Original subtitles

I grew up believing that if you were a good girl, obeyed all the commandments, and were

kind to animals and old people, that the really terrible things in life couldn't happen to

you.

Listen, now you're crazy.

Just a bit.

No.

Just...

Just a bit.

I bet she's late.

She is not going to be late.

She's always late.

She used to make guys sit on the sofa for hours while she tried on different pairs of

shoes.

Dad would grill them and mom would force them to eat.

Yeah.

You know, I can't believe if anyone did this.

What?

Proposed.

I mean, they've been best friends for years.

Why ruin a great relationship?

You know, it's great.

I remember thinking, why me?

But bad things happen to good people all the time.

People just like you and me.

Suffering is as much a part of life as happiness.

Soon or later, we all know it.

Stop.

I can't read while you're watching me.

It sucks.

I'm kidding.

I'm kidding.

It's fantastic.

It's poignant.

It's moving.

It's emotional.

It's supposed to be a comedy.

And it's hilarious.

You're sure you're not just being polite?

Oh, right.

Vinnie, when have you ever known me to be polite?

That's a good point.

You guys?

You did it.

No, this is, I'm telling you, this is the best comedy I've read in years.

Face it, Vinnie.

We are good.

We're going to win awards.

We're going to be very famous and filthy rich.

We'll be able to move to the country and have a dozen children.

You're going to be able to afford the best psychiatrists.

We're going to be a very famous team like Ginger Rogers first there.

And Tom and Jerry and the two stooges.

I thought it was three stooges.

Well, I'm working on that.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

We've put, put, put, come on.

Dr. Bennett said half an hour.

My legs are falling asleep.

You've got to give them a chance to swim upstream.

What else there?

This is Chinese herbs for infertility.

It's going to make those eggs stand up and sing.

I don't want singing eggs, Vinnie.

I want a baby.

I want a baby.

I want a baby.

Mm.

That is very delicious.

Come on.

You know, in the past couple years, I've had more tests and hormones than I can name.

Injections and summations.

Mischarities.

So if I have to drink green goo, I quit.

Wait, wait, wait.

Did you hear that?

What?

They're out of the gate.

It's Simon, the semen in the lead.

Wait.

Baby Ruth is pulling ahead on the inside of the cervical wall.

No, it's Simon and the semen and baby Ruth neck and neck.

It's...

What?

They've entered the fallopian tubes.

I've lost transmission.

Have baby Ruth.

Vinnie!

Vinnie!

Let's go.

It's my sperm.

All that time and that's it.

Oh, look.

Very funny.

Very funny.

Oh, my God.

Are you going to drive?

Yes.

Just drive it.

Come on.

It's my pleasure.

It's my pleasure.

It shouldn't hurt.

Just a little pressure now.

Just about three years worth.

Vinnie!

Would you give me a break if I can't do it myself.

I at least want to be here.

I don't know.

I'm not going to do that.

You can give me a break if I can't do it myself.

I at least want to be here.

Mm.

We've only achieved one transfer.

And you've had a whole series of failed implants.

It doesn't look good.

We can always try again.

No, we're tapped out, Doc.

Physically and emotionally and financially.

Maybe it just wasn't meant to be.

Can you say that, Vinnie?

It was meant to be.

Women all over the world get pregnant.

They don't even try.

I'm pregnant this time.

You'll see.

That was David.

You want us to know how the rewrites are coming?

How are the rewrites coming?

Oh, the boss should be writing slashers, not sitcoms.

Okay, how about this?

A murderous pregnant woman goes on the rampage

after being confined to her bed for five months.

Sorry, no drinking, no smoking, no slashing.

Convicted felons do less time than this.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Convicted felons do less time than this.

Being a baby, aren't I?

That's okay.

I like babies.

Good, because I want to have about six.

Ooh.

Come on, that's another few weeks of hormones,

and then you'll be out of the danger zone.

Okay.

Hey, are you crazy?

That's too heavy.

It smells just like mom's.

It is.

I have been asking her for that recipe for years.

Your mother won't give you a recipe?

No.

Yeah, you see, that way when she's dead,

we'll remember her whenever we wanted to meet her.

It's very scary.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Everybody say happy graduation.

Put that thing down.

Oh, come on, I'm making a record for her.

High school graduation.

Does everybody say something meaningful and clever?

This is your Uncle Jack, right here.

There he is.

By the time you see this, he'll probably be bald.

And your parents will both be seen now,

but no one will be able to tell the difference.

Oh, look, here comes Lori.

Lori will probably be on her fifth husband.

Oh, it's cute, Annie.

Honey, if you're even still kidding,

you have failed miserably in your duty as an American teenager.

Oh, and this is your God parents,

and we have to be very nice to them because Marvin is a very rich urologist,

and we expect him to put you right through college.

Look, you can choose your friends, but not your mother and father.

So I want you to know, I don't hold you in any way responsible.

Thank you.

Look, there's Mommy.

Oh, look, there's Mommy.

Oh, look, there's Mommy.

Oh, now see this bulge and farmer will probably be behind her.

Oh.

Listen out, Miranda, for all the hell you've put me through so far,

you better be an angel when you finally come out.

Miranda, what happened to baby Ruth?

Stop it.

I can get him.

All right.

Get him.

Good boy.

Yeah, what a good boy.

All right, you guys, something for posterity here.

Now, Miranda, all right.

Now, I want you to know, I'm going to go to the house.

Now, Miranda, all right.

Now, I want you to know that we didn't just leap into this puppy purchase right here.

No, no, your mother, who I love dearly spent millions and trillions of dollars on books to research the exact breed.

Gentle, yet loyal and persistent.

Well, you're interested.

Isn't that right, Merlin?

Merlin.

Merlin?

No, absolutely not.

Yes.

No dog will be named Merlin.

No, Gordon.

What are you doing?

Come on.

Oh, man.

All right, turn the video off.

Gentle, yet loyal and persistent.

That's what the book said.

Have the emphasis on the persistent.

On your heart.

Thank you.

No, I'm serious, all right?

I'm just nervous as hell.

I don't know what happened to Cessarion.

Everything will be fine.

Look, it's just a brush.

It's just a brush.

I always get sick when I'm stressed.

Vinny, you're never sick and you're never stressed.

Do you have a temperature?

Let's reschedule.

No.

No way.

You cannot go into the delivery room sick.

Yeah.

Look, don't worry about it.

I'll be okay.

And if I'm not okay, we'll reschedule.

What a mule.

Come here, pal.

Don't move.

Do something with that dog, would you?

I don't think she will.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Okay.

Is she all right?

I'm serious.

Vinny, is she all right?

No, she's all right.

Sorry.

I don't know if I can hear you.

I feel a little fearful.

See?

Are you sure she's all right?

Let me see.

Oh.

See, it's beautiful.

Look at her.

Look at her.

Oh.

Oh.

It's viewing time, round one.

Oh.

Send them away.

What are you kidding me?

I'd stampede.

Are you feeling Vin?

I feel barrel and manly.

We did it.

We did.

Hi.

Hey.

Hi.

You're all right.

Oh, you're beautiful.

Oh, she's an angel.

For this, I would travel 3,000 miles all over again.

Even though they lost my luggage,

and we almost crashed.

Little turbulence.

She looks like grandpa.

You mean bald and toothless.

Vinnie, what are you doing on the bed?

I mean, you still got your shoes on.

Jack, Jack, Jack.

Wash your hands.

My relax.

Jackie, come on.

You can say hi.

Thank you.

We give thanks for our wonderful lives,

and our friends,

and our families.

And most of all this year, we give special thanks

for our wonderful Miranda Rose.

Amen?

Amen.

Amen.

Oh, is this instant turkey?

You don't have to eat it.

Janet, this is delicious, what's next?

Oh, don't tell her, Janet.

If you die, she'll remember you every time she eats a cranberry.

Yeah, once a year.

Exactly.

Oh, Vinnie, I really like your new painting.

The one on the porch.

It's for Miranda, you want to?

Oh, it's very spiritual.

Well, what did you expect from a monk?

News on velvet.

It was never going to be a monk, Marvin.

Well, only because you seduced him into a life of evil debauchery.

Did you be a brat, Jack?

Vinnie, beat him up, just end my honor.

Were you really going to be a monk?

Mm-hmm.

Until Roxie seduced me to a life of evil debauchery.

Oh!

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

Roxie!

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

Look at Dan.

Hey.

She feels hot, honey.

I think she's getting a cold.

But maybe she's just gotten a tooth.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

It was STU.

The Canary Lands in STU, not Sup.

Canary Lands in STU.

Good!

That's it?

Yes?

Okay.

We're out of here.

Ah!

Hey, guys.

Hey!

Goodnight, tenants, you darling.

Miranda you darling.

Night Roxy, woman's work is never done, eh?

Bye, night Vinnie.

Ciao, baby.

He got you good on that one today.

Hi, I'm 20.

Ah!

Oh, she feels hot.

Well, sure.

Every baby feels hot when the mother buries

and mother 800 pounds of blankets.

Hello.

Go hide it.

Uh, dinner, dinner, dinner.

Shouldn't know, that'll be great.

Love to, yeah.

Eight o'clock, that'd be great.

Great, see you then.

That was David.

And he invited us to dinner and I said OK.

Uh-huh, well, you're going to have to get us a sitter.

Hey, for temperatures 101, I can't leave her like this.

All right, well, I'll go cancel the sitter.

Bye.

I know, I know.

Well, should I call Dr. Saxe again?

He said it's just a respiratory flu.

All the kids have it.

Hey!

Hey!

OK, I know, I know.

This is Winston, the doctor will see you now.

It's taking so long.

Just try to relax.

Relax.

She screams her head off for 12 hours straight.

Now she's not making a sound.

She's exhausted.

You could her hand.

It's blue.

Got her mouth turning blue.

Do something to the doctor.

Excuse me, please.

Doctor!

Please, hurry!

Where's the?

Hello?

Hello?

Excuse me.

This is my fate right out here in the waiting room.

Sorry.

My mouth is all blue.

Doctor, can you report to the nurse station?

Please, please.

Doctor, can you report to the nurse station?

Please, please.

Somebody tell us what's wrong with her.

I'm just here for her, Vitals.

We've been here eight hours.

We've seen a half dozen doctors.

Now, why won't somebody talk to us?

Doctor, be here, sir.

Well, can you please tell me which doctor that might be?

She doesn't have the answer to the question.

What does anybody know anything around?

Do us a big favor, please, and take a walk.

I'll stay with her.

Good morning.

I'm Doctor Lloyd.

This is Lenny.

What happened to Doctor Anderson?

His shift ended before.

Well, it's viral pneumonia, which comes as no surprise, plenty of it around.

But with any luck, we'll have her home by Christmas.

It's just going to be here a week.

Give or take.

Depends on how she responds to treatment.

We're kind of treatment.

I'll explain everything later.

Try not to worry.

Um, but...

Excuse me.

You, Doctor, too?

No, I'm a nurse.

Oh, yeah?

You're our fifth.

And we've been here less than 24 hours.

This is a nightmare.

Hey.

It's probably harder on you than it is on her.

Mm-hmm.

And don't you worry.

Lenny's here now.

And I treat all my patients as if they were my own.

This treatment is usually a good thing.

But in this case, as you can see, there's been little or no change in the patient.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

It's not a talk to me, please.

Well, she's not responding to the antibiotics as well as we hope she would.

Uh-huh.

We're going to try a new strategy.

I know a strategy like what?

New drugs.

Different mix on the respirator.

I know a strategy like what?

A new strategy.

A new strategy.

A new strategy.

A new strategy.

A new strategy.

New drugs.

Different mix on the respirator.

Technical stuff.

Mm-hmm.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Try not to worry.

He's a dork.

But he's a good doctor.

Then why the hell doesn't he tell me what's going on?

Diagnosing kids is tough.

Sometimes doctors?

Well, so they know for sure they don't like to speculate.

I'm happy Christmas.

Oh, Lanny.

Thank you so much, man.

Hey, what happened to that little boy?

Fasted to a private room.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Oh, I'm sorry.

What?

Merry Christmas.

What's this?

Open it up.

Ah, it can get you everything.

It's just better to give than to receive.

I always though that was a crack,

Thank you.

Merry Christmas, Lenny.

For me.

Thank you.

Like my grandmother always said, you can get more with a kind word and a gift than you

can with just the kind word alone.

And you're the only one who's treated us with the sensitivity that has total neurotic

hysterics deserve.

So, thanks.

Thank you, boy.

Thank you.

And you're not neurotic.

It's just parents.

Kind of wish I saw around him more often.

Hey, how about you let me give you a present?

I've never turned down one yet.

Okay.

The two of you.

Take the night off.

Go out to dinner and then go home and get a good night's sleep before you get sick yourselves.

Come on.

You could leave where you'll be.

You need a break.

Well, I think you might be right.

Okay, but you'll call.

Don't worry.

Lenny's here now.

Thank you.

What?

You've got to go to the hospital.

Honey, honey.

Honey, it was just a dream.

Hello.

Honey.

Honey.

Honey.

Honey.

It was just a dream.

Hello.

Lenny.

Hi, Lenny.

Mm-hmm.

Lenny.

Okay, great.

We'll see you later.

Well, good news.

She's out of the woods.

They're moving her out of the ICU.

No, come on, Lenny.

Let's go.

Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

Now, wait a minute.

Now, did you hear what I said?

Lenny, if you have ever loved me, if you have ever believed in me, now you have to trust

me now.

Right.

What are you talking about?

We can't let him take her out of the ICU.

No one's arguing.

She's not well yet.

But she's out of immediate danger.

And quite frankly, we need the bed for more critical gain.

Critical blue and ventola.

Both lungs just collapsed.

Go.

On!

Oh, go right now!

All right, keep it up!

All right, keep it up!

Go back.

All right.

Go right.

Now.

All right, keep it up!

Come on.

All right, keep it up!

Come on.

Go back.

Be calm.

Go floor.

There you go.

And I've never seen both lungs collapse at once.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. You said she was out of danger.

There was no way to know.

We've intubated and sedated her.

The only thing we can do is wait.

Wait for what? We've heard it dying.

Stop it! Don't say that!

I'm sorry.

Here we go.

Thanks.

Thank you.

What's wrong with our baby?

Look, this is a good hospital with good doctors.

But if that were my logo, I'd get it to you, CRS.

And they have the only one with an ECMO.

What's an ECMO?

Extra-coporeal oxygenation machine.

It could be a heart and lungs while she heals.

So you mean like an iron lung?

A lot more, I think.

If it's available, it might save her.

Do it. Do it now.

Go.

Hey.

Hey, what are you doing here? I just snicked past the centuries.

Yeah, I feel like Benedict Arnold.

I had to tell him I was one of your doctors.

He probably should be.

Hey. Thanks, Lenny. She'll love it.

It's not for hers for you.

Some of your friends called. I told Mitch moved over here.

Okay.

Dr. Moore says you can see me around now.

Look, don't be afraid. It's the best thing for her right now.

Okay. This way.

Why is she so high?

Gravity.

Mom's her dream.

Can I touch her? Sure.

Oh, God.

She's not breathing, Finneh. Her heart's not breathing.

Machines are doing that now.

Come in, please.

Hey.

Hello.

Sorry for the mess.

That's one of my new year's resolutions to clean it up.

Here it is.

We could later.

It's just like home.

Yeah, actually, we were going to publish an amazing called Bad Housekeeping,

but we had trouble lining up advertisers.

Anyway.

So here we are in the intersection.

What's the occasion?

Miranda's coming off the ECMO.

Thank God.

What? What is it?

She has AIDS.

What?

AIDS.

I know how difficult this must be.

Couldn't we have had a few days to believe she was going to be all right?

No. You have to be tested.

And if it's positive, it's best beginning treatment immediately.

You see, that's impossible because we had hundreds of tests when we were trying to get pregnant.

AIDS tests aren't routine.

They probably never ran one.

Look, I'll continue as Miranda's pediatrician, but I want the two of you to see Steven Goodman.

He's a specialist.

Good year.

We're not gay.

We don't have affairs.

We don't ever do drugs.

I had a blood transfusion when I miscarried.

Don't beat yourselves up trying to figure out who's responsible.

You probably never know for sure.

The important thing now is dealing with it.

What about Miranda?

She has pneumocystis carini.

Maybe two months.

Now hold that up there for a few minutes.

Go on.

Oh, it's a tough job.

It'll be a tough job.

It'll be a tough job.

It'll be okay.

I prayed last night, Finn.

You don't pray?

Well, last night I did.

I prayed that it was me, not you.

Dr. Goodman's office?

One more please.

All right.

Both of us?

So what now?

We begin treatment and we educate you.

I want you both to read this.

Become familiar with it.

Live it.

You need to adhere to a strict schedule for medications

and you may have to learn how to give injections.

No rare raw meat, no raw eggs, no sushi, no unwashed fruit or vegetables,

no potato skins.

From now on, you have to be constantly alert to sources of bacteria, infection or viruses.

What, so just boil everything we eat or touch when we talk to our friends on the phone?

Which brings up another issue.

I wouldn't tell anyone right away.

Give yourselves time to adjust.

Last thing you need to deal with right now is rejection.

Our friends love us.

Oh, this can reject us.

I keep turning it over in my mind.

We've had love and happiness, our work, our beautiful Miranda.

Maybe that's why this happened.

Maybe you're not supposed to have all those things in this life.

We haven't lost everything.

We have each other.

It's never going to be a first-day at school.

Or a prom or a wedding or a graduation or a grandchild.

Why don't we do this?

We don't deserve it.

We don't deserve it any more than a hemophiliac or a gay person or Miranda deserves it.

Come on, this isn't some punishment for our sins. It's a virus, you know?

It's just a virus.

How do you know?

Why not because God isn't some vindictive old man holding Kangaroo Court?

You are amazing.

How can you still believe in God?

Because it is the only way that we are going to get through this.

We're not going to get through this.

We're going to dive in it.

You're in the sleep?

No.

I've been thinking.

No.

I've been thinking.

No.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I want to tell our friends.

No, Roxy. Dr. Goodnam was right.

You said if Miranda was well enough to come home and tell them.

She's been fine for three months. I need to talk to someone.

Fine. Dr. Moore gave me the name of that support group. We could talk to them. We could join up.

I don't want to talk about this nightmare with a bunch of six strangers, Finney.

Marvin's a doctor. He can help us.

I don't want to handle this alone.

You are not alone.

You said if Miranda was well enough to come home, we could tell them.

All right, fine.

Laurie and Jack and the Wilkes, and that's it. No one else.

I'm afraid, Finney. I'm afraid to die.

Everybody's going to die, Ross.

Of course I have thought I'd be shot by a jealous husband when I was 90.

What are you doing down here?

What are you doing?

So Amy's home for three weeks.

The day she goes back to school, Jason's teacher calls and he has a chicken pot.

I'm thinking of buying stock in Calamite lotion.

I'm serious. It's driving me crazy.

You have no idea what it's like to deal with a cranky seven-year-old for two weeks.

Well, I mean, I'm sure you do after dealing with pneumonia.

Yeah, I can't believe what you two have been through, really.

Yeah, for a while. We thought you were never going to resurface.

Well, thank God she's okay now.

Is she, Jack, says you guys still have a nurse?

Chocolate, cream, cream, cream.

That is gross.

Oh, man, that was good.

Good enough to eat.

It's to die for. I might even have one later myself.

You think you want to tip?

I can't believe you ordered that. There must be a thousand grams of fat.

Yeah, my doctor said I'm supposed to gain some weight.

Excuse me? Game weight?

Well, actually, I have heard that the Renaissance figure is coming back.

Now, why don't we see my figure in Vogue?

No, why don't we ever have an evening where there are more than two women present

where the conversation doesn't turn to calories?

Or hair? I bet you're 50 bucks sometime before this dinner is over.

They'll talk about their hair.

Oh, I'll take that bet, Marvin.

Well, here's to good friends and good health.

Yeah.

We missed you guys.

Cheers.

Cheers.

Put your glasses down for a second, guys.

We have AIDS.

All three of us.

Okay, what's the punchline?

Oh, my God.

Miranda?

Oh, God.

Come on.

How?

You know, with tuberculosis or hepatitis or even a cold, nobody asks you how.

Marvin, how can you say that?

I'm sorry.

It's better I got it from a blood transfusion than from having sex.

I mean, it's not like there's good AIDS, is there?

I don't know what to say.

Well, how about congratulations.

You never have to worry about graying hair or liver spots.

Oh, baby.

I better go check on Janet.

No, let me.

Oh, my God.

Don't get up.

Nope.

Can you talk about her, Marvin?

Show me 50 bucks.

Good night, Andrew.

I can't believe it.

I can't believe you spent the last half hour comforting them.

I kept waiting for them to say something.

You know, I mean, even some stupid cliche, you know, like, I'm there for you.

I thought they'd be there for us.

I thought they loved us, Finney.

Oh, they do.

It's not their fault.

What are you...

Why are you defending them?

Well, come on, be honest.

If the tables were turned, we'd all react exactly the same way.

They've got kids at their own.

They're scared.

I'm scared.

But I am not going to bail out on you. I'm not.

Me neither.

Did I prove my point?

We absolutely keep it to ourselves.

Oh, how do we tell our friends that their kids are too contagious to come over to the house?

We'll have them boil them in water first.

Hello?

Yeah, right then.

So...

You kidding? That's crazy.

No, well, thanks. No, I appreciate it. Yeah, we'll see you tomorrow.

Fine.

The network picked up the show.

Excellent.

They want six or 13 episodes.

They want 13.

The network loves it.

You know, if this was a month ago, we'd be popping champagne.

We could be planning our trip to Joshua Tree.

Well, we can still go to Joshua Tree.

Oh, what's the point?

You can't just give up, Roxy.

No, really? Well, why not?

Why not? Because we got a lot to be thankful for. That's why.

They told us that you'd never become pregnant and never wrong.

And they told us that Miranda had two months to live and they were wrong.

We have a lot to be thankful for.

The alternative is to curl up and feel sorry for yourself.

Is that how you want to spend the rest of your life?

Hmm?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Hmm?

No.

Mm-hmm.

Tofu's very good.

I don't know if you know that. Tofu's also very good with cookies.

So let's...

You're done to a bottle.

Oh.

Hey, Janet, Jason, hi.

Benny, hi.

Wow, how are you? Look at Miranda.

How's Roxy?

Why don't you call her an esker?

Oh, you know, it's been so busy having the kids around a school.

Yeah, I mean, it's...

Cut the crap, Janet. It's been three months.

Ha!

You were one of her best friends.

Don't abandon her now.

Please.

Bye, Jason.

Okay, well, mostly they feel that there isn't enough comic payoff in the third act, and the Jane character should be punched up.

So...

Those are the network notes.

No, you want mine?

No.

You're going to get them anyway.

So, the structure is good.

Okay, but do you want the truth?

Character and dialogue.

Stink.

I did the structure.

You did not.

She did the dialogue.

I stole it from him.

Okay, okay, but it's not just the notes that concern me.

I mean, you know, we could take care of that in five minutes on the phone, but...

I know Miranda's been sick, but for the past three months, you have an answer to telephone calls.

Yeah.

And you've canceled dinner with Lena and me at least twice.

Listen, I'm so sorry about that, but you know, this parenting thing is a lot harder than we thought.

It's been...

Vinnie, please.

I really don't think that we should...

You know what? We have to go.

Thank you.

Vinnie, please.

Thanks for your notes.

We'll get ready to work on them.

Of course, I'll give you a call sometime next week, all right?

So I just don't want to do this now.

Vinnie, just wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

Will somebody please tell me what the hell is going on here?

David, I'll call you. I promise.

Vinnie?

I'm going up there.

I would like to know who my real friend is.

I'm going up there.

I'm going up there.

I'm going up there.

I'm going up there.

I would like to know who my real friends are now.

I don't have time to waste on the rest.

What about our jobs?

What about medical insurance?

David wouldn't do that.

Oh, really? What if you were wrong?

Huh?

Vinnie, what... what you wait?

Hey, you...

Hey, Louis, pal.

Fine, you won't tell anybody else.

Just don't give shut me out, then.

Come on, come on, come on.

Life is too short for this.

Life's too short period.

Sorry, it looks different.

Yeah, well, the Indians call death crossing the river.

So the other side is...

The happy hunting ground?

Something like that.

I wish I could believe like you, Vinnie.

I don't believe rocks.

I know.

I can't paint with you watching me.

What Vinnie, you think I'm going to steal your secret painting technique?

Uh-huh.

Oh, no.

I'm just curious where would I go if I wanted to sell the secret painting technique?

You play with daddy. See you later, pal.

Hey, rocks.

It's called David, if you want.

You should have told us right away.

Why didn't you tell us?

You thought that...

Well, actually, it was me. I thought that.

You might not want us on the series anymore.

And it seemed like too much of a risk.

Maxie, I'm so sorry.

Vinnie.

As long as I'm around, you'll have a job. You understand?

Mm-hmm.

And you'll always have a friend.

Thanks.

I'll be right back.

Julia Sands.

Pardon me?

Dr. Goodman's office, about six months ago.

Um...

What do you think the odds are having the same disease, same doctor, same hairdresser?

Well, the same hairdresser that is remote.

Hey, you're the only woman I know. And besides me.

I was taking women a lot longer to come out of the closet.

You know, the gay community mobilized ten years ago.

You're just getting started.

You, there are treatments available women don't even know about.

And that's because most of the money for care and research goes to men with AIDS.

I bet, you know, we're not a very vocal group.

Not yet.

Right, V.

Oh, man.

If you want to talk, just call.

I can't see you.

All righty.

Hi.

Hi.

No, it's like he loves my makeup, but he hates my hair.

Or he loves my clothes, but he hates my shoes.

I am charting new depths of insecurity here, Rocky.

So dump them.

I don't know.

Maybe I'm just like too sensitive.

Oh, brother, look who's coming.

Hi, Marvin.

Hi.

Hi, Laurie.

Hi, how you doing?

How are you?

Who are you?

You missed you.

Yeah, well, it's been busy.

No, it worked and school starting soon.

Hey, did you care to join us?

Well, actually I have a friend.

Well, actually I was just going to pick up something to go.

You should know better, Marvin.

You're a doctor.

You can't catch AIDS just by sitting with me.

Rock.

No, Laurie, I want to say this.

Vinnie is your friend.

You're treating him like he's already dead.

I can't handle it.

I'm sorry.

How can you do this to him?

I didn't do this to him.

You did.

Bastard.

Hello.

You should see the stuff I got for your party.

Where's Mom?

Hmm?

Okay.

See ya.

Hey, there you are.

Miranda's wide awake.

She's sitting up in the back.

I got great stuff at the party store.

Mission accomplished.

I got these Groucho Marx glasses.

They're pretty funny.

Honey.

And I got these ice cubes with fish and flies in them.

So, yeah.

It's a matter.

Huh?

Damn.

It's my fault.

What?

All of us have an AIDS. I know it's my fault.

It's nobody's fault.

Why wasn't I more careful?

Why didn't I ask for an AIDS test when we were trying to get pregnant?

Why didn't I do that, Vinnie?

It's not like we'd never slept with other people.

We didn't know. How would we know to do that?

Why did I press feed, Miranda?

She might not have gotten it in the womb.

She might have gotten it.

From my milk.

Why did I do that, Vinnie?

Why didn't my bottle feed her?

Please, please stop this.

What is it?

It's a matter of what's happening.

But, Roxy, if we do this, if we go to this place, we are completely done for.

Listen, we don't know. And maybe we'll never know.

But even if we found out, what does it matter?

You know, I wouldn't let you blame me.

And I'm certainly not going to let you blame yourself.

I'll blame yourself.

I don't know if darling had sleep in Miranda.

It's not me.

It's not me.

It's not you.

I want to be the start.

Now look, it's like Vinnie Cook.

Oh yeah, but I bet he doesn't do the dishes.

Are you kidding? When we go out, she makes me help the waiter.

And when we're at home, he's out of my hand, so there's no need for dishes.

Hi, honey.

Well, he's certainly not eating much.

Are you two on another of your crazy California diets?

You want?

I want to eat that sauce by himself to surprise with me.

It wouldn't dare.

This is my secret recipe.

Oh, my, my.

It's something from posterity.

Justice X, Justice X.

We have come over 3,000 miles, even though I absolutely hate flying.

Miranda, in order to say happy birthday darling, and many, many more.

And a long life, honey.

And good health.

So when are you going to tell them?

Not now.

Vice-Boulder happiness.

There she is.

Hi, Roxie.

Hey, you guys.

Who's that?

He came.

Yeah.

It's a pretty good party.

Yeah.

Of course, you could have tried a little harder to include some more, I don't know,

wealthy, intelligent, available bodacious women.

Jack, if they're intelligent, wealthy, and bodacious tonight, you type.

Oh, really?

And what exactly is my type?

You type?

Golden Retrievers.

German Shepherds.

Merlin.

Here I go.

Hey, Merlin.

Here you go.

Hey, Ben.

Hey, Ben.

I'm going to take Bob and Dad back to the hotel.

I'll take Miranda with me.

I'll see you in 20.

Good luck.

Okay.

She's looking at all this stuff.

It's going to take about 20 years to open it all.

Oh, man, I'm sorry.

That was really stupid.

Relax, relax, relax.

Listen, we never walked on eggshells before.

Let's not start now.

You know what?

I mean it, you know?

I mean, something happens to you and no matter what it is, I mean, you just...

Why, I mean, you just tackle it.

You know, you just deal with it.

You just deal with it.

You're my hero.

Why don't you wait until I'm dead before you make me a martyr?

I'm sorry.

Yeah, I'm trying to deal with it.

What do you think?

What I can't deal with, I try to accept.

And I can accept the fact that I'm going to die.

I can't even accept the fact that...

that Roxy's going to die.

But I can never...

accept that Miranda is going to die without ever having had a chance to live.

I'll never accept that.

See?

Still my hero.

Come on.

Thanks.

Thank you.

I know that sounds crazy, but we're really lucky.

How do you make about three bucks on the cans alone?

No, I'm serious.

You are crazy.

Listen.

Some people live to be a hundred, and they never know the love that we felt in the past eight months.

Mmm.

Mmm.

I have a good idea.

I bought the cans.

Oh, wait.

You have another night like this?

Since...

our honeymoon.

Mmm.

We're mourning.

God, it's after nine.

Party must have done Miranda in.

Who's going to go get her?

Mmm.

Bye.

Bye.

I'll go.

Bitty!

Bitty!

Oh, Dr. Moore.

It's the AZT.

It's been suppressing the virus, but it's caused a severe form of anemia.

We're trying DDI, but she doesn't seem to be absorbed yet.

So what does that mean?

She suffered a form of encephalopathy.

Damaged the brain.

Oh, God.

There's a new hormone that could help.

It increases the release of white blood cells and would tackle the anemia, but so far it's almost impossible to obtain.

What the hell does that mean?

Well, there are problems with new drugs.

FDA approval, research funding, supply...

until there's a greater demand the pharmaceutical companies aren't eager to manufacture.

It was too costly for them.

Too costly?

That's ridiculous.

If there's a drug available that can help my daughter, then we should have it.

I agree.

We'll do what we can.

Well, I'm sorry, but that's just not good enough.

Now, I don't think that we can ever kick the dog.

The animal rights group will bombard the network.

So...

Roxy, come on.

She wouldn't really kick the dog.

This is my belief, remember?

Yeah, but we're going to have to fight for it.

I mean, you really want to have to fight the network ticket.

No, Roxy, come on.

Now, you promised me.

Now, two hours of work and then we'll start going again.

We have to.

We promised, David, that we'd finish the script by Friday.

Well, the senator was in the meeting who should be out now.

Let's just do this and then you can do that.

All right.

It's more important to you.

Finding something that may help our daughter,

or whether we kicked a damn imaginary dog or not.

Okay, so unfair.

We've made hundreds of phone calls in the past couple of weeks.

Well, somebody has to have it and I have to make the call.

We have to do something.

Fine.

You want to do something?

Let's finish the script so that we can have a job next week.

I don't feel like writing!

I don't feel like being funny.

You can kick the dog or not kick the dog.

I don't give a damn.

Fine.

There.

Go ahead.

Hi, this is Roxie Ventalle again.

Yeah, look, I know it's Labor Day weekend.

I would not be asking if it wasn't life or death.

Yeah, it's for my little girl.

Well, there's got to be somebody who can ship it out for God's sakes.

Come on, have a heart.

You will?

That's great.

Thank you.

You're a good man.

Benny?

Hey, Benny?

You're sending the GCSF by overnight courier.

Can you believe it?

The hospital's been telling us for three weeks.

Nobody has it.

Manufacturers had it the whole time.

Hey, Benny, did you hear me?

I've got a lump in my grind.

Dr. Goodman?

Foxy.

Hi.

How is he?

Well, the radiation that came with therapy aren't helping his immune system any, but it's our best option.

What luck, huh?

The top of AIDS has to go and get cancer.

Attitude is nine tenths of the battle here.

He can still have periods of health.

Just don't let him sink into a hole.

Hi.

Hey.

A catered fare.

How was lunch today?

Shh, everyone on the floor wants some.

Yeah.

Yeah?

Thank you.

Mm-hmm.

Thank you.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

I talked to Dr. Goodman out there, and he said the chemotherapy and radiation is...

Ms. Miranda.

Dr. Moore said she did not get the GC-SF hormone in time.

So she probably won't regain any of her motor skills.

But I am the other hand.

I get an incredible upper body strength and developing triceps from lugging her around.

Come on, Finn. Snap out of it.

Oh, why?

Because the alternative is to curl up and feel sorry for yourself.

Now is that how you want to spend the rest of your life, huh? Is it?

You're stealing my dialogue again.

So sue me.

You just better be home by your anniversary or you're in big trouble.

I don't think I'm going to make that up, huh?

You know, if you think you're getting out of it that easy, pal, you are sadly mistaken.

You promised me, Vinny.

You promised me.

You said I would never be alone.

Now just get your sorry ass up out of that bed and get well.

You know, you know what this reminds me of? This reminds me of this game I used to play.

With all of my girlfriends at college.

You told me you didn't have any girlfriends.

But I lied. I had millions of girlfriends. I had more girlfriends than anybody in campus.

What game?

What would you do if you only had a year to live?

You know, like, stop paying all your bills or start skydiving.

I would shave my head.

I moved to Corfu.

I'd probably eat a lot of ice cream on a daily basis.

I'd never get on the treadmill.

I sleep with the aerobics instructor.

Which aerobics instructor?

You know, uh...

I never, anything went wrong with my family.

My mother always used to say, at least you got your health.

I wonder what you'd say now.

At least you got your hair.

Don't leave me, Vinny.

You'll never know, dear.

How much I love you.

Please don't take my sunshine away.

Trick or treat.

Come on.

Trick or treat.

All right, well, don't make it fast. Just treat me like any of the great men.

Okay.

Vinny, put that candy back for the kids.

Quit looking down my shirt.

Trick or treat.

Hey, how's that? Is it okay?

Good. Now, when I go to the door, I want you to put this on,

and I think the IV is really a nice touch.

You don't think that this is scary enough?

Yeah, it's too scary. That's the point.

You're supposed to lie and tell me how good I'm looking.

Oh, you look great, Vin. You do.

And the coupe da gloss.

Oh.

He looks so good.

Okay. All right.

Vinny here. Just...

Get out of the door.

I can't.

Okay. All right. I got you. Come on.

Help mommy get the phone. Okay?

Help me get the phone.

Oh, no.

It's okay. Come on.

We have to say trick or treat.

Trick or treat. Smell my feet. Give me something good to eat.

Oh, cute.

You're late.

Well, excuse me.

So dunk my pay.

She's your friend.

Yeah, you married her.

I'm sorry. Can you take her?

Oh, really?

Come here to the door.

Yes.

Oh, who's at the door, Miranda?

Trick or treat.

Smell my feet.

Trick or treat.

Here you go. Take a treat.

And you see that, Miranda?

Okay.

And I'll angel see the little angel.

Oh, my.

You okay, honey?

You see the little pummo?

Oh, my.

You okay, honey?

You see the little pummo?

Oh, check your cheese.

What excellent outfits.

Hope you're sat there and you're welcome, honey.

Hi.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

You're the pummo?

You're the pummo?

Let's go.

Oh, yeah.

Miranda, do you want one of these?

Do you want one of these little lollies?

Oh, I see. She's already got a lot of candy.

I see.

You want me to take this one from you?

Trick or treat.

Trick or treat.

Hi.

Remember me?

Hi, little baby.

Hi, baby.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Rosie, honey.

It's just a little boy in the store.

Yeah.

Roxy.

Roxy.

Roxy, come on.

No, baby, because I really can't stand it anymore.

I mean, look at this place.

We didn't even have to decorate it or it's already a house of whores.

Look at this.

This isn't so costume.

It's my life.

The only time I ever get out of the house is to go to the doctor or to go to the hospital.

Roxy, stop it.

You can go away from me.

It's all needles and bedpans and blood and diapers and shit and death.

Who's going to take care of me if anyone I'm sick?

Who's going to take care of me if I die?

I'm dying.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Sorry.

Please, baby, I can't take it anymore.

You guys take me out of here?

Please.

Please.

Are we there yet?

Is you get in there?

Don't forget the snake bite, kid.

The National Park snakes, they're nice, Benny.

I can't wait to get back there.

And you go.

All right, Benny, my man.

Oh, looks like we should let me come with you.

No, thanks.

We just need to be a family now.

Just for a few days.

I'm going to get you a little bit.

I'm going to get you a little bit.

I'm going to get you a little bit.

I know.

Just for a few days.

I don't know.

Hey.

Yeah? Wait. One more.

One more.

Okay.

Thank you, guys. Have a good time.

Drive careful.

Hey, Dad.

Have a good time, Dan.

Bye, Miranda.

Bye.

Bye.

Thank you.

Oh, so, Rox, we'll be back.

What? About three o'clock, I think, huh?

Okay.

Hey, guys, what are you doing?

Are you going to stay for dinner?

Yeah, sure.

Vinnie, come on. Let me do this.

Oh, I'm feeling better. Really?

I'm feeling better.

Besides, you've been taking her to the doctor for a year.

It's time I started pulling my weight around here.

Well, there's a lot less of it, so it should be easy.

Come on.

Bye.

See you later.

You guys, you said you'd be back by three.

I know.

I know. It just took a little longer than we thought.

Come here, honey.

Well, tell me what the doctor said.

Hey.

Okay, what's the T-cell count?

Everything's the same.

God, every time she goes to the doctor,

she's a doctor.

I know. I know.

I know. It just took a little longer than we thought.

Come here, honey.

Well, tell me what the doctor said.

Hey.

Okay, what's the T-cell count?

Everything's the same.

God, every time she goes to the doctor,

it's like playing Russian roulette.

I think we get used to it by now.

Oh, I'm going to go.

Do you need me to shop tomorrow?

You're not staying for dinner?

I'll tell you, I'm so exhausted.

Save it for me, okay?

I'll leave it to you.

Good night.

Good night, you guys. Good night, sweetheart.

Night, babe. Thank you.

I know.

It's been a long day, you know?

I'm okay, pal.

Okay.

Okay, pal.

Yay.

Come on, what's up? What did the doctor say?

Nothing. Everything's fine.

I got to go lay down.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Mmm.

Hey, how's that juice?

Pretty good.

These are for Dad.

These are for Dad.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

The soul is your apartment, hon.

The bod is about all I can handle these days.

And what's on the menu tonight?

Something new and exciting, spaghetti.

Spaghetti?

Spaghetti?

I love your spaghetti.

You make about the best gravy in town.

Sauce, Vinny. It's called sauce.

Nobody calls it gravy anymore, but you're right.

It's the best.

Well, that's good, because your appetizers suck.

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny?

Vinny, can you hear me?

Can you hear me?

Oh, my God.

Help!

Help!

Vinny!

Vinny, please!

Help!

Vinny!

Help!

Emergency. Yeah, give me an ambulance.

Vinny!

Do you want something more for the pain, Vinny?

I don't want to sleep yet.

Just talk to me.

I remember the very first time I saw you, Vinny.

We were at Lori's house, and you were standing outside.

And you were staring at me.

And I thought you were so handsome.

The day we moved into the new house, you insisted on carrying me across the threshold.

And strange your back so bad you could hardly walk a picnic in Santa Barbara.

Be got in your sandwich and stung your tongue.

The rest of the day you talk like this.

You're not going there, the first time you met my mom.

You brought out a huge box of candy and the night so much of it yourself you threw up.

I thought it was nerves.

I remember our first flight.

I wanted to put tinsel on the Christmas tree, and you said it was tactful.

You watched the news at five o'clock.

It began at six.

And then at midnight.

When I asked you why, you said you were hoping you'd get better.

God, what an optimist.

Then we went on that camping trip to Yosemite.

The bear ripped the top of your convertible off, because I left those peaches in the trunk.

I was.

Julius with Miranda.

Okay, because I had to come.

Penny.

I do it.

No.

And we drove all the way back to LA with no top in the rain.

She's been talking to him for 12 hours straight.

It's telling the story of their life chapter by chapter.

The best, the very best story is when we found out we were pregnant.

Remember, we were so happy.

We had everything in the adversary money goodbye.

But when we brought Miranda home, we didn't have any diapers.

I can't imagine that. We forgot diapers.

You need to eat Roxy. We can stay with him.

No.

I can give you something.

No, I...

I don't want to leave yet.

It's alright, baby.

You won't go to sleep.

Miranda.

Well, take care of her.

Don't worry, I'll be strong.

And you...

You taught me how to love Finn.

And no matter what, that love never died.

What?

So beautiful.

What? What is it?

I never thought they'd be so beautiful.

What?

Angels.

What do they want?

They want me to go with them.

They want me to go with them.

Then why don't you go?

I'll be okay.

I promise.

I promise.

He's gone.

No.

I'm not sure.

Hi, Julia.

Hi, Lauren.

Hi, Lenny.

I went shopping.

Roxy wanted me to get a dress from Miranda. That's really cute, huh?

Yeah.

Hi, Jack.

Oh.

I have Miranda's dress.

Miranda.

But I have her dress.

I have her dress.

Okay.

Finn and Miranda was dying, didn't they?

That day you took her to the doctor.

He wanted to protect you, Roxy.

He made me promise.

Protect me.

That's why.

That's why he left.

He didn't want to watch her die.

I need to be alone with her now.

I need to be alone with her now.

You are my sunshine.

My only sunshine.

It makes me happy.

When skies are green,

there's no need to be afraid, maybe.

Daddy's gone on ahead to catch you.

He's waiting for us, Miranda.

Just across the river.

The love of God which passes all understanding,

be with you all. Amen.

Vinny was one of my best friends,

and I thought he was such a great guy

that I introduced him to my best friend,

who he then promptly married.

He was talented and warm and warm.

He was very funny.

Vinny was a very spiritual guy.

One day, not that long ago, actually,

we were talking theology and religion,

and finally I said to him,

Vinny, do you ever worry if there's a heaven or a hell waiting for us?

Or if it's just a mindless, vacuous void,

a spiritual black hole?

And he thought about it for a minute,

and he said, what's to worry about?

I have friends in all three places.

Dante wrote,

the love of God,

unutterable and perfect,

flows into a pure soul the way light

rushes into a transparent object.

And I will always think of Vinny and Miranda that way,

the love of God pouring through us

each time that we remember them.

And it's funny in a way

that Vinny was always trying to give me some of his faith,

you know, to make me believe.

Well, Vinny,

whatever you are,

I don't just believe,

now I know.

And I've learned that

when you really, truly can't change a bad situation,

the only thing you can do is change yourself.

You know, Vinny was right.

And the moment we're born,

we're all dying.

And for most of us,

it's like some silent digital watch

that we never had to do.

And for me,

it's like a great day.

Like some silent digital watch

that we never really look at.

But for me,

for people like me,

it's allowed to king clock.

Reminding us not to waste one precious moment that's left.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

But for me,

it's just like a great day.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

And I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.

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I'm not going to be able to do that.

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I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that.