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1
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ADULT SHELDON:
I'd like to tell you a story
2
00:00:02,346 --> 00:00:04,375
about a time I was right.
3
00:00:04,378 --> 00:00:05,737
Now, I'm sure you're thinking,
4
00:00:05,739 --> 00:00:08,406
"But, Sheldon, you're never wrong."
5
00:00:08,408 --> 00:00:11,626
And you'd be right.
6
00:00:11,628 --> 00:00:13,461
But it's worth taking a closer look
7
00:00:13,463 --> 00:00:16,070
at this particular incident.
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Because it began with a loaf of bread,
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and ended with me and my family
10
00:00:21,138 --> 00:00:25,006
almost being kicked out of
the United States of America.
11
00:00:29,428 --> 00:00:30,511
Uh-oh.
12
00:00:30,514 --> 00:00:32,187
What's the matter?
13
00:00:32,190 --> 00:00:34,482
Something's wrong with my sandwich.
14
00:00:34,484 --> 00:00:35,984
Did it go bad?
15
00:00:35,986 --> 00:00:39,687
No. It just tastes... different.
16
00:00:39,689 --> 00:00:42,273
If you don't want it, I'll
trade you for my dumplings.
17
00:00:42,275 --> 00:00:43,445
I'm already unhappy.
18
00:00:43,448 --> 00:00:45,943
Do you really think dumplings
will fix the problem?
19
00:00:45,946 --> 00:00:48,830
It'll fix my problem.
I'm sick of dumplings.
20
00:00:50,167 --> 00:00:51,449
[PHONE RINGS]
21
00:00:51,451 --> 00:00:53,701
Mary Cooper, how may I bless you?
22
00:00:53,703 --> 00:00:54,895
SHELDON: Hello, Mom?
23
00:00:54,898 --> 00:00:56,621
Sheldon? Everything okay?
24
00:00:56,623 --> 00:00:58,173
- No.
- What's wrong?
25
00:00:58,175 --> 00:01:00,875
- What happened?
- My sandwich tastes different.
26
00:01:00,877 --> 00:01:03,044
[SIGHS] You know you're
not supposed to call
27
00:01:03,046 --> 00:01:04,429
unless it's an emergency.
28
00:01:04,431 --> 00:01:07,265
I'm well aware. So what did you change?
29
00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:08,883
I didn't change anything.
30
00:01:08,885 --> 00:01:11,886
Same bread, same peanut
butter, same jelly.
31
00:01:11,888 --> 00:01:14,973
Did you use one knife
for the PB and the J?
32
00:01:14,975 --> 00:01:17,392
- No.
- Are you sure?
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00:01:17,394 --> 00:01:19,644
That was one time two years ago,
34
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and all the other knives were dirty.
35
00:01:21,281 --> 00:01:23,314
It was 14 months and 11 days ago.
36
00:01:23,316 --> 00:01:25,650
When we made the big
switch from Wonder Bread.
37
00:01:25,652 --> 00:01:26,793
Oh, how could I forget?
38
00:01:26,796 --> 00:01:29,120
Sheldon, I didn't change anything.
39
00:01:29,122 --> 00:01:30,789
Can I get back to work now?
40
00:01:32,042 --> 00:01:33,408
I suppose so.
41
00:01:33,410 --> 00:01:34,909
Thank you. Bye.
42
00:01:34,911 --> 00:01:36,578
Don't I get an "I love you"?
43
00:01:36,580 --> 00:01:38,413
I love you.
44
00:01:38,415 --> 00:01:40,799
One more time, with
a little more energy.
45
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[PHONE HANGS UP, DIAL TONE SOUNDS]
46
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Must've been disconnected.
47
00:01:46,923 --> 00:01:49,924
Well, my mother didn't
do anything differently.
48
00:01:49,926 --> 00:01:51,593
Are you gonna eat it?
49
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Better. I'm going to do science on it.
50
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[SIGHS] I would eat it.
51
00:01:59,019 --> 00:02:00,902
Are the goggles necessary?
52
00:02:00,904 --> 00:02:03,438
No, but they really set the mood.
53
00:02:03,440 --> 00:02:06,574
Okay, subject "A," jelly.
54
00:02:10,113 --> 00:02:14,249
That's definitely strawberry
and definitely Smuckers.
55
00:02:16,036 --> 00:02:17,109
Subject "B."
56
00:02:20,290 --> 00:02:23,091
That's Jif all right.
Creamy and delicious.
57
00:02:23,093 --> 00:02:24,542
It must be the bread.
58
00:02:24,544 --> 00:02:27,664
Hold on. This is a
scientific experiment.
59
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We can't make assumptions.
60
00:02:29,599 --> 00:02:32,800
Subject "C."
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00:02:32,802 --> 00:02:35,053
It's the bread.
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♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪
63
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♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
64
00:02:41,027 --> 00:02:43,444
♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
65
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♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
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- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
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Welcome to the family, Hacksaw.
68
00:03:01,765 --> 00:03:02,881
[SNIFFLES]
69
00:03:06,851 --> 00:03:08,002
Hey.
70
00:03:08,004 --> 00:03:10,838
Oh. Hey, Georgie.
71
00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:11,950
You okay?
72
00:03:11,953 --> 00:03:13,675
Mm-hmm.
73
00:03:13,677 --> 00:03:14,759
You sure?
74
00:03:14,761 --> 00:03:16,728
Not really.
75
00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:20,181
Um... Dustin broke up with me.
76
00:03:20,183 --> 00:03:22,650
What?
77
00:03:22,652 --> 00:03:24,936
He said I was immature. [SNIFFS]
78
00:03:24,938 --> 00:03:26,187
Is he crazy?
79
00:03:26,189 --> 00:03:28,907
Everything about you screams womanhood.
80
00:03:30,102 --> 00:03:31,318
See?
81
00:03:31,321 --> 00:03:34,105
Happy Hearth Home
Bakeries, just like always.
82
00:03:34,108 --> 00:03:35,448
Well, something is rotten
83
00:03:35,451 --> 00:03:37,581
- in the state of Denmark.
- What?
84
00:03:37,584 --> 00:03:40,034
- That's Shakespeare, Mom.
- Great.
85
00:03:40,036 --> 00:03:42,503
Missy, did your sandwich
taste different today?
86
00:03:42,505 --> 00:03:44,589
Couldn't tell you. I
traded it for a Ding Dong.
87
00:03:45,709 --> 00:03:48,789
Your sandwich is exactly
the same, Sheldon.
88
00:03:48,792 --> 00:03:49,961
What's going on?
89
00:03:49,963 --> 00:03:51,234
This bread is different.
90
00:03:51,237 --> 00:03:52,403
Let me see.
91
00:03:53,967 --> 00:03:55,383
You know, he might be right.
92
00:03:56,469 --> 00:03:57,802
Ow.
93
00:03:57,804 --> 00:04:00,054
Shelly, it's probably
just your taste buds
94
00:04:00,056 --> 00:04:01,556
changing as you get older.
95
00:04:01,558 --> 00:04:03,141
But I don't like change.
96
00:04:03,143 --> 00:04:04,609
Then you're gonna hate puberty.
97
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:08,529
Got me with your ring.
98
00:04:10,051 --> 00:04:11,350
She wasn't wrong.
99
00:04:11,353 --> 00:04:13,234
Studies do support
that your sense of taste
100
00:04:13,236 --> 00:04:14,535
changes over time.
101
00:04:14,537 --> 00:04:16,904
So the bread's the same
and you're different?
102
00:04:16,906 --> 00:04:18,373
Apparently so.
103
00:04:21,494 --> 00:04:23,411
Nope, it's the bread.
104
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[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
105
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Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
106
00:04:35,308 --> 00:04:36,424
Hey.
107
00:04:36,426 --> 00:04:38,559
Hi.
108
00:04:38,561 --> 00:04:40,928
I was wondering if you
wanted to grab a bite to eat
109
00:04:40,930 --> 00:04:42,180
at the Waffle House?
110
00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:45,016
Not like a date.
111
00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:47,435
But as someone who recently
had his heart broke,
112
00:04:47,437 --> 00:04:49,103
I think I could help.
113
00:04:49,105 --> 00:04:50,655
Who broke your heart?
114
00:04:51,554 --> 00:04:52,774
I love you.
115
00:04:52,776 --> 00:04:54,609
- [OTHERS GASPING]
- Ooh!
116
00:04:54,611 --> 00:04:55,743
You did.
117
00:04:55,745 --> 00:04:57,829
Oh. Yeah.
118
00:04:57,831 --> 00:05:00,415
I'm just saying,
119
00:05:00,417 --> 00:05:02,250
I know what you're going through.
120
00:05:02,252 --> 00:05:04,869
So if you need a friend with
a pocket full of waffle money...
121
00:05:04,871 --> 00:05:06,788
[CHUCKLES]
122
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[WOMAN SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY OVER P.A.]
123
00:05:09,651 --> 00:05:11,442
TAM: Look at these prices.
124
00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:13,261
No wonder supermarkets
are running my parents
125
00:05:13,263 --> 00:05:14,796
out of business.
126
00:05:14,798 --> 00:05:16,681
Your parents own a convenience store.
127
00:05:16,683 --> 00:05:18,966
They charge extra for the convenience.
128
00:05:18,968 --> 00:05:20,635
How is this not convenient?
129
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Excuse me, sir.
130
00:05:22,201 --> 00:05:23,700
Has anything changed with the bread
131
00:05:23,703 --> 00:05:25,523
from the Happy Hearth Home Bakeries?
132
00:05:25,525 --> 00:05:26,808
I have no idea.
133
00:05:26,810 --> 00:05:28,976
How can you not know? You work here.
134
00:05:28,978 --> 00:05:30,144
What do you want from me?
135
00:05:30,146 --> 00:05:32,814
I get $3.35 an hour to stock shelves.
136
00:05:32,816 --> 00:05:33,865
Are you kidding?
137
00:05:33,867 --> 00:05:35,817
My father pays me five dollars a week.
138
00:05:38,585 --> 00:05:40,621
I bet they're violating
child labor laws.
139
00:05:40,623 --> 00:05:41,921
Look. This loaf says
140
00:05:41,924 --> 00:05:44,734
"A subsidiary of the
Domestic Food Corporation."
141
00:05:44,737 --> 00:05:46,661
This older loaf doesn't.
142
00:05:46,663 --> 00:05:49,080
I wonder if I can take
my parents to court?
143
00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:51,999
[SNIFFS] It smells like my bread.
144
00:05:52,001 --> 00:05:54,635
Or I could start a labor
union with my sisters.
145
00:05:54,637 --> 00:05:56,973
This is it! This is my bread!
146
00:05:56,976 --> 00:05:58,473
We could go on strike.
147
00:05:58,475 --> 00:06:00,531
Bring them to their knees.
148
00:06:00,534 --> 00:06:01,851
SHELDON: Vindication!
149
00:06:07,592 --> 00:06:09,425
[PHONE RINGS]
150
00:06:09,427 --> 00:06:11,010
Happy Hearth Home Bakeries,
151
00:06:11,012 --> 00:06:12,862
this is Pete. How can I help you?
152
00:06:12,864 --> 00:06:14,698
Hello, Pete. My name is Sheldon Cooper,
153
00:06:14,701 --> 00:06:16,334
and I would like to know what changed
154
00:06:16,337 --> 00:06:18,768
in your white sandwich loaf
to make it taste different?
155
00:06:18,770 --> 00:06:21,237
Sheldon, hang up the
phone. It's dinner time.
156
00:06:21,239 --> 00:06:24,297
Be right there, Mom. I'm doing
battle with corporate America.
157
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:25,299
I'm sorry, Pete.
158
00:06:25,302 --> 00:06:26,545
You were saying?
159
00:06:26,548 --> 00:06:28,849
Any chance your bread was
past the expiration date?
160
00:06:28,852 --> 00:06:31,613
No, it was brand-new. But
I did a taste comparison
161
00:06:31,616 --> 00:06:34,367
after it was bought out by
the Domestic Food Corporation,
162
00:06:34,369 --> 00:06:36,869
and they are definitely not the same.
163
00:06:36,871 --> 00:06:40,206
Well, I can assure you
that, "the recent acquisition
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00:06:40,208 --> 00:06:43,259
by the Domestic Food
Corporation has not affected
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00:06:43,261 --> 00:06:45,428
the quality of our products in any way.
166
00:06:45,430 --> 00:06:48,146
Every single bread,
baked good, and pastry
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00:06:48,149 --> 00:06:50,882
is made with love. From
our hearth to your home."
168
00:06:50,885 --> 00:06:53,636
Then why does it taste
different, Pete? Why?
169
00:06:53,638 --> 00:06:55,104
Well, because now we make everything
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00:06:55,106 --> 00:06:57,390
really cheap and fast. Bye.
171
00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:04,447
I thought Dustin was different.
172
00:07:04,449 --> 00:07:06,816
I thought he wanted to live
a Christian life like me.
173
00:07:06,818 --> 00:07:10,536
But... all he wanted
is what every guy wants.
174
00:07:10,538 --> 00:07:12,455
[SCOFFS] Guys.
175
00:07:12,457 --> 00:07:15,037
Oh, please, you're all the same.
176
00:07:15,040 --> 00:07:17,971
Hey. You rejected me, you
punched me in the face,
177
00:07:17,974 --> 00:07:20,713
and I'm still here.
178
00:07:20,715 --> 00:07:22,248
Happy eating waffles with you.
179
00:07:22,250 --> 00:07:26,135
Georgie, do you really
think you're capable
180
00:07:26,137 --> 00:07:27,637
of just being my friend?
181
00:07:27,639 --> 00:07:30,339
That's a good question.
182
00:07:30,341 --> 00:07:32,675
My brain says yes.
183
00:07:32,677 --> 00:07:34,477
What about the rest of you?
184
00:07:34,479 --> 00:07:37,013
Honestly, I wouldn't trust it.
185
00:07:37,015 --> 00:07:38,052
[LAUGHS]
186
00:07:39,484 --> 00:07:42,076
Excuse me. Would you
like to sign my petition
187
00:07:42,079 --> 00:07:43,936
against Happy Hearth Home Bakeries?
188
00:07:43,938 --> 00:07:46,489
Maybe on the way out.
189
00:07:46,491 --> 00:07:48,858
Excuse me. Would you
like to sign my petition
190
00:07:48,860 --> 00:07:50,743
against Happy Hearth Home Bakeries?
191
00:07:50,745 --> 00:07:52,945
Oh. Maybe on the way out.
192
00:07:52,947 --> 00:07:54,196
I hate to say it.
193
00:07:54,198 --> 00:07:55,781
But everybody's way out
194
00:07:55,783 --> 00:07:57,412
is at the other set of doors.
195
00:07:59,203 --> 00:08:01,504
I have noticed. Why
do you think that is?
196
00:08:01,506 --> 00:08:03,873
Cowards. The whole bunch of 'em.
197
00:08:05,822 --> 00:08:07,104
Mr. Givens!
198
00:08:07,107 --> 00:08:10,379
[SIGHS] Hello, Sheldon.
199
00:08:10,381 --> 00:08:13,049
Meemaw, this is my science
teacher, Mr. Givens.
200
00:08:13,051 --> 00:08:14,552
- Nice to meet ya.
- Hi.
201
00:08:14,555 --> 00:08:16,384
This is strange, I never think of you
202
00:08:16,387 --> 00:08:18,137
as existing outside of school.
203
00:08:18,139 --> 00:08:20,356
Well, it turns out I do.
204
00:08:20,358 --> 00:08:22,441
And you're here buying food.
205
00:08:22,443 --> 00:08:24,060
I am.
206
00:08:24,062 --> 00:08:25,978
Fascinating.
207
00:08:25,980 --> 00:08:27,813
All right.
208
00:08:27,815 --> 00:08:29,388
- Well, I'll see you on Monday.
- Wait.
209
00:08:29,391 --> 00:08:30,842
Would you like to sign my petition
210
00:08:30,845 --> 00:08:32,617
against Happy Hearth Home Bakeries?
211
00:08:32,620 --> 00:08:33,903
Well, what have they done?
212
00:08:33,905 --> 00:08:35,571
They're making their
bread faster and cheaper
213
00:08:35,573 --> 00:08:36,622
to save money.
214
00:08:36,624 --> 00:08:38,374
That's terrible.
215
00:08:38,376 --> 00:08:40,910
It is. Would you like to sign?
216
00:08:40,912 --> 00:08:42,995
- I would.
- Excellent.
217
00:08:42,997 --> 00:08:45,881
- I'll get you on the way out.
- Thank you.
218
00:08:47,418 --> 00:08:48,718
Well, that's one.
219
00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:50,753
Yeah.
220
00:08:56,427 --> 00:08:59,052
GEORGE JR.: I know it's
tough, but you gotta be strong.
221
00:08:59,055 --> 00:09:01,920
And remember, you're not alone.
222
00:09:01,923 --> 00:09:03,314
Hello?
223
00:09:03,317 --> 00:09:04,568
Kinda busy.
224
00:09:04,571 --> 00:09:06,784
Well, there's only one
bathroom in the house, Georgie,
225
00:09:06,787 --> 00:09:08,354
and it's not for phone calls.
226
00:09:08,356 --> 00:09:09,605
I got to call you back.
227
00:09:09,607 --> 00:09:11,912
Sorry.
228
00:09:11,915 --> 00:09:13,581
Who you talking to?
229
00:09:13,584 --> 00:09:15,248
That Veronica girl?
230
00:09:15,251 --> 00:09:16,445
Yeah.
231
00:09:16,447 --> 00:09:17,830
What's going on with that?
232
00:09:17,832 --> 00:09:19,498
Nothing. We're just friends.
233
00:09:19,500 --> 00:09:23,035
Okay. You ever want to run
any of this stuff by me,
234
00:09:23,037 --> 00:09:24,370
I'm here for you.
235
00:09:24,372 --> 00:09:26,422
Why would I want to run it by you?
236
00:09:26,424 --> 00:09:28,958
Well, I was once a 15-year-old boy.
237
00:09:28,960 --> 00:09:32,044
I know what it's like to have
strong feelings for a girl.
238
00:09:32,046 --> 00:09:36,132
Gross. I'm not gonna
talk to you about this.
239
00:09:36,134 --> 00:09:38,134
I-I saw that kid on Who's the Boss
240
00:09:38,136 --> 00:09:40,386
talk to Tony Danza about his problems.
241
00:09:40,388 --> 00:09:43,189
They're not related.
This is totally different.
242
00:09:49,063 --> 00:09:51,981
Damn it, Georgie, you
could flush once in a while.
243
00:09:51,983 --> 00:09:54,700
On behalf of sandwich-loving children
244
00:09:54,702 --> 00:09:56,318
everywhere, I thank you.
245
00:09:57,371 --> 00:09:59,488
- How many is that?
- 13.
246
00:09:59,490 --> 00:10:01,073
A baker's dozen. What do you say we
247
00:10:01,075 --> 00:10:02,537
pack up and head outta here?
248
00:10:02,540 --> 00:10:04,904
No, we have to wait for Channel 7 news.
249
00:10:04,907 --> 00:10:06,162
Channel 7?
250
00:10:06,164 --> 00:10:07,654
Yes. I called them this morning
251
00:10:07,657 --> 00:10:09,402
and told them there was
a human interest story
252
00:10:09,404 --> 00:10:10,633
at the supermarket.
253
00:10:10,635 --> 00:10:11,634
What story?
254
00:10:11,636 --> 00:10:13,073
Classic Americana.
255
00:10:13,076 --> 00:10:14,887
Little guy versus corporate greed.
256
00:10:14,889 --> 00:10:17,724
Honey, Channel 7 is not coming.
257
00:10:17,727 --> 00:10:19,143
[HORN HONKS]
258
00:10:20,060 --> 00:10:21,177
You Sheldon Cooper?
259
00:10:21,179 --> 00:10:22,311
Yes, ma'am.
260
00:10:22,313 --> 00:10:23,829
You got to be kidding me.
261
00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:25,216
How's my hair look?
262
00:10:32,573 --> 00:10:33,689
Hey, how'd it go?
263
00:10:33,691 --> 00:10:35,324
Great. Turn to Channel 7.
264
00:10:35,326 --> 00:10:36,659
But I'm watching the game.
265
00:10:36,661 --> 00:10:38,661
But I'm going to be on Channel 7.
266
00:10:38,663 --> 00:10:39,823
What's he talking about?
267
00:10:39,826 --> 00:10:42,364
He's gonna be on Channel 7.
268
00:10:43,873 --> 00:10:45,607
SHELDON [ON TV]: I was shocked to learn
269
00:10:45,610 --> 00:10:47,869
that the Happy Hearth Home
Bakeries had been bought out
270
00:10:47,872 --> 00:10:49,371
by the Domestic Food Corporation,
271
00:10:49,373 --> 00:10:52,041
and they started making their
bread faster and cheaper.
272
00:10:52,043 --> 00:10:54,510
- And you don't like that, do you?
- No.
273
00:10:54,512 --> 00:10:56,323
REPORTER: And you're
collecting signatures
274
00:10:56,326 --> 00:10:58,047
- to make them stop.
- I am.
275
00:10:58,049 --> 00:11:00,299
Corporations shouldn't
be allowed to make
276
00:11:00,301 --> 00:11:01,717
these decisions on their own.
277
00:11:01,719 --> 00:11:03,115
REPORTER: Well, who should?
278
00:11:03,118 --> 00:11:04,803
The people who eat the bread.
279
00:11:04,805 --> 00:11:07,223
This wouldn't happen if
there were centralized control
280
00:11:07,225 --> 00:11:08,917
over all these big corporations.
281
00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:10,503
REPORTER: Are you suggesting
282
00:11:10,506 --> 00:11:13,312
a communist form of government in Texas?
283
00:11:13,314 --> 00:11:15,865
- I suppose I am.
- MEEMAW: Hang on a sec...
284
00:11:15,867 --> 00:11:18,807
There you have it.
Local boy Sheldon Cooper
285
00:11:18,810 --> 00:11:21,927
says communism is what Texas needs.
286
00:11:23,693 --> 00:11:25,285
Oh, dear God.
287
00:11:28,025 --> 00:11:29,608
I just... You...
288
00:11:29,610 --> 00:11:31,910
Why... I-I-I-I-I...
289
00:11:31,913 --> 00:11:32,929
Why would you...
290
00:11:33,983 --> 00:11:35,232
What were you th...
291
00:11:35,235 --> 00:11:36,781
- Oh, God.
- MARY: Calm down.
292
00:11:36,783 --> 00:11:39,250
It was just the 4:00 news.
I'm sure no one saw it.
293
00:11:39,252 --> 00:11:40,785
I hope a lot of people saw it
294
00:11:40,787 --> 00:11:41,920
and Happy Hearth is forced
295
00:11:41,922 --> 00:11:43,505
to give our country good bread again.
296
00:11:43,507 --> 00:11:44,839
No! No more bread.
297
00:11:44,841 --> 00:11:46,765
No more country. No more talking.
298
00:11:48,295 --> 00:11:49,344
Excuse me.
299
00:11:49,346 --> 00:11:50,718
Where are you going?
300
00:11:50,721 --> 00:11:53,180
I'm gonna go put up an American
flag in front of my house.
301
00:11:53,183 --> 00:11:54,633
That's a great idea.
Mare, where's our flag?
302
00:11:54,635 --> 00:11:56,522
Uh, uh, it's in the garage.
303
00:11:59,473 --> 00:12:00,805
Is something wrong?
304
00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:03,558
Yes, Sheldon, something is wrong.
305
00:12:03,560 --> 00:12:05,644
- [DOORBELL RINGS]
- Oh, now what?
306
00:12:07,698 --> 00:12:09,864
Is anybody going to fill me in?
307
00:12:11,694 --> 00:12:13,027
Not a good time, Brenda.
308
00:12:13,030 --> 00:12:15,653
I don't want your boy
playing with my boy anymore.
309
00:12:15,656 --> 00:12:17,757
- Excuse me?
- [PHONE RINGING]
310
00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:19,157
Someone get that!
311
00:12:19,159 --> 00:12:21,209
I just saw Sheldon on the news.
312
00:12:21,211 --> 00:12:22,327
He doesn't need to be filling
313
00:12:22,329 --> 00:12:25,296
Billy's head with crazy commie ideas.
314
00:12:25,298 --> 00:12:27,749
Crazier than sitting on an
egg and trying to hatch it?
315
00:12:27,751 --> 00:12:30,669
'Cause I saw your precious
son do that the other day.
316
00:12:30,671 --> 00:12:33,138
Oh, so you're spying on us.
317
00:12:33,140 --> 00:12:35,557
Good to know.
318
00:12:35,559 --> 00:12:38,009
[GRUNTS]
319
00:12:38,011 --> 00:12:41,062
Yes, I do understand we're
in the middle of a cold war.
320
00:12:41,064 --> 00:12:42,347
But have you seen
321
00:12:42,349 --> 00:12:45,394
how many people wait in
line for bread in Moscow?
322
00:12:45,397 --> 00:12:47,937
It stands to reason
their bread must be great.
323
00:12:47,940 --> 00:12:49,222
Who you talking to?
324
00:12:49,225 --> 00:12:51,785
- A reporter from Time magazine.
- No!
325
00:12:51,788 --> 00:12:53,488
He didn't mean it.
326
00:12:53,491 --> 00:12:54,859
God bless America.
327
00:12:54,861 --> 00:12:57,028
[EXHALES]
328
00:13:05,255 --> 00:13:07,922
- Traitors.
- Yeah, go back to Russia.
329
00:13:07,924 --> 00:13:09,924
Go back?
330
00:13:09,926 --> 00:13:12,043
I've never been there
in the first place.
331
00:13:12,045 --> 00:13:13,762
Well, have a great day, Georgie.
332
00:13:13,764 --> 00:13:16,548
A great day? Are you out of your mind?
333
00:13:16,550 --> 00:13:18,394
Our lives are over.
334
00:13:18,397 --> 00:13:21,886
Well, you'll never have a
great day with that attitude.
335
00:13:21,888 --> 00:13:24,189
♪ You're a grand old flag ♪
336
00:13:24,191 --> 00:13:26,144
♪ You're a high-flying flag ♪
337
00:13:26,147 --> 00:13:29,527
♪ And forever in peace may you wave ♪
338
00:13:29,529 --> 00:13:33,898
♪ You're the emblem of the land I love ♪
339
00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:36,429
♪ The home of the free and the... ♪
340
00:13:41,074 --> 00:13:44,492
Look, you made my mom's note.
341
00:13:45,579 --> 00:13:48,246
"Don't talk to Sheldon. Mom."
342
00:13:48,248 --> 00:13:51,549
That's fine. I usually
do most of the talking.
343
00:13:51,551 --> 00:13:53,452
Yes, you do.
344
00:13:53,455 --> 00:13:56,933
♪ My country, 'tis of thee ♪
345
00:13:56,936 --> 00:14:00,754
♪ Sweet land of liberty ♪
346
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:03,928
♪ Of thee I sing ♪
347
00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:07,960
♪ Land where our fathers died, la... ♪
348
00:14:07,963 --> 00:14:09,046
Sing along.
349
00:14:09,049 --> 00:14:11,820
♪ Land of the pilgrims' pride... ♪
350
00:14:11,822 --> 00:14:13,772
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
351
00:14:24,117 --> 00:14:26,451
Mind if I sit?
352
00:14:26,453 --> 00:14:28,837
Y-You sure you want to be seen with me?
353
00:14:28,839 --> 00:14:31,956
Oh, please. You're not a commie.
354
00:14:33,043 --> 00:14:34,793
Everyone else seems to think I am.
355
00:14:34,795 --> 00:14:37,295
Do you even know what a communist is?
356
00:14:37,297 --> 00:14:40,652
Yeah. It's the big blond
guy Rocky fights in Rocky IV.
357
00:14:40,655 --> 00:14:43,134
And he also fights them when he's Rambo.
358
00:14:43,136 --> 00:14:44,882
[CHUCKLES] That's it?
359
00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:48,199
Well, I know in every movie it looks
like the commies are gonna win,
360
00:14:48,202 --> 00:14:49,607
but they don't.
361
00:14:49,609 --> 00:14:51,476
[LAUGHS]
362
00:14:51,478 --> 00:14:53,144
You ever seen any Rocky movies?
363
00:14:53,146 --> 00:14:55,313
Um, I saw Rocky II.
364
00:14:55,315 --> 00:14:57,413
That's the second one.
365
00:14:57,416 --> 00:15:04,955
♪ Oh, say, does that
star-spangled banner ♪
366
00:15:04,958 --> 00:15:08,710
♪ Yet wave... ♪
367
00:15:08,712 --> 00:15:10,995
Hey, you wanted to see me?
368
00:15:10,997 --> 00:15:12,497
Have a seat.
369
00:15:14,634 --> 00:15:17,135
[SIGHS]
370
00:15:19,443 --> 00:15:22,277
Guess what I've been getting
a lot of calls about today.
371
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,475
I know it looks bad,
but we're handling it.
372
00:15:24,477 --> 00:15:26,054
It-It'll all blow over.
373
00:15:26,057 --> 00:15:27,728
I'm sorry, George, but I can't have
374
00:15:27,731 --> 00:15:31,065
a suspected communist coaching our boys.
375
00:15:31,067 --> 00:15:33,484
[CHUCKLES]: Whoa, Tom. I'm not...
376
00:15:33,486 --> 00:15:35,186
I love my country.
377
00:15:35,188 --> 00:15:37,405
This is just Sheldon
getting bent out of shape
378
00:15:37,407 --> 00:15:38,690
over a loaf of bread.
379
00:15:38,692 --> 00:15:41,693
Well, this bread better be
worth you losing your job.
380
00:15:41,695 --> 00:15:44,112
Now, hang on. G-Give
me a chance to fix it.
381
00:15:45,665 --> 00:15:46,748
Please.
382
00:15:46,750 --> 00:15:48,499
[SIGHS]
383
00:15:48,501 --> 00:15:51,007
All right, George.
384
00:15:51,010 --> 00:15:53,037
But if I hear from one
more angry parent...
385
00:15:53,039 --> 00:15:55,673
Thank you. Thank you.
386
00:15:56,710 --> 00:15:58,927
[PHONE RINGS]
387
00:15:58,929 --> 00:16:00,879
He's not here.
388
00:16:06,052 --> 00:16:08,553
Mary, you understand
these people are atheists.
389
00:16:08,555 --> 00:16:10,488
I get it. They're not my people.
390
00:16:10,491 --> 00:16:11,843
You're my people.
391
00:16:11,846 --> 00:16:13,233
Then what's this all about?
392
00:16:13,236 --> 00:16:15,142
My son just wanted a better sandwich.
393
00:16:15,145 --> 00:16:18,062
Why is this so hard for
y'all to understand?!
394
00:16:18,064 --> 00:16:19,781
♪ From the mountains ♪
395
00:16:19,783 --> 00:16:21,866
♪ To the prairies ♪
396
00:16:21,868 --> 00:16:26,237
♪ To the oceans white with foam ♪
397
00:16:26,239 --> 00:16:30,347
♪ God bless America ♪
398
00:16:30,350 --> 00:16:34,746
♪ Our home sweet home... ♪
399
00:16:34,748 --> 00:16:36,547
- Pinko!
- Screw you!
400
00:16:36,549 --> 00:16:41,586
♪ God bless America... ♪
401
00:16:41,588 --> 00:16:43,171
MAN: Three, two...
402
00:16:43,173 --> 00:16:44,472
Thanks for having me on.
403
00:16:44,474 --> 00:16:46,569
You're welcome. Now, I understand
404
00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:48,175
you wanted to set the record straight
405
00:16:48,178 --> 00:16:49,928
regarding your son's communism.
406
00:16:49,930 --> 00:16:51,479
Yes. N-No!
407
00:16:51,481 --> 00:16:53,848
He's not a communist.
He's ten years old.
408
00:16:53,850 --> 00:16:55,957
Listen, I fought for this country.
409
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:57,402
I love this country.
410
00:16:57,404 --> 00:16:58,853
My kids love this country.
411
00:16:58,855 --> 00:17:00,104
Isn't that right, Sheldon?
412
00:17:00,106 --> 00:17:01,606
Yes.
413
00:17:01,608 --> 00:17:03,574
Although, in all fairness,
414
00:17:03,576 --> 00:17:05,743
the Social Security
system is a form of...
415
00:17:05,745 --> 00:17:08,014
- You love this country!
- I love this country.
416
00:17:19,994 --> 00:17:23,261
I have something important
that I'd like to say.
417
00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:27,795
These last few days,
418
00:17:27,798 --> 00:17:29,547
I've been giving the new
Happy Hearth bread
419
00:17:29,550 --> 00:17:30,924
another chance, and I've decided
420
00:17:30,925 --> 00:17:32,477
it's not so bad.
421
00:17:34,613 --> 00:17:36,507
Also, it toasts well.
422
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,659
So, I'm going to say
423
00:17:40,662 --> 00:17:43,578
that's a sign of personal
growth on my part.
424
00:17:43,581 --> 00:17:45,656
In fact, let's call it maturity.
425
00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:55,039
Still not talking to me, huh?
426
00:17:55,042 --> 00:17:58,375
Well... I'll check back in tomorrow.
427
00:17:58,378 --> 00:18:02,581
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-- www.Addic7ed.com --
427
00:18:03,305 --> 00:18:09,680
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