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Police! Police!

Well, he's got to come out some time.

- Benedictus Deus. - Benedictus Deus.

Benedictus Deus in Angelis et in Sanctis suis.

Benedictus Deus in Angelis et in Sanctis suis.

Well, my son.

Have you come to Mother Church at last?

Um, yes, Father.

To confess?

- Well... - I have the rest of the evening.

That ought to be long enough to hear even all your sins.

Um, yes, Father.

Well, for Satan! Have you nothing on your consience?

Um, no, Father.

Nothing that ticks, ticks, ticks?

No, Father.

Father, there is something worrying me a little.

I found this in the street.

- Hm, I suppose it grows there. - Yes, I meant to turn it in, but...

Where did you come from?

Oh, up there.

Where have you been?

Oh... in church.

- What were you doing there? - Hiding.

The police wanted me.

If you want to hide, you come down here and stay away from that nosy priest.

Padre Chevillon let me stay.

Oh, so now he's done you a favor. That's fine.

First thing you know he'll be putting fear of God into you.

But I was only there a minute.

Oh, well sometimes that's all those priests need, they're just that crafty.

A fine stool rat you'll turn out.

Pretty soon it'll be: "Please, Father, I'm sorry I stole,

please, Father, forgive me for my sins, blah, blah, blah."

Aren't you disgusted with yourself?

Well, here, get busy!

If you want to hide down here, you've got to work for it...

...not pray.

- Watch out below! - Ah, Comrade Gobin, how goes it?

Watch out, sewer man.

Comrade Gobin, huh?

- Whose comrade? - My neighbor.

Him?

He lives quite across the way from me, that's why I call him comrade.

And what does neighbor Gobin call you?

Oh, he doesn't speak to me.

Street washers never speak to sewer men, that's part of the social system.

CAF� HOLE IN THE SOCK

Don't you ever talk?

I didn't buy you two glasses of wine just to have you sit there.

You look at me as if I were a toad come up from the cellar.

Come on, let's dance.

You throw wine at my face!

To hell, you! You devil...

Oh, monsieur, I'm sorry!

You see what she did, that girl you sent over to entertain me?

Oh, monsieur, she didn't mean it. It was an accident.

An accident? Does it look as if she spilled the wine over me?

- Here, I'm sorry... - What's to be called you?

- You're scoundrels, thieves, swindlers! - Come, sit down, sit down, monsieur.

The police will hear about this.

You mustn't judge just by Diane? That one's always making trouble.

You'll see the rest of us know how to act like ladies.

The others I don't care to look at!

I'll make her apologize, fall on her knees to you.

- You'd like that, wouldn't you? - Does that save my suit?

Forty francs I paid for it, now look at it, all ruined.

No, madam, this is a case for the police.

You're not dealing with a nobody, I'll have you know I am a citizen of standing.

I'm going to have this place closed for good.

Come on, dance! Music!

I show you a perfectly nice man with money in his pocket...

...and ask you to help me.

What do you do? Throw wine in his face!

You heard what he said. He'll call the police.

They'll close this up.

That's what you want, isn't it?

You didn't like him because he kissed you, huh?

Well, do you imagine I've liked all the men who've kissed me?

And when I need you, you only make trouble for me.

Well, what do you think we're going to do now, starve?

Well...

I know what I'm going to do.

No! No! No!

No!

No!

Jacques! Jacques!

Come look, she's beating her!

Oh, can't they ever be quiet up there?

You know?

Some people wonder how I stand it down here all day long.

At least a man can hear himself think.

Take that! Here's another!

Now I'll show you what I'm gonna do with you!

Don't drop me! Dont drop me!

Sweet lady, now let's have a little reason here, will you promise?

- Yes, I promise anything! - Uh-huh, all right. Up!

If I ever catch you abusing that woman again,

I'll come after you wherever you are and I'll cut out your gizzard and fry it.

Now why did I do that for?

That's the young one from the Hole in the Sock.

Chico, you saved her life!

I don't know what for.

Treat you like that, it would be better for everyone if she were dead.

- What about supper? - Oh, supper, yes!

Come here, I'll show you something!

Oh, truffles!

Hey, hey, boy...

Onion, eh?

Champagne!

Oh, come on, leave her alone, let's eat!

Oui.

You can't lie there like a brown rat and spoil our supper.

Come along, get up there.

Up we go.

There.

Here.

You aren't dead.

Unless you keep thinking you're dead, then you are dead.

You wouldn't understand that, Boul, but it's true, I've proved it to myself.

One day you'll blow up from too much thinking.

That's what makes me a very remarkable fellow.

- That's why I'm an atheist. - Shh, please, please, Chico!

Don't start that all over again.

What have you to be afraid of, it's me that's the atheist.

You have no reasons to be an atheist. What made you one, anyway?

Oh... everything. Women like that.

Well, anyone can make a mistake.

Chico, why don't you give religion a chance?

- I have. - Have you ever prayed?

Prayed?

I have prayed so long and so loud...

...that even if God was deaf, he must have heard me.

God couldn't ask for a fairer test than the one I gave him.

A test? What kind of a test?

You know my one ambition to be a street washer.

Yes.

To carry the hose like Gobin up here among the people in the sunshine.

- Yeah. - Well,

I went to the cathedral itself,

I bought the largest candle they had for six francs.

- Six francs? - Hm.

And what happens? Nothing.

And then I said, perhaps God, if there is any,

meant me for a sewer man, I'm enough of a philosopher to understand that.

So... then I wanted another thing.

I lit another candle, another six francs... - Six francs?

Oh, what was that for?

Oh... I wanted a wife with yellow hair.

No, not just the kind of a wife most men put up with,

I wanted a fine, brave beautiful woman.

Well, a remarkable fellow like me has got to have a remarkable woman for a wife.

So...

Well, almost as remarkable anyway.

Well, that is asking God for a whole lot.

Well, that's what I prayed for.

I prayed and I prayed till I sweat and nothing turned up.

Only women I see are things like that.

And God owes me twelve francs.

And now perhaps you can understand why I'm an atheist!

Chico, please, please, not so loud!

Do you think I'd pray for something that doesn't exist?

Well, anyway, I wouldn't take a chance if I were you.

Well, I...

Do you know what I'll do just to prove to you how afraid I am?

- What? - I'll walk right in that church with you...

...and I'll dare God to strike me dead.

Not with me you wouldn't, no, no...

Here.

I'll go alone. You can stay at the door and watch.

- I wouldn't be any place near you. - Go on, Chico, go on, I'll watch you.

- All right. - Chico, don't!

Chico... Chico!

Well, come on if you wanna hear me.

Hey, Chico! Chico!

Not now! Look...

Are you looking for me?

- No! - He was.

It's nothing to do with you, citizen priest, it was just a little matter between me and...

He was going to ask God to strike him dead with a thunderbolt.

- He's an atheist. - An atheist? Really?

Welcome, my boy, I'm delighted to meet you.

- Huh? - Ever since they ordained me,

I've been itching to get my hands on a really thoroughgoing atheist.

You are a real thoroughgoing one, aren't you?

- Certainly I am. - Good.

Ordinary everyday sinners I can get by the hundred,

but real atheists are scarce. Come on, let's go and discuss this matter.

No, you're right. In there it wouldn't be fair.

We should be on neutral ground.

This is a good place.

There isn't any God, that's what you believe, isn't it?

All right, we'll start from there.

Now, in the first place, I...

Why have we here?

Father, this is one of the girls from over there.

Yes, I heard about her. That's what I came back for.

Your sister was beating you, wasn't she?

Her sister? There's something for your god to explain.

And you must be Chico, who saved her.

Chico, is protecting people in trouble part of your atheism?

Oh, I'm always doing things I don't want to do.

- Like being an atheist? - Yes.

No! No!

Look out, Chico, these priests are clever as sin.

My son, that's exactly as clever as we have to be.

As clever as sin.

Now tell me, what's your quarrel with God?

Did you ask him for something you didn't get?

Is that why you're an atheist? I asked for nothing in this world, citizen.

Now, now, Chico, you shouldn't lie to a priest.

- It's true, I want nothing. - Don't pay any attention to him, Father.

He prayed for two things and he prayed very hard.

- And what were they? - Alright, Boul!

First of all he wanted a hose. A hose.

- He wants to be a street washer. - Oh, that's easy.

The hose is yours.

What?

For your street washing.

Take this card to the Commissioner Chief.

You see, God heard your prayer after all.

Now, just to keep the account straight, I'm going to ask you to do something for me.

What account?

The account between you and God of which I'm the bookkeeper.

All I want you to do is keep these two medals of St. John and St. Agnes.

Religious medals?

They will protect you from danger.

Wait a minute now, you understand I'm still an atheist.

Well, technically perhaps.

But it has become a very complicated matter.

I shall have to take it up with my superiors.

Now, what are we going to do about you, my poor girl?

Oh, don't worry about her,

she'll be over there with the rest of them in a little while.

Obviously it would be a sin to leave you in the hands of an atheist.

Even a halfway atheist.

Now look here, I'll have you know I'm not halfway.

Still, you must admit, citizen street washer,

...now we are under a certain obligation to God.

Oh, now, that's nothing but trickery.

Yes, my girl, I think I can save you and trust you to the care of this...

...former atheist.

You see, Chico, God has a sense of humor. And the joke is on you.

Good night.

- Good night. - Good night, Father.

Good night.

Former atheist?

You know, these priests, they can do the strangest things with words.

You understand what they are saying when they are saying it.

But when they are through, they are through.

But... but, what about the card?

Oh... um...

It says, "Dear Commissioner,"

"I am asking you the favor that you promised me."

Arrange to have..."

It sounds all right.

But... it can happen as easily as that?

Do you realize what this means? I'm a street washer.

I have risen.

Didn't I tell you what God can do? It's a miracle!

Now don't you start talking like that priest.

It's a miracle. If anything good happens, it's a miracle.

If anything bad happens, we just don't mention it.

It's a miracle.

It's a miracle.

It is strange, though.

A moment ago I was nothing.

And now I'm a man of position.

Here... here...

Look, that's real silver.

See? Now wait... the price tag.

Twelve francs.

Twelve francs!

That's what he paid for the candles.

Now God doesn't owe you anything.

Oh, you think I'm scared just by tricks like that.

That was just a coincidence to fool me.

Now please, Chico, don't start that all over again.

- Let's have a drink. - Yes, but don't talk like this...

Hey, Chico. Chico, look.

We cannot leave her like that. You know Father Chevillon said that...

Forget what he said! Come on, let's celebrate.

To be sure, let's just have a great time!

- Here, stop that! Give me that! - No!

- Give me that, you little... - No!

You really meant to do it.

- Give it back to me! - Oh, I'd like that! My knive!

- Why'd you take my knife for? - You can't stop me.

I'll go to the Seine.

Alright, go ahead, jump in the river, drown yourself.

Lie in the morgue with a rope around your head, see if I care.

Look at me, I'm still shaking all over.

- Where are you going? - Oh, leave me alone!

I will, I'm not stopping you. There's the road to the river.

It's none of my affair what you do, go on.

Why do you want to take your life?

I've had enough of it.

Wait a minute.

Is that woman really your sister?

- Yes. - Well...

Why don't you run away from her?

Run away? Where?

I don't know, any place would be better than where you are.

There must be some things you can do. Get a job.

You could find some young man who... who...

Would marry me?

No man would ever marry me.

What makes you think that?

My sister always told me that.

She's right.

- But you don't like it in there. - No.

Then if you don't like it, you're not bad.

Why?

Well, I don't know why, but I know.

You see, when you say you don't like it, that makes all the difference.

Now, I'm a sewer man.

That's as near to nothing as a man can be.

But I am not nothing. I'm a very remarkable fellow.

All my life in the sewer has never made me feel low.

Why, sometimes I feel like a king... for no reason at all.

What's your name?

Diane.

My name's Chico.

It's more like a noise than a name, but...

See, I never had a real name because I never had a father.

- There's no one you're afraid of? - Uh-uh. No one.

Some day you get up and fight your sister.

She's just a coward like all snakes. Then you'll be free!

You'll be yourself.

Myself?

What would that be... myself?

A fine, brave, good girl.

Oh, there I go, there I go!

I'll be having you on my hands here if I don't look out..

You can go. I'm not keeping you.

No, I didn't mean that...

Chico's your friend, mademoiselle.

My friend?

I know I'll regret it, but I just can't help it.

Oh, please don't say things to me you don't mean.

I do mean them.

That's the worse of it, they just come out, I can't stop them.

There's the girl the man made the complaint about.

- Well, why don't you take her? - I will. Come on, get in.

Hey, hey, hey, don't run away!

- Pick me up over there. - Oui, sergent.

You're not to be afraid, do you understand?

- You work in there? - No.

I didn't ask you. What's your occupation?

- Where do you work? - I have no work.

- Come along. - You can't arrest her.

- Why not? - Well, because... just because.

- Come along. - Now wait a minute!

- I'm beginning to get annoyed with you. - You can't take her to jail.

Why not? She's one of the girls from the Hole in the Sock, isn't she?

You'd better be careful what you say about her!

Yes, you'd better be careful because she's my wife.

Funny you didn't say that at first.

- Where do you live? - 48, Rue Notre Dame de Loreto.

- What's your name? - Chico.

You'd better be telling the truth.

I won't forget to come to your house...

...and make sure you are.

- Now why did I say that? - Don't worry.

- I'll go away. - But you can't!

They'll look it up in the books and they won't find any record.

And then they'll come to my address and find I have no wife.

Oh...

Well, I'm finished. I'll lose the hose. The hose I...

Oh, what have I done?

Perhaps you could let me stay with you until the police do come...

...to prove to them you had a wife.

- Then I would go away and not trouble you. - No, no, no.

Our marriage wouldn't be on the records.

You can say we were married in Italy or Belgium.

No, no...

Why, that's an idea, that.

You have a great head.

You have a great heart.

Hey, stop that!

Come on.

Does that little bit make you tired?

There's a long way to go.

This is the first time I ever walked up these stairs.

I always run right up to the top.

I hate people who crawl around stairs and things, don't you?

Yes, only tonight I'm afraid I am tired.

Well, you want me to carry you?

- Oh, no. - Come on.

Well, if you can't walk, I guess I'll have to carry you.

No, I'm all right. I only stumbled.

See?

You know, there's something about you that gives me a little hope for you.

- Good evening, Chico. - Good evening.

Good evening, mademoiselle. - Good evening, comrade.

We won't be seeing you tonight at the caf�, eh, Chico?

- Oh, I don't know why not. - He doesn't know why not, ha!

You see what might happen? You see, I might have been carrying you,

that would have made a pretty picture, wouldn't it?

Is there any end to my madness tonight? Come on.

Monsieur Duchamps is very violent tonight.

Some day, Madame Frisson, you're going to meet with an accident,

a hatpin through the keyhole or something.

Chico, Chico, what have we got here?

I'll thank you to mind your own business, you old buzzard.

Wait till the house hears this. The women will die with envy.

Madame de Bonlieu, listen!

Chico, he has brought a chicken for his roost.

What kind of a...

Oh, come on, don't pay any attention to that evil one.

She rides on a broomstick at night. Come on.

Mind that bumble step.

Come on, I'll show you something.

Look.

When you work in the sewer all day...

...at night you want to be as close to the stars as you can.

There's my back door.

Look out below!

Come on, come on, I'll show you.

What's the matter? Don't tell me you're going to be afraid again.

Come on, come on, come on.

No, no, you must never look down. Always look up!

Now there's one more thing in the world you're in fear of.

You should have walked right out before you thought.

Now what's the matter?

Oh, Grissette!

She's one of Aristide's cats.

Don't tell me you're afraid of catsie?

Watch.

Boo! See?

She came over to see what was going on, then she she'll go back and tell Aristide.

See? Look.

I should go over and see Aristide.

He told me last night that today would bring me luck.

Well, what do you think of it?

Why, this is heaven.

Well, now look here.

You're not taking this thing seriously, are you?

You know I just brought you up here just because I had to.

Yes.

- You're not going to take advantage of me? - Oh, no, I won't do that.

Diane.

Well, there's the bed.

Come in, Chico.

Hello, Aristide.

Could I sleep here tonight?

Already she's driven you out of your home.

Isn't that warning enough?

I suppose Grissette told you about the girl, huh?

Well...

...there may be some truth in your stars, but your cats I can't stomach.

Good morning, comrade Gobin.

I've a card here... with writing in there.

Comrade street washer, my congratulations.

Thank you, comrade.

Well, colleague, it seems we're neighbors too.

- We must see something of each other. - Oh, by all means.

- I want you to know my wife. - Oh, I'd be honored.

Marie, I want to present to you our neighbor, citizen street washer Chico.

- Madame Gobin. - Monsieur Chico.

We must see something of each other.

- You and Madam Chico. - Oh, Diane!

Diane, come over here, I want to present you to our neighbors.

Madam Chico suffers from dizzy spells.

She's afraid she might fall.

Imagine falling?

- How do you do, Madame Chico? - How do you do?

Well, Chico, we should be on our way to work, eh?

Will you allow me to accompany you to the office of the Commissioner of Sanitation?

That would be a pleasure. I'll meet you downtairs.

In five minutes, comrade.

- Ah, good morning. - Good morning.

Where's my hat?

What's that I smell?

It's some of your good cooking, hm?

If you think you can reach Chico's heart through his stomach, you're wrong.

I wouldn't have called to you if I knew you were going to act that way.

Oh, I'm sorry, just to look at the plank it took my breath away.

All right, all right.

If you make up your mind to be afraid, then you'll stay that way.

Do you realize what I did, saying you were Madame Chico?

- Why did you? - Well, I...

Because I'm always doing things I don't want to do.

Naturally when the police comes, they'll ask around...

I suppose you didn't think of that, huh?

Hey... what are you doing here?

Look, I can do that!

What do you...

Um... Well, um...

Here, you'll need something for some food.

One, two... there.

Well, as long as I've got to have you around here for a few days,

it's a comfort to know that you're a good cook.

Goodbye.

Would you like to start from this end of the street, comrade?

- Whatever you say, comrade. - The pressure is better from this hydrant.

We'd better start from here.

Good morning, comrade Gobin. Good morning, comrade Chico.

Good morning, sewer rat.

You see, comrade, just one turn.

Just one turn, I understand, comrade, thank you.

If you're in any trouble, I'll be just around the corner.

And mind you, don't take any nonsense from these sewer men.

Now let's see. He said one turn, like that.

- You made a mistake, Chico. - Yeah.

Scat! I can't abide those cats!

Last night they yowled I could scarcely sleep.

Chico says it's because the moon is full.

- Didn't they keep the two of you awake? - No.

At least I don't think so.

Chico is such a friend of Aristide.

I should think he'd speak to him about the cats.

Maybe he has.

Last night he was over there till after midnight.

What time did he get back?

Not until late.

- Well, don't you mind? - No, not if he wants to.

There isn't anything he would do that I'd mind.

Well... I suppose there are all kinds of wedding nights.

There is somebody at my door.

Maybe it's Chico coming home.

- Hm, Madame Chico, huh? - Yes.

That will be all, madame.

I will not trouble you anymore.

Certainly not to the extent of climbing up seven flights of stairs.

Good day, madame.

Good day, monsieur.

Diane!

- Hey, Diane! - Madame Chico, Madame Chico!

I bring you your triumphant husband.

- After you, comrade. - After you, comrade.

Thank you, comrade.

Oh, Madame Chico!

I have the honor to inform you that your husband passed his probation in every test.

- With honors. - And on my very first day too. Here.

It was three days before I passed mine.

Oh, no, no, in your case the inspector was less lenient.

Oh, the meanest man in the service I'll admit.

But that didn't detract from your triumph.

Pretty nice compliment he paid me, wasn't it?

Oh, beautiful, beautiful. Tell them, tell them what he said.

Well, he said my alley was clean enough to eat off.

You two wouldn't by any chance have been celebrating, would you?

Oh, a few glasses of wine, but that's nothing to how we're going to celebrate tonight.

Now look, you and Madame Gobin come back here to dinner.

- Oh, but... - Oh, I'll get some more food, more wine.

We'll be delighted, comrade.

Perhaps I'd better go with Chico and help him buy the wine.

Oh, no, one of you is enough. You come along and take off those wet pants.

Let Chico take his off.

Come along, come along!

- I'll see you in a few minutes. - In a few minutes, comrade.

Oh, I have a clean one.

You don't seem very impressed.

You think it's every street washer that makes a start like that?

Oh, no.

You're going to know what to do tonight, how to act like a good wife?

Yes.

Well, what have you been up to today?

Nothing.

Did nobody come here?

Well, what's the matter with you? I just asked if anybody came here,

any visitors or anything?

No.

- No one. - Good.

Well, I won't be long.

Do you need any...?

Oh now, we're going to have a party, couldn't you look a little more cheerful?

Here. Here, stick that in your hair, it'll make you look beautiful.

You mustn't be frightened by Grisette.

- Come here, Grisette, dear. - I'm not...

She jumped there so suddenly.

Her curiosity gets the best of her sometimes.

She wondered what you were doing...

...at the mirror.

It's nothing very strange, my dear.

Women always make themselves beautiful when they wish to...

please a man...

...or deceive him.

What do you mean by that?

Grissette and I like to make jokes together.

What would you have to deceive Chico about?

He knows what you are, where you came from.

- I wish you'd go away. - Presently I shall.

Out of the kindness of his heart, Chico has let you stay here until the police come.

That was the understanding, wasn't it?

And you promised you would not take advantage of him.

I haven't.

When do you think the police will come?

I don't know.

Perhaps they won't come at all, is that what you've hoped?

- No. - Or perhaps they've already been here.

No

Perhaps they were here today just before Chico came.

Just now he asked you if they had been here and you said no.

How did you know the police came?

That doesn't matter.

What matters is that now you can bind yourself to him.

Drag him down, rob him forever of the greatness that he might have known.

Is that your plan?

Come on now, open the door for citizen street washer Chico!

Diane!

Diane!

Comrade Gobin!

- Is Diane here? - Why, no.

Well, where is she?

Why... I don't know.

I saw Monsieur Aristide talking to her just a while ago.

Where's Diane?

The police came today, there was no further reason for her to stay.

- Where did she go? - Where would she be likely to go?

You ought to be able to guess that.

I've been trying to finish your horoscope.

- The oblique ascension conversing to... - Will you tell me where she's gone?

which is being approached by a progressive climb from Mars...

Enough of your stars!

How much of this stuff does it take to make you smile?

I don't know, I've never had it before.

Well...

Why take tonight to experiment?

Shall we dance?

Come on, Diane.

- Do you hear me, I said come on! - Wait a minute!

Sit down and be quiet.

Hey, why should I sit down and be quiet?

Here! Here! What do you think you're doing?

Get out of the way, you filth!

Why did you run away, will you tell me that?

Weren't you happy? What is the matter with you anyway?

I lied to you, Chico. I didn't tell you the police came.

I wasn't going to take advantage of you.

Oh, please let me go. You're going to be something.

- I'll only drag you down. - Nobody can drag me down.

I'm wicked, just as Aristide said.

As Aristide said?

And I said that you were good, do you understand that?

Chico said you're a fine, good girl and therefore you must be one.

Fine wife you are.

Do you realize we have guests waiting? They must have given up and gone home.

- Chico, are you taking me home? - Well, where do you think?

Now will you stop that blubbering, or you're gonna disgrace me all evening.

ARMIES OF LAND AND SEA GENERAL MOBILIZATION ORDER

- Voici votre ordre de mobilization, Jean. - Ce matin?

C'est vraiement triste cet affaire l�, franchement.

- Monsieur Xavier Ragni�re? - I'm his wife.

Forward march!

- Oh, will you be quiet! - March!

Hey, down there!

- Here's a letter for you. - For me?

Don't be silly, who'd write me a letter?

The President of France.

Monsieur Gobin, I've got something for you too.

Hm, they're not joking then about this war.

- Hey, where's mine? - There's nothing for you, Chico.

Well, why not, they can't start this war without me.

Go on there, look through those things again.

Nothing.

Well, I suppose they don't want to risk losing a good street washer,

but they ought to realize that I could show them a few things about soldiering too.

You'll have to finish up alone this morning.

This doesn't give me much time. I'll have to hurry.

That's alright, comrade, you go right ahead. I'll tend to everything.

- Will you take care of my wheel barrel? - I'll do that,

and I'll see you at the house before you go.

Thank you, comrade, thank you.

What does he want with me? War is for heroes.

Oh, they'll probably scare out some sewer rats in Berlin for you to fight.

- Hello. - Hello.

You know what I've got in there?

No, what is it?

It's, um...

It's...

Oh, it's nothing. Just something I saw in a store.

Did you hear about Gobin this morning?

No.

Chico, what's in the box?

Well, I guess they're sleeping off last night's party.

What time was it when they went home anyway?

About three o'clock.

Well, why don't you open the box, it's for you.

For me?

Chico... it's a wedding dress!

You give me everything.

And I have nothing to give you.

Nothing.

No, no, no. Now, you mustn't do those things!

- You really want to marry me? - Yes.

Why?

I don't know.

- You don't have to. - Oh, I know that.

You're so strange. Unlike anyone.

Hm-hmm, that's true.

There's nobody like me.

I'm a very remarkable fellow.

Yes.

But... I don't understand.

- You say you'll marry me and... and you... - Well, what's the matter?

Chico... won't you say something?

Say something? What?

Just one word of love.

To tell me you're not marrying me out of pity.

You mean you want me to make love to you?

Yes.

Oh, I...

I feel so silly.

Well, I'll do it just once and no more.

Come here.

Well, you're... you're, um...

You know.

No. Well...

Before, there was Chico and there was Diane and now there's us.

- Us? - Uh-huh.

- You see, it's nothing but arithmetic. - Arithmetic?

Arithmetic, yes, because you and I are one,

so one and one makes one. Understand?

No.

Well, you asked me to make love to you and look what happens.

Well, this way then.

Chico... Diane...

Heaven.

Say it again.

Chico, Diane, heaven.

Say it again.

Chico... Diane... No, no, stop that!

It's true. There is a heaven.

And it's you.

Well... anyway, I'm a very remarkable fellow.

- Oh, yes. - Oh, you've noticed that too?

- Oh, yes. - Yes...

Oh, it's... it's wonderful the things I feel and the thoughts I think.

Why, sometimes I could reach out and touch a star.

Well, this is no time to waste mooning,

how do you ever expect to be ready by 2 o'clock?

- Ready? - Ready, 2 o'clock,

that's when we're going to be married.

- Married? - Uh-huh, I have to get shaved...

and dressed, you have to get that thing on.

Madame Chico!

I'm going to be something at last.

Be something?

You're going to be my wife.

Oh, Chico, you wanted so much to have a remarkable woman for your wife.

And now look.

Oh, she'd probably turn out to be a nuisance anyway.

I won't be a nuisance, Chico, ever.

Come in.

- Well, here I am. - Oh, it's you huh?

Is that all you have to say to me after I just walked up seven flights of stairs?

The sewer rat told me that I've got to be here right away.

Here I am, what's it all about?

How long will it take you to get Eloise all polished up and ready to go?

- Eloise is always ready to go. - Good.

Alright, now you and Eloise be right here promptly at 2 o'clock.

And if you think she can stand the excitement,

you can tell her that she's going to take Chico and his bride to be married.

Of course Eloise and I will take you to your happiness!

My girl!

He's not as foolish as he looks.

And allow me, on an occasion like that...

to present the bridegroom with a little gift.

A golden watch and a golden chain. Fourteen carats and 23 jewels.

Oh, no Boul, I couldn't accept such a valuable present.

Take it, take it, it cost me very little. It cost me nothing.

And as a present to madame, I think I know a place...

...where I can lay my finger on something very beautiful.

- Stay and have a drink with us! - Oh, no, oh, no!

Upon occasions like that, I get myself shaved,

I put on a clean shirt, and I light up a candle to St. Anton.

For the happiness, prosperity, good health...

...and a large family of M. and Mme. Chico.

Au revoir, my children, au revoir!

You like it?

Well, what are you going to do about get your dress on?

- Oh, I'll get Mme. Gobin to help me - Alright, alright.

But you'll have to wait till I'm finished shaving so I can take you across the plank.

No, you don't have to. I can do it.

- It isn't safe. - I'm not afraid.

Oh, brave now, huh?

- Chico! - Huh?

- I shall never be afraid again. - Well, that's the idea.

Well!

- You know something? - What?

You're a very sweet morsel.

And you know something else?

I didn't know it, but...

...a man's not complete without a wife.

My wife.

Oh, say it again.

My wife.

Oh, go on now, get that dress on. Go on, hurry up!

Madame, Gobin!

Come in, Diane.

Madame Gobin...

Oh, I'm sorry, I should... I shouldn't bother you now.

Come in, come in, we've said our goodbyes.

You just be thankful that Chico doesn't have to go.

That's because it's not in his stars. Aristide told him.

See? You should have let Aristide read your horoscope.

Oh, I've got trouble enough.

Diane!

- Diane, listen. - Yes?

- I love you. - Oh, at last!

You said it all by yourself.

I'm not used to being happy. It's funny, isn't it?

Hold me close.

No, closer.

Come in.

Well, what is it?

The postman left this for you this morning, Chico.

Well?

That's all, that's all!

Old busybody!

Chico, what... what is it?

No!

No, it can't be!

Even this morning with Gobin and everyone else getting one of them, I...

I couldn't believe it would happen to me.

What's the matter with me? I'm all wobbly inside.

Oh, Diane... don't ever go away, or like a candle, I shall just go out.

Can't you feel me shaking?

- Diane... I'm afraid. - Afraid?

Oh, how can I leave you now? Already you're a part of me.

Afraid. Oh, shame, Chico!

Courage, that's the idea.

Yes, yes, I said that, how easy it is to talk.

Then lean on me.

Trust me, for I will make you brave.

I'll be beautiful for you, and strong for you, and wise for you.

Never again will I be afraid.

I find it strange myself, but I am.

See what you've made of me?

I too am a very remarkable fellow.

I've got to report at 11 o'clock and...

...I must know that you're my wife.

Diane... do you believe in God?

Yes. Since he brought you to me.

Oh, if only I believed in Him.

- Do you want to, Chico? - Yes, I do.

Well, isn't that enough, you wanting to believe in him?

You see, something kept me from throwing them away.

We'll marry ourselves with these.

I'm an atheist, but I must appeal to something.

I'll give him one more test.

Dear God.

Perhaps you are here, perhaps not.

Perhaps you'd give me this wife,

perhaps not.

But if there is any truth in the idea of you,

oh, God, please make this a true marriage.

I take you Diane for my wife.

I take you Chico for mu husband... forever

Chico, kiss the bride.

- Now I go. - And I'm not afraid.

No, I don't want you to go with me.

- I'll go with Gobin. Don't follow me. - But I...

Diane, listen to me.

I will come to you every morning at this hour.

I promise that each day you'll feel me with you.

Now, don't move.

Don't move.

I just want to see you last like this.

Fill my eyes with you.

Goodbye, heaven.

Goodbye... Chico.

I've been hiding in the hall until your sewer man got out.

- Nana! - Well?

Why don't you ask me how I enjoyed being in jail?

What do you want?

What do I want?

I've come to take you home.

And this time you're going to do as I tell you.

No. I am going to stay here, in Chico's place.

- It will keep me near him. - Chico?

Oh, Chico!

The war has got him.

What's this thing?

Something he gave you, hm?

Give it back to me! Give it back, I tell you!

I'm not afraid of you, Nana.

- No? - I'm not afraid.

I'm not afraid!

You can never frighten me again, Nana!

Chico!

Chico!

Chico!

I am brave!

Chico...

Diane...

Heaven.

Chico...

Diane...

Heaven.

Oh, come here.

He's just coming out of ether, stay with him, don't leave him...

...under any circumstances.

You must be quiet.

- Who are you? - Hm?

- What's your name? - Diane.

- Do you live here? - No.

Where did you come from?

We call it heaven.

- Oh, you must be one of the angels. - Oh, no, monsieur, I'm a laundress.

Laundress?

Do they do washing up here?

Oh, no, we work in the basement.

Is there a basement to heaven?

Pardon, monsieur, you're not dead.

- I'm not dead? - You're in a hospital in Paris.

- I'm alive too. - You?

- I guess you are alive, aren't you? - Oh, yes, monsieur.

And you must rest now and get well.

You will get well, won't you, monsieur?

Yes, I will... if there are angels like you down here.

It's the first time we've eaten in three years and they annoy us like that.

Look, it's him, up there! Telling them where we are.

Any other day but today.

As if you could hit him from here.

Makes me feel better anyway.

Look! Look! Look!

It's not possible!

There they go again. Drill inspection and off to the front.

What is it this time?

- Don't you want your share? - Leave him alone, it's 11 o'clock.

Chico...

Diane...

Heaven.

Chico...

Diane...

Heaven.

- Diane! - Good morning, Monsieur Brissac.

Diane, wait!

Come here.

What happens every day at 11 o'clock that always makes you look so happy?

That's when I'm in heaven.

Then you admit you are an angel.

Now, what is it really?

Every day at 11 o'clock my husband comes to me.

- All the way from the front? - Hm-hmm.

I ought to laugh at you, but... somehow I can't.

You've a very kind heart.

No, I haven't, I have a diabolic heart.

Oh, Monsieur Brissac, you cannot have a heart like that.

I'll show you.

How do you know your husband comes to you exactly at 11 o'clock?

I just know.

Maybe he's lost his watch, or it's fast, or slow.

Then he'd come to you at some other time and you wouldn't know it.

I don't know. but every day since he went to war,

...at 11 o'clock he's been with me.

He must be a very remarkable fellow.

Oh, yes, everyone knows that.

- Goodbye, I must go back to work. - Diane, wait, I wanted to talk to you...

What are you looking for?

I thought all these German dugouts had pianos in them.

Do you suppose they've forgotten all about us and moved the war some place else?

They're not very far.

No, I guess not.

Look, even they're getting sick of it.

How long have we been here anyway?

What time is it?

What...

Chico...

Diane...

Chico...

Diane...

Chico!

Gas! Gas, Chico!

Gas!

Heaven.

Chico, gas!

Diane, what's the matter?

Oh, I don't know.

Chico was with me...

just as always...

And then...

Diane.

Don't, don't, don't.

You're tired. Come.

Nothing like that ever happened before.

Go and get some air. I'll finish your work.

No, I'm all right.

- Courage, my son. - Save your breath, Father.

A bit of shrapnel in my ankle.

It's luck, eh? How much leave will they give me for that?

Oh, a week.

- What? You are not serious. - No, it will be four months at least.

Splendid, magnificent. I would give my whole leg for four months in Paris.

Congratulations and good luck. You deserve a rest.

Well, if it isn't my atheist!

- Who is it? - Father Chevillon.

Oh, I'm glad you're here.

Citizen priest...

will you take this and give it to Diane?

- Will you, will you promise? - Yes, Chico, yes.

Tell her...

Tell her I died looking up.

Attention! An offensive has begun!

This station will be in the line of fire.

Orders: we evacuate at once!

Poor child.

It seems so cruel to let her go on hoping...

Believing he's still alive.

Well, what can I do?

Shouldn't you give her some hint?

Try and prepare her for the news when it comes?

After all, I didn't actually see him killed.

What did they tell you at the hospital?

They had no record of him.

- Oh, come in, Boul. - Madame, Gobin, we have arrived!

- Look! - Hello, comrade.

Well, Comrade Gobin!

What's the matter with you two?

From the look on your faces you'd think the war was just beginning instead of ending.

Well, it's about time we begin to celebrate.

Sure!

What kind of celebration can we have without Chico?

Here are the others.

You should have a bowlful of catnip today...

...so you could be happy with the rest of us.

What are you so happy about? Your eyes shining as if...

Oh, Aristide, are you going to tell me I look beautiful?

Who said anything about that?

I want to look beautiful... for Chico.

- Chico? - But the war is over, isn't it?

And he'll be coming home.

- It's not over yet. - Oh, but it will be soon.

Any hour, any minute.

What are you doing back so early?

Who could I sell my books to?

It's madness they want this morning, not wisdom.

They are crowded the streets already.

All you can do to make your way along.

Then I'd better be on my way to the hospital.

The work there won't stop at 11 o'clock

- Aristide. - Hm?

You haven't stopped watching the stars, have you?

I watch them.

But what they have to say has become a mystery to me.

I could not foresee these years of desolation.

How could I pretend to read the stars?

But you can still see Chico's star.

My eyes are growing weaker.

Last night I could barely distinguish Arcturus...

...and there's no brighter star than that.

And couldn't you see Chico's star at all?

- I told you, my eyes... - Oh, of course.

Or it's just that you can't see it so well because... I hear him...

more clearly than ever... every day.

I know he is safe and his star will be shining brighter than ever.

Of course.

Thank you for feeding the cats.

And thank you for all your kindnesses, Diane.

Oh, please...

Chico knew you so much better than I.

You are a fine, good girl.

And I was an arrogant fool.

Four years it's taken me to say that, but...

- There it is. - Oh, Aristide!

Diane!

Monsieur... Monsieur Brissac.

I was getting ready to celebrate when the Armistice begins.

Why shouldn't you celebrate? I'll be celebrating too.

As soon as Chico gets here.

- Chico? - Look.

I've got some onion soup ready for him.

- Diane. - Doesn't it smell good?

It'll be just strong enough by suppertime.

Could he get here by then?

They don't just walk home the minute it's over.

You mean it might be a few days?

Perhaps even longer than that.

Oh, no, I've waited four years.

Poor Diane.

- It's been a sad four years for you. - Oh, no, it hasn't.

See?

I have all these things ready for him.

I've brushed them, and brushed them...

...until there's hardly anything left of them

No, it hasn't been sad for me because...

I suppose you don't really believe he's come to me every day.

Of course I do.

- Diane, you must listen to me. - I'm listening.

Diane!

What is it?

I didn't want to be the one to tell you, but...

I've just come from the War Office.

They were putting up the casualty lists.

Your husband's name was on the list.

You mean... you mean he's been wounded?

He was on the list of those killed in action.

Killed?

It must have been days, maybe weeks ago. Those lists are always that late.

Oh, no, it couldn't be, yesterday he was alive

He came to me.

No, Diane, there couldn't have been any mistake.

But there must be.

Chico is alive.

Gobin will know.

He was with him.

Diane!

Diane, wait!

You said you were with him just before you were wounded.

Tell me, they've made a mistake.

Haven't they?

Diane, the last thing I remember...

I was running to the dugout where Chico was to warn him.

I never saw him again.

But you didn't see him killed.

Did you?

No.

Diane, Father Chevillon is just back from the front.

Why don't you go to see him? Maybe he has news of Chico.

Diane, please.

I'm going to Father Chevillon.

He will know.

Father!

Did you see Chico?

Yes, Diane, I saw him.

Then he isn't dead.

Then the War Office was wrong, wasn't it?

My child, weeks ago at a dressing station,

Chico gave me this for you.

He told me to tell you that... he died looking up.

He can't be dead.

He's come to me every day.

Just as before.

Remember, my child, what Chico told you. To have courage.

Then he never came at all?

Not yesterday, nor...

... nor all the days before?

I just imagined that he came, didn't I?

He will always be with you, perhaps now nearer than ever before.

Chico, Diane, Heaven.

And I was so sure!

I thought God was helping us.

Four years.

Was it was all just childishness?

Do not think God has forgotten.

Our emissaries are conferring now with the enemy.

At any moment the armistice will be declared.

That means thousands of men will not die today, nor tomorrow.

They will come back to those who love them.

Can't you thank God for that?

Chico is dead.

He gave his life for his country.

Chico is dead.

Come, my child.

Oh my dear most merciful Father...

who knows the weakness of our nature...

Four years I believed I was married and that God was protecting us.

There's nothing, it's all false.

I believed in our own heaven.

But now Chico is dead and I know what he knew.

God doesn't exist! There's nothing, nothing, nothing!

Diane, come with me, please.

- Oh, where is there to go? - I'll take you to my home.

Diane.

What's the matter?

Chico...

Diane...

Heaven.

Come, Diane, please.

He's alive.

- Oh, Diane! - He's alive!

Diane, please, listen!

The war is over!

- Chico! - Diane!

Diane, where are you?

Oh, my Diane!

My eyes are still filled with...

They tried to make me believe you were dead,

but they couldn't, they couldn't.

I've been hit by every shell that's made, but I'll never die.

Because the idea inside me was God.

And I'll see, they can't keep me blind.

- I tell you I'm a very remarkable fellow. - Oh, yes.

Subtitles Luis Filipe Bernardes

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