Original subtitles

♪ Vampirina ♪

♪ We were normal vampires In Transylvania ♪

♪ Like the other monsters On every block ♪

♪ Till we packed our things And we flapped our wings ♪

♪ And we got a case Of human race culture shock ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

♪ I may be blue With pointy teeth ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

♪ But I'm not so different Underneath ♪

♪ It's true that our taste May be a little offbeat ♪

♪ But we're the battiest Monsters you'll ever meet ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

♪ A ghoulish girl In a human world ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

♪ It may seem strange But it's true ♪

♪ I'm just like you ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

(Vampirina) "The Big Bite".

Hurry, the show is about to start.

(all) I call the best spot on the couch.

Good thing there's room for both of us.

Whoopsies.

P-P-Please turn on the show.

Welcome, everyone, to Pennsylvania's most popular cooking show.

(all) The Big Bite.

I'm your host, Trevor Porkpie.

And today, we'll be watching two of Pennsylvania's

finest compete for the Best Chef award.

Can't wait.

I'm on the edge of my seat. Literally.

(Trevor) And that's all for this time, on...

(all) The Big Bite.

To all you chefs out there who want to be on the show,

sent us a letter that tells us a bit about you

and your cooking.

If you've got the chops, we'll bring you on as a competitor.

Chef Remy, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Are you thinking that some of my cobweb caramel

would go perfectly with this human popcorn?

No. But that sounds amazing.

Which is why you should go on The Big Bite.

Oh, it would be a scream come true.

I love The Big Bite.

It inspires me to be a better chef for monsters and the humans.

But Chef Remy Bones on television? No.

I do not think this is possible.

Hmm.

Chef Remy, you did it.

You're a competitor on The Big Bite.

I sent in a letter for you,

and they want you on the show tomorrow.

Me? On The Big Bite? Oh, that is so sweet of you.

But also so crazy.

Yeah, won't people get a bit screamy

if they see, you know, a skeleton on TV?

Screamy isn't even the half of it.

Shrieky, screechy, squealy.

One look at those beautiful bones of yours, and it's all over.

Oh, the ghost is correct.

My bones would scare everyone.

Then how about we dress you up?

I haven't had hair since the French Revolution.

Now that is chef chic. You should totally go on the show.

But I would have to cook human food, no?

Yeah, but you've been cooking for my human friends for over a year.

That is true.

Poppy and Bridget really enjoy my Chef Remy Bones creations.

As long as I leave out the eyeballs.

♪ Back when I was a boy I had only one dream ♪

♪ From that hollow black void In my ribs ♪

♪ All the monsters And humans ♪

♪ They'd shriek And they'd scream ♪

♪ While they tuck in Their napkins like bibs ♪

♪ As a fang-tastic cook I would reach the whole world ♪

♪ All my recipes Rate off the charts ♪

♪ With my spooky cookbook ♪

♪ And my apron unfurled ♪

♪ I would cook my way Into their hearts ♪

♪ And now this is my chance Oh, I know I'll do well ♪

♪ It's the big break Chef Remy deserves ♪

♪ Yes, the heart I don't have I can still feel it swell ♪

♪ I'd be nervous Except I lack nerves ♪

♪ With my ghoulish soufflé And my creepy croissant ♪

♪ I'm a master Of boo-linary arts ♪

♪ All their eyeballs on me They're on slime-time TV ♪

♪ Will I win? Oh, mais oui ♪

♪ I'm a skull-lebrity ♪

♪ As I cook my way ♪

♪ Into their hearts ♪

Now, for the show, I need a sous chef.

Someone who can assist me in the kitchen,

and help me chop, fry and boil my way to success.

Vee, will you do this for me?

Absolutely.

Hi, everyone, I'm Trevor Pork Pie.

Welcome to The Big Bite.

(audience) The Big Bite.

All the way from the catacombs of Paris,

he's wowed Dracula with his yeti spaghetti,

and pleased King Tut with his cobweb casserole.

It's Chef Remy Bones.

(audience cheers)

We also have famous foodie, Mr. Froufington.

(Chef Remy) Froufington?

He really knows his stuff.

And today's guest judge is Mr. Gore.

Always curious how cooking works,

Mr. Gore likes to combine science and food

and create delicious meals.

-Oh. Hello, Vee. -Hi, Mr. Gore.

There are three rounds of cooking.

After they're all completed, Mr. Gore will name the best chef.

You look familiar. Do I know you?

N-N-No, I don't think so.

You must be thinking of me. I'm Vampirina.

we met when you stayed at my parents' scare B&B.

Ah, of course.

Lovely to see you.

-Well, good luck to you both. -You too.

Oh! Thank you, Vee.

You really saved my spine out there.

Contestants, the first round is... soup!

Ready, set, cook.

So, what are we going to make?

Hmm, I could definitely make my scream of spook-chini soup.

Poppy and Bridget love that one.

No, I will think of what Mr. Gore would like.

Hmm.

Mr. Gore is human,

quite boring, and look at that sweater.

No pizzazz.

I've got it.

I need a pot of water and the vegetables.

-Tout suite. -Coming right up.

This is something Mr. Gore will love.

I can feel it in my bones.

Here, stir this pot.

On it.

Okay, stand back. There it is.

I call it the soup du bore.

Is that it?

(laughs) I almost forgot the final touch.

All right, time's up.

It is a bowl of very plain broth.

Oh, and a slice of white bread.

It's... well, it's simple.

All right, Mr. Froufington, your turn.

Froufington's French onion soup.

Hmm.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, my goodness.

The fusion of cheese and onions is... it is just exquisite.

Now that is what I call turning a solid into a liquid.

All right, everyone.

It's off to round two, where the chefs will compete

to see who can make the better pizza.

Oh, I thought for sure the boring soup

would be a hit with the boring Mr. Gore.

I bet old Froufy knows just what to make for him.

(humming)

Hmm.

Oh, I've got it.

Since Froufy knows what he's doing,

I'll make the same pizza as him.

You're just going to copy Froufy?

Oui.

I don't know if that's a great idea.

It will be magnifique.

But we can't serve the exact same pizza as Froufington.

And this dish doesn't have that Chef Remy Bones flair.

Maybe you should put your own spin on it.

Perhaps a little Chef Remy spin on this wouldn't hurt.

There we go.

Chefs, please present your dishes to the judge.

Five-cheese pizza with homemade pomodoro sauce.

Oh, very advanced flavor compounds.

That might be the best pizza that I have ever had.

Voilà. It is the similar pizza, but with one cheese.

Huh. Well, I really like the design.

Mm. It's very... creative.

Now time for the final round,

where each chef can make their own favorite dish.

Oh, sacrebleu! This is nonsense.

Chef Remy.

Oh, this is not how I dreamed being on a cooking show would be.

I was sure I would get the love.

There's one more round. You still have a chance to win.

But Mr. Gore clearly likes Froufy's food better.

You know what Mr. Gore did like?

The design, because that was totally original, and totally you.

Oui. It was.

So this time, why don't you just go for it

and make a one-of-a-kind Chef Remy creation?

What if they don't like it

and I am embarrassed on all of the television?

I know it's scary, but you just have to be yourself.

Even if you don't win, at least you cooked from your heart.

I may be a skeleton, but I do have a big heart.

Vee, you are an excellent sous chef.

And an even better friend.

All right, time to peel these oranges.

Butter, please. Transylvanian tomato.

Spellery. Voilà.

(timer dings)

Mm.

Smells spook-tacular, Chef Remy.

I think this is really you.

Not without the secret ingredient.

Okay, chefs, please present your dishes.

In three, two, one...

It's my special salmon mousse.

Mm. Wow, that is really neat.

Presenting a Chef Remy Bones original.

Detonating duck l'orange.

It is sure to be an explosion of flavor.

Uh-oh. Maybe this dish is too Chef Remy.

Mm, mm...

My goodness. We've never seen that before.

When you said it would be an explosion of flavor,

you really meant it.

Wow.

That was absolutely wonderful.

I've never had such a tasty and unusual dish.

You must have an impressive knowledge of chemistry.

-(applause) -Whoo!

Chef Remy, you did it.

Mr. Gore, who is the best chef?

Mr. Froufington's dishes were impressive,

but Chef Remy Bones' detonating duck l'orange

was the best thing that I have ever tasted.

And the biggest surprise of the night.

For his inventiveness and creativity,

the winner is... Chef Remy Bones!

My pièce de résistance.

Mwah!

What a truly fantastic performance.

It's a truly fantastic performance that we've seen 40 times.

-(laughs) -And I never could have done it

without my most inspiring sous chef.

So, I got you something as a little thank-you present.

My very own chef hat?

I love it.

Now, how about we get that detonating duck l'orange

-from the oven? -(explosion)

I think it's done.

(laughs) Yup.

It really is a Chef Remy Bones original.

(all chattering)

(Vampirina) "Ghost Host".

(Edgar) A sign from a real-life werewolf?

Or just a paint scratch from a clumsy human?

Find out next time, on Weekly Weirdness:

the Tale of the Werewolf, Part 57.

(cackles)

One more follower.

(sneezes)

(sniffles)

♪ We know your spooky game Is strong ♪

♪ And you belong ♪

♪ With Transylvania girls ♪

(all laugh)

We sound pretty rocking.

Yeah. Nice spooky-lele riff, Vee.

Thanks, I've been working on it.

You guys, I officially have nine followers.

Not seven, not eight, but nine.

That's awesome, Edgar.

It's more than awesome. It's... ah...

Ahh-mazing?

-Ah... -Out of this world?

(sneezes) Oh, man!

Edgar Allan Peepleson, what are you doing over here?

You are sickity sick and need to be in bed resting.

But, Mom, I haven't even made tomorrow's episode

of Weekly Weirdness.

I'm about to have 10 followers.

Double digits.

(sneezes)

And I'm about to take you to the doctor.

You need to come home and go to bed

before those sneezy sniffles get the best of you.

But how am I going to put out a new video if I'm in bed?

Maybe we can help?

Yeah, we can make a video for you.

-Really? -(Vampirina) Sure.

We were just rehearsing our new song.

We could record it for tomorrow's show.

Hmm, I don't know.

A rock band video?

My fan base is more into monstery-ish things.

Some would even call them a tough crowd.

Plus, I was planning to release

Tale of the Werewolf, Part... Fifty...

(sneezes)

Sounds like you're getting sicker by the second.

We may have to just go with our Ghoul Girls song.

We promise it'll be rocking.

Okay. I guess it can't hurt.

And I don't want to let my fans down.

I'm out... Out... (sneezes)

♪ We can all be ♪

♪ Transylvania girls ♪

♪ And ghosts and ghouls ♪

♪ Are the coolest ♪

♪ We know your spooky game Is strong ♪

(Demi) Perfect. Loving this close-up.

Oh, yes, I like this wide shot very much.

Okay, wider. Wider still! Aah! Okay, too wide.

♪ Transylvania girls ♪

One more click and Edgar's newest episode

of Weekly Weirdness is online.

I can't wait to see you gals spook out on the small screen.

I hope everybody likes it.

Maybe we can even get Edgar some more followers.

That's sure to make him feel better.

Yeah, more people watching would make him feel great.

Well, we'll see in the morning.

Fingers crossed.

(owl hooting)

(birds tweeting)

-Huh? -(gasps)

One hundred and ninety-nine followers?

Our video got 199 followers?

All thanks to my amazing filmmaking skills.

Oh, and you and the Ghoul Girls rocking out, of course.

(laughs)

I can't believe it.

We can't either.

One hundred and ninety-nine fans.

Edgar's going to flip once he feels better.

He's still sick?

Hmm. Then we have to make more videos.

As they say in Transylvania, the monster show must go on.

I don't know, Edgar is pretty picky about what goes on in his show.

But if we don't do any videos, he won't really have a show.

Yeah, we'd be doing him a favor, and just until he's better.

And maybe even get him some more followers.

That's true.

Okay, I'm in.

-Me too. -Me three!

I really have the face to be a star, if you haven't noticed.

Oh, oh, oh, this is my good side.

No? Oh, okay. Maybe someday.

Hmm. So how do we get more people to watch our videos?

They have to go viral.

You know, a video that everyone will see.

Everyone? Whoa, let's think. What do you guys like to watch?

People opening presents, funny dances...

Flash mobs, surprises.

As a ghoul who knows a thing or two about the World Wide Cobweb,

zombie cat videos, hands down.

Back in Transylvania, that video of a zombie cat

snuggling into Frankenstein's snow boots went totally viral.

I mean, everybody saw that one.

Well, our videos are for humans, so they can't have a zombie cat.

But it sounds like we have some other bat-tastic ideas

that everyone will like.

Let's see how many followers we can get.

You know, for Edgar.

(giggling) Right.

Let's make some videos.

People are going to love this one.

When I call "action", open the present and see what's inside.

Okay. I've never starred in my own video before.

I'm nervous.

Stay in the moment.

That's what I did when I starred in the film, Knock, Knock, Boo.

Huge hit.

-Presents, take one. -Action.

What could it be?

(all scream)

-Cut. Print. Perfect. -Huh?

Oh, I thought you'd never open me.

I've got a soufflé in the oven.

(all laugh)

That was a good one.

I assure you, my soufflé is no laughing matter.

(all laugh)

Oh, you can't write this stuff. This is going to be such a hit.

I know. I can feel it.

Maybe with the next video, we can go even bigger.

Bolder. Battier.

We owe it to Edgar and his fans.

(mewling)

(all laughing)

If we zoom in like this,

we'll get the most dramatic effect possible.

Bum-bum-bum!

Uh, Vee? Are you sure Edgar will like all this

fancy camera stuff on his show?

Totally. It'll make the videos so fun to watch,

which means it'll get him more fans.

-He'll love it. -Hey, guys.

I'm feeling way better.

Edgar, you're back.

Yeah, and I'm so ready to get back to my monster-hunting magic.

Did my fans miss me?

Oh, yeah, all 399 of them.

What? Oh, no way!

We have so many new followers.

And you're going to love what we've done with the show,

-I just know it. -What you've done?

Yeah, we spooked out with a whole new style.

-It's so much fun. -Okay.

Um, how new is the style?

So glad you asked. I've been dying to show you.

What?

My mom helped us post the videos. Pretty fang-tastic.

-(mewling) -(Vampirina laughs)

Ah, Opera Cat. Big hit. And I mean, monster big.

So many new fans.

People love my cat.

But cats aren't monsters. Cats are boring.

Not really my thing.

What do you mean? It's a hit.

But it is Edgar's show, so maybe that's a wrap for us?

Thanks for helping out.

But now that I'm back, if I stick with videos

about monsters for other kids who like monsters.

I love monsters.

I can help you with anything and everything monsters.

I'm a treasure box of monster information.

We can make the coolest monster video of all time.

Well, I really wanted to get going on Part 57

of The Tale of the Werewolf.

Even better. Werewolves it is.

This is going to be so much fun, Edgar.

I don't know, Vee.

Our video will be a showstopper.

You don't know until you try.

One last show together? For the most fun ever?

Okay.

(Vampirina) You look great.

Like a million monster bucks.

Do you think the glitter is too much, Vee?

I don't know if Edgar's fans will recognize him.

Yeah, it doesn't feel like me.

Let's just shoot it and see how it turns out.

And action!

Now this scratch could be nothing, or could it lead us

to The Tale of the Werewolf, Part 57.

Cue dancing werewolves.

What?

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop! Stop! Stop!

Cut! Everything okay?

Should we get you some tap shoes too?

Because I think we have another hit on our paws.

I mean, hands. Werewolf speak.

No, we're good on tap shoes, and what am I saying?

This whole glittery jacket and silly hair stuff just isn't me.

I like dirt, and monsters, and all things spooky.

But this is the type of show that gets viewers.

Everybody loves tap dancing werewolves.

It's not my type of show. This is not what I do.

-What do you mean? -I don't care if tons of people see it.

As long as I get to make the monster videos I love,

I'm happy. And so are my nine followers.

This feels more like your show now.

-Huh? -You can keep it.

I'm out.

(Vampirina) I don't know what happened.

Why doesn't Edgar like how the new show's going?

For the record, I loved it. Huge fan.

Thanks. I thought I was helping him by getting more fans.

That's what he's always wanted. I just wanted to make him happy.

Yeah, but you sort of changed the show.

It became a whole different thing.

Not Weekly Weirdness at all.

It wasn't about what Edgar loves.

♪ You added kittens and dance To his wacky web show ♪

♪ And we made a fang-tastic Fun video ♪

♪ But maybe that's not What the show really is ♪

♪ We made it ours Instead of his ♪

♪ You got to let your friends Do their own thing ♪

♪ Help them find the song That they want to sing ♪

♪ Let's put the show back To the way that it was ♪

♪ That's what A true friend does ♪

♪ I've always known that Edgar's Different from me ♪

♪ But that's the thing That makes him awesome, I see ♪

♪ Yes, whether humans, witches Vampires or elves ♪

♪ We all got to be ourselves ♪

♪ You've got to let your friends Be who they are ♪

♪ Help them be themselves And they will go far ♪

♪ Let Edgar be Edgar ♪

♪ We'll help him because ♪

♪ That what A true friend does ♪

You're right. I was trying to change Edgar and his show.

Edgar, I really think you should come back to Weekly Weirdness.

I don't know. It's not the same anymore.

Yeah, that was my fault.

I'm really sorry about changing the show,

and trying to change you.

I'd never want someone to do that to me.

And those dancing werewolves, that was a big mistake.

How they tap-danced in all that fur, I'll never know.

Impressive skills.

(both laugh)

I should have just let you be you.

You're pretty cool the way you already are.

Thanks. You're pretty cool yourself.

And there is still time to film

The Tale of the Werewolf, Part 57.

So far, Part 46 has been my favorite.

-You watch all my episodes? -Of course.

Who do you think fan number four is?

And you know what?

I think I saw some paw prints right over...

here that we need to check out.

(Edgar) Thanks for tuning in to the...

(all) Tale of the Werewolf, Part 57.

Aw. Werewolves. So cute.

(Edgar) What?

Ten followers. Double digits. Yes!

-That's so awesome. -Way to go.

(laughs)

My true fan base is back. We did it.

You did it, with a true Edgar original.

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