All language subtitles for The.nanny.S05E07.DVDRip.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil) Download
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:05,037 --> 00:00:06,504 Hi! 2 00:00:06,572 --> 00:00:08,473 Your grandmother is such a sucker. 3 00:00:08,540 --> 00:00:13,311 She thinks she's a finalist in Ed McMahon's Publishers' Clearing House. 4 00:00:13,378 --> 00:00:17,682 You're just jealous because I'm gonna be a millionaire. 5 00:00:17,750 --> 00:00:21,753 You better be nice to me because I got a very long memory. 6 00:00:21,821 --> 00:00:23,555 ( laughter ) 7 00:00:23,623 --> 00:00:26,291 Waitress, could I get a cup of decaf? 8 00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:28,059 ( laughter ) 9 00:00:30,029 --> 00:00:31,696 I got a letter for you. 10 00:00:31,764 --> 00:00:32,764 Oh... 11 00:00:34,767 --> 00:00:36,901 From Cambodia... 12 00:00:36,969 --> 00:00:39,438 ( laughter ) 13 00:00:39,505 --> 00:00:42,440 Cambodia? Oh, my Gosh. 14 00:00:42,508 --> 00:00:45,610 Pack your bags, we'll hide her out in Canada. 15 00:00:45,678 --> 00:00:47,645 ( laughter ) 16 00:00:48,948 --> 00:00:52,617 Oh, look, Val, it's from Mai Ling. 17 00:00:52,718 --> 00:00:54,319 Who's Mai Ling? 18 00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:57,955 Oy, these two mashuganas adopted an orphan in High School 19 00:00:58,023 --> 00:01:00,492 at 17 cents a day. 20 00:01:00,559 --> 00:01:04,696 What a steal. Bell Peppers are 4.99 a pound. 21 00:01:04,764 --> 00:01:06,865 ( laughter ) 22 00:01:06,932 --> 00:01:08,499 Ma, we weren't mashiginas, 23 00:01:08,567 --> 00:01:10,902 that poor child happens to come from a country 24 00:01:10,970 --> 00:01:17,108 where you gotta scrape and scrounge and fight for every last morsel of food. 25 00:01:17,143 --> 00:01:20,245 - Just give me a... - Get away or I'll kill ya. 26 00:01:20,313 --> 00:01:21,346 ( laughter ) 27 00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:30,622 Fran, she's coming to New York 28 00:01:30,690 --> 00:01:33,425 - three weeks from the date of this letter. - Oh! 29 00:01:33,492 --> 00:01:35,059 Which is tomorrow! 30 00:01:35,127 --> 00:01:37,261 Ma! 31 00:01:37,329 --> 00:01:39,667 Oh, I'm sorry, I taped it to the refrigerator to 32 00:01:39,679 --> 00:01:41,933 give it to you and then I forgot it was there. 33 00:01:42,001 --> 00:01:45,803 Well, that's because the refrigerator door is never closed. 34 00:01:45,871 --> 00:01:48,506 ( laughter ) 35 00:01:49,608 --> 00:01:51,976 Oh, Fran. 36 00:01:52,044 --> 00:01:54,846 I can't believe our little girl is coming to see us. 37 00:01:54,914 --> 00:01:56,113 Ah... 38 00:01:56,181 --> 00:01:58,382 I wonder which one of us she'll look like. 39 00:01:58,451 --> 00:02:00,652 ( laughter ) 40 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:04,356 Val, she's not going to look like either of us, 41 00:02:04,423 --> 00:02:06,424 because she's adopted. 42 00:02:07,593 --> 00:02:08,827 - Oy. - Ah, yeah. 43 00:02:08,894 --> 00:02:10,428 Oy. Am I an idiot? 44 00:02:10,495 --> 00:02:12,463 - No. - Oh. 45 00:02:12,531 --> 00:02:16,901 Well, let's just pray she inherited your brains. 46 00:02:16,969 --> 00:02:18,970 ( laughter ) 47 00:02:20,206 --> 00:02:22,040 She's got a very good heart. 48 00:02:22,108 --> 00:02:23,441 So does an artichoke. 49 00:02:23,509 --> 00:02:26,077 ( laughter ) 50 00:02:29,682 --> 00:02:32,317 ♪ She was working in a bridal shop in Flushing, Queens, ♪ 51 00:02:32,384 --> 00:02:35,453 ♪ 'Til her boyfriend kicked her out in one of those crushing scenes ♪ 52 00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:39,991 ♪ What was she to do, where was she to go She was out on her fanny ♪ 53 00:02:40,058 --> 00:02:42,660 ♪ So over the bridge from Flushing to the Sheffield's door, ♪ 54 00:02:42,728 --> 00:02:45,797 ♪ She was there to sell make up but the father saw more ♪ 55 00:02:45,864 --> 00:02:51,736 ♪ She had style, she had flair, she was there, that's how she became the Nanny ♪ 56 00:02:51,803 --> 00:02:54,305 ♪ Who would have guessed that the girl we described ♪ 57 00:02:54,373 --> 00:02:56,774 ♪ Was just exactly what the doctor prescribed? ♪ 58 00:02:56,842 --> 00:02:59,344 ♪ Now, the father finds her beguiling, watch out C.C. ♪ 59 00:02:59,545 --> 00:03:02,147 ♪ The kids are actually smiling, such joie de vivre ♪ 60 00:03:02,214 --> 00:03:07,752 ♪ She's the lady in red when everybody else is wearing tan ♪ 61 00:03:07,820 --> 00:03:11,256 ♪ The flashy girl from Flushing, the Nanny named Fran. ♪ 62 00:03:16,228 --> 00:03:18,029 Here's your sandwich, sir. 63 00:03:19,731 --> 00:03:21,799 "Thank you Niles." You're welcome, sir. 64 00:03:23,402 --> 00:03:26,838 "All you do for me and a heart condition on top of it." 65 00:03:28,107 --> 00:03:29,808 I wouldn't let a little angina 66 00:03:29,875 --> 00:03:32,276 keep me from picking up your freshly baked focaccia bread 67 00:03:32,344 --> 00:03:33,511 at 4:00 in the morning. 68 00:03:33,579 --> 00:03:36,514 ( laughter ) 69 00:03:36,582 --> 00:03:39,918 You're right, Niles. I don't appreciate you. 70 00:03:39,985 --> 00:03:42,219 "Well, that's because I don't do squat around here." 71 00:03:42,287 --> 00:03:44,622 Perhaps you should put a bit more effort into it. 72 00:03:44,690 --> 00:03:46,924 "Well, I can't, sir, I'm a lazy old house trow." 73 00:03:46,992 --> 00:03:48,693 ( laughter ) 74 00:03:48,694 --> 00:03:51,496 All I wanted was a simple thank you. 75 00:03:51,563 --> 00:03:53,603 I suppose in order to get some attention around here 76 00:03:53,799 --> 00:03:56,200 I have to hop up on your desk in my short skirt. 77 00:03:56,268 --> 00:03:58,269 ( laughter ) 78 00:03:58,336 --> 00:03:59,470 Did you say, "my"? 79 00:03:59,538 --> 00:04:01,973 ( laughter ) 80 00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:05,476 I was putting myself in Miss Fine's shoes. 81 00:04:05,544 --> 00:04:08,179 Well, you can't wear those wingtips with your skirt, 82 00:04:08,247 --> 00:04:09,747 it'll make you stumpy. 83 00:04:09,815 --> 00:04:13,084 ( laughter ) 84 00:04:13,152 --> 00:04:16,254 He who belts, "I'm going to wash that man right out of my hair," 85 00:04:16,321 --> 00:04:18,321 in the shower should not throw stones. 86 00:04:19,825 --> 00:04:23,828 I assure you, I am the most masculine one in this room... 87 00:04:23,896 --> 00:04:24,696 until now. 88 00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:26,931 ( laughter ) 89 00:04:30,235 --> 00:04:34,372 You know, Maxwell, I can't believe what they get away with on TV these days. 90 00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:38,476 I was watching this rerun of Seinfeld and Elaine must have been, 91 00:04:38,544 --> 00:04:41,045 I don't know, 12 months pregnant, 92 00:04:41,113 --> 00:04:43,712 and they didn't even acknowledge it, they 93 00:04:43,724 --> 00:04:46,584 just keep hiding her behind these huge props. 94 00:04:46,652 --> 00:04:49,887 ( laughter ) 95 00:04:51,156 --> 00:04:52,390 And this needs water. 96 00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:54,392 ( laughter ) 97 00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:56,528 ( clapping ) 98 00:04:57,563 --> 00:04:59,764 Mr. Sheffield, 99 00:04:59,832 --> 00:05:02,173 remember when you told me that I can never 100 00:05:02,185 --> 00:05:04,702 have any more relatives staying at the house? 101 00:05:04,770 --> 00:05:07,138 Yes, but, more importantly, do you? 102 00:05:07,206 --> 00:05:09,040 ( laughter ) 103 00:05:09,108 --> 00:05:12,010 Well, would you make an exception for my daughter? 104 00:05:12,077 --> 00:05:13,878 Your what? 105 00:05:13,945 --> 00:05:18,015 Uh, did I mention that I have a 19-year-old daughter? 106 00:05:18,083 --> 00:05:20,718 But that's impossible. That means you would have had to have been... 107 00:05:20,786 --> 00:05:21,886 10. 108 00:05:21,954 --> 00:05:23,855 ( laughter ) 109 00:05:23,923 --> 00:05:25,956 Yeah, I got her at a UNICEF fair when I was in 110 00:05:25,968 --> 00:05:27,925 High School, Junior High, Elementary School. 111 00:05:28,093 --> 00:05:29,961 ( laughter ) 112 00:05:30,028 --> 00:05:33,297 Well, I think it's wonderful that you're a foster parent, Miss Fine. 113 00:05:33,365 --> 00:05:36,233 Thank you. Does it give you any ideas? You know, 114 00:05:36,301 --> 00:05:39,069 now that I have a kid and you have kids? 115 00:05:39,137 --> 00:05:43,675 ♪ 'Til one day when the lady met this fella, and... ♪ 116 00:05:43,743 --> 00:05:47,078 Miss Fine, if I say she can stay here, will you stop singing? 117 00:05:47,146 --> 00:05:50,315 Oh, thank you, you're such a doll. 118 00:05:50,382 --> 00:05:53,517 Oh, now I just hope that she likes me. 119 00:05:53,585 --> 00:05:56,854 You know how I'm not really good with kids - I mean my own kids. 120 00:05:56,921 --> 00:05:58,922 ( laughter ) 121 00:05:58,991 --> 00:06:02,060 Maxwell, this just came back from the framers, where do you want to hang it? 122 00:06:02,128 --> 00:06:03,461 ( laughter ) 123 00:06:03,528 --> 00:06:06,330 ( music ) 124 00:06:06,398 --> 00:06:07,431 ( doorbell rings ) 125 00:06:07,499 --> 00:06:09,033 Fran: She's here! 126 00:06:09,101 --> 00:06:11,168 She's here! 127 00:06:11,236 --> 00:06:14,772 Oh, we're coming! We're coming! 128 00:06:14,840 --> 00:06:15,840 Oooh! 129 00:06:15,874 --> 00:06:19,210 Oh, honey, let's meet our little girl. 130 00:06:19,245 --> 00:06:21,746 ( laughter ) 131 00:06:21,814 --> 00:06:23,715 Hi! There she... 132 00:06:23,782 --> 00:06:26,083 Hello. I am Mai Ling. 133 00:06:26,151 --> 00:06:29,053 Boy, you really filled out on 17 cents a day. 134 00:06:29,121 --> 00:06:31,388 ( laughter ) 135 00:06:31,456 --> 00:06:32,356 ( chuckles ) 136 00:06:32,424 --> 00:06:34,358 Hello, Mai Ling. 137 00:06:34,426 --> 00:06:37,595 We are your mother and mother. 138 00:06:37,662 --> 00:06:39,263 ( laughter ) 139 00:06:39,330 --> 00:06:42,867 Look how I'm talking to her, like she doesn't understand. 140 00:06:43,001 --> 00:06:44,535 You must be Val. 141 00:06:44,603 --> 00:06:46,237 ( laughter ) 142 00:06:46,305 --> 00:06:48,773 Come in! Come in! 143 00:06:48,840 --> 00:06:52,210 Oh, so beautiful! 144 00:06:52,278 --> 00:06:53,077 Hehe. 145 00:06:53,212 --> 00:06:54,212 This is your house? 146 00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:56,047 Well, I'm working on it, sweetie. 147 00:06:56,114 --> 00:06:58,182 ( laughter ) 148 00:06:58,249 --> 00:07:01,385 I can't wait to meet your husband. Where is he? 149 00:07:01,453 --> 00:07:06,357 Well, hopefully, he's at a very successful law firm, or seeing a patient. 150 00:07:06,425 --> 00:07:08,059 ( laughter ) 151 00:07:08,126 --> 00:07:11,863 Come on, sit down, talk with your mother. 152 00:07:11,930 --> 00:07:14,632 Excuse me, I'm her mother, too. 153 00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:16,534 ( laughter ) 154 00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:21,339 So, sweetie, tell us, how could you afford to fly here? 155 00:07:21,407 --> 00:07:24,408 Oh, I worked since I was 10 years old. 156 00:07:24,476 --> 00:07:25,409 Ooh. 157 00:07:25,477 --> 00:07:27,078 They let you work so young there? 158 00:07:27,145 --> 00:07:29,948 No, sometimes I would lie about my age. 159 00:07:29,982 --> 00:07:32,650 Oh, my baby. 160 00:07:32,718 --> 00:07:34,919 ( laughter ) 161 00:07:34,986 --> 00:07:37,622 My baby, too. 162 00:07:37,689 --> 00:07:39,690 Well, it was my idea to buy her. 163 00:07:39,758 --> 00:07:41,226 Yeah? 164 00:07:41,293 --> 00:07:43,728 It was my idea to go to the fair! 165 00:07:43,796 --> 00:07:47,998 Please! Mommies, don't fight. It put knives in my heart. 166 00:07:48,066 --> 00:07:49,601 There! There! She's Jewish. She's mine. 167 00:07:49,668 --> 00:07:51,335 Oh! 168 00:07:55,440 --> 00:07:59,644 Ma, you are not going to win from Publishers' Clearing House. 169 00:07:59,712 --> 00:08:03,481 You spend your whole social security check on magazines. 170 00:08:03,548 --> 00:08:06,317 What do you need with Runner's Digest? 171 00:08:06,385 --> 00:08:08,820 ( laughter ) 172 00:08:08,887 --> 00:08:11,755 Oh, I thought it just said, "digest." 173 00:08:11,823 --> 00:08:15,126 ( laughter ) 174 00:08:15,193 --> 00:08:19,430 What a pleasure, ladies. Haven't seen you in, what, half a day? 175 00:08:19,498 --> 00:08:20,965 ( laughter ) 176 00:08:21,032 --> 00:08:22,433 How did you get in? 177 00:08:22,500 --> 00:08:24,134 You left the door open. 178 00:08:24,202 --> 00:08:25,670 You had a key made? 179 00:08:25,671 --> 00:08:27,204 Maybe that was it. 180 00:08:27,272 --> 00:08:29,273 ( laughter ) 181 00:08:29,340 --> 00:08:32,877 Where are you running? Niles, darling. 182 00:08:33,078 --> 00:08:36,547 I got a little something on my pursue 183 00:08:36,615 --> 00:08:40,752 at the gas station. I wonder if you could it off for me? 184 00:08:40,819 --> 00:08:41,819 What is it, grease? 185 00:08:41,887 --> 00:08:44,121 Yeah. From a burrito. 186 00:08:44,189 --> 00:08:46,357 ( laughter ) 187 00:08:49,494 --> 00:08:51,174 Niles: It's Sylvia's. 188 00:08:56,101 --> 00:08:59,737 Oh, hi, Ma, Yetta. Now, wait a minute. 189 00:08:59,804 --> 00:09:02,473 You two did go home, yesterday, didn't you? 190 00:09:02,540 --> 00:09:04,074 ( laughter ) 191 00:09:04,142 --> 00:09:07,078 What are you wearing to aunt Frieda's birthday tomorrow? 192 00:09:07,146 --> 00:09:10,314 Oh, I got the most adorable little white polka dot dress 193 00:09:10,582 --> 00:09:14,085 with big colorful fruits all over it. 194 00:09:14,153 --> 00:09:15,453 Like that? 195 00:09:15,520 --> 00:09:17,521 ( laughter ) 196 00:09:17,589 --> 00:09:22,093 Oh, that's it. Oh, look great in it. I'll wear something else to Frieda's. 197 00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:24,529 Oh, ma, Yetta, 198 00:09:24,596 --> 00:09:28,766 I want you to meet my daughter, Mai Ling. She just arrived. 199 00:09:28,867 --> 00:09:30,801 Oh, 200 00:09:30,869 --> 00:09:32,971 I hope you had a Caesarean. 201 00:09:33,038 --> 00:09:35,340 ( laughter ) 202 00:09:35,407 --> 00:09:39,576 Maggie take me to big party and I want to look pretty like my mother. 203 00:09:39,644 --> 00:09:41,484 - Oh, thank you, sweetie. - Thank you, sweetie. 204 00:09:41,513 --> 00:09:42,780 What are you saying? 205 00:09:42,848 --> 00:09:43,648 ( Car horn ) 206 00:09:43,716 --> 00:09:44,948 ( laughter ) 207 00:09:46,718 --> 00:09:49,453 She's here one week and in your clothes already? 208 00:09:49,521 --> 00:09:51,722 Fran, I don't like it. 209 00:09:51,789 --> 00:09:55,359 You don't take advantage of someone when you're a guest in their house. 210 00:09:55,427 --> 00:09:59,563 Niles! How long does it take to clean a purse? 211 00:09:59,631 --> 00:10:02,200 ( laughter ) 212 00:10:02,267 --> 00:10:05,303 Here's your pocketbox, girls. 213 00:10:05,370 --> 00:10:07,071 - Thanks. - Well, time to party, Mai. 214 00:10:07,139 --> 00:10:10,841 But we have to be home early because Maggie has school tomorrow. 215 00:10:10,909 --> 00:10:13,478 Uh, Mai, you say that in front of dad. 216 00:10:13,545 --> 00:10:15,625 She's the one who taught me how to do this. 217 00:10:15,681 --> 00:10:17,048 Yeah. 218 00:10:17,115 --> 00:10:20,251 I taught her everything she knows, hehe. Have fun. 219 00:10:20,319 --> 00:10:21,319 - Bye. - Bye. 220 00:10:21,386 --> 00:10:22,687 - Bye. - So cute. 221 00:10:22,755 --> 00:10:24,522 Do you even know where she's going to? 222 00:10:24,590 --> 00:10:29,160 Uhh... no. But I don't know where Maggie's going either. 223 00:10:29,227 --> 00:10:34,065 Well, I do not think Mai Ling should go out dressed like that. She looks like a hooker. 224 00:10:34,133 --> 00:10:36,067 Well, that's my outfit. 225 00:10:36,134 --> 00:10:37,468 Enough said. 226 00:10:37,536 --> 00:10:39,002 ( laughter ) 227 00:10:39,070 --> 00:10:40,671 What's that supposed to mean? 228 00:10:40,739 --> 00:10:44,275 Oh, come on. This is a big revelation? You dress like a tramp. 229 00:10:44,543 --> 00:10:46,644 ( laughter ) 230 00:10:46,711 --> 00:10:48,646 You know what revelation means? 231 00:10:48,714 --> 00:10:50,047 ( laughter ) 232 00:10:50,114 --> 00:10:53,884 You know, you are always undermining me. 233 00:10:53,952 --> 00:10:57,054 Now, why do I always have to be the bad guy? You spoil her. 234 00:10:57,122 --> 00:11:00,591 Well, what's the big deal if I do spoil her? I can afford it now. 235 00:11:00,658 --> 00:11:03,127 Oh, please, it isn't your money, you're the hired help. 236 00:11:07,499 --> 00:11:09,700 Well, you really learn a lot about a person 237 00:11:09,768 --> 00:11:12,703 when you have a kid with them, that's all I can say. 238 00:11:23,749 --> 00:11:25,683 I'm sensing a lot of anger here. 239 00:11:25,750 --> 00:11:26,984 ( Both ) You think? 240 00:11:27,051 --> 00:11:28,186 ( laughter ) 241 00:11:28,253 --> 00:11:31,488 Okay. I have found that in couples therapy, 242 00:11:31,556 --> 00:11:34,758 it's often useful for the couples, the two of you, 243 00:11:34,827 --> 00:11:38,428 to try to remember what it was that first attracted you to each other. 244 00:11:38,496 --> 00:11:42,767 I mean, for instance, my wife says about me that it was my winning smile. 245 00:11:42,835 --> 00:11:45,235 ( laughter ) 246 00:11:49,007 --> 00:11:51,745 Look, doctor, I've known her since kindergarten. 247 00:11:51,757 --> 00:11:53,777 I simply think I have outgrown her. 248 00:11:53,845 --> 00:11:55,545 ( laughter ) 249 00:11:55,613 --> 00:11:58,482 You see what she does? She always tries to act superior. 250 00:11:58,549 --> 00:12:02,053 You know, that's why so many people did not like her in High School. 251 00:12:02,054 --> 00:12:03,721 Oh, is she stupid! 252 00:12:03,789 --> 00:12:06,190 I was the most popular girl in school. 253 00:12:06,257 --> 00:12:08,392 It said so on all the bathroom walls. 254 00:12:08,460 --> 00:12:10,094 ( laughter ) 255 00:12:10,162 --> 00:12:12,530 Oh! There she goes, calling me stupid again. 256 00:12:12,597 --> 00:12:15,333 You know, for 20 years she's been making fun of me, 257 00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:18,970 and I gotta tell you something, I'm getting damned tired of it! 258 00:12:19,037 --> 00:12:21,038 How dare you! 259 00:12:21,106 --> 00:12:25,710 When I'm the one that's always defending you when everyone calls you dumb! 260 00:12:25,777 --> 00:12:27,945 Yeah? Oww! You know what? 261 00:12:28,013 --> 00:12:29,904 I'm the one that always defended you in High 262 00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:31,649 School when everybody called you a slut! 263 00:12:31,717 --> 00:12:35,486 Oy! Doctor! See how dumb she is? She thinks that's an insult! 264 00:12:35,553 --> 00:12:36,654 Val: Oh! 265 00:12:36,655 --> 00:12:37,788 ( laughter ) 266 00:12:37,855 --> 00:12:41,825 Yeah? Yeah? Well, what about values? Huh? 267 00:12:41,893 --> 00:12:45,529 Those are some values you're teaching our daughter: living with a man out of wedlock! 268 00:12:45,597 --> 00:12:49,500 I'm not in a relationship with Mr. Sheffield! I'm his nanny. 269 00:12:49,567 --> 00:12:53,337 Congratulations, Fran! You just broke through your denial! 270 00:12:53,405 --> 00:12:55,372 ( laughter ) 271 00:12:57,976 --> 00:13:03,313 You know, after 20 years of a relationship you expect a little magic to go out of it, 272 00:13:03,381 --> 00:13:06,050 but this is beyond repair! 273 00:13:06,117 --> 00:13:11,755 I'll tell you something, it is over between us! I am suing you for full custody! 274 00:13:11,823 --> 00:13:13,124 Oh! 275 00:13:13,191 --> 00:13:17,061 Oh! Oh! Huh! 276 00:13:19,832 --> 00:13:23,033 Bigshot, huh? She'll be back. 277 00:13:23,101 --> 00:13:24,935 You know, I drove her, 278 00:13:25,003 --> 00:13:26,737 and she has my keys. 279 00:13:26,805 --> 00:13:28,939 ( laughter ) 280 00:13:33,411 --> 00:13:35,079 Ma. 281 00:13:35,147 --> 00:13:36,880 ( Crying ) Ma... 282 00:13:36,948 --> 00:13:39,183 What is it? Darling, what? 283 00:13:39,251 --> 00:13:44,255 I can't even talk about it. 284 00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:47,825 Good, because your father and I are going to the movies. 285 00:13:47,892 --> 00:13:48,892 ( laughter ) 286 00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:49,960 Maaaa! 287 00:13:50,028 --> 00:13:51,795 ( Crying ) 288 00:13:51,863 --> 00:13:54,532 If we don't get there before three, 289 00:13:54,600 --> 00:14:02,600 we'll miss the free Jalapeno nachos. 290 00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:08,713 Alright. What is it!? 291 00:14:08,780 --> 00:14:11,348 ( laughter ) 292 00:14:11,416 --> 00:14:15,419 Sweetheart, nothing is ever as bad as it seems. 293 00:14:15,487 --> 00:14:19,423 Ma, it's over. We split up. 294 00:14:19,491 --> 00:14:22,225 No! Don't say that! 295 00:14:22,293 --> 00:14:24,829 Oh. 296 00:14:24,896 --> 00:14:30,868 It's true. It was the worst fight we ever had. 297 00:14:30,903 --> 00:14:35,005 Oh, my God, I'm having palpitations. 298 00:14:35,073 --> 00:14:37,107 Quick, get me my medicine. 299 00:14:37,175 --> 00:14:38,008 Oh... 300 00:14:38,075 --> 00:14:39,343 ( laughter ) 301 00:14:48,120 --> 00:14:51,989 ( laughter ) 302 00:14:57,729 --> 00:15:03,534 It was Dr. Miller who said we had irreconcilable differences. 303 00:15:03,602 --> 00:15:05,402 I'll kill that quack. 304 00:15:05,470 --> 00:15:06,636 ( laughter ) 305 00:15:06,704 --> 00:15:09,173 You go back and beg for forgiveness. 306 00:15:09,240 --> 00:15:12,742 Beg a little, for God's sake, you're a single maid. 307 00:15:12,810 --> 00:15:15,712 ( laughter ) 308 00:15:15,781 --> 00:15:18,515 Ma, what are you talking about? 309 00:15:18,583 --> 00:15:21,552 Apologize to Mr. Sheffield. 310 00:15:21,620 --> 00:15:24,254 Ma, I'm talking about Val. 311 00:15:25,790 --> 00:15:28,859 ( laughter ) 312 00:15:30,728 --> 00:15:35,632 I am missing Jalapeno nachos for that moron? 313 00:15:35,700 --> 00:15:37,601 ( laughter ) 314 00:15:40,005 --> 00:15:45,442 Well, consider it a favor to the people sitting behind you. 315 00:15:45,510 --> 00:15:48,912 What the hell do you have to fight about with Val? 316 00:15:48,980 --> 00:15:51,782 Well, it all started over Mai Ling but... 317 00:15:51,850 --> 00:15:54,384 Darling? That's the problem. That girl. 318 00:15:54,452 --> 00:15:56,887 First she mucks up your friendship with Val, 319 00:15:56,955 --> 00:15:59,857 next she'll come between you and Mr. Sheffield. 320 00:15:59,925 --> 00:16:04,094 Oh, ma, she's a baby, she's only 19. 321 00:16:04,162 --> 00:16:06,830 And what were you doing when you were 19? 322 00:16:06,898 --> 00:16:08,398 ( laughter ) 323 00:16:08,466 --> 00:16:12,369 That's different, Ma. I was a very mature 19. 324 00:16:12,437 --> 00:16:13,637 I was 24. 325 00:16:13,705 --> 00:16:16,173 ( laughter ) 326 00:16:16,241 --> 00:16:21,879 Besides, it's crazy. Mr. Sheffield is practically a foster father. 327 00:16:21,946 --> 00:16:23,848 Two words, baby: 328 00:16:23,915 --> 00:16:25,082 Soon Yi. 329 00:16:25,150 --> 00:16:26,516 ( laughter ) 330 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:37,795 Ah-ha. 331 00:16:37,862 --> 00:16:39,596 ( laughter ) 332 00:16:39,664 --> 00:16:44,535 What are you doing home in the middle of the afternoon? 333 00:16:44,603 --> 00:16:46,871 My office is at home. 334 00:16:46,938 --> 00:16:49,273 Huh. 335 00:16:49,340 --> 00:16:53,277 Well, Mr. I've got an answer for everything, 336 00:16:53,344 --> 00:16:55,479 answer me this: 337 00:16:55,547 --> 00:16:58,648 are you having an affair with Mai Ling? 338 00:16:58,716 --> 00:17:00,985 Miss Fine, are you insane? 339 00:17:01,086 --> 00:17:03,987 I have never been this sane in my entire life. 340 00:17:04,055 --> 00:17:06,456 Or this thin, thank you very much. 341 00:17:06,524 --> 00:17:09,059 ( laughter ) 342 00:17:09,127 --> 00:17:12,562 Now, if there's nothing going on between you two, then answer me this: 343 00:17:12,630 --> 00:17:15,933 why do you look so unbelievably handsome? 344 00:17:16,001 --> 00:17:19,436 And explain that extra sparkle in your eyes... hm? 345 00:17:19,503 --> 00:17:21,338 Because I'm looking at you... 346 00:17:22,507 --> 00:17:25,476 ( laughter ) 347 00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:31,114 Oh, please. If I'm so irresistible, then why aren't you all over me? 348 00:17:33,051 --> 00:17:35,386 ( Cheering ) 349 00:17:42,093 --> 00:17:44,028 ( laughter ) 350 00:17:46,965 --> 00:17:48,298 To hell with Mai Ling. 351 00:17:48,366 --> 00:17:50,900 ( laughter ) 352 00:17:54,839 --> 00:17:58,509 Miss Fine! I can't believe you'd accuse me of such a thing. 353 00:17:58,576 --> 00:18:01,077 She's a teenager, for heaven's sakes. 354 00:18:01,145 --> 00:18:05,215 I mean, it's not as if I'm some oversexed 16-year-old boy. 355 00:18:07,818 --> 00:18:10,220 ( laughter ) 356 00:18:14,426 --> 00:18:16,393 What the hell's going on in here? 357 00:18:16,461 --> 00:18:18,395 Well, Dad, I mean, she just knocked on my door, 358 00:18:18,462 --> 00:18:21,464 asked me how to spell a big word and started kissing me. 359 00:18:21,533 --> 00:18:22,866 ( laughter ) 360 00:18:22,934 --> 00:18:25,302 How dare you! 361 00:18:25,370 --> 00:18:27,304 I gotta try that, but how dare you. 362 00:18:27,371 --> 00:18:28,572 ( laughter ) 363 00:18:28,639 --> 00:18:30,006 It's okay, Dad, 'cause we're engaged. 364 00:18:30,074 --> 00:18:31,308 ( Both ) What??! 365 00:18:31,376 --> 00:18:33,477 You are nothing of the sort. 366 00:18:33,545 --> 00:18:36,012 What's the matter? My daughter's not good enough for you? 367 00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:38,548 Miss Fine, they are not engaged, and that's that. 368 00:18:38,616 --> 00:18:41,619 Hello? How else am I going to get my green card. 369 00:18:41,786 --> 00:18:43,286 ( Gasp ) 370 00:18:43,354 --> 00:18:45,722 Oh, well, that's Val's side coming right through, baby. 371 00:18:45,723 --> 00:18:47,057 ( laughter ) 372 00:18:47,124 --> 00:18:49,826 Brighton, how could you let yourself be taken in like this? 373 00:18:49,894 --> 00:18:53,797 Oh, well, let's see. I'm 16, she's a breathing female, 374 00:18:53,865 --> 00:18:56,767 and, uh, I'm 16. That's all you need. 375 00:18:56,835 --> 00:18:57,835 ( laughter ) 376 00:19:02,006 --> 00:19:03,541 Oh, Fran! 377 00:19:05,276 --> 00:19:10,114 I just got your message about May Ling, I can't believe it! 378 00:19:10,181 --> 00:19:13,883 ( Crying ) Where did we go wrong? 379 00:19:13,952 --> 00:19:15,718 Awww... 380 00:19:15,786 --> 00:19:17,754 Oooh. 381 00:19:17,822 --> 00:19:22,392 Oh Val, it isn't our fault. We were too young when we had her. 382 00:19:22,460 --> 00:19:23,893 ( Crying ) 383 00:19:23,962 --> 00:19:27,331 - I'm sorry. - I love you. 384 00:19:27,398 --> 00:19:30,334 - I missed you. - I love you. 385 00:19:30,401 --> 00:19:32,903 Oh, Fran, 386 00:19:32,971 --> 00:19:37,807 let's promise never again to let our kids come between us. 387 00:19:37,875 --> 00:19:43,046 What kids? As of this moment, I'm disowning her. 388 00:19:45,549 --> 00:19:47,417 Me too! 389 00:19:47,485 --> 00:19:49,219 Val! 390 00:19:49,287 --> 00:19:52,021 Well, why ruin two jackets? 391 00:19:54,592 --> 00:19:56,493 Hi, moms. 392 00:19:56,494 --> 00:20:01,765 Don't "moms" us. It's Miss Fine and Miss Toriello to you. 393 00:20:01,833 --> 00:20:04,701 I'm so sorry that I hurt you. 394 00:20:04,768 --> 00:20:09,039 I'll leave and stay with my friend I met last night at the party. 395 00:20:09,107 --> 00:20:12,476 His mother has a big apartment in the city. 396 00:20:12,543 --> 00:20:13,543 Oh. 397 00:20:13,611 --> 00:20:15,578 ( laughter ) 398 00:20:17,115 --> 00:20:18,848 I'm walking to the door. 399 00:20:18,916 --> 00:20:19,916 ( Muttering ) 400 00:20:21,953 --> 00:20:23,787 I'm almost to the door. 401 00:20:23,855 --> 00:20:24,955 Oh. 402 00:20:26,458 --> 00:20:29,460 Are you never going to speak to me again? 403 00:20:29,527 --> 00:20:31,494 Speak to you? 404 00:20:31,562 --> 00:20:35,632 You used us. You almost broke up me and your mother. 405 00:20:35,699 --> 00:20:38,168 And you hurt the people that I love. 406 00:20:38,235 --> 00:20:40,770 We can't even look at you. 407 00:20:40,839 --> 00:20:41,739 Huh! 408 00:20:41,806 --> 00:20:44,441 ( laughter ) 409 00:20:44,509 --> 00:20:49,112 Well, if you change your mind, here's the number where I will be staying. 410 00:20:49,180 --> 00:20:52,249 If I or my friend, Jason, is not there, 411 00:20:52,317 --> 00:20:56,152 just ask for his mother. Miss Barbra Streisand. 412 00:20:56,220 --> 00:20:58,889 ( laughter ) 413 00:21:01,126 --> 00:21:04,894 Goodbye, Miss Fine, Miss Toriello. 414 00:21:04,962 --> 00:21:09,833 ( Both ) So formal with your mother. 415 00:21:09,900 --> 00:21:12,068 ( laughter ) 416 00:21:14,872 --> 00:21:19,209 Thanks for buying these subscriptions off me, Neil. 417 00:21:19,277 --> 00:21:22,012 ( laughter ) 418 00:21:28,252 --> 00:21:30,420 ( sighs ) 419 00:21:30,488 --> 00:21:32,723 Yetta, you said a few. 420 00:21:35,359 --> 00:21:38,295 I also said you were invited to my wedding. 421 00:21:39,864 --> 00:21:41,498 You mean I'm not? 422 00:21:41,565 --> 00:21:45,869 Well, you'll be there, but you won't exactly be a guest. 423 00:21:47,671 --> 00:21:50,174 Wear comfortable shoes. 424 00:21:50,241 --> 00:21:52,443 ( laughter ) 425 00:21:52,510 --> 00:21:54,244 Thanks, Neil! 426 00:22:00,618 --> 00:22:02,286 ( laughter ) 427 00:22:08,559 --> 00:22:09,826 What? 428 00:22:16,167 --> 00:22:18,067 ( Applause ) 31115

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.