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1
00:00:03,900 --> 00:00:03,900
THE SPIES WHO CAME IN
FROM THE SEMI-COLD
2
00:00:30,574 --> 00:00:31,714
Come in.
3
00:01:19,594 --> 00:01:22,194
A new batch of exploding girls is ready,
Doctor.
4
00:01:22,194 --> 00:01:24,714
What a fabulous machine I've invented,
5
00:01:24,714 --> 00:01:27,434
it does everything automatically,
6
00:01:27,434 --> 00:01:29,994
when we used to do it all by hand.
7
00:01:31,869 --> 00:01:34,189
Perfect. Hardjob,
8
00:01:34,189 --> 00:01:36,589
the pressure gauge, please.
9
00:01:36,589 --> 00:01:38,539
Fantastic!
10
00:01:39,309 --> 00:01:40,659
Let's see.
11
00:01:43,224 --> 00:01:46,454
Plastic injection fine tuning.
12
00:01:47,544 --> 00:01:49,134
- Check.
- Excellent.
13
00:01:49,224 --> 00:01:51,294
Engage circuit.
14
00:01:51,744 --> 00:01:53,934
Circuit engaged.
15
00:01:56,299 --> 00:01:57,849
Contact!
16
00:02:33,764 --> 00:02:36,394
They look so real, don't they?
17
00:02:36,604 --> 00:02:41,724
In fact, they're a diabolical creation,
a product of my scientific genius.
18
00:02:41,724 --> 00:02:45,439
Each of these beauties
is equipped with a little device...
19
00:02:45,439 --> 00:02:47,999
which in our profession...
20
00:02:47,999 --> 00:02:49,599
or rather, my profession...
21
00:02:49,599 --> 00:02:51,399
is known as the Kiss of Death.
22
00:02:51,399 --> 00:02:54,318
A touch from their lips
that has more pressure...
23
00:02:54,318 --> 00:02:58,514
than an innocent kiss completes a
circuit and... bang!
24
00:02:58,514 --> 00:03:03,474
A glorious explosion that will destroy
my lovely creations...
25
00:03:03,474 --> 00:03:05,514
along with their victims.
26
00:03:05,514 --> 00:03:07,499
Why am I doing all this?
27
00:03:08,389 --> 00:03:10,309
It's quite simple really.
28
00:03:10,309 --> 00:03:11,659
You see...
29
00:03:11,909 --> 00:03:13,789
I've made a deal
with my Chinese friends,
30
00:03:13,789 --> 00:03:17,509
we're going to share control
of the entire planet.
31
00:03:17,509 --> 00:03:22,304
And what of America and Russia?
Two obstacles to be removed.
32
00:03:22,304 --> 00:03:24,864
To begin with,
my lovely exploding girls
33
00:03:24,864 --> 00:03:27,544
will eliminate
certain annoying generals.
34
00:03:27,544 --> 00:03:30,939
Then, when the only survivor
is General Willis...
35
00:03:30,939 --> 00:03:32,659
my plan will move into it's final phase.
36
00:03:32,659 --> 00:03:36,889
A simple one, as the general
looks exactly like me.
37
00:03:37,539 --> 00:03:40,369
An incredibly charming man.
38
00:03:55,649 --> 00:03:57,169
We should get a move on,
39
00:03:57,169 --> 00:04:00,039
we must go into action, duty calls.
40
00:04:00,169 --> 00:04:04,439
- Let it call.
- Show some respect for that uniform.
41
00:04:04,969 --> 00:04:08,164
An agent should always be ready.
- I am ready!
42
00:04:08,164 --> 00:04:11,434
- Will you be serious!
- Leave me alone.
43
00:04:13,204 --> 00:04:14,674
Who's that?
44
00:04:14,844 --> 00:04:17,044
Ciccio! A Chinese man.
45
00:04:17,044 --> 00:04:20,819
- Who, him? Just a tourist.
- He looks Chinese.
46
00:04:21,279 --> 00:04:23,119
- Come on, let's go.
- Where to?
47
00:04:23,119 --> 00:04:27,469
- Let's go, he's watching us.
- Is someone watching?
48
00:04:59,864 --> 00:05:02,214
Hey, where are you going?
49
00:05:05,024 --> 00:05:06,459
- Stop.
- What is it?
50
00:05:06,459 --> 00:05:08,819
- I think we're being followed.
- The Chinese man?
51
00:05:08,819 --> 00:05:11,739
Chinese or not, we have to confront him.
You remember our instructions?
52
00:05:11,739 --> 00:05:15,089
- Of course, Orsa Major force.
- Show me.
53
00:05:18,494 --> 00:05:21,534
The Chinese man, not me.
- Alright!
54
00:05:21,534 --> 00:05:25,004
- Let's hide.
- You hide me, I'll hide you.
55
00:05:26,414 --> 00:05:27,554
Come on.
56
00:05:33,489 --> 00:05:35,439
Hear anything?
57
00:05:35,849 --> 00:05:37,759
We must use our ears.
58
00:05:38,809 --> 00:05:40,159
Your ears!
59
00:05:41,409 --> 00:05:44,284
Can you hear anything?
- Chinese footsteps.
60
00:05:44,284 --> 00:05:46,204
- What shall we do?
- We need a plan.
61
00:05:46,204 --> 00:05:47,284
Which one?
62
00:05:47,284 --> 00:05:49,604
- Plan 5 time 8 is 24.
- Fine.
63
00:05:49,604 --> 00:05:51,074
Let's move.
64
00:05:52,044 --> 00:05:53,594
Careful.
65
00:05:54,004 --> 00:05:55,469
Be careful.
66
00:05:59,079 --> 00:06:00,709
He's coming.
67
00:06:01,719 --> 00:06:03,189
Let's hide.
68
00:06:15,354 --> 00:06:16,704
Well done.
69
00:06:19,149 --> 00:06:22,099
Mission accomplished.
70
00:06:22,989 --> 00:06:25,019
But...
- What is it?
71
00:06:25,629 --> 00:06:28,589
- I thought he was Chinese?
- Must be plastic surgery.
72
00:06:28,589 --> 00:06:31,064
True, the Chinese
are masters of disguise.
73
00:06:31,064 --> 00:06:33,664
In or out of disguise,
he's still Chinese.
74
00:06:33,664 --> 00:06:37,734
- The countdown's over, time to go.
- Let's move.
75
00:07:02,774 --> 00:07:04,124
After you.
76
00:07:05,974 --> 00:07:08,889
It's 7:30. Next time you're late,
you can find another job.
77
00:07:08,889 --> 00:07:13,829
- It's the Chinese man's fault.
- Quiet. Guests are coming.
78
00:07:14,009 --> 00:07:16,809
- Good evening.
- Welcome.
79
00:07:16,809 --> 00:07:20,424
- Thank you.
- The ladies' coat, please.
80
00:07:27,764 --> 00:07:32,279
- A world of luxury we'll never know.
- We won't be doormen for ever.
81
00:07:32,279 --> 00:07:35,599
That's why we're taking classes
in espionage.
82
00:07:35,599 --> 00:07:37,199
Once we get that diploma,
83
00:07:37,199 --> 00:07:40,149
we'll be able to say we're in the FBA.
84
00:07:40,559 --> 00:07:43,594
Kidnapping, extortion, secret formulas,
Chinese spies...
85
00:07:43,594 --> 00:07:46,074
We'll know all about it!
- Women too!
86
00:07:46,074 --> 00:07:48,794
Women have a secret passion
for secret agents.
87
00:07:48,794 --> 00:07:52,494
- How do you know?
- Study. Watch the movies.
88
00:07:53,194 --> 00:07:56,229
By the way, our fourth lesson
has arrived.
89
00:07:56,229 --> 00:07:58,549
- You didn't tell me. What does it say?
- Let me see.
90
00:07:58,549 --> 00:08:00,709
This is a curate's pen.
- A what?
91
00:08:00,709 --> 00:08:04,389
- Black curate, it's poison.
- You mean curare.
92
00:08:04,389 --> 00:08:08,464
- You just press this button, and...
- Careful. You could kill me.
93
00:08:08,464 --> 00:08:11,584
Isn't there a manual with it?
- Sure, here it is.
94
00:08:11,584 --> 00:08:14,024
But I can't read it.
- Why not?
95
00:08:14,024 --> 00:08:16,054
I forgot my glasses.
96
00:08:17,144 --> 00:08:19,739
To have curare delivered to you,
send another 10,000 lire
97
00:08:19,739 --> 00:08:23,049
enclosing a valid prescription.
98
00:08:33,174 --> 00:08:36,714
Here I am, Dr Golfoot,
just as you ordered.
99
00:08:37,414 --> 00:08:41,014
- Well done Fong.
- The general will be here soon.
100
00:08:41,014 --> 00:08:43,369
We will observe him closely.
101
00:08:43,369 --> 00:08:46,849
- She's the cloakroom girl.
- No, not at all!
102
00:08:46,849 --> 00:08:48,239
She's a copy.
103
00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:52,599
Your job is to take care
of the real one.
104
00:08:54,208 --> 00:08:55,834
This way my dear.
105
00:08:56,564 --> 00:08:58,404
That's right, this way.
106
00:08:58,404 --> 00:08:59,544
Let's go.
107
00:09:02,604 --> 00:09:05,124
Careful with the pen, it's dangerous.
108
00:09:05,124 --> 00:09:06,749
More guests.
109
00:09:08,159 --> 00:09:10,319
Welcome.
- Good evening.
110
00:09:10,319 --> 00:09:11,669
Thank you.
111
00:09:20,034 --> 00:09:22,264
She didn't feel a thing!
112
00:09:26,434 --> 00:09:28,464
Where are you going?
113
00:09:34,069 --> 00:09:37,099
I'm sorry.
Welcome, thank you.
114
00:09:37,829 --> 00:09:39,179
Thank you.
115
00:09:46,224 --> 00:09:49,694
- What have I done?
- I can't die by the pen!
116
00:09:59,339 --> 00:10:01,129
The Chinese guy!
117
00:10:02,019 --> 00:10:03,569
Stop it. Let me.
118
00:10:04,899 --> 00:10:07,004
For you, for me? For him!
119
00:10:46,119 --> 00:10:50,829
- The manager!
- Mission accomplished. Retreat!
120
00:11:15,669 --> 00:11:18,149
This man is dangerous,
we must interrogate him.
121
00:11:18,149 --> 00:11:21,894
He has to talk.
- I don't think that's likely.
122
00:11:22,304 --> 00:11:25,574
He's faking!
We're smarter than he is.
123
00:11:25,784 --> 00:11:29,624
We'll tie him up and
question him after our shift.
124
00:11:29,624 --> 00:11:33,889
Good idea.
Even unconscious, he's still Chinese.
125
00:11:52,294 --> 00:11:53,644
Thank you.
126
00:12:02,449 --> 00:12:03,589
Do it now.
127
00:12:23,679 --> 00:12:25,469
Quick, hurry up.
128
00:12:33,194 --> 00:12:34,864
Time to go to work.
129
00:13:09,019 --> 00:13:13,289
This one's so angry,
I think he's going to explode.
130
00:13:16,819 --> 00:13:17,929
I told you!
131
00:13:29,334 --> 00:13:33,609
This is pseudo-acrylic acid.
Dr Golfoot's favourite explosive.
132
00:13:33,609 --> 00:13:37,169
- Who is this Coldfeet?
- The most evil man alive.
133
00:13:37,169 --> 00:13:41,449
A heartless killer, who's already tried
to take over the world.
134
00:13:41,449 --> 00:13:45,284
Sure. That explosion
obviously drove you mad.
135
00:13:45,284 --> 00:13:49,324
I have to contact Colonel Benson
of the SIC at once.
136
00:13:49,324 --> 00:13:51,684
- Hurry up, untie me.
- Who's SIC?
137
00:13:51,684 --> 00:13:56,399
- Security Intelligence Command.
- He's a secret agent!
138
00:13:56,399 --> 00:13:59,279
Secret agent?
How do we know he isn't Chinese,
139
00:13:59,279 --> 00:14:01,799
disguised as an American,
so we think he's an American
140
00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:05,559
and not Chinese
so we don't know he's an agent!
141
00:14:05,559 --> 00:14:08,274
True! I hadn't thought of that.
Where's your identification?
142
00:14:08,274 --> 00:14:12,624
- In my wallet. Back pocket.
- With your permission.
143
00:14:14,994 --> 00:14:16,134
Here.
144
00:14:18,034 --> 00:14:19,469
It's horrible!
145
00:14:19,469 --> 00:14:24,179
- What does it say?
- I've forgotten my glasses, read it.
146
00:14:24,469 --> 00:14:28,619
- It's true! Bill Dexter, secret agent.
- Like us!
147
00:14:30,269 --> 00:14:32,614
Wait. Mr Agent, please!
148
00:14:33,944 --> 00:14:37,894
Take us with you!
We'll make a good impression.
149
00:14:39,904 --> 00:14:43,539
It's not easy being a secret agent.
You need bravery, intelligence.
150
00:14:43,539 --> 00:14:46,659
You need to speak
four foreign languages.
151
00:14:46,659 --> 00:14:49,809
That's me! I've studied languages.
152
00:14:50,739 --> 00:14:56,084
I know dialects from Palermo, Catania,
Syracuse, everywhere!
153
00:14:57,814 --> 00:15:00,774
Know why he doesn't speak Chinese?
He's never studied it.
154
00:15:00,774 --> 00:15:05,324
He's great with disguises.
Do you remember Fregoli?
155
00:15:06,609 --> 00:15:09,209
He's even better than him.
Show him what you can do.
156
00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:13,439
Here I go. Attention please.
Transformation!
157
00:15:37,159 --> 00:15:39,189
He's good, isn't he?
158
00:15:41,359 --> 00:15:45,864
The boss will be giving you a few tips.
Pay attention.
159
00:15:47,154 --> 00:15:50,224
They'll be of great use.
- This is it.
160
00:15:54,074 --> 00:15:58,149
Young students, you are studying
to be secret agents
161
00:15:58,149 --> 00:16:01,789
and to take on secret missions...
- Ask who that is.
162
00:16:01,789 --> 00:16:03,059
Who is that?
163
00:16:03,509 --> 00:16:06,904
He's Colonel Benson.
He runs SIC, and is an old friend.
164
00:16:06,904 --> 00:16:09,204
I didn't understand.
165
00:16:09,384 --> 00:16:14,094
And I say again, the future of the world
depends on you...
166
00:16:16,464 --> 00:16:19,819
He's very good,
we've worked together many times.
167
00:16:19,819 --> 00:16:21,289
One moment.
168
00:16:23,819 --> 00:16:26,489
Hello there!
- Oh, it's you.
169
00:16:27,139 --> 00:16:30,259
Still here? I thought you'd been fired.
170
00:16:30,259 --> 00:16:33,534
Colonel, it's urgent.
I must speak with you privately.
171
00:16:33,534 --> 00:16:36,414
I can prove that Dr Gold foot has...
- Speak up man!
172
00:16:36,414 --> 00:16:39,684
It's rude to whisper in front of others.
173
00:16:40,734 --> 00:16:42,639
He's still alive!
174
00:16:43,089 --> 00:16:44,719
Dr Goldfoot?
175
00:16:45,729 --> 00:16:49,169
Wait in my office. I'll meet you there
when I've finished.
176
00:16:49,169 --> 00:16:51,679
Now pay close attention.
177
00:16:52,249 --> 00:16:54,199
Is that a secret sign?
178
00:16:55,004 --> 00:16:59,674
Head down to personnel,
they'll take all your details.
179
00:17:02,764 --> 00:17:07,029
Here are your data cards.
Pin them to your jackets.
180
00:17:08,079 --> 00:17:11,439
- I'd give anything to have one.
- Are they hard to get?
181
00:17:11,439 --> 00:17:14,709
Practically impossible.
182
00:17:21,114 --> 00:17:22,904
These are for you.
183
00:17:24,874 --> 00:17:26,664
Students!
184
00:17:28,994 --> 00:17:31,859
Attention! One, two, one, two.
185
00:17:34,709 --> 00:17:35,849
We're in!
186
00:17:41,869 --> 00:17:46,304
- What do you want, Bill?
- Four NATO generals have been killed...
187
00:17:46,304 --> 00:17:50,374
One was blown up this evening,
I was right there!
188
00:17:51,064 --> 00:17:54,729
I've heard, but I don't see
where you fit in.
189
00:17:56,539 --> 00:17:58,839
You no longer work for SIC.
190
00:17:59,339 --> 00:18:01,849
You like the ladies too much.
191
00:18:02,779 --> 00:18:07,324
I saw Goldfoot in the same place
that the general died.
192
00:18:08,094 --> 00:18:10,014
Your imagining things.
193
00:18:10,014 --> 00:18:11,924
I'm not, colonel.
194
00:18:12,214 --> 00:18:14,774
Is this what you came to tell me?
195
00:18:17,374 --> 00:18:19,209
Yes sir, exactly.
196
00:18:19,209 --> 00:18:24,209
It's sad, Bill. You'd do anything
to get back into the agency.
197
00:18:24,209 --> 00:18:28,049
You'd even invent a story
about Goldfoot being alive.
198
00:18:28,049 --> 00:18:30,608
That won't fool me, do you hear?
199
00:18:34,684 --> 00:18:38,954
Are you mad? This is a direct line
to the president.
200
00:18:46,519 --> 00:18:49,669
Hallo?
Yes, Mr President, it's me.
201
00:18:51,679 --> 00:18:54,478
About the generals? Bombs?
202
00:18:54,478 --> 00:18:57,354
Surely, it's just a coincidence?
203
00:18:57,354 --> 00:19:00,424
Yes, sir. We're doing all that we can.
204
00:19:00,674 --> 00:19:03,544
Yes, sir. Even the impossible.
205
00:19:04,274 --> 00:19:08,139
Yes, president. The impossible.
As you wish.
206
00:19:13,549 --> 00:19:18,774
I'm going to see my little friends,
it's their breakfast time.
207
00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:26,664
How are we today, little fishes?
Are you hungry?
208
00:19:26,664 --> 00:19:31,209
I've got a nice steak for you,
the way you like it. Rare.
209
00:19:33,179 --> 00:19:35,479
Come on, boys. Throw it in.
210
00:19:53,134 --> 00:19:55,409
What? Thirty seconds?
211
00:19:55,409 --> 00:19:59,849
That's not good enough.
We'll have to starve them for longer!
212
00:19:59,849 --> 00:20:04,919
I want them to eat that much
in the standard time, 25 seconds.
213
00:20:13,524 --> 00:20:15,314
Please, come in.
214
00:20:17,924 --> 00:20:19,949
Please, have a seat.
215
00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:26,029
Gentlemen, this is...
216
00:20:27,519 --> 00:20:30,109
perhaps I should read this.
217
00:20:30,638 --> 00:20:33,224
This meeting is top secret.
218
00:20:34,394 --> 00:20:38,904
This room is completely secure .
Here, we're safe...
219
00:20:40,394 --> 00:20:43,949
from microphones, recorders,
and cunning spies.
220
00:20:43,949 --> 00:20:47,099
No-one can observe us or eavesdrop.
221
00:20:49,429 --> 00:20:52,699
Please turn your attention to this map.
222
00:20:53,429 --> 00:20:57,694
There have been bombings
in all the NATO capitals,
223
00:20:57,864 --> 00:21:03,334
the targets were all generals involved
in maneuvers this June.
224
00:21:03,544 --> 00:21:06,613
Is there a link between these events?
225
00:21:07,059 --> 00:21:11,209
If there is, our Secret Service
will discover it.
226
00:21:15,259 --> 00:21:19,524
As you know, we have hundreds
of highly trained men
227
00:21:21,214 --> 00:21:24,164
The results of years of training.
228
00:21:24,454 --> 00:21:28,294
Highly efficient operatives,
ready for anything.
229
00:21:28,294 --> 00:21:33,559
However, there should not be
human error in selecting agents.
230
00:21:36,769 --> 00:21:39,839
I can make a mistake, but Rita cannot.
231
00:21:41,369 --> 00:21:45,234
- Who is Rita?
- Rita is IBM's latest computer,
232
00:21:46,884 --> 00:21:49,674
The pride of your industries.
233
00:21:50,684 --> 00:21:51,824
Right.
234
00:21:55,279 --> 00:21:57,789
Miss Rosanna, after you.
235
00:22:06,279 --> 00:22:10,824
Gentlemen, this is Rita.
Rita, meet these gentlemen.
236
00:22:14,434 --> 00:22:17,264
Data cards for all our agents...
237
00:22:18,673 --> 00:22:21,819
have already been added to her memory.
238
00:22:24,109 --> 00:22:26,909
In a few seconds, Rita will select...
239
00:22:26,909 --> 00:22:30,608
their various skills and abilities...
240
00:22:31,464 --> 00:22:35,814
deciding automatically
the best agent for the job.
241
00:22:37,744 --> 00:22:40,414
May I? I'd like to press a button.
242
00:22:41,024 --> 00:22:43,319
This one.
- Of course.
243
00:22:46,539 --> 00:22:50,809
Gentlemen, we make mistakes,
but machines don't.
244
00:22:51,419 --> 00:22:53,689
That's what he thinks!
245
00:23:12,009 --> 00:23:13,149
Done!
246
00:23:20,284 --> 00:23:22,194
Right, let's see.
247
00:23:22,284 --> 00:23:23,594
477 and 478.
248
00:23:43,674 --> 00:23:46,394
- You're here too?
- That's right.
249
00:23:46,394 --> 00:23:49,344
There's lots of great stuff here.
250
00:23:50,554 --> 00:23:54,224
I've heard this is great.
Have you tried it?
251
00:23:54,354 --> 00:23:57,619
I prefer something a little lighter.
252
00:24:03,629 --> 00:24:07,934
A grenade with a short fuse.
- The kind I like to use!
253
00:24:11,024 --> 00:24:13,464
Would you pass me a Breda
- Which type?
254
00:24:13,464 --> 00:24:16,694
Why, a Breda.
- You're shameless.
255
00:24:19,819 --> 00:24:22,889
- I'll take an 84.
- With pleasure.
256
00:24:29,139 --> 00:24:33,444
What nature creates, Ciccio takes.
- Oh, very good!
257
00:24:40,774 --> 00:24:42,404
Now that's a gun!
258
00:24:49,889 --> 00:24:52,639
TNT! My secret ingredient.
259
00:24:55,124 --> 00:24:57,634
Sicilian gelatine.
260
00:25:01,124 --> 00:25:03,634
Pistachio flavour!
261
00:25:05,684 --> 00:25:07,979
Delicious, try some.
262
00:25:16,519 --> 00:25:19,704
I'm so sorry! Commander, forgive us.
263
00:25:19,994 --> 00:25:22,504
Why the dark expression?
264
00:25:23,434 --> 00:25:27,744
Dear chaps, my thirty year career
is in your hands.
265
00:25:28,954 --> 00:25:32,099
To think that my future depends on you!
266
00:25:35,109 --> 00:25:37,939
For a start, no weapons.
- What?
267
00:25:38,469 --> 00:25:41,549
Not even a machine gun?
- Nothing.
268
00:25:41,549 --> 00:25:43,054
Come this way.
269
00:25:45,464 --> 00:25:48,534
A true secret agent doesn't use guns.
270
00:25:50,704 --> 00:25:53,624
The bulge in your jacket
would give you away
271
00:25:53,624 --> 00:25:55,569
Instead...
272
00:25:55,939 --> 00:25:58,809
A spy uses cunning.
- Cunning?
273
00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:04,129
A bit of milk never hurt.
274
00:26:05,379 --> 00:26:07,524
But a chop to the neck does!
275
00:26:09,774 --> 00:26:12,924
We're the best! The wicked get no rest.
276
00:26:15,134 --> 00:26:17,044
Excellent!
277
00:26:21,569 --> 00:26:23,369
What's he doing?
278
00:26:23,369 --> 00:26:26,719
Easy now, boss.
- Secret agents...
279
00:26:28,089 --> 00:26:30,279
must know how to suffer,
280
00:26:31,684 --> 00:26:34,834
they must be able to take pain!
- Pain?
281
00:26:36,924 --> 00:26:39,594
I've fought with an octopus,
282
00:26:40,244 --> 00:26:42,909
I can handle a hippopotamus.
283
00:26:42,999 --> 00:26:46,079
- What hippopotamus?
- You! Here's my hand.
284
00:26:46,079 --> 00:26:48,349
That tickles! Come on!
285
00:26:52,879 --> 00:26:56,904
It's incredible! Fantastic!
Shake my hand!
286
00:27:22,184 --> 00:27:24,534
This won't take a second.
287
00:27:26,864 --> 00:27:30,014
- No photos!
- How dare you? My camera!
288
00:27:30,184 --> 00:27:33,009
Give me my camera.
- Calm down.
289
00:27:34,699 --> 00:27:38,369
- Do you know who we are?
- No. - Lucky for you.
290
00:27:39,379 --> 00:27:40,769
Look who it is.
291
00:27:42,459 --> 00:27:44,084
Hello there!
292
00:27:48,134 --> 00:27:49,654
I'm glad I found you.
293
00:27:49,654 --> 00:27:52,094
Listen carefully.
We must join forces.
294
00:27:52,094 --> 00:27:53,694
Only I can tell you...
295
00:27:53,694 --> 00:27:56,569
where to find the bomber, Dr Goldfoot.
296
00:27:56,569 --> 00:28:00,129
- I'd rather eat my sandwich.
- Interesting. Where is he?
297
00:28:00,129 --> 00:28:03,729
My investigations show
that he's renting a villa...
298
00:28:03,729 --> 00:28:05,129
on the Appian Way.
299
00:28:05,129 --> 00:28:07,084
It has a large basement.
300
00:28:07,084 --> 00:28:12,204
He's storing a lot of plastic materials.
You know what that means?
301
00:28:12,204 --> 00:28:15,114
- Not a clue!
- But it's obvious.
302
00:28:15,964 --> 00:28:19,679
All the generals were killed by
exploding plastic dummies...
303
00:28:19,679 --> 00:28:22,559
that looked like real women.
Dr Goldfoot makes them in that villa!
304
00:28:22,559 --> 00:28:26,909
We have to stop him.
- Dr Goldfoot? Exploding women?
305
00:28:27,359 --> 00:28:30,599
You're inventing it all
so you can join the FBI.
306
00:28:30,599 --> 00:28:34,434
- And you sound like Benson!
- He told us to speak to no-one.
307
00:28:34,434 --> 00:28:36,894
And above all not to trust you!
308
00:28:37,274 --> 00:28:40,194
So you won't use me on this mission?
309
00:28:40,194 --> 00:28:44,709
- It's our case, we'll deal with it.
- We'll use ourselves!
310
00:28:44,709 --> 00:28:45,849
Fine!
311
00:28:46,069 --> 00:28:51,349
I'll talk to Rosanna, she'll convince
Benson to give me the case.
312
00:28:51,349 --> 00:28:53,589
I'll show you.
- Go ahead!
313
00:28:53,589 --> 00:28:57,464
We've trained, you know!
We studied at the Post Office.
314
00:28:57,464 --> 00:28:59,504
Enough of your distractions!
315
00:28:59,504 --> 00:29:02,904
- Actually, he's right.
- So why didn't you tell him?
316
00:29:02,904 --> 00:29:06,144
- The time's not right.
- I prefer The Daily News.
317
00:29:06,144 --> 00:29:07,649
I mean timing!
318
00:29:08,059 --> 00:29:12,969
I've memorized the map.
We'll go to the villa without him.
319
00:29:13,059 --> 00:29:16,419
We'll stop him, reveal his identity
and arrest him.
320
00:29:16,419 --> 00:29:19,804
Ciccio, compared to you,
I'm a small spy.
321
00:29:20,654 --> 00:29:23,804
This Bill Dexter is making me nervous.
322
00:29:24,414 --> 00:29:25,884
You know what?
323
00:29:26,254 --> 00:29:29,324
I have to get my hands on this Rosanna.
324
00:29:30,494 --> 00:29:33,759
Incredible. You have a heart after all!
325
00:29:34,849 --> 00:29:39,969
Don't be ridiculous, Fong.
I need her so I can duplicate her.
326
00:30:04,839 --> 00:30:08,474
- Trespassers in the garden.
- Excellent.
327
00:30:08,474 --> 00:30:11,224
Those two idiots are just in time.
328
00:30:11,794 --> 00:30:14,464
Chun Lai, feed the piranhas.
329
00:30:20,189 --> 00:30:23,429
This place looks uninhabited.
Seems innocent to me.
330
00:30:23,429 --> 00:30:27,469
- Bill said this was the place.
- So either he's wrong or we are.
331
00:30:27,469 --> 00:30:30,149
Do you have a hypothesis?
What are you doing?
332
00:30:30,149 --> 00:30:32,184
- I left it at home.
- Do you have any ideas?
333
00:30:32,184 --> 00:30:34,054
Let's look for him.
334
00:31:10,969 --> 00:31:14,479
Franco! Where are you?
What are you doing?
335
00:31:14,649 --> 00:31:17,329
- A water feature!
- It's hardly the time.
336
00:31:17,329 --> 00:31:21,594
I mean a pool! With water and fishes.
Come and look.
337
00:31:24,964 --> 00:31:27,314
- Where is it?
- This way.
338
00:31:33,959 --> 00:31:35,069
Come on.
339
00:31:35,959 --> 00:31:39,639
Look, what a lovely pool!
The water's clean too.
340
00:31:39,639 --> 00:31:42,279
You know what? I'm going to bathe.
- What?
341
00:31:42,279 --> 00:31:47,434
You're mad, we're in May.
- I haven't had a bath since last May!
342
00:31:47,434 --> 00:31:51,784
- And you caught a cold.
- Okay, I'll check the water.
343
00:31:52,234 --> 00:31:54,024
Give me your hand.
344
00:31:56,509 --> 00:31:59,259
Something's eaten my shoe!
345
00:32:02,069 --> 00:32:03,209
Let me see.
346
00:32:07,344 --> 00:32:10,934
- Who was that?
- Another bather? - Look!
347
00:32:11,864 --> 00:32:15,734
He can't swim, he's drowning.
Let's help him.
348
00:32:17,304 --> 00:32:20,249
Come closer, reach out your hand!
349
00:32:23,059 --> 00:32:26,089
Ciccio! A swimming skeleton!
350
00:32:31,494 --> 00:32:33,454
- Which way?
- Where's the exit?
351
00:32:33,454 --> 00:32:35,684
Over that wall, come on.
352
00:32:36,014 --> 00:32:37,494
Yikes! The Bengal Lancers.
353
00:32:37,494 --> 00:32:38,764
Wait for me!
354
00:32:42,054 --> 00:32:44,879
- Wait!
- We're being shot at!
355
00:32:58,204 --> 00:33:01,724
Commander! We found the plastic villa.
The villa with the plastic!
356
00:33:01,724 --> 00:33:04,164
And spears that come out of the wall!
357
00:33:04,164 --> 00:33:06,204
And Chinese assassins!
358
00:33:06,204 --> 00:33:09,269
Carnivorous fish! Look at my shoe!
359
00:33:11,159 --> 00:33:12,799
What should we do?
360
00:33:12,799 --> 00:33:14,909
Maybe Bill was right.
361
00:33:15,199 --> 00:33:18,229
Red alert! Prepare all agents. Go!
362
00:33:21,394 --> 00:33:25,264
I hope to God for your sakes
that you're right.
363
00:33:27,474 --> 00:33:29,634
- Hallo?
- Road block seven here,
364
00:33:29,634 --> 00:33:33,229
Military vehicles are on their way,
should we open fire?
365
00:33:33,229 --> 00:33:35,019
No, let them pass.
366
00:33:38,909 --> 00:33:40,129
Plan four B.
367
00:33:43,424 --> 00:33:45,774
SALVATION COLLEGE
368
00:33:52,464 --> 00:33:53,604
Halt!
369
00:33:54,939 --> 00:33:59,009
Just a moment! I'm in charge,
I'll shout 'halt'!
370
00:33:59,819 --> 00:34:01,769
Company, halt!
371
00:34:09,334 --> 00:34:10,884
Careful!
372
00:34:12,774 --> 00:34:14,844
Prepare to attack.
373
00:34:20,129 --> 00:34:21,919
Is this the villa?
374
00:34:22,529 --> 00:34:24,879
It looks like a college to me.
375
00:34:47,879 --> 00:34:50,829
- Excuse me.
- Take a break girls.
376
00:34:51,199 --> 00:34:55,114
Good morning general.
- Good morning Mother Superior
377
00:34:55,114 --> 00:34:58,994
- To what do we owe this honour?
- We'd like to visit the villa.
378
00:34:58,994 --> 00:35:00,384
By all means.
379
00:35:02,474 --> 00:35:07,349
From their clothes, I'd say
these men are archeologists.
380
00:35:07,349 --> 00:35:11,269
If they're interested
in classic figures...
381
00:35:11,269 --> 00:35:14,339
Not those figures. The ones up there.
382
00:35:14,589 --> 00:35:19,424
One of the oldest buildings here,
it's from the 11th century.
383
00:35:19,424 --> 00:35:24,094
Are you here to enroll a niece perhaps?
- Well, you see...
384
00:35:25,144 --> 00:35:28,214
Actually, we'd like to see your pool.
385
00:35:31,059 --> 00:35:33,809
That's it! The pool with the...
386
00:35:35,499 --> 00:35:37,099
The pyramid fish.
387
00:35:37,099 --> 00:35:39,529
We love our little fishes.
388
00:35:40,219 --> 00:35:42,739
It's not the season for swimming...
389
00:35:42,739 --> 00:35:47,484
so we keep goldfish in there.
The girls love to feed them.
390
00:35:49,254 --> 00:35:53,804
- Yeah, with human flesh!
- Don't talk rubbish. Hush.
391
00:35:55,329 --> 00:36:00,269
Enough of this piranha nonsense.
- Come over here, please.
392
00:36:02,209 --> 00:36:04,489
- He's one of them!
- Oh, stop it.
393
00:36:04,489 --> 00:36:08,684
He's the only survivor from
a Chinese convent. He was the gardener.
394
00:36:08,684 --> 00:36:12,404
When the convent was destroyed,
he survived for 6 months eating swans.
395
00:36:12,404 --> 00:36:16,124
Would you get in the pool, dear?
- No! - Go on.
396
00:36:16,124 --> 00:36:19,899
- Why won't he get in the pool?
- Quiet. Behave!
397
00:36:21,119 --> 00:36:24,869
Don't worry, I put the fish in the bath.
Go on!
398
00:36:25,279 --> 00:36:27,389
- You see?
- Poor man.
399
00:36:28,399 --> 00:36:29,709
Go on, get in.
400
00:36:33,194 --> 00:36:35,424
Don't do it! Listen to me.
401
00:36:40,034 --> 00:36:41,824
They'll eat him!
402
00:36:43,469 --> 00:36:44,939
Be careful!
403
00:36:47,509 --> 00:36:50,749
- They're not eating him.
- They've become vegetarian.
404
00:36:50,749 --> 00:36:53,429
I don't get it.
- Don't be ridiculous.
405
00:36:53,429 --> 00:36:58,064
Pity the Nuremberg trials are over,
I'd have you hanged.
406
00:36:58,064 --> 00:37:00,654
- Such a pity.
- Silly boys!
407
00:37:00,984 --> 00:37:06,134
Perhaps you'd like to watch
a gymnastics display by my girls.
408
00:37:08,099 --> 00:37:10,129
They're very good!
409
00:37:13,739 --> 00:37:15,369
Pass me the ball.
410
00:37:23,614 --> 00:37:24,964
Excuse me.
411
00:37:25,614 --> 00:37:26,494
What is it?
412
00:37:26,494 --> 00:37:29,054
- Everything alright, sir?
- Get everyone ready to leave.
413
00:37:29,054 --> 00:37:31,569
- False alarm.
- Yes, sir.
414
00:37:31,569 --> 00:37:34,809
- Something's not right.
- Definitely suspect.
415
00:37:34,809 --> 00:37:39,749
- Follow me, don't act suspicious.
- They mustn't suspect.
416
00:37:49,644 --> 00:37:50,994
Very good.
417
00:38:05,919 --> 00:38:08,434
I'm not fooled by this college scam.
418
00:38:08,434 --> 00:38:13,104
If we don't find something,
the boss is going to fire us.
419
00:38:15,474 --> 00:38:16,944
What was that?
420
00:38:19,069 --> 00:38:20,209
No noise!
421
00:38:29,669 --> 00:38:32,934
Stop dancing!
This isn't a wedding.
422
00:39:21,524 --> 00:39:24,034
- What's up?
- Come here.
423
00:39:25,484 --> 00:39:26,484
What is it?
424
00:39:26,484 --> 00:39:28,964
- An opening - On the left?
- No, in mid-field!
425
00:39:28,964 --> 00:39:31,749
- Shall we look?
- Let's look.
426
00:39:34,759 --> 00:39:35,979
A red light!
427
00:39:36,599 --> 00:39:38,389
Let's take a look.
428
00:39:40,279 --> 00:39:42,319
- Watch it!
- You watch it!
429
00:39:42,319 --> 00:39:45,984
- Who's that?
- Someone in a hurry for a bath.
430
00:39:51,274 --> 00:39:53,064
A dead China-man!
431
00:39:53,634 --> 00:39:55,979
This place is a cemetery!
432
00:39:57,629 --> 00:40:00,269
Oh, general, you're too kind.
433
00:40:00,269 --> 00:40:03,019
- Colonel!
- Who's that?
434
00:40:04,029 --> 00:40:08,664
- We've got proof! It's proved. Proven!
- Enough of this.
435
00:40:08,664 --> 00:40:12,024
I'm not interested. Let's go.
- The fish! Don't go!
436
00:40:12,024 --> 00:40:14,774
They're closing the gates.
437
00:40:18,544 --> 00:40:23,089
They've closed them.
They're coming towards us. Run!
438
00:40:40,374 --> 00:40:43,039
Take them to the strongroom.
439
00:40:46,129 --> 00:40:48,329
No-one's following us.
440
00:40:48,329 --> 00:40:52,199
At least we got out
of that horrible dark cell.
441
00:40:52,929 --> 00:40:54,329
Stop pushing.
442
00:40:54,329 --> 00:40:56,314
We gave them the slip.
443
00:40:56,804 --> 00:40:59,604
- Stop turning around
- Follow me, stay close.
444
00:40:59,604 --> 00:41:00,994
Where are we?
445
00:41:02,004 --> 00:41:04,514
We're moving like a mad crab.
446
00:41:05,204 --> 00:41:09,149
Big scales, little scales,
capsules, jars
447
00:41:09,479 --> 00:41:12,119
It's all mechanical. What is this?
448
00:41:12,119 --> 00:41:16,389
I want to know what they're making
in this college.
449
00:41:17,879 --> 00:41:20,254
- Let's see. Ciccio!
- What is it?
450
00:41:24,634 --> 00:41:26,914
Look at all the lovely women!
451
00:41:26,914 --> 00:41:29,954
- What women, are you mad?
- They're beautiful, I can see them!
452
00:41:29,954 --> 00:41:32,629
- Come on. Follow me.
- Where to?
453
00:41:32,629 --> 00:41:35,709
- We have to get this rope off.
- Forget that, I want the girls!
454
00:41:35,709 --> 00:41:37,979
We'll use this handle.
455
00:41:38,109 --> 00:41:40,979
Rub against it.
Stop it! - Wait!
456
00:41:49,024 --> 00:41:50,164
Look!
457
00:41:53,464 --> 00:41:57,729
Look, she's got green eyes.
She's coming this way!
458
00:41:57,859 --> 00:42:01,499
- Command me, master
- A ham sandwich. - What?
459
00:42:01,499 --> 00:42:03,289
Untie this rope.
460
00:42:03,899 --> 00:42:07,164
Ciccio, there's more. Still more!
461
00:42:08,614 --> 00:42:12,374
Where are they coming from?
They're so beautiful.
462
00:42:12,374 --> 00:42:15,774
It's like being in a doll factory.
- A supermarket.
463
00:42:15,774 --> 00:42:19,999
- Gather round girls. We're right here.
- Easy now.
464
00:42:20,489 --> 00:42:23,089
We're two red-blooded Sicilians.
465
00:42:23,089 --> 00:42:25,689
Finally, we're free.
- Right let's get out of here.
466
00:42:25,689 --> 00:42:27,439
What? Are you mad?
467
00:42:28,009 --> 00:42:31,284
I'm staying here
to enjoy these natural splendors!
468
00:42:31,284 --> 00:42:35,124
I'm going to marry the lot.
Do you all know how to cook?
469
00:42:35,124 --> 00:42:37,794
Yes! We can cook, knit and dance.
470
00:42:40,164 --> 00:42:43,079
- They even dance!
- We can't, we're on duty.
471
00:42:43,079 --> 00:42:45,949
Duty? I'm on leave. Let's dance!
472
00:43:04,514 --> 00:43:07,259
Would you look at all these women!
473
00:43:08,429 --> 00:43:11,619
We're the luckiest men alive. Look!
474
00:43:24,424 --> 00:43:26,654
It's incredible!
475
00:43:32,179 --> 00:43:33,969
Just look at them!
476
00:45:19,534 --> 00:45:21,174
What's going on here?
477
00:45:21,174 --> 00:45:24,494
What is this?
- It's Goldfoot - I don't care!
478
00:45:24,494 --> 00:45:27,774
- Control yourselves! Stop this!
- Let's blend in.
479
00:45:27,774 --> 00:45:30,284
The party pooper's here.
480
00:45:43,008 --> 00:45:45,674
Even machines have bad days.
481
00:46:57,334 --> 00:47:00,874
It's a trick! Spies in the lab!
Emergency!
482
00:47:09,449 --> 00:47:12,849
They've kidnapped Rosanna.
There was a duplicate at her house.
483
00:47:12,849 --> 00:47:14,969
Goldfoot was trying to blow me up.
484
00:47:14,969 --> 00:47:17,409
Did you see her in there?
- I don't know a Rosanna.
485
00:47:17,409 --> 00:47:19,964
- And Ciccio?
I don't know anyone called Ciccio.
486
00:47:19,964 --> 00:47:23,884
I'm not going back in there!
Go and call the police.
487
00:47:23,884 --> 00:47:26,604
- What are you talking about?
- I'm scared.
488
00:47:26,604 --> 00:47:31,509
There's only two of us! Why risk it?
I don't know anything.
489
00:47:34,439 --> 00:47:39,189
Dear general Willis,
you're the last one alive, for now.
490
00:47:40,039 --> 00:47:42,069
Do you want to know why?
491
00:47:42,359 --> 00:47:45,954
- B-b-b-bec..
- Because I need to study you in detail.
492
00:47:45,954 --> 00:47:49,474
Every gesture and mannerism
if I'm to make good use...
493
00:47:49,474 --> 00:47:53,034
of our physical similarity,
so I can take your place.
494
00:47:53,034 --> 00:47:55,539
W-W-what do you intend to do?
495
00:47:56,869 --> 00:48:01,989
V-v-v... very simple. I'm taking your
place as Air Force commander.
496
00:48:01,989 --> 00:48:05,529
Y-y-you can't! R-r-release me at once!
497
00:48:09,384 --> 00:48:14,134
You'll regret this! I'll h-h-have you
shot like a d-dog!
498
00:48:16,944 --> 00:48:20,059
- Your command?
- I only clicked my fingers.
499
00:48:20,059 --> 00:48:23,489
Your fingers speak.
How may I serve you?
500
00:48:24,659 --> 00:48:29,099
Your target is in here. Caged.
Take care of him at once.
501
00:48:29,099 --> 00:48:31,214
That's right. Good girl.
502
00:48:31,214 --> 00:48:36,684
Only use half your explosive charge
while were in here. Go ahead.
503
00:48:45,649 --> 00:48:48,599
- Oh Willis!
- But I'm a married man.
504
00:49:11,119 --> 00:49:13,319
Command me, master.
505
00:49:13,319 --> 00:49:16,939
Listen carefully.
I order you to stay here.
506
00:49:17,839 --> 00:49:21,224
Kill any living creature that enters.
507
00:49:22,754 --> 00:49:26,394
- Kill any living creature.
- I leave you to your fate.
508
00:49:26,394 --> 00:49:27,534
Let's go.
509
00:49:46,544 --> 00:49:49,254
Kill all living creatures.
510
00:49:53,264 --> 00:49:54,454
A beetle!
511
00:50:04,619 --> 00:50:06,939
- I'm going.
- Come here.
512
00:50:06,939 --> 00:50:08,374
I'm scared!
513
00:50:08,374 --> 00:50:10,674
- Quiet!
- I'm scared
514
00:50:16,574 --> 00:50:19,729
The trap door is in the bathroom, right?
515
00:50:19,729 --> 00:50:23,409
I'm going in. Watch my back.
- You're leaving me alone?
516
00:50:23,409 --> 00:50:25,519
I'll raise the alarm!
517
00:50:38,324 --> 00:50:40,114
Woodworm!
518
00:50:52,119 --> 00:50:55,894
- Ciccio! You escaped. Me too!
- Tapeworm.
519
00:50:59,394 --> 00:51:03,594
What are you doing? Are you crazy?
It's me, your little Franky!
520
00:51:03,594 --> 00:51:04,734
Hug me!
521
00:51:10,589 --> 00:51:13,099
You're breaking my ribs!
522
00:51:15,789 --> 00:51:21,014
Killer! Traitor! How can you do this?
I've known you for years.
523
00:51:22,344 --> 00:51:24,694
We're brothers in arms.
524
00:51:25,504 --> 00:51:27,774
Don't come any closer!
525
00:51:28,104 --> 00:51:30,464
Kill all living creatures.
526
00:51:30,464 --> 00:51:32,409
No! Put the bar down!
527
00:51:34,779 --> 00:51:37,209
What are you doing in there?
528
00:51:49,934 --> 00:51:54,244
- Rosanna! - I'm Ciccio.
- I know, where's Rosanna?
529
00:52:03,489 --> 00:52:06,009
What did they do? Are you frozen?
530
00:52:06,009 --> 00:52:07,914
I'll defrost you.
531
00:52:10,844 --> 00:52:12,914
Predatory male.
532
00:52:14,444 --> 00:52:15,554
Look out!
533
00:52:56,784 --> 00:52:58,304
Poor Ciccio.
534
00:52:58,304 --> 00:53:00,904
Something must have driven him mad.
535
00:53:00,904 --> 00:53:04,054
Don't worry, this is just a duplicate.
536
00:53:04,904 --> 00:53:08,059
- Where's Goldfoot?
- I heard him use the secret passage.
537
00:53:08,059 --> 00:53:12,369
I think it's over there,
near where I was locked up.
538
00:53:21,894 --> 00:53:23,764
That's it! Come on.
539
00:53:44,964 --> 00:53:47,634
You wanted to kill me! We'll see!
540
00:53:49,124 --> 00:53:52,994
- What's happening?
- I'll kill you like a dog.
541
00:53:59,079 --> 00:54:01,509
What are you doing? Stop it!
542
00:54:02,639 --> 00:54:04,399
Are you crazy?
- Want some more?
543
00:54:04,399 --> 00:54:07,474
Listen! Goldfoot's escaped by car.
We have to follow him.
544
00:54:07,474 --> 00:54:11,144
There's no time to lose.
Hurry up, let's go!
545
00:54:11,394 --> 00:54:15,064
- Back-stabber. I'll show you!
- Move it!
546
00:54:24,869 --> 00:54:27,379
Here they come. Quickly!
547
00:54:50,299 --> 00:54:52,649
Where can they have gone?
548
00:54:57,054 --> 00:54:59,044
How did they get away?
549
00:54:59,414 --> 00:55:02,884
- I almost had them.
- Have you got a light?
550
00:55:09,209 --> 00:55:13,319
- They must be close by.
- They could be anywhere.
551
00:55:17,409 --> 00:55:18,999
What do we do now?
552
00:55:26,284 --> 00:55:29,154
- Ciccio! It's them!
- Get them
553
00:55:36,599 --> 00:55:40,949
Mr Tall Man! Have you seen
anyone go by from up there?
554
00:55:43,354 --> 00:55:47,354
Sorry. No speak Italian.
From giant pigmy tribe.
555
00:55:47,354 --> 00:55:50,424
Sorry to have bothered you. Let's go.
556
00:55:56,869 --> 00:55:58,419
Quickly.
557
00:56:01,509 --> 00:56:02,649
This way.
558
00:56:05,989 --> 00:56:08,174
They didn't notice.
559
00:56:13,624 --> 00:56:16,384
Hey you! Indecent behaviour
560
00:56:16,384 --> 00:56:18,944
I'd love to see their faces now.
561
00:56:19,779 --> 00:56:22,729
- You really want to?
- Of course.
562
00:56:28,459 --> 00:56:30,499
- Get off! Who's there?
- Let me out.
563
00:56:30,499 --> 00:56:34,494
- Please, wait! You can't park here.
- What are you two doing?
564
00:56:34,494 --> 00:56:37,284
Where are you going? Come back!
565
00:56:43,929 --> 00:56:45,719
Quickly, get in.
566
00:56:46,569 --> 00:56:50,269
- That's a no-parking zone!
- I'll show you.
567
00:56:52,929 --> 00:56:55,514
You scoundrel, come here.
568
00:56:58,604 --> 00:57:01,034
Let him go.
- Stupid fool.
569
00:57:05,724 --> 00:57:07,989
Left hook, right hook.
570
00:57:08,319 --> 00:57:11,549
- He got away again.
- He left his cloak.
571
00:57:14,319 --> 00:57:18,019
Here come our guys.
- Quickly - Pass her to me.
572
00:57:20,834 --> 00:57:23,664
- There they go.
- After them!
573
00:57:27,154 --> 00:57:29,184
Come on, let's ride!
574
00:57:30,354 --> 00:57:31,899
Give me a steed.
575
00:57:35,389 --> 00:57:38,149
Take cover, they'll get you.
- I've got cover.
576
00:57:38,149 --> 00:57:40,259
Get off.
- What next?
577
00:57:40,469 --> 00:57:43,259
We'll get when they come round.
578
00:57:43,345 --> 00:57:44,694
You again!
579
00:57:51,424 --> 00:57:53,534
You can't park there!
580
00:57:54,184 --> 00:57:58,329
We'll follow them with the express.
Get on board!
581
00:58:09,774 --> 00:58:10,914
Stop!
582
00:58:12,534 --> 00:58:14,294
They've gone.
583
00:58:14,294 --> 00:58:17,294
- We've arrived.
- Oh, thanks.
584
00:58:17,294 --> 00:58:18,964
There they are!
585
00:58:19,609 --> 00:58:20,749
Run!
586
00:58:28,369 --> 00:58:29,839
No parking!
587
00:59:10,109 --> 00:59:11,619
Move your car!
588
00:59:12,869 --> 00:59:14,659
They took the car!
589
00:59:24,144 --> 00:59:26,944
Let's get in there,
we'll see where they're going.
590
00:59:26,944 --> 00:59:29,934
I've got you this time. Come on then!
591
00:59:34,259 --> 00:59:36,489
Run away! You cowards.
592
00:59:38,739 --> 00:59:42,009
Roll up folks! Take trip in the balloon.
593
00:59:45,774 --> 00:59:48,924
Just a moment, pay up.
- Quick, get in.
594
00:59:53,694 --> 00:59:55,204
Move your car!
595
00:59:55,373 --> 00:59:57,169
You're not getting away!
596
00:59:57,169 --> 00:59:59,569
Stop right there. It's full.
597
00:59:59,569 --> 01:00:01,439
What are you doing?
598
01:00:07,129 --> 01:00:10,234
There they are! The car's leaving.
599
01:00:13,324 --> 01:00:16,844
You cheating scoundrels!
- Who's that?
600
01:00:16,844 --> 01:00:20,379
- Murderers! Swine!
- It's still him.
601
01:00:23,839 --> 01:00:26,789
Do you have any scissors?
- Sure.
602
01:00:30,799 --> 01:00:31,934
Here.
603
01:00:38,394 --> 01:00:39,904
Alone at last.
604
01:00:40,314 --> 01:00:42,744
Idiot! What have you done?
605
01:00:42,874 --> 01:00:46,619
- I cut the rope.
- I noticed. Now what do we do?
606
01:00:50,469 --> 01:00:54,229
- We can play cards.
- We have to find Goldfoot.
607
01:00:54,229 --> 01:00:57,104
How are we supposed to steer?
- My cards! How could you?
608
01:00:57,104 --> 01:01:01,254
- How do we control this thing?
- Have you got a fan?
609
01:01:03,824 --> 01:01:05,214
Hands off!
610
01:01:10,739 --> 01:01:15,089
- As if that's going to help.
- Which way? Over there?
611
01:01:17,459 --> 01:01:18,969
And we're off!
612
01:01:19,774 --> 01:01:22,884
Please fasten your safety belts.
613
01:01:28,374 --> 01:01:31,439
"See you again, my Roman friends".
614
01:01:34,569 --> 01:01:35,839
Oh, stop it.
615
01:01:40,009 --> 01:01:43,039
There! He's already taking off.
616
01:01:43,444 --> 01:01:44,834
He's done it.
617
01:02:02,479 --> 01:02:07,149
Quick, let's follow them.
Turn the fan around. Faster!
618
01:02:13,394 --> 01:02:14,784
Faster!
619
01:02:16,634 --> 01:02:20,779
We've run out of juice!
How will we catch them now.
620
01:02:21,189 --> 01:02:24,709
I know a short cut. Turn right,
then left at the crossroads.
621
01:02:24,709 --> 01:02:26,619
He knows a short cut.
622
01:02:27,109 --> 01:02:30,189
- Are you sure?
- We might hit a typhoon.
623
01:02:30,189 --> 01:02:34,904
- I don't care, I've had my jabs.
- Idiot! It's not a disease.
624
01:02:34,904 --> 01:02:37,974
- So what is it?
- It's an Asian curry.
625
01:02:40,544 --> 01:02:43,779
- Bad weather's all we need.
- The barometer was wrong.
626
01:02:43,779 --> 01:02:45,529
We forgot to tap it!
627
01:02:48,459 --> 01:02:49,599
Look.
628
01:02:49,699 --> 01:02:52,449
A pigeon. What's he doing here?
629
01:02:53,179 --> 01:02:55,814
Shoo! Get lost, you stow away.
630
01:02:55,814 --> 01:02:59,054
- Leave him be, he's a carrier pigeon.
- How can you tell?
631
01:02:59,054 --> 01:03:02,574
- Look, he's carrying a bag.
- Where? Oh yes.
632
01:03:02,574 --> 01:03:04,804
Can we get you anything?
633
01:03:06,974 --> 01:03:08,999
Poor little thing.
634
01:03:11,689 --> 01:03:14,559
The death of an innocent pigeon!
635
01:03:17,609 --> 01:03:21,164
We're losing height.
We have to drop ballast.
636
01:03:21,164 --> 01:03:22,274
Quick.
637
01:03:22,484 --> 01:03:24,164
No time to waste.
638
01:03:24,164 --> 01:03:27,164
- Throw out anything we don't need.
- No, just the useless stuff.
639
01:03:27,164 --> 01:03:29,394
So what are you? Useful?
640
01:03:30,084 --> 01:03:31,829
We're flying!
641
01:03:36,319 --> 01:03:41,709
Look, the Chinese Wall!
- The Iron Curtain. Those are the Urals.
642
01:03:44,314 --> 01:03:45,664
You again!
643
01:03:48,554 --> 01:03:52,624
- Look who it is!
- You bastards. This isn't over!
644
01:03:55,989 --> 01:03:59,099
In a balloon! Against the traffic!
645
01:04:02,069 --> 01:04:05,739
Stay here! Forever!
It's what you deserve.
646
01:04:08,264 --> 01:04:12,934
I'll be waiting for you.
You'll be seeing me again soon.
647
01:04:15,304 --> 01:04:18,904
After this cloud, there's a bend.
We'll wait for Goldfoot there.
648
01:04:18,904 --> 01:04:22,679
- How do you know all this?
- Oh, it's nothing!
649
01:04:27,379 --> 01:04:28,519
Stop!
650
01:04:32,134 --> 01:04:34,594
Look! There's the plane.
651
01:04:41,614 --> 01:04:45,119
- Duck.
- Right, let's open the valves.
652
01:04:58,164 --> 01:04:59,304
Who is it?
653
01:04:59,644 --> 01:05:03,234
- Friends.
- Friends, that's nice!
654
01:05:03,644 --> 01:05:05,154
Just a moment.
655
01:05:13,119 --> 01:05:14,229
Quick!
656
01:05:15,159 --> 01:05:16,669
Quickly!
657
01:05:34,509 --> 01:05:36,259
Get off me will you?
658
01:05:54,504 --> 01:05:56,799
I'm a contortionist.
659
01:05:59,979 --> 01:06:02,209
Let go of my foot!
- Help.
660
01:06:15,774 --> 01:06:17,604
Somebody help me!
661
01:06:18,014 --> 01:06:19,799
That should do it.
662
01:06:32,244 --> 01:06:33,384
Here I am.
663
01:07:02,234 --> 01:07:05,024
It's not working.
- Allow me.
664
01:07:09,549 --> 01:07:13,699
My eyes! I can't see!
- Don't worry, I'll help you.
665
01:07:14,989 --> 01:07:18,499
This way please. Bye!
- Where's the step!
666
01:07:20,904 --> 01:07:23,224
Guess how the Chinese man died?
667
01:07:23,224 --> 01:07:27,774
Don't spoil the ending for me.
Where's the fun in that?
668
01:07:54,214 --> 01:07:57,369
Farewell, my friends, farewell.
I have to leave.
669
01:07:57,369 --> 01:08:01,719
I've taken care of everything.
The autopilot's on.
670
01:08:01,929 --> 01:08:05,769
In precisely 16 minutes, the H bomb
on board will hit the Kremlin.
671
01:08:05,769 --> 01:08:10,234
My plan will have its happy ending,
as I knew it would.
672
01:08:11,084 --> 01:08:13,604
No-one beats Goldfoot!
673
01:08:13,604 --> 01:08:16,064
Hardjob, where are you?
674
01:08:16,884 --> 01:08:19,154
- Here I am!
- Dearest.
675
01:08:19,959 --> 01:08:24,069
You're not Mary Poppins,
but you'll do. Come on.
676
01:08:25,959 --> 01:08:27,099
Let go of me.
677
01:08:37,714 --> 01:08:38,854
Blast!
678
01:08:45,349 --> 01:08:46,489
A ghost!
679
01:08:53,069 --> 01:08:56,734
We're safe, they've gone.
- The hell we are.
680
01:08:57,184 --> 01:09:02,104
The controls are locked, in a few
seconds, the bomb will hit Moscow.
681
01:09:02,104 --> 01:09:04,134
So? We're insured.
682
01:09:05,224 --> 01:09:07,424
Benson calling Willis, do you read me?
683
01:09:07,424 --> 01:09:09,819
I'm told you're flying over Russia,
have you gone mad?
684
01:09:09,819 --> 01:09:11,609
Respond at once.
685
01:09:12,219 --> 01:09:14,259
- Benson, it's me.
- Who's me?
686
01:09:14,259 --> 01:09:16,499
- It's Bill Dexter.
- You again!
687
01:09:16,499 --> 01:09:20,374
Your agents are with me.
They've done a great job.
688
01:09:20,374 --> 01:09:22,334
Do you want to speak to them?
689
01:09:22,334 --> 01:09:24,734
If I hear from them,
I'll have another heart attack.
690
01:09:24,734 --> 01:09:29,574
Where is general Willis?
- Goldfoot killed him to take his place.
691
01:09:29,574 --> 01:09:33,649
- We've dealt with him.
- Good, but you must turn around.
692
01:09:33,649 --> 01:09:36,489
We can't, the controls are locked.
693
01:09:36,489 --> 01:09:39,729
In eight minutes, the H bomb
will hit the Kremlin.
694
01:09:39,729 --> 01:09:43,209
- This is terrible.
- You're telling me!
695
01:09:43,209 --> 01:09:47,364
Right, I'm sending fighter planes
to shoot you down.
696
01:09:47,364 --> 01:09:50,034
Are you mad? What about the bomb?
697
01:09:50,244 --> 01:09:53,434
- True. Use my two agents.
- That's us.
698
01:09:54,524 --> 01:09:56,599
There are instructions near the bomb.
699
01:09:56,599 --> 01:10:00,439
Make sure you put on
protective suits before you begin.
700
01:10:00,439 --> 01:10:03,109
Okay guys, it's all up to you now.
701
01:10:20,509 --> 01:10:23,459
There's the bomb, get down there.
702
01:10:28,469 --> 01:10:33,734
- Why are we wearing these suits?
- To protect you from fallout.
703
01:10:35,184 --> 01:10:38,744
- Are we going to fall? I'm scared!
- Haven't you heard of Uranium?
704
01:10:38,744 --> 01:10:43,494
Of course. It's what the English use
in salad dressings.
705
01:10:44,699 --> 01:10:50,769
- No, it's a powder used in fireworks.
- Get on with it. Pass me the manual.
706
01:10:51,219 --> 01:10:53,569
Okay, okay! Here you are.
707
01:10:56,174 --> 01:10:59,894
If your bomb explodes accidentally
within it's first year,
708
01:10:59,894 --> 01:11:04,174
Hydrogen Ltd will be happy
to provide you with a replacement.
709
01:11:04,174 --> 01:11:05,964
Here, you read it.
710
01:11:09,529 --> 01:11:14,679
- Have you completed the registration?
- Is this bomb rented?
711
01:11:18,409 --> 01:11:20,914
Open panel HK carefully.
712
01:11:42,359 --> 01:11:43,664
Can we go now?
713
01:11:44,434 --> 01:11:47,974
Slowly turn rheostat B
from seven to zero.
714
01:11:49,994 --> 01:11:53,744
- Which one is it? - Don't touch!
- Okay, okay!
715
01:11:56,309 --> 01:12:00,229
- I wish you'd gone to university.
- I never had the time.
716
01:12:00,229 --> 01:12:02,589
Be careful. We can't afford mistakes,
717
01:12:02,589 --> 01:12:06,939
the bomb will drop in two minutes.
- Relax! We get it.
718
01:12:08,384 --> 01:12:12,654
- Are you sure that's right?
- Stop distracting me.
719
01:12:13,944 --> 01:12:17,424
Carefully extract the silver contact...
720
01:12:17,424 --> 01:12:20,489
next to rheostat B. Do not allow it...
721
01:12:21,659 --> 01:12:24,219
to touch the red or green wires.
722
01:12:25,219 --> 01:12:28,489
Don't let the thingy touch the colours.
723
01:12:32,694 --> 01:12:38,764
Be extra careful. It's at this point
the bomb is almost certain to go off.
724
01:12:46,609 --> 01:12:50,309
There! The bomb's disarmed!
We're safe!
725
01:12:50,649 --> 01:12:52,439
Wait! Wait for us!
726
01:12:55,764 --> 01:12:56,904
Mummy!
727
01:12:59,964 --> 01:13:01,394
Hold tight!
728
01:13:06,444 --> 01:13:09,589
- What are you doing?
- Don't leave me!
729
01:13:12,479 --> 01:13:15,149
I couldn't live without you!
730
01:13:19,039 --> 01:13:22,544
- We're upside down.
- Don't move an inch!
731
01:13:25,034 --> 01:13:29,104
I'm not enjoying this at all.
I have to get a grip.
732
01:13:29,194 --> 01:13:31,064
Hold my hand tight!
733
01:13:35,469 --> 01:13:37,379
We're going down!
734
01:13:41,669 --> 01:13:44,664
Hallo, Benson? The bomb dropped,
but it didn't go off.
735
01:13:44,664 --> 01:13:48,854
- Well done, Bill.
- Your agents gave their lives.
736
01:13:49,264 --> 01:13:53,414
They sacrificed themselves
for all mankind.
737
01:13:53,544 --> 01:13:56,059
How do we get back?
The controls don't work.
738
01:13:56,059 --> 01:13:58,459
Didn't you know the world is round?
739
01:13:58,459 --> 01:14:03,459
Keep going, you'll get back
to your point of origin. Relax!
740
01:14:03,459 --> 01:14:05,529
Thanks, Benson!
741
01:14:08,294 --> 01:14:10,724
- Bless you.
- Thanks.
742
01:14:12,094 --> 01:14:14,964
- Where are we?
- How should I know?
743
01:14:19,174 --> 01:14:23,319
It's freezing here.
- Forty degrees in the shade.
744
01:14:26,409 --> 01:14:28,279
I can hear Russian.
745
01:14:28,889 --> 01:14:32,324
- How can you tell?
- I had a friend from France.
746
01:14:32,324 --> 01:14:34,594
- Look!
- Who are they?
747
01:14:37,244 --> 01:14:38,364
Comrades!
748
01:14:38,364 --> 01:14:39,714
Bless you.
749
01:14:40,204 --> 01:14:43,739
Greet them, like this.
Comrades, it's us!
750
01:14:44,319 --> 01:14:46,699
We saved the whole world!
751
01:14:47,399 --> 01:14:50,429
The Kremlin too.
- There's two?
752
01:14:50,639 --> 01:14:53,149
- From the H bomb!
- Oh, that.
753
01:14:57,274 --> 01:14:58,414
Let go!
754
01:14:59,074 --> 01:15:02,274
- You don't know who I am.
- This is Ciccio. - Thanks.
755
01:15:02,274 --> 01:15:05,144
I have relatives in high places.
756
01:15:05,634 --> 01:15:09,499
In 1947, my cousin
was a member of parliament.
757
01:15:16,789 --> 01:15:21,134
I've always said Bill Dexter
was a gifted young man.
758
01:15:21,864 --> 01:15:24,944
We'll have to make him
a secret agent with honors.
759
01:15:24,944 --> 01:15:26,334
Cheers!
760
01:15:28,104 --> 01:15:30,054
The President.
761
01:15:37,179 --> 01:15:40,619
Everything's in order, Mr President.
It all went well.
762
01:15:40,619 --> 01:15:44,014
The H bomb didn't explode.
In fact, it's buried in the snow.
763
01:15:44,014 --> 01:15:47,214
There will be no more
mention of this incident.
764
01:15:47,214 --> 01:15:51,054
If the Russians learn that any old
criminal can hi-jack a plane,
765
01:15:51,054 --> 01:15:53,774
and drop bombs on the Kremlin at will...
766
01:15:53,774 --> 01:15:56,369
the diplomatic implications
would be endless. Is that clear?
767
01:15:56,369 --> 01:15:58,409
Of course. I understand, but...
768
01:15:58,409 --> 01:16:02,129
I've nominated our agents
for the highest awards.
769
01:16:02,129 --> 01:16:04,289
You see...
- Cancel all that.
770
01:16:04,289 --> 01:16:06,609
Do you think this is
the time for publicity?
771
01:16:06,609 --> 01:16:12,314
- No of course not Mr President.
- So this operation never happened!
772
01:16:15,724 --> 01:16:18,954
We're innocent! We saved your lives.
773
01:16:20,559 --> 01:16:26,109
It's true! We've nothing against you.
I swear on my friend's life!
774
01:16:29,439 --> 01:16:32,784
Please forgive. I believe you say truth.
775
01:16:33,914 --> 01:16:36,704
Please, take seat. Have food.
776
01:16:43,554 --> 01:16:45,459
Please, sit. Eat!
777
01:16:46,749 --> 01:16:48,819
Salmon, caviar,
778
01:16:49,469 --> 01:16:52,029
bread, carrots, vodka.
779
01:16:53,149 --> 01:16:55,824
Green salad.
- What, no Russian salad?
780
01:16:55,824 --> 01:16:57,254
Never mind.
781
01:17:02,544 --> 01:17:03,894
Excuse me.
782
01:17:12,339 --> 01:17:13,969
The Germans!
783
01:17:23,974 --> 01:17:25,364
Cheers!
784
01:17:42,209 --> 01:17:43,804
This is colonel Benson.
785
01:17:43,804 --> 01:17:47,484
My dear captain, the two men
I mentioned are both impostors.
786
01:17:47,484 --> 01:17:51,434
- Is that so? Right.
- Arrest them immediately.
787
01:17:53,004 --> 01:17:57,229
They're a threat
to international relations.
788
01:17:57,919 --> 01:18:02,799
It's our boss. I recognise his voice.
He's inside the phone.
789
01:18:02,799 --> 01:18:06,829
Perhaps they're arranging a celebration.
790
01:18:09,234 --> 01:18:11,194
- In Moscow.
- No, it'll be Washington.
791
01:18:11,194 --> 01:18:12,914
- Moscow.
- Washington.
792
01:18:12,914 --> 01:18:17,994
Excuse me, will our award ceremony
be in Washington or Moscow?
793
01:18:17,994 --> 01:18:19,354
Siberia!
794
01:18:19,354 --> 01:18:21,139
I'm dying of cold!
795
01:18:21,309 --> 01:18:24,259
Mr Russia. Can we have July, please?
796
01:18:25,189 --> 01:18:27,219
"I hate the summer".
797
01:18:30,429 --> 01:18:32,184
What are you up to?
- I'm cold.
798
01:18:32,184 --> 01:18:34,584
- It's not a radiator.
- Just a little heat.
799
01:18:34,584 --> 01:18:37,784
- I need it for the spaghetti.
- You only ever think about food.
800
01:18:37,784 --> 01:18:41,404
What if I die of cold?
- Get out of my kitchen.
801
01:18:44,459 --> 01:18:47,259
- What are you doing?
- It's stuffy, I need fresh air.
802
01:18:47,259 --> 01:18:48,399
What air?
803
01:18:49,579 --> 01:18:51,219
Close it, there's a draft!
804
01:18:51,219 --> 01:18:55,699
Lunatic! Are you trying to kill me?
- Don't exaggerate! Go on.
805
01:18:55,699 --> 01:18:57,364
Just a bit of heat.
806
01:18:58,134 --> 01:19:01,644
- What's the current here?
- 125 watts.
807
01:19:07,414 --> 01:19:09,759
Hey, we've got a visitor.
808
01:19:10,329 --> 01:19:11,809
Good day, gentlemen.
809
01:19:11,809 --> 01:19:15,449
- What are you cooking?
- Spaghetti, Italian style.
810
01:19:15,449 --> 01:19:19,844
We invented spaghetti,
but here it's pronounced 'spaghyetti'.
811
01:19:19,844 --> 01:19:22,564
If you let me taste them,
I could use my influence...
812
01:19:22,564 --> 01:19:27,004
to get you into the Russian
secret service, the OGPU.
813
01:19:27,004 --> 01:19:28,994
Sure! Go ahead
814
01:19:32,639 --> 01:19:34,429
Please, come in.
815
01:19:35,239 --> 01:19:36,589
Excuse me.
816
01:19:41,159 --> 01:19:43,904
Pardon me, have we met already?
817
01:19:44,834 --> 01:19:48,874
No, I've never been here before.
You're sure they'll be good?
818
01:19:48,874 --> 01:19:52,224
Good? They'll be perfect! Observe.
819
01:19:53,074 --> 01:19:56,219
Close the lid! Close it, I'm freezing!
820
01:19:56,749 --> 01:20:00,179
Close it! The film is finished!
Close it!
821
01:20:01,749 --> 01:20:04,179
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