All language subtitles for The.nanny.S05E18.DVDRip.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

Well, in just seven weeks

this is going to be our room.

Ooh.

- Our bed...
- Ooh...

- Our chair.
- Ooh...

- Our lamp.
- Ooh...

And my closet.

Ooh...

Ooh. And who said size
isn't important in the bedroom?

( laughter )

Now, this is what I picked out for Maxwell
to wear to my High School reunion party.

It's like having a great
big Ken doll.

Only mine is anatomically
correct, please, God.

Meanwhile, this is the first
time you've got a reason

to go to your reunion.

You should be more concerned
with what you're gonna wear.

You know I just thought I'd wear a
simple drop dead gorgeous fiancee

and accessorize it with this.

You know, I can't wait to see
Naomi Dembo's face

when you walk in.

She was so mean to us in high school. She
told everyone that we were lesbian lovers.

Yeah, but you know it
backfired on her, because

we were never so
popular with the boys.

( laughter )

( humming )

( screaming )

Alright, hands up anyone
who doesn't belong in here.

I bet you weren't expecting three
gorgeous girls in your bed.

( laughter )

Now, don't go getting any ideas.

( laughter )

Yes, well, I think this has sufficiently
put that fancy to rest, Sylvia.

I'm sorry, honey,
I just wanted to show the girls

what you're wearing to my High
School Reunion Saturday night.

Uh, Saturday night? I thought
you said it was next Saturday.

Well, it was next Saturday when I
told you about it last Saturday.

Well, this Saturday I
have to fly to Washington

to talk at the National
Endowment For the Arts.

Oh, no, you have to come.

The last two reunions I
carried a man's coat

and said my fiancee
was in the bathroom.

I don't think that
they'll go for it a third time.

( laughter )

What do you want me to do? Cancel on
the President of the United States?

Well, he's been known to put
pleasure before business.

Why can't you?

♪ She was working in a bridal
shop in Flushing, Queens ♪

♪ 'Til her boyfriend kicked her out
in one of those crushing scenes ♪

♪ What was she to do, where was she
to go, she was out on her fanny ♪

♪ So over the bridge from Flushing
to the Sheffield's door ♪

♪ She was there to sell make up
but the father saw more ♪

♪ She had style, she had flair, she was
there, that's how she became the Nanny ♪

♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl we described ♪

♪ Was just exactly
what the doctor prescribed? ♪

♪ Now, the father
finds her beguiling ♪

♪ Watch out, C.C. ♪

♪ And the kids are actually
smiling such joie de vivre ♪

♪ She's the lady in red when
everybody else is wearing tan ♪

♪ The flashy girl from Flushing,
the Nanny named Fran ♪

( laughter )

Oh, Val, I cannot believe
how our entire graduating class

has aged.
Everybody looks so old.

Yeah.

You want to sign the guestbook?

Oh, no, I'll tell you my joints
are all stiff from the dampness.

( laughter )

Well, you know what, let's hit the
buffet and see what they got.

Alright, you know what,
let's load up on the finger food

because I want it
to look really organic

when I flash my new ring onto
Naomi Dembo's new nose.

Excuse me, could you
pass me a quiche?

( Applause )

Oh, Ray Barone, thank you.

Oh, you brought your fiancee,

- Maxwell.
- Mm.

Nice to see you again, buddy.

Oh, hello, Ray. Fran's not making
up ridiculous excuses anymore.

Her fiancee had to go
to Washington

to talk to the president.

Mm.

( laughter )

He's in the bathroom.

Okay.

You know, Raymond,
in High School

I had such a crush on you.

Well, who didn't?
Everybody Loved Raymond!

( laughter )

You know, Ray, I understand
congratulations are in order.

I read in a newsletter you just had twins.
That must be fabulous.

Yeah, I have a five year old
and twin two-year-old boys.

So you know I don't care
how this reunion goes,

I'm just happy to be
out of the house right now.

That was always you, Ray,
funny and fertile.

( laughter )

Oh, thank you. We just got
a deal on our house too.

No one wanted to live there
'cause of the noise factor.

Why, are you near
the airport or something?

No, no, across the street
from my parents.

( laughter )

Oh, boy, Ray, I think you'd
better back get to your table.

It looks like your wife
is getting a little annoyed

that you're talking so long
to the two of us.

Oh, no, it's 'cause
this is her plate.

Bye, Ray!

( laughter )

Franny, Naomi Dembo, 11 o'clock.

Where?

That's 1 o'clock, Val.

( laughter )

- Fran, it's me, Naomi!
- Hi, Naomi!

How are you? You look fabulous!

I know.

( laughter )

You two, you look stunning,
your hair, your outfits.

You see, you wait long enough,
everything comes back again.

Well, let's hope the same
doesn't apply to your schnoz.

Just like old times.

Come sit at my table. Gayle,
Ivy, Dolores, they're all here.

They hated us.

I know. Come sit.

( laughter )

Look who it is.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- Hi.
- Hi.

( All speaking together )

Oh, Dottie, tell me,
how is that husband

of yours,
Mr. Park Avenue Doctor?

Oh, well, the older we got,
the less we found we had common.

Yeah. He liked to sleep with
18-year-olds and I wasn't one.

( Gasping )

- How awful.
- You're divorced?

Honey, we all are.

But you all seemed
so happy at the last reunion.

You were flashing your wedding pictures
and showing off your engagement rings,

which, if you ask me,
I thought was very obnoxious.

Franny, you're happy for two minutes
and then everything's an argument.

I think it's cold,
he thinks it's hot.

I like Letterman, he likes Leno.

I dislike his friends. He thinks all
mine are shrill, foul-mouthed boozers.

He could bite me.

( laughter )

Franny, you were the smart one.

Marriage is the surest way
to ruin any relationship.

( Sighs )

So what's new with you?

I'm engaged.

( laughter )

Oh.

You know, Niles, ever since those
men came to take Miss Babcock away.

Ho ho hee hee ha ha.

You've been acting kind of strange. I mean,
why don't you just admit you miss her?

Because I don't miss her.

Oh, really?

Explain tonight's dessert.

( laughter )

Oh, what a pity. All my years
of torment and torture

have put her where she is today.

There's not a moment that goes
by that I don't blame myself.

But Niles, it was Dad's and Fran's
engagement that sent her over the edge.

That's what I think,
but I didn't want to say.

( laughter )

You wanna piece of chin?
She's got three.

( laughter )

I'm just gonna pass.

Okay. Home, sweet home.
Come on in.

So tell me, Mary Ann,
what does your daddy do?

He's chairman and CEO
of Amcom International.

What does your father do?

Eats pudding.

Is anyone hungry? I'll cut you
a slab of Miss Babcock.

Nah.

Isn't Fran cool? I can't wait
till her and my dad get married.

Ever since my dad married my
stepmother, I became invisible.

I guess I got a little blurry

when they tried to focus on me through
a martini glass in St. Barths.

( laughter )

Well, that won't happen to me.

- Oh, hello, darling.
- Hi, sweetie.

- Hello, I'm here.
- Oh.

- Sorry, sweetie.
- Sorry.

- Didn't see you.
- Didn't see you.

Mm-hm.

( laughter )

My plane landed a little late.
How was your reunion?

Oh, I'll tell you. Everybody was so
self-absorbed with their divorces

and their child custody battles,
that it was nearly impossible

to steer them back
to me and my engagement.

Well, there you go.
That's why I hate reunions.

I'll come up with
any excuse I can to avoid them.

Oh, well, this was real.
I actually went to Washington.

Look, I stole you
a White House coaster

to go with your collection
of pilfered memorabilia.

You sweetie,
oh, you know me so well.

You see that's why we're never going to
have the problems that my friends have.

You wouldn't believe the idiotic
reasons that broke up their marriages.

I mean, who cares what television
show you watch before you go to bed?

Well, exactly. "Nightline."

Or "TV Land."

( laughter )

Whatever. Hehehe.

What difference
does it make if you spend

every Sunday coordinating
bathroom towels with wallpaper?

Or going to the driving range?

- Whatever.
- Whatever.

( laughter )

The important thing is I'm
going to wake up every

morning with your arms
around me like this.

Mm.

Well, actually,
to be strictly honest,

it's going to be more like this

because I like to sleep
on the left side of the bed.

That's my side.

Well, not anymore.

( laughs )

( laughter )

But Jews always lie
to the left of center.

( laughter )

Politically, Fran,
not posture-pedically.

( laughter )

Well now, wait a minute here. It seems
I'm making all the compromises.

I'm the one that's moving out of my
place I'm moving into your place.

Yes, well, your place is my place, and
my place is where it's always been...

on the left side of the bed.
It's been there for 40 years.

Yeah, well I've been
on the left side for...

Oh, nice try.

Fran, one of these days you are going
to have to tell me your exact age.

Alright, fine.

You sleep on the left!

Thank you, Niles.

Do you have any more
of that... Miss Babcock cake?

Tons and tons.

( laughter )

Just as in life,
no one's touched her.

( laughter )

Oh, Ma, do you think that it's
bad that me and Mr. Sheffield

are already fighting
and we're not even married yet?

Darling, do you realize
that your father and I

wouldn't even speak
if it weren't for fighting?

( laughter )

That and ordering.

( laughter )

You know, Fran, it's healthy to
get out all of your differences

before you make a commitment.

Look, Kenny and I had to
work through a lot of

things before I would
let him live with me.

Val, Kenny's a dog.

( laughter )

Ma, it's just that we're already fighting
over what side of the bed we sleep on.

Darling, trust me, once you have children,
you'll be too exhausted to fight.

You'll sleep wherever you land.

I guess you're right.

Oh, this is all so trivial.

I mean, the important thing
is Maxwell is a wonderful man

and we love each other.

We're gonna make beautiful babies together.
All before I'm 30.

( laughter )

Who wants cake?

She's loaded with rum,
just like the original.

- Oh, Maxwell, sorry.
- Fran, I apologize.

- Sorry. Oh, you first.
- No, you first.

- No, you first.
- No, I insist.

Oh, look at this. We're fighting
over who ends the fight first.

I did.

Well, technically,
it was me, but whatever.

Oh.

Sweetie, if you want the left side of
the bed, you've got the left side.

The point is that that is the
bed we're going to sleep on

for the rest of our lives.
The bed we're gonna

raise a family on, the
bed that we're gonna...

- Um, excuse me?
- What?

Family?

Well, yeah, family.

I mean, you know, we've never
really discussed this before,

but you do want to have
a family with me, don't you?

Well, I... I, you know, I haven't
really given it much thought yet.

I mean, we do have
three children already.

Yes, and I love them like
they were my own, but

I never got to experience
them taking their first steps,

I never got to rock them
in my arms,

except for that one time Maggie
came home sick from a frat party.

What frat party?

Oh, fra... P.
Frap party.

Frappuccino, cappuccino, all that
caffeine made her very dizzy.

( laughter )

The point is I want
to experience motherhood.

I want to know what it feels
like to be pregnant.

I want to wake up and throw up and be sick
and not just because I opened my Visa bill.

( laughter )

Fran, the thing is, I'm not sure I'm
prepared to have more children.

Well, the time of my biological
clock is running out

so you better decide in the next

15 years.

( laughter )

- Fran...
- I wanna have a baby.

Uh-oh. She wants a baby
of her own.

Once that happens, you'll get shipped
off to some miserable boarding school.

Well, why? You don't go to boarding
school, you go to the same school I do.

My father had a vasectomy.

Oh, darling, I'm sure it's not
half as bad as it seems.

What could he have said?

( Crying )
He doesn't wanna have a baby!

Where is he? I'll kill him.

Five long years
he strings me along

and then he pulls this crap on me
seven weeks before my wedding.

( laughter )

My wedding, Ma.

It's not natural.
I never heard of such a thing.

What man doesn't want to procrastinate
with the woman he loves?

( laughter )

Procreate, Ma.

I don't get it. Why doesn't he
want to have children with me?

I mean,
is there some trait of mine

that he's afraid I'm going
to pass on to the kids?

What could it be?

( laughter )

Amy Irving.

92 million she got when
she split from Spielberg.

Do you think she would've gotten 9 cents
if she didn't have a kid with him?

Ma, what does that have
to do with us?

I don't know,
it just seemed pertinent.

Fran, I am telling
you right now,

if I don't
get grandchildren out of him

I will never set foot
in this house again.

Oh, well, congratulations, Ma,

you have just invented the first
foolproof male contraceptive.

( Knocking door )

Excuse me, sir.

I put together a little card to cheer up
Miss Babcock, would you care to sign?

Let's hope your recovery is
faster than your metabolism.

( laughter )

Niles?

Oh, I see what
you're getting at.

Keep up the insults. Maintain
a sense of normalcy, huh?

Uh, yeah.

- There you go.
- Thank you.

Oh, Niles,

I need a little help
with something.

Why can't Fran just be
happy with what she has?

I mean, we haven't even
walked down the aisle yet.

What are you talking about, sir?

Niles, are you telling me
for the first time in 25 years,

you don't know about something
that goes in this house?

Yes.

What's happening to me?

Without Miss Babcock,

me muse is gone.

Don't be ridiculous.
Even before Miss Babcock

was here you were always
a big fat gossip.

Excuse me? I have better
things to do than...

You thought I was fat?

Fran wants to have
a baby with me.

What, you've forgotten
how to do it?

This is serious, Niles.
I'm not sure I...

I don't think I really want
to go through that again.

You know, all the crying and the diapers
and the waking up at 4:00 in the morning.

Oh, sir, it's really not so bad
when you consider I did all that.

Come to think of it,
you are too old to have a baby.

Well, I'm not that old.

You have three children already.

Why can't Miss Fine
be happy with that?

Because they're not ours.

Having a baby is one of those things
that bonds a couple together.

Oh, that's why we're so close.

( laughter )

You know, maybe it would be fun to
have a baby around the house again.

Niles, do you remember
when the children were little,

that Christmas
we all baked cookies

and I pretended to come today
the chimney as Santa Claus?

That was me too, sir.

You thought I should play Santa,

probably because I was so fat.

( laughter )

What's wrong with Blossom?

( laughter )

Well, I'm worried about what's gonna happen
to me after Fran and Daddy get married.

Gracie found a brochure
for boarding school.

Oh, man. What ages,
what ages? Come on.

8 to 14.

Oh, I'm cool. Write me.

Don't worry about him.
He's an idiot.

I will always be here
for you, Gracie.

( Horn )

Ah, starting tomorrow,
that's Rick.

( laughter )

Hey, sweetie, what's the matter?

Okay, Fran, I want to calmly
discuss the situation.

Okay.

I don't want to go to the place where I'm
saying: "I hate you, I hate you both!"

Gracie, honey, what are you
talking about? What situation?

Well, it has to do
with my friend.

Your friend?

Oh, your friend. Oh, my God.
You got your friend.

What?

Don't worry, sweetie,
these mood swings are normal.

Before your cycle, during your
cycle, and after your cycle.

No, Fran, I'm talking
about my friend Mary Ann.

She said that once you and Daddy
got married, you'll get rid of me,

and then I found this.

Miss Porter's Boarding School?

Oh, Sweetie this
has gotta be a mistake.

And, it isn't nice
for little girls

to go snooping through
their father's private mail.

I don't know where
you learned these things.

( laughter )

Oh, maybe I shouldn't
ask so many questions.

Come on, we'll go
talk to your father.

Maxwell, we need to talk.

It's one thing not to want to
have any more children with me,

but now to send my youngest
off to boarding school...

If you had bothered
to steal the insert

that goes along
with that brochure

you would know that it is
actually a summer drama camp

on Miss Porter's campus.

Well, I don't care what it is,

I'm not sending poor little Gracie
off to some miserable camp.

Hey, Fran, wait,
this place looks awesome.

Eighty-six it, honey I'm
winning this compromise.

And, furthermore, if this is
the way you're going to behave,

maybe it's a good thing we're
not having a child together.

Fran, I'd like
to revisit that discussion.

Go look at your
fun brochure, honey.

( laughter )

Darling, it's not that I don't
want to have children with you,

it's just that we've waited
so long to be alone together.

Anyway, you have a lot of time to
have children, you're still so young.

Oh, come on,
I mean, you got a point.

I want us to spend some time
traveling the world together,

eating in exotic restaurants,

sipping champagne
on beautiful yachts

as they pull into foreign ports.

Well, I was thinking about
a weekend in the Poconos

with a complimentary
bagel breakfast,

but once again, I'll compromise.

( laughter )

Well, I guess it's okay
if we wait a while.

After a while, you don't
make a baby necessarily

on the first time out.

We're gonna need
a lot of practice.

You know you're awfully cute
when you compromise.

You're awfully cute when
you tell me I'm awfully cute.

( laughter )

( photo snap )

A bit more normalcy
for Miss Babcock.

( laughter )

Got a stamp?

( laughter )

Now, well, you see here's
yet another reason

why I should be
on the left side of the bed

because when I put my mini fridge in
here it's gonna open to the right.

You know you could put
in a full-sized

in that corner
with a faux wooden door.

Uh-huh.

It would pass for an armoire.

Oh, look, picture in picture.
" Mr. Ed" and...

who's Madeleine Albright?

She's the Secretary of State.

Would you please
get out of my room?

Aww.

( Applause )