusting.
366
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,029
[Homer] Hey, someone's cooking.
367
00:18:35,030 --> 00:18:36,281
Marge is cooking.
368
00:18:37,699 --> 00:18:38,992
I can't die here.
369
00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:41,035
My family needs me.
370
00:18:41,036 --> 00:18:46,500
My story is still being written,
and the next word in it is... [screams]
371
00:18:47,501 --> 00:18:48,919
[strains, grunts]
372
00:18:49,711 --> 00:18:51,839
You're coming too, friends.
373
00:19:02,683 --> 00:19:05,352
Hidilly doodily, saviorino.
374
00:19:06,186 --> 00:19:09,773
For once, Flanders, you owe me.
375
00:19:16,738 --> 00:19:18,739
Homer Simpson. [sighs]
376
00:19:18,740 --> 00:19:20,199
What can I say?
377
00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:23,995
He slept through mass,
he'd floss with a Bible ribbon,
378
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:27,832
I'm afraid he leaves behind
no good deed to remember him by.
379
00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:32,671
Just another fat pinball
slipping past God's flippers.
380
00:19:33,297 --> 00:19:35,506
Here's something the church
never heard of:
381
00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:38,009
a guy coming back from the dead!
382
00:19:38,010 --> 00:19:39,010
[all gasp]
383
00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:40,845
God bless him.
384
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:43,681
My bald, beautiful boy.
385
00:19:43,682 --> 00:19:47,685
No good deeds, Reverend?
I've got a new one for your eulogy.
386
00:19:47,686 --> 00:19:50,188
Thank God for Homer Simpson.
387
00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,856
That's my dad.
388
00:19:51,857 --> 00:19:53,442
Suck it, other dads.
389
00:19:55,235 --> 00:19:59,740
You miss two birthdays and a school play,
and suddenly you're the bad guy.
390
00:20:03,535 --> 00:20:06,330
I knew you'd make it back. I knew it.
391
00:20:06,830 --> 00:20:08,081
I knew it.
392
00:20:08,582 --> 00:20:11,709
You were wrong. You were wrong.
393
00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:14,086
And you were wrong, preacher man.
394
00:20:14,087 --> 00:20:16,005
Just premature.
395
00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:20,009
I knew he'd make it
since five seconds ago.
396
00:20:20,010 --> 00:20:23,888
♪ For he's a jolly good fellow
He's now a jolly good fellow ♪
397
00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:26,682
♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪
398
00:20:26,683 --> 00:20:31,062
♪ He totally didn't die ♪
399
00:20:31,063 --> 00:20:34,357
Simpson, I always knew you had it in you.
400
00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:38,528
That'll do, Flanders. That'll do. Oh.
401
00:20:49,915 --> 00:20:52,959
{\an8}I'm alive. I'm alive!
402
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,086
{\an8}Well, you don't have
to make a meal out of it.
403
00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:56,671
{\an8}[whooping]
404
00:20:56,672 --> 00:21:00,383
{\an8}♪ For he's a jolly good fellow
He's now a jolly good fellow ♪
405
00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:03,427
{\an8}♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪
406
00:21:03,428 --> 00:21:06,139
{\an8}♪ He totally didn't die ♪
407
00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:31,123
Shh.
408
00:21:31,873 --> 00:21:32,958
[bowling pins clattering]
29240
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