Original subtitles

Dear Twilight, it is difficult to express how grateful I am

to you for teaching me the power of friendship.

[grunts]

You would think after more than a thousand years,

there would be nothing left to learn

[whistling wind]

And yet, even a pony as old as I can continue to be surprised

by how much there is to know.

♪♪

"I hope you find these postcards enjoyable

and I look forward to seeing you again,

though I can't say when my journey will be complete.

Your friend, Starswirl."

♪♪

It must be gratifying to have your idol writing to you

about the friendship lessons he's learning.

I'm not sure I'll ever get used to it.

Of course, if he really wants to learn about friendship,

he could just come to our school.

Professor Sparkle?

The Mail Pony just came with uh, a few things.

[door squeaks as it opens]

Oo! The sewing machines I ordered for my class!

These came, too.

I wasn't sure what to make of them.

These machines were costly,

but I am quite certain the friendship lessons

I can teach my students with them will be invaluable.

[Twilight sighs]

Don't worry, darling.

I'll think of something

and I didn't use school funds to buy these.

I made the purchase entirely with my own bits.

It's not that. It's this.

"Why waste your time at a friendship school

that's just a school?

Learn everything they teach and more at Friendship University!"

♪ My little pony, my little pony ♪

♪ Aaaahhh ♪

♪ My little Pony ♪

♪ I used to wonder what friendship could be. ♪

♪ My Little Pony ♪

♪ Until you all shared its magic with me. ♪

♪ Big adventure! ♪ ♪ Tons of fun ♪

♪ A beautiful heart! ♪ ♪ Faithful and strong! ♪

♪ Sharing kindness ♪ ♪ it's an easy feat ♪

♪ And magic makes it all complete! ♪

♪ To have my little pony ♪

♪ Do you know you're all my very best friends? ♪

♪♪

Who would open another friendship school?

I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.

You're the Princess of Friendship.

What could this other school possibly offer?

It isn't just another friendship school, it's a University!

It says they teach "the same lessons

of competing schools in half the time."

That's twice the learning!

And it's in Las Pegasus?

If Professor Rarity lets us skip her sewing class -- ROAD TRIP!

[excited chatter]

I think we need to look into this school.

I don't like to judge solely on appearances,

but what kind of friendship school is this?

Only the best friendship school in the West...

and maybe all of Equestria!

[excited shouts]

There's more ponies in here than at our whole school.

Who is running this place?

[Male voice] Welcome, friends.

You are about to embark on a journey of amazing magnitude,

one that will change your lives forever.

Prepare yourselves to embrace a new path

and become students of FRIENDSHIP U!

Flim and Flam. Of course.

♪ If you're alone and you can't make friends ♪

♪ we understand your plight ♪

♪ Until now there was just one way ♪

♪ your friendships could take flight ♪

♪ There is a school real far away ♪

♪ that'll teach you what to know ♪

♪ But if you live here you couldn't stay ♪

♪ you'd learn you have to go ♪

[sad sighs]

♪ Now there is an alternative to all of that adversity ♪

♪ Not just a school I'll have you know ♪

♪ But a whole University! ♪

♪ At Friendship U our aim is true ♪

♪ In a city not some backwater ♪

♪ You'll learn the things you need to know ♪

♪ At our new alma mater! ♪

That's it, everypony!

You heard correctly!

Friendship U, the one and only University of friendship!

♪ As you can see we're a success by any kind of stat ♪

♪ That may be so for all I know but I still smell a rat ♪

♪ Everypony lookie here that other school's headmare! ♪

♪ Her presence is a testament to the mutual respect we share

What? No it isn't!

♪ It really is the final piece to make our work complete ♪

♪ To have the Friendship Princess ♪

♪ bless our school is such a treat ♪

Were so honoured!

♪ At Friendship U we teach to you AND YOU! ♪

♪ All of our friendship knowledge ♪

♪ You'll learn it all in half the time ♪

♪ at the one and only friendship college ♪

But how can anypony learn friendship in half the time!

Our coursework is so accelerated

to take longer'd be a crime!

♪ The lessons that we teach ♪

♪ Have been reviewed and checked and edited ♪

♪ Which might explain why our school's about to be accredited ♪

♪ At Friendship U Oh yes, it's true ♪

♪ Even the Princess of Friendship agrees ♪

♪ The only place in Equestria to give out friendship degrees! ♪

Yeah!

Friendship U!

Friendship U!

Friendship U!

That's it, everypony!

Let's hear it!

Tell us again why it's the best!

♪ It's the only University of Friendship U! ♪

♪♪

Yeah!

Accredited?

It means officially recognized or authorized

We know what it means.

But who would accredit this place?

Why the EEA, of course!

Chancellor Neighsay?

The Equestria Educational Association has taken an

interest in institutions that teach friendship

in a pony-first environment.

Surely you didn't think your school

has a monopoly on the concept?

Well, she did write the book on it

Ah, yes.

"How to teach friendship to creatures

who will one day use it as a weapon against us."

How could they use friendship as a weapon?

You tell me; it's your book.

Meantime, this university appears to be a promising option

for ponies who'd prefer to stick to the EEA book on the subject.

You can't be serious.

They're obviously up to something.

It's Flim and Flam!

[indignant gasp]

Well, that certainly wasn't friendly.

One would think the headmare of a school of friendship,

albeit an unaccredited one, would behave differently.

Unless she was trying to undermine the competition? Hmm?

[gasp]

I... No... What? I am not!

I did think the Princess of Friendship would be friendlier.

Now, now fillies and gentlecolts,

let's show the Princess just how friendly we are

by signing up for some classes!

[excited chatter]

Why don't I show you around?

I'm sorry, but approval from the EEA won't convince me

that this school is what you promise.

And what would it take to convince you?

Well, somepony who's opinion I respect, for one.

Really? Somepony like this?

[gasp]

Twilight?

Uh oh.

Starswirl? What are you doing here?

Why, studying friendship at Flim and Flam's wonderful school!

Oh, please.

I think I know a disguise when I see one.

Take off that ridiculous beard!

FLAM!

[stretching sound]

[grunt of pain]

How's it going in here?

[stretching sound]

[snap]

It-it's really me.

I'd heard rumors you've returned,

but I didn't believe it until now.

And if a pony of your stature is studying here,

there really isn't anything else I need to see.

I, Chancellor Neighsay, hereby confer upon Friendship

University complete and unreserved EEA accreditation!

I-I don't understand.

Why would you come here and not my school?

My travels brought me to Las Pegasus.

I didn't come for the school,

but Flim and Flam convinced me to try it out.

[Twilight] You can't trust Flim and Flam!

They tried to con the Apples out of their farm!

They sold fake health tonic!

They run a resort in Las Pegasus!

Technically, our resort is a legitimate business.

I spent a thousand years

thinking the worst of a "bad" pony.

You taught me to look for the best in him.

Whatever Flim and Flam's past may be,

starting this school shows they want to change for the better.

I wish I could believe that.

Besides, what's untrustworthy

about opening a school of friendship?

They don't even charge for classes.

I don't know.

But I know they're up to something

and until I find out,

I'm begging you, come to my school instead.

I understand feeling threatened by competition.

But my word, Princess, I wonder if the ill-manners

of the creatures at your school aren't contagious.

I think I will take my leave before I become infected.

Twilight, I promise I'll visit your school soon,

but for now, perhaps it's best if you return there.

You don't think they're running an actual friendship school,

do you?

Darling, of course not.

Which is why we have to investigate!

But we can't go poking around the school.

Everypony'll think I'm still just

"threatened by the competition."

Only if we do it as ourselves.

[door opens and closes]

♪♪

In these disguises,

we could pass as students at out own school.

I don't know, Rarity.

Ah-ah. What did I say about using our real names?

[door opens]

Sorry, "Plainity." But I'm pretty sure this

isn't enough of a disguise.

[door closes]

Hey, strangers. Are you two new here?

We sure are. Completely new!

Great! See you in class!

[excited squeal]

Now, I've read enough Shadow Spade to know the key to going

undercover is rehearsing your backstory.

[ahem]

I'm "Plainity" and I love bland-old-normal stuff.

No frills for me.

OK, your turn.

[groan] My name's Eyepatch. I have an eyepatch.

Perfect!

Now, how do we start our investigation?

I think we should split up.

You enroll in some classes

and find out what they're actually teaching.

I'll look around and see what I can find,

assuming I'm not recognized.

Welcome, newest students!

Let's dive right in, shall we?

One of the most important elements of friendship

is being thoughtful, true or false?

[eager chatter]

If by thoughtful you mean generous, I'd say true.

Correct!

It was a trick question.

Very impressive, Ms...?

Plainity.

Well, well well, Ms. Plainity, keep it up and you'll be ready

for our next level in no time!

[impressed sighs]

Now, let's see if you can demonstrate for the class.

What's something generous you could do for me right now?

♪♪

Class, Plainity here is now my star pupil.

If any of you want a chance at studying with Starswirl,

I'd take notes on her every action.

Hello?

The door is open, so I'll just assume it's OK to come in

and look around, unless somepony says it's not.

All right, then.

"The Element of Laughter and its applications."

OK, that seems pretty genuine.

"When to support your friends' decisions

and when to talk sense."

Huh, that's actually kind of interesting.

Ah-ha! "Friendship University's true goal

is to help friends become better friends?"

Where is the proof that it's all a scam?

There isn't any...

[shutter click]

Twilight Sparkle!

Did you really think an eye patch was enough of a disguise?

No, I didn't!

Well, then we agree that everypony will recognize the

Princess of Friendship in this photo of you

sneaking into our office.

I can see the headline now, "Princess of Jealousy!

Twilight Sparkle bent on ruining her competition!"

So sad.

A news story like that would destroy your reputation.

Nopony will want to go to your school after that.

Just wait until the papers get a hold of this.

Princess Unhinged!

It'll be the talk of Equestria.

Well, gentleponies, I've finished another stack.

The lessons in these worksheets are quite fascinating.

Twilight? What's going on here?

Just your protégé getting caught snooping in our office

in disguise! Well, sort of.

Honestly, Princess Twilight, envy does not look good on you.

I'm not envious!

I know these two are up to something.

I'm just trying to find out what!

The only pony I see who's up to something is the pony

in this picture, and it is not the Princess I know.

Well, it's about to be the Princess all of Equestria knows.

Unless...

you decided to drop the whole, "uncover the scam" thing.

Then we'll rip this silly picture up and not let it

completely and utterly ruin you and your school.

[moan]

You can be generous with all sorts of things.

Gifts, compliments, your time.

[excited chatter]

Hey, Eyepatch!

Where's your eyepatch?

Was your cover blown?

You could say that.

Flim and Flam took a picture of me sneaking into their office.

Were we wearing our eye patch?

If I don't stop investigating, they're going to tell everypony

that I'm trying to sabotage their school

because I'm jealous.

But but but...

that's ridiculous!

I don't know.

Maybe I am just upset that Starswirl came here

instead of my school.

Flim and Flam may have turned over a new leaf.

We should probably just go home.

Twilight, you are not the kind of pony

to let your emotions cloud your judgement.

If you think Flim and Flam are up to no good,

you can't give up,

even if their lessons really are impressive.

Wait. WHAT?

Which reminds me. Can you get a message to Spike?

I want to return those sewing machines.

I need the bits if I'm going to keep advancing here.

Tuition's free, but the worksheets sure aren't.

Flim and Flam are charging for these?

Well, they have to cover expenses,

and Flam insists that everything extra

goes to improving the school and...

This is the scam, isn't it?

Let's find out!

These lessons are so valuable.

Are you sure I can't give you more?

Ah ah ah! Unnecessary!

Being able to share them with a pony like you

is our real reward.

Oh, my. And you want to study alongside Starswirl, hm?

It's all I have.

[rip]

Come back for the rest when you can afford it.

Wait! I'll sell the shirt off my back!

That's the kind of determination that'll get you

to the next level, student whose name I know!

Twilight, maybe I should take over the investigation.

Think of your reputation!

My reputation isn't worth much if I won't risk it

for what I think is right.

Besides, I have a plan.

♪♪

[door creaks]

♪♪

[slam]

♪♪

Well, brother of mine, we've got almost all the bits we need

to expand our resort.

If we add anther level of classes and worksheets,

we'll be there!

Maybe we should add two levels, just to be safe.

[beep and power up]

[splashing]

Ah! It's a thing of beauty.

But I was thinking,

what if we added another extreme pool slide here?

Sure, as long as the pipes for the musical chocolate fountain

go through here.

[Twilight] But shouldn't it go closer

to the pudding hot tub here?

Fair point, but-- WHAT?

I knew your school was a scam.

Well, well, well.

If it isn't the Princess of Jealousy.

I guess we'll be going to the papers after all.

And I suppose I'll just lead your students

into this secret room of bits and resort expansion plans!

Let's not get hasty.

You have something on us; we have something on you.

Let's just call it even.

I don't think so.

You can destroy my reputation if you want,

but using your students' bits to expand your resort is wrong,

even if the lessons you teach are good ones.

Of course, they're good.

We copied them from your book.

We just skipped every other page.

"All the lessons, half the time!"

Fine. If you really want to call it even,

give back the bits and stop charging for my lessons.

Then you can teach them as much as you like.

Nah! Running a school is more work than we thought.

Besides, we almost have everything we need.

I think not!

Plainity?

My star pupil?

Not Plainity, but...

Rarity!

Who?

We decided to bring somepony else here

to listen to everything you just said!

Hey! Starswirl. We were just about to--

Return the bits you've collected from

your students and close your school?

[gulp] Yeah. That.

♪♪

Ah, it seems I'll never stop learning

from your example, Twilight.

It is a valuable lesson to stand up for what you know is true.

I wish I had known it too.

Thanks for returning our bits,

but how are we going to learn about friendship now?

[disappointed murmurs]

Well, I can refer you to a fairly reputable establishment

just outside of Ponyville.

I'm quite certain the headmare would consider letting you in.

[giggled agreement]

[cheers]

"Of course, if I ever go to a school again,

I'll make sure it's yours. In friendship, Starswirl."

I still don't understand how Flim and Flam

could have gotten a copy of your book.

I finished straightening up in the library.

Professor Rarity, I just wanted to make sure

you're definitely keeping these.

But of course, darling.

If there's one thing I learned at Friendship University,

it is not to give up when you know what's right

and I know teaching friendship through sewing is right!

I just need to figure out how.