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Kids!

I told you to be quiet!

I don’t want to hear a whisper!

Okay Ms. Hande.

Yakup!

-Don’t panic. I’m coming to help you in a minute. -Okay.

We’re in the 53rd minute of the game in Rize. Giresunspor is attacking...

Corner kick.

It was a tiring journey, wasn’t it?

Mom, dad and I drove here.

From İstanbul to Rize, it’s approximately...

...a 13 hour drive.

I drive it in 10 hours.

You know, with the breaks and everything...

I take breaks too.

-Certainly. -Did you all drive together, dear?

No, sir. Mom, dad and I drove.

-My brother Selim and sister-in-law Sultan... -Me and my wife preferred to fly.

She hates driving long distance.

I’m the first bride of the family. They really hold me dear.

Right, mom?

You two get along so well.

We do.

She’s a mother to me. Not a mother-in-law.

-Mom... -Yes, dear?

Mrs. Necla, my husband says, “The tea is making me sweat.”

“I might catch a cold, and I don’t have spare clothes. I’d like to take my jacket off, if you don’t mind.”

Of course not.

-Dad, let me... -Take it off.

Dad doesn’t talk a lot.

He’s a man of few words.

Right, dad?

-Yes. -He said, “Yes.”

Now he finds the space for a shot.

I love you.

It was Hande who introduced us.

Let’s say I brought them together.

Yes.

-Fatih is a friend of mine from university. -Yes.

-And Gizem is my childhood friend from Rize. -Right.

When I posted a photo of Gizem on Instagram one day...

Me and Sultan met at a wedding. She suddenly took my arm in the dance.

We were dancing the halay so fast, soaked in sweat.

I don’t normally sweat. We really got carried away. It was delirious.

We looked around and there was nobody left in the dance. We were so close.

Our eyes met.

“I’m Sultan”, she said. “And you?”

I said, “I’m Selim”. She said, “Oh, that’s Sultan Selim!”

“Take me to your palace”, she said.

I really liked flirtatious girls back then.

Shut up now!

I should go and help Gizem.

Please go.

Yavuz is calling.

-Yavuz! -It’s a video call.

Yavuz is our younger brother. He’s studying in Europe.

-He submitted his passport for the residence permit.-Brother...

-So he couldn’t come. Sorry.-How is it going? I’m curious.

-How are you?-There’s too much noise.

Yavuz! My dear son.

Have you asked for the girl’s hand yet? Is her killjoy father giving her?

There’s no reception. Perhaps you should hang up.

“Is he giving the girl?”

-You’re an idiot!-What?

Hang up!

Gizem.

Have you met your co-sister-in-law before?

No, I haven’t.

But she’s a nice woman...

-Different. -Well, I like her.

I’m getting this right, am I not? You’ll be opposite neighbors.

Fatih wants that. She says she’ll help me out.

I’m thinking, perhaps you should live a bit apart.

Maybe you won’t get along. It’s not good to be too intimate.

No, but listen.

My father-in-law had this building built in the land he owns.

He got three apartments. One of them is ours.

I mean, he’s giving it to us.

We won’t be paying rent. Why live somewhere else?

And why wouldn’t I get along with my co-sister-in-law?

Do you need any help?

Sister Şükran! No, we took care of everything.

It’s Sultan, dear. Not Şükran.

I’m very sorry, sister.

I was confused for a moment.

“Sister?”

Don’t call me that. There’s only two or three years between us.

You’re not wearing your proposal ring?

Oh, I am.

-Look. -Let me see.

Oh, it’s that.

Where’s the stone?

Okay, it’s there.

What’s that!

That’s like a grain of sand! Oh dear.

But it’s beautiful. He got me just what I wanted.

-It’s simple and elegant. -Girls, I don’t mean to flaunt, but...

...mine is bigger!

Hey! Don’t look for too long. You may envy me.

-It looks great on you. -What about the wedding dress?

The one you tried on the other day. You liked that one.

We haven’t decided, but that one we I tried on was nice, I think.

-The tulle one? -Yes. It looked great on you.

It has long tulle on the shoulders.

-It’s nice. -You’ll wear a wedding dress?

Yes, of course.

Don’t get me wrong, dear. I’m just worried...

...people might say, “That girl is my mother’s age!”

“And she’s wearing a wedding dress!”

Oh, girls. There’s a strong smell here.

Is it coming from you...

...or is it in the kitchen?

So, bye to you!

Was that a jab or what?

It definitely was.

Mom, she’s such a silly girl. Not everyone can be like me, of course.

Oh God...

-Bravo! -My God...

My God... Way to go!

-Come on. -Let’s show our rings.

-I’ll take a photo now. -Yes.

-So you’re getting married... -I am, brother!

Bravo!

I can’t believe my brother is getting married!

-Brother! -He’s getting married!

I’m so excited.

We’ll get along very well, my dear co-sister!

Let’s take a photo.

-We’re co-sisters now, girl. -Yes.

We’ll get along so well.

I hope so, big sister Sultan.

Ta-ta!

This is our street.

We’ll walk happily down this street and get our bread.

Fatih, this place is beautiful!

Wait until you see inside the apartment, once it’s done.

I’m so excited.

No, wait. Don’t! Please!

HOME SWEET HOME

Fatih, stop it!

-Are you crazy? Put me down, please! -Why?

I heard new brides love to enter the house like that.

Really? Am I like those girls?

Aren’t you?

Fatih, put me down! The whole building will hear us.

Put me down!

-Fatih, we’ll wake them up! -Come on.

Fatih!

Look at that kitchen!

It’s incredible!

So beautiful!

I love it! It looks great.

It’s so beautiful.

They brought the furniture too.

Finally.

What could they do...

We got married in a hurry. Everything was left to the last minute.

-This is yours. -Fatih!

-It’s our home. -It’s our home.

The place is a mess. I’ll get you a cleaning lady.

No, I’ll clean it up in a day. Don’t worry.

That’s my modest wife!

I’ll go to the toilet, okay?

-I’ll change my clothes and go to work. -Okay.

Shall we tell your parents, hubby?

Didn’t we stop doing that?

“Hubby”. Isn’t that lovely?

Please don’t say that. I don’t like it.

Okay.

Fatih, are you alright?

This rug slips. It might cause an accident.

Co-sis!

Good morning.

I made pastry. Eat it while it’s hot. It’s hand-rolled.

-You shouldn’t have bothered, but thanks. -What’s wrong with you? Are you sick?

-What is it? -Come here.

Oh, you’re not wearing make-up. Terrible. Always wear make-up.

Oh, no way! They brought the wrong ones!

I told them, “You don’t put office furniture in a home”, but they didn’t listen.

You shouldn’t have opened them. How will you return them now?

This isn’t office furniture. It’s our own furniture.

I saw it on Instagram. The hotel looks terrible.

Dark, dirty, cheap. I was so sorry. You should’ve chosen Dubai. We’re going there.

We’re better off.

Good for you.

Come here.

We had this neighbor’s daughter...

She wasn’t like you. She was a very beautiful girl.

Her honeymoon went very bad. And they got divorced right away!

-So? -It just crossed my mind.

These are terrible.

You’re coming for dinner tonight, by the way. Just the four of us.

I’m not inviting my in-laws. I’ll make a quick pasta or something.

Our apartment is more comfortable. It’s very well decorated.

I don’t want you to suffocate here from day one, right?

This furniture bears down on you.

You don’t get me wrong, do you? Words just jump out of my mouth.

I don’t mean any disrespect.

What an ugly coat stand!

Did you hear that?

I can’t hold my tongue. I can’t lie!

If I called that chubby face of yours beautiful, God would strike me dead.

Or if I called that ugly furniture nice, I couldn’t sleep at night!

Who’s that?

Don’t stare at me, chubby face.

I said, “Alright?”

Of course it’s alright, big sister Sultan.

“Big sister”...

Let me see.

Every organ on your face is too big and crooked.

I’m revolted. I don’t know how you live with it.

So, bye to you!

I’m calm.

I don’t feel like grabbing my co-sister’s hair and dragging her around the whole building.

That’s my wife!

My dear...

God, I love Fatih so much. I don’t want to do anything that will hurt him...

I’ll make you pay for that “big sister” tonight!

What was that?

-Are you tired, darling? -No.

-Do you like it? -A lot.

Great job.

-Fatih. -Yes, dear?

I think these clothes are too casual. Should I change them?

-And we’re not taking a gift either. -You look lovely.

-She told you, it will be just us. -She did, but didn’t you say...

...you only saw Sultan in family dinners and didn’t know her much?

-So? -So, look at me...

There’s nothing wrong with you? Take it easy. What will she do, take a jab at you?

We’re a family now.

Right. We’re a family.

Welcome!

Sultan?

Oh, my parents are here too.

Really?

I guess you’re going straight to bed afterwards! You’re wearing pajamas.

And no gifts. Are we a little unrefined or what?

Crooked girl! Come in.

Take off your shoes. It’s an expensive floor.

Guess whose table this is...

It’s my table!

You didn’t eat anything, dear. Have some of mom’s stuffings.

I will, Fatih.

I had no idea she’d prepare something like this.

Okay.

Mom, is that you? I can’t see you through the candles.

It’s me, dear.

Your father wants the salt.

Oh, it’s a candle.

I love these family dinners.

Me too. I wish Yavuz was here.

Right.

But Selim, I think Yavuz looks more like you.

Yes, he’s handsome like my husband.

Don’t say that. Am I not handsome?

I got bloated. I used to be good. I was like a bullet in my youth.

A belly is a man’s belt of pride.

So, I guess you’re all tall in the family.

No, my husband is taller than yours. And I’m taller than you.

That’s nice.

But I want a grandchild now!

You know the situation, mom. My Sultan has certain concerns.

Why are you...

I’m too young, mom. I’ll have a baby later. When I feel ready.

Young? You’re 36 now.

Oh, shut up!

So, why don’t you give us a grandchild?

Me? I really want a child, but I’m thinking of getting a job first.

It’s your body and your decision, dear. Look at that beauty...

Enough of the salad, dad. Look at my beautiful wife!

-I’m so glad I married you. -Fatih...

-I’m so glad you married me. -She’s wonderful...

Everyone who saw the wedding video messaged me and said...

-“What a beautiful bride!” -Thank you...

You know what?

Doesn’t she look like a Hollywood actress?

-No way. -Exactly!

-Come on. -Right. She has a European vibe to her too.

-Look at those big eyes! -Fatih, stop it!

-Look at her smile! Smile for me! -You’re embarrassing me.

-What about those dimples? What about them? -Stop it, Fatih.

A mosquito bit me!

They always bite me.

Because my skin is so smooth.

Right, darling?

-Yes… -How is your mother?

-My parents are fine. They send their regards. -Thank you.

They miss me, but they’re fine...

...mom.

You called me “mom”? That’s lovely!

-Did you call my mother “mom”? -Yes.

Of course I did. What else should I call her...

Selim, stop it!

He pinched my waist!

Do you have any idea where we are? My parents are here!

My Casanova!

-Don’t make things up. -Shut up! Don’t lie.

Come here. Come here!

I love you.

Like on our first day.

Me too.

Come on, snap time.

Fatih, what’s a snap?

-Snap... -Get together for the snap...

-Ah, I see. -Dad...

Mom, come closer.

That was great.

You’re not in the frame.

It’s alright.

MY KITCHEN

Put them over here.

You’re surprised, aren’t you?

-This is Hürrem’s kitchen! -Hürrem?

-The “Sultan”. -It’s very nice.

-I was going to ask you something... -Look...

...at my golden mixer tap!

It’s great.

I was wondering, why...

Look at my closet handles.

Pure gold.

Why didn’t you tell me our in-laws...

Look at my bottle cover.

It’s got golden guipure.

It looks great.

-Why didn’t you tell me our in-laws would come? -I guess you’ve already seen these.

They’re very nice.

You know, I’m wearing my casual clothes. It’s somewhat inappropriate.

Look at you.

You’re a sloppy, loud-mouthed girl.

Everything about you is inappropriate. Even that thing on you.

A cardigan!

You don’t have a feminine spirit like me. Who cares if you dress up?

-That’s uncalled for. -Look at my carpet.

Don’t look too much. You might envy me.

No, look. Don’t be shy. I’m kidding.

I want to show you my bedroom too, but...

...I’m hesitating.

-You’re new in the family. You might envy me. -No, I won’t.

I have a great bedroom.

You know, your bedroom is a bit...

What?

I promised Selim, but I can’t help but say it.

I know you have no taste, but why decorate your bedroom like a coffee house?

I took a look when you were away.

I told Selim, “Perhaps they’re going to...”

“...play cards at night, husband and wife!” I lost my nerve.

It’s disgusting!

Oh, you don’t mind me darling, do you?

I’m just blurting out of my mouth whatever comes to my mind.

I can’t help it.

It never shuts up.

My dear one! My cute loser.

Who’s that?

Girl!

You got lost in thoughts again, baby cow!

You fell in love with my apartment, didn’t you?

In fact, it’s not really my style.

It strains the eyes. All the gold...

Come here.

I underestimated how ugly you are this morning.

By the way...

...Hollywood?

No chance!

Follow me, little duckling.

“Little duckling...”

Guess whose husband he is

He’s my husband

My breadwinner, the owner of my heart

My sweetheart

This is so silly.

-Have you woken up, darling? -Darling...

I have. Good morning, but...

...I wish you woke me up. I could’ve prepared breakfast.

No, you beat someone in your dream all night.

I thought you couldn’t sleep well. I’ll eat at work.

-I’ll see you off. -Okay.

-I’m coming. -Okay.

-Fatih... -Goodbye.

You should open this...

-Open it... -Kiss me.

My sweetheart...

-Brother! -Oh boy. We’re opposite neighbors!

-Fatih! -Co-sis!

-Good morning! -It’s great.

Good morning.

It’s too early for photos...

Oh, don’t get hung up. It’s God’s will. Everything on that face is so big!

You’re newly married, so I’m sure your wife made you a great breakfast, but...

...take this hot pastry I made. You can eat it on your way.

It’s hand-rolled.

You’re a real sultan! I didn’t have breakfast.

Would you like one, dear?

-Thank you, darling. -It’s hand-rolled. Have one for breakfast.

No Fatih, thank you.

-Have one, Gizem. -No, thank you.

No breakfast for you.

Okay.

-Let me know when you go to the school. -Okay.

-What school? -Kindergarten.

Oh, great.

-Thank you. -She’s applying to the kindergarten down the street.

-Good. -Bye.

-See you. -Selim, wait.

-Yes, baby? -I dress him up, you know.

Don’t get too sweaty.

Fatoş!

If your company doesn’t give you a new car, your brother should get one from our dealership.

No, there’s no need for that. We’re fine.

But she’s a new bride. She’ll envy us.

No, I won’t envy you at all.

-She’ll envy us. -No, I won’t envy you.

-She’ll envy us. -No, I won’t envy you at all.

-You’ll envy! -I won’t envy!

You’ll envy!

They’re joking...

-See you. -You’ll envy!

-I won’t! -You’ll envy us sooner or later!

-I won’t! -Yours is a four-door. Terrible.

-Football game today? -It would be great, but...

...I shouldn’t leave her alone at home on the first night.

Come on, you’re being so henpecked!

Sultan will be like a sister, a mother to her. She’ll take care of her.

-Right? -Don’t be so henpecked from day one.

-Brother... -I’ll beat you with my belly! Be like your brother.

Wait, stop!

We’ve arrived. Grow up!

So where are you going now?

I have a job interview now. And then I’ll go shopping.

“Job interview now… Shopping…”

You’re such a loudmouth. Everything about you is weird.

-“Weird...” -Why the job interview?

Because I don’t like sitting at home doing nothing.

You don’t have to sit doing nothing.

There’s a lot to do.

Do your hair. Put on make-up. Polish your nails, wipe them. Polish again, wipe again.

Put on a face mask. Cinnamon. Avocado.

Photoshop your photos for Instagram.

I don’t know, decorate. Cook. Watch TV.

Lots of stuff to do.

-Okay. There is. -Wait.

There was the daughter of a relative of ours.

She wasn’t like you. She was a young girl, full of life.

Right.

As soon as they got married, they got divorced! Poor girl, she was devastated.

-So? -It just crossed my mind.

Bye to you!

Sweetie, I was just about to call you. You won’t believe what happened this morning.

Gizem?

What happened? Is something wrong?

Hande, this woman is driving me mad!

This new bride is so full of envy!

She takes jabs at me all the time. She belittles me.

So?

So? “This neighborhood is a slum”, she says.

“You’ve gotten used to this place”, she says. I offer to take her to the hairdresser’s.

I’m trying to help her out, you know.

“I’m not talking to those bitches”, she says.

-No way. -Who does she mean?

I don’t know, she means you, and you.

And you.

Come on, a barking dog never bites.

No.

But don’t let her belittle you all the time.

I don’t know, Hande. I can barely restrain myself.

I try not to dwell on it. I treat her like she’s my big sister, but no.

I say, “My dear...” I say that out of respect.

“The vendors are very good. They’ll protect you.”

She says, “To hell with them!”

What a loudmouth!

Have a nice day.

She’s the devil!

She keeps messing with me. I just don’t understand.

Give me a minute. I’m going out.

I wouldn’t talk to her for a minute, if not for Fatih.

I keep asking her, “Do you need anything?”

I tell her, “The vendors are good. They’ll help you out.”

She says, “I won’t talk to those fools!”

-Tell her to mind her own business! -New bride!

I’m so unlucky.

You were going to apply for that job at the kindergarten?

I’m going there for the interview now.

I don’t know, perhaps working will relieve me a bit.

I’ll make some friends.

I say, “You’ll make great friends here.” She says, “To hell with them!”

Are you serious, Ms. Sultan?

No way.

Just a minute.

Look, this is my co-sister...

Okay, I’ll think positive.

I’m there!

I’m so excited! I’m hanging up, dear.

Yes, I’ll let you know. Bye.

New bride!

My mother!

Did you miss your one and only daughter-in-law?

I’ve just finished these baby shoes. Take them.

Mom, stop weaving those. I’ve got eighty pairs at home.

You know, Gizem sent me.

She invites us for dinner tonight. She insists.

She says she wants to host us.

No. She’s still a new bride. Let her rest for a while.

I told her. I said, “It’s alright. Have some rest. It’s too early.”

She said no. She insisted. Poor girl, I guess she’s envious.

Perhaps it’s because she saw that marvelous, incredible...

...table I served, which got thousands of shares on social media...

-Right. -Poor girl.

Okay, then. We’ll visit them tonight.

Okay, so see you at night.

See you.

Mom, wait.

Come here.

I love you.

I’m the one that made you a mother-in-law. Don’t forget that.

-I know. -Okay.

I want a grandchild!

We’ll talk later.

-New bride! -What’s going on?

New bride!

New bride!

New bride!

New bride!

New bride! New bride! New bride!

Isn’t that Melahat’s new daughter-in-law?

Here you go.

-Are they heavy? -No.

She badmouthed me to everyone!

Oh, I’m having such fun now!

Co-sis!

I was thinking, maybe we should have dinner at your place tonight.

Today isn’t a good day for me.

Oh, okay. I told mom, “She won’t want it.”

Whom? Mom?

Mom sent me. “Let’s have dinner at Gizem’s”, she said.

I actually told her, “Mom...”

“Her apartment must be a mess.”

“Her place is like a coffee house. They’re playing cards all day”, I said.

“And she’s not a good cook like me!”

-“She knows nothing about serving!” -No. You shouldn’t have said that.

You can come, of course. Especially if mom wants to...

-...I’d love to host you. -So we’re coming tonight.

-Okay. -You’re sure?

I am.

Bye to you, and good luck!

Wait a minute.

There was this neighbor...

...of one of our relatives.

She wasn’t like you. She was such a practical girl.

They were newly married and she had a fight with her mother-in-law. They got divorced right away!

It just crossed my mind.

I’m calm.

I’m calm.

I don’t want to drown my co-sister in a pool of acid.

No.

Because I’m a mature person.

Now I’ll prepare a nice dinner.

Let’s go.

Okay. Great.

I’ll go shopping.

I’ll go shopping.

What’s wrong? The fridge is empty?

Poor girl!

Mr. Courier!

-Yes? -Could you come downstairs quietly?

I’m coming.

Sssh! Don’t move!

Don’t move!

What’s going on?

Could you just speak...

...with your mouth, without moving?

I don’t want the lights to come on.

Why don’t you want that?

Well...

Our opposite neighbor is a crazy woman.

-Oh. -She bites strangers!

She bites?

She does. It’s terrible. We don’t know why.

-She makes these big wounds. -Goodness!

-Let’s get this done quietly. -Okay.

-Make sure the lights don’t come on. -Okay.

Please.

-Keep it steady. -Okay, okay…

Okay…

-Can you pay contactless? -Whatever, just take it!

-Done? -It’s done.

-Okay, keep the receipt. Give it to me. -Take it.

Oh, did you order food?

Run! Save yourself!

Whoa! Go away!

Just you wait!

I know how to put you to shame!

Chubby face!

Okay.

Very good.

Perfect.

#newbridesraiseyourhand

What am I doing?

I’m really losing it.

It’s all good.

My God...

Gizem...

This dinner is...

Really...

You know what? It’s delicious.

I’m not going to lie, darling.

I had no idea you were such a good cook.

It tasted like restaurant food to me.

Rather than home-cooked.

-She’s kidding. -Mom and dad are getting used to my delicious dishes.

They must have found this strange.

No. Thank you, dear. It was great.

Enjoy it, mom.

-Dad wants the salt. -No, not the salt.

“I love meat dishes. It’s hard to get them right. You got it just right.”

What else did you say?

He says, “The amount of tomato paste was great too.”

-Well done, dear. -I’m delighted.

It’s good to know you enjoyed it, but...

...there’s something I have to tell you.

-Now... -Say it, girl. Please say it.

Tell them you ordered the food. Don’t be shy. Tell them you can’t cook.

“I’m just an inept person. That’s how I was created.”

It’s alright. For God’s sake, confess.

Please, say it.

For God’s sake, say it.

No.

Did I put too little salt? Mom, was the salt enough?

No, the salt was fine.

It was great, salt and all.

You know what?

It was one of the best meat dishes I’ve ever eaten.

-Exactly. I agree. -Right?

-I agree. -It was great.

Golden ratio. Golden ratio!

At this age, I still can’t cook such great meat.

And that rice makes you lick your fingers!

-Are you full? -I’ve had enough! I had three plates.

I don’t think you’re full. Let me serve you the sixth plate.

-The rice was so smooth. -Shut up, mom.

-Bravo! -Really. Did you use butter?

Of course, butter.

-Sultan, what do you think? -It’s not like I use machine oil!

-It’s all with butter. -Bravo!

We shouldn’t talk about this now. Let’s set aside a whole day to talk about it.

We’ve grown tired of orzo all these years.

-Great. -This is a whole new thing in our lives.

But mom is a great cook too.

-I like it, though. -I should go to the bathroom.

-This butter smell is disgusting. -How did you whip the carrots?

I first chopped the carrots...

I’ll tell you in a moment, mom. I’ll be right back.

-Sultan. -Yes?

This is the kitchen. The bathroom is over there.

Oh, I was confused. They look similar.

Is this where the toilet is in your apartment?

Stop faking it! Where did you hide the packaging?

Tell me. I won’t spit too much, I promise.

Just a little. Just like...

-...that! -What packaging? Don’t say that.

That’s uncalled for.

You think you’re smart, right?

You think you can fool me with your little brains, chubby face?

I’ll find it and put you to shame before your husband and his parents, silly girl!

Mom!

Selim!

Oh! Didn’t I imagine that?

That was quite a fall!

-She flew! -Are you alright?

-What’s going on? -The rug slipped and she fell.

Get up.

-Oh... -I fell.

-She fell. -That rug slips...

-You should take care of that... -It hurt a lot.

-Does it hurt? Are you hurt? Come here... -She fell so bad!

-Take me home. -Okay, let’s go.

-It was the rug. It slipped and she fell. -Thank you for everything.

-Give me those slippers. -You should fix it. I could’ve fallen too.

-Oh, you won’t fall, mom. -Fix that.

Hamdullah, come here! You’re still stuffing food in your mouth!

Give me the slippers. Poor girl, she was floored.

Dad, everyone’s leaving.

Guess whose husband he is

He’s my husband

My breadwinner, the owner of my heart

My sweetheart

-What’s going on? -What? Everyone does it.

-Everyone? Who? -Well, just everyone.

Okay.

-See you. -Are you going?

-To mom’s? -Yes, I’m going there.

See you, loverboy.

-Don’t make me divorce you. -Okay, I’m shutting up.

-I love you. -I love you too.

-Goodbye, love bug. -Bye.

Guess whose husband he is

He’s my husband

My breadwi—

What’s up? The pajamas are gone.

They’re gone. You can have them for the night.

I wear satin ones. The cheap fabric irritates me.

You know what irritates me? These silly things.

Oh, I’m itching!

I hate that.

Hey, look!

Behave yourself, will you? Stop pursing your lips!

-Mom! -Mo--

-Good morning. -Good morning.

I love this apartment! So beautiful, so spacious.

Mom, your first daughter-in-law missed you so much!

-Come on. -So nice. So beautiful, spacious.

Look, I made these for you.

-Are these for me? -For the baby, hopefully.

Thank you very much. They’re beautiful.

Your new daughter-in-law loves you.

I love you too.

-Look at her beauty! -Mom, the door.

-She’s so cute, isn’t she? -The door!

They’re so nice.

-You’re here. -Hello.

Hello.

-Hi Gizem. -Hi.

We kiss three times.

Sorry, I couldn’t come to your wedding or to congratulate you.

That’s alright.

In Germany they kiss...

...three times.

They were in Germany. They go there in her son’s school holidays.

-Yes, I work there. -And she teaches private German lessons.

-Yes. -I’m pleased to meet you.

Hülya is like a big sister to me.

She likes me a lot. I like her a lot too.

We’re besties, aren’t we?

-We really love our neighbors. -That’s nice.

-Let’s go upstairs for breakfast. -Let’s go.

That looks delicious. Is that pancake?

-Mom? -Yes, dear?

-You forgot the pastry. -She put chocolate on it too!

-Do you like it? -Look at that!

You forgot the most important one, mom!

That’s alright, I got it. I’ve got the pastry.

I’ve got it, mom...

You look tired, bestie.

A bit...

Me too. There’s no end to women’s suffering...

I got up...

...and there was a slight wrinkle on my hair.

I got obsessed. I started oiling it.

As I oiled it...

...I noticed my nail varnish wore off.

I refreshed it right away.

Now I had to do it for my feet too. And that gave me such a backache.

Me, I woke up in the crack of dawn. My child was ill. I treated his fever.

I bathed him. I washed and ironed his school clothes for the week.

I prepared for the school week. You know, I work on weekdays.

I vacuumed. I cooked the week’s dishes.

Then the sink pipe burst. I fixed it.

Then I remembered Melahat had invited me for breakfast.

I made German cake just to bring something, and here I am.

You must be exhausted.

Enjoy your tea.

Hülya, I guess you’re not married?

No, I divorced the guy.

-I’m sorry. -I’m not. It’s a relief.

He didn’t work, and didn’t want to. I got rid of him.

He lives in Germany now. I don’t care what he does.

I’m very happy with my child.

Is it a boy or a girl?

-A boy. -His name?

-Berk. -My dear. How old is he?

-Nine. -Nine. So he’s in fourth grade.

-Wonderful. -What a phony!

Hülya, I want a grandchild.

Songül’s second one is already growing teeth.

I’ll have a child, but...

...I lost a lot of weight. My clothes fit me so well.

And I don’t mean to brag, but my butt is so tight.

I postponed it, obviously, since if I give birth now, it will turn to rubber.

And you, Gizem?

I’ll get a job first. You know, it’s hard to get a good job these days.

And...

...I don’t like sitting at home like an idiot.

I have so many followers, you know.

It would be hard to go to Dubai and so on with a child.

But you don’t have so many views.

I get a huge number of views.

No. My wedding clip got three times as yours.

They must’ve watched it as comedy!

And yours as horror!

Horror...

Melahat, your daughters-in-law get along so well.

They do. It’s great watching them talk.

Oh, the chandelier’s stone fell again.

Your father will fix it when he comes home.

No, mom. I’ll fix it in a minute now.

No, I’ll fix it. Please.

You sit down. You’ve only just fallen.

I’m the first bride! Let me.

I’m the new bride! You let me.

Oh, they’re so sweet.

Watch out. You might fall.

Who are you talking to, loudmouth!

Hey!

Watch your mouth!

Hülya.

I’m so tired, Hülya. It’s a big apartment. Too much housework.

Why don’t you move into the house you bought in Ayvalık?

Why live here in a two-floor apartment? Going up and down the stairs...

-We’ll move soon. -Let me!

And we’ll give this apartment to whoever has the first baby!

Don’t even think of it. I deserve the big apartment!

Do you think I’d have a baby just to get an apartment?

-That’s silly. -You can’t anyway.

-You’re a loser. You can’t do it. -I can’t do it?

-Yes. -I’ll do it, just out of spite!

-I’ll have the baby just to spite you! -Come on!

Let’s see you. Don’t hold my hand!

-Stop it! -Come on! Come on!

-I’ll take off my slippers! -No!

-I will! -Get out of here!

-Let me go! -Don’t touch that!

-Don’t make me angry! -Don’t touch it!

Mom!

My God!

-Shall I break them up? -No. They always play like that.

Mom, we’re alright.

That stone is mine!

-Should we break them up -No, they’re just playing!

We’re alright, mom!

Hülya, are they serious?

-You’re way over the line! -Stop it! Get off me!

I’m going to give you a good beating.

No room for brotherhood here, Selim!

Let’s see, Sultan.

Let’s see if I can have that baby.

That rug slips, dear. Be careful.

Darling, I wasn’t going to play this, but Selim insists.

It’s alright, baby.

The armchair is comfortable, isn’t it? It’s a good one.

Darling?

Darling, what is it?

Nothing.

Did you put on a red lipstick?

Yes. So what?

I don’t know.

Why put that on so late at night? Are you a little silly or what?

Perhaps I am.

Oh well.

Is it too hot?

No.

But there are things here that make me sweat.

You’re not wearing such warm clothes either.

Why did you bite that now?

When my eyes meet yours...

...I get this warm feeling inside. Do you know why?

Are you angry at me for playing games?

No.

Let’s say I get hot for you.

I love this silliness of yours.

Thank you.

Shall we have a baby?

-Of course. -Right now.

Right now? That will be hard.

Wow?

Selim, it’s time you understood!

What are you after?

You know what?

That might be one of the most...

...impressive moves I’ve seen recently.

Here?

In the bedroom.

No, here.

But you didn’t want a baby. You wanted to get a job first.

No, no.

-I want a baby! -You want one?

I want to reproduce with you as soon as possible!

Reproduce... What kind of wording is that?

-Let’s reproduce! -What are you talking about?

-Gizem, where do you find those words? -Ssssh!

-Wait. I’ll turn off the lights. -Gizem, I’m getting nervous.

Darling!

Gizem, what are you doing?

I feel like my brother is watching!

I’m getting nervous here.

Shoulder. My shoulder...

Sorry, madam.

Watch out!

You jerked my brain.

Thank you.

-Come again. -Of course... It’s for my... Friend...

Have a nice day.

Goodbye.

What are you doing here?

-I was at the pharmacy. -Oh?

I ran out of toothpaste. Where are you going?

To the pharmacy.

To buy what? A pregnancy test?

No... Mouthwash...

Your necklace is off to the side.

Well, perhaps to get the apartment, you...

Oh, your lipstick has run.

You know...

...perhaps you’ve started working on that baby.

That happens, right?

I don’t get in such cheap contests, sweetie.

Because I’m not you.

Okay, Sultan. See you.

See you!

What a phony!

Oh, the wind...

Ms. Sultan!

-How are you? -Fine, the usual... But...

...the weather is a bit strange. It affects one, you know...

This unpredictable weather...

...makes one crazy, right?

Right. It affects us all.

Of course. There are no sane people left around!

-That’s a fact. -Right. None.

I was wondering if you had...

...those tests...

An antidepressant?

Poor woman...

Why are you staring at me?

Is it something on my face? On my teeth?

My co-sister did it!

My filthy co-sister did it! She played with my lipstick!

We came across right over there.

Look, she’s there! You see her? She’s looking at me! You see her?

That’s her!

I see. I’m sure she’s there.

I’ll show you!

I’ll show you!

I’ll show you!

What?

Oh, yes, mom! My dear mom...

Tonight? Okay. Who?

Oh, Hayriye. Okay.

Okay, mom. So we’re coming tonight.

No, it’s just too windy. It made me anxious.

Wait, don’t hang up.

You know Auntie Hayriye’s grandson?

The kid who got on the news.

What was his name? Hüseyin...

Tell her to bring him. We’ll cuddle him. And...

...Gizem studied child development, you know.

She’ll like him.

Look at him, so sweet!

-Look! -What a sweetie.

Watch out, dear.

-Such an active boy. -He doesn’t sit still.

He keeps moving.

-What's his name? -Hüseyin Can Rıza.

-Hüseyin Can Rıza. -Can Rıza.

Hüseyin Can!

Why don’t you sit down for a minute?

-Come here. -Catch your breath.

-Fatih! -He’s soaked with sweat.

He’s like a bullet. We saw him on the news. He was great.

Watch out, dear.

You’re so sweet. Sit down and let us cuddle you.

Come here. Let me cuddle you.

Come on, Hüseyin Can. She’ll cuddle you. Go sit next to her.

-Sit down, my dear. You’re sweaty. -Come here.

You’re making my head spin!

-How old is he? -He’s about to turn eight.

Oh, he’s grown up. He looks younger.

-Watch out, dear! -Watch out!

-What are you doing! -Oh please, put that down! Put it down!

-Okay, don’t push him. -Don’t make me get up!

-That’s a valuable vase. -Fatih, it’s alright!

-Hold it from the bottom! -Don’t push him!

Hüseyin, can you give me that, dear? Come on.

Come on.

Perhaps you should stay away from him.

Look how he’s staring at you. He likes you.

Well done. Well done, my boy.

-Good! -Great!

That’s what you get when you talk to children.

You have to talk to them. It really matters a lot.

-Let her go! -He’s joking.

-Let it go! -It’s a joke, Fatih.

Don’t worry. Let me go!

Let me go.

-She was trained for this. -Let my hair go! Let it go!

Gizem studied child development.

Let her go.

-Stop it! Let her go. -I’m getting nervous here.

Good boy. Good.

Don’t worry, it’s alright. He’s curious.

I studied child development, so I know.

-Of course. -He needs to be curious, notice, get excited.

It’s all very important.

What are you doing!

Don’t stare at me like that!

Don’t look at me like that!

Fatih, let me go! Who do you think you are?

Who are you to hit me!

My co-sister is getting beaten by a child, live!

Brother, wait. Don’t do that.

-Let me go! -Please go to your room.

I’ll hit him too!

Sultan, what are you doing!

I’ll beat you!

You can’t do that to me!

Darling, please.

She got the beating and left...

Who’s that little boy who beat my beautiful wife?

Did he beat you like “thump thump thump”?

Fatih, you’re not funny at all.

I like kids a lot. How come I got so angry?

It’s alright. Don’t worry.

This kid hit his uncle with a crowbar. He was on the news!

-What? -With a crowbar.

This kid got on the news, and you didn’t tell me?

Everyone knows the kid. He went viral.

You search for “kid” and “crowbar” and he comes up!

Sultan said she warned you.

When he came right at you...

Right. Of course.

Sultan told me. I forgot.

Don’t worry. That kid deserved being yelled at.

It’s not his fault, Fatih.

-Whose fault is it? -His parents’.

And of everyone who applauds him when he acts like that.

Including you.

What did I do?

Fatih, I’m too angry now. Let’s not talk.

I don’t want to speak a word. Darling, I...

And you say you want a baby!

I don’t want a baby! It’s over! It didn’t work out anyway.

What do you mean it didn’t work out? We can have one...

Don’t say that, Fatih. It seems I’m not ready.

I’ll focus on work.

Let me get that right first.

I don’t want a baby.

-Okay. -I don’t.

Okay.

Can you bring me some water?

-I don’t want a baby. -Okay.

My husband! I love you!

My husband!

What are you doing!

Selim, you came out so early!

Sultan, are you alright?

There was a mosquito behind the bed!

A mosquito?

Were you calling the mosquito “my husband”?

No, Selim.

I was saying, “Mosquito, I hate you!”

“Mosquito, I hate you”?

Yes.

They bite us at night, you know.

-Oh darling. -It’s somewhere over there.

Goodness...

Anyway.

Sssh!

-Yes? -You won’t sleep right away, will you?

I thought it was time to sleep, Sultan.

Don’t sleep. Let’s fool around a little.

Fool around?

We did enough fooling around before I went to work, so...

But you’re my little fool.

Well, right, I’m your fool.

I’m your fool, but...

Come on, fool around with me.

This isn’t a water fountain, Sultan!

Oh!

What?

I’m a little cold.

I’ll warm you up.

You know...

Turn on the fountain!

Are they fighting over there?

Well, I hope so.

Why?

God forbid.

There we go.

Good night.

-Is something wrong? -No.

It’s a little hot.

We should get an air conditioner.

Anyway.

I changed my mind.

-Let’s reproduce! -What?

Okay.

HIGH CHANCE OF PREGNANCY

“Wow?”

MY LOVE VIDEO CALL

Gizem?

Don’t look. Don’t look!

COME HOME EARLY

Yes!

-Let’s play. -We’re not children!

-It’s going to be great. -We’ll have fun. We always play this game.

-Gizem, come on. -Come on, it’s your turn.

-Me? Shall I start? -Start, brother.

-I’m putting them on. -Yes.

-Here comes the music. -Bring it on.

But that’s easy. He’ll get it right away.

You hear me?

-Mom always says, “Fatih, I like you more!” -What?

Okay, okay.

Bring it on, Sultan.

“A-part-ment”.

“Compartment!”

-No. -It’s easy.

-Too easy. -No, that’s wrong.

-What? -Wrong. Put them on.

Look at me. “Apartment”.

“Department”.

“A-part-ment”!

-“A-” -“La-”

-“Part-”. -“Laporte”!

He said “Laporte”!

“A-part-ment”!

-“Lapor”! -Take them off!

“Apartment”!

-Why can’t you get it? -You should’ve said “apartment” then!

-Read my lips! -You didn’t say “apartment”!

-Too slow. -It’s our turn.

-Our turn? -No, it’s our turn. Me and your dad.

-Mom! -Wow, mom wants to play.

-She wants to play too. -Hamdullah, come here.

-Dad! -Dad, come.

You opened your mouth too wide...

Dad, put on the headphones.

-You’ll hear music, dad. -Here comes the music.

-You hear the music? -Is it on?

-It’s on. -Okay.

Look at my mouth.

Triphone.

Triphone.

That was great.

-How did you get it? -Wow.

-Miraculous. -That’s your dad!

-Watch your dad. -That deserves respect.

-Our turn. -I’m putting them on.

-Here comes the music. -Yes.

First word. Oh well…

You’re becoming a father!

-What? -“Coming mother”?

You’re becoming a father!

“Incoming bother”?

No. “You’re becoming...”

“Incoming...”

-...a father! -I’m becoming something.

-See, it’s happening already. -No, not that!

“You’re becoming a father!”

-“Becoming a father?” -Yes! You’re becoming a father!

“You’re becoming a father!”

“You’re becoming a father!”

I’m becoming a father!

-I’m becoming a father! -My dear!

I’m becoming a father!

Dad, I’m becoming a father! What do you say?

You’re becoming a grandfather!

Oh, you...

Congratulations, folks!

-Let’s take a photo. -Sultan, can you take our photo?

-Take it in landscape. -One more, please.

Another one for the story, baby. In portrait.

Let’s point to the belly.

It’s done.

Okay.

I guess I closed my eyes. Can you take another?

Show the belly.

My God...

Miracle herbal formulas for pregnancy by Prof. M. Tuncer

-Hello. -Welcome, madam.

Doll fringes, lion claws, shepherd bags.

Oh, I’m out of shepherd bags.

Oh, wait a minute.

So, give me wolf screams.

I’ve never heard of that. What a silly plant name!

Like the others made any sense! I read it all on the internet!

I’ll take a look, then.

Oh, co-sis! What are you doing here?

Oh, I... I came to buy spices. You?

Me and mom are buying dried fruits for the baby.

I’m pregnant, you know.

Come here.

I love you.

Mom, don’t.

Me too.

Me too.

Mom... My lovely... My one and only...

Sultan...

Here are the lion claws and the doll fringes.

What are those?

Well, I had only asked for cinnamon!

Cinnamon? I’ll give you cinnamon too.

Perhaps you should get some hyena shells too!

Mom, I made a joke! So funny!

This baby is really making me a joker!

Let’s go! My dear mom...

I should climb carefully, since I’m pregnant.

We don’t want to hurt the baby.

I could barely climb, you know?

I put in the cinnamon.

I guess that’s all?

Let me have that. Thank you. Here.

What kind of music is that, at a herbalist!

Why the love songs? Who are you in love with? You broke up with the palm?

You fell in love with the dried apricots or what?

BABY CUCUMBERS BABY POTATOES

What?

No, she’s not pregnant.

SHE’S NOT PREGNANT!

She’s not pregnant! She’s not pregnant!

She’s not pregnant! She’s not pregnant!

The spices are of no use...

“Rolling a young boy in bed is a good method for pregnancy...”

This is stupid!

Hello.

Bestie!

What are you doing there, mother and son? You’re so cute!

You know, I read this on the internet.

It says... You know, it’s a superstition...

If you roll a boy in your bed...

...that makes your husband earn more money.

So I told Selim...

...we should find a boy and just roll him in our bed.

It might bring plentitude, you know.

You need a boy to roll in your bed?

Well, if he wants to.

Berk, would you like to roll in Sultan and Selim’s bed?

No.

What a cute “No”!

No.

You cutie!

Well, it’s not like I believed that.

I just read it on the internet.

Have a nice day.

That didn’t work either.

Walk around your husband three times. Make eye contact every time...

...and say “Peace be with you”.

THE SALUTATION RITUAL

Who believes this stuff?

No way.

I’m hungry.

Enjoy your meal, love.

Thank you, love.

Oh, my wife made me potato salad too.

Peace be with you.

Peace be upon you...

Peace be with you.

Peace be upon you...

Peace be with you.

I seek refuge in God from the accursed Satan!

No, no!

-In the name of God... -Selim, no! It’s alright...

-Stay away from me! -No, no…

-Sultan, stay away! -Don’t panic.

My dear wife...

But sweetie, what’s the use of all this stuff?

Why did you throw a salt shaker at my head, Selim?

I was so scared.

I thought something got into you. A demon or something.

You know...

...you kept walking around the table. You stopped and said, “Peace be with you”.

You looked at me and did it again.

I said “Peace be upon you”, and you paid no attention.

You just kept walking around. I was scared.

Enough, Selim!

I read that on the internet!

Perhaps we shouldn’t hurry, my love.

Right? Let the baby come when it wants to.

Let it pick the right time.

And say hello to us when it comes.

You’ve been watching those TV shows again!

And you’re only just beginning to overcome your fears.

For God’s sake, don’t go into that!

Anyway.

I’ll brush my teeth.

You talk too slow, Selim. Talk faster.

I’ll brush my teeth. And you warm up your feet.

“Let’s not hurry, my love!”

I’ll see you when she shoots out the baby!

Are you crazy? Why did you get me a ring, darling?

And it’s diamond!

My husband!

My dear! This is unbelievable!

Fatih, don’t insist! This ring is too big! I can’t wear it on the street!

Please don’t insist! No! Stop!

Are you alright?

What is it?

The hormones?

Well...

Me and Sultan, we were joking. It’s a little thing between us. Like a game.

-But you’re getting along fine, aren’t you? -Of course. She’s my co-sis!

Don’t talk like that, dumpling.

Okay.

My lawyer will call you tomorrow.

Can you bring us some water?

Of course.

-Take care. -Okay.

Kiss my forehead!

-I said kiss my forehead! -Why?

-Don’t sweat, okay? -No, it’s cold anyway.

Okay. And eat all of this.

Okay.

-Good morning. -Good morning.

-Would you like some? -No, thank you.

-Sultan? -No.

-But it’s hand-rolled. -I don’t want it.

-Have a nice day. -Have a nice day.

Have a nice day at work, daddy!

My baby...

I love you.

I love you too.

Sultan, wait a minute.

Our neighbor in Rize had a daughter-in-law.

She wasn’t like you. She was so full of life.

She failed to give her mother-in-law a grandchild. And they got divorced right away!

So?

It just crossed my mind.

So, bye to you!

If Sultan told me she was pregnant, I’d go crazy.

-So crazy I’d eat this elevator! -That will happen soon, hopefully.

You know what?

She’s beginning to get rid of her fear.

-Really? -Yes. She no longer says “The same will happen.”

You know, now that Gizem is pregnant...

...they’ll spend this period together. Her fears will go away for good.

I hope so.

After you...

The ball is in the penalty box…

The final seconds.

The referee checks his watch.

An attack… Quaresma! It’s a goal!

It’s a goal! Here he is!

It’s not over before he says it’s over!

He nails it to the corner! What a great goal!

Perfect! What a great shot!

Look. It’s for your baby.

It’s beautiful, mom!

-My daughter... -My mom...

-That was an incredible goal… -Yes?

Everyone is celebrating.

Your father says, “Turn down the TV! We’re not deaf, are we?”

Turn it down.

-I’m turning it down. -Okay.

-He’s getting angry. -I can’t get up. The remote is there.

Okay, okay. I’m turning it down.

A great goal. Everyone on the sidelines...

What’s going on?

For God’s sake, what is this?

-What’s going on? -Sultan, what is this?

What’s happening here?

Look, that’s a boy, and that’s a girl.

They’re bending and twisting!

To entertain us...

She’s giving us a laugh.

She’s playing music on her phone.

Oh my God...

What? Who?

-Does that read “Pregnant”? -Preg...

-Pregnant! -She’s pregnant!

Preg-nant! She’s pregnant!

Sultan, are you pregnant?

-Oh God! -You’re pregnant?

-She’s pregnant! She really is! -My dear one! You’re pregnant?

-Congratulations! -Sultan!

Oh God!

-Brother, I’m so happy for you! -I’m becoming a father!

-Quick, a photo. -Photo!

Let’s take a family photo.

-Come on. -I can’t.

-Take our photo. -I can’t.

Come on, take it. Altogether.

I don’t know how to unlock this.

A photo with our baby! You too, come here.

-I can’t believe it! -Point there!

Let’s say “God bless”.

God bless!

-Okay, done. -Landscape.

Take another in landscape.

I hope I’m not taking your time?

No, I only taught three private lessons today. And now I’m shoveling snow with joy!

Oh, good.

You know...

I’m four weeks pregnant now.

-Yes. -Gizem was four weeks pregnant when she learned it.

-So she’s eight weeks now. -Great.

So, according to my calculations, there’s four weeks, or a month between us.

For me to give birth first, I need to have a girl.

Because girls are born earlier, as everybody knows.

If Gizem’s is a boy, he’ll be late. And I can give birth before her.

Why don’t you both give birth in good time?

I’m the first bride!

And I’ll give birth to the first grandchild. And get my parents’ apartment.

I can’t live in a two-room apartment when my co-sister lives in that huge one!

Am I wrong?

Now obviously, I’m giving birth first.

Mine will be the first grandchild.

Right?

When did you give birth?

My son was born right on the expected day.

Good. For a moment, I thought...

-Okay. So I’ll go now. -Go.

#hatersgonnahate #mybabywillbefirst

I’m Dr. Serkan Cansevdi.

In the long and arduous journey of life...

...every baby deserves to be off to a good start.

For 100K likes...

...choose the Cansevdi Clinic.

Cansevdi: Because life is worth it.

Madam, you really shouldn’t wait.

I’ll try my luck. I’m his fan. Maybe...

He won’t see you. We don’t accept patients without an appointment.

I’m coming from so far away. And I’m carrying two lives! Look!

Okay, so I’ll wait.

My dear...

Hello.

I’m nine weeks pregnant. I tried to make an appointment, but I was told there were no slots.

Yes, I told you.

Why don’t I talk to the doctor? I’m sure he’ll want to examine me when he sees me.

Mr. Doctor doesn’t get patients based on appearance. He has a busy schedule.

He has a birth performance coming. And he’ll go to Dubai on a delivery tour.

Okay.

But I think I’ll wait.

-Okay! -Girl!

I’ve had enough! You imitate everything I do!

Why would I imitate you? I’m a fan of the doctor myself!

They have no slots. Why would they get you?

I’m sure they won’t get you!

“They won’t get you!”

Look, stop imitating me! Don’t make me get mad here!

Oh, there he is!

We’re your fans! We love you!

He’s here! He’s here!

I can’t believe it!

He’s so cute! Look, he’s really here!

-You’re so sweet. I’m a huge fan... -My baby!

-I love you. I adore you... -I love you so much. I’m your fan. Please...

-I love you! -We got pregnant at the same time.

We’re sisters.

You’re sisters?

Yes.

She’s my big sister.

No, there’s only a couple of years between us. I look younger.

Stop that.

That will get attention on social media.

Yes.

- Come in, you two. Quick. -Yes. Yes.

You see? You see?

Quick!

-I touched him! -He’s so cute!

Our husbands aren’t here.

That’s alright...

Let’s see where the baby is...

Here she is.

Let’s listen to the heart.

There’s some time between the two...

-Yes. -No.

Just a bit.

-Come here. Let’s check you too. -I’m coming.

Mine will catch up. It’s big.

Girls, post lots of photos on Instagram.

Hashtag #sistersgivebirthtogether...

...at Cansevdi.

The big baby arrives, at Cansevdi.

-At Cansevdi. -At Cansevdi.

Look at that.

Fatih, my baby is two millimeters tall.

Right, brother.

And mine is ten millimeters. He looks just like me.

How come? He’s only ten millimeters tall!

I look at him upright and he looks tall just like me!

Turn it sideways and he’ll look like his uncle!

He looks like you!

You’re really something.

-Look at that... -Sultan...

Why didn’t you wait for me today?

Selim, the doctor is too popular. He had no time. We told him we were sisters.

You’re like sisters anyway.

-No, of course. -Of course, but...

-Not exactly. It was a kind of joke... -We just pretended...

-You see, just like... -I mean, we’re a family after all, but...

-We just pretended... -But I wish I was there. You know why?

But Selim, you know what the doctor said? He said, “This baby is so big!”

“It’s such a big one. It’s already catching up”, he said.

-That’s my baby! -No, wait.

When did he say that? I didn’t hear that.

You didn’t. I said, “Doctor, we’re both tall parents...”

-Wait a minute. Fatih! -Yes, dear?

You know what he said about ours? Ours will be a very active baby.

And he said, “This will be a smart kid.”

Really?

-And the baby kicked when I was there! -Really?

-It was a punch, not a kick! -Kicking and punching? What a baby!

Kick? How come it kicked?

Mom, did you hear that? The baby is kicking already.

I’m sure they it have...

But mom, you know what the doctor said?

“I think you’ll give this family the first grandchild!”

-The hormones. -It’s the hormones.

What if it’s one boy and one girl?

I’d love it. It would be a nice mix.

-Mom, dad is saying something. -What?

What matters is that they’re healthy...

He says, “What matters is that they’re healthy...”

He said that himself.

I love that room. It’s so calm. Look at that.

We have so many empty rooms here. You can raise your babies here.

Yes, that would be great.

All I want is a healthy baby. I want nothing else, mom.

Let’s hope so...

Mom, you have to see Selim. He’s so emotional these days.

And I had this dream the other day. You know, pregnant women’s dreams come true.

I enter the living room. Selim is sitting alone.

“What’s up? You never read”, I say.

He never reads.

He suddenly stands up. He throws the book.

I say “Ah!”

And he’s wearing...

...you know the garments Arabs wear? Something like that.

He comes flying...

...towards me in awe.

He looks ecstatic.

He starts dancing.

He comes close to me.

What ae you doing Selim?

I say.

He suddenly sees me.

He looks just like you! I always say he looks like you.

He steps down.

He comes close to me and says...

So my baby-like beautiful wife...

...is giving me a baby, right?

And then he says...

New baby.

“New apartment”...

-Or something like that.-...and...

...goes running out of the apartment.

Apartment?

Something like that. I think it was “apartment”.

New apartment...

I think that’s what he said before he left.

Let’s hope it’s a good sign...

-Let’s hope so. -Anne. Fatih feels so bad.

I had this daydream the other day.

Perhaps Fatih told me in my dream what he couldn’t tell me.

I’m in the kitchen.

I’ve made this delicious cake.

It’s such a nice cake.

And then, I see Fatih coming towards me down the corridor.

He’s wearing this shiny jacket.

Not that shiny, but...

...like satin.

And he has very long hair.

Perhaps it symbolizes distress.

He’s so happy to see me.

So much that he’s about to dance!

Then, he suddenly punches the wall.

He leans his head against the wall, and says...

What did I do to deserve to be such a happy husband and father?

“I brought you from your hometown into this chaos...

...and now, you...

...you’re...

...giving this family its first grandchild. Are you aware of that?”

He says, “You deserve the best, the biggest of everything!

...and he begins to sob!

No way.

You know, because I’m making him a father. I think he’s very happy, but can’t express it.

Of course, giving such a nice, happy, loving family...

...its first grandchild...

...is no small accomplishment.

Who says you’ll give birth first?

I got pregnant first!

Doesn’t matter. I got pregnant right after you.

Doesn’t matter. I bore fruit first.

The light fell in my womb right after you!

Doesn’t matter. My egg boiled first!

Look at them, tweeting like birds! You’ll be such great mothers.

They’ll put your baby in your bosom...

You’ll get that sweet smell...

BOY / GIRL

BOY OR GIRL?

GIRL OR BOY?

Shall I pop it? Let’s count down.

Three, two, one!

-Fatih! -What color is it?

What color?

It’s a boy! It’s a boy!

I’ll have a baby!

15 WEEKS 19 WEEKS

-Selim, come here. -What is it?

Something very strange happened today.

-Nothing wrong with the baby, right? -No, nothing like that.

-I was sitting doing nothing. -Yes?

I suddenly got this inspiration. And I didn’t know what to do with it.

So I started writing a poem.

A poem?

Give me that notebook.

-You wrote it down? -Yes.

-Listen. -I’m listening.

Oh God...

Mine and yours, yours and mine

A baby of mine, from you, Selim

My baby, of you

Of me, who is one with you

What’s yours is with me As it is mine.

Sultan, 2019, Yeşilköy.

This may be one of the most emotional poems I’ve ever heard.

I know.

-Oh, my dear wife... -Shall I read it again?

-Read the part that goes, “Mine and yours...” -The emotional part?

-Right, the emotional one. -Okay.

Mine and yours, yours and mine A baby of mine, from you, Selim...

Think of it: Maybe she’ll run towards you when he’s about two years old.

-Yes. -She’ll put her hand on your shoulder.

Look into your eyes and read a poem that goes...

...“Dad, you’re my hero. You know that, right?”

I’m getting emotional.

Will she really read me a poem, like “You’re my hero”?

Her mother is a poet!

Oh.

-I’m so emotional. -Selim, come here.

Selim, come here! Selim!

Here I come!

Does my Efe want ice cream?

-Gizem, what’s wrong? -Nothing, Fatih.

My love, why are you crying?

I saw a very emotional video.

But we talked about this. You shouldn’t watch such videos.

You’re pregnant. You get emotional.

What was it? You must have watched another birth video.

No. They made this robot in Japan.

And?

You know, it walks, stumbles and falls.

-Poor thing. -Robot.

What’s so strange? It’s a robot.

-I see, it’s a robot. -No, but it stands up...

...stumbles and falls. Then it looks up...

...and smiles. And I...

-Goodness. -I don’t know, it made me so emotional.

Who wouldn’t get emotional...

Think of our little Efe, stumbling as he takes his first steps.

-Oh, wow... -Of course.

Then he’ll open his arms up and say, “Me daddy! Me daddy!”

I’ll never let you fall!

Show me that video.

This video... It moved me... So much...

So much.

You see?

It falls, and it smiles.

-Oh God... -See, it smiles.

-Poor thing. -I was so moved, Fatih...

-Ah... -You want your ice cream?

Yes.

What’s that?

Here you go, darling.

Fatih, I didn’t want this.

I wanted cocoa.

I’ll go and buy some for you.

I don’t want it now. You got my least favorite...

Brother.

-Fatih. -I can’t see you through those flowers.

Sultan has this decoration thing going on, you know...

That newspaper rack looks good over there.

Right. It matches the furniture too. We like it a lot.

Good.

Our curtain fringes don’t match. I think we’ll change them, Fatih.

-What color were they? -Like...

-...purple-red. -Plum.

Right, plum.

-That’s a bit dull. -Right. We’re thinking of making it light pink.

-Light pink would be great. -Especially with the white dresser.

-It would make it shine. -Exactly. It will make it shine.

-I never knew curtains were so important. -The tulle, even more so.

It complements everything.

Get a rustic laced one and you’ll see.

-Gold. -Right, gold.

I’m not feeling well at all.

Let’s have a football game tonight. I’m begging you. With all the shouting...

Well said, man.

These are not the men we are, Fatih! What’s happening to us?

The football folks don’t call us anymore. We no longer play.

That’s right. I’m getting depressed.

Wait a moment.

I have another idea.

-Good morning. -Good morning.

Good morning.

Like I said, since there’s nicotine in aubergines...

...I don’t want any aubergine dishes cooked at home.

-Good morning darling. -Good morning.

Fatih, the father.

Ah, you’re wondering about this... I’m having midwife interviews.

Trying to get to know the folks who will be with us at the birth, and three months afterwards.

I had no idea.

I’m really pleased.

Oh, really?

Anyway, please excuse me.

Okay, see you daddy. Goodbye.

So, you should be careful about these.

So many midwives...

Sorry.

-Did the person inside come out? -We’re waiting in line, son.

I have experience taking care of quadruplets.

-How could you get to them all? -We were four caretakers.

What do you think shouldn’t happen at a delivery?

The mothers scream way too much. Just deliver the baby!

-It’s too much, isn’t it? -We’ve all given birth.

Right.

-Do you like children? -Not at all.

-Great. Why not? -I just don’t have it in me.

Can you tell me a bit about yourself?

(speaks in another language)

I see. Do you speak Turkish?

-Thank you. -Thank you too.

Have you cared for a baby before?

I took care of my sister’s son. And my brother’s son.

-And my uncle’s daughter. -Great.

And my husband’s sister’s daughter. And my co-sister’s son.

And my neighbor’s nephew. Quite a few, but I don’t like it.

I’m tired of caring for babies.

Can you tell me about yourself?

I put all the required information on the form. You can read them.

I deliver babies.

And I take care of who I deliver.

I can help everybody deliver. Give me five babies and I’ll take care of them all.

Really?

Hülya, I have a question, if this is a good time.

-It’s a very good time. -Great.

When Melahat Lila is born, we’ll have a photo taken.

You know those newborn baby photos?

Wait, I’ll show you my favorite.

Look.

This one really moves me.

I was thinking...

Imagine a basket.

We put Melahat Lila in it.

She’s sleeping.

Next to her are rows of real chicken eggs. Hot.

And I’ll sprinkle...

...bits of hay between them.

It’ll be a little costly, but it’s worth it. And right in the middle... This is a surprise!

A real, well-behaved chicken!

Like Melahat Lila is a newborn chick!

Tell me to shut up!

The inspiration is coming again!

You know, this will be huge on Instagram.

See?

Look, he was so moved.

It’s incredible. The hormones.

My intelligence has peaked.

Oh, Selim is here. We’re going to...

...a very important course about Lila’s health.

Like all responsible parents.

Right. This photo shoot really had to be by the pool...

What’s wrong with having a pro photo of all three of us, me daddy?

If you call me “me daddy” again...

...I’ll get a fake passport and flee the country on a ship!

-Come on. -You’ll never find me.

-Really? -You’ll see.

Fatih, please. Just enjoy it.

Okay, okay.

Is he a good photographer? I hope he’s a sensible man.

-Let him just shoot quickly. -Fatih!

-Is that him? Is it? -Yes, Fatih.

-Come on, let’s go. Please. -Go on. Go on.

Let’s go, for God’s sake. Stop posing. Maniac!

And the gentlemen...

They open their arms wide.

Taking the mother and the baby under their wings like a bird.

Let’s do it.

Great. And as you do this...

...you can make any sound you like. Why?

Because you’re whatever bird you want to be. You’re free to make any sound you want.

Let me hear the sounds.

Come on, make a sound.

Sultan, I don’t understand this.

Make a bird sound.

-But why? -The teacher is coming! Do it!

Would you like to have a word?

Yes sir, let’s talk.

I understand you. It’s hard. It’s scary. It’s a big responsibility.

Does it scare you?

No. In fact, I’m not scared at all.

But I don’t understand this sound-making thing.

All that is sacred makes a sound.

And birth is sacred, isn’t it?

Birth, yes.

So open your arms.

Do you feel anything?

Something is coming, I guess.

So you know what to do now.

-Go ahead. -I think I’ll glide a bit.

Of course.

Go on! Great!

Stronger! Go on! Yes, go on!

Bravo! What does our bird sound like?

Woo-woo! Yes, great! Perfect.

Let’s do it! Tweet-tweet!

Fatih!

-Goodness! -What are you doing here?

You scared me. Don’t come at me like that.

You’re sitting there like a detective.

-Oh, you had an argument. -What?

-And you’re not going upstairs, right? -No.

-Look don’t do that. They can be grumpy now... -Brother, please. Don’t talk like that.

No argument. I’m just looking at the finances.

-What finances? -You know...

...the lady’s desires are putting me in a tight spot.

-Right. -The baby shower, the gender revelation party...

...delivery at a private hospital...

...the caretaker and all. The arrival of the baby will be a little costly.

I hope it’s true that babies “bring plentitude”.

This happens once in a lifetime, Fatih.

-We should do what it takes. -Right.

You should try to please your wife. As much as you can.

Right. And I can’t say no to her, but...

...I don’t know why we have to choose the most expensive, luxurious option in everything.

I’m questioning that, to be honest.

We’re becoming fathers!

Exactly.

My God.

His father’s little baby!

I can’t believe my little daughter is on the way!

I’ve got such little feet!

Little feet, and I’ve got a cute little nose!

Oh, that’s such a cute nose!

-What a cute nose! -So cute!

-Show me that nose! -So cute!

Little nose!

-What floor does this guy live? -I don’t know, but the guy must be going nuts.

-He must be thinking weird things about us. -That’s right.

35 WEEKS 39 WEEKS

Look at that!

Great.

She’s a wonderful woman. Amazing.

-Gizem, can we have a word? Can we talk? -Let’s talk, baby.

Well, I’m not sure we need...

...one more person at home.

What are you trying to tell me?

Darling, you’ll put a diamond ring on my finger after the birth, right?

Of course I will, my wife.

Oh wait! Oh...

Easy... Easy...

You know, Gizem’s husband gave her one when she got pregnant.

I don’t know where they got so much money!

Am I being wasteful? Is that what you mean?

The baby shower, the hotel...

Delivery at a private hospital, in a suite room...

All the cakes and candles you’ll give the visitors...

And now this baby moon thing comes up. I didn’t even know what it was!

I looked it up. It’s a pregnancy vacation...

Darling, you can barely walk around the house.

Perhaps we should slow down a bit, right?

I don’t know.

So you think I’ve changed!

Come on...

Sultan was very right.

-About what? -Never mind.

She said...

“Your husband can’t get you all that stuff, because he doesn’t have the money.”

“Don’t dream of a baby moon.” Well, never mind.

Did Sultan tell you that?

-And he said to Gizem... -What did he say?

He said: "We deserve the big apartment.”

“We’re giving them the first grandchild. My brother is so cunning...”

He’s been married for years, and he’s having a baby now to get the big apartment...”

And so on.

-What big apartment? -Your parents’.

Did Fatih say all that?

Yes. Supposedly Selim said...

“Fatoş got married in a hurry to get this apartment for free.”

“And now she’s having a baby to get the big apartment” and so on.

Anyway.

I want the apartment? Did my brother say that?

Yes.

He danced around the house, saying “We’re getting the big apartment!”

He did gypsy dances and all that.

Sultan, are you kidding?

Anyway, don’t tell anyone about this.

It’s between us.

I don’t want you to fall out with him for something like that.

Can’t my husband get me a diamond ring and an apartment?

-He can. -Of course.

My husband isn’t a useless man!

My husband isn’t a useless man!

Never mind.

Never mind. Don’t fall out with him.

Me, Melahat Lila and you, we can live in our little apartment.

Don’t you worry.

I don’t care about these things.

Good night, baby.

That’s uncalled for.

Why would he say that...

It’s alright. We’ll share our loaf of bread.

BROTHER

HOME SWEET HOME WELCOME

Good evening.

Good evening, brother.

-Hi Selim. -Hi Sultan.

Your dinner is ready. I’m going to Hülya’s.

Your parents are on the way. They’ll be late. That’s all. Here.

Hello.

Brother...

Gizem is at a visit...

...shall we have a word, if you have a minute?

Right, Fatih. I was going to...

...tell you the same.

Bestie!

What’s up?

Gizem is here.

I’ll brew tea for you.

What’s going on?

Are you stealing my besties now, loser?

Well, Hülya likes me a lot.

But this place has turned sour now. I’m leaving.

-Okay. -You three can sit together.

What? Three?

Sister Hülya, you and your eye bags!

-Would you like something to eat or drink? -No, I’m fine.

-Fatih... -Look, I had no intention to get married.

I met Gizem.

I fell in love with her. We suddenly decided to get married.

-Right? -And then, mom said...

...”Son, we have an empty apartment.”

“Don’t go around paying rent. Come and live here.”

I know about all that. Why are you telling me these, Fatih?

What’s happening with you?

I guess you forgot your own looks!

You fat caterpillar! Cross-eyed caterpillar!

Hey, I haven’t put on any weight.

You don’t have to envy me because I look like a model.

You’re jealous! You’re jealous!

Shut up, loudmouth!

It’s you who said...

You said, “My brother has been living there for free, for years.”

“And he’s having a baby now that he heard about the big apartment.”

Do you really think I’d say those things? Please!

Do your shower at home like a loser! And serve salad instead of cupcakes!

-And chickpeas! -I’m giving birth first! I get the apartment.

-No way you’re first! You idiot! -Get out of here, idiot!

You’re the idiot!

-Don’t let the door hit you on the way out! -Shut up, or I’ll hit you!

-Shut up or you’ll get a beating! -Come on!

Enough!

What kind of a way is that to talk to each other?

-She started it. -Do you think this is a game?

Are you having these babies just to show off?

-Hülya, don’t get us wrong... -I’ve been restraining myself, but...

...this is not about your hormones. All the apartments and stuff..

You don’t say, “I hope my baby is healthy...”

“...and I can give her a good education. Let her be a happy, self-confident, good child.”

You’re all about baby showers and Instagram and followers!

Shame on both of you!

I’ve had enough of you.

Get out of here!

But...

Why would I say those things?

I don’t care about the apartment or anything else! You can have it all.

-I don’t care. -Brother, please. You can have it.

You’re my brother. We’ve never thought of such things.

Gizem!

Tell my brother.

You know, Sultan said, “They’re having the baby to get the big apartment...”

I... I meant...

Sultan, did you say that?

No, that’s not what I said.

She said, “My husband got me a diamond ring. Yours didn’t get you one.”

I didn’t get you a diamond ring. Did you say that?

But she told me, “We’re better off than you. You can’t afford a baby shower.”

For God’s sake, you almost set us fighting each other.

We’re a family here! I’d say worse things, but you’re pregnant.

I’m out of here.

Brother, wait!

-Selim! -Fatih!

Shame on you, Gizem.

Look what’s become of us.

-Your fighting has corrupted our families. -Fatih, please.

Brother!

-Brother! -Fatih!

Brother!

Fatih!

Gizem.

I think my water is breaking!

Okay!

-Wait! -It’s too early!

Calm down. I’ll take you to the hospital now.

-Let’s sit and wait. -No. Come on. Please.

We’ll go to the hospital.

And I’ll call Selim now, okay?

Be calm. Breathe.

Girls, we’ll be there in a second!

Here we go.

It’s too early!

It’s alright, dear. I’m with you.

Don’t worry.

-Gizem. -Yes?

My mother died during my birth.

If something happens to me, take care of my baby, okay?

Sultan, shut up. Don’t talk like that.

We’re not thinking of bad things, okay? Don’t say that. Don’t think negative.

-Only think of good things, okay? -Let nothing happen to her!

Please, let it happen to me!

Nothing will go wrong, Sultan.

The doctor told you, right?

-What did he say? -He said, “She’ll be a fine baby.”

Right? He didn’t. I did.

Right. So don’t worry.

We’ll both hold our babies in our arms.

They’ll play together. Grow together.

You got the big apartment!

You really did!

You’re so cute!

(Swearing in German)

Sorry girls!

Sultan, I called them.

They’re on their way!

There we go.

The baby is coming!

-I can’t let you there, madam. -Can’t I be with my sister?

My dear.

Sultan!

She’s so sweet!

So she’s ours, right?

She’s ours! Her mother’s one and only!

-My one and only! -Look at her feet!

I can’t believe we made her!

We probably made her that “wow” night!

Selim!

Yes.

-Let’s see... -That was a good one.

-Doctor! -Oh, doctor...

Will she stay in the incubator for long?

Selim! Sultan!

She’s so beautiful!

-God bless her! -Wonderful!

-God bless her. -She has hair too!

-Congratulations. -She does, right?

-Hello. -Hello.

How is my niece’s health?

She’s fine. Very fine.

But if you gave birth the same day, you’d get at least ten thousand followers on Instagram.

She’s due soon. We’re waiting.

I hope she delivers soon. Or I’ll do it!

Fatih!

Yes.

Thank you.

You laughed so hard. It wasn’t so funny.

-Fatih, something’s happening! -What?

My water is breaking!

-Your what? -What?

Fatih, my water is breaking!

-Her water is breaking! -Fatih!

Doctor! Where did he go?

-Doctor! -Easy!

-Calm. Be calm. -I love you.

-Fatih! Watch out! -I’ve got him.

What luck! I’m here for another birth!

I’m so glad you’re here. I’m so glad I hired you.

-Okay. Okay. -Fatih!

Okay, sit here.

-Sit down. -What happened?

My son has grown up...

This photo got the most likes!

Yes, co-sis!

Hey, don’t forget me. I’m getting jealous.

Perhaps it’s your turn now.

Well, not everyone has to have kids.

Right.

-Are you alright? Is everything good? -I’m fine, dad. Thank you.

Uncle Hamdullah, you should account for the decline in the stock value.

You said the same for Bitcoin. Look what happened.

I’m going for the digital platform stock. Like Sakashi Nakamoto said...

“The best software is Exodus”. Right?

Fatih, congratulations.

I’m sure you’ll be a very attentive father.

Thank you. We all need to learn these things.

Look, the girls are starting a company.

Oh, what company?

-Doorway decoration and... -Creative child rooms.

You can sell my baby shoes too!

And we’ll do the cooking.

I’ve started a cooking course.

-Congratulations. -Really?

Here comes the gas!

Four times in four minutes. A record!

-My daughter does that in two minutes. -Certainly, dad.

Melahat, I guess you won’t move to Ayvalık now.

There’s no way I’m leaving my grandchildren behind.

So you’re staying in the apartment.

-Can you answer my phone? -I’ll take it.

Oh, it’s Yavuz!

-Is it a video call? -Yes.

-Is it Yavuz? -Mom, dad. Come here.

-Mom, come. -Where is he?

-What’s up? -Here it comes.

-Look, look!-Hello everyone.

I can’t wait! I’ll come and see my nieces.

-Come. We’re here. -Of course. This is your home.

But I’m not coming alone.

I’m getting married too!

-Congratulations! -Yavuz!

-Your uncle’s getting married! -Who is the unlucky bride?

-She’s in the shower. -In the shower.

-Don’t film her in the shower! -That’s a shame!

Let me introduce you to my family. They’re on the phone.

Say hello.

I don’t feel like talking to a couple of puerperant wives now.

Let’s go.

Let’s get out of here. Come on.

Come, son.

Did he say “puerperant wives”?

He definitely did, sister.

THE END

Girls, I don’t mean to flaunt, but...

...mine is bigger!

Oh my God...

Look, I polish it...

I’ll get it right.

It looks better when I lick it…

It’s so heavy.

This one too.

My neck is hanging...

It’s so heavy.

This one too.

Look.

I’ll get this one right.

What do I say next? I’ll get it done at one go.

The wedding dress.

The wedding dress.

We had this neighbor’s daughter... She wasn’t like you. She was a beautiful girl.

Her honeymoon went bad.

I laugh when she does that!

Cut!

Cut!

Ready.

Two...

Cut!

Let’s take a five minute break.

Every organ on your face is so big!

Why are you laughing out loud!

Dad, Sultan’s rice or mom’s?

Then I remembered Melahat had invited me for breakfast.

I made German cake...

-That was so... -You were going well...

That was so good...

Watch out!

Stay away from me!

Why are you laughing? We’re filming with sound!

I can’t believe this...

You kept walking around the table, staring at me and saying...

Cut!

He’ll run towards you.

He’ll put his hand on your shoulder.

He’ll look into your eyes and read a poem that goes, “Dad, you’re my hero.”

“You know that, right?”

Guess whose husband he is...

He’s my husband...

My breadwinner, the owner of my heart

My sweetheart

He’s my husband...

My husband...