All language subtitles for 09.Brother.Ralph

With the stars...

and...

What say there,
Alice?

Oh, hi, Ed.

Where's Ralph?

He's not home yet.

Little late tonight,
ain't he?

Oh, well, I guess maybe he
just stopped off, you know,

with some of the boys
for a little celebration.

Celebration for what?

Oh, didn't you see
Ralph last night?

Oh, well, you know that
suggestion box they got
down at the bus depot?

Yeah.

Well, Ralph put a
suggestion in there

and the company
liked it very much.

They gave him a
$10 prize for it.

Hey, boy, I'm telling you,

I always knew that boy
had executive ability.

What was his suggestion, anyway?

Well, you know
how the traffic

gets sort of congested
on Madison Avenue

when, oh, maybe four
or five buses pull
up to the corner

at the same time?
Yeah.

Well, Ralph suggested
they bring in

a traffic expert to
work the problem out.

So, they hired one
this morning.

Boy, oh, boy,
I'm telling you, Alice,

you can be pretty proud
of that husband of yours.

I'm telling you, he's gonna
go far in that bus company.

You know why? 'Cause
his heart and soul is
in his work, that's why.

All he thinks about is buses.

He eats, drinks
and sleeps buses.

He's even built like one.

( laughing )

Oh, hiya, Ralph.

Hey, there,
Ralphie boy.

Put it there, pal.

Congratulations, there.

Alice just told me
the good news

about the suggestion you made
down there at the company.

Boy, I'm telling you, attaboy,

They didn't need an expert.

I could've told them
what the trouble was.

There's too many buses
on Madison Avenue, that's all.

Course, that traffic expert--
you know what he'll probably do?

Take some of the buses
off the line,

and just lay off
some of the bus drivers.

Course, that'll be pretty rough

on the bus drivers
that are laid off,

but, at a time like this, you
gotta think of yourself, Ralph.

I mean, think of how much
better off

you and the other drivers
will be that are working.

What's the good word,
buddy boy?

I... was the first to go.

Oh, Ralph.

You mean you were fired?

Oh, no, I wasn't fired.

I was just temporarily
laid off.

With nine other drivers.

How 'bout that?

How could they
do that to me?

Me, who has worked and drove
a bus for that company
for 15 years!

15 years,
driving a bus.

Aggravation, 101
aggravations every day!

Driving a bus
in the summertime,

dying from the heat,
in the wintertime,

freezing from the cold.
All kinds of weather.

Through the rain,
the snow and the sleet.

You know that sign
they have in the post office,

"The mail gets through
no matter what kind
of weather"?

You know why?

'Cause the mailman
rides with me, that's why!

Oh, Ralph, I know
how you feel, honey.

But we got to be
practical about this.

What are we gonna do?

I don't know what
we're gonna do.

How long's this
thing gonna last?

I don't know how long
it's gonna last.

A week, a month, a year,
who knows?

And I can't get a job either
in the meantime.

Remember the last time
I was laid off?

I tried to get a job,
they want references.

They want to know
where I worked last.

Then they call up
where I worked,

they find out I drive the bus,

that I'm on a layoff, and they
know that I'm going back

to driving a bus as soon
as the layoff's over.

So I can't get a job there.

Excuse me, may I interject
here for a moment?

Maybe I can be
of some help.

Maybe I could swing
a little influence,

and get you a job with me
down the sewer.

I don't know anything
about working in the sewer.

How about it, Ralphie?

Would you like to join us
denizens of the deep?

I told you, Norton,

I don't know anything
about working in a sewer.

Well, you'll pick it up,
you just learn, like I did.

I mean, after all, what
did I know about my job

before I joined the
Department of Sanitation?

I didn't even know a sewer
from a hole in the ground.

( laughs )

Come on, Ralph, will
you stop aggravating
yourself like this?

Doesn't do any good.
At a time like this,
you gotta smile!

You gotta smile!

What do you mean?
What have I got to smile about?

That's just the point.

Now more than ever before,
you gotta keep your spirits up.

It's easy to smile when
things are going good,

but now it's a challenge.

Come on, Ralphie boy, pal o'
mine, let's see the old smile!

Let's see those ivories.
Give me the old Liberace,
in there, Ralphie boy!

That's a boy!
Give me that smile there!

That's the way it is.

Beautiful, beautiful,
just stay like that.

Now, don't think of today,
think of happier times.

Think of yesterday, when
your boss brought you
in the office there

and he said,
"Ralph, I'm gonna
use your suggestion

about hiring a traffic expert
to solve the problems
on Madison Avenue."

You should be proud,
Ralphie boy!

That was your own idea.

Nobody else thought of that.

You hatched that right
out of your own brain.

Smile, smile...!

Get out!

Get out!

I take back my offer
to you of a job in the sewer.

Besides, you wouldn't even
fit through the manhole.

Get out!

Somewhere, Alice,

somewhere in
this world,

there is a straightjacket
waiting for that man.

Ralph, never mind him.

What are we gonna do?

What are we gonna live on
until this layoff is over?

Suppose it does
last a month?

Well, we just gotta face it.

Just have to cut down,
cut out this high living.

High living?

Yes, high living.

We'll just have to cut
out a few luxuries.

All right, how about you
giving up bowling?

Now, let's not get panicky.

Let's face this thing
intelligently.

There's just one
way to do it.

We gotta find out
how much money we owe,

and how much money we have.

Then we deduct
the money that we owe
from the money we have,

and the money we have left
is what we're gonna live on.

Now, where are the bills,
and I'll start fixing it up.

In the top drawer.

Very simple.

Nothing to get excited about.

Just remain calm.

Well, here,
that's $4.95.

Here.

( mumbling )

All right,
it comes to $186.32.

Now, that's what we owe.

We have to deduct that
from what we have.

Now, this is an emergency,
so we got to take into
consideration

all the money we have.

Whatever we have in war bonds,
whatever we have in the bank,

whatever you have
hidden around here.

All the money we got
in our Christmas club,

all of it, now all of that
lumped into one big ball,

amounts to what?

$12.83.

$12.83!

$12.83?

You sure that's
all of it?

That's right, Ralph,
that's all,

including three Indian head
pennies and a two-cent stamp.

You don't know how
to handle money.

Of course I don't!
I never had any practice.

You squandered it, Alice.

You squandered it.

Squandered?
Yeah, squandered.

I know what you do
when you got money, Alice.

I know what you do.

You run right out
and buy some clothes.

That's what you do.

I what?!
Don't deny it!
Don't deny it, Alice.

'Cause I got the proof
that you buy clothes.

Here, is this
middle drawer yours?

That's right.
Is it yours?

All right,
is it jammed with stuff?

Everything you bought?
Now...

is the bottom drawer mine?
That's right.

All right, in there
is one pair of pants.

Why is one pair of pants
of mine in that drawer?

'Cause one pair of your pants
is all that'll fit in there.

Oh, oh, bum!

Listen, Ralph,
I did not spend

that money on clothes,
and you know it.

Besides, how far do you
think $62 a week will go?

Will you shut your big mouth
and stop yelling my salary?

I don't want the neighbors
to know how much I'm making.

$62 a week.
$62 a week!

$62 a week!

Will you stop that?

I don't want my salary
to leak out.

Your salary
couldn't drip out.

Now, listen, Ralph...

Oh, you're flirting
with death.

You can rant and rave
and scream and yell

all you want to, but it's
not helping matters any.

Now, let's face it, Ralph,
we're in trouble.

What are we gonna live on
until this layoff is over?

You're so smart,
you tell me.

Ha.
All right.

I will tell you,
but you're not gonna like it.

Now, nobody's gonna
give you a job, Ralph.

Just like you said,
they'll find out when
the layoff is over

you're going back to work
for the bus company.

But there is no reason
in this whole earth

why I can't get a job.

That is out.

O-U-T, out.

While you are my wife,
you will never work.

I have my pride.

I'm gettin' a job, Ralph,
no matter what you say.

I'm not gonna argue
with you, Alice,

'cause first of all,
what could you possibly
do to earn any money?

Well, there's plenty
that I could do, Ralph.

I took a commercial
course in school.

I still remember
my shorthand and my typing.

I can get a job
as a secretary.

Oh, you can, huh?

And who do you think is
gonna do the housework
around here?

Guess.

Oh, no!

No, sir.

No, sir, sir,
sir, sir!

No, sir! Not me.

Oh, yes, you are, Ralph.

I'm getting a job, and you're
gonna do the housework.

( door slams )

Ha, ha, har-dy,
har, har!

Har, har,
har-dy, har, har!

You hear that, Alice?!

Har, har, har,
har, har-dy har!

Hi there, Ralph. I'm
glad to see you laughing!

Get out!
Smile!

Get out!

Oh, hiya, hon.

Oh, hiya, Ralph.

Oh, boy,
am I tired.

Oh, what a day I had.

Say, Ralph, would you rub
the back of my neck for me?

It feels like it's broken.

Sure, sweetie.

Oh, that feels good.

What're we having
for supper, Ralph?

Oh, I made some
spaghetti, lima beans,

mashed potatoes
and hot dogs.

Oh, no, Ralph,
not hot dogs again.

What do you mean,
"No, not hot dogs again"?

Nothing, Ralph, except
this is only the third time

in a week that we've had 'em.

Are you complaining, Alice?

Is that what you're doing,
complaining?

I suppose you'd like to have
a nice big, thick steak?

Well, now that
you mention it,

I would like a nice
big, thick steak.

How do you
expect me to get it

on the money you give me
to run this house?

Oh, never mind, Ralph.
Forget it.

I don't want to forget it.
I don't want to forget it.

Sure, it's easy for you
to come home,

crack... make criticisms
about the food.

Sure, but I've been slaving
over a hot stove all day.

All right, Ralph,
I'm sorry.

Let's not argue,
I'm too tired.

You're tired?

You're tired?

Well, what do you
think I am?

You've been sitting behind
a nice typewriter all day.

I've been scrubbing the
floors, mopping everything,

cleaning up,
washing, cooking.

Listen, Ralph,
I said I was sorry.

Now would you please hurry up
and get supper on the table.

I gotta go in
and change my clothes.

I have to go back
to work tonight.

Wait a minute.
What do you mean
you're going to work?

We're supposed to be
going to the movies.

I know, Ralph,
but I can't help it.

But I've had my heart set on
going to the movies all day.

Well, Ralph,
what can I do about it?

This is their busy time.

I got to make out
their inventory sheets.

What do I care
for their inventory sheets?

I want to go
to the movies!

Sure, sure, it's
all right for you,

you've been out all day.

I've been cooped up here
with nothing to look at
but these four walls.

Ralph, will you please be
reasonable about this?

I have to go back to work.

Now, I haven't got much time,

so please hurry up
with supper.

Tony's picking me up
and he'll be here any minute.

Tony's picking her up?

Who's Tony?

What'd you say, Ralph?

I said, who's Tony?

Tony? Oh, Tony's my boss,
Mr. Amico.

Oh, Tony's your boss, huh?

Mr. Amico.

Well, why don't you call
your boss Mr. Amico?

Why do you have
to say "Tony"?

Well, I don't know, Ralph.
That's just the way it is.

Everybody down at the office
calls everybody else
by their first name.

It's just Tony and George
and Bill and Frank
and Pete and Alice.

Tony, Frank and George,
Pete and Bill and Alice?

Aren't there any Muriels
down there or any Glorias?

Well, no, Ralph,
I'm the secretary.

I'm the only girl
in the office.

The only girl in
the whole office?

Yeah.

Boy.

You must be a riot
around that water cooler.

Listen, Ralph, I don't know what
you're building in your mind,

but you're
just being ridiculous.

Millions of girls work
in offices every day with men

and nobody thinks
a thing about it.

First of all, those guys
are all so busy,

they don't have time
to give me a second thought.

So I don't want to hear
another word about it.

Would you get me
my slippers, please?

I got to get some things.

Oh, Ralph. Ralph?

What do you want now?

I forgot to tell you something,
and it's very important.

I told Tony that I
lived with my brother.

You see, he doesn't
think I'm married,

so when he gets here tonight,
you just say you're my brother.

What?!

You said you
were not what,
and I'm who?

I couldn't very well tell them
that I was married.

They don't believe in
hiring married women.

It's an office rule.

And also that Frank, and
Bill and Pete and George,

they don't know you're
married, either?

Of course not.

See, they think if they hired
a married woman, you know,

she might leave
to raise a family

or a husband just might tell her
to quit or something.

Oh, they're so right.

You are quitting!

You are quitting.

And this isn't
your brother talking,
this is your husband.

Now, just a minute,
Ralph.

Don't "just a minute" me;
you're quitting.

You are quitting.

And when this Tony
comes here tonight,

we'll tell him, and then
he can go to the office,

and he can tell Frank
and George and Bill...

I am not leaving
that job, Ralph.

And I want to tell you
something--

I'm getting
pretty sick and tired

of these crazy,
jealous moods of yours.

I've been through them all
a hundred times

and for absolutely no reason.

What is the matter
with you, Ralph?

Don't you trust me?
You're my husband.

Oh, no, I'm your brother.

Listen, Ralph,
I am not quitting that job,

and for a very good reason:
we need the money.

Have you forgotten
the rent is due this week
and we haven't got a cent.

And I'm gonna tell you
something else, Ralph,

and boy, I want you
to get this straight.

You do anything tonight
with any of those crazy,
jealous scenes of yours,

and do anything that's
gonna cost me this job, Ralph,

and you will regret it
for the rest of your life.

Say, Ralphie boy.

Hey, come on, will you
snap out of it, Ralph?

I know how you feel.

I know this layoff
is tough to take.

I know just how you feel.

You probably just
can't wait to get behind
the wheel of a bus again.

I know it's just how you feel,
'cause I went through

the same thing
two or three years ago

when they laid me off
in the sewer.

I felt just like
a fish out of water.

It's not the
layoff, Norton.

It's that job
that Alice has got.

In order to get it,

she had to tell the boss
she wasn't married.

And on top of everything,

she told them that
I was her brother.

Well, if that's what
she had to say to get the job,
that's what she had to say.

Don't you understand
the implications of
a thing like that?

The boss doesn't think
she's married.

He's liable to try to
make a date with her
or something!

Now wait a minute, that won't
necessarily follow through.

Take my cousin, for instance.
She works.

Her boss knows she's single,

he don't try to
make no dates with her.

Course, she looks
like an orangutan.

Never mind your cousin,
Norton.

Suppose it was Trixie?

Suppose it was Trixie?

I tell you how I'd feel,
suppose it was Trixie.

See what this is?
I'll tell you what it is.

You know, Alice getting
the job gave Trixie an idea.

This here is an application
for a job that Trixie filled
out in this morning's paper.

I'm just on my way
down to mail it now.

You mean to tell me
that you don't care
whether Trixie works?

Of course not!

Course, I ain't the jealous
nature like you.

Ah, by the way,

what does Alice's boss
look like?

How do I know?
I never saw him.

Oh, boy, Ralph.

You are beautiful.

You're very attractive.

Yes, sir, you're building this
whole thing up in your mind.

You haven't even seen
Alice's boss,

yet you're building
a whole thing up in your mind.

You got any idea
what some bosses look like?

Geesh.

You ought to get a load
of my boss down in the sewer.

She is the ugliest woman
that ever lived.

Maybe you're right,
Norton.

Maybe I'm building
this whole thing up
in my mind.

Course I'm right.

Alice's boss is probably
90 years old,

bald, hasn't got
any teeth.

( both laugh )

Probably some
stupid moax.

Yeah.

( knock on door )

Hey, that's
probably him now.

I'm surprised he's got
the strength to knock.

( laughing )

Come in.

I'm Mr. Amico.
Is Alice ready yet?

( stammers )

I'll, uh, see
you later, Ralph.

I'm going upstairs
and destroy Trixie's
working papers.

So, uh...

you're Alice's
boss, huh?

That's right.

You must be Ralph,
Alice's brother.

Boy, Ralph, you've got
some sister there.

She's a real doll.

I'll be out
in a minute.

( Ralph and Alice yelling )

She's not ready yet.

See, it takes her a little
longer to put on her makeup.

She's not as pretty
as she looks.

All you brothers think
that way about your sisters.

But take it from me,
your sister is all right.

How about getting me
a date with her?

I think I'd better give
you this little piece
of information, pal.

My sister happens to be
going steady with
a prizefighter,

and he really hits.

That's just
a little warning.

Thanks.

You know, you and Alice
don't look very much alike

for a brother and sister.

There's very little
family resemblance.

Is that so?

Well, no offense,

but she's so, um...
mmm.

And you're so, um...

( Ralph yelling )

I'm all ready, Tony.

Alice, you certainly
are the prettiest
secretary in New York.

Ralph, your
sister's a doll.

Well, nice to
have met you.

Wait a minute,
I'm going with you.

Ralph.

( stammering )

I mean that I'm
going with ya

because I'm gonna wait
until she finishes,

and then I'll
bring her home

'cause it's not
good for a girl

to come home late at
night during these days.

Well, she won't be alone--
I'll be with her.

Uhh...

It's not safe for a girl
to come home these nights...

Ralph.

Ah, what I mean is,

why should Tony go to all
the trouble to bring you home?

You and I can hop on
the subway, we'll be home
in an hour and a half.

Oh, it's no trouble.

I've got my convertible.

I hope you won't be
too chilly, Alice.

I've got the top down.

I'm going with you,
and I'm bringing Norton.

Ralph!

Yes?

That will not
be necessary.

I will be perfectly
all right.

Well, I got
another idea.

Look, why don't you
work here tonight?

There's plenty of light
and everything.

Well, I don't
see why not.

I've got the portable
typewriter in the car,
and the papers.

I could bring them up.

You go right ahead
and do that, Tony, pal.

I'll be right
back, Alice.

All right.

All right, Ralph, how could you
embarrass me like that?

What's the matter with you?
Don't you trust me?

I trust you;
I don't trust him.

Now, you'll work right here
and everything'll be fine.

Listen, Ralph, I think
you've gone crazy.

I think you've gone
completely out of your mind.

These jealous moods of yours
are crazy, you know?

And just take
a little tip from me, Ralph,

I think you should
have your head examined.

You think that, Alice?

You think I should
have my head examined, huh?

I'll have it examined,
Alice, if you want.

Anywhere in the United States,
I'll have it examined.

Go to Vienna and
have it examined for you.

Vienna! Any doctor,
any place, any hospital.

They can bring doctors
from the Moon down here,

to examine my head!

And they'll find nothing
in there, Alice!

( clears throat )

Don't you think
it's a little late now?

Don't you think you ought to,
you know, call it off?

We won't be long now,
Ralph.

Uh, let me see
that last list

of figures I
gave you, Alice.

Types pretty nice,
doesn't she?

Ralph, will you stop
acting so crazy?

You're making me nervous.

I'm making you nervous?

What do you think
you're doing to me?

All right,
I'm going to bed now.

Go ahead and work.

But if I hear
the typewriter stop,
I'm coming out.

Your brother
certainly is, uh...

Yeah, he certainly is.

Here, take it
from letter "L."

All right.

I'm changing
the paper, Ralph.

( knock on door )

Come in.

Hi, Alice.

Oh, hiya, Freddie.

Ralph here?

He's in the bedroom.

I just come off my run.

I thought I'd drop by
and tell him the good news.

His layoff's over.
They're putting him

on a crosstown run
starting tomorrow.

Oh, that's wonderful,
Freddie. Thanks a lot.

I'll tell him
right away.

Tell him
I'll see him tomorrow.

Okay. Tony, I'll
just be a minute.

Ralph, what are
you gonna do?

All right, get up!

Get up!

Put your hands out
like that.

Okay, out!

Get out!

Out!

Go ahead, say it, Alice.
Say it.

Go ahead, tell
me I'm a maniac!

Go ahead,
say anything you want.

But I don't care.

I don't care,
that's the way I feel.

Oh, Ralph.

I love you.

You love me?

Yeah.

Why?

Don't you know why?

It's not every woman, Ralph,
who's lucky enough,

after 15 years
of marriage,

to have a husband
this jealous.

Baby, you're the greatest.