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WOMAN OVER SPEAKER:
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We noticed abnormal activity
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on your credit card,
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so we just need you
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to confirm or deny
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some of the recent charges.
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Okay. Thank you.
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$20 to Netflix?
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Yeah.
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$20 to Blockbuster Online?
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Both?
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I needed all eleven
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disks of Gossip Girl
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at the same time.
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$120 in tuition
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to Hogwarts School
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of Witchcraft and Wizardry?
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They give you a little wand,
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and a diploma. It's fun.
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What did you major in?
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Potions.
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You know,
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I'm gonna take you
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off speakerphone.
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Go ahead.
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Jessica Simpson
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clip-in hair extensions?
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No. Okay... Um,
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I wore those once.
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It was a money-back guarantee,
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but I forgot to return them.
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Man Pillow,
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the pillow shaped like a man?
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Oh, God.
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Also something
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called "Bucket of Cake."
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Yeah, you know what?
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I think someone
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definitely stole
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my credit card.
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So why don't you
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just cancel it?
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Do you wanna hear
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what else they purchased?
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Yes.
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No, you don't have
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to refund anything.
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Just cancel the credit card
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and we'll all go on
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with our lives. Thank you.
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So, what does
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a Man Pillow look like?
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Daniel Craig.
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It's for my lower back.
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My name is Keef,
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and I am your friend.
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Are you guys my friends?
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Yeah.
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All right! Awesome!
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It is playground time!
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Well, we're here in Eagleton.
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It's two towns over.
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And we're all
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volunteering for Kaboom,
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a service organization
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that says it builds
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a playground in a day.
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High five!
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High five! High five!
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I never trust anything
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that comes that quickly.
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That's why I don't
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eat Minute Rice.
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So this whole "build
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a playground in a day" thing,
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I mean, that's just
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a slogan, right?
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Nope. One day, 24 hours.
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Keef, that is so incredible.
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I mean, I work in Parks,
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and I know how hard it is
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to get something done.
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Not if you have
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the Kaboom spirit.
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You can look at a problem,
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and you can either go,
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"Oh, this is a problem"
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or you can kaboom,
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blow it up and turn
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it into something great.
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You literally
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kaboom the problem.
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Come on, people!
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I see more ground
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than playground!
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Kaboom.
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Don't do that.
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One, two, three.
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Man, this is tough.
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Yeah, but just think
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of all the kids
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that'll swing on this swing,
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fat kids, skinny kids,
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brainiacs, sluts,
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the gay drama kids,
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goths, jocks,
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the alternative crowd.
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Mmm-hmm.
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Hey, Leslie. Hi.
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Whoa. Ann.
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What are you doing here?
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Oh! I'm volunteering.
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I love to volunteer.
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The key to volunteering?
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A lot of pockets.
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For putting all the food in.
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The Red Cross
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has amazing cookies.
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I go there all the time.
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Meals On Wheels
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was a bonanza.
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Suicide Hotline,
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surprisingly lame spread.
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I thought I'd give back
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to those less
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fortunate than myself.
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You live in a pit.
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Not anymore.
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Living with the drummer
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of my band.
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Living indoors,
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pretty cool, not to brag.
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Kind of hard not to.
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Anyhow, got to go,
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me and an old Asian lady
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are double-teaming
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some monkey bars. So...
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Hey, look.
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I got a remote control
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and I'm controlling you.
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Go faster. Go faster.
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Go faster, Ron's the master.
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Well.
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You have been
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officially kaboomed.
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Whoa. Look at you two
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and your big kabooms.
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Great job. I got gifts.
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Oh!
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There you go, for you.
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And
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one more for you.
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Thank you.
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So, you guys gonna join us
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tomorrow in Muncie?
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No, I wish, but back
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to the real world.
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At least you guys will be
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kabooming somewhere, right?
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Remember,
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you take a man kabooming,
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he kabooms for a day.
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But you teach
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a man how to kaboom.
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Kaboom, kaboom, kaboom.
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Oh, I'm so pumped.
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Feel I could
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take on the world.
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I could prep, like,
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a thousand diagnostic tests.
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In an hour.
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That's the spirit.
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There it is, the pit.
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Hmm.
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There's something
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I wish I could kaboom.
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Well, we are.
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It's just a slow-boom.
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A slower,
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more deliberate kaboom.
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Yeah. Totally.
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See you tomorrow.
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Okay.
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You know what
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this mess is?
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This is a list of things
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we have to complete
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before we fill in
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the pit
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behind Ann's house.
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You know what this is?
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This is a kaboomer.
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Jerry, did you use
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permanent marker again?
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I'm sorry, guys, I...
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I just grabbed the wrong...
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This is a big...
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I grabbed the wrong...
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This isn't gonna...
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Open very big, Jerry.
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Okay. Forget it.
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Let's all pretend
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Jerry wasn't born.
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And this is clean.
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How do we speed
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up the process?
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How do we kaboom it?
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Rules, codes,
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permits, red tape.
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I never realized
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how frustrating it is
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to be in the government.
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In my next life,
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I'm going into
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private industry.
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Maybe strip mining.
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Okay, everybody take
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out their thinking caps
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and rip them up.
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Then take out
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your doing caps,
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'cause we're gonna
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do something today.
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I have a couple of
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doing caps in my wallet.
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That's what I call condoms.
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Come on, Tom. Focus, please.
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How do we cut
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through the red tape
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and how do we get this
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pit filled in? Ideas?
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We need to cut through
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the red tape and get
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the pit filled in.
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Yes, Tom. Good.
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Okay, everybody else
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needs to participate.
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Come on, guys.
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These suggestions aren't
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gonna suggest themselves.
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Yes, Jerry.
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This idea better be good.
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Ann?
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I support you.
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Good.
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You could petition
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to expedite the Architecture
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Review Board process.
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Mark, buddy,
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you're not listening to me.
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I want to kaboom it. Okay?
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Can I talk to you
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outside really quick?
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Sure.
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Mark's gonna help me,
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so thanks for nothing,
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Jerry.
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Good job, Ann.
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So you really wanna
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get this pit filled in?
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Yes.
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And you'll do
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whatever it takes?
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Mark, I am so sick
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of moving like a slug.
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I want to move
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like a cheetah.
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Or a slug driving
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a remote controlled car.
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Something more plausible
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than that, but fast.
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Would you break the rules?
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I won't murder.
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That's good to know.
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But it's
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actually very simple.
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If you wanna fill in the pit,
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just go fill it in.
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Don't ask for permission,
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ask for forgiveness.
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Oh, I like that.
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Okay, wow.
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So who gives me the go-ahead
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to not ask for permission
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but ask for forgiveness?
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Is it Ron?
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No, no.
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No. It's nobody.
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It's nobody, it's you.
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You have to be bold.
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Okay.
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Okay, look.
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You wanna get
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the pit filled in?
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Go rent a bulldozer
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and fill in the freaking pit.
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Hey.
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What's up?
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Say you had a friend
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who wanted to do
301
00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:10,920
something good,
302
00:07:10,990 --> 00:07:13,290
but a little risky,
303
00:07:10,990 --> 00:07:13,290
and she was kind
304
00:07:10,990 --> 00:07:13,290
of nervous about it,
305
00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:16,300
and this friend is me.
306
00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:16,300
What should I do?
307
00:07:17,100 --> 00:07:20,470
Mmm. You should do it,
308
00:07:17,100 --> 00:07:20,470
and you should ask
309
00:07:17,100 --> 00:07:20,470
your friend to help you,
310
00:07:20,540 --> 00:07:23,700
because your friend
311
00:07:20,540 --> 00:07:23,700
totally has your back.
312
00:07:20,540 --> 00:07:23,700
And that friend is me.
313
00:07:23,770 --> 00:07:24,760
You'll help me?
314
00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:27,470
Of course, I'll do
315
00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:27,470
anything I can to help.
316
00:07:27,540 --> 00:07:28,570
Let's do it.
317
00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:30,440
Okay.
318
00:07:30,910 --> 00:07:32,350
What are we doing?
319
00:07:30,910 --> 00:07:32,350
Is it dangerous?
320
00:07:33,110 --> 00:07:34,710
We're not gonna
321
00:07:33,110 --> 00:07:34,710
murder anyone.
322
00:07:37,620 --> 00:07:41,350
It was crazy.
323
00:07:37,620 --> 00:07:41,350
I didn't get a single permit.
324
00:07:37,620 --> 00:07:41,350
Nobody stamped anything.
325
00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:43,120
All I did was
326
00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:43,120
order a backhoe,
327
00:07:43,190 --> 00:07:44,820
and it came with
328
00:07:43,190 --> 00:07:44,820
a guy who runs it.
329
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:48,590
I've never
330
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:48,590
rented a guy before.
331
00:07:49,530 --> 00:07:51,160
I wish I knew
332
00:07:49,530 --> 00:07:51,160
about that during prom.
333
00:07:51,230 --> 00:07:53,460
There was a girl at my prom
334
00:07:51,230 --> 00:07:53,460
who was known
335
00:07:51,230 --> 00:07:53,460
as "the back ho."
336
00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:55,940
Mary Dunbar.
337
00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:55,940
She'd let anyone
338
00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:55,940
massage her back.
339
00:07:56,170 --> 00:07:57,830
I'm so excited
340
00:07:56,170 --> 00:07:57,830
we're doing this.
341
00:07:57,910 --> 00:07:59,370
And we're doing it
342
00:07:57,910 --> 00:07:59,370
without permission.
343
00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:01,410
We're giving
344
00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:01,410
ourselves permission.
345
00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:03,840
Look, I had these
346
00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:03,840
hard hats made.
347
00:08:03,910 --> 00:08:05,900
Check it out. Kick, Ass.
348
00:08:05,980 --> 00:08:07,450
I'll take that one.
349
00:08:05,980 --> 00:08:07,450
Okay.
350
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,810
Oh, my God, Ann,
351
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,810
this is so cool.
352
00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,110
Do you feel giddy?
353
00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,110
Yeah.
354
00:08:11,190 --> 00:08:12,780
I'm so proud of us.
355
00:08:12,850 --> 00:08:15,190
Miss Montague, you ready?
356
00:08:16,220 --> 00:08:18,820
I didn't wanna tell him
357
00:08:16,220 --> 00:08:18,820
my real name, you know?
358
00:08:18,890 --> 00:08:20,620
Yeah.
359
00:08:20,700 --> 00:08:23,820
First, speech.
360
00:08:20,700 --> 00:08:23,820
Is important moment here.
361
00:08:25,830 --> 00:08:29,740
We are about to
362
00:08:25,830 --> 00:08:29,740
fill this hole now,
363
00:08:25,830 --> 00:08:29,740
not with dirt,
364
00:08:30,610 --> 00:08:33,200
but with the courage
365
00:08:30,610 --> 00:08:33,200
of a thousand lions
366
00:08:33,270 --> 00:08:35,940
and the solemn memory
367
00:08:33,270 --> 00:08:35,940
of all of our friends
368
00:08:36,010 --> 00:08:38,640
who have fallen in
369
00:08:36,010 --> 00:08:38,640
this cursed hole.
370
00:08:40,450 --> 00:08:41,510
Dump it!
371
00:08:50,930 --> 00:08:52,950
Ugh! What the.
372
00:08:53,260 --> 00:08:54,320
Andy?
373
00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:56,190
I'm okay.
374
00:08:58,200 --> 00:08:59,500
Oh, God.
375
00:08:59,770 --> 00:09:00,790
Oh, my God.
376
00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:06,440
Oh!
377
00:09:06,710 --> 00:09:08,070
Well, that beeping
378
00:09:06,710 --> 00:09:08,070
was sure annoying.
379
00:09:08,140 --> 00:09:09,810
But this is even
380
00:09:08,140 --> 00:09:09,810
more annoying.
381
00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,280
I'll handle this.
382
00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:13,780
The monitor is
383
00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:13,780
not a toy, Andy.
384
00:09:13,850 --> 00:09:16,410
Anything is a toy
385
00:09:13,850 --> 00:09:16,410
if you play with it.
386
00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:18,180
I'll chalk that up
387
00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:18,180
to your concussion.
388
00:09:18,820 --> 00:09:21,520
The good news is
389
00:09:18,820 --> 00:09:21,520
your CAT scan's clear.
390
00:09:22,690 --> 00:09:25,520
Cool.
391
00:09:22,690 --> 00:09:25,520
Andy, I'm really
392
00:09:22,690 --> 00:09:25,520
happy you're okay.
393
00:09:25,590 --> 00:09:26,720
Leslie was worried, too.
394
00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:29,820
We should've checked before
395
00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:29,820
to see if you were home.
396
00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:31,670
Oh, no, I told you.
397
00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:31,670
I moved out of the pit.
398
00:09:31,730 --> 00:09:33,630
I just had to go back
399
00:09:31,730 --> 00:09:33,630
because I forgot
400
00:09:31,730 --> 00:09:33,630
my headphones.
401
00:09:33,700 --> 00:09:35,530
Then I laid down on
402
00:09:33,700 --> 00:09:35,530
this really comfy tarp,
403
00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:39,730
I saw an old cereal box
404
00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:39,730
I hadn't read before,
405
00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:39,730
so I must have drifted off.
406
00:09:39,810 --> 00:09:41,000
Next thing you know...
407
00:09:43,950 --> 00:09:45,070
Dirt.
408
00:09:45,780 --> 00:09:47,370
Scooch up for one sec.
409
00:09:48,620 --> 00:09:50,980
And back down.
410
00:09:48,620 --> 00:09:50,980
There you go.
411
00:09:51,050 --> 00:09:52,040
Ah!
412
00:09:52,350 --> 00:09:55,980
That is perfect.
413
00:09:52,350 --> 00:09:55,980
It's like
414
00:09:52,350 --> 00:09:55,980
I'm lying in a cloud.
415
00:09:56,660 --> 00:09:58,290
This is awesome.
416
00:09:58,990 --> 00:10:01,430
Ann and Andy,
417
00:09:58,990 --> 00:10:01,430
just like old times.
418
00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:06,860
The pit works
419
00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:06,860
in mysterious ways.
420
00:10:08,770 --> 00:10:12,210
I'm sorry about Andy,
421
00:10:08,770 --> 00:10:12,210
but I'm not sorry
422
00:10:08,770 --> 00:10:12,210
about what I did.
423
00:10:12,270 --> 00:10:14,900
What's my crime? I got bold?
424
00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:17,780
And a little negligent?
425
00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:17,780
Knope!
426
00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:20,400
My office! Now!
427
00:10:21,750 --> 00:10:23,950
Hey. Can I smoke in here?
428
00:10:24,020 --> 00:10:25,010
You don't smoke.
429
00:10:25,090 --> 00:10:26,150
Just asking if I can.
430
00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:28,620
Are you high?
431
00:10:28,690 --> 00:10:30,090
I'm high on kaboom.
432
00:10:30,660 --> 00:10:32,960
Don't ask for permission,
433
00:10:30,660 --> 00:10:32,960
ask for forgiveness.
434
00:10:33,030 --> 00:10:35,960
That's right.
435
00:10:33,030 --> 00:10:35,960
You never did ask me
436
00:10:33,030 --> 00:10:35,960
for permission, did you?
437
00:10:36,030 --> 00:10:38,190
Well, I'm sorry to
438
00:10:36,030 --> 00:10:38,190
burst your k-bubble,
439
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:42,500
but I just had my ass
440
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:42,500
k-handed to me
441
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:42,500
by the City Manager.
442
00:10:42,570 --> 00:10:44,660
And now this
443
00:10:42,570 --> 00:10:44,660
entire department
444
00:10:42,570 --> 00:10:44,660
is k-screwed.
445
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,980
Ron, I'm so, so, so sorry.
446
00:10:49,510 --> 00:10:51,980
What the K-
447
00:10:49,510 --> 00:10:51,980
were you thinking?
448
00:10:52,310 --> 00:10:55,370
I would prefer
449
00:10:52,310 --> 00:10:55,370
that she ask me
450
00:10:52,310 --> 00:10:55,370
for my permission
451
00:10:55,450 --> 00:10:56,880
so I can say no.
452
00:10:56,950 --> 00:10:58,610
I like saying no.
453
00:10:59,850 --> 00:11:01,980
It lowers their enthusiasm.
454
00:11:03,490 --> 00:11:06,260
Hello.
455
00:11:03,490 --> 00:11:06,260
So, I brought you
456
00:11:03,490 --> 00:11:06,260
some clean clothes
457
00:11:06,330 --> 00:11:07,490
that I found at my house.
458
00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:09,050
Oh, my God.
459
00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:09,050
My sexy sweater.
460
00:11:09,130 --> 00:11:11,660
It has a hole cut
461
00:11:09,130 --> 00:11:11,660
out over the bicep.
462
00:11:09,130 --> 00:11:11,660
Thank you.
463
00:11:11,730 --> 00:11:12,890
No problem.
464
00:11:12,970 --> 00:11:17,030
No, A-Cakes,
465
00:11:12,970 --> 00:11:17,030
seriously, thank you.
466
00:11:17,810 --> 00:11:18,860
You're welcome.
467
00:11:19,370 --> 00:11:21,570
No. Thank you.
468
00:11:22,780 --> 00:11:25,440
No, no, no, no, no.
469
00:11:22,780 --> 00:11:25,440
What... What are you...
470
00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:27,680
What do you think is
471
00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:27,680
happening right now?
472
00:11:27,750 --> 00:11:33,150
A tragic accident
473
00:11:27,750 --> 00:11:33,150
reignited feelings
474
00:11:27,750 --> 00:11:33,150
you thought were long dead,
475
00:11:33,220 --> 00:11:35,160
and we are finally
476
00:11:33,220 --> 00:11:35,160
back together.
477
00:11:35,220 --> 00:11:37,490
Andy, we're not
478
00:11:35,220 --> 00:11:37,490
back together.
479
00:11:38,290 --> 00:11:40,920
You know that
480
00:11:38,290 --> 00:11:40,920
I'm kind of with Mark now.
481
00:11:41,030 --> 00:11:43,290
Oh, God.
482
00:11:41,030 --> 00:11:43,290
Is that still happening?
483
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:46,560
I don't get it.
484
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:46,560
What does he have
485
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:46,560
that I don't have?
486
00:11:46,630 --> 00:11:47,690
Are you serious?
487
00:11:47,770 --> 00:11:48,760
Yeah.
488
00:11:48,840 --> 00:11:52,300
Everything.
489
00:11:48,840 --> 00:11:52,300
He has, literally,
490
00:11:48,840 --> 00:11:52,300
everything you don't have.
491
00:11:52,370 --> 00:11:56,970
A job, a car,
492
00:11:52,370 --> 00:11:56,970
a steady income,
493
00:11:52,370 --> 00:11:56,970
an address,
494
00:11:57,050 --> 00:11:59,840
a second pair of shoes,
495
00:11:57,050 --> 00:11:59,840
table manners,
496
00:11:59,910 --> 00:12:03,320
the ability to say
497
00:11:59,910 --> 00:12:03,320
"tampon" without giggling.
498
00:12:03,950 --> 00:12:06,580
Mark has his life together.
499
00:12:09,590 --> 00:12:11,920
I'll get you
500
00:12:09,590 --> 00:12:11,920
a different nurse.
501
00:12:14,700 --> 00:12:16,390
It's awful
502
00:12:14,700 --> 00:12:16,390
what happened to Andy.
503
00:12:16,460 --> 00:12:20,060
But sometimes
504
00:12:16,460 --> 00:12:20,060
when you make an omelet,
505
00:12:16,460 --> 00:12:20,060
you got to break a few eggs.
506
00:12:20,130 --> 00:12:22,870
What's the alternative?
507
00:12:20,130 --> 00:12:22,870
No omelets at all?
508
00:12:22,940 --> 00:12:25,170
Who wants to live
509
00:12:22,940 --> 00:12:25,170
in that kind of world?
510
00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:27,940
Maybe birds.
511
00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:27,940
Then all their
512
00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:27,940
babies would live.
513
00:12:28,010 --> 00:12:30,140
Miss Knope?
514
00:12:28,010 --> 00:12:30,140
Miss Knope.
515
00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:34,240
Hi. Scott Braddock,
516
00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:34,240
City Attorney.
517
00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:37,110
Hey, Scott. I didn't
518
00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:37,110
know that you were
519
00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:37,110
friends with Andy.
520
00:12:37,190 --> 00:12:38,380
I never met him.
521
00:12:38,450 --> 00:12:40,890
What I do know is that
522
00:12:38,450 --> 00:12:40,890
he could sue us at
523
00:12:38,450 --> 00:12:40,890
the drop of a hat.
524
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:43,930
I mean, right now,
525
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:43,930
he's the most
526
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:43,930
dangerous man in Pawnee.
527
00:12:43,990 --> 00:12:45,720
Is that all you
528
00:12:43,990 --> 00:12:45,720
lawyers think about?
529
00:12:45,790 --> 00:12:48,790
Lawsuits, and laws
530
00:12:45,790 --> 00:12:48,790
and legalese?
531
00:12:49,460 --> 00:12:51,330
Yes.
532
00:12:49,460 --> 00:12:51,330
Yeah. Well, you can relax.
533
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,870
All I'm gonna do
534
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,870
is go in and just say,
535
00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:56,340
"We are so sorry,
536
00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:56,340
it's entirely our fault..."
537
00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,400
No, no, no, no.
538
00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,400
You can't say
539
00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,400
any of that.
540
00:12:58,470 --> 00:13:01,770
It admits liability.
541
00:12:58,470 --> 00:13:01,770
You can't say "I'm sorry,"
542
00:12:58,470 --> 00:13:01,770
or "I apologize."
543
00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:03,180
It implies guilt.
544
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:06,650
That's insane.
545
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:06,650
I have to apologize.
546
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:06,650
Andy was a victim...
547
00:13:06,710 --> 00:13:08,840
Can't say "victim."
548
00:13:06,710 --> 00:13:08,840
...of an extremely
549
00:13:06,710 --> 00:13:08,840
unfortunate situation.
550
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:11,110
Can't say "unfortunate,"
551
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:11,110
and you can't
552
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:11,110
say "situation."
553
00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:12,650
I can't say
554
00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:12,650
the word "situation"?
555
00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:14,520
No. It implies
556
00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:14,520
there was a situation.
557
00:13:15,890 --> 00:13:17,830
Can I give him the pig?
558
00:13:18,060 --> 00:13:19,150
Yeah, the pig's fine.
559
00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:22,130
Hi, Andy.
560
00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:22,130
Hi, Leslie.
561
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,630
I got this for you.
562
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,630
Hope you squeal better.
563
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,630
Aw!
564
00:13:32,140 --> 00:13:34,470
This is my friend Scott.
565
00:13:34,540 --> 00:13:35,530
Hi, Scott.
566
00:13:35,740 --> 00:13:36,730
Mmm-hmm.
567
00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:39,680
Andy, I just wanted
568
00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:39,680
to say, I am so, so...
569
00:13:39,750 --> 00:13:40,980
Mmm-mmm,
570
00:13:39,750 --> 00:13:40,980
mmm-mmm, mmm.
571
00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:45,820
Filled with emotions,
572
00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:45,820
as any person would.
573
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:49,890
What?
574
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:51,020
No miming.
575
00:13:51,090 --> 00:13:52,080
Uh...
576
00:13:53,230 --> 00:13:54,590
You were in the pit.
577
00:13:54,660 --> 00:13:55,990
We're not
578
00:13:54,660 --> 00:13:55,990
conceding that point.
579
00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:58,460
You were in a place.
580
00:13:59,700 --> 00:14:00,930
We're both here now.
581
00:14:01,470 --> 00:14:04,300
The government...
582
00:14:01,470 --> 00:14:04,300
No, no. No.
583
00:14:04,370 --> 00:14:05,430
We got to go.
584
00:14:04,370 --> 00:14:05,430
What?
585
00:14:05,510 --> 00:14:06,500
Let's go.
586
00:14:05,510 --> 00:14:06,500
Why?
587
00:14:06,570 --> 00:14:08,670
Wendell Adams.
588
00:14:06,570 --> 00:14:08,670
I'm Andrew's attorney.
589
00:14:09,810 --> 00:14:10,870
Andy, no.
590
00:14:10,950 --> 00:14:11,940
It's my only option.
591
00:14:12,010 --> 00:14:13,500
Andy, stop.
592
00:14:13,580 --> 00:14:15,880
I've advised my client
593
00:14:13,580 --> 00:14:15,880
not to speak with you.
594
00:14:15,950 --> 00:14:18,180
He's suing
595
00:14:15,950 --> 00:14:18,180
the City of Pawnee.
596
00:14:18,250 --> 00:14:19,980
Andy, you're suing
597
00:14:18,250 --> 00:14:19,980
your hometown?
598
00:14:20,050 --> 00:14:21,720
Andy, no.
599
00:14:21,790 --> 00:14:22,950
Look, can we just
600
00:14:21,790 --> 00:14:22,950
talk about this?
601
00:14:23,020 --> 00:14:24,820
Leslie, no.
602
00:14:26,130 --> 00:14:27,120
This is terrible.
603
00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:28,320
Don't say "terrible."
604
00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:29,860
Don't look back.
605
00:14:36,240 --> 00:14:37,260
Hello?
606
00:14:37,340 --> 00:14:39,270
Andy, it's Leslie.
607
00:14:39,340 --> 00:14:40,330
Hello?
608
00:14:40,410 --> 00:14:42,170
Hello? Andy, it's Leslie.
609
00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:44,010
Psych. Leave a message
610
00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:44,010
after the beep.
611
00:14:45,180 --> 00:14:46,940
Andy, it's Leslie. Look.
612
00:14:47,010 --> 00:14:50,180
What did you mean
613
00:14:47,010 --> 00:14:50,180
when you said
614
00:14:47,010 --> 00:14:50,180
it's your only option?
615
00:14:50,250 --> 00:14:53,380
I think we should talk.
616
00:14:50,250 --> 00:14:53,380
Without lawyers present.
617
00:14:53,450 --> 00:14:56,390
If you wanna meet,
618
00:14:53,450 --> 00:14:56,390
just put a white chalk "X"
619
00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:59,620
on the mailbox
620
00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:59,620
across the street
621
00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:59,620
from City Hall.
622
00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,360
Or call me back.
623
00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,360
Just call me back.
624
00:15:02,530 --> 00:15:05,090
Andy, why aren't you
625
00:15:02,530 --> 00:15:05,090
returning my calls?
626
00:15:05,170 --> 00:15:07,660
Is it because of your lawyer?
627
00:15:05,170 --> 00:15:07,660
It's because of your lawyer.
628
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:12,570
Hey, Andy, it's your aunt,
629
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:12,570
your mom or dad's sister.
630
00:15:13,370 --> 00:15:18,440
I don't know how
631
00:15:13,370 --> 00:15:18,440
to tell you this
632
00:15:13,370 --> 00:15:18,440
but your uncle has passed.
633
00:15:19,410 --> 00:15:21,650
He's with Jesus now.
634
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:26,890
So we're having a memorial
635
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:26,890
in 30 minutes at City Hall.
636
00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:29,850
Hey! Free guitars
637
00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:29,850
at City Hall! Everybody run!
638
00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:33,520
Because of a local disaster,
639
00:15:33,590 --> 00:15:36,560
you, Andy Dwyer,
640
00:15:36,630 --> 00:15:42,230
must go to the evacuation
641
00:15:36,630 --> 00:15:42,230
center at Pawnee City Hall.
642
00:15:44,540 --> 00:15:45,840
Hmm.
643
00:15:45,910 --> 00:15:47,000
That was weird.
644
00:15:47,070 --> 00:15:49,270
How long
645
00:15:47,070 --> 00:15:49,270
have you been there?
646
00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:54,280
I promise
647
00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:54,280
that Andy isn't suing
648
00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:54,280
just for the money.
649
00:15:54,350 --> 00:15:56,370
Leslie, the man
650
00:15:54,350 --> 00:15:56,370
lived in a pit. Okay?
651
00:15:56,450 --> 00:15:58,680
He couldn't find
652
00:15:56,450 --> 00:15:58,680
a place to live
653
00:15:56,450 --> 00:15:58,680
on the Earth's surface,
654
00:15:58,750 --> 00:16:00,150
so he went under the ground.
655
00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:03,120
You're dealing
656
00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:03,120
with a grown man
657
00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:03,120
who thinks like a gopher.
658
00:16:03,190 --> 00:16:07,030
I feel like if I could get
659
00:16:03,190 --> 00:16:07,030
past the lawyers and find
660
00:16:03,190 --> 00:16:07,030
out what's really going on,
661
00:16:07,090 --> 00:16:08,860
I think I could get
662
00:16:07,090 --> 00:16:08,860
him to drop the lawsuit.
663
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:18,030
ANDY OVER PHONE:
664
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:18,030
Ann, is that you?
665
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:18,030
Hey.
666
00:16:18,110 --> 00:16:19,970
We need to talk
667
00:16:18,110 --> 00:16:19,970
somewhere private.
668
00:16:22,040 --> 00:16:23,100
Oh!
669
00:16:23,180 --> 00:16:25,040
Baby, I'm back.
670
00:16:25,110 --> 00:16:26,140
Thank you so...
671
00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:28,980
Why are you naked?
672
00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:28,980
Oh!
673
00:16:29,050 --> 00:16:30,310
Well, because of
674
00:16:29,050 --> 00:16:30,310
what you said.
675
00:16:30,380 --> 00:16:32,180
We're getting back together.
676
00:16:30,380 --> 00:16:32,180
No, we're not.
677
00:16:32,250 --> 00:16:33,480
Yes, we are.
678
00:16:33,550 --> 00:16:35,490
You should've heard
679
00:16:33,550 --> 00:16:35,490
the super sexy stuff
680
00:16:33,550 --> 00:16:35,490
she was saying to me.
681
00:16:35,560 --> 00:16:38,080
I said, "Hey, Andy. It's Ann.
682
00:16:35,560 --> 00:16:38,080
Can we talk at my house?"
683
00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:39,560
That's not how you said it.
684
00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:39,560
You were like,
685
00:16:39,630 --> 00:16:43,890
"Hey, Andy. It's Ann.
686
00:16:39,630 --> 00:16:43,890
Can you talk at my house?"
687
00:16:43,970 --> 00:16:46,760
Oh, my God, you are
688
00:16:43,970 --> 00:16:46,760
such a baby. Ugh! Literally.
689
00:16:46,830 --> 00:16:49,330
Big, naked baby.
690
00:16:46,830 --> 00:16:49,330
Put clothes on.
691
00:16:50,370 --> 00:16:52,770
You know what?
692
00:16:50,370 --> 00:16:52,770
I should have
693
00:16:50,370 --> 00:16:52,770
seen this coming.
694
00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:54,270
Has he showed
695
00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:54,270
up naked before?
696
00:16:54,340 --> 00:16:58,800
Oh, yeah. Anniversaries,
697
00:16:54,340 --> 00:16:58,800
birthdays, holidays.
698
00:16:54,340 --> 00:16:58,800
Good luck.
699
00:16:59,510 --> 00:17:01,450
Where are you...
700
00:16:59,510 --> 00:17:01,450
Hey, Ann. Just...
701
00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:05,750
None of your clothes fit me.
702
00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:05,750
So I'm putting an apron
703
00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:05,750
over the front stuff.
704
00:17:05,820 --> 00:17:07,150
Is she gone?
705
00:17:09,190 --> 00:17:11,680
What did you mean
706
00:17:09,190 --> 00:17:11,680
when you said this
707
00:17:09,190 --> 00:17:11,680
was your only option?
708
00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:13,820
Well, I'm completely broke,
709
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:16,730
and my lawyer said
710
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:16,730
it could be worth
711
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:16,730
upwards of $100,000.
712
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:19,330
I just can't believe
713
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:19,330
that you're suing
714
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:19,330
just for the money.
715
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,600
I want Ann back, and she
716
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,600
said she really needs
717
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,600
a guy with a lot of money.
718
00:17:22,670 --> 00:17:23,730
That doesn't sound like Ann.
719
00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:25,240
Well, I can't
720
00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:25,240
really do her voice,
721
00:17:25,310 --> 00:17:28,400
but she said she likes Mark
722
00:17:25,310 --> 00:17:28,400
because he's a grown-up
723
00:17:25,310 --> 00:17:28,400
with a bank account.
724
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:32,070
I put two and two together.
725
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:32,070
$100,000, I could probably
726
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:32,070
get a bank account.
727
00:17:32,150 --> 00:17:35,640
Sometimes, I think
728
00:17:32,150 --> 00:17:35,640
the right thing to do
729
00:17:32,150 --> 00:17:35,640
is to not take shortcuts.
730
00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:39,310
I mean, look,
731
00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:39,310
I tried to fill in the pit,
732
00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:39,310
that didn't work either.
733
00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:43,960
Fine. I'll get a job.
734
00:17:44,390 --> 00:17:45,690
Ann will respect that.
735
00:17:46,690 --> 00:17:49,690
I can make six bucks a day
736
00:17:46,690 --> 00:17:49,690
playing guitar on the street.
737
00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:50,750
I can't make
738
00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:50,750
six bucks a day.
739
00:17:50,830 --> 00:17:52,030
Wait a second.
740
00:17:52,100 --> 00:17:55,090
I know I just said that
741
00:17:52,100 --> 00:17:55,090
maybe shortcuts are bad,
742
00:17:55,170 --> 00:17:58,330
but I kind of just thought
743
00:17:55,170 --> 00:17:58,330
of an awesome shortcut.
744
00:17:59,110 --> 00:18:01,740
Mr. Dwyer, we're very happy
745
00:17:59,110 --> 00:18:01,740
that you're dropping the suit.
746
00:18:01,810 --> 00:18:03,370
Yeah, it's really terrific.
747
00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:05,410
I have my conditions.
748
00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:05,410
No. Never.
749
00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:07,510
I will not negotiate
750
00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:07,510
with greedy street people.
751
00:18:07,580 --> 00:18:09,880
Wait, Leslie.
752
00:18:07,580 --> 00:18:09,880
Let's hear him out.
753
00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:11,940
We planned this.
754
00:18:12,650 --> 00:18:13,950
Kaboom.
755
00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:16,750
All right.
756
00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:16,750
What's it gonna take?
757
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:21,850
One, I want that
758
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:21,850
pit filled in, sir.
759
00:18:27,900 --> 00:18:28,930
Is there a two?
760
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:32,740
A guaranteed starting spot
761
00:18:33,570 --> 00:18:37,480
in the Indianapolis Colts,
762
00:18:33,570 --> 00:18:37,480
inside linebacker.
763
00:18:38,950 --> 00:18:40,540
Well, we can't
764
00:18:38,950 --> 00:18:40,540
accomplish that.
765
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:46,080
I think that Andy
766
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:46,080
seems like he doesn't care
767
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:46,080
so much about the second one,
768
00:18:47,020 --> 00:18:51,580
and he would be fine
769
00:18:47,020 --> 00:18:51,580
with us just
770
00:18:47,020 --> 00:18:51,580
filling in the pit.
771
00:18:51,660 --> 00:18:53,560
What do you say, Scott?
772
00:18:54,230 --> 00:18:56,860
Yeah. I mean, eventually,
773
00:18:54,230 --> 00:18:56,860
we're gonna fill in the pit.
774
00:18:56,930 --> 00:18:58,660
"Eventually"?
775
00:18:59,730 --> 00:19:01,730
I've already been injured
776
00:18:59,730 --> 00:19:01,730
in that thing twice.
777
00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:05,200
And I could fall
778
00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:05,200
in 10 more times
779
00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:05,200
by "eventually."
780
00:19:05,270 --> 00:19:06,600
Every time I walk
781
00:19:05,270 --> 00:19:06,600
past that pit,
782
00:19:06,670 --> 00:19:10,630
I'm forced to relive
783
00:19:06,670 --> 00:19:10,630
the most traumatic
784
00:19:06,670 --> 00:19:10,630
two separate days of my life,
785
00:19:10,710 --> 00:19:12,440
and wanna sue you again.
786
00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:16,580
Well, I hate to say it,
787
00:19:16,650 --> 00:19:21,020
but it really seems
788
00:19:16,650 --> 00:19:21,020
like Andy has us over
789
00:19:16,650 --> 00:19:21,020
a barrel here, Scott.
790
00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:23,180
Yeah.
791
00:19:24,790 --> 00:19:27,920
This is really happening.
792
00:19:24,790 --> 00:19:27,920
I just can't believe it.
793
00:19:29,460 --> 00:19:33,130
Oh, sorry. Usually,
794
00:19:29,460 --> 00:19:33,130
in these situations,
795
00:19:29,460 --> 00:19:33,130
a person says "pinch me."
796
00:19:36,700 --> 00:19:37,830
Is that Andy?
797
00:19:39,910 --> 00:19:44,170
Ah, yeah.
798
00:19:39,910 --> 00:19:44,170
Just one of his conditions
799
00:19:39,910 --> 00:19:44,170
for the settlement, I guess.
800
00:19:44,610 --> 00:19:46,100
He settled?
801
00:19:44,610 --> 00:19:46,100
Yup.
802
00:19:47,380 --> 00:19:51,220
Gave up $100,000 probably
803
00:19:47,380 --> 00:19:51,220
just for one thing,
804
00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:54,550
the city fill in the pit
805
00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:54,550
behind your house.
806
00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:55,950
Why?
807
00:19:56,590 --> 00:19:57,820
Who knows?
808
00:19:58,290 --> 00:20:00,820
Who knows why
809
00:19:58,290 --> 00:20:00,820
that gopher
810
00:19:58,290 --> 00:20:00,820
does what he does?
811
00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:02,990
You always hated this pit!
812
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,800
Goodbye, pit.
813
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,800
Hello, lot.
814
00:20:12,040 --> 00:20:14,170
How does taking
815
00:20:12,040 --> 00:20:14,170
risks make me feel?
816
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:16,780
Amazing.
817
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:21,610
Tingling sensation
818
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:21,610
throughout my whole body.
819
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:21,610
I feel flushed.
820
00:20:22,650 --> 00:20:27,680
My muscles are relaxed,
821
00:20:22,650 --> 00:20:27,680
yet I feel awake.
822
00:20:22,650 --> 00:20:27,680
Just waves of pleasure.
823
00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:33,080
I wish there was something
824
00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:33,080
physical that could
825
00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:33,080
make me feel this way.
826
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,660
Wow, you did it.
827
00:20:38,430 --> 00:20:40,230
Are you thinking
828
00:20:38,430 --> 00:20:40,230
what I'm thinking?
829
00:20:40,300 --> 00:20:42,740
There's so much
830
00:20:40,300 --> 00:20:42,740
more to do.
831
00:20:40,300 --> 00:20:42,740
Oh, my God, we're so close.
832
00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:43,900
Yeah.
833
00:20:43,970 --> 00:20:46,770
I'm gonna call Kaboom,
834
00:20:43,970 --> 00:20:46,770
and check on their
835
00:20:43,970 --> 00:20:46,770
availability for next year.
836
00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:48,100
Great.
837
00:20:49,340 --> 00:20:50,330
Information.
838
00:20:50,410 --> 00:20:52,540
Hi, yes, I'd like
839
00:20:50,410 --> 00:20:52,540
the number for Kaboom,
840
00:20:52,610 --> 00:20:54,710
the national playground
841
00:20:52,610 --> 00:20:54,710
building charity.
842
00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:57,180
I hope they can work us in.
843
00:20:57,250 --> 00:20:59,310
Sorry, there's no
844
00:20:57,250 --> 00:20:59,310
listing for that name.
845
00:20:59,390 --> 00:21:00,880
What? Are you sure?
846
00:21:02,220 --> 00:21:05,020
"Kaboom" is a word I made up.
847
00:21:02,220 --> 00:21:05,020
It's not in any dictionary.
848
00:21:05,090 --> 00:21:06,960
I trick people into
849
00:21:05,090 --> 00:21:06,960
building playgrounds
850
00:21:07,030 --> 00:21:09,020
on empty lots
851
00:21:07,030 --> 00:21:09,020
in their neighborhoods.
852
00:21:09,100 --> 00:21:11,590
It's an elaborate prank.
853
00:21:09,100 --> 00:21:11,590
For my next prank,
854
00:21:11,670 --> 00:21:14,900
I'm going to build a hospital
855
00:21:11,670 --> 00:21:14,900
in a poor part of China.
856
00:21:14,970 --> 00:21:16,530
They'll never see it coming.
46185
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