Original subtitles

FOURSCORE AND 1,145 YEARS AGO

OUR FOREFATHERS' FOREHEADS CONCEIVED A NEW NATION.

AND THIS PRESIDENTS' DAY, WE HONORETH THOSE VALUES

THAT MY BODY FOUGHT AND DIED FOR.

VALUES LIKE THIS BRAND-NEW PLYMOUTH V'GER.

HI, I'M MALFUNCTIONING EDDIE, AND I'M MALFUNCTIONING SO BADLY

I'M PRACTICALLY GIVING THESE CARS AWAY.

HEY, LET'S GO CAR SHOPPING.

MY PARENTS PROMISED IF I GOT ALL Bs, THEY'D BUY ME A BAR

AND I GOT ALL Cs.

MIND IF I TAG ALONG?

I'VE GOT TO BRING MY ASS IN FOR SERVICING.

THE RECALL NOTICE SAYS IT COULD BURST

INTO FLAME IN A LOW-SPEED COLLISION.

NO WONDER YOU'VE BEEN STAYING

AT THE BACK OF CONGA LINES LATELY.

I'LL GET MY COAT.

LET'S GO, BENDER.

HELLO.

I AM VICTOR.

AND I KNOW MANY THINGS

ABOUT THE ART OF UNLOADING

FINE CARS ON BEAUTIFUL WOMEN.

UH-HUH. NOW TELL HER SHE'S WITTY AND SOPHISTICATED.

UH-UH-UH.

A GENTLEMEN ALWAYS SELLS A LADY A CAR FIRST.

THIS IS THE BETA ROMEO.

YES, THE BETA ROMEO.

NOTE THE CROSS- YOUR-HEART SEAT BELT

WHICH PROTECTS, LIFTS AND SEPARATES.

[ Slurps ]

SPOTTED HER THE MINUTE

YOU WALKED IN, DIDN'T YOU, SIR?

SHE'S A REAL BEAUTY.

YEP, SHE'S BEAUTIFUL COFFEE ALL RIGHT.

NO, THE FORD THUNDER- COUGARFALCONBIRD.

NOTHING MAKES YOU FEEL MORE LIKE A MAN

THAN A THUNDER- COUGARFALCONBIRD.

SO HOW MUCH WERE YOU THINKING OF SPENDING

ON THIS THUNDER- COUGARFALCONBIRD?

SORRY. I'M NOT HERE TO BUY.

I UNDERSTAND.

IT'S WONDERFUL YOU DON'T CARE

IF ANYONE QUESTIONS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION.

I CARE PLENTY.

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO MAKE THEM STOP.

ONE WORD-- THUNDERCOUGARFALCONBIRD.

THE LUXURIOUS SEATS ARE STUFFED WITH EAGLE DOWN.

AND THE DASHBOARD INLAID WITH THE BEAKS OF A THOUSAND EAGLES.

ALSO, THERE ARE SOME EAGLES UNDER THE FLOORBOARDS.

THAT'S AN AWFUL LOT OF EAGLE.

YES, AND YET--

[ Sighs ]

WHAT'S WRONG?

IT IS JUST THAT THE LUXURY EDITION

HAS SO MUCH MORE EAGLE.

IT SADDENS ME TO THINK OF YOU MISSING OUT.

OH, DON'T BE SAD.

MY PARENTS ARE PAYING

AND THEY'RE INCREDIBLY RICH.

[ Moaning And Grunting ]

I INSTALLED SHOCK-ABSORBING BUMPERS

TO REDUCE THE RISK OF CATASTROPHIC BUTT FAILURE.

[ Gasps ]

YOU, SIR, HAVE DEFACED A NATIONAL TREASURE.

I DEMAND YOU RESTORE MY BUTTOCKS

TO THEIR FORMER GLORY!

[ Whistles ]

ALL RIGHT, BUT SOONER OR LATER THAT ASS IS GOING TO BLOW

AND WHEN IT DOES, I JUST PRAY

YOU'RE NOT MOONING SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT.

SMEESH, LEELA.

THIS CAR HAS EVERYTHING

A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LIKE ME NEEDS.

VICTOR SAID SO.

[ Chuckles ]

[ Softly ] NO DOG FOOD FOR VICTOR TONIGHT.

OKAY.

THE STICKER SAYS $55,000.

BUT WE'LL ONLY GO AS HIGH AS

SAY--

$60,000.

OH, I WILL HAVE TO ASK MY MANAGER.

AMY, YOU DON'T GO UP FROM THE STICKER PRICE.

I THOUGHT IT WAS AN AUCTION.

HE IS NOT TOO HAPPY.

I'M SORRY.

$80,000?

UH-OH.

I'M TERRIBLE AT PARALLEL PARKING.

[ Bang ]

[ Hermes ] AND NOW YOU'RE ASKING FOR A DAY OFF?

GET OUT OF MY AND MY SIGHT.

YOU'RE BOGARTING MY PATIENCE.

HERMES, WHO WERE YOU YELLING AT?

MESELF.

I ASKED MESELF FOR VALENTINE'S DAY OFF

BUT I WAS IN NO MOOD FOR ANY OF MY SHENANIGANS.

VALENTINE'S DAY IS COMING.

OH, CRAP.

I FORGOT TO GET A GIRLFRIEND AGAIN.

WELL, SINCE NEITHER OF US HAS A DATE

WHY DON'T WE--

YOU JUST ASSUME I CAN'T GET A VALENTINE'S DATE?

SHALL WE SAY 8:00?

HEY, I'M TAKING MY NEW CAR OUT

FOR A SPIN TO MERCURY.

ANYBODY WANT TO COME?

YEAH, OKAY. WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE?

THE USUAL.

BOILING LEAD, OCEANS OF LAVA.

SO WHAT? SHORTS?

[ Pop Music Playing ]

BOY, THIS A/C IS INCREDIBLE.

OOH-OOH.

I'D BETTER TURN ON THE HEATER, TOO.

BOY, THIS HEATER IS INCREDIBLE.

I'D BETTER TURN UP THE A/C SOME MORE.

HEY, HOW ABOUT SOME ICY MARGARITAS?

YEAH.

WE'RE SLOWING DOWN.

DON'T WORRY.

I'LL HIT THE FUEL GUZZLER.

WHO WANTS POP-TARTS?

[ Engine Stops ]

AH.

[ Fry ] UH-OH.

IT'S OKAY. I HAVE AN EMERGENCY PHONE.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

SPLUH, IT'S A VIDEO-PHONE.

LUCKY I'M A MEMBER

OF THE AUSTRO-AFRO-ANTARCTICO- AMERASIAN AUTO ASSOCIATION.

HELLO. SEPTUPLE-A?

WHEW.

OH, IT'LL BE A COUPLE HOURS.

OH, I'M GOING TO GET SWEAT ON MY SWEAT SUIT.

HEY, TELL ME SOMETHING.

YOU'VE GOT ALL THIS MONEY.

HOW COME YOU ALWAYS DRESS LIKE YOU'RE DOING YOUR LAUNDRY?

I GUESS 'CAUSE MY PARENTS KEEP

TELLING ME TO BE MORE LADYLIKE.

AS THOUGH.

I'VE BEEN THERE.

MY FOLKS WERE ALWAYS ON ME TO GROOM MYSELF

AND WEAR UNDERPANTS.

WHAT AM I, THE POPE?

[ Laughing ]

YEAH, AND IF YOU WERE THE POPE

THEY'D BE ALL, "STRAIGHTEN YOUR POPE HAT."

AND "PUT ON YOUR GOOD VESTMENTS."

[ Laughing ]

[ Chuckles ]

YOU KNOW, FRY, IT'S NICE TO FIND

SOMEONE I CAN TALK TO ABOUT STUFF AND JUNK.

IT'S LIKE WE FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT JUNK AND STUFF

OR WHATEVER.

OH-HO!

OH.

SO WHILE THEY'RE TOWING US

YOU WANT TO DO IT?

YEAH.

[ Tow Truck Driver ] YO-HO-HO-HO!

WHICH CONCLUDES THE SUMMARY OF THE MOVIE I SAW LAST NIGHT.

NOW, ANY OLD BUSINESS?

[ All ] NO.

ANY NEW BUSINESS?

[ All ] NO.

ANYONE SPEND THE NIGHT TOGETHER?

NO. NO. NO.

YEP.KIND OF.

[ All Gasp ]

WHAT?

OH, MY GOD.

WE RAN OUT OF FUEL ON MERCURY AND ONE THING LED TO ANOTHER.

AND IT LED THERE AGAIN WHEN WE GOT HOME.

[ Both Giggling ]

[ Sighing ]

CONGRATULATIONS, FRY.

YOU SNAGGED THE PERFECT GIRLFRIEND.

AMY'S RICH.

SHE'S PROBABLY GOT OTHER CHARACTERISTICS.

BENDER!

ROMANCE ISN'T ABOUT MONEY.

OH, SO IT'S JUST COINCIDENCE

THAT ZOIDBERG HERE IS DESPERATELY POOR

ANDMISERABLY LONELY?

PUH-LEASE.

FOR YOUR INFORMATION, IT'S BECAUSE HE'S HIDEOUS.

MMM.

WELL, I THINK FRY AND AMY GO TOGETHER

LIKE A LIME AND A COCONUT.

DO I HEAR WEDDING BELLS?

WHAT?

NO!

REALLY. OH, DEAR.

OH, YOU'RE BOTH VERY LUCKY.

I'D PAY ANYTHING TO END MY MISERABLE LONELINESS.

IF ONLY I WEREN'T SO DESPERATELY POOR.

WAIT. YOU MEAN PEOPLE

WILL PAY GOOD MONEY FOR ROMANCE?

I THINK I HAVE A SCHEME SO DEVIOUSLY CLEVER THAT I--

$500 AND TIME SERVED.

STUPID ANTI-PIMPING LAWS.

WELL, PAY THE MAN.

BENDER, HONEY, WE LOVE YOU.

SURE, BABY, I KNOW IT.

AH, COMPUTER DATING-- IT'S LIKE PIMPING

BUT YOU RARELY HAVE TO USE THE PHRASE "UPSIDE YOUR HEAD."

BENDER, THIS IS STUPID.

WHY WOULD ANYONE COME TO YOU FOR ROMANTIC HELP?

HEY! DON'T MAKE ME GO UPSIDE YOUR HEAD.

FRY! AMY!

PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON.

I NEED A STAPLER!

STOP. STOP.

IF YOU INTERRUPT THE MATING DANCE

THE MALE WILL BECOME ENRAGED

AND MAUL US WITH HIS FEARSOME GONAD.

IT'S WORKING.

THEY THINK WE'RE MAKING OUT.

[ Both Giggling ]

WAIT.

WHY AREN'T WE MAKING OUT?

I DON'T KNOW.

OKAY, MR.--

SMITH. ZAPP SMITH. BRANNIGAN.

JUST CHECK OFF THE THINGS

YOU'RE LOOKING FOR IN A LOVE PARTNER.

LET'S SEE.

OH, YES.

YES, DEFINITELY.

MMM, I'D LIKE SOME OF THAT.

MMM.

I'LL JUST HAVE EVERYTHING ON THE MENU.

NOW, TO RUN IT

THROUGH OUR HIGH-SPEED ROMANCE-ALOGICAL DATAFIER.

BEEP-BEE-DE-BEEP-BEEP.

BEEP. BEE-DE-BEE-BEEP-BEEP.

BEEP.

SAY HELLO TO MISS RIGHT.

HELLO.

MMM.

WOW.

WE'RE GREAT KISSERS.

YEAH.

HEY, LATER, YOU WANT TO DRIVE OUT TO EUROPA?

WE COULD HAVE A PICNIC

AND SPIT WATERMELON SEEDS AT JUPITER.

HEY, YEAH.

I USED TO SPIT AT STUFF BACK IN THE 20th CENTURY.

AH, IT'S COOL HOW WE SORT OF THINK EXACTLY ALIKE

AND JUNK.

YEAH.

YOU KNOW, FRY, I REALLY LIKE HANGING OUT WITH YOU.

[ Fry ] EVERYTHING WAS GOING GREAT.

THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN, SHE'S TALKING ABOUT HANGING OUT.

HANGING OUT?

SHE'S GETTING WAY TOO SERIOUS.

I'M NOT A ONE-WOMAN MAN, LEELA.

YOU'LL BE BACK TO ZERO SOON ENOUGH.

DON'T YOU GET IT? SHE'S SMOTHERING ME.

HI.

YOU SEE? YOU SEE?

NOW SHE'S BOTHERING ME WHEN I'M AT WORK.

FRY--

I'M DOING MY JOB-- THERE'S AMY.

I SPEND A FEW HOURS SELECTING A CANDY FROM THE MACHINE--

THERE'S AMY.

I WAKE UP THE MORNING AFTER SLEEPING WITH AMY--

THERE'S AMY.

I THINK YOU'RE OVERREACTING.

AM I?

[ Echoing ] AM I?!

FACE IT. I'M A PRIZE CATCH.

[ Burps ]

I MEAN, I'M PULLING DOWN DELIVERY-BOY MONEY.

FRY, SHE'S PULLING DOWN BILLIONAIRE TRUST-FUND MONEY.

THEN SHE WANTS ME AS A TROPHY HUSBAND.

LEELA, YOU GOTTA COME TO EUROPA WITH US.

I CAN'T BE ALONE WITH HER.

SO, READY FOR A SECLUDED PICNIC

WITH JUST YOU AND ME?

HEY, YOU KNOW WHO LOVES

SECLUDED PICNICS WITH JUST YOU AND ME?

UH...

DR. ZOIDBERG.

DID SOMEONE SAY SOMETHING ABOUT A FREE HOT MEAL?

[ Munching And Gobbling ]

MMM. I HAVEN'T EATEN SINCE TUESDAY.

BIRD EGGS... ANIMAL SLICES...

DRY WOVEN REEDS.

ALL GONE.

CAN I DRIVE?

NO.

SO, FRY, YOU BUSY TOMORROW?

I GOT TWO TICKETS TO THE BIG APE FIGHT.

GEEZ, WE'RE ALREADY PLANNING TO SPEND VALENTINE'S DAY TOGETHER.

ISN'T THAT ENOUGH?

OKAY. SURE.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO FOR VALENTINE'S DAY?

OH, SO ALL OF A SUDDEN

WE'RE SPENDING VALENTINE'S DAY TOGETHER?

YOU JUST SAID--

THAT'S IT, AMY.

WE HAVE TO TALK.

ZOIDBERG, YOU DRIVE.

WA-HOO.

[ Grunting ]

[ Fry] PARDON ME. EXCUSE ME.

AH, I'LL JUST TURN THE WHEEL TO MAXIMUM FASTNESS.

AMY, YOU KNOW HOW, AT FIRST, YOU LIKE CHOCOLATE

BUT THEN YOU START TO GET TIRED OF IT

'CAUSE IT ALWAYS WANTS TO HANG OUT WITH YOU?

HUH? YOU DON'T LIKE CHOCOLATE?

LOOK, COULD CHOCOLATE JUST LET ME FINISH?

VROOM, VROOM.

AND THE WINNER OF THE BIG CAR RACE IS HOT ROD ZOIDBERG!

AHH.

AMY, WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS

I THINK MAYBE YOU AND I SHOULD STOP--

[ Loud Snapping Sound ]

[ Zoidberg ] OH-OH.

HERE, YOU DRIVE.

[ Screaming ]

FRY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

OH, MY HEAD IS KILLING ME.

WHAT HAPPENED?

WAS ANYBODY HURT?

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, OF COURSE NOT.

NOBODY BUT YOU.

I'M AFRAID YOUR BODY WAS BADLY DAMAGED IN THE CRASH.

HOW BADLY?

THAT'S IT OVER THERE.

[ Screams ]

DON'T WORRY.

I MANAGED TO KEEP YOUR HEAD ALIVE WITH SOME QUICK SURGERY.

WHERE IS IT?

THERE.

LOOKS LIKE WE'LL BE SPENDING

A LOT MORE TIME TOGETHER, FRY.

[ Fry Screaming ]

[ Clicking Tongue ]

THIS SORT OF THING ALWAYS HAPPENS

WITH OFFICE ROMANCES.

DON'T WORRY, FRY.

WE'LL HAVE YOUR BODY ALL FIXED UP

IN A FEW DAYS.

OOPS-A-DAISY.

[ Bumping And Grunting ]

WELL, AMY, I'LL TRY NOT TO INTERFERE

WITH YOUR LIFE TOO MUCH.

FRY!

OH, SORRY.

I GUESS I CONTROL THAT ARM.

WHOO, WHOO-HOO, WHOO!

SO, WHAT WAS IT YOU WANTED TO TALK ABOUT

BEFORE WE CRASHED, ANYWAY?

OH, THAT.

MAYBE WE'D BETTER TALK IN PRIVATE.

[ Whispering ] I'LL MEET YOU IN THE CLOSET.

AMY, I REALLY LIKE YOU

AS A FRIEND

BUT I THINK WE'RE SPENDING

TOO MUCH TIME TOGETHER.

YOU'RE BREAKING UP WITH ME?

I JUST THINK

WE SHOULD START SEEING OTHER PEOPLE.

BUT I WAS REALLY HAVING FUN.

[ Sighs ]

IF THAT'S HOW YOU FEEL--

I'M SORRY, BUT IT IS.

WELL, WHATEVER.

HEY, LISTEN, AS LONG AS WE'RE NOT SEEING EACH OTHER

YOU MIND IF I ASK SOMEONE ELSE OUT FOR VALENTINE'S DAY?

HUH?!

I MEAN, UNLESS IT'D MAKE YOU FEEL BAD

BEING A THIRD WHEEL.

HEY, I CAN GET A DATE, TOO.

NOW THAT I'M SINGLE

I'LL ATTRACT ALL SORTS OF WOMEN.

WITH MY BODY

I THINK YOU MIGHT ONLY ATTRACT

ONE SORT OF WOMAN.

OH!

OH.

SO... HOW'S BUSINESS?

[ Clicking ]

ARE YOU FAMILIAR WITH MY FRIEND

AL GORE?

I'M TELLING YOU

LOSERS GET REALLY DESPERATE AROUND VALENTINE'S DAY.

YEAH. IT'S PATHETIC, ALL RIGHT.

[ Whistling ]

♪ DUM, DA-DA-DOOT, DE-DE, DEET ♪

HOW MUCH?

500 BUCKS. DONE.

ZAPP BRANNIGAN OKAY?

NO. 600.

[ Grunting ]

OH, HEY, LEELA

UM, CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR A MINUTE

IN PRIVATE?

OH, NO PROBLEM.

[ Singing Softly ]

THIS IS AN EMERGENCY.

AMY MADE VALENTINE'S PLANS WITH SOME GOON

AND I'M GOING TO BE STUCK THERE

LONELY AND MISERABLE.

WILL YOU BE MY DATE?

PLEASE?

YOU'RE TOO LATE, FRY.

I'M SHARING VALENTINE'S DAY WITH A VERY SPECIAL MAN.

HE'S NOT ZAPP BRANNIGAN OR ANYTHING.

THEN I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO DO SOMETHING

SO PITIFUL AND EMBARRASSING

THAT I'M ASHAMED TO TELL YOU ABOUT IT.

BENDER'S IN HIS OFFICE.THANKS.

[ Singing Louder ]

I GOT YOUR HOOKUP, FRY.

NOW, MY USUAL FEE'S 500 BUCKS, BUT SEEING AS HOW IT'S YOU

I'LL NEED IT IN ADVANCE.

OKAY, FRY.

WE'RE DONE PUTTING ON THE BRA.

WHY EXACTLY DID YOU SHAVE YOUR LEGS, ANYWAY?

ARE YOU EXPECTING SOMETHING TO HAPPEN

WITH YOUR VALENTINE'S DATE?

WHAT BUSINESS IS IT OF YOURS?

YOU'RE USING AN AWFUL LOT OF MAKEUP THERE.

THIS IS DEODORANT.

WHAT DOES IT DO?

[ Doorbell Rings ]

COME ON IN, GARY.

I'LL JUST BE ANOTHER 20 MINUTES.

[ Door Creaks ]

[ Gary ] I'LL BE WAITING.

20 MINUTES?

YOU'RE PRACTICALLY READY NOW.

YEAH, BUT IT'S GOOD TO MAKE THEM WAIT A LITTLE.

OH, GOD, IT'S TRUE!

[ Slurping ]

THAT DRESS LOOKS GREAT ON YOU.

THANKS.THANKS.

WHERE ISSHE?

I MUST SAY, AMY, YOU'RE ALL MADE UP.

JUST LIKE FRY'S DATE.

GET IT?

UH-UH.

I'VE GOT A DATE.

SHE'LL BE ALONG ANY MINUTE.

FRY! LOOK WHO I FOUND.

IT'S PETUNIA, YOUR DREAM GIRL.

HOW'S THEM EATS?

UH--

DON'T MIND IF I DO.

KIDS'LL BE HUNGRY.

SHE SEEMS A LITTLE OLD FOR ME.

SHE ISWELL-TRAVELED

AND I DON'T MEAN SHE TRAVELS A LOT.

WHEELS FELL OFF MY HOUSE.

NOW, HOW ABOUT A ROSE FOR THE LADY?

FIVE BUCKS A POP.

I'LL TAKE ONE.

OH, YEAH? WELL, I WANT ONE, TOO.

EIGHT BUCKS.

YOU JUST SAID--

DEMAND SUDDENLY SKYROCKETED.

YOU ALL SAW IT!

[ Sighs ]

LEELA, MEET YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND, SAL.

EEH! NICE EYEBALL, EYEBALL.

NICE ASS, ASS.

OOH, SPARKS.

BUY HER A ROSE.

I GUARANTEE SHE'LL PUT OUT.

AH, I'LL TAKE MY CHANCES.

[ Zapp ] CHEERS.

[ In Deep Voice ] CHEERS.

SO, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR PROSPECTS.

YOU A GOOD GAMBLER?

WELL, MA'AM, I--

WHAT'S YOUR GAME?

BINGO? KENO?

WAIT A MINUTE.

YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR OWN BODY.

NO, BUT I CONTROL THIS ARM.

SLOTS PLAYER, HUH?

SORRY, BUT I THINK I CAN DO BETTER.

WAIT! COME BACK, UH, DARLING.

CAN'T, HON.

I GOT TO CATCH MY BUS BACK TO NUTLEY.

I'D KISS YOU GOOD NIGHT

BUT I LOST MY TEETH PULLING OUT A STUMP.

SO ANYWAYS, LEELA

I'D LOVE TO TAKE A WHACK AT YOU

BUT THAT 10:15 TO NUTLEY AIN'T GOING NOWHERES

WITHOUT YOURS TRULY BEHIND THE WHEEL.

EXCUSE ME.

DID YOU SAY, "10:15 TO NUTLEY"?

WHY, YES, I DID.

[ Dramatic Music Playing ]

[ Both Moaning ]

BENDER, DID YOU JUST ROUND UP OUR DATES

AT THE BUS STATION?

OF COURSE NOT.

ANYBODY'S ELSE FOR NUTLEY?

[ All Agreeing ]

BABY, WAIT.

YOU DIDN'T SHOW ME YOUR SURPRISE.

[ Mumbling ]

OH, GEEZ, GET A ROOM.

MAYBE LATER.

[ Dramatic Chord Playing ]

UH, H-HEY! I HAVE AN IDEA.

LET'S ALL GO OUT FOR ICE CREAM.

ACTUALLY, I THOUGHT AMY MIGHT LIKE

TO COME BACK TO MY PLACE FOR COFFEE.

I DON'T REALLY LIKE COFFEE.

NEITHER DO I.

[ Dramatic Chord Playing ]

OOH. I FEEL A LITTLE TIPSY.

[ Dramatic Chord Playing ]

LET ME PICK UP THE CHECK.

[ Dramatic Chord Playing ]

[ Roaring ] NO!

[ Loud Crashing Sounds ]

THAT'S IT! I'M GETTING THE HELL OUT OF HERE!

[ Grunting And Groaning ]

[ Groans ]

WHY, IF IT ISN'T MY FAVORITE HEAD

ON AMY'S BODY: FRY.

AH! LEELA!

WE WERE JUST ON OUR WAY OUT.

NONSENSE.

THE EVENING'S YOUNG.

SO, GARY, WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?

I'M A BANKING INDUSTRY REGULATOR.

[ Groans ]

REALLY?

YOU KNOW, I HEARD THAT BANKING INDUSTRY REGULATIONS

ARE REALLY VERY SIMPLE.

OH, NO. THAT'S NOT TRUE.

YOU SEE, MODERN BANKING REGULATIONS

ARE A PRODUCT OF FIVE DIFFERENT REGULATORY TRADITIONS.

SIX IF YOU WANT TO GET TECHNICAL.

OH, I DO.

IT ALL BEGAN IN 1410, WHEN A NUMBER OF NOBLEMEN

CONVENED--

[ Whispering ] THANK YOU.

THERE YOU ARE.

GOOD AS NEW, EXCEPT FOR YOUR DORSAL FIN.

I'M AFRAID I COULDN'T FIND IT

AFTER THE CRASH.

CAN I LIVE WITHOUT IT?

IF YOU CALL THAT LIVING.

I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND

WHY YOU WOULDN'T LET ME

GRAFT A LASER CANNON ONTO YOUR CHEST

TO CRUSH THOSE WHO DISOBEY YOU.

OH, BUT I GUESS

WE'RE JUST TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE.

SO, UH, THANKS FOR THE RIDE, AMY

AND I HOPE THERE ARE NO HARD FEELINGS

ABOUT YOUR DATE... OR STUFF.

IT'S OKAY.

I HAD FUN, AND IF I EVER FEEL LONELY

I CAN JUST LOOK OVER AT THIS DISFIGURING SCAR

AND THINK OF YOU.

[ Sighs ]

WELL, ANYWAY, IT'S NICE TO HAVE MY OWN BODY BACK.

AHH!

OH.

[ Leela ] SO, HOW'S THE OLD CORPSE?

EVERYTHING HOOKED UP OKAY?

SEEMS TO BE.

MY NECK'S JUST A LITTLE TENDER.

OW! COOL.

OW!

LISTEN, LEELA

THANKS FOR RESCUING ME LAST NIGHT.

ANYTIME. I ACTUALLY ENJOYED HANGING OUT WITH YOU.

YEP. EVERYTHING WORKED OUT GREAT

THANKS TO GOOD OLD BENDER.

COME ON.

IT'S NOT LIKE YOU INTENTIONALLY SET US UP WITH BAD DATES

SO WE'D SPEND VALENTINE'S DAY TOGETHER.

DIDN'T I, LEELA?

DIDN'T I?

[ Leela ] NO! YOU DIDN'T!

YOU JUST CORRALLED A BUNCH OF STIFFS AT THE BUS STATION

AND POCKETED OUR MONEY.

TRUE, BUT IN THE END

ISN'T THAT WHAT VALENTINE'S DAY IS REALLY ALL ABOUT?

YEAH.

I GUESS SO.

[ Guffawing ]

WATCH THE NECK. WATCH THE NECK!

MY ASS!

MY BEAUTIFUL--

[ Explosion ]