Original subtitles

(birds chirping)

(car engine humming)

(newspaper rustling)

(car door slams)

- Mercy me. Sammy, Sammy, Sammy.

- (laughs) Well, I still gotta get prepped,

so right now I'm still Dennis, Dennis, Dennis. (laughs)

- I can see him in there.

- Well, you'll see even more once I get prepped.

- Like you got a suit and everything?

- Oh, yes! Right here in the bag.

All need is a bathroom to duck into for fifteen minutes.

- Come on, come on.

(door knob clicks)

(ominous music)

(door slams)

Let's have a drink.

Something to get you loosened up.

Oh! How about some Tootsie Rolls!

- Yeah, a drink would be nice.

(sighs)

(water splashing)

- (mumbles) Tootsie roll, right, there you go, sounds good.

How did I get into this?

- [Brandon] Mama, Ma, more Kool-Aid, please!

- More Kool-aid?

- [Brenda] Brandon, please!

(Brandon whines)

Brandon, behave!

- [Brandon] It's not your birthday,

it's my birthday!

Whoo! Oh yeah! (shoes tapping)

You want a Milky Way?

(rustling)

- You ready?

(camera clicks)

- Wow! (camera thumps) You look terrific!

You look better than your picture on Craigslist.

- Well, thank you.

- Come sit down.

(glasses clink)

I love, love, love, love, love the Rat Pack.

But Brandon loves you even more.

(laughs faintly)

- Um, (clears throat)

I had this handmade.

(Brandon laughing and yelling)

- Are you ready to get started?

- Su- Sure.

(glass thumps) Showtime.

(machines beeping)

(loud footsteps)

- Brandon, honey. Your birthday present's here.

(machines beeping and whirring)

- Hey Brandon, it's your birthday?

- Holy moly!

Oh!

Sammy Davis Jr? Sammy Davis Jr?

It's Sammy Davis.

- [Brenda] Sam, Sammy Davis Jr.

- [Brandon] It's Sammy Davis Jr.

- [Brenda] He's here for your birthday.

- [Brandon] Sammy Davis. - [Brenda] He's here for you!

Is Sammy Davis here for me?

- [Brenda] He's here for you! - Yeah. It's good to see you,

buddy! - Sammy Davis.

I think I got you,

- [Brandon] Sammy Davis Jr.

is here? - let me see.

(squawks)

Happy a birthday, Brandon.

- It smells like summer time. Sammy Davis Jr.

I'm gonna leave, let you enjoy your birthday present.

Holler if you need anything.

Take care, my sad little clown.

Happy birthday, baby boy.

(machines beeping) (Brandon coughs)

- Sammy Davis Jr.

- So, how about (Brandon breathes loudly)

how about I sing Mr. Bojangles?

- Can you come? Can you come?

- [Dennis] What? - Can you come here?

- What? - Come here. Sit.

Sit down.

- All right.

- Are you, are you Sammy Davis Jr?

- Yeah, I'm Sammy Davis Jr.

And I'm- I want to sing you what, what, what

Whatever you want, man. I mean, yeah.

(gasps)

No, no.

- Are you the real Sammy Davis Jr?

- Yeah! As close you ever going to get.

So what is, what, what's wrong with you?

I mean, what is all this?

- I got rhumanoid thoracic influenza in my lungs.

I've had it since I was a kid.

I've got it bad.

- I'm sorry, man.

- [Brandon] And I got worms in my heart.

- You got what? (Brandon coughs)

(flatulence) (water sloshing)

(water splashing)

- Is that gross to you?

- What's gross?

The- the tubes? No, no.

I mean, it's what keeps you going, right?

So it's, nah, nah, it's fine.

- I got worms. Right here.

I got worms in my heart.

Only one in 200,000 people have them and I have them.

- [Dennis] You can't kill 'em? - No!

If they die, I die.

- Well, you're strong. Just keep, keep strong.

- I'm gonna die.

- No, you're not going to die.

- I'm gonna die!

- No. Come on, you're not going to die.

- I'm gonna die!

- You're not going to die.

- I'm gonna die!

- You're not gonna die.

- I'm gonna die!

You want the Milky Way?

- No.

- You don't want a Milky Way?

- I'm, I'm good.

(wrapper rustling)

- I'm gonna have one.

(slimy rustling)

(buttons click)

(machine whirring)

Here it comes.

(machine whirring continues) Here it comes.

Here it comes.

Here it comes!

Here it comes!

(machine wheezing)

(chewing)

- [Dennis] So what do you want me to sing?

- When you sing it makes me so happy.

- See, there you go.

Yeah. You gotta be thankful for the happy things, right?

You can't let yourself get down.

You gotta you gotta be positive, man.

- [Brandon] I'm lucky!

- Yes, you are. You are very lucky.

I mean, you've got a mom and she loves you.

I mean, come on. You got so much.

You've got life.

- Are you lucky Sammy Davis, Jr?

- Yeah, yeah. (scoffs)

- [Brandon] I bet you got problems.

- Oh, man, everybody's got problems.

I mean, maybe not so much out in-your-face as you,

but we all got problems.

(machine splurts and gurgles)

- I got problems.

- Hey, I know. That's okay.

- You know?

I'm glad.

I'm glad that you can see

that I got problems.

- Let me do something here, all right?

Come on. Let me make you happy.

Let me cheer you up.

What song do you want to hear, man?

- I wanna hear Candy Man!

- All right! You got it buddy.

It's your birthday!

(shoes tapping)

- Hey, show me something worth some money!

With some energy! And a dance!

- Okay, so we're going do this

for a good friend of mine.

It's his birthday.

(jazz music starts)

And we're going to do Candy Man.

(audience applauds)

♪ Who can take a sunrise ♪

♪ Sprinkle it with dew ♪

♪ Cover it in chocolate with a miracle or two ♪

♪ The Candy Man can ♪

♪ Yes the Candy Man can ♪

♪ The Candy Man can 'cause he sprinkles it with love ♪

♪ And makes the world taste good ♪

♪ Who can take tomorrow ♪

(shoes tapping)

♪ Sprinkle in a dream ♪

♪ Separate the sorry and gather up all the cream ♪

♪ The Candy Man can ♪ (clapping rhythmically)

♪ Yeah the Candy Man can ♪ - The Candy Man can.

(rhythmic splurts)

♪ The Candy Man can 'cause he mixes it with love ♪

♪ And makes the world taste good ♪

♪ The Candy Man can because he sprinkles it with love ♪

♪ And makes the world taste good ♪

(audience applauds)

Happy birthday, Brandon. From the Candy Man.

- Oh yeah! Bravo! (clapping)

Oh!

Bra-vo! (claps)

- Did you liked that?

- [Brandon] I loved that!

- [Dennis] Oh, you loved that?

- The king is pleased!

- Well, I love that.

- You want a Milky way?

The Candy Man has got to have a Milky Way.

- Yeah. All right.

(candy wrap rustling)

(machine beeping faster)

Hey man! What are you doing?

What are you doing?

You can't do that! - Can I have

a kiss on the lips?

- What, no! Come on man,

you gotta stop doing that.

Come on, put that- - You gotta kiss me.

- Put that back on!

(machine beeping faster) - You gotta kiss me.

You gotta kiss me.

- Put that back. You know what?

(kisses)

Put that shit back on your face, man.

(machine beeping slows)

(Brandon chuckling)

What are you laughing about? What's so funny?

- Nothing. (laughs)

When you sing that song, I got a boner.

(laughing)

- Yeah, okay. You know what?

You don't have no problems.

You're gonna be just fine.

You have nothing, nothing at all to be sad about.

- Yeah, you're right.

There's no reason for me to be sad.

- "If you can't change your situation,

you change your perspective."

- [Brandon] What if you can't change your perspective?

- What do you mean?

- Here's my perspective, these tubes.

- I, I'm, I'm saying you, you

you gotta look on the bright side of things. Okay?

- [Brandon] What's something bright in this room

that I should look at?

- Me! Sammy!

How about that?

- Sammy?

- Yeah?

- Did my mother pay you enough for a private touching?

- That's not what I do, man.

- Sammy,

will you sing Candy Man

and get me whacked-off?

- Whacked-off?

I don't do that.

- Sing me the song.

- I don't do that.

You gotta stop this, man.

- Sammy.

I'm dying.

(machine beeping)

(machine beeping fades)

(ice clinks)

(Dennis singing) ♪ Who can't take a rainbow ♪

♪ Wrap it in a sigh ♪

♪ Soak it in the sun and make a groovy lemon pie ♪

♪ The Candy Man ♪

♪ The Candy Man can ♪

♪ The Candy Man because he mixes it with love ♪

♪ And makes the world taste good ♪

♪ Who can take tomorrow ♪

♪ Dip it in a dream ♪

(Brandon sobbing quietly)

♪ Separate the sorrow ♪

♪ Collecting all the cream ♪

♪ The Candy Man can ♪

♪ Yes the Candy Man can ♪

♪ The Candy Man can ♪

♪ He mixes it with love ♪

♪ And makes the world taste good. ♪

(Dennis sighs)

Brandon?

Happy birthday, man.

(exhales) Brandon.

(machine beeping faster)

Brandon?

Oh, shit.

(door creaking)

(door slams)

- Everything go okay?

- Oh, yeah. Yeah. Everything is, everything.

- Thank you so much.

This was such a great idea.

Thank you. Thank you.

- Yeah.

- Okay.

- Craigslist said a hundred dollars.

Is that enough?

You were so perfect.

- Ye- uh, yeah. Um.

Yeah. A hu- a hundred. Fine.

- Is he,

is he?

- Yeah, he's,

he's sleeping.

- Okay great. Thanks.

- You're welcome.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm, I'm ahead of myself.

I'm thinking about my next job.

- Okay. - And I gotta go.

(plastic rustling)

Thank you.

Hey, you know what, Brenda.

How about a little Sammy for you?

Watch this.

(shoes tapping) (soft humming)

Take care.

And, um,

just remember, "The show must go on."

Bye, Brenda.

(footsteps)

- Bye, Sammy.

(door slams)

( Instrumental "Mr. Bojangles" by Sammy Davis Jr)

(humming melody)

(humming melody continues)

- That was wonderful.

So. Wonderful.