Original subtitles

["Stick Around" by Rachael Yamagata playing]

? Baby, you've caught my eye ?

[song continues, muffled]

[ominous music]

[ominous music continues]

[whirring]

Got ya.

[heavy thud]

- [gasp] - [roaring]

You broke into the wrong house, kitty cat.

It's not how it looks.

Oh, it's exactly how it looks.

[attack efforts]

[grunting]

Oh, shit.

[roaring]

Please don't-- no!

[growling]

[groaning]

[coughing, gasping]

Fine, you can have it.

Oh!

[choking]

JORDAN: No, no, no. This is ridiculous.

I have been a high level thief for almost two years.

AGENT: Jordan, I know you're frustrated. As your agent, that's normal.

Frustrated? How is any of this normal?

I am a real fucking thief.

AGENT: Yes, but Jackson Pepper told you that the part is

a character adept at social engineering.

- Yeah? - No, no-no-no. Listen to me.

I steal things.

I steal them and then I deliver them to a handler whose identity is a mystery.

Because everything is a mystery, and then a riddle,

and then a riddle inside another fucking mystery.

I mean, I could be working for a Russian oligarch for all I know.

- You need to fix this now. - AGENT: Okay, but you didn't want--

Two years ago-- just two years ago-- I was in the height of my career.

I could have starred in five new movies by now.

AGENT: You didn't want five movies.

You wanted to star in one movie, a Jackson Pepper movie,

so you could win an Oscar.

I know, I know, I know. But, no, not just win an Oscar.

You know, I was sick of being the puppet of some out-of-touch director

who just had me standing there while the male lead saves the day.

Why can't I fucking save the day for once?

AGENT: Okay, Jordan, you are a classically-trained actor,

and all the greats have been where you are right now.

JORDAN: Stealing bearer bonds and ancient artifacts

from rich people's houses? I mean, you know,

I should have just taken the Tic-Tac-Toe movie.

At least Tac is at least a three-dimensional character.

AGENT: Well, Olivia Colman spent four years in the Royal Navy

training to be a submarine captain

so she could get an Oscar for the Jackson Pepper movie.

And that was only to win Best Supporting Actress.

Anyway, Jordan, look,

if you want to quit, I'll support you.

Netflix has six serial killer shows in development.

I'm sure I can get you a part in one.

Hello? Earth to Jordan, you still there, bud?

Okay, I will pull one more job, and if that's not good enough

for Jackson Pepper, then fine, I will play a serial killer.

AGENT: Okay, um, that's fair.

So, just so you know, serial killers are always played by men.

So, you're probably gonna have to be the victim or prostitute--

[suspenseful music]

There you are.

What are you up to?

[soft chatter]

Thank you so much.

- Can I help you? - Yeah, what bus are you waiting on?

Waiting for a friend. She's got the tickets.

No, what bus?

- Fres-no. - No, Fresno left two hours ago.

Hey, let me ask you a question. What kind of sick man

shows up at a bus terminal to harass women?

- Excuse me? - Oh, cut the shit.

We already had somebody complain about you making

crude hand gestures and primal noises.

Hey, Lorenzo!

You can either leave here on your own accord,

or I can have Lorenzo here throw your ass out.

- So those are my two options? - Only two.

MANAGER: Pick one. Clock's ticking.

Hey... hey!

Come on.

[horn honking]

Yes, yes!

[dashboard chiming]

[tires screech]

Fuck!

[soft chatter]

I need you to open up locker 219.

Look, I thought I told you to get--

219, open it the fuck up.

Nope, it's empty.

Suspect fled in a black Mercedes, partial plate ending in N654.

Didn't catch the rest. Run it through the system.

No, I couldn't identify her. She looked like Jordan King.

Yeah, the actor.

You didn't see the "Jeffersons" reboot?

[scoffs] It's like, why go and shit up a classic?

Okay, asshole.

Where's my next clue?

AUTOMATED VOICE: Resuming route to...

38641 Sterling View Way.

- See you soon, Jordan. - I'm so sick of this shit.

[sighing]

"Your final heist is not a heist at all.

"It's a package you'll transport that's relatively small.

"It stands at five-foot-five if it's wearing lifts.

"It'll be running and screaming and hard to miss.

[distant police siren]

"See, tonight you steal not jewels, not gems, not anything fun.

"But tonight you are a getaway driver

for a fugitive on the run."

What the fuck is that supposed to mean?

KEVIN: Help!

Help!

Aah! Ah, shit--

"He'll be running and screaming and hard to miss."

KEVIN: Help me! Help me! I gotta get out of here!

Help! Somebody help! Help me!

- Help! - Kevin.

Jordan?

["Stick Around" by Rachael Yamagata playing]

WOMAN: ? I've been in trouble before with my rushing in ?

? But I'm willing to take that chance again ?

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