Original subtitles

I thought Pinkie Pie said to get here right away.

She sure had a burr in her britches about something.

So, where is she?

Yeah. What is taking her so long?

[giggle] Just kidding.

You guys really need to look behind you once in a while.

Uh, Pinkie, you said you had something important

to tell us.

Not telling so much as showing.

In fact, what you're about to see

may shake the very foundations of your perception

for all time!

Um...a cupcake?

YES! But wait! There's more.

[boing]

It's an invitation to visit

the Cheese Sandwich Amusement Factory!

Cheese Sandwich opened a factory?

What do they make there? Rubber chickens?

That's ridiculous. They make way more there

than just rubber chickens!

Gosh, Cheese hardly seems the factory type.

I just assumed he'd continue to wander Equestria

throwing parties. Still, you must be excited to see him.

I am! I can't wait to tour his factory, catch up,

have him tell me my life's purpose, swap gag tips.

Whoa-whoa-whoa. What did you say?

Uh, catch up? I mean, it has been a while.

I think Applejack's asking about the part

about Cheese Sandwich and your life's purpose?

Oh, that. Yeah. It's just all of you have found your thing.

You're going to rule all of Equestria.

Rainbow Dash is a Wonderbolt.

Fluttershy has her animal sanctuary.

Rarity has her boutiques.

Applejack has that hat... and the farm,

so that's, like, two things.

I don't even have one.

When I first got Cheese's invite, I was a little jealous.

It felt like even he was moving on

to bigger and better things

and everypony was leaving me behind.

But then I realized Cheese Sandwich is a party pony

just like me.

If he figured out his purpose, he can help me figure out mine!

I think talking to Cheese Sandwich is a great idea,

but the only pony who can really find

your life's purpose is you.

I know, silly. That's why I'm going to visit

Cheese Sandwich's factory so I can ask him to help me!

Uh, Pinkie, are you sure this is edible?

I am not!

[chomp chomp chomp]

♪♪

♪ My little pony, my little pony ♪

♪ Aaaahhh ♪

♪ My little Pony ♪

♪ I used to wonder what friendship could be. ♪

♪ My Little Pony ♪

♪ Until you all shared its magic with me. ♪

♪ Big adventure! ♪ ♪ Tons of fun ♪

♪ A beautiful heart! ♪ ♪ Faithful and strong! ♪

♪ Sharing kindness ♪ ♪ it's an easy feat ♪

♪ And magic makes it all complete! ♪

♪ To have my little pony ♪

♪ Do you know you're all my very best friends? ♪

♪♪

♪♪

Yep. Anypony with a smile like that

is exactly the kind of pony I want helping me.

♪♪

Oh, hey guys. Pardon me. Just gonna squeeze by.

Can we help you?

You sure can. I'm here to see Cheese Sandwich!

Cheese Sandwich doesn't "see" anypony.

This factory is shut tight.

Nopony ever comes out and nopony ever goes in,

including you, so move along.

Oh, that's a shame.

To think I came all this way

because of this personal invitation

from Cheese Sandwich himself.

You...you have an invitation?

Well, why didn't you say so?

[wailing siren]

[gates crash open]

Next time, I get to push the button.

Oh. Desolate-y.

Hello? Anypony there?

[frightened squeal]

Cheese, I'm so happy to see you!

Hmmm. This should have gotten a big laugh.

I wonder if we need to add more carpet rolls.

I suppose it could be the mask.

Let's try taking the nostril flare down 10%. Thoughts?

I have a thought. Who are you?

So sorry. Sans Smirk,

Vice-President of amusement integration.

Mr. Sandwich is very excited you're here.

If you'll just follow me,

it's a short trip through the factory to Cheese's office.

Wow. A whole factory dedicated to gags.

Ooh! I bet this is the fun-est place ever!

[crash]

Huh.

Maybe the fun is behind all this

boring-looking factory stuff.

[clang]

The fun is the factory stuff.

We take a fairly serious approach to comedy here.

Observe.

Oh, look. A pretty flower.

[sniff sniff]

[splash]

The squirting flower's a classic.

Ohhh! What if the flower was part of a shirt,

but the flower didn't squirt; the shirt did!

That. Is. Literally.

The funniest thing I've ever heard.

Oh, come on. That's just off the top of my head.

You probably get like seventeen thousand ideas

like that from Cheese every minute.

We'd have to use a series

of interconnected tubes in the fabric.

What do you think of this?

[raspberry noise]

I think it's a whoopie cushion.

Yes.

But what if you made the embarrassing sound

come from somepony else?

I sit on it, but the sound comes from you!

We could call it the "Ventriloquoopee Cushion"!

[excited murmurs]

So which way is Cheese's office again?

Right. Of course. It's been quite a while

since we've had the opportunity to work

with true comic inspiration like this.

What about Cheese?

Oh! One more thing.

Our "Super-Slip Banana Peel."

Still in development, but we think it's pretty special.

♪♪

[falling yells]

♪♪

So? Too slippery?

Oh! What if instead of slipping, you were sticking?

One step on this banana peel and you can't get it off.

That's funny!

Wow. Just wow.

You're exactly the pony Cheese Sandwich needs to see.

Great!

Because he's exactly the pony I need to see.

Uh? Hello?

[quiet and subdued voice] Pinkie, I'm - I'm glad you came.

Of course I did! Your factory is big!

It really seems like you found your purpose,

which is perfect, since I came here for help.

That is perfect! I knew I could count on you to help me.

Well, that's triple perfect because- Uh, wait.

Why do you need my help?

Because, Pinkie, I,

[clap clap]

I've completely lost my laugh!

♪ [horror sting] ♪

You lost your laugh?

Is that some kind of joke? Because it's not a funny one.

It's not a joke.

And even if it was, I wouldn't be able to laugh at it.

Right.

Why don't we continue this discussion

over some delicious canned peanut brittle?

Ha-ha!

Wow. You did lose your laugh. That's horrible!

Sorry to interrupt, but it occurs to me

that a 7% tighter wind on the snake springs

would yield a 12% increase in giggle output.

This is why we're a team.

Sans, here, has always been able to eke every last laugh

out of my gags. Which, which is a help,

since I haven't come up with any good ones in a while.

Wait. So you can tell if a gag is funny or not;

you just can't laugh at it?

YES! And it's torture!

How did this happen?

I don't know.

Back when I was a party pony, I laughed at everything.

♪♪

I spread my party cheer wherever it was needed.

I even started making individual,

one-of-a-kind novelty gags

for each and every one of my parties.

♪♪

[whack]

[clatter]

[laughter]

Soon, it seemed like everypony in Equestria wanted one.

[zap]

Ha ha!

It was more work than my hooves could handle,

but I didn't want to disappoint

all those smiling faces.

Luckily, Sans Smirk came to me with the idea for a factory.

A gag factory.

♪ [majestic music] ♪

I could finally keep up with demand

and make everypony happy.

Soon we were sending gags all over Equestria.

♪ [busy music] ♪

♪♪

[croak]

♪♪

[spray]

♪ [music slows down and stops] ♪

But then, one day my laugh was just gone.

I haven't left the factory since.

I don't want anypony to see me like this.

I mean look at me, Boneless 2

doesn't even recognize me anymore!

So can you help me, Pinkie? What do you think?

I think I've got two words for you, Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Boo.

Boo who?

Don't cry because I'm gonna get you your laugh back!

Let's start with something small.

Excuse me, Mr. Smirk,

but is there something in my eye?

Top notch eye-googling, Ms. Pie.

Hmm.

Why thanks, Sans, old pal. Put 'er there.

[loud buzz]

Oh! Sorry about that.

Let me make it up to you. How about some pie?

Googly eye to hoof buzzer to pieface pratfall.

Mwah! Masterful.

Meh.

Come on! Those classic bits put Rainbow Dash's funny bone

in a cast for a week!

Don't blame yourself, Pinkie. Whatever I got, I got it bad.

Hmm. Maybe we need to start even smaller.

You can't run before you can walk

and you can't laugh before you can smile.

And your smiler's all out of whack.

Now let's see what we're working with.

Gimme your biggest, bestest smile!

[moan]

Am I doing it? Am I smiling? I feel like I'm smiling.

Almost! Maybe I just need to spot you for a rep or two.

♪ [military snare drum] ♪

[grunts]

OK! You've got this! It's all you! Ready?

Anything?

[groan]

Gah.

I'm not giving up on you yet, Cheese.

I know there's something somewhere

that'll make you laugh.

I just have to figure out where to look.

I would like to take this opportunity

to point out that we are in a gag factory.

This is where the magic happens.

Research and development.

It's where we figure out the science of funny.

How do you science funny?

Of course, there's no one-size-fits-all joke,

no grand unified gag theory.

But, if we figure out the funny of one gag,

we can combine it with the funny of another gag

and make a third funnier gag.

[splat]

I guess that makes sense.

Rule of threes. Hm, one, two, three.

Yep, that math checks out.

Hmmm. At this point,

I'm willing to give anything a try!

♪ [dance beat] ♪

♪♪

[clang]

[splash]

♪♪

I don't understand. I've tried everything.

Stand-up, classic gags, physical humor, prop comedy,

vaudeville, surrealist alt-scene character pieces.

Nothing's worked!

It seems we've exhausted every avenue

that even the science of comedy can provide.

That's it, then.

What do you mean?

I appreciate everything you've done, Pinkie,

but if you can't make me laugh, nopony can.

But, sir, you can't just surrender.

It doesn't look like I have a choice.

I need to figure out how to live without a laugh.

I know you tried your best, but it's time you went home.

[gasp]

I too am horrified.

So that's it? You're all just giving up?

I'm afraid Mr. Sandwich is right.

You are the funniest pony in Equestria

and if you can't bring back his laugh,

it is surely gone forever.

But Cheese was just as funny as me.

I can't believe that's all gone.

None of us can.

I shudder to think what will become of the factory.

You're not going to close down are you?

I thought this place was Cheese's life's purpose.

It certainly was mine, but if Mr. Sandwich

has finally given up, there's only so long

we can re-tool his old ideas

before we run out of gags to produce.

I don't suppose you'd consider working here?

Your fresh take on our classic gags

rivals Mr. Sandwich in his prime.

I need to find my life's purpose,

but I don't think that's it.

I'm a party pony.

I need to make ponies happy in real time!

Ah, yes. In our early days, nothing brought Mr. Sandwich

more pleasure than seeing the laughter his gags brought

to ponies first hoof.

Guess it's back to the drawing board.

Well, there will always be a place for you here

if you change your mind.

Hold on. What did you just say?

There'll always be a place here.

No-no-no-no. Before that.

Back to the drawing board?

That was me!

Nothing brought Mr. Sandwich more pleasure

than seeing the laughter his gags brought

to ponies first hoof?

YES! That! We've been going about this all wrong.

We don't need to make Cheese laugh.

He needs to make US laugh!

Cheese! I figured it out. I know why you can't laugh.

What? Why?

You started this factory because you didn't want

to disappoint smiling faces,

but in here you can't see any!

It does make a certain sense, sir.

Spreading laughter has always brought you joy.

But spreading laughter is what this factory does.

Except you don't see it.

You're a party pony like me.

You need to make ponies smile in person!

Here! Just try it.

OK. Um, why did Boneless 2 cross the road?

To prove to Boneless 1 he wasn't a chicken.

Very funny sir. Excellent joke. Oh! I mean, Ha. Ha, ha.

Really?

Sorry. Not much of a laugher.

Here. Try me. I promise I'll laugh.

Pinkie, you laugh at everything.

I appreciate what you're doing,

but I think it's a cost laws, er, a lost cause.

[chortling]

What. Was. That?

I'm sorry. But when you swapped the letters

of those words, it was just a bit...

...Funny?

Uh huh.

♪ So you're saying it's a mix up ♪

♪ of the sounds that I just made ♪

♪ that coaxed the snicker from your throat ♪

♪ in a delicate cascade? ♪

♪ If I did it one more time, if I reproduced that feat ♪

♪ Mixed up some letters here and there ♪

♪ you'd lelly baugh tout suite? ♪

[laughter]

♪ Then that's all I need to do ♪

♪ that's who I need to be ♪

♪ I thought I needed laughter but it has to come from me ♪

♪ Squirting flowers and knobby knees, ♪

♪ Rubber chickens my expertise ♪

♪ If you want laughter then stick with Cheese! ♪

Pinkie: Yeah!

♪♪

♪ I suppose now I should amp things up ♪

♪ to get the thing I'm after. ♪

♪ Move whole syllables around ♪

♪ and change emphasis to get laughter! ♪

♪ I can't stop now I'm on a roll, I've almost got it back ♪

♪ Bright folks like you aren't subject to ♪

♪ my play on words attack. ♪

♪ With something else I'll have to play ♪

♪ to get me where I'm going. ♪

What you gonna do?

[high soprano] ♪ Some Commedia dell'arte ♪

♪ to get the laughter flowing. ♪

♪ And it's what I need to do ♪

♪ it's who I need to be! ♪

♪ I thought I needed laughter but it has to come from me. ♪

♪ Follow right behind, if you please. ♪

♪ Walk this way and I guarantee. ♪

♪ If you want laughter then stick with Cheese. ♪

Accordion solo!

Shred it, Cheese!

♪ [fast accordion] ♪

♪ And it's what I need to do ♪

♪ it's who I need to be! ♪

♪ I thought I needed laughter but it has to come from me. ♪

♪ Whoopie cushions and dungarees. ♪

♪ I know jokes like my ABC's. ♪

♪ If you want laughter ♪

♪ then stick with Cheese. ♪

♪ ♪

♪ And now my biggest test, ♪

♪ the hardest fish to fry. ♪

♪ Oooh-ooh-ooh! ♪

♪ A mind so analytical ♪

♪ a sense of humor dry. ♪

♪ So dry! ♪

♪ To make you laugh would prove to me ♪

♪ that this experiment's done.♪

♪ Oooh-ooh-ooh! ♪

♪ Something ridiculous and not too smart. ♪

♪ Something like a pun! ♪

Hey Sans, how did the laughing bird's eggs hatch?

They cracked up.

Sir. That is so... ridiculous! [raucous laughter]

♪ Then that's all I need to do ♪

♪ that's all I need to see! ♪

♪ I thought I needed laughter but it had to come from me. ♪

♪ Squirting flowers and knobby knees, ♪

♪ rubber chickens and dungarees. ♪

♪ If you want laughter then stick with Cheese! ♪

♪♪

[giggling]

It's so good to have you back, sir.

Finally we can get the factory back to how things used to be!

Sans, my good pony,

I don't think I can run this factory anymore.

But YOU can!

Without you? I don't understand.

Pinkie was right! This is what I need!

[laughter]

I just can't have funny ideas.

I need to wander the land and see ponies laughing at them.

You can run the factory, but I need to LIVE!

And don't think I've forgotten about you, little buddy.

I knew you'd be on board!

Don't worry. Out in Equestria I'll have more great ideas

for gags and I'll send them all to you!

Sir, are you sure this is what you want to do?

Of course! It's my life's purpose!

Hey! That's what I came here looking for.

You did? Well, come on! Let's figure it out.

[laughter]

Actually... I think I'm good.

♪♪

And then I said goodbye and then I came here.

Oh, and then I gathered you all together

and started telling you about it. First, I said.

Well, that sounds like quite a trip!

And Cheese Sandwich just left his own factory?

Yep. But I think Sans Smirk's hooves

were the perfect ones to leave it in.

As much as Cheese was born to wander Equestria

and make ponies laugh in person,

Sans was born to run that factory.

And you don't so sound so worried

about finding your life's purpose anymore.

Nope! I figured out Cheese and I are pretty much the same.

We both need to see ponies laughing to feel fulfilled.

And I already do that.

My life is purposing itself all over the place!

I agree completely.

Thanks. Oh, I almost forgot.

I got you all a little something from my trip.

Who likes peanut brittle?

[explosion and squeals] [laughter]