Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

SOMEONE VERY FAMOUS PRESENTS...

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

A NIKHIL KAMKOLKAR MOVIE

INDIAN COWBOY: A LOVE-LOVE STORY

Once upon a time in a world far, far away there lived a cowboy.

He was a good cowboy.

Fast on the draw, drank his whisky neat and was scared of no one.

Then one day, he fell in love

Not just plain old love, but beyond love ! The kind that lasts forever.

Love-Love !

And that is how...

Guru meets Amano

Boy meets Girl

In a bar? How original, Nick !

Make it a singles bar, why don't you?

It’s Pizza time !

Where would Guru be?

A bar !

Ha ! Absolutely !

But what kind of bar?

Chinese food?

A Chinese Bar !

A Chinese... Lounge !

A Chinese Cowboy Lounge ! Yes !

Guru and Amano

A love story of galactic proportions !

(Skip) Dude ! Let's hit the clubs tonight. With Diva ! She's hot !

(Female Voice) Skip ! Let's shack out, mate. - Yeah !

(Voicemail) Nick? It’s Diva. You haven't called. Call me, 0k?

(Skip) Hello lovelies!

I love that sound. Here you go, dog.

Dude ! isn't your mom flying in from India today?

Skip, I don't LOVE-LOVE her!

Well, dude, she's your mom, man. That... that's nasty. And you know what else? I think it’s illegal.

Not Ma! Diva!

I don't love-love her!

You love-loved her yesterday !

God ! I was on the rebound I can see it so clearly now

Dude ! You are totally bogus

How do you do this thing where you tell if you are in love-love or you are not...? Because you know what? It's not-not working

I seem to know it’s for real, you know, and I'm so goddamn sure

and then, I'm so damn sure its not!

Nick, you heartbreaker!

You are just gonna break her little eensy-weensy little, fragile little heart. You are a big bad man !

Thanks, Skip

(Diva) You forgot, didn't you?

Its our one week anniversary!

And I got something for your mom too.

Diva, I can't accept this

(Diva) Are you dumping me? (Nick) I’m not dumping you

You are dumping me!

Diva, I don't love-love you

I love-love steak, Nick. Whatever!

Diva, you deserve to be with Mr. Absolutely- Completely-Totally-Right-Guy-For-You !

There you are ! Mr. Absolutely- Completely-Totally-Right-Guy-For-Me !

Diva, I'm not your Mr. Right

(Nick) Ma is back

Way to go, Ma !

You know, when there's smoke in the house you sound an alarm. Got it?

(Woman) Oh, she's falling for it!

(READING FROM NOVEL) He put his arms around her waist and pulled her close to him.

She could feel his hard chest press against her softness.

(Italian Accent) “I love you”, he said. “I love every fibre of your being.“

“Oh John”, Gina cried, tears running down her cheeks

“I love you too ! Promise me you'll always be with me.”

“I promise” he whispered gently in her ear “You are the only woman for me, Gina.”

“The one and only!”

(Speaks to Characters) Very sweet, John.

Bullshit, but very sweet. Gina, he'll be sleeping around in less than a month.

Get real ! There's no such thing as love, you fool!

It’s OK !

Nick ! You scared me !

Sorry.

Hi.

Hi.

Huh ! You look better in photographs.

Well, thanks. I guess. And you are?

I'm Sapna.

Oh ! Hi Sapna

My heart's still pounding

Well. I am sorry.

How long were you standing here?

Well... John was demonstrating his love for Gina!

But, who are you? What are you doing in my bedroom?

Your mom told me I could sleep here.

(Nick) You came from India with Ma? (Sapna) Yes

Why?

Your mom told my mom... they work together in Delhi.

And your mom said that she was visiting you for a couple of weeks and she

insisted that I stay with her. Didn't she tell you about me?

No

Look, I'm very sorry.

I’ll take my things out of your room

Do you know where she is?

(Nick) Who's the guest? (Ma) Sapna?

Isn't she cute?

Ha ! And who is Sapna?

My best friend's daughter

Best friend?

Yes. Sunila. My best friend. From a long, long, time ago.

(Nick) You don't have any friend called Sunila, Ma. (Ma) I do — I never heard of her

That's because you never listen to me. - Ma ! Why is Sapna here?

She’s here because I asked her to be here.

What? You think I brought her here just to meet you?

Oh. You have such an ego. She’s on her way to Seattle to study architecture.

I don't think she'll have anything to do with you.

I mean, what is it that you wanna do again? Make movies? Ha!

Ok. How long is she staying here?

Three weeks. I promised Sunila that I'd make sure that she adjusted well to living here.

Stop it, Ma. Stop it. I'm not a kid anymore

Sapna, would you please tell this kid...

Sapna, I make all that food, and he eats Pizza

You should introduce Sapna to your girlfriend

I don't have a girlfriend, Ma. We broke up

Oh ! How sad. How terribly sad.

What do you do, Nick?

Software (Sauna) Your mom said that you wanted to make films.

(Nick) Movies, not Films. (Ma) He's a dreamer. Just like his father.

I'm gonna do it, Ma

What do you do? Design really tall buildings?

Actually, I design inexpensive housing for rural populations.

Really? - Really

Sunila ! They like each other. Yes !

Oh, our plan is working. Well, soon they will fall in love and... I cannot wait to be a grandmother!

From our up-to-the-minute market research with regard to the need for... computer isolation and computer security

As the internet enters every aspect of our lives, we need security. Sure, sure. Security is what we need.

Email me sometime. My inbox awaits you.

And we have a software product in mind that will revolutionize the idea of security.

Bringing it to every PC. Every home. And for a fraction of the current cost. Our research has put us on the cutting edge of technology

Skip ! Short name. I love short names.

Dude ! Veronica is so hot!

Dude ! She's got this move... She... sits dowm on you...

And then she leans back...

I know that your Kamasutra does not have a move like that, man. Blew my mind.

Skip ! She must be like twice your age

For twice the fun

I mean if Sapna ever finds out I hang out with someone like you...

Sapna who?

Nobody

Nobody ! I think she's your new girlfriend! Is she your new girlfriend?

Stop it ! - She's your giflfriend ! She's not my girlfriend

Alright, alright, alright, if you wanna know! - I wanna know!

Ma brought this woman with her from India. Sapna.

Dude ! I like your mom.

Dude, your mom is totally trying to set you up with her.

She wants to design... alright, get this ! “Indian Rural Housing!”

Not my type. No way.

Hi, Sapna!

Just a casual hi, that's all. “Hi Sapna, how are you?”

Lighten up, not so serious. Just ask her, Nick.

Just ask her if she wants to go out dancing with you. “Sapna, do you wanna go out dancing with me tonight?”

Sure - See? It works.

(Sapna) You wanna leave around ten or so? (Nick) OK

Thanks. Put them on his tab, alright?

Hey, to Sapna, man. I like her, she's cool. -Yeah, she is!

Hey, don't do it. - Do what?

Don't say she's the one, please. - Ok

Even if she is? - Oh God !

Come on, man. Cause I feel a connection with her you know?

A connection man? She... she's thousands of miles away from home, she's vulnerable, she's homesick ! That...

she's fine, but that's not a connection, man.

Besides you just met her yesterday. How could she possibly be the one? Alright.

Well, yeah, true love is instantaneous. A bullet to the brain.

You know what? There's been a few too many bullets to that brain already, man. Besides...

she's too cool for you, man. I'm surprised she doesn't have a boyfriend already.

Don't.

(to Nick) Don't what? (to Sapna) Nick's afraid to ask you if you've got a boyfriend.

Oh, don't be shy. Ask me if I have a boyfriend.

Skip is nuts. Ok? And I'm not shy.

Do you have a boyfriend? No, I do not have a boyfriend.

Raghu?

This is so beautiful!

What? - Nothing

Beauty always makes me feel sad.

Ok, I'm gonna tell you a joke.

Why do cricket players keep rubbing the ball on their pants?

Because they always want their batsmen to be clean-bowed!

You don't play cricket, do you? - I play baseball.

Look I'm not exactly crazy about India.

I love India. Its festivals, music, culture... - Pollution, poverty...

I was only joking. It was a joke

OK ! I'm sorry, you love India. Fair enough

It’s OK. I miss cricket. That's all

Sapna, it was just a joke It was just a joke !

What? Nicky wants to know about cricket cause Nicky's in love !

Nicky's gonna play cricket cause Nicky's in love !

Nick ! Wake up!

Shit.

If you are this lazy, you'll never make your film.

HAI !

Hi !

I taught you how to do the funky Indian dance, remember? What! What!

No. No, I don't - Dude, you do no good to my ego!

I'm sorry, but I'm in the middle of an interview

Oh ! Hey, what’s up dude?

Its OK. I have to use the bathroom

He's gotta pee !

How could you do that? - How could you not remember me?

I remember you.

Alright, now will you please leave?

Skip ! - OK, Mister Skip...

Hey, you don't have to be formal Just call me Skip !

Mister Skip.

So is that your nickname? - Yes, that is my nickname. And don't ask me what my real name is

And your real name is? - I'm not gonna tell you !

Alright then ! I guess I'll just have to keep calling you Mister Skip. Mister Skip !

Ok, you really wanna know what my real name is?

I really wanna know what your real name is

Then come dancing with me tonight

Dancing, mister Skip?

Yeah !

I'll get back to you on that one. How about that?

I'm a busy woman I don't have time ! Of course.

Nick!

Do you wanna go with me to the Indian store?

I was working on my script.

What kind of film are you writing? - Movie, not a film

What's the difference, Nick?

Well, a film is Art meets Life. A movie is Art meets Fantasy

What's your fantasy about?

It's a love story… of galactic proportions

So does your love story of galactic proportions have a sad ending of similar proportions?

No.

So it is a fantasy.

I love happy endings

All good love stories have sad endings. True love is always tragic.

Learn from the classics, you fool ! Romeo and Juliet, Laila and Majnu

Its only a movie - Huh?

You fool !

Hey !

You are the one who reads all those romantic novels - For a good laugh !

The Italian stud, new in town, meets the local, repressed virgin

and touches her giving her multiple orgasms right where she stands.

Her entire body is one big, huge, G-spot

You know, someone should write a novel about you !

Sure. The Indian mini stud!

Walks into town and asks the local virgin's mother if he could please take her daughter out for a cup of garam, garam chai

Speaking of which, I'm going to go get myself some chai.

Hi Nick! - Hi Diva

How are you? - Good. And you?

Hah. Lousy. I miss you.

I want us to be together - You know it’s not possible

Why not? Do you have a brand new girlfriend?

No. It’s not that.

Nick? I love-love you. I do.

Hi. I'm Sapna.

I knew it ! Don't kid yourself

He won't be around forever.

Tch, tch, tch, tch. Ex-lover?

You think I'm a jerk, don't you?

Well, there is something called commitment

But... at least you told her you were leaving

I left the relationship ! Because I don't love-love her

And if someone you love-loved just left you what would you do then?

I would never let them go. Never!

Hi Maya.

I knew you'd come. Sooner or later.

I suppose you wanna kill me?

No. Is Raghu at home?

No.

Will he be back soon?

Hmm, No.

He left me darling. The same way he left you

In the middle of the night. Two months after we came here.

I haven't seen him since.

I was only his best friend. How sweet.

Maya !

Rats ! Rats ! I can't marry her I can't just leave. Can I?

All the time we spent fighting... We spent fighting over you

He loved you, darling You were the only woman he ever loved

Nick? I wanna get drunk! - What? I said, I wanna get drunk!

(SONG) If you come a little closer… You could kiss me… (SONG CONTINUES)

Was that good? - Oh, we should have gone dancing, Mister Skip

Oh, will you stop calling me Mister Skip?

Ok, shirt's off. Should take off your bra too... Sapna?

Told you not to eat that pizza.

Ah, Strap ! Ok, where's the hook, front or back?

I'll try the back first.

(Sapna) Give me a kiss Just one kiss. Come on.

I love you. I love you so much.

Tell me when you are sober. OK? Goodnight, Sapna

Goodnight, Ma

Goodnight, Raghu

Amano sees Guru sitting alone at his favorite table

She takes his drink from the bartender and walks over to him.

Guru doesn't even look up when she places a glass of Whisky in front of him

Just casually throws a few coins on the table

And then, he sees her offering of "Love-Love"

Nick?

Did you sleep well last night?

Yes. Like a baby.

What time did you get back?

Around midnight

Sapna ! You got back at three A.M.

Well, I must have lost track of time.

It’s not a good idea for a woman to lose track of anything.

(Shopkeeper) Twenty dollars, please - Ofcourse

Hey, hey, hey, we didn't do anything last night!

I didn't even... all I did was take your clothes off

Because you threw up on them!

So you don't remember the connection between us last night?

What connection? - You told me you loved me ! - I don't think so

Ha ! You wanted to kiss me.

Did you kiss me? - No

Did you look at me after you took off my clothes? - No, I didn't.

Swear

Why did I do that? - Are you asking me?

I don't know why I did that. I'm sorry.

Ok, you guys ready for the story?

Yep.

(Nick) Come on ! Let's hear it ! Yes? (Kids) Yeah !

Once upon a time, in India, there lived a king.

He was a good king. Kind, generous, took care of his people...

in a beautiful city in India called Nainital

One day, he heard there was a monster in his lake

He didn't like monsters, man. He was like... I gotta take care of this monster

So he dives right into this dark lake...

and grapples with the monster and fights with him and all of that, and then BOOM!

He pulls it out of the lake

But it’s not a monster! It’s this beautiful fishwoman !

She pleads with him and she says...

"You have to put me back in the water, otherwise I'm gonna die. "

So... he puts her back in the water And he goes back to his palace, and...

he tries to get back to his work, but he can't work anymore. He can't eat, he can't sleep

So, he goes back to the lake and he says “Alright, gotta find my beautiful fishwoman.”

He dives into the lake, and he searches and searches.

No luck

Then he starts praying to his favorite God.

Lord Rama. And Lord Rama comes before him and says...

If you wanna be reunited with the fishwoman, you have to become…

Half-fish, half-man yourself. You have to give up your kingdom, you have to give up...

everything, and you have to go live with her in the lake”

The king says, “I accept”

And he gets reunited with the beautiful fishwoman !

It’s boring.

I hate romantic stories

Why couldn't the king just pull out a gun and... BANG! BANG! BANG!

Man, you guys are tough.

Yeah !

Hey, I'm sorry about last night

Its my fault. I shouldn't have gotten so drunk.

No, no, no ! Its my fault. I mean, I shouldn't have let you drink that much.

Ok. Fair is fair. It’s our fault. Fifty-Fifty.

Fifty-Fifty !

Sapna. I have such a connection with you. You know. I think I...

It’s not love, you fool.

So you really love this Raa-ghu dude, huh?

What about Nick? - What about Nick? - Gotcha.

Well, then, you should find this Raghu dude, then - I don't have his address.

Hey, you are talking to the Master here ! I'll find it for you. Have it for you by this weekend

Hey. Thought I heard you, man What are you guys talking about?

Nick, I'm sorry - Ex-lover, huh?

Chasing a guy who dumped you That's so pathetic.

But I still love him.

I thought you didn't believe in love Ms. “There's-No-Such-Thing-As-Love-You-Fool.”

You don't know what love is Mr. “Oh-I-Feel-Such-A-Connection-With-You”

Weren't you supposed to go to Seattle or something? So go to Seattle !

(Nick rehearsing) So, you wanna go?

Go. Its your life, Sapna

(Nick) So, you are leaving?

Yes. Thanks for everything, Nick - You are welcome.

Come on, I'll drop you off - No. Thanks, but I called a cab

You wanna go? Go. Its your life, Sapna.

I really want you to stay - You told me to leave

I was mad. I lost it, I'm sorry I want you to stay

Even if I love Raghu?

I shouldn't stay

No. I want you to stay Its 0k if you love... Raghu

Hey, I'll help you find Raghu, but stay

That at night when you took off my clothes... did you look?

Are you that modest?

No, we are all made of skin and bones and flesh

Its not whether you saw me naked, its whether or not you looked.

Yeah, I looked…

…at your face

You look really cute when you snore

I don't snore - Yeah, you do. You snore

I'm taking you home.

Let me dowm ! Nick, please. I'm scared of heights. Please Nick...

(Nick writes) Amano had always believed she knew what love was

But now she wasn't sure anymore

Soon she'd have to make a choice

Between the man she knew she...

love-loved, and the man she had always thought she was in love with

(Boss) Part four of our mission statement involves what we've learnt from our up-to-the-minute market research

which indicates a desperate need on the part of new internet users for computer isolation and computer...

Baloney, Blade !

Sure, sure, perhaps we need more... detail !

No ! Give me a paraDINE

ParaDIN.

ParaDIGM?

Uh… paraDIM ! A good paradim !

Or I'm gonna fire your sorry ass Right here, right now!

Sure, sure, Skip knows the paradigm… DIM Skip? - Oh !

Ah… The para... di... is...

Sex ! Yeah... yeah… SEX !

We're designing computer software to ensure

the security of the computer networks through the new millennium

How does sex fit into that?

Very snugly as a matter of fact

We design the computer networks to behave as...

a human sexually active community that is very promiscuous

But they're exchanging electronic data packets

instead of biological, data-bearing fluids

This is nonsense!

Moochie ! I like his paraDICK. Dime.

Yeah... I like it too.

Email me the specification, wilya?

You got it, Moochie !

Mister Mundy.

Mister Skip !

Mister Skip !

Ok, here we go. Sikandar-Khorana-Imanuel-Panth

What?

Sikandar Khorana Imanuel Panth

I like your name.

Well, that makes one of you - No, I like it

It sounds like a name from different cultures

It was my mom's idea. She's the only one who can even remember the whole thing

Yeah? So what's her name?

Eileen

Your father? - Chuck Junior

Hmm... let's see. And you are...

Sikandar - Khorana - Imanuel - Panth

But Mister Skip to you.

You really like my name?

I really, really like your name.

Vij, I've never shared... I've never had this conversation with any woman that I've ever been out with

and I've been out with a lot of women What am I saying?

Yeah, what are you saying, Skip?

I'm saying... it’s really cool to have met you. Very cool

Yeah. Likewise, Sikandar Khorana Imanuel Panth

I love her ! And she loves me too, dude!

Skip, you met her just a few days ago

It doesn't matter man, this love thing is instantaneous

It breaks the whole time-space continuum man !

Like you said, it’s a bullet to the brain ! So glad that for once you were right

Veronica? Veronica, I can't do this.

Sure you can, pretty boy.

Veronica, I can't.

I'm in love. Oh, for the first time in my life I'm in love

And I can't do this

Love? It's a rip-off

You... You don't wanna move in with me because of my bedsheets?

It’s not just the bedsheets It’s your horrible taste in furniture too!

Whoa ! I love my furniture! Do not say anything about my furniture, alright?

Alright then, I wont say anything about anything !

Change the bedsheets. Change the furniture, the blue chair. Change it all

Dude, do what it takes. That's what love is all about.

That's what love is all about. You should write a book

Sapna, what happened between you and Raghu?

I was all dressed up on my wedding day

My friends were with me. I was so happy.

A big huge smile on my face and I was chattering away and then, I saw Mummy come in

But she wasn't smiling. My heart sank I thought someone had died.

Mummy asked my friends to leave us alone

and she told me. Raghu had left for the US with Maya, his best friend

They didn't last

I went to go see Maya, and I thought I'd see Raghu there

you know, get my ring back And, he had left her too

She told me that he still loves me.

And you still love him? (SONG PLAYS) I’ve got a heart filled with you…

I'm sorry - Don't be

No, I should be. Why did I do that?

Sapna, I'm here with you

And I'll never leave you.

A year ago, Raghu said the same thing.

Well, maybe he didn't love-love you. Sapna, I do.

I... I love-love you.

(Sapna) Then come with me to India

To meet your parents? - No. To live there. Close to me.

What is this? Some kind of test? - No

Just throw everything I have here out the window and follow you to live somewhere in India?

Yes.

Got my life here. My job, I don't care about. That's not it.

But I wanna make big, action-adventure, special-effects filled Hollywood movies, you know.

You are writing a love story.

An action-adventure love story.

Maybe I can tempt you to stay

My Indian mini stud

Sapna, stay with me

We'll have so much fun together, I can make my movies and

you can do whatever it is you architects do

I can't.

Nuts. This is nuts

Maybe it’s not really love then, you know

Maybe not

Nick!

Nothing

Dude ! So go to India, dude. Head out east, you Indian Cowboy, you !

That’s what love-love is all about

(Boss) Women problems? Sure, sure, I know I got a wife !

Women ! They come and go in a man's life

You know the one thing that is constant?

Work ! Work is what we are married to. And don't ever forget it

(Ma) Do you want to marry Sapna, yes or no?

Ma, she doesn't love me And I don't know if I love her

(Ma) Do you know when I first realized that I truly loved your father?

You were three years old.

You woke up in the middle of the night crying

Guru picked you up, put you on his shoulder

I can still hear him talking to you

And you gurgling happily

We had been married five years

(Nick) I’m different Ma

I'm not you. And I'm not Pops

(Ma) I must be the odd one...

Ma? Do you remember when we had gone to Nainital? And we were standing on that small hill looking down at the lake?

Pops came up to me and he said "See Beta, the beauty that is India"

And then he walked away. Just walked away And that was like the only thing he said to me during that whole entire trip

He was always so distant, Ma He was always so distant with me

Where he came from, fathers didn't say "I love you" to their sons

I will !

And I won't leave them to go live in another country

Why, Ma? Why did he have to go back to India?

Why did you have to go back with him?

(Ma) He followed his heart I followed my heart

(Bell Rings) (Ma) I’ll get it.

Ma? - Yeah?

I love you - I love you too, Beta

(On the Phone - Sapna) I don't wanna leave you Actually, I'm already missing you

Do you think that's true love?

(Nick) This is nuts. I want us to be together Its gotta be true love...right?

(Sapna) I don't know

(Nick) But its possible, right?

(Sapna) Yeah.

What do you think?

About what? -About this!

Dude, I feel so bad for you I found him.

Who?

(Molly) Raghu ! Come on, open the door baby! Please! Raghu ! Raghu!

Rats. This had to happen.

Molly ! What are you doing here? - Cool place!

How did you find my place? - I followed you

You can't come in here. My fiancé is coming back today

Oh Raghu ! Make me your fiancé!

I'm not leaving my fiancé Now, please, I want you to leave

Raghu ! I'm in love with you I really am

Molly ! You are crazy Now get out

Come on baby !

Rats ! - Rats?

What do you mean “rats”? I hate rats

Well, these “rats” are very aggressive And very hungry

Oh, oh no ! What are you doing?

Letting them out So they can scrounge for food I'm gonna open it ! I'm gonna open it!

It was funny!

(Skip) I’m real sorry (Nick) No, that's great

She'll be happy-

You know, he actually doesn't live far from here

You have the wrong apartment

Wait, dude, dude... We're Sapna’s friends !

Sapna? Don't know her.

Ok, Don Juan. We’ll bring her here and you can tell her that yourself.

Yeah, Don Juan. We'll bring her and then you can tell her.

Never applied for credit. I rent a hole because they don't even ask my name

Don't have a bank account. No phone number, no email address

How did you guys find me?

Library card. You did apply for a library card.

I hate the information age

So, what’s your connection with Sapna? - Oh, he's in love with her

So what's the problem? - She's in love with you !

But I don't love her anymore Tell her I'm engaged

Hey, I want her to love me for me not because you aren't available.

I'm gonna go tell her we found Raghu, this is where he lives and that's the end of this story

No, no, no, don't ! Don't tell her where I live !

Look, I know how you can make her fall in love with you

Love is a reaction to an action.

Newton’s unwritten law of human emotion

She fell in love with me because I acted a certain way. Did certain things

Compliments, cards, love letters and flowers. Lots of flowers!

That is so corny - It’s her birthday tomorrow

OK, surprise her...

with a chocolate cake and a romantic candlelit dinner at home. She hates going out

She loves going out!

I was her boyfriend, OK? I know these things. Trust me

And order Chinese food. She loves Chinese food Do we have a plan?

Marvelous ! We have a plan !

Happy Birthday, Sapna!

How did you know it was my birthday? - I know a lot more about you than you think.

You know the drill. I'd like you to blow out the candle and then I'd like you to have dinner with me. Just the two of us.

(Nick) Got your favorite, Chinese food.

(Sapna) Chinese food... I hate Chinese food.

(Sapna) Raghu used to always take me out for Chinese food and I always pretended that I loved it

(Nick) Do you like chocolate cake? - Ugh

Ok ! Change of plans. We are going dancing.

Look, Nick. I was looking through this directory and I found this company that looks for lost relatives

Maybe they can help us find Raghu

Raghu, Raghu ! Forget about him, OK? Damn it ! Just forget about Raghu.

I'll find him myself.

What if he has a fiancé? What if, he doesn't love you anymore?

It’s that trick candle I knew it'd make you laugh

(Nick Writes) Amano believed that true love was always tragic

Perhaps she was right after all

Perhaps she was right after all

Rats. It had to happen.

Happy Birthday, Sapna

(Raghu) Hi Sapna, how you doing?

(Sapna) Kiss me - What?

Kiss me - No!

I can't. - Kiss me !

Let go of the past, Sapna - I said, kiss me !

(Hank) And he said no Goddamn it! When a man says no, he means no!

Not yes, not maybe, but no !

My... my... my roommate ! Hank. Hank, meet Sapna

(Hank) Hello, Sapna.

You love her, you don't love her. You love her. You don't love her.

Yes. I am gay.

Happy?

Please, please don't tell my parents.

You do you don't. You do, you don't. You love her. You don't. You do. You don't love her

You could have said goodbye

I'm sorry, Sapna. I should have told you

But I couldn't even tell myself

When did you?

After coming here

I met Hank and fell in love

Never looked back

You should tell your parents Tell everybody

(Raghu) I’m not a hero, Sapna I can’t fight all that prejudice

I just wanna live my life like a human being.

(Sapna) Every human being has to fight, Raghu

(Hank) She's right

Hi - Hi

Hi!

(Sapna) So, what do we do now?

(Nick) There is no “we”

(Sapna Jokes) I think I love you, Nick.

(Nick Jokes Back) It’s not love, you fool. You are on the rebound

(Sapna Jokes) Yes. I don't feel a connection.

(Sapna) I’m leaving tomorrow, Nick I'm going back to India

Shit.

I'll see your movie when it gets to India...

Can't write a love story when you don't know what love is. Right?

(Skip) Whoa, ladies, ladies ! ...but I'm in love So long ladies!

(Sapna Guesses) Embrace ! Hug? Embrace ! Affection !

Touch, stroke

(Skip Guesses) Retard !

(Sapna Guesses) Mad, crazy !

(Vij) Time is up !

(Nick) Love ! The word was love How could you not guess love?

(Sapna) It's more fun watching you suffer (Vij) You go, girl!

(Nick) Very funny. Ok, I got a tough one for Skip.

(Skip) I got what I need.

(Nick) Hey, we give you the phrase. - I got what I need

(Vij Guesses) Alright ! Ok. Four words. Second word.

(Vij) Me? Me, me... No... You!

(Vij) Ok. Fourth word.You... you... Me ! Ok.

(Vij) First word... Dead ! Writing... Money... Last Will ! Will...

(Vij) Third word.

(Vij) Marriage, marriage, will you...

(Vij) engage me? Will you... marriage me?

(Vij) Will you... will you... will you marry me?

(Nick) He's nuts ! (Sapna) Shut up.

(Skip) Vij, I never thought I'd be doing this...

I was scared, and nervous, intimidated and

but you just make it so easy

You came into my life and you touched my heart and my soul And now, they want you

And I want you

Vij, will you marry me?

(Vij) Yes.

(Skip) Vij, I love-love you !

(Nick Writes) It was time for a showdown.

Guru had to choose. Between his love and his life

(Skip) Where's Nick?

Hi - Hi

Make your movie, Nick I even wrote a sad ending for you

(Sapna Writes) It was a duel to the death. And the winner would belong to Amano

Amano wanted Guru to leave and save his life But Guru would never leave her

The heavens turn their back on her and move away further and further

Until they disappear. And only blackness remains

Fade out. The End.

Does she kill herself?

What do you think?

(Nick) I can't live in India.

(Sapna) I can't live here. GUNSHOT!

(Ma) Tell me, quickly. What are they doing? (Skip) Yeah ! OW !

(Nick) Fifty-Fifty ! Fifty-Fifty, here and there !

Come on, with all this air-travel and technology, we can do it

(Sapna) Fifty-Fifty (Nick) Deal !

(Skip) Ma, Nicky's in love !

(Sapna) What about Hollywood? (Nick) Well, I kinda like these Bollywood films. - Movies, not films.

(Sapna) Relax, will you? I'm taking you home!

AND SO AMANO LIVED ALL ALONE IN THAT LAND FAR, FAR AWAY...

SKIP AND VIJ ENJOYED THEIR HOLLYWOOD STYLE HAPPY ENDING... WITH IT’S MANY UPS AND DOWNS...

(Skip) Vij doesn't wanna marry me. She doesn't wanna see me

(Skip) She wants to move to Australia to get away from me. I mean, I changed the furniture and everything

(Skip) OK, I didn't change the furniture, but I did change the sheets

(Skip) And I kept the blue chair, but that's compromise, you know... that's what relationships are about dude !

NICK AND SAPNA ARGUED, LOVED, WORKED, LIVED, LAUGHED, CRIED TOGETHER EVERAFTER.

(Nick) No, no, no, no, its your turn to do the dishes (Sapna) Ok, then you change the diapers !

(Nick) I'll do the dishes! I love you, sweets (Sapna) I love you too (TITLE SONG PLAYS)