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"Blue Canvas of Youthful Days"
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(Episode 9: The Protector's Projection)
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It used to be okay to do this.
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But now, for our Xiao Tan,
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it's just too unfair.
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So,
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don't come looking for me anymore.
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I could be your younger brother.
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Your younger brother.
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I'm very happy.
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Why are you so happy?
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I...
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That thing I was struggling
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with a few days ago.
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About that girl.
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Geez, what girl?
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Anyway,
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I finally took that step.
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Well...
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Congratulations.
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Why that face?
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Weren't you out with Lao Liu?
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He said,
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I remind him of his deceased brother.
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I told him,
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I'm fine with being like
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a younger brother to him.
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Why did he...
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do this?
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I suggested it.
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You also think
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he only cares for me as a brother?
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But what does he think?
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Maybe he just needs more time.
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To sort himself out.
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What's there to sort out?
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Love isn't something
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that needs organizing.
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Life between two people
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will always have surprises.
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There won't be any changes in life?
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It's just self-deception.
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One day,
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he'll figure it out.
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Actually, I have an idea.
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Something that might push Lao Liu a bit.
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Do you want to try?
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Xiao Lu.
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Mom.
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You're back?
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Let's find a place to sit,
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alright?
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I thought
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you wouldn't come back again.
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I promised you,
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I'd take you with me when I left.
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Did you ever consider,
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before you came back,
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that he might've beaten me to death?
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Xiao Lu.
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I've already come to terms
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with being abandoned by you,
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tossed aside to him.
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What's the point of showing up now?
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Those first few years after I left,
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life was hard.
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I couldn't even afford
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a plane ticket back.
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Later, I signed with a gallery.
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Things got better little by little.
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I thought,
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I should save up and
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and have a place to live,
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I could bring you over.
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Are you still drawing?
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I know you've been learning art
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all this time.
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If you like it,
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I could take you abroad with me.
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We could apply for schools,
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so you could leave him sooner.
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I don't like drawing.
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Not at all.
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I don't have your talent,
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nor am I like Dad, who sees fame
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and fortune in it.
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Is there anything you do like doing?
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I could help you with that.
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I'll need to think about it.
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Senior Sister.
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Come in, come in.
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Wait a moment,
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I'll make you some coffee.
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Here.
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Thanks.
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Alright.
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I'm here today to bring you this.
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Professor Guo's solo exhibition.
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He's missed you a lot over the years.
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At several reunions,
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he didn't get to see you.
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This is his first solo exhibition
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in 10 years.
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You must come.
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Sure,
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I'll definitely be there.
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Excuse me, do you know Qi Lu?
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We were supposed to meet today,
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but my phone died,
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and I can't reach him.
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If I see him, I'll let him know.
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Thanks, student.
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Just tell him his brother
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is looking for him.
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Alright.
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Who are you? Why are you
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looking for Qi Lu?
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We're, well...
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online friends.
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You're Qin Xiao, aren't you?
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How do you know that?
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Like I said, we're friends online.
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Good online friends, actually.
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Of course I know you.
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What? He's never told you
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about his friends online?
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Friends... well,
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It's not like you have to always say
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whether your friends are
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important or not.
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You can call me Lao Bai.
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I'm probably a few years older
than you guys.
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Just graduated last year.
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Got it. I'll pass the message.
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It's been three years,
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and this is your first new piece, huh?
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Just a little trinket I threw together.
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Is this Kollwitz's print?
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Yes.
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A mother cradling her lost child,
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shielding the child with her body.
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In your work,
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are you portraying yourself
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as the protector?
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When I first saw that piece,
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I felt an emotional connection.
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There's a story about Kollwitz.
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Her eldest son,
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sacrifice on the front lines of war.
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While creating the image of a
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mother mourning her lost child,
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she sketched herself in the mirror,
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holding her youngest son.
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The mother-and-child reflection
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in the mirror
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often made her see her youngest
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as if he were her lost eldest son.
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During the creative process,
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she would often cry in grief.
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Her youngest son would
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wipe away her tears,
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telling her not to weep.
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Sadly,
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when her youngest son grew up,
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he too was lost in the war.
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In your new work,
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the one being protected...
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Is Yangyang.
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Yangyang. But...
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Ah!
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Sorry! Sorry!
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No, it's fine.
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It's fine. It's fine.
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That was...
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A friend.
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- Aren't you going to go after him?
- No need.
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I met Yangyang once back in the day.
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Don't you think
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in your work,
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the protected figure
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looks less like Yangyang
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and more like that boy who just left?
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Is he your model?
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Like...
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Like him?
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I hadn't noticed.
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Those attending today's self-study
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session should practice more sketches.
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Take turns being each other's models.
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Teacher Liu will be checking
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them tomorrow.
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Are you going to try that method?
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No idea.
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I just left his place.
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I'll call now.
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Stop nagging.
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Hello.
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Lao Liu, it's me.
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Qin Xiao?
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What's going on with you and Tan Yin?
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What happened to him?
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Why did he say he's leaving?
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I just got home and saw him with
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his suitcase, saying he's leaving.
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Did he mention where he's going?
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I have no idea.
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Don't worry about it. I'll go find him.
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Where are you hiding?
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Don't you know how worried Lao Liu is?
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I went to a place
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where he would definitely find me.
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Are you upset about that photo?
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I can take care of you,
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like a brother taking care
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of his younger sibling.
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(Teacher Liu, you have to eat on time)
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Don't you think in your work,
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the protected figure
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looks less like Yangyang and
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more like that boy who just left?
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You mean
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Xiao Tan?
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Is he your model?
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Like him?
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I hadn't noticed.
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There's a story about Kollwitz.
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Her eldest son,
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sacrifice on the front lines of war.
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While creating the image of a
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mother mourning her lost child,
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she sketched herself in the mirror,
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holding her youngest son.
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The mother-and-child reflection
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in the mirror
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often made her see her youngest
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as if he were her lost eldest son.
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Would finding a boy who
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looks exactly like Yangyang
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make up for it?
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Your brother is dead.
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Sadly,
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when her youngest son grew up,
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he too was lost in the war.
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Seeing the youngest
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as the lost eldest...
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The protected one...
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is Yangyang.
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Like him?
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So, you're here for a documentary?
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Want to collaborate?
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Oh right, you've got your art exam prep.
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Probably no time.
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Actually, there's something
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I need to tell you.
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I might have a chance to study abroad,
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away from my dad.
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That's great!
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My mom came back.
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She said
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I could go abroad to study filmmaking.
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What's there to hesitate about?
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Go!
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You've loved
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filmmaking for so long.
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If you have the chance,
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why not take it?
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Because of Qin Xiao?
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If I go,
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I might not see him for a long time.
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And he's still preparing for his exams.
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You're assuming things for him again.
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How do you know
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he wouldn't be happy for you,
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knowing you've found something you love?
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You haven't even told him about it.
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It's me who would miss him.
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Huajing Art university
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00:14:39,784 --> 00:14:41,393
has an exchange program every year
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00:14:41,418 --> 00:14:42,752
with CalArts in the U.S.
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That school
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also has one of the top-ranked
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film programs in the world.
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If he gets into Huajing this year,
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you'd only be apart for one year.
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Then at the same school,
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00:14:54,424 --> 00:14:55,904
you could both study your passions.
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Sounds tough.
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Tougher than spending so many years
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00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:05,555
doing things you hate?
290
00:15:06,080 --> 00:15:08,101
Alright, think about it yourself.
291
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:10,554
I need to meet the subject
292
00:15:10,579 --> 00:15:12,099
of my documentary.
293
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:14,281
Be careful.
294
00:15:14,306 --> 00:15:15,639
Sounds dangerous.
295
00:15:15,639 --> 00:15:16,813
No worries. Worst case,
296
00:15:16,838 --> 00:15:17,992
I'll call the police.
297
00:15:18,039 --> 00:15:19,742
Good will prevail. See you.
298
00:15:25,320 --> 00:15:27,215
Why are you here at lunch break?
299
00:15:27,240 --> 00:15:28,889
Came to pick you up.
300
00:15:28,914 --> 00:15:30,519
Boyfriend.
301
00:15:30,519 --> 00:15:32,508
Don't make me smack you.
302
00:15:33,279 --> 00:15:34,286
Why haven't you been coming
303
00:15:34,302 --> 00:15:35,162
to the studio again?
304
00:15:35,187 --> 00:15:36,642
Even Lao Liu hasn't said
anything about you.
305
00:15:36,667 --> 00:15:37,841
I took the morning off.
306
00:15:37,865 --> 00:15:39,138
Went to meet a teacher.
307
00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:42,148
Don't tell me it's teacher Bai?
308
00:15:42,720 --> 00:15:44,484
What weird things are you saying?
309
00:15:44,921 --> 00:15:46,234
I saw it all.
310
00:15:46,759 --> 00:15:47,840
Jealous?
311
00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:48,840
How bad.
312
00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:51,726
I really just went to see a teacher.
313
00:15:51,919 --> 00:15:53,161
Then I bumped into Senior Bai
314
00:15:53,169 --> 00:15:54,072
on my way back.
315
00:15:54,097 --> 00:15:55,262
When I was courting you,
316
00:15:55,286 --> 00:15:56,276
it was his idea.
317
00:15:56,301 --> 00:15:57,975
I don't think the ideas were that great.
318
00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,898
Not sure what he was thinking.
319
00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:05,173
How can you still be so jealous at 20?
320
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:10,080
Come here.
321
00:16:31,588 --> 00:16:32,960
Umm.. Xiao Rui!
322
00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:39,119
- Umm... We...
- I didn't see anything.
323
00:16:39,144 --> 00:16:40,144
Umm...
324
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:45,824
Forget it.
325
00:16:45,849 --> 00:16:46,855
Even if I did see,
326
00:16:46,863 --> 00:16:47,976
I wouldn't tell anyone.
327
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,230
- Sorry.
- Huh?
328
00:16:49,255 --> 00:16:50,324
Didn't intentionally hide it from you.
329
00:16:50,349 --> 00:16:52,370
I know, don't worry.
330
00:16:53,915 --> 00:16:55,430
Just because I like you doesn't mean I
331
00:16:55,446 --> 00:16:56,754
want to ruin things between you two.
332
00:16:56,779 --> 00:16:58,666
I'm not some evil supporting actress.
333
00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:00,358
I'll head out now.
334
00:17:00,383 --> 00:17:01,383
- Bye-bye.
- Bye-bye.
335
00:17:01,408 --> 00:17:02,408
Bye-bye.
336
00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:08,615
It's all sorted.
337
00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:09,877
Xiao Rui's a good person.
338
00:17:09,999 --> 00:17:11,299
She won't say anything.
339
00:17:13,039 --> 00:17:14,117
I actually thought you two
340
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:15,050
might end up together.
341
00:17:15,075 --> 00:17:16,075
Why?
342
00:17:16,839 --> 00:17:18,612
I saw her bring you bubble tea.
343
00:17:18,920 --> 00:17:20,362
And...
344
00:17:21,079 --> 00:17:22,079
You two hugged.
345
00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:24,133
So, that's why you avoided coming
346
00:17:24,165 --> 00:17:25,355
to the studio for a while?
347
00:17:25,379 --> 00:17:26,379
Yeah.
348
00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:32,000
Qin Xiao.
349
00:17:35,905 --> 00:17:37,330
Here, take this.
350
00:17:37,370 --> 00:17:38,635
Consider it a reward for
351
00:17:38,651 --> 00:17:39,745
keeping my secret.
352
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:42,424
Come on,
353
00:17:42,449 --> 00:17:44,213
take it, or I won't feel at ease.
354
00:17:45,244 --> 00:17:46,799
Alright then.
355
00:17:47,987 --> 00:17:48,987
You...
356
00:17:49,012 --> 00:17:50,621
Do you have time this weekend
357
00:17:50,629 --> 00:17:52,295
for some sketching together?
358
00:17:52,319 --> 00:17:53,319
Nah,
359
00:17:53,587 --> 00:17:55,173
Qi Lu is busy.
360
00:17:55,279 --> 00:17:56,901
Ask Turtle to keep you company instead.
361
00:17:58,759 --> 00:18:00,400
Why are you purposely avoiding me?
362
00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:04,876
Actually,
363
00:18:04,901 --> 00:18:06,799
being liked and appreciated...
364
00:18:06,799 --> 00:18:08,549
It's a happy thing.
365
00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:11,257
But right now, I just want to
366
00:18:11,282 --> 00:18:12,722
focus on my exams.
367
00:18:13,200 --> 00:18:15,376
I don't know if saying this...
368
00:18:15,401 --> 00:18:16,401
Would...
369
00:18:16,452 --> 00:18:17,440
It won't.
370
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:23,440
Then, how about a hug?
371
00:18:24,657 --> 00:18:25,946
As a symbol of the start
372
00:18:25,971 --> 00:18:26,994
of our friendship.
373
00:18:40,381 --> 00:18:41,690
Try to find Lao Liu soon.
374
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:43,720
He'll think of a way to help you.
375
00:18:48,215 --> 00:18:49,215
Qi Lu,
376
00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:50,863
You like to say that I make you
feel uncomfortable.
377
00:18:50,888 --> 00:18:52,119
But have you noticed?
378
00:18:52,119 --> 00:18:54,061
Who's the one who never speaks clearly?
379
00:18:54,772 --> 00:18:55,975
- Huh?
- Then...
380
00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:57,773
How about I confess something
381
00:18:57,797 --> 00:18:58,773
to you when we get back?
382
00:18:58,797 --> 00:18:59,797
Yeah.
383
00:19:00,086 --> 00:19:01,105
Let's go.
384
00:19:01,519 --> 00:19:02,920
Studying film?
385
00:19:04,319 --> 00:19:05,639
Actually, back in school,
386
00:19:05,664 --> 00:19:06,865
I joined the film club.
387
00:19:07,672 --> 00:19:09,803
That's also how I met Senior Bai.
388
00:19:11,509 --> 00:19:12,509
But,
389
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:13,936
later, my dad found out.
390
00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:15,850
I didn't get a chance to continue.
391
00:19:17,640 --> 00:19:19,561
So Senior Bai was the only one who knew?
392
00:19:19,664 --> 00:19:21,653
Come on, can't you speak nicely?
393
00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:27,458
Go for it, Qi Lu.
394
00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:32,559
My mom said...
395
00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:35,319
It requires one year.
396
00:19:37,799 --> 00:19:38,830
Just one year where
397
00:19:38,846 --> 00:19:39,936
we can't see each other.
398
00:19:40,053 --> 00:19:41,244
But after that,
399
00:19:41,269 --> 00:19:43,017
we'll be able to do what we love.
400
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:44,490
Like you said,
401
00:19:44,759 --> 00:19:46,544
We should do what we love.
402
00:19:46,845 --> 00:19:48,286
Love who we want to love.
403
00:19:48,881 --> 00:19:50,287
Brother Xiao, what do you want
404
00:19:50,319 --> 00:19:51,456
to be in the future?
405
00:19:51,496 --> 00:19:52,496
Be a human.
406
00:19:52,521 --> 00:19:54,193
Be serious.
407
00:19:54,255 --> 00:19:55,599
What career do you want?
408
00:19:55,599 --> 00:19:57,075
Where do you want to live in the future?
409
00:19:57,224 --> 00:19:59,646
Haven't I told you before?
410
00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:02,177
I want to teach kids how to draw.
411
00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:03,841
After I finish university,
412
00:20:03,866 --> 00:20:05,013
I'll become a teacher.
413
00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:06,472
In my free time, I can still
414
00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:07,659
do my own drawings.
415
00:20:10,272 --> 00:20:11,494
Then I'll just...
416
00:20:11,519 --> 00:20:13,458
be a director.
417
00:20:14,177 --> 00:20:15,034
Wouldn't you need to
418
00:20:15,050 --> 00:20:15,911
travel around a lot?
419
00:20:15,935 --> 00:20:16,935
Nope.
420
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:18,646
I'll shoot films in my hometown.
421
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,257
After wrapping up for the day,
422
00:20:20,281 --> 00:20:21,616
I'll come pick you up from work.
423
00:20:21,647 --> 00:20:22,835
On weekends, we can go
424
00:20:22,874 --> 00:20:24,176
for walks together.
425
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:25,474
Like today,
426
00:20:25,650 --> 00:20:27,115
strolling by Heihu Spring.
427
00:20:27,559 --> 00:20:29,079
When we're tired from walking,
428
00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:30,779
we'll grab some late-night snacks.
429
00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:32,240
Just eating and playing?
430
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:33,312
Isn't a happy life just
431
00:20:33,328 --> 00:20:34,406
eating and playing?
432
00:20:42,457 --> 00:20:43,771
Go get ready.
433
00:20:44,197 --> 00:20:45,197
For what?
434
00:20:45,222 --> 00:20:46,404
Studying abroad.
435
00:20:46,799 --> 00:20:47,855
Learning the language,
436
00:20:47,886 --> 00:20:49,039
preparing your portfolio.
437
00:20:49,064 --> 00:20:50,507
It's all pretty busy, right?
438
00:20:51,287 --> 00:20:52,527
It won't be in time for the
439
00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:53,775
university entrance exam.
440
00:20:53,799 --> 00:20:55,191
Actually, I'd like to help with
441
00:20:55,216 --> 00:20:56,644
Lao Bai's documentary, too.
442
00:20:57,400 --> 00:20:58,591
What's he shooting?
443
00:20:58,855 --> 00:20:59,855
He said he knows
444
00:20:59,880 --> 00:21:01,347
someone in an urban village
445
00:21:01,371 --> 00:21:02,815
who makes fake diet pills.
446
00:21:02,839 --> 00:21:04,081
Seems like Lao Bai has some
447
00:21:04,106 --> 00:21:05,159
interesting ideas.
448
00:21:08,530 --> 00:21:09,958
Fake diet pills?
449
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:11,177
What's wrong?
450
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:15,200
Sounds kinda dangerous.
451
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:16,396
Maybe you shouldn't go.
452
00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:17,793
Geez. It's fine.
453
00:21:17,818 --> 00:21:19,160
It's not like I'm going undercover.
454
00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:20,599
Don't worry, it'll be okay.
455
00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:34,999
Has Lao Liu found you yet?
456
00:21:49,764 --> 00:21:50,764
Where are you going?
457
00:21:52,877 --> 00:21:53,877
None of your business.
458
00:21:59,319 --> 00:22:00,640
Why are you leaving?
459
00:22:02,416 --> 00:22:03,564
Didn't you promise to be
460
00:22:03,588 --> 00:22:04,603
my little brother?
461
00:22:05,322 --> 00:22:06,376
Why are you leaving
462
00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:07,469
without saying a word?
463
00:22:07,494 --> 00:22:09,197
Do you know how worried I was?
464
00:22:10,599 --> 00:22:11,830
There are too many people that
465
00:22:11,855 --> 00:22:12,931
you need to care about.
466
00:22:20,279 --> 00:22:21,631
That was my senior.
467
00:22:22,119 --> 00:22:23,482
She came to deliver an invitation
468
00:22:23,507 --> 00:22:24,747
from the professor.
469
00:22:25,279 --> 00:22:26,952
When you arrived, she had accidentally
470
00:22:28,119 --> 00:22:30,210
spilled coffee on me.
471
00:22:32,039 --> 00:22:33,350
I'm not jealous.
472
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:34,720
Yes,
473
00:22:36,169 --> 00:22:37,710
I know you're not jealous.
474
00:22:39,599 --> 00:22:41,091
I just thought it was necessary
475
00:22:41,115 --> 00:22:42,208
to explain it clearly.
476
00:22:44,039 --> 00:22:46,393
And I want to turn this explanation
477
00:22:48,559 --> 00:22:50,519
into an opportunity to confess to you.
478
00:23:06,839 --> 00:23:07,839
Let's go.
479
00:23:07,936 --> 00:23:08,936
Come home with me.
480
00:23:09,456 --> 00:23:11,049
I want to show you something.
481
00:23:21,771 --> 00:23:23,033
This relief sculpture
482
00:23:23,806 --> 00:23:25,432
was adapted from this painting.
483
00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:28,247
The image shows a mother
484
00:23:28,272 --> 00:23:29,334
protecting her child.
485
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:32,606
Initially, I wanted to create
486
00:23:32,630 --> 00:23:33,918
the image of a protector.
487
00:23:34,744 --> 00:23:36,585
Me protecting Yangyang.
488
00:23:37,839 --> 00:23:39,240
But later...
489
00:23:39,759 --> 00:23:41,359
Perhaps unconsciously...
490
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:44,675
That image slowly turned into you.
491
00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:55,960
Xiao Tan,
492
00:23:57,720 --> 00:23:59,126
I'm not sure if it's too late
493
00:23:59,150 --> 00:24:00,510
to say this now.
494
00:24:01,334 --> 00:24:02,832
Or if it seems insincere.
495
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:07,160
That night, when I was drunk...
496
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:09,820
I knew it was you the whole time.
497
00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:13,720
You took off your hearing aid
498
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:15,109
and couldn't hear what I said.
499
00:24:17,519 --> 00:24:19,242
Later, I realized you misunderstood me,
500
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:21,081
but I didn't have the courage to
501
00:24:21,106 --> 00:24:22,621
face the fact that I liked you.
502
00:24:25,240 --> 00:24:27,242
So I just went along with the lie.
503
00:24:29,799 --> 00:24:31,119
But now that
504
00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:33,400
you've sorted yourself out...
505
00:24:41,937 --> 00:24:43,241
I don't know what would
506
00:24:43,266 --> 00:24:44,733
be considered sorted myself out.
507
00:24:45,522 --> 00:24:47,180
But today, when I heard you were leaving
508
00:24:48,359 --> 00:24:49,922
I was really scared.
509
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:54,070
I can't imagine a life without you.
510
00:24:54,487 --> 00:24:55,927
So, Xiao Tan...
511
00:24:58,839 --> 00:25:00,680
Give me another chance to be brave.
512
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:01,805
Please?
513
00:25:12,759 --> 00:25:14,518
If you say it like this...
514
00:25:14,543 --> 00:25:16,471
I'll take it seriously.
515
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:20,140
In the future, you will not be
516
00:25:20,148 --> 00:25:21,452
snatched away by others.
517
00:25:23,680 --> 00:25:24,847
Let's make it official.
518
00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:26,920
Okay.
519
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:34,227
Today, I realized
520
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:36,610
I can't just be your little brother.
521
00:25:38,930 --> 00:25:41,680
Seeing others by your side...
522
00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:43,555
Makes me unhappy.
523
00:25:49,883 --> 00:25:50,883
Look.
524
00:25:50,908 --> 00:25:52,798
This is my signature.
525
00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:57,149
Leave your mark beside it.
526
00:28:29,981 --> 00:28:31,299
What are you doing?
527
00:28:32,455 --> 00:28:33,517
Looking for relatives.
528
00:28:33,542 --> 00:28:34,408
Been wandering around,
529
00:28:34,424 --> 00:28:35,114
can't find the place.
530
00:28:35,138 --> 00:28:36,315
Is Xiao Jiande here?
531
00:28:36,340 --> 00:28:38,181
There isn't, now scram.
532
00:29:13,405 --> 00:29:15,737
Go find out who these two are.
533
00:29:15,761 --> 00:29:17,256
Where are they?
534
00:29:17,440 --> 00:29:18,440
Where they live.
535
00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:19,720
Got it.
536
00:29:20,519 --> 00:29:21,519
Understood.
33574
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