Original subtitles

Oh, shit! I'm locked out!

Hi. Um, look, I've already bought cookies and I don't need any more.

No, I'm April. I'm your next door neighbor.

Oh, okay. Hey, how are you doing? I'm Kerwin.

Nice to meet you, Kerwin.

This is kind of embarrassing but I just locked myself out of my house

and I have to go to work and I...

do you just... is there any way that you have anything I could maybe wear?

Um, well, let me see if I can go find something for you.

Awesome!

Well, um, there's this. I was using it as a rag but,

uh, you can have it if you want. - Um, that would be great.

Oh, you know what? How do I know that, you

know, I'm going to get it back?

I'm going to need some sort of collateral. I don't have anything on me.

What about your thong? I mean, it's a skirt

and, uh, you're not going to need it anyways after you put it on, so...

I guess that makes sense. Can I have the skirt first?

No. Why don't you give me the thong first?

Here you go. Oh, I'm sorry about that.

Uh, it's a little small. What? You don't want it?

No, um, it's good. Can you see my ass?

- No, no, it looks fine. - Uh, can you see my pussy?

No, no, you're alright.

Okay. Thanks, Kirwin. I gotta go to work now. Yeah, sure.

Whatever.

Wait, you don't have a shirt I could maybe wear?

No, I shouldn't have. Sorry.

April...

Where have you been? You should have been

here half an hour ago. You're 30 minutes late.

Um... Have you been drinking?

No. I just got locked out of my house. I had

to go to the neighbor's house to get this

skirt, and then there was an accident with

some beer. You're not going to fire me, are you?

you? No, maybe not this time. But,

there has to be some consequences for your lack of punctuality.

Here. Representatives from the home office

in Arkham are going to be here tomorrow, and

I want this place spotless by the time you leave, okay?

Yes, Mr. Kirwin.

Look, I said I need this really clean. I need

you to get down there and get rid of all this

grime. It's still dirty. Here. Put some elbow grease on it.

Much better, April. Yes, you're doing a fine

job, Ms. Argyle. I think the corporate office

representatives would be pleased. You aren't

quite finished yet, though. Remember to clean

the shelves as well. Mr. Kirwin?

Well, great.

Look, I told you I don't want a subscription

to Bass Fisherman Weekly Magazine.

Um, no. It's me, April, from this morning.

Oh, hey April. How are you?

Okay. I'm still locked out of my house, though,

and I was kind of hoping you could help me.

Oh, bummer. Look, well, I guess I'm not doing

anything right now, but I'm going to need

to get that skirt off of you, though.

Oh, okay. Can I give it back to you after we get into the house?

Yeah, you know, it might be a better idea

right now because I might forget later on.

Oh, okay. Could I have my underwear back then, too?

Your underwear, yeah. Um, my dog ran off with

it, so I'll keep an eye out for it, and if

I see it, I'll bring it back to you, for sure.

All right, let's hit it.

Okay. Let me just make sure this door is completely

locked. Damn it, do you want to give this a try?

You know what? I would, but I kind of strained my arm the other

night by playing some weed bowling, and it might not be a good idea.

You know what? What about this over here?

Well, it looks like it would be a tight fit. Maybe if you could lift me?

Sure, that sounds good. Like, I don't want to

injure it again because of that weed tennis thing.

Okay, I'll just climb on that hose thing.

I think I'm stuck.

Oh, that's a bummer, man.

Can you help me?

Yeah, you know, I would, but that weed golf just really did a number on me.

Okay, I think I'm just going to get myself unstuck. What? Ah! What's that?

Oh, sorry. I spilled my beer. Hey, look, is this going to take long?

Because I have a burrito in the microwave,

and I've got to get over to it.

Ah, guys. I'm sorry. I just didn't think it would take this long.

Look, I have some lotion in my car. I think if I lubricate

myself, I can get in through the window. I'll be right back.

Here it is. Could you help me put it on?

Cool. Um, hang on a second.

Wait.

Okay, I think that's enough.

Oh, hang on a second. I think I might have missed a spot.

That's okay. I think I'm just going to try anyways.

We did it! Thanks for your help, Kerwin.

Hey, anything for a neighbor.

Um, do you think I could get my shirt

back? That was a gift from my grandmother.

Oh, you know what? I kind of think you owe me.

Well, is there something else I could do for you instead?

Um, I don't know. What did you have in mind?

I could knit you some socks.

I think I'll pass.

I could suck you off.

Do you deep throw?

Yeah.

Do you swallow?

No, sorry.

Oh, you know what? I remember I have that

burrito in the microwave I need to get to.

Okay, I'll swallow. Do you want me to open the door to let you in?

No, that's alright. I think maybe we should do it on the front lawn.

Okay, I guess that makes sense.

You know, I'd really like to come over and play Wii bowling sometime.

Oh, you know, I'm sorry. I got a Playstation.

What's up?

I just got locked out of my house. I had to leave this house to get this skirt.

And I was asked to disappear.

I don't remember.

No, I'm April. I'm your next door neighbor.

April.

Where have you been? You should have been here...

I'm not really a friendly person.

No.