All language subtitles for The.nanny.S05E19.DVDRip.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

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( Sniffs )

Niles, what is that sickeningly
sweet overpowering smell?

The cologne you gave me
for my birthday.

Don't you just love it?
What's it called again?

Tester.

Say, wait a minute,

cologne, what's that,
new oven mitts?

And...

you're wearing a girdle?

Miss Babcock is coming home
from the sanitarium.

It has nothing to do with her. I'm
wearing it because I pulled my back.

Oh, yeah, sure, and I wear a Wonderbra
'cause I sprained my breasts.

- Oh, hi, darling.
- Darling.

Oh, what have we here? The
proposal from the wedding planner?

Ah, yeah.

Is the caterer going to be charging
us by the person or by the couple?

After all the samples
that me and ma consumed,

the caterers decided
to charge my side of the family

per person as a couple.

Well, that's outrageous.

The bartender's doing the same
thing with your side.

You don't really have to use this guy. I
mean, I could plan this wedding myself.

Oh, no, no, no.
We want it to be nice.

I mean, you know, fancy, classy.

Um, when do they need
the deposit?

You don't think that
I can make a nice affair?

Listen, I know how it's done.
You just need a very good theme.

Something
that's elegant and understated.

Starlight Express, do you skate?

Fran, it's not that
the Duchess of Kent

wouldn't love to arrive
at the dais on rollerblades,

but you're my princess.

I want this to be
the wedding of your dreams.

But this is the wedding
of my dreams.

Sir, it's your brother
with some urgent news.

Oh, yes, Nigel, what is it?

Oh, my God, I see. Yes, well,
thank you for calling. Goodbye.

What?

That was Nigel. Last night
my father passed away.

Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.

Hello, hello! I'm back!

What's with the sourpusses?
Who died?

♪ She was working in a bridal
shop in Flushing, Queens ♪

♪ Till her boyfriend kicked her out
in one of those crushing scenes ♪

♪ What was she to do, where was she
to go, she was out on her fanny ♪

♪ So over the bridge from Flushing
to the Sheffield's door ♪

♪ She was there to sell make up
but the father saw more ♪

♪ She had style, she had flair, she was
there, that's how she became the Nanny ♪

♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl we described ♪

♪ Was just exactly
what the doctor prescribed? ♪

♪ Now, the father
finds her beguiling ♪

♪ Watch out, C.C. ♪

♪ And the kids are actually
smiling such joie de vivre ♪

♪ She's the lady in red when
everybody else is wearing tan ♪

♪ The flashy girl from Flushing,
the Nanny named Fran ♪

Let's have the Sheffields
in here, please.

Mr. Chandler, hello.

Sit here.

I'm just so embarrassed.

I mean,
I mean, I hardly know grandpa,

but I felt close to him after
all those heartfelt cards

his secretary wrote
us on our birthdays.

She never forgot.

Oh, honey, just let it out.

But at least you know
what happened to your grandpa.

Mine stepped into a magician's
box in The Catskills

and was never seen again.

Many years later, someone spotted
him with a magician's assistant

in Miami, but nothing
was ever proven.

Please, be seated.

First of all, let me say how
sorry I am for your loss.

( Cries )

Oh, Mags, it's okay.

I cry like a baby too when I realize
how much money we're going to inherit.

Brighton, please.

Not everything is just
about money, you know.

Really, Brighton, have
a little more sensitivity.

It happens to be very traumatic
when a man loses his father.

He's no longer the son
looking up to somebody.

He's now the one next
in line to die.

It's lonely, it's aging.

Thanks, dear.

Lean on me, baby.

Anyway, getting down to business.
Your father left you all...

What? The racehorses? The Ferrari?
The country house in Tuscany?

A videotape.

Damn.

Brighton, please, your
grandfather may have been cold,

selfish and detached, but
to me he will always be "sir."

In any case,
Mr. Sheffield Senior

made this tape to convey

his plans regarding his estate.

I can never get
this thing to work.

Oh, give me that.

Channel 3, video 1,
extended play,

go, go, go.

To my three children

who have enjoyed all the
privileges of the Sheffield name

and upbringing

I leave my sincere wishes

for a long and happy life

and a few little trinkets
for the grandchildren.

Please, tell me
the racehorse's name is Trinket.

Yes, and what about
the bulk of his estate?

You may be wondering what the plans
are for the bulk of my estate.

Yes!

Well, let me explain.

Too bad you couldn't communicate
like this when he was alive.

There is a woman who was never
able to enjoy the privileges

that come along
with being a Sheffield.

My fourth child.

Concepción.

Where did this
fourth child come from?

Well, I guess Concepción
wasn't immaculate.

To her,
I leave my entire estate.

Well, that's it then.

Good luck.

Goodbye.

Ta-ta.

I can't believe this.

Send her in, please.

Hola.

I'm Maria de la Concepción
Bustillo García Del Amo.

Sheffield.

It is your father's wish that
his estate in the amount

of $100 million goes to her.

Auntie Concepción!

Brighton,
would you knock it off?

Look, my father was such
a philanderer he'd believe

anyone who claimed
to be his child.

What proof do we have
this woman and I are related?

Let's get to know her
a little bit.

Hi, honey, are you married?

Well, I was living with a man

for five years, but I couldn't
make a commitment...

Well, there's your DNA test.

Oh, I cannot believe how many
people showed up for that memorial.

My tongue is so dry from putting stamps
on all these "thank you" notices.

Are you sure I wasn't
mentioned in the will?

He always said I was
like a son to him.

You were, you got bupkis, too.

I'm supposed to be jumping
up and down because

grandpa left me a
cracked porcelain doll?

I mean, you could buy a car with
how much that stamp collection

you inherited is worth.

( laughter )

You know, most people
don't have what we have.

Maybe this'll
give you the opportunity

to understand something beyond
your privileged existence.

You do know that if dad hasn't
socked anything away

he's going to have to dip
into your trust fund.

He can do that?

You know
I don't believe you, kids.

You just lost your grandfather,

you just found out that you have
a new member of the family

and all you three are
focused on is the money.

I'm very disappointed in you and
you should go up to your rooms

and really think about this.

I'm sorry, Fran.

Well, Brighton brought it up.

She's always been poor.
What's it to her?

Can you believe those kids?

Making something out of nothing?

They're making something
out of nothing, aren't they?

Whew!

After not having been
in my apartment for three months

I really had to air it out. It
smelled like a cat died in there.

( Gasps )

- You have a dog.
- Oh.

( Gasps )

We're taking care of him.

Perhaps what you smelled in your apartment
was the stench of your decaying youth.

You know, Niles, I learned
something at the... place.

If 220 bolts of electricity
can't hurt me,

300 pounds of Butler sure can't.

Are you happy to have
your little friend home?

It's all right.

So isn't it a pity that Maxwell's
father left all his money to a trollop?

Oh, he left something for me?

Oh, you meant her.

So, nanny Fine what are you gonna
do now that the wedding's off?

Who said anything about
the wedding being off?

Nanny Fine,

without his inheritance, Maxwell
will run out of money like that.

It takes a lot of money
to keep you looking that cheap.

Well, for your information
it would not matter to me

if Maxwell were
completely broke,

because I am not in it
for the money.

I'm in it for love.

Well, isn't that sweet?

We'll see if
you feel the same way

when Maxwell has to move in
with you and your mother.

Think about it, Nanny Fine.

( laughs )

( belches )

Hi, honey.

Bad news. The doctor says
I gotta quit the paper route.

I'm getting too big
for the bike.

Darling, come here and let
daddy give you some sugar.

( Belches )

Oh, look, here, I was looking
through the want-ads.

I thought I'd circle a few
things you're qualified to do.

But there's nothing
circled here, my pet.

No kidding.

Oh, no. This is ridiculous.
We're overreacting.

I mean, a smart man like Mr. Sheffield
isn't going to burn through his own money

because he knows he's got
his father's 100 mil coming.

We would, but he wouldn't.

Oh, I'm sure you're right.
There's nothing to worry about.

If Maxwell were seriously
counting on his inheritance,

he'd be rushing off to London
to contest the will.

Just off to London on the Concorde.
Nothing to worry about.

Uh-oh.

I must say, so far I am enjoying

my return to sanity very much.

I can't believe this is
happening. I love this house.

We'll get used to it, Ma, because we're
one step away from the poor house.

I hate the poor house!

Look, we're just gonna have to
learn to economize that's all.

I mean, the kids'll get used
to wearing hand me downs.

Maggie'll give her skirts
to Gracie, Gracie'll

give her skirts to me.

What are you nuts? What is the
one thing that I taught you?

Death begins in the colon?

That and don't give up
without a fight.

Go and get that inheritance
back from Concepción.

Why should she wind up
with our money?

She's not even
a real Sheffield like us.

Ma, we're just gonna have to learn
to save, like normal people.

Beginning with why is Mr. Sheffield
paying for this wedding?

Isn't it traditional for the
bride's parents to pay for it?

Haven't you guys been
saving for years?

Well, we were
but when you turned 30...

we thought it was safe
to spend it on a Buick.

Oh, Ma, I'm just so worried
about the Sheffields.

I mean, they're used to the finer
things in life. They're not like me.

I know what it's like
to scram, struggle,

go hungry.

You better march
your tuches right down

to that gold digger's hotel

and protect your family
from losing all of this.

I know. Max and the kids
mean everything to me.

What Max? I'm talking
about me and daddy!

- Francesca.
- Hola.

What a surprise.

I love what you're wearing.
You've got such great taste.

Ma, I want you to meet
Concepción.

And this is my mother.

Consuela.

Sylvia.

- That's how I want my hair.
- That's how I want my hair.

Consuela, you really had a pretty hot
affair with Maxwell's father, huh?

Yes, I was a flamenco dancer.

Oh.

So why did you stop?

Who says I stopped?

Fran, come sit down, Fran.
So what can I do for you?

Look, let's not beat
around the bush.

Where is the room service menu?

Here it is.

Okay.

It's so hard for me to accept
that this is all mine.

But I guess I'll have to adapt.

( laughs )

You know, Concepción,
me and your brother are

going to be marrying
in less than a month,

and if you and your mother
are still in town,

I'd just love you to come and pay
for the wedding. Did I say that?

We'd love to come.

Oh, good.

Oh, this platter looks
like it's enough for us.

No, no, it says,
"Served from 8:00 to 11:00."

Hmm.

Well, that's no good.

Let me offer you something
to drink.

Okay.

You know, Connie, just
a little hypothetical here:

what if like uh, you had
all of my money,

what would be a tactful way
for me to ask for it back

and still come out
smelling like a rose?

Ah, you're so funny, chica.

( laughs )

Chica, that's me.

Oh, you and I are gonna be
good friends.

Oh, good.

- Friend.
- Yes.

You know, my whole life I felt
I was nothing

and that my father
was ashamed of me.

But him leaving me all this money
proves that I lived in his heart.

Oh, oy.

You're so lucky.

You have a home, beautiful
children, and a man who loves you.

Double oy.

You know, Niles,
when I was away at...

the place.

It was really scary, because when I was all
doped up, I get on hearing these voices:

Maxwell loves Fran,
you are alone and old...

You have to wear a straitjacket to
feel a man's arms around you...

It was you?

You did come and visit me,
you old softie!

Oh, God, all is right with the world.
Maxwell's father is dead,

he left Maxwell broke, and in
desperate need of a rich wife.

Oh, welcome home, sir.

Oh, is it hot in here?

Oh, welcome home, Maxwell.

How's the family, sir?

Well, they're dealing with
it as best they can, Niles.

Nigel wanted to contest the will, but the
lawyers seem to think it's ironclad.

Oh, that is despicable.

Maxwell, let me put
this delicately.

I have 20 mil, I'll buy
my own ring, I have no pride.

Oh, I've missed
that sense of humor, C.C.

( laughs )

( sighs )

Oh, hi, honey, I'm so glad
you're home, I missed you.

- I missed you too.
- How'd it go?

Well, the will is incontestable
I'm afraid, but oh, Niles,

there's a list here of things
from my father's estate

that have to go to Concepción. Just a few
dusty old antiquities we can live without.

Oh, sir, this just isn't fair.
Miss Babcock's not on the list.

Honey, I want to talk to you,
I've given this a lot of thought.

And you know, I have been poor,
and I can be poor again.

But you don't know what it is to be broke
and you've got the kids to think about...

Fran, what are you saying?

Well, I'm saying that

if you need to marry a woman with
money to preserve your lifestyle,

I will understand and I'll let
you out of your commitment.

It's just as easy to marry a rich
girl as it is to marry a poor one.

That's an interesting saying,
I've not heard that one before.

Me and my big mouth.

Are you sure you
don't want to reconsider?

It is just as easy to marry a rich
man as it is to marry a poor one.

Actually, it's not.

Fran, I'm not broke.
Far from it,

I'm a very successful
Broadway producer.

Sometimes I'm a very
successful producer.

I have had a hit on occasion.

Oh, come on, look, they're
not taking everything.

Oh, honey, tell me the truth.
You can be honest with me.

We are not going to starve.

Unless your mother
moves in with us.

No, look,
we're not down and out yet.

Don't you worry. I've still got
a few things up my sleeve.

Your watch, sir.

Oh, sweetie. Don't worry
about it, I'll replace it.

Wholesale from Avenue K,

which incidentally is going to be the
first letter of your new Cartier.

That is so sweet of you.

Honey, you know, I was
trying to help you

today, and I went over
to the Waldorf Towers.

Oh, no, oh, Fran, dear God, you didn't
go traipsing over to see Concepción

to try to talk her into giving back the
money against my father's dying wishes.

What did she say?

I couldn't ask her for it.

Sweetie, I just felt
so sorry for her.

I mean, she's got all
that money, but I've got you.

Darling,

do you know what worried me most about
my father dying and leaving me nothing?

The leaving you nothing part?

No.

The thought of I losing you.

I mean, you know, I'm not the man I
was when I proposed to you, Fran.

( Chuckles )

Wait a minute, we are still
talking about the money.

There wasn't like
an accident or anything.

No, no, it's just the money.

Oh, sweetie, I love you so much
for richer or for poorer,

which I'm hoping is
at least a split-level

in Long Island.

Darling, it won't have
to come to that.

I want you to have
the house of your dreams.

That...

That is the house of my dreams.

( Doorbell rings )

Niles.

Chandler, what on Earth
are you doing here?

I have just come from
a meeting with Concepción

who has decided to share her
inheritance with her new siblings.

What? I don't understand I thought you said
you didn't ask her for the money back.

I didn't, I just welcomed
her into the family.

Which is all she ever
really wanted.

Oh.

Baby, you're the greatest.

You know, Miss Babcock,

with Mr. Sheffield
and Miss Fine doing so well,

no one would fault you if you went
back to the asylum for a little jolt.

Actually, Niles, I think
I am handling it very well.

What?

I'm just responding
to what you said.

I didn't say a word.

What do you mean
you didn't say anything?

I distinctly heard you say
something about the asylum.

Are you insinuating that
I am in some way...

Wasn't Niles just here?

I didn't see him.

Tell your father that
I'll be back in a few weeks.

( Jazz music playing )