All language subtitles for Moone.Boy.S01E02.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DD+5.1.H.264-playWEB_track3_[eng]

It was election time in
Ireland and a charismatic young senator

was running for President.

Vote Mary!

Bright, passionate, articulate,
and most amazingly of all, a lady.

Not an iron lady,
a human, woman lady.

Vote Mary for President.

No, that's not her, you fool!

That's her opponent,
Brian Lenihan.

-Vote Mary. Vote Mary.
- There she is! There's Mary Robinson!

Not a tart with a heart
but a heart who makes tarts!

Vote Mary.

The Mary
Robinson campaign had such low hopes of victory

in the Lenihan
stronghold of Boyle

that they put
very little funding into the region.

But call it feminism,
call it nationalism, call it boredom...

I'm really cold, mum.

...but Debra and the girls
decided to take up the cause.

A woman for President, is it?

Yeah.

This would be a lot
for her to take on.

All that stress.

I wouldn't
like to do that to her.

She does want to
be the President.

Does she, though?

I mean, I'm signing up for
stuff all the time without thinking it through.

Maybe I could vote for her
to be the President's wife.

- Oh, for...
- That's grand.

You just put a big "X" beside
Mary's name and then she'll be the President's wife.

- All right?
- All right.

Unless there's any strong
male candidates, of course.

* Dancing at the disco,
bumper to bumper

* Wait a minute,
where's me jumper?

* Where's me jumper,
where's me jumper?

* Where's me jumper,
where's me jumper Oh, no *

In
a bitter-sweet business coup,

Liam Moone had won the Lenihan
poster contract for the whole county.

Which really
amused Debra Moone... - Hi, Mum.

As she headed off
to her Mary Robinson campaign meeting.

You're sure you
don't need a hand?

I'm okay, actually, pal.

What's she doing here?

De-clawing swans.
What does it look like I'm doing, dumbnut?

But what about
Butch and Sundance?

It's been ages
since we last did a job together.

Martin, I thought you said you
were gonna fill the spray gun up for me?

Oh, balls.

I'm from Sweden!

Yeah.

I suppose it has.

Where's Mum?

- Campaign meeting.
- Again?

Trish, you're not cooking dinner
tonight, are you?

If you want to do the cooking,
that's fine with me.

Okay! Let's not go crazy here.
Everyone just calm down.

What delights
have we got in store?

Just some rice
and veg and potatoes

and sausages.

All in the same pot?

It saves on washing up.

Oh, that's a shame, Trish.
You know I can't eat cauliflower.

That's broccoli.

Okey-doke. I think
I'm going to go and have a little cry.

Cool, I'll give you a shout
when it's ready.

Just waiting for the plastic
to dissolve.

Every day,
there is more enthusiasm.

People have thought
about the presidency,

they want something different,
they want change...

Look at her there,
with her strong hands and her bouncy hair.

She's like the Joan
of Arc of Connaught.

Sorry, where were we?

- Strategy meeting.
- Right. Thank you, Debra.

Now, I was thinking,

if it wasn't too much trouble,

doorstep canvassing.

- How do we feel about that?
- I'd welcome the opportunity.

Oh, not right now, Gwen.

Yeah, you know,
it's all very well, the door-to-doors,

but we really need to get
more Mary posters up.

The one we have is great,
but it's just not enough.

There's only one Mary poster?

It seems like more.

That's 'cause I keep
moving it around every night.

And I needn't tell you ladies

how quickly Velcro loses
its velcrosity after a shower.

- Don't talk to me...
- Jesus.

Still, we have our
mobile campaign unit.

It's just not
very presidential, though, is it?

No, it's not, it's not.

Is there no chance
Liam will give us a few freebies?

We can't expect charity,
ladies. We simply have to raise some funds.

What a lovely man Liam is.

- Oh, he is. He's a lovely man.
- Aye, he's gas.

Yeah. Yeah, but as I was saying
about the funding...

- Let's not have an argument.
- What? Who's arguing?

Sorry, but it felt like
an argument there for a second.

No, no one's arguing.

- I think you're arguing, Debra.
- She is, yeah. Yeah.

It was a bit snidy.

No, I am just suggesting
that we approach

the more affluent citizens of
Boyle and ask for political donations.

- Excellent.
- After the meeting, Gwen.

You're such a clever person.
We should do that.

War averted.

Does anyone in
Boyle have money?

- There's Pat Burke.
- No, he's dead, sure.

Oh, that's right.

- James Brogan?
- Dead.

The other one.

Oh, yeah, from Bridge Street.
I thought you meant...

The butcher?
No, he's long gone.

Yeah, the big C got him.

- Hit by a car.
- The younger one.

Yeah, he's dead, too.

Francie Feeley has money.

Touchy Feeley.

He's such a letch.

Yeah, my Roger wouldn't like
me going near Touchy Feeley's house.

Right, we're in agreement
so to forget that idea.

Francie "Touchy" Feeley
owned the local fish factory.

He was a rich,
uncomplicated tool,

whose nickname was earned due
to his overexuberant affection.

Smack your arse there.

Touchy's physical bonhomie
may have been welcomed

had he not always borne
the fresh scent of gutted mackerel.

There's more than
one way to skin a cat.

You don't want to be the cat.
All right. Bye-bye, now, Father.

Presidential election news now. In Feeder Falls,

candidate Brian Lenihan was
seen surging ahead today in the opinion polls,

while Labour's
Mary Robinson insists she is still in the race.

They say quite openly,
"This time I'm voting

"for the best person to be
President and I'm going to vote for you."

I'll mop the floor
with you, Robinson.

This is quite
progressive of you, Brian.

When you lose the election,
you'll make a good house-husband.

The origins
of the Workers' Party

can be found in
the early 1960s, with the more modern...

We are not eating that shit.

Oh, great! I'm on time.
I thought you'd have finished eating.

I have.

Did you get a haircut?

Just a trim.
What do you think?

- Oh, my God, you got the Mary!
- I did.

What is it? Is it a person?

I love it, Mum.
The Mary is so in at the moment.

- Stop it.
- It's modern and sophisticated...

- Go on.
- And articulate.

An articulate haircut?

You wouldn't understand.
It's about feminism.

So, is it shorter than it was?

Lord.

Sorry, wrong house.

Great.

Yeah, I think I'll try
another house, too.

This election
is more important for them as women

than any membership
of any political party.

I was thinking, to help
ease your conscience,

maybe I'll let you do
a few Mary posters for free.

Just so you can
sleep better at night.

That's your fake snore.

Your real snore is
far more unpleasant.

I said I'd give
you a discount. Now, push over.

Oh, I suppose
there's just no room for a modern woman these days.

All right, Joni Mitchell,
park your horse.

I like Mary, I do.
I have to get paid, though.

How do you feel
about half-price?

Well, not great.

But half of
nothing is nothing.

So sure, half-price it is.
Now, shift over.

Do we have
the clappy light thing?

The bulb's loose.

- Want some?
- Nah.

I'm going to show off
my new look. I'm going to go for another strut.

Back the truck up.

That's no rice sandwich.

Is that... No.

Oh, sweet mercy, that's gravy.

Oh,
it smells like angels.

Is that jasmine?
Is that what that is?

It's jasmine.
It's jasmine gravy.

Delicious Baby J,
did you see that?

You know what that is,
don't you?

Do it.
Follow your gut, Martin.

Martin! That child is eating
a homemade Wagon Wheel!

I don't believe we've met.

- Look at this place.
- He calls it the Pollack Palace.

Although the guards
call it Elm Street.

'Cause so many women come
running out screaming.

We have to do it.

For Mary.

So, your mam's an actual chef?

Well, kind of.

She's a pastry chef.

A pastry chef!

Well, she doesn't do it
full-time any more,

so now she just
bakes for us at home.

Just bakes for you at home!

Yeah, it's so boring.

All she talks about is
bloody delicious food.

If I eat one more
eclair this week,

I think I might scream.

Mmm...

Cream.

- Are you, okay?
- Yeah.

Never been butter.

- Want to come in and play?
- Oh, yes, I'm starving.

Our granddaughters
will thank us.

I had a hysterectomy in 1984.

You're talking gobbledegook!

It's not my fault
you didn't read the ad properly!

Hello, you must be suffragettes.

Uh, skedaddle up there,
but pop your shoes off first,

and your socks.

Well, Barbara,
that was delicious.

Duck l'orange?
Birds and fruit?

Who knew? I'm going to go home
and stick a banana in a pigeon.

Yeah, or a pineapple
in a pheasant.

Yeah, I don't think
that would work, Mike.

We're just so glad
that Trevor's made a friend.

A best friend.

Is that Pavlova?

It's Pavlova Tuesday.

- Want some jus?
- You bet I feckin' jus!

Thanks, Eclair.

As Martin filled
his neglected belly,

the Robinson crusaders
tried to fill their campaign chests.

And we think she'd be great
for women's rights

and, er,
breaking down boundaries.

There's nothing I like more
than breaking down women's boundaries.

For too long, women
have had their hands tied,

struggling to breathe
beneath mirrored ceilings.

Um, glass ceilings?

Indeed. It's like Mary said,
you know,

"If the rights of
women are constrained, no man can be truly free.

"He may have the power,
but he'll not have the freedom."

Wow, you're actually
quoting her.

You seem surprised.

Did I not tell you I
was a big Mary man?

You do seem like
a big Mary man, all right.

That I am.

I'm huge.

Do you not have one of those
full-size Mary posters?

You know,
with the legs and everything?

No. No, I'm afraid we don't.

Why not? If I had a body like
hers, I'd be displaying it everywhere.

The thing is, we're actually
kind of having some funding issues.

Not any more, you're not.

What do you mean?

Well, I'll give you the money.

Was that
not obvious? That's...

'Cause I was
pointing at meself with me thumb.

Oh, right. Yeah, of course.

Sorry.

Well, anything that you can do
to help the cause...

- A thousand pounds.
- Wow!

That would be amazing.

That's no problem.
You know, it's like the old saying,

"You scratch my back,"
et cetera.

Great!

Sorry,
When you say "scratch"...

"Nobody puts
Mary in the corner."

Dirty Dancing. Brilliant.
Will you watch a film?

Um...

No, I think we'd better go.

I think you better.

I think you better.

Yeah,
we'd better go.

Now, would they be pop socks
or a full tight?

Uh, full tight.

Can't tell.

Au revoir, mes...
Mes petites revolutionnaires.

- Oh, he speaks French.
- Whoo!

Well, they have the best maids.

You all right there?

Oh! Give us a kiss.

Hey, come here!
You don't get away so easy.

Bye.

She nearly
slipped through me net. - DEBRA: I did.

Thank you again,
Mr Feeley, that was...

- It's very refreshing.
- All right, I'll be in touch.

Oh, that was delicious.

Barbara truly does have wands
for hands.

Yeah.

I think I was
too chatty, though.

What?

Nope, you were charming,
is what you were, sir.

- Really?
- Yeah, really.

Your missing
pencil case anecdote. It killed me, as always.

- Well, that is a great story.
- Yeah.

I can't wait to go
back tomorrow night.

Oh, do you really think
I should go back so soon?

Of course you should! Oh...

Martin, they'd be so
disappointed if you weren't here tomorrow night.

They wouldn't even eat!

You are so right.

- I'm too hard on myself.
- I'm always saying it.

But would Martin's best
friend be so welcoming of his new pastry pal?

You're a riot.

I didn't say anything.

Well, this is a bit sudden.

You're all over that new kid
like a tramp on chips.

Chips? Are people
still eating chips?

Here, try this.

That is a chocolate mouse,
injected with homemade creme egg.

His mam makes them, P!

With her wand hands!

Oh! I get it.

So you're just using him.

Ah, that's grand, then.

62247.

It's 62248
I'm looking for.

No problem, bye-bye.

Wait, wait, I'm joking with you.

It's me.

Oh, hi, Mr Feeley.

I was yanking
your old chain there.

- Good one.
- Right-o. Well,

I've a cheque
that I've written here for you.

That's great. Thanks again.

I've been thinking about what
I'd like you to do to return the favour.

Oh!

Right!

I'd like you to come over
and do a spot of cleaning for me.

Excuse me?

Remember, we were talking
about scratching each other,

and, uh, you know,
when I said I'd give you the thousand pounds.

Well, I'm sure
we can get someone to go over and do that.

No, no, no.
It has to be yourself and Linda.

These foreign cleaners
are dropping like flies.

I need strong Irish backs
for the things I need doing.

Well, I'll have to talk
to Linda, of course...

Brilliant! I'll see you
later on.

And Debra?
Um, wear something nice.

Oh, hi, Martin.

I wasn't sure what we were
eating, so I just brought a bottle of both.

Cover all bases.

Erm... I'm going to
open this one

and you might want to
throw that in the fridge.

And there's no chance
he just wants you to clean his house?

They call him "Touchy" Feeley,
not "Keeps His Hands To Himself" Feeley.

Look, I'm happy to
embarrass myself for the cause.

Sure, look it, if I have to
parade around in whatever

and do a little polishing
for the sake of feminism, then so be it.

It's all for the greater good.

Yeah, and I've got some stuff
we can wear. What's your bra size?

No!

I'm... I'm not finished.

We're here to
better our plight, not muddy it.

This is our time!

I've rented myself
to enough bad men.

It's time to own myself.

Votes or no votes,
if we succumb to this endless BS, we lose.

And I'm here to win.

For every Irish woman
who's sick and tired

of the fish-stenched
mouth of sexism.

And so
our brave ladies of the night

planned a subliminal campaign
for the ages.

No, they didn't
have money for posters

and no,
they couldn't be bothered going door-to-door.

So they did what women do.
They used trickery to get what they wanted.

Hello. Is this
the Shannonside FM request line?

Smokey Robinson there.

And now again,
by popular request, here's Mary by The 4 of Us.

* Oh Mary

* Why don't you
have some sense

* Please do something

Vote for Mary.

Amen.

- Vote for Mary.
- What?

Vote for Mary.

* Why don't you
have some sense

* Please do something

Nice.

* Oh Mary *

Meanwhile,
with our latchkey kid...

Oh, hey, Babs. What's cookin'?

Oh. Is Trevor not joining us?

Martin, uh...

Tonight is just, uh...
It's family night.

But it's Tuesday.

Pavlova Tuesday.

Tuesday is family night now.

Actually, every night
is family night now.

But I brought my own jus.

Martin, will you
please just let us be?

Well, girls, here's the poll.
Moment of truth.

Oh, God.

60% for Brian,
10% for Mary.

30% for Mary as
the President's wife.

No change, then.

So much for campaigning
without posters.

Maybe we should just be happy
with her as the President's wife.

- Yeah.
- No!

Well, what else can we do?

Good question, Noreen.
What else could you do?

With the electorate stuck in
the past and Liam holding firm on half-price,

Debra was forced to turn to
the fresh, fishy friend of feminism.

Hello, Francie, it's me.

I thought I told you
to leave me alone, you...

No, no, no. Sorry, sorry.
It's Debra Moone.

Well, Debra,
it's about time.

You know,
this back-scratching offer is about to expire.

So, we're still on
for the thousand pounds, then?

So long as you're still on
for getting down and dirty,

by which I mean
doing the cleaning.

And remember,
wear something nice.

Why do you even have these?

Don't ask
any questions, Deb.

I just can't believe
they still fit us.

Come in, girls!
The water's warm!

I'm looking
forward to this, girls.

I've been feeling
awful filthy today.

Well, wouldn't you know it.

The suffragettes
finally bottled it.

Women.

You know,
I think you'll do just grand.

Slip your shoes off.

And your socks.

I feel so ashamed.
Is this really necessary?

Deb! If we are going to
demean ourselves for Mary,

then we're going
to do it properly, the way she'd want it done.

Absolutely!

Exploitation for the nation.

What the...

Marys.

Non-velcro Marys.

Thanks to Liam
and Mary men around the country,

the new
presidential voice of Ireland would be a feminine one...

Citizens of Ireland...

Ish.

You have chosen
me to represent you.

Scrub him good, Dad!

I can still smell fish.

May God direct me

so that my presidency
is one of justice, peace and love.

Right in there!

May I have the fortune
to preside over an Ireland

at a time of
exciting transformation...

Now, come on, Liam,
you know what to do. Just do it.

Get in there, Butch.

Right in all
the nooks and crannies, where the fishy smell hides.

Where hope
and history rhyme.

For I, the President,
can sing to you

the joyous refrain...

Oh, for the love of God!

"I am of Ireland.
Come dance with me in Ireland."

I feel like a Ghostbuster.

* Oh Mary

* Why don't you
have some sense

* Please do something

* To restore my confidence

* Oh Mary

* Why don't you
have some sense

* Please do something

* Oh Mary
Why don't you have some sense *